Monday Night Raw #1296, March 26, 2018!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!


Cena disrespect

I’ve never known anyone who wants to be put in a box so badly! Hey this could end up being a good ol’ casket match at WrestleMania! (A part of me DOES NOT want the American BadAss… I’m sorry I’m a phenom guy!) But hey – seeing Undertaker FULL STOP gonna make me mark the f**k out!


REQUEST TO JOIN – DON’T BE A POTATO! DON’T BE A TRAGEDY like…Joe Cronin. YEAH I SAID IT. This man was getting red in his face saying WWE held back Danny Bryan to push Roman Reigns! Er Joe… may I remind you that Danny ALREADY won title BEFORE DOUBLE R??? YOU WASSACK!

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RAW 1296! “I’VE CHISELED YOUR TOMBSTONE… SLEEP WELL!!” (W.Krauser, Fatal Fury 2, 1992)

Eat, Sleep, Pace Up and Down while Paul Heyman chats, get paid, REPEAT! EASY MONEY like his name was John Connor, hacking the WWE payroll!!!

Even Paul Heyman is down with the Double R music! STC’s Callum Pattison invented that!

OH SNAP! Double R is eating his words ain’t he? Heyman just said Reigns is advertised and he’s not showing up!!! OH NO!!! Double R DID say he would be here every week!

Hang on – Double R is HERE! He’s not eating sh!t!

Reigns is bringing the pain with the steel chair but it’s not enough! Brock is 100%! Reigns is not!

Brock brought the suplexes, steel chairs and steel steps! Nah f**k that –

F5 on the STEEL STEPS – BLAOW!!!! This cannot be your usual wrestling match at WrestleMania surely???

Oh my days! More ruckus ahead! John Cena Vs Kane – NO DQ! Oh boy…

That’s f**ked up – Does Mickie James NOT come out to her cheesy music anymore?

Triple Teef and Stephanie really think all this training they’re doing is gonna help them defeat Ronda Rousey at the big WrestleMania? Take Kurt out of the equation! Watch this – they can’t handle Ronda – Stephanie gonna send for the hammer!

“We are gonna humble Ronda Rousey, the way we have humbled every other superstar…”


Cedric Alexander Vs Mustafa Ali for the cruiserweight championship at the big BIG WrestleMania! Backing Cedric… that is all!

Wait a second – did Miz TV feature Seth Rollins & Finn Balor a few weeks ago?

Oh dear The Miz is bex with the Miztourage! If I was Bo Dallas and Curtis Axel I would have rushed The Miz and beat out his blodclart!

Oh no! Seth speaks the truth! He got the crowd chanting Miztourage! Miztourage has been saving The Miz’s clart for the longest!

Miz telling more lies! He would still be intercontinental Champion!

Is Bo Dallas finally growing a set of balls? “You are a phony A-Lister who cannot fight!”

The Miz has TRULY DONE IT NOW!He just said he’s a better champion than Mr Perfect! DISRESPECT!!!!

OH NO! The Miz played Rollins & Balor! The Miztourage just used all that anger and turmed it into motivation!

Jamie Frost? She’s kinda hot still! Too bad she wasn’t ready for that Asuka Strong style Kung Fu! ONE KICK – BLAOW!!!

You really think Matt Hardy can delete a quarter of the roster in that Andre The Giant Battle Royal??? He can’t use lawnmowers, drones, none of that sh!t!

Er what? Sasha and Bayley in the women’s battle royal! You see – once again you wrestling fans never listen to the superior intellect of the Infamous Informer – they are not in a singles match like you said they would be… I told you – the card is NOT BIG ENOUGH! But again what do I know… I’m not Dave Meltzer, I’m not the 434, I’m not even Kayfabe News! Yep, I’m just the Infamous Informer…

Technically shall we back Sheamus so that we can find out who Braun Strowman’s tag team partner is gonna be? That’s all Sheamus has to do – beat Braun! Look – we’re not gonna find out til big BIG WrestleMania… it will either be mark out moment or complain on the internet moment…

I know – why don’t you guys search your beloved dirt sheets? Tweet Dave! I’m sure he’ll tell ya…. WOLLIES!


Big BIG WrestleMania 34

Baddest woman on the planet… badder than my moms???? I DON’T THINK SO! Ronda Rousey might be badd in bed??!!!!!

Rousey might be ready… but is Kurt??!!!! He better be!

Ronda looks like she hasn’t had any sleep! Is she ready for this WWE schedule though? Oh no – what’s that ugly Paige doing out here?

Oh Ronda – break that ugly b!tch’s arm! I don’t care if she’s injured!

Ronda Rousey got a mean Sean Price punch of her own! Sonya Deville felt that – P!!!

She gonna break Mandy Rose arm!!! And a lot of guys hearts in the process!!! Good thing Kurt jumped in there!!!!

Hmmmm.. this match is the main event… ok I’m nervous… it’s no DQ… is Cena gonna go off the rails and beat down Kane? Are the lights gonna go out and Kane disappears and what’s left are the gloves, hat and coat in the middle of the ring? That would be OFF THE HOOK!

The crowd is chanting for the Don of Dons!!! Oh man I have a very crazy feeling about this!!!

Cena sat up like The Undertaker!!! DISRESPECT! It’s bad enough when Brock did it…

WHAAAAT! Cena with a Chokeslam to Kane!!!! NOOOOOOOOOO!!! You might as well send for the casket Cena! You might as well start riding motorbikes! Trade in Machine Gun Kelly for Limp Biskit!


That’s what you get for disrespect – thrown through the table!!!

Cena dropped the AA on Kane through the table!!!! The Internet will not like this!!!

I think frustration is setting in for Cena! Maybe this IS the mind game Undertaker is playing – just not answer Cena at all and get him rattled!

Seems like it’s working! Still no Undertaker! Cena tryna put the don of dons on a guilt trip! that if he doesn’t show up next week, he’s let us all down! All the chanting, all the admiration… hey, sounds like somebody else don’t you think folks????