Author Archives: Jon P

About Jon P

Currently run www.cageamateursuk.com which is a combat sport website.

The Jobber Blogger #107 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 22/5/14

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The Jobber Blogger

This might be a first, it is currently 1:42am, and I am settling in for Writing up The Jobber Blogger. Yes, it’s late, I know. I do like the routine of Writing this up by Sunday at the latest and then it’s ready to go as soon as Impact airs in the UK. Though for those unaware, it is Half Term time…. in May. When the hell did this happen? I don’t remember ever having so much time off when I was in school. They’ve only just gone back from Easter! Weeks, that’s all it’s been and now the bloody kids are off again and I have to work more! Though in turn they are keeping me employed by actually…. turning up and creating business. Without the holidays my work would be rather quiet indeed!

And no, it’s not a camp, or weird Children related industries. It’s a Cinema, sure I’ve mentioned that before. Who cares.

Impact is same old same old this week, and no that’s not a “bad” thing…. it’s just not a great thing.

It’s different enough to feel different, and that is a good thing. Impact Wrestling

TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 22/5/14

One would hope that The Jobber Blogger will be up on time next week, but hey, not enough of you send this around for it to be a job! That’s a joke… I don’t think I can get paid by ranting about Wrestling shows…. what’s that, you can?

Well I’m probably not at “that” level, I like things my way, and to hell with talking about the show and reviewing the show and giving things Ratings. Stupid, irrelevant, pointless. Opinions! That’s what matters, mine isn’t better than yours, but I wrote my down, so suck it.

One thing TNA has been doing lately to piss me off, is the use of Kazarian. It seems it’s becoming a tradition to send out your Stars the worst possible way. AJ Styles, big title push, kick him off the show, bring him back, screw him over. Sting, sent out in a equally humiliating manor. Kurt Angle, injured at every step. And now, Kazarian, who had to job to Knux, run around Crazy Steve, and this week, the show kicked off with MVP, Lashley and King arriving. Kaz was on the phone with a “hang on Chris” which was a nice little touch, then he got beat up by Kenny King. Was that Kazarian’s last ever bit of work for TNA, getting beaten up for looking at a black guy. I’m going to miss Bad Influence, and hey, I’m not stranger to Ring of Honour, but we already know Christopher Daniels is going back with a “mystery” tag partner, who we all guess is Kazarian, so if they both turn up, I’m going to watch….. probably.

So MVP, Lashley and King kick off Impact, I do wish they didn’t push this little opening. They didn’t really explain any motivations for their “Heel turn” aside from just – Money, Power, Respect.

I don’t think having each of them take it in turn to talk about themselves and why they did what they did really achieved anything. But hey, been there done that storyline, why make anything else different?

I like a good Heel turn as much as the next guy, but what I like better is when it doesn’t need to be for reasons, that require said individual to walk out in the opening of the next show and explain why he isn’t a sell out.

Lots of ass-kissing, visionary this, money power that, a mention of “Dat Paper” later and The Wolves come out to confront MVP.

Now if The Wolves were aligned would have been cool, but then of course it would be better if they were black. Again, not in a racist manor, but I think that’s cool, I like that.

The Wolves did the usual “we looked up to you”, thankfully a good mention of “once they were like brothers” was not in the script. Though it was mentioned later on between Davey and Eddie themselves, don’t think I didn’t spot that, TNA.

MVP called Davey, Eddie, not sure if that was a joke or not, or just a plain human error… I chuckled a little, though if it was the other way round and Davey called MVP, Kenny by accident.. well that’s just a whole different level of BooBoo.

Lashley then Speared Eddie in the ring, and MVP walked Davey to the edge of the Ramp where Lashley speared Davey off the Ramp through a Table on the floor. Awesome way to start the show, aside from the inane chit chat, a good bit of Stage Throwing does wonders for my Wrestling appetite. Dat Paper

Just when you think you’re done with the Opening Dialogue of the show, Eric Young came out to talk about MVP. So yay, that happened! And then straight away MVP, Lashley and King are back out. It’s not Total Nonstop Promo, level’s of bad and annoying. But Wrestling damn it. You have no idea how good a Wrestling Match is to kick off Impact. Start the show with The Menagerie, that would be neat.

