Monday Night Raw #1270 , October 2, 2017!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

I was watching Sky Sports News earlier, I am pleased to say that the dastardly Triple TEEF was sitting well away from my Natalie Sawyer… maybe he knew better because she is temptation incarnate with those…..BRRRRRREASSSSSTSSSS!!!!

However he did say that Ronda Rousey would like the opportunity and he would ‘give it to her’… SURE YOU WOULD TRIPLE!

GRANT BODY-P!

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REQUEST TO JOIN – DON’T BE A POTATO! DON’T BE A TRAGEDY like Stephen Paddock. He’s the biggest b!tch walking God’s Green Earth – he looks like an overgrown 60+ year old ogre who has never seen pu$$y, so he had to kill over 50 innocent people in Las Vegas. Where are Danerys dragons when you need them so this muthaf***a can get burned alive?

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RAW 1270! WHEN DID ROMAN REIGNS PASS THE HATE BATON TO ENZO AMORE? Was it that time he kicked him off the bus?

Steph Raw

Hold up – before we talk about this wrestling sh!t – apparently movie star Bradley Cooper is looking to star in a biopic playing as Vincent Kennedy!!! I hope they don’t run the scene where he met Linda and on the first date he had a realllllly good time…. in the back seat of the 1969 Cherviolet Impala!

GRANT BODY-P!

Holy snap! No Michael Cole? Maybe RAW will be great this week!

I completely forgot about all this sh!t – Seth Rollins Vs BRAUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!! he might be the Kingslayer buy can he slay the monster among men?

Braun is that over with the crowd that even with a fan favourite in Seth Rollins the crowd want Braun to f**k him up! Not only did he f**k up Seth, he got Deano too with the running powerslam – BLAOW!!!

Bad enough The Shield are f**ked up… but The Bar act like they cashed in their Money In The Bank contract for the tag team championships!

So this is how they gonna run it – take the p!$$ out of Mickie James age? You know she’s only what – she’s my age actually! Me and Mickie would have attended the same school – maybe even the same class! But I said it last week and I will say it now – Garth Brooks & Wu-Tang don’t mix!

GRANT BODY-P!

I know Nia is the sexiest muthaf***a on RAW but we gotta give it up to Mickie James this week…

Mickie james

Look at Alexa Blitch rubbing it in as Mickie is getting buss arse by Nia…. man I would love to get one of my sisters to f**k Alexa up!

HOLY SMOKES – Mr Motormouth now has nothing to say! NO BARS! I said it to you before Enzo – Take your WWE cruiserweight wages and remove the Wu-Tang tattoo off your arm. You are not worthy of it and The Saga Continues without you. (see what I did there?)

Just to be clear – I don’t hate you Enzo – in fact far from it… but you have to pay penalties yo…

Mickie James gets title shot against Alexa Bliss at the TLC joint! YES! Gonna be interesting either way – with Asuka’s debut at the PPV!

While Jason Jordan & Matt Hardy are fighting The Balding Club, I just wanna give a shout out to @majorpaiger1 on twitter – SoulNSports first lady…. like dayuum girl you are cute! If I was 10 years younger….

Conversely – Shout out to STC and fellow JAMMS co host – Joanne Chapman… If this was about 8 years ago – girl – I would be ALL OVER YOU!

GRANT BODY-P!

Just letting you know – The Infamous Informer is a faithful man… I love my real life first lady. Not talking about Naomi now – My true first lady. Temptation is everywhere… but the north got everything under control!

Er wait – The Balding Club WON?!!!! WHOA!!! I wasn’t paying attention! there I was chatting away about beautiful women and the everyday battle to fight off infidelity!

NO!!!! The Miztourage are doing The Shield’s entrance! They are coming down the stairs! they can’t do that!!!! TEEEEEEEEEEF!!!!

They lucky Dean and Seth are too brukk up to do anything!

Double R is straight up f**k!n up the MizTourage! They won’t be coming down the stairs again!

There is no way The Miz can win! Even if he takes the belt and tries to run – Double R gonna catch him!

It’s gonna take like 5 Skull Crushing Finale’s to put away Double R! You saw what happened at No Mercy! Cena dropped 4 FUs – one of them being the super FU off the top ropes!

Wait a minute – The Bar assaulting Double R for no reason! This has to trigger The Shield now surely!

The Miz and The Bar did the ultimate supermove – hit the triple powerbomb on Roman Reigns – BLAOW!

Calling it now – The Bar/Miz Vs The Shield in a TLC Match – that’s the main event right there!

“Abigail is alive, and she is dying to meet you”… and you can hear her laughing and sh!t….

Er… UH-OH! Bray Wyatt has finally given me something to look forward to!

I think Enzo Amore has found his voice again… and for the second week running, he’s the last segment…

WHOA! He just told the Cruiserweight division to go to hell!GRANT WWDJC2

WHOA! If any cruiserweight touches Enzo – this time they get FIRED????

Looks like Neville wants to be fired!!! In fact 205 Live could end right here!

Oh snap he took a shot at Corey Greaves! Oh man – I’m waiting for BRAUUUUUUUUUN! to come out!

Maybe not – Kurt might just reverse the decision! HERE WE GO!

Er – Kalisto got the shot!!! The clause doesn’t apply to him! Now all eyes on Kalisto! He got the entire cruiserweight division on his shoulders!

Aaaaah sheeeeeeeet! Double R says nothing, Deano says nothing, Rollins says nothing… it might be that time to suit up gents!

 

JAMMS

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DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE OR/AND THE SMACK TALK CENTRE.