Monday Night Raw #1156, July 20, 2015!!!

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FOR REAL??? FOR REAL?????? The Don of DONS???!!!! The last time Undertaker made a crazy return like that was Judgment Day 2000. Crowd went nuts. Now, to those select few who booed that moment because they wanted to see a traditional title match… first off, SHUT THE F**K UP. Second. SHUT THE F**K UP. Third, WRESTLING IS STORYLINE. I would do the knowledge for you now but I won’t get into that – wait until this week’s STC From The UK show on BDSIR NETWORK.

Suddenly Summerslam is gonna be OFF THE HOOK! I am him – Infamous Informer – Wolverhampton’s Last Outlaw – The man in The Purple Suit – Grant Body – P!! RAW #1156: HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZFOR REAL VIRGIN MEDIA? You know my boy is on, and you just gonna cut me off like that? Here’s my £53.55 muthaf***a – now go and get yourself some chips with yo’ broke @$$!

SOURCE: WWE.COM / YOUTUBE

OOOOH SH!T!!!!! THE DON OF DONS IS HERE! Talk about breaking the 11th Commandment, Brock Lesnar broke the streak – THE ULTIMATE HOLY GRAIL. Shattered people’s childhoods… to this present day, my fellow Undertaker fans will not let it burn… maybe they have a reason.. because Undertaker gonna use fist and fire to f**k up Brock & Paul Heyman!

I knew Heyman should have shut the f**k up after last year’s WrestleMania… I knew it… I tried to warn him…

It’s only logical right? Ever since the streak brukk… NO ONE CAN BEAT HIM… and since Rollins never pinned Lesnar, since Reigns never became that guy as originally intended, It’s down to ONE MAN to conquer the conqueror… the Don of DONS himself!

MAN OR BEAST: YOU WILL REST IN PEACE!!!

Granted no one asked for this rematch but when you do the knowledge it was YOU THE FANS who wanted certain things, and with that…. Lesnar’s blood is in YOUR HANDS!SAM_3844

We got team B.A.D. (My team…) Team Bella (just supporting the 300 days… we still going y’all!!!) so.. er… what’s your team Paige? Don’t tell me it’s Team Paige??? YO Charlotte, Becky… TALK TO YO GIRL!!!

Haha Brie on that Yes! Kick flex! She might as well have all of Danny’s move set because we won’t be seeing him for a while! At least Danny said he WILL return… Wrestling fans – GET YOUR SH!T RIGHT – DON’T BELIEVE EVERY WEBSITE YOU READ FOOL!

Damn Brie??? Is Sasha that fine that you gotta blow a kiss to her??? I mean I don’t blame you but Danny don’t get down like that…. BUT I DO!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Damn That figure 8 super move will f**k up a b!tch real quick!!!! Congratulations Charlotte… I don’t think Brie can give birth after that!

I GOT IT! That team will be Team IWC B!tches!!! It makes sense! That’s the team the IWC will back in general. They ‘hate’ the Bellas, they could care less about Naomi/Tamina/not so much Sasha… so that’s where the ‘brothers’ come in! We like ALL the women, (Paige not so sure) but we WILL BACK THE BOSS! We WILL BACK THE SNUKA LEGACY! we WILL BACK NAOMI’S @$$ UP!

FOR REAL PTP??? You mean you defeated the New Day at Battleground but cannot best Los Matadores? Do you realise what you’ve done? Los Matadores get a title shot at your @$$£$! And the New Day are laughing and doing the two-step about it!

Good call by WWE to take off the I.C. title match to showcase the divas, and put Big Show Vs The Miz on Raw instead on RAW….

Wait a minute…. no…..NO!!!! That’s 500lbs of steaming monkey crap on the top ropes!!! Miz get outta there! Think about your family!! Maryse!!! cover your eyes! Elbow drop off the top ropes by the Big Show – BLAOW!!!!!! I don’t ever recall Big Show ever doing that…. EVER!!!!!!

Big Show says he’s going to Tough Enough to punch all the contenders (minus the laydeez) through school buses!!! THE GRANT SAYS – Those who got eliminated early are the lucky ones!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Oh sh!t – Paul Heyman has chosen not to shut the f**k up! And you know what? That is a GOOD THING! Nothing like listening to one of the promo kings of this sh!t! Wait til WWE put together the promo vid for this, or rather, wait til DELBUSTO puts it together!

YOU CAN SELL YOUR SOUL TO THE DEVIL, BUT YOUR @$$ BELONGS TO BROCK LESNAR!!!

Holy sh!t!!!! I think the creative team got it right this time!

Look at Heyman’s face!!! (0:45) Damn that is mean!!!!!

OH SH!T!!!!! What happened to your mean mug Heyman???!!! The Undertaker gonna f**k you up after all that sh!t talking!!

PLEASE! I HAVE CHILDREN!!!

Do you realise Paul I am cracking up at my university right now!!! How does Undertaker keep a straight face???!!!