Anyway, good ol’ respectable Champ Eric Young jumped to the name calling game, Scumbag, Sell-out, words thrown around. Who cares! Why do you need to put names on people you don’t like. Surely calling them out to call them names is as childish as rolling on the floor trying to punch each other… oh wait.

They all get a fight, Austin Aries runs out to EY’s aid, set up matches for later. Couldn’t they have done this before? Why didn’t EY or Aries help out poor Davey. Meh, whatever.

Angelina Love vs. Brittany – Knockouts Championship – Open Challenge

Angelina offered out this Open Challenge, which is only for those who have never held the Knockouts Championship before. Of course this was played as Angelina “dodging” the competition. This also annoys me. What is it, a Month or so since The Beautiful People reformed, Angelina came back strong, not taking any crap, said it straight as it is. Took the fight to Madison, beat her up, took the Belt from her, she was dominating the Division, and now she’s scared of everyone, in how many weeks?

Why is it that she’s running away from Gail, and Gail is no longer backing down from anyone, Gail has been backing out of fights for years. I get it, Wrestling, good guy, bad guy. But it doesn’t make sense, and I don’t like it.

I want a Champion who is a Heel, who is dominant, and won’t run, won’t budge, and kicks ass. James Storm – World Champ, I want it.

As much as this might “irk” me a little, there is however a silver lining, a word that allows the complete 180. This does suck, Velvet a little help BUTT

Indeed, this does suck, But, Velvet did point at her rear whilst saying the Word but. I don’t know why, but I’m not afraid to admit that I “lol’d” a little.

So yes, Brittany accepted the Open Challenge (who else is there…. really, who is there?) though perhaps if it happens again, then Taryn Terrell might turn up, so if Angelina does defeat Gail, then my money is on that return.

Regardless! Distraction from Velvet, Angelina wins etc etc. With her almost losing to Brittany, but thanks to Velvet’s distraction didn’t, again, I get it, good guy, bad guy, etc, but really? butt really

They put some lipstick on Brittany, which I thought was a nice gesture, bag on the head, Gail out, fight. Usual stuff. Angelina vs. Gail at Slammiversary? Angelina better win.
Austin Aries vs. MVP

So this happened, a Rematch from the first time they fought. So it seems Aries is back currently. I don’t know who long for, but just having him on TV makes the world of difference. Oh how I’ve missed Austin Aries. I do think if things carry on the way they are, then Destination X could be very interesting for Aries.

Though I’m probably wrong.

As much as I’d love to say this match was great and Aries is back on point… it really wasn’t that special. The usual match, Aries throws around MVP, because he’s a bad guy now, so he gets beat up more, it’s a conscience thing. One might even say Con-Science. But also probably not.

Aries was in control went to hit his 450 Splash, King and Lashley both came out to attack Aries. EY then back out to help.

Dixie then turned up with EC3, and finally confronted MVP, offering a delightful question of “what I can do for you”. Which is much better, Dixie wanting a united front between her and MVP. Though it could turn out to be a suckered MVP in and then take over once more. I don’t know anymore.

Bully wasted no time in going after Dixie, but it was King, Lashley and MVP who beat Bully down, with EC3 putting Bully through a Table.
Magnus (w/Bram) vs. Willow – Falls Count Anywhere

I do feel that this might boil over to Magnus vs. Bram, and suddenly I’m rooting for Magnus. When did this happen. Willow sucks at this point. He’s just Jeff Hardy, being an idiot, getting thrown around whilst he screams like a woman. There’s a phrase for it…. looked good on paper

Bram Flakes wasted no time in shouting at Magnus to hit Willow in the head with the, crow pliers, thing. “Cave his head in!” in a lovely British tone, reminds me of the recent elections.

Alas, Magnus swung for the gut, but wouldn’t and couldn’t bring himself to hit Willow in the head, which is a good thing. And then Magnus lost, once again doing the right thing, and paying the consequences… he’s like Spider-Man.

Sort of.

Spider Magnus Eddie Edwards makes his way back after being with Davey in the “hospital”. He then calls out MVP, Lashley or King for a fight, King answers and they brawl.

I actually like King a lot in this position. I’ve always been a big fan of his, but he’s struggled to find his place. Even being a bad guy recently didn’t quite feel right, but him being a hot headed, slightly unhinged guy running with the power. I like it. I even like his silly cackle, laughing at people who get injured. Also this segment does a lot to put over Edwards, another good move to balance out the playing field between he and Davey.

Anderson and Storm met in a Bar to compete in a Drinking Contest. Anderson drank Water whilst Storm got drunk, then Anderson took advantage and beat him up. He didn’t take advantage and put the “moves” on Storm, like most people would in that position. o.O I’m not quite sure what I admitted to in that sentence.

Storm love

Eric Young vs. Bobby Lashley

Main Event time and EY took to battle against Lashley. One thing I can say, Lashley = Impressive.

The more I see him in action, the more I like him. I’m glad he’s a big part of this puzzle, and it can’t do anything to hurt him going forward.

Pretty much the same outcome as MVP vs. Aries, only Brian Hebner was threatened to “do the right thing” by MVP before the match.

EY hit the Piledriver, King and MVP out on the attack. Lashley hits the Spear, and Powerslam, Hebner doesn’t DQ and Lashley pins the Champ.

Aries then comes back to EY’s aid with a Kendo Stick, though it didn’t phase Lashley, and MVP, King and Lashley all stood tall to close the show.

So nothing new, but I do like this Stable of MVP, King and Lashley. I actually hope it gets added to.

I do think Bobby Roode and or Abyss will come back to even the odds soon enough.

This might just be “sailing” along, but it’s not boring. I do feel MVP, King and Lashley are legit enough to sell this rise to Power better than the likes of The Aces and Eights and especially Immortal.

I hope TNA don’t look at “correcting” this for Bound for Glory, to yet another temporary power storyline leading into more of the same in 2015. Sick of it now, no matter who is in charge.

Till then,

Dan Wilkinson

www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

www.thesteelchair.com

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www.cageamateursuk.com/News.php

The Jobber Blogger #106 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 15/5/14

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The Jobber Blogger

So last week turned out a little bit negative. And sure, my cynical negativity has branched out further in other areas, but at least this week’s Impact ended on a note to pull me back to the middle ground. But first, the Negativity!

Kazarian is officially done with TNA, and so is Hernandez. Now, I don’t want to come across mean, but I’m somewhat surprised Hernandez was still on the Roster. He’s good, but he just didn’t “fit” that well in anything. The best thing he had going was with Chavo, and Chavo was just as terrible, so it’s only right they both be gone. Now on the flip side of that is Bad Influence. Kaz and Daniels, TNA originals, and of course with AJ Styles they make the trio of that core group people love, I guess you can make an argument for Samoa Joe… bets on how long he will last?

This is the run down, TNA apparently didn’t even offer new contracts to Kaz and Daniels and decided to let them go. So you can say, well that’s insulting after how many years? But of course the alternative is pretty simple too. Christopher Daniels, I love the dude, but I can be honest and say I was never that keen on him prior to Bad Influence. He was alright, I didn’t think his look suited his gimmick, I didn’t really like the Fallen Angel gimmick. Kazarian also impressed me in the ring, but again he had a hard time finding his place. When Fortune was created, Kazarian popped. But unfortunately he never really had any ball to run with, even a small deflated one.

AJ Styles’ life was made difficult by Kaz and Daniels, and at that time rendering them somewhat unlikable, Kaz turning on AJ, Daniels being a douche. But then something happened, AJ went on to do his own thing and from it, Bad Influence was born. Now the beauty about Bad Influence is that TNA pretty much gave Kaz and Daniels the keys to their own creativity. And what you got was two best friends, being themselves, albeit a more hyped up offensive version at times. But everything come Amazing Spider-man to Stupid T-Shirts, to calling the Fan’s “Ass Puppets” and more, it just worked. Throw back Thursdays, EGO, everything they were doing worked. Now in the ring, they worked even better. Kaz and Daniels can WRESTLE, end of. And they are damn good at it. When you can put themselves across through Bad Influence, that draws a whole lot of eyes and hype to their Matches, and they deliver, that makes them something special. The fact they only held the belts for a short amount of time is a joke. Specially in a Division that barely exists… that they are in the middle of. They had no competition to their level, yet they weren’t considered to hold the Championships. Regardless, in the long history of TNA, Kaz and Daniels probably rank somewhere low, given that they haven’t hit the Main Event status over half of TNA’s roster has. So really, they probably just don’t fit with the Direction TNA are going. Which is sad, but it is a business. They aren’t young guys anymore, the key to success in Wrestling is to keep things fresh, and hope that the freshness works. Being in a tight spot financially and you have two guys who you probably really like, but don’t have anything for them right now, why would you keep them on the pay checks? It’s a tough call, but if they can afford Four brand new Hot Indy Talents on the same wage to try and develop their future potential, then that’s the safe bet.

I wouldn’t say the Door is closed, aside from the fact that you do start to wonder how long TNA can keep going at times. The problem is this, sure Global Force Wrestling is on the Horizon, and that’s exciting. Now I would love a TNA version 2.0 where the guys who were messed around buy those in power got their chance to make a Career they should have had. What does it say when you start a Brand New Wrestling promotion and fill it with guys who are known as TNA Guys, been on TV for over 10 years. The people that don’t care about TNA and those talents, that’s already gone. A new promotion should be a good balance for sure, but ideally, it’s new talent, new belts, new stories, new feel, new stars. So I wonder where Kaz and Daniels will end up, but I sure hope they land somewhere to carry on.

So yes, I have grown accustom to their departure, yet it does still sour me. Not from a business perspective, because I totally understand it. I suppose when Bad Influence is gone, and Rob Terry is back… how do you deal with that reality?

Sooner or later TNA is going to be a completely different place, with very little Original Stars left. It’s almost like WWE losing Rock and Austin, which… they also did… but they didn’t go anywhere else.

And on the swing into the positive, TNA did at least please me in some regard. What regard? Well Read on!

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TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 15/5/14

Eric Young kicked off the show, ticked from last week’s turn from MVP. EY even went so far as to “promise – this kind of stuff doesn’t happen on my watch”. I don’t understand how that would even be possible.

EY is probably the good Fall Guy for someone to Turn against. EY is obviously popular, so it can develop a Heel (MVP) pretty quickly. Having a Trusting Face that MVP was turn against that guy, can work well too. You just need to keep on top of it, because the great Heels very quickly become fan favourites, and that’s bad news for your goody too shoes Champion.

We at least managed to avoid a “Why MVP Why?” segment. Anyone who knows me, will know that I can’t stand the “reasons” speech.

I mean it was there still, it was just better than I expected. MVP is out to control all the power, plain and simple, nothing personal, no other business, he just wants the Championship.

I do like that. I’ve been saying I want someone to just step up and take the fight to the Champion. I do think MVP can quickly be a “turn and run” guy. Whereas someone like James Storm can probably achieve the same results in his opposition.

Willow vs. Magnus and Bram – 2 on 1

I don’t really know what to say. The more we see Willow the more stupid he gets. I like the idea, but it’s just maybe too late for Jeff to develop it. Clearly TNA has too much invested in Jeff Hardy that they won’t let him develop it. It’s almost at the stage of “here’s Jeff Hardy being weird again”.

He’s not a Character.. he’s Jeff being a Character… and a Wrestling show about guys with “real problems” and gripes being these Characters, acting it out… you don’t need another dimension on top of that. I suppose it can either be a really good thing… or more often than not be utterly dumb.

I hope that Willow can get established, because it does open the Doors for future potential. IE Jeff comes back as himself, and sooner or later is under stress, leading into a more “Hardcore” environment, and he could transform to Willow. I just don’t know if it would work so well given that it’s Jeff.

Again on the plus side, I am liking Bram so far. I think he is playing this “best friend” angel rather well, and doesn’t seem to be that bothered by the fact that No-body knows who he is. I am wondering how long it is before TNA put him in a new Tag-Team with James Storm though.

StormFlakes

It could work…

Magnus is trying to find his inner violence… which is confusing in itself. Normally in these circumstances the one trying to find themselves is the good guy… right. Yet Jeff is the good guy, I don’t know. It doesn’t matter. I just don’t think Magnus needs yet another “change”.

Bram threw a Crowbar, pipe, wrench, stick at Magnus to use against Willow, Magnus refused then got pinned, leaving Bram annoyed. Angry Bram is bad… bram.

Gail Kim vs. Velvet Sky

So Gail came out, high fiving Fans, shaking hands, generally encouraging the fans to a sea of Gail Kim chants. Did I miss something?

When did she turn.

She wasn’t a Face last week… though I did like her slight jab at the Evening Gown Match.

She hasn’t done anything to turn yet, aside from a couple minor altercations with The Beautiful People. I hate Turns, I really do.

Specially Face turns. It’s like Bully just coming out and being the good-guy getting the Fans chanting, he’s spent years and years making them hate his guts. Then just one thing and he’s their best friend and people buy into it. It’s stupid. I know it shouldn’t annoy me, but I mean at least make it gradual, don’t just be like a sudden change of heart, and everything is fine again.

Gail wasted no time in calling out The Beautiful People which led to Velvet sneak attacking her and then the match was on.

Velvet put a bag on Gail’s head… and then lost. Pretty much sums it up.

I don’t know. Seems like Angelina has had no time to breath as Champion. She came back, it felt like a big deal, Beautiful People reunion, straight into a feud with Madison, 6 time Knockouts Champ, and now she’s the number two Knockout to Gail Kim’s reputation and fan base. Which means if you’re going to push Gail to this degree, that usually ends with a Title Change. Probably not the first time, but eventually, Gail can’t be dethroned. So Angelina practically means nothing currently.

Kazarian vs. Crazy Steve

So this was The Menagerie’s second appearance. Thankfully I preferred it.

Kaz didn’t have to job, in fact… nothing really happened, but it was borderline okay… not good… and not quite bad, but could easily drop into that category.

Knux at least has more suitable attire. But I think the idea of this faction is for them all to be “different” from each other. And so different that they can’t actually act together, and everything is a mess. Least that’s what I took away from it… and if that’s the case, then I’m on board. I am actually more suited to the idea that Rob Terry has no idea what he’s doing and it’s stupid, rather than me trying to take him seriously, because seriously TNA, I’ve seen him Wrestle, for years, why are you paying this guy?

Anyway.

Kaz eventually just left, Crazy Steve was attacking his Balloons, which on a side note, he did a top rope splash, and missed them, which is rather hilarious.

In the end he pulled down the Ref’s trousers and got a DQ, so least Kaz won?

“The Freak” was on the apron just pulling on the ropes, part of me hoped he’d fall… I’m not ashamed to admit that.

I’m still not sold, but I am curious. In the end though, the first sentence in my notes sums it up best – “I enjoy The Menagerie – Freak just sucks”.

Menagerie T-shirt

We finally saw Austin Aries again, for about a Minute, he just called MVP a phoney then EY jumped on MVP and started attacking him. Austin Aries is the perfect example of why TNA sucks – the Heavyweight Championship picture, is terrible. There’s nothing else, just one shot, your done, next guy. Bobby Roode was the start of something great, the best TNA title run and World Title run I can remember in Wrestling for years, Austin Aries’ rise to the top was perfect, because it was “real”. Aries carried himself because he’s freaking great. Then it just went downhill, and quickly. I think Jeff was fine, then Bully was the start of the irrelevant Champion. The Aces and Eights should have (and I still think were meant to be) more than they were. Bully was crap as the Champ, Sabin was the utter worst, AJ’s run sucked, Magnus sucked, and EY is alright. But let’s be honest how long will it last, and will he get there again…. doubtful.

Austin Aries has been an afterthought for far too long, and he’s capable of being the best on the show, and he’s not. I do think it probably started with the whole “Christy Hemme” thing in some ways. But he should probably get out, and should easily be put to the test in GFW.

Either way, EY and MVP tore it up, but MVP soon got the upper hand by trapping EY’s arm in a chair and stamping on it. In the end after EY was beaten down, MVP agreed to EY’s original wish of defending the World Championship each week, and EY vs. MVP in the Main Event was created.

Mr. Anderson vs. James Storm

I don’t know what it is about TNA, but they make the mid-card so predictable, and easy to fall into, and fall further down out of, with dumb stories and silly reasons to feud.

Anderson and Storm is a good example of this, despite the fact that I think they are capable of having some good matches.

The thing that stood out the most though, was that Anderson once again seems bored. I don’t blame him. He must be sick to death of his gimmick, I am. Does he need to do it all the time?

I’ve said it before, but he was finally “going somewhere” when he was in the Aces and Eights, turning him Face, letting him feud with Bully, in a very personal, violent feud, it could have paid off. It didn’t, instead they turned Bully baby face and now Anderson is nowhere again.

What I find interesting the most about this pairing, is that Storm is obviously a true – through and through American born and bred guy. Yet Anderson’s new attire is showing a patriotic side to him, I never knew existed. Could be why they went with “Kennedy” back in the WWE rather than Anderson.

I do think the whole American Revolution is at the forefront of its popularity currently, and Anderson wears the Snake logo’s and Don’t Tread on Me / Join or Die slogans with pride. It’s a weird thing to associate with Anderson, but I like it.

So these two being strong American enthusiasts from totally different environments, is a more interesting clash, than Storm accidently kicked him.

Storm grabbed his Beer bottle, took a Swig, then attempted to smash it over Anderson’s head. Instead Anderson caught him, the Ref grabbed the Bottle and Storm spat beer in Anderson’s face from the distraction, dropped him with the Last Call Superkick and won. – If only it ended there…

DTOMvsHILLBILLY

America’s Finest, in a battle of the greats!

An interesting and somewhat unexpected part of the show was a trip to Visit Samuel Shaw in his Straight Jacket, calling for Christy. He had a guest – Gunner. I don’t know why Gunner went to see him, but I do find it interesting to find out. I still think it would have been cooler if Anderson ended up being committed, and it changing who he was. I suppose Gunner with his strict Army background is probably a safe match for Shaw to balance himself out against. Who knows… it’s Wrestling.

DJZ vs. Tigre Uno vs. Sanada – X-Division Championship

I’m starting to think that when Sanada is done with TNA, probably after feuding with The Great Muta, is still my prediction. It seems Zema is going to be the one taking the X-Division gold. Now of course that doesn’t mean he will cashing it in. Hell, Sanada might cash it in, and get screwed out of it by The Great Muta. Either EY remains champ and Kenny King tries to grab the X-Division title, maybe losing it to Austin Aries is my hope. Or, MVP is the champ, and Aries cashes in. I just want Aries back in the main events.

Either way, this was a good match, and you wouldn’t expect any less. I suppose my original point is this, despite DJZ’s push in the division and Sanada’s exposure, it was Tigre Uno once again who stood out as the best. Which is disappointing, because I honestly feel he probably won’t get a look in anytime soon for the Championship.

Should I mention it’s funny that Uno lost a “Best of 3” series… and then gets another Title Shot. Good booking, stuff like that kind of bugs me a little.

Anywho, Sanada picked up the win from his Tiger Suplex on DJZ and retained his Championship.

A running theme this week, much like last, was Bully Ray going after Dixie. This time Dixie was arriving home with Spud and a Cameraman and Bully had numerous Tables set up outside her home reading “Dixie Fears Bully”. Spud and the Cameraman went in the house to find him. In the end though it was Bully and Dixie face to face, with him wanting Dixie to admit that she fears him. Which is when EC3 attacked Bully from behind. So we know where this is going next. Still, I enjoy these segments currently. Though I do wish to have Dixie address MVP on TV.

Eric Young vs. MVP – World Heavyweight Championship

There wasn’t really much of a match here. Obviously the idea was these two battling for the Championship at Slammiversary, but it had been brought forward.

I’ll just get to the good stuff, Kenny King got involved and caused a DQ. Which does seem a little bit silly. Surely MVP would have wanted to Win the belt there and then? He didn’t seem so phased. The Ref refused to restart the match. This just left MVP and King beating up on EY when Bobby Lashley ran to the ring. Which pretty much paints the picture itself. So Lashley joins in attacking EY, leaving MVP, King and Lashley united.

So a few more Heel Turns, and another stable. But I do like the power angle, and is it offensive to point out they are all black? I’m sure that’s a part of the idea. Something I really like, it’s a good Nation of Domination.

Shame I forget Lashley is on the roster every week. Still, I look forward to seeing where this might go.

A few lose ends it might seem, but it could also look like they’ve been planning this for a while, which would throughout the whole TNA copying WWE thing.. which I still think is blatantly obvious.

Regardless, you have got me back on board… a little. Now run with it!

Till then,

Dan Wilkinson

www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

www.TheSteelChair.com

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Monday Night Raw #1095: May 19, 2014

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The Infamous Informer

This is it people! My confrontation with Zeb Colter is at hand!!! The WWE is in the UK, and if that muthaf***a is here, all hell WILL BREAK LOOSE! Never mind Vincent Kennedy losing a third of his fortune, Look here, it’s Malcolm X’s birthday, CM Punk has started his tweets again, his fans have started wanking again, it is time to get what’s ours, from out this f***a, by any means necessary!!!!

RAW #1095, HOLD DAT – BLAOW!!!

17,000 Strong on fire in London England! that’s how the F**K WE ROLL!!!

Hold up – not even the WWE intro could run? The Wyatt man dem shut that down one time! Damn son! He Got The Whole World In His Hands! Bray Wyatt with a BAFTA Award Winning promo! But Cena shut that sh!t down with an AA!!! He knows to run as well!!!!

I wanna give a shout out to STC Admin and member Matt Blick, who just informed me that Total Divas Season 3 is jumping off September 7, and joining the cast is Rosa Mendes!!! You know when she starts speaking that Spanish, she gets my d!ck hard like a muthaf***a!!!!

 

Uh-oh, here comes Paul Heyman…. here we go!!!! Did he just say that the British queen is dying???? Oh lawwwd I’m not a fan of the Royal Family, but lightning is gonna strike on Paul Heyman word is bond! That’s almost as bad as him saying that His Client Brock Lesnar Conquered the Undertaker’s Streak at WrestleMania!!! By the way Matt Blick… it’s not getting old… it gets BETTER!!! Only because I believe it’s all leading to something!

WTF??!!!! Since when did Paul Heyman turn into Terry Silva from The Karate Kid III? “A man can’t breathe, he can’t fight”….??? While Cesaro got the sleeper hold on Sheamus??!!!

Paul Heyman is so TEEF!!! He baited it up for Sheamus!!! Sheamus is like – Ok Cesaro, you got me…. put it there… holds out hand, and Cesaro might as well have kissed his teeth!!! Sheamus is smiling like – ok cool… see what happens when I brogue kick your blodclart!!!

Cesaro face facts – you are never gonna get booed at this time!

Now the Shield Vs Evolution Beef…. now it’s a No Holds Barred Elimination match!!! YES!!!! BRING THE MUTHAF***!N RUCKUS!!!! (and you’re more concerned over Vincent Kennedy’s money… let me tell you – HE AIN’T WORRIED WHEN YOU GET MADE REDUNDANT!!!)

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Wait a minute – in fact – wait two minutes! One, we have a foreign announce table??? Somebody gonna get put through that muthaf***a!

The second minute – a beat the clock challenge to compete for the Intercontinental Title???? Ok, well if what I heard on the BDSIR Network Perfect Plex Radio show is true, and whatever the folks at Powerbomb Pro Wrestling are saying, Wrestling Fans are gonna be bex, and I am gonna be laughing! Whoever loses, I WIN! that’s my motto!

Big ups to Big E for advancing in the Beat The Clock challenge… Ryback lose again…. I’m sure 3MB got more wins than him by now! F**K That – I bet Barry Horowitz has won more matches than Ryback!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Hold up – this is crazy! the Funkadactyls supporting R-Truth! He was meant to fight Fandango…. but somebody else doesn’t like Layla getting kissed up like that on TV – Summer Rae!!!! OH SNAP!!! She slaps one on Fandango’s lips too! Next minute Layla and Summer ketch – up!!! War between the two gyal! YES CHANTS ALL OVER LONDON! Word up – I’m backing my beautiful Layla ALL THE WAY!!! Make it happen WWE – Summer Rae Vs Layla at Payback!!! Loser gets Fandango! Winner gets ME!!!! (Which means Summer MUST LOSE!!!!)

Wait a minute – Danny Bryan in England??? No No No must be some mistake!

Stephanie with the YES CHANT? Yeah I’m Chanting YES!!!!! Look at Steph – GOD DAYUUUUM!!!! Why are you chanting NO! for you fools????

Hmmm I think Stephanie is being fair!!! She could have stripped Danny of the title and awarded to Kane (which I would like) or Wade Barrett (I would be like WHAAAT??) or Batista (which I would be throwing up my Wu-Tang sign) or Triple TEEF (which I would be saying – TRIPLE TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!!)

But she wants Danny to surrender the title himself… Steph is being fair – why the boos????

Tell you what Danny, let me help you… this is what happened in 1997…

 

Oh no not the muthaf***in Union Jacks??? Get the f**k outta here!

YES!!! So Lana is out to prove she’s not racist! F**k!n hell RAVISHING AIN’T THE WORD! How can the London crowd chant ‘WHO ARE YA’??? ARE YOU