Monday Night Raw #1211, August 8, 2016!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

DON’T GIVE ME JOKE!

So Puff Daddy is producing the soundtrack for the new game… I saw the track listing and it looks like this:

  • Action Bronson & Joey Bada$$ (feat. Rico Love) – “What About The Rest Of Us”
  • Anderson .Paak – “Come Down”
  • Andy Black – “We Don’t Have To Dance”
  • Axwell Λ Ingrosso – “This Time”
  • Black Sabbath – “Paranoid”
  • Bring Me The Horizon – “Run”
  • FIDLAR – “Drone”
  • French Montana (feat. Kojak Black) – “Lockjaw”
  • iSHi (feat. French Montana, Wale, & Raekwon) – “We Run”
  • P. Diddy, Black Rob & Mark Curry – “Bad Boy For Life”
  • Travis Barker & Yelawolf – “Out of Control”
  • Twenty One Pilots – “Ride”
  • Yellow Claw (feat. Lil Eddie) – “We Made It”

THE GRANT SAYS: Four things – 1, I’m interested to hear the Anderson Paak track. 2, I can confirm that the Action Bronson track ‘What About The Rest Of Us’ is a great track which was played on our very own RePPiN4U HIP HOP SHOW. 3, Wu-Tang fans gonna be mad as f**k when they find out Raekwon has collaborated with Wale & French Montana, not the first time Raekwon has sought commercial appeal, and 4 – Bad Boy 4 Life is automatically the best tune on the soundtrack! AND THAT’S THE TRUTH!

GRANT BODY-P!

In other news: Did you see the Rio Olympic opening ceremony? Or more importantly – Did you see ANITTA?!!! The Grant Says – JENNIFER LOPEZ – MOVE YUH BACKSIDE! FIGURATIVELY  AND LITERALLY!

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RAW 1211! Why don’t they let the Infamous Informer do the hip hop side of the soundtrack and a rock soundtrack by a STC Member???

WWF PROPA TINGZ

What’s 10x better than a 20-minute promo by Triple TEEF? A 20 minute promo by Enzo & Cass! Now I feel sorry for Enzo here, because he was bussin skillz with Sasha last week…. then next minute we find out she got married! Sasha that’s cold baby girl!

Yes you cannot please everybody… I see a select few who are not feeling these two! I say HAND IN YOUR WRESTLING CARD! You attitards mean to tell me that you love everything that Road Dogg & Billy Gunn did back then but don’t rate this? YOU ARE THE PROBLEM. SERIOUSLY. GIVE ME YOUR CARD. YOU’RE DONE.

What we are seeing are four guys in Enzo & Cass, Jericho & Owens with top-notch mic skills! They are most likely to clash at the Summerslam joint!

Reading the twitter feed while  Jericho and Enzo are settling ‘It’, that is a good name – ‘JeriKO’… I can ride to that but only for this feud right here. I don’t want them to team for the long haul as Kevin Owens is too good for that. If he does I will compl… wait.. I’m NOT THAT GUY… I DON’T DO DRUGS!

The question remains – is Kevin Owens aware that Puff Daddy is in the building? Answers on a postcard please or tweet me @MZATheInfamous!

Jericho – how long have you been in the game – a good 20 years at best right? So why you thought you won when you clearly didn’t hear Enzo tap or the ref call that he passed out?

They say Big Cass had ‘no choice’ but to kick down Jericho… er yes he did…. Kevin Owens was interfering, so would it not make sense for Big Cass to kick down Kevin Owens????

OH NO! Rusev is gonna rub it in to the 40-year-old virgins of the WWE Universe that he’s banging Lana on a regular now he’s put a ring on it! If I was Rusev I’d rub it in too, and wish them another 40 years of getting no pu$$y!

GRANT BODY-P!

While Braun Strowman beats on another CAW from WWE2K17, I’ll take this time to talk about my newest crush, the Brazilian singer Anitta… see this gir….. what the match finish already? Oh OK! I’ll promise you guys a pic of this chick who in my opinion is out to dethrone J-LO!

Wait a minute – Puff Daddy is inviting Mick Foley & The Family to the Bad Boy Tour??? Mick got good taste in music – he asked if Faith Evans gonna be there! YES MICK you just scored points from me! Just for you, here’s one of my favourite Faith Evans tunes!

When this tune used to drop in the club back in the day, your Infamous Informer would brukk out! Women would challenge him on the dance floor… aaaah the memories…

Darren Young & Titus O’Neill are fighting again so I’ll continue my stories of my past clubbing career… I remember my ex from Preston… she said to me after the club that while I disappeared to the big man’s room, women approached her and told her how ‘lucky’ she was she got me… Well THE GRANT SAYS – all you women lose because I long retired from the clubbing scene and I have a woman who loves me as much as I love her! Go back to your ‘bad boys and wannabe thugs’ who treat you wrong because that’s what you like right???

GRANT BODY-P!

Finally – someone worth watching! The Great Seth Rollins!

