Monday Night Raw #1112: September 15, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer

PEACE TO THE GODS & EARTHS! KNOWLEDGE, KNOWLEDGE, KNOWLEDGE, WISDOM.

85%ers… I just quoted Supreme Mathematics. Only the 5% know what I just did here. 10% IWC b!tches step back and continue eating your monosodium glutamate, and polysorbate and drunk grape concentrate, with sodium benzoate!

Sorry I’m a Champion, as we enter the Night of Champions! RAW #1112! Hol’Dat – BLAOW!

WWF PROPA TINGZNo messing about! Paul Heyman’s here! John Cena is here! Is Brock Lesnar here? because if not, it’s YO @$$ PAUL HEYMAN!!!! Cena said he will F**k you up!

Haha Heyman made Cena look fool!!!! Look at him! Waiting for Brock for a fight like a dyam arse! Well – Brock’s private jet is delayed – Cena – KICK HIS F**K!N @$$!!! Don’t wait til no halftime Cena – KICK HIS @$$! Why has Cena got Heyman in a headlock??? Stop this nonsense Cena! I’d be throwing fists and fire on Heyman! Hey I’m a big Heyman fan… but it’s like this – if Brock comes and f**ks you up Cena, it’s your fault… just like you let Nikki Bella freeze her eggs, when there are nuff man out there dying to be a father! They’d shoot up her club in a heartbeat!

Oh snap – GREAT BOOKING BY JOHN CENA!!! Heyman locked away in Cena’s locker room, guarded by the not so Great Khali! Remember back in the days? I think it was 2007 when the not so Great Khali tried to squeeze Cena’s head top and kill him? How times have changed…

Look at this… Chris Jericho Vs ‘Glenn’… did Mike Cole just call him the Big Red Monster? I see no monster, I see a big bumblehead fool in school trousers!

If my hero Kane wrestled as Jacob Goodnight… even Bray Wyatt would see his white trousers turn yellow! WWE Creative simply have no sense sometimes!

Great win for Jericho, another loss for Glenn. I love Kane, hate Glenn. CHU!!!

You mean to tell me Mark Henry has athletes sending video messages supporting him in his fight against Rusev? Oh man Mark best not let his people down… all this police brutality, all sorts of sh!t…. he got more weight on him than Wack Swagger, who is fighting against Bo Dallas… and I BO-Lieve Dallas can win!

I like that chant going on! WE-THE-PEOPLE – – – WE BO-LIEVE!!!! I BO-LIEVE!!!! Come on kid! You are an inspiration to us all!

Good adding on to his Arsenal… Bo Dallas putting hand on his heart saying – WE BO-LIEVE before coming off the top ropes! NICE! It’s a shame he didn’t connect with the knee drop though…

OH F**K – Dallas taps out to the Ankle Patriot lock…. DAMNIT…. no more victory lap for Dallas now…. B@$+@rd!!!

COMING NEXT! Brie & AJ Lee combine their force against Paige & Nikki! Who am I backing? I care not… Whoever Loses, I WIN! I wonder, is

The MAN in the PURPLE SUIT!this the part where Brie finds herself in the divas championship match???

F**K it – I hate this skipping sh!t! If I ever catch my baby girl skipping like its yellow brick road– our relationship is OVER!

Oh dear – Brie – you got no skills, or as my sis would say, Brie you got no barz! Your @$$ ain’t going in that title match! Paige with the Rampaige super move… Brie couldn’t get up after that…and then after the match Nikki Bella shuts Brie down with her torture rack super move – BLAOW!!!

I’m sorry Shadfather but the Great Khali could win star of the week here! I can’t believe Paul Heyman tried to escape out of the locker room to call his client… but Khali brukk up Heyman’s phone! Oh no! How is Heyman gonna tweet his followers???

Where is Vincent Kennedy when you need him? Mike Cole just did an epic fail – he called John Cena – The world’s largest athlete??? You got two choices Cole – BE FIRED or the alternative…. GET IN THE CHAIR!!!! Better than that – Where’s the Rock? So he can put his most electrifying T-Shirt over Cole’s foolish head top????

LAWWD have mercy! The Big Show! 7ft 2! The Big Show! 441lbs! Double chokeslammed The Wyatt Bwoy into the canvas – BLAOW! That should have went through the ring tuh blodclart!

Big up the Uso brudda! I like that these guys have had an incredible run with the tag titles… it took them so long to capture the titles and even I thought they would have dropped em sooner… more power to em!

Was that ANOTHER Epic Fail by Mike Cole? He just asked Jay-Bee and Lawler – ‘Did Cody just meow’??? I thought his name was Stardust??? I thought Cody Rhodes didn’t exist????? (Obviously in storyline terms IWC don’t get your dirty Y-Fronts in a twist!)

If Raw starts at 8pm EST, 1am UK, isn’t 9:30pm EST 2:30am UK HALFTIME???? Cena said if Brock doesn’t show up by half time Heyman will get f**ked up… well it’s halftime now!!! I see no Brock…. Cena – KICK HIS F**K!N @$$!!!!!

