Monday Night Raw #1070: November 25, 2013!!!

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The Infamous Informer

Monday Night Raw #1070: November 25, 2013!!!

F**K AN INTRO!!! I think what happened at Survivor Series after Raw went off the air told the story:

Watch from 19:52…

I hope Vincent Kennedy turns up!!!! RAW #1070: HOLD DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZShout out to Mad Dog Vachon….Live On Live Long my dude…

Michael Strahan is this weeks host???? Say whaaaaat?? I wanna shot at being a Raw host! Imagine that!!!

Why are the crowd chanting Daniel Bryan in this first segment??? GET OVER IT muthaf***az – Bryan was teefed, you want a switch up – you complain. Bryan and Orton feuded for 3 months – YOU said it was getting boring… to quote Mike Knoxxx: “WHY DO YOU WATCH WRESTLING???”

Looks like we are gonna get that title unification match a lot sooner than we anticipated!!! John Cena Vs Ladies Favourite Randall Orton in a TLC match at the TLC PPV in three weeks??? Suddenly TLC is already better than Survivor Series!!!

Straight away – who y’all backing??? I’m going for Randall all the way!!!!! You wanna know why? Because the Royal Rumble is coming. Now we know that the winner goes to WrestleMania to face one champion. There will no longer be 2. That also means that the Brand Extension is DEAD!!!!! What do you think of that Brand Extension fans???? YOU B!TCHES!!!!

Undertaker has a message for the Brand Extension:

Big ups to the Shield who brukk up the Rhodes Family and Rey Mysterio… Roman Reigns is STILL DA MAN!!! I see you IWC b!tches putting up debates on when the Shield gon break up…. I thought you wanted them to fight the Wyatt man dem???? Listen to yourselves!!!! Get out the basement and hit the gym…. d!ckheads!!!!

So hold up… if Michael Strahan is the guest on Miz TV and The Miz is the host, WHO is the host???? I don’t think the fans care here….

Makes a change that Titus O’Neill is actually wearing something sensible in a formGRANT - BODY - P of a suit…. not that pink brief sh!t that he and his partner be wearing!

Hold up – is The Miz challenging Strahan to a wrestling contest??? A wha de rarse??? OH SNAP – Strahan just did a hip toss on The Miz???? RAH-TID! Ok own up – how long did you practise that move in the Performance Center????

OH SNAP!!!!! Big E Langston and my hero Mark Henry tag team????? Whoever the opponent is – they DEAD!!!!! Oh it’s Axel and Ryback??? Oh dear they gon lose again!!!! I didn’t even hear their music hit!!!

Oh my days Henry & Langston straight killin em! Henry with the World’s Strongest Slam to Curtis Axel – BLAOW!!!!!! THATS WHAT I DO!!!!

We gonna have a rematch with the Total Divas Vs AJ Lee’s Divas???? So good like New York you gotta name it twice!!!! Mike Dogg wins again, you IWC b!tches LOSE!!!!

Guess what else is back other than Mark Henry: My chocolate pudding baby! Taste like Cameron & Naomi!

SAM_2311

I wanna see Eva Marie fight again!!! She better do a wrestling move this time!

Damn Tamina took out my Nubians ONE TIME!!! Before I could say ‘sweeeeeet!’

WHOA!!! JoJo eliminated Tamina????? BACKSIDE! Eva Marie eliminated Alicia Fox??? BACKFOOT!!!!

Brie Bella eliminated AJ????? I smell a fatal 4 way now!!! Natalya pinned her, so did Naomi!!!

OH NO! The crowd want Summer Rae to twerk it – twerk it!!!! That can’t be all she good fa! Bella Twins doing the worm… All they need is Kharma/Awesome Kong to join them and be the ‘Rikishi’ of the crew! That would be cool!!! (see what I did there???)

What I wanna know is, what is the difference between a street fight and a hardcore match???? Answers on a postcard please! Tweet answers @MZATheInfamous! Damien Sandow Vs Dolph Ziggler…. Backing Sandow here! Don’t let me down son!!!

Michael Cole – why the f**k did you say ‘shades of attitude era’ during this match??? You want the attitards to start reaching for their lower extremities and start pleasuring themselves???

Yes!!! My boy came through!!!! Sandow with the ‘You’re Welcome’ super move on Ziggler onto the trash can – BLAOW!!!! F**k you Ziggler fans! (people called him the next Shawn Michaels….IDIOTS!!! HAHAHA!!!)

Clearly Michael Strahan put that goat mask on and never realised he could be following the buzzards!!!! He fears NO MAN but GOD!!! Looked at the Wyatt dude as if to say – what’s up homes???!!!

I love that they give Renée Young ring time now…. as an announcer that is. She is so fine – OHHHHHH!! Front Way – Back way – Side way – I’d TEAR DAT @$$ UP!!!

I like this promo right here… every question Punk asks, Daniel Bryan & the crowd respond – YES! But the killer question he asked was ‘isn’t it ironic that we are asking the questions – and Renée Young is holding a microphone asking nothing?’ YES!!!!

I gotta question then – is Renée Young a sexy muthaf***a who needs a good f**k??? YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES!

Punk & Bryan Vs The Wyatt man dem – LET’S GO!!!

You know I’m watching this match…. and I’m beginning to think that these Wyatt mans aren’t as good as they are made out…. like their psychology is good with their gimmick and all that, but their wrestling skills are not as refined as The Shield…. you nah mean? Like their fighting style comes off as sloppy, or maybe that was the idea, sloppy -but effective.

Quote of the night from JBL: “The WWE Universe are very smart Michael (Cole), don’t underestimate them…” So THE GRANT SAYS – Why does the script writers write certain storylines and expect us to forget certain aspects of history????

It’s all gone buckwild and the ref just shut down the match… but watch da ride – the Wyatt man dem have taken Daniel Bryan away, while the Shield brukk up CM Punk!!! One year ago that would never happen! Triple Powerbomb through the canvas – BLAOW!!!!! Lawd have mercy – I have NO IDEA where this is going heading into TLC! How unpredictable was that??!!!

Oh hell to the naw!!!! the Miz out-wrestled Kofi Kingston twice??? CHU!!!! I’m tired as a muthaf***a… but the difference is – you lot can go to bed. I must continue entertaining my readers!!!!

YES!!! The Funkadactyls are back!!! This time with Xavier Woods!!! This is great!!! That’s why they got eliminated quickly earlier! But finally my girls come out with someone sensible… does this mean Albert and Broadus are future endeavoured???? I HOPE SO!!! Gwarn Xavier! Brukk up that idiot Slater! YES!!! THAT’S WHAT’S UP! Shout out to R-Trizzy!!!!

Yo that new DVD looks like a MUST HAVE in every wrestling fan’s collection! WWE 50 Year history… go COP THAT SH!T!!!!

WWE 50 Years

I bet Michael Strahan must be cussing in his mind when he had the Bellas, Funkadactyls and Eva Marie throwing their pu$$y at him… but then he turns round and sees Goldust!!!! NOOOOOOOOO! That dude scares me rude boy! All that segment needed was Ron Simmons to appear at the side……….

Damn

Good to see the WWE Universe have sense when they are ready, naming Stone Cold Steve Austin as The Rock’s greatest WrestleMania Rival…haha you gotta love WWE for keeping The Rock’s name in their mouth, sweetening him to appear at WrestleMania XXX!!! He will be there… to those who don’t think he will be there… just remember who I am: the chocolate pudding eating, diva loving, last true hip hop standing, sword swinging Infamous Informer!!!

Ok the main event that Strahan set up… Ladies favourite – Randall Orton and Referee Tonya’s favourite – Bertie Vs The Big Show and John Cena… a man who has earned even more of my respect since he gave Nikki Bella his moment of clarity on Total Divas!

Shout out to STC’s Lee Steadx – his ‘hatred’ for Cena had him write this on the Raw live thread:

“my fantasy raw ending would be taker coming down with a casket putting cena in it and nailing it shut!!”

With that one comment, that made me think – the WrestleMania XXX storylines are being written before our very eyes RIGHT NOW!

Bwoy too many blows in Big Show’s head side nearly had the ref stopping this match…. what a good thing Big Show tagged Cena in the 9th inning… Cena had Bertie tapping like a b!tch but Randall thought – f**k that and blasted Cena with the belt – BLAOW!!!!

I’m making this early prediction right now – based on Steadx’s vision – Randall will WIN the title unification match… which means either Punk or Bryan will win the Rumble – Cena will either fail or compete in a WWE Undisputed Championship. There is no purpose of the Elimination Chamber unless the WWE Undisputed title is defended… which leads to WrestleMania, where Cena will compete in a major match – not WWE title. Either against the Undertaker like Cena kinda wished for, or in another ‘dream’ match.

Now time to go in the booth on the BDSIR Network…

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#BIGSHOWKNOCKHIMOUT

#GWARNYUHBED

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE OR/AND THE SMACK TALK CENTRE.

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