Er yeah Seth – Finn Balor is right – you was playing Pokemon Go, (and maybe taking selfies of your todger) while everybody else had to fight for the spot… suddenly I’m not feeling this promo… I know he’s supposed to get me invested in his fight with Finn Balor but.. I dunno Seth! Try again kid!

Sheamus Vs Cesaro???? Did we have this match like – last week? YES WE DID! Oh lawwd… Mick Foley you are slipping on your commissioner skills!

So while they fight let me hit you off with the Smack Talk Centre’s official theme for Summerslam, a lot better than that Flo-Rida crap let me tell ya!

I love both Sheamus and Cesaro.. but it’s like, fans say they could watch Sami Zayn & Kevin Owens feud for months… I can’t say the same for these two…

Oh man they have built this contest good eh? Randall Vs Brock Lesnar… it’s true, there’s no history between the two other than they trained at OVW, and they both became the youngest World Wrestling Federation champion… Brock is right – Randall ain’t sh!t compared in terms of accomplishments, don’t forget – Brock did what Randall failed to do at WrestleMania, but let’s not get into that! That alone puts Brock in a league of his own. Brock is a machine, but Randall has voices in his head which makes him borderline psycho… what do you think guys?!!!

Can’t lie to ya – these wrestling matches are boring me this week… just thrown together, some of them are repeats from last week… no storyline or nothing…taht’s not like me – normally I find a positive outlook on RAW… perfect time to talk about my new crush – Anitta…

See here I was watching the Rio Olympics opening ceremony, when suddenly this woman graces my screen… when I tell you my jaw dropped and my Johnson stood at attention…

anitta-fala-sobre-ter-cantado-nas-olimpiadas

I thought – what a sexy gyal! WHAT A WOMAN! Then I took to YouTube and Twitter to find out more… YO THIS GYAL IS BAAAAAAAAAAAD PEOPLE! This woman can and will end your career if she twerks on you!

Ok this segment should give me the most joke! Let’s get back to Infamous Informer mode with this wedding ceremony between Rusev & Lana Machka!

Lana’s wedding dress though!!! she’s not supposed to show that much leg is she???? Hey I’m not complaining!

The question remains – will those two terrible singers come out to sing like they did for Triple and Stephanie?! Answers on a postcard please!

Rub it in guys! I’m just waiting for Roman Reigns to f**k it all up!

OH SNAP – The crowd chanting BORING!!!!! Oh my days!!! Yo Roman where you at rude boy?

Wait a minute – Roman Reigns gonna be the Best Man? Hold up – you know what that Best Man film is about don’t you???

Where has Reigns got these super mic skills from??? This is what I mean! Let Roman be Roman!!! He’s throwing shots left and right here!!!!

Rusev can’t take this sh!t – he goes and attacks Reigns! And look what happen – Rusev bumps into Lana and her face meets the wedding cake! NOW she looks magically delicious!

GRANT BODY-P!

Ok this is what I came to see! Sasha, Dana Brooke, Charlotte, you three sexy @$$£$ steal the show! Show dem how fi do it!Grant BODY RIO

Confirmed – Charlotte was champ for 309 days and never made a big deal about it…

See I would have seen the match, but my woman called me.. oh well, I could turn off RAW at this point, but NO… I don’t half @$$ my blogs to you wonderful people!

WROOOOOOOY!!!! OK that’s the best segment on RAW this week – Finn Balor’s promo on Seth Rollins, breaking down the legend of his name!!! Now THAT is how to get invested!!! Followed by another video promo by the Bullet Club who have ow discovered an epidemic called ‘ringpostitis’… LADIES! You do not want a man who suffers from that condition!

Even with Big E down, that doesn’t stop The New Day’s power of positivity… well apart from Luke Gallows… oh no they gonna give Kofi Kingston a case of RingPostItis – but Xavier Woods is like – f**k that – I will beat this chair into your chrome dome! (no chair shots to the head Grant) FOR REAL? Well kick the Bullet Club in their cratches then!

Yes, RAW wasn’t supposed to focus on the GMs, but Vincent Kennedy did also say – ‘even if you break the law’, and the crowd seem to love Danny Bryan!

I don’t get it – why would Rusev interrupt this segment right here? He looks dressed to fight! He can’t crush Danny Bryan? Has he gone insane? Cesaro – you are going about this the wrong way! Yes you would get a championship opportunity if you beat Sheamus last week, but the US TITLE was not what the IWC had in mind!!!!

Talking of Sheamus – he tried to teef!!! Cesaro hit the neutralizer super move but the ref was down! Cesaro had the match won!

Sheamus f**ked it up for Cesaro… well the Grant says.. RAW was boring this week, slow-paced, I thought Sasha, Dana and Char- Roman Reigns with a spear to Rusev at the end of the match – BLAOW!!!!

Ok as I was saying… RAW only started to get better 2.5 hours later in the show… that’s not good enough cretins! The quicker you get your cruiser weight jump off going the better.

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.

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