STC NOC BANNER The Uso Brudda, The Dust Brudda, Sheamus & Cesaro always put on great matches, if you not down with the Night of Champions card this Sunday… I’ll take that wrestling card!!!! Now go over there and watch the only way is Essex… you dumb rarse!

BORN DAY SHOUT OUT TO THE DON! THEODORE LONG!!!! SALUTE THIS MAN!!!! LOOK AT HIM… WHAT A PLAYA!

Theodore-Long-With-Renee Word on the street is that Jericho is leaving again after Night of Champions…. and the announcers are making a big deal out of Randall kicking Jericho in his head costing him a few months of his career…why have I got that feeling that Randall is gonna do it again???

OHHHHH HERE WE GO!!!! KICK HIS F**K!N @$$!!!!! GIVE HIM THE BEATING CM P**K CAN ONLY DREAM OF!

Don’t waste time Cena! Stop chat – drop 16 suplexes on his @$$! I don’t care if he’s a 49-year-old father of 2, I don’t care if he’s acting with the benefit of intellect…. KICK HIS @$$!!!

Even the crowd want you to whupp his @$$! oh no…. Heyman got in your head…. goddamnit!!!! HERE COMES THE PAIN! HERE WE GO!!!

After mad mind games…. you know Brock the Conqueror couldn’t resist… he got in the ring… one German Suplex – BLAOW! Cena is like – OH SNAP! But Brock turn his back give Cena, Next minute Cena rushes Brock! Fist and fire! left’s and rights! Is Nikki getting wet backstage??? Is she thinking – f**k this egg freezing sh!t, I’m gonna jump on his d!ck and my vaginal walls is gonna trap him!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

That’s it Mike Cole – give the kids hope, because come Night of Champions… the Conqueror, BRRROCK Lesnar… is gonna brukk up Cena’s clart! I call it the battle between Kenshiro and Raoh the Conqueror in Fist Of the North Star!

fist-of-the-north-star-kens-rage-2kenshiro_vs_raohSo Cameron isn’t going to NXT after all? She’s gonna fight Naomi right here and now…. excuse me while I shed tears….

Good style out by Cameron when she pinned Naomi’s breasts to the mat instead of her back for the pinfall! HA! HA! Girl you don’t need to go to NXT!!! But that Sasha Banks though…. She and Cameron would make a great team!

There’s chants for Naomi! while Cameron has improved her fighting style! What sort of submission was that from Naomi??? WHOA!!!! Everytime I see Naomi fight she adds another move to her style! Give this woman the belt NOW!!!!! Well let her fight the winner between AJ, Nikki and Paige first…

I heard about this – Ziggler got his stunt double…. R-Truth…. I am DISGUSTED. I have lost respect for R-Truth, wearing pink brief and shaking his @$$…. F**k this… I’m off to watch babestation…. I’m a fan of that Sophia Lares lady… good gawd almighty!

BwimvOlCEAAyBvu.jpg largeI’D GO GRANTINGTON STEELE UP IN DAT @$$!

Did Seth Rollins just make a racist gesture about Roman Reigns???? Acting like a gorilla and sh!t????!!! OH HELL NAWWW!! I didn’t think that was funny. Roman – F**K him up!!! He might as well have said, Roman, I’m coming for you n!**@!

So wait there… if we are getting Seth Rollins Vs Roman Reigns now… does that mean at Night of Champions they will fight again in a stipulation??? I hope that is so!

F**K it Roman – get disqualified – Rollins made a racist comment about you and your Samoan heritage… send for the steel chair and beat his backside!

Oh blast – a victory by Reigns in a straight up wrestling contest…. GOD DAMNIT…. I HATE WRESTLING MATCHES!!! Only joking! I just think that when stars cut a promo where they say certain things about their opponent, I expect that sh!t to be delivered you feel me?

Interesting booking by WWE – Rusev & Mark Henry segment last???? Why is this? Is Mark Henry gonna strip Lana naked or something? (PG GRANT) GOD DAMNIT!!!! Lana would be crazy in TV-14 mode! She is Debra 2.0.! Let the truth be told! She has mastered d!ck teasology 101!

GRANT BODY – P!

The question remains – will the crowd support Mark Henry like they did Wack Swagger? You dun know me, Mike Knoxxx and Spotface will be watching this closely…

As much as I love the ‘What?’ chant…. the crowd doing this against the man who is supposed to be supporting the States?

Oh no! Lana put Mark Henry on blast!!!! He failed in the 1992 Olympic games! And Lana showed the true champion he represented Russia! OH SNAP!!! Dayuuum Henry how you gonna come back from this?

By pledging allegiance to the flag???? Well yeah but NO! Rusev tries to attack Henry!!! But Check it – Rusev, tries for the Accolade super move! Henry fights out of it! Sets up Rusev – Sit out chokeslam – BLAOW!!! Is that a new super move???? I hope so! He’s gonna need it! Henry made a promise to not let his people down! YES!!!! THAT’S WHAT I DO!!!!! I need to send for my Mark Henry shirt on Sunday and represent!!!!

OFFICIAL STC ANTHEM FOR NIGHT OF CHAMPIONS: SKYZOO – LIKE A SHOTGUN

#VOCAREADREGNUM!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#GWARNYUHBED

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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