BECAUSE HE’S THE UNDERTAKER!!

(BROCK’S MUSIC HITS) Wait a minute – Mike Cole – JBL – you supposed to call the action! Not run off! I’m tweeting Vincent Kennedy right now!!! (Or maybe not… I’d do the same thing! ME GARNE!!!)

SH!T! Triple Teef is bringing the security!!! LET THEM FIGHT!!! THIS IS PERSONAL!!!

THE UNDERTAKER! BROCK LESNAR!!! BEATING DOWN THE SECURITY! MUTHAF**K!!!!!

The Security is not enough! Triple Teef! Calling for the locker room!

How the f**k did Brock escape all those stars and get The Undertaker like that!!! Yo this is one of those moments where I want the Undertaker to soar over the ring!!!!

BROCK: I’M GONNA KILL YOU!

UNDERTAKER: YOU GONNA HAVE TO!

…and Virgin Media denied me of watching this???? What was that Nathan Webb? Undertaker should retire??? GET IN THE CHAIR!!!

GOOD GAWD ALMIGHTY! JR WOULD HAVE BEEN ALL OVER THAT SEGMENT RIGHT THERE!!!

Now back to normality – (if you can call it that…) It’s the Wyatt man dem Vs The Shield Part II…Ladies favourite Roman Reigns Vs Luke Harper… Wyatt ain’t got his rocking chair no more, Ambrose at Ringside. Just shows how wrestling fans love to read – getting angry at WWE doing Brock Vs Roman Reigns as the main event… hahahaah you b!tches! Wyatt is still on that ‘Anyone But Reigns’ deal… so with that said, who is gonna be Seth Rollins opponent at Summerslams???

This wrestling contest has turned into a brawl as well! Come on Triple – get in there – call the Calvary!!!

Er…. John Cena???? UH-OHHHH!!! I like this!!!! I bet the IWC hate it!!! Calling it now – Champion Vs champion – Winner Takes All, which means that Cesaro won’t get pushed… ohh BOO-HOO!!! SHUDDUP!!! Ooooooh who shall I back??? Maybe I should back Cena…. go for the 2nd Ultimate Holy Grail – 16 TIME WORLD CHAMPION!!! Imagine that!!!

#WhoeverLosesIWIN!

Time for more laydeez action! Team IWC b!tches Vs Team B.A.D.! Where’s my purple suit…

The MAN in the PURPLE SUIT!

Come on Team B.A.D. Show them how to do it! The Grant Says, I think they should make Team W.A.M. consisting of Natalya, Layla and…er let me think… Emma maybe? initials stand for W.hat About. Me!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Did Becky just try a RVD Rolling Thunder to tag Paige and it epic failed??? HAHAHAHA! COME ON SASHA!!!

Sasha hits the Back Stabber, goes in to the Bank Statement submission move locked in on Paige! TAP YOU B!TCH!!!! TAP!

YES!!!! That’s my girl!!!! Where’s your revolution now Paige? Ha! Team IWC B!tches!!!

(Note: I got love for Charlotte & Becky Lynch… not sure if I like Becky’s surname….)

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Maybe you gotta hold fire on the main event for Summerslam Grant… you got Kevin Owens, Sheamus and Rusev Vs Cena, Cesaro, and Randall in 6 man tag team action… lets see where this goes…

OH SNAP!!! Owens knocks Sheamus off the apron! Sheamus don’t like that sh!t! He’s like f**k you Owens! I’m taking this briefcase and going to my yard! Ha – kids!!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Owens got no one to tag because Summer Rae suck!n Rusev d!ck!!!

OH MY GOD THAT IS ENOUGH!!!

Oh dear!! Owens don’t like that Rusev was getting hed at ringside and kicks him down! Suddenly the words FINISH HIM! Arise over Rusev’s head… OHHH SH!T!!!

WTF – I didn’t notice that Summer Rae was biting Lana’s clothing! Summer Rae wants to rock the blouse & skirt??? Looks nice but your body is not tight like Lana!!!

Did you perverts get another shot of Lana’s panties??? Damn… I pity you wrestling fans!

…and Lana fixing her blouse & skirt after she fights…. I LOVE IT!

Cena hit the AA/FU on Rusev! Cesaro, picks up Rusev by the legs and swings him around! Catapult into the RKO – BLAOW!!!! RUSEV DEAD NOW!!

Did you like that wrestling fools? Cesaro in the main event is like a British Heatwave – make the most of that sh!t now – it only lasts two days!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

…and Undertaker & Brock are STILL FIGHTING!!! Oh man this has to be some unsanctioned sh!t by WWE for Summerslam! You can’t possibly tell me that they can book them in a normal @$$ singles match??? This is FIGHT TO THE DEATH!!!!

Now Triple H… Don’t do anything stupid like drop a Zero Tolerance clause on this sh!t… mind you it would work for Undertaker… GOOD GAWD ALMIGHTY!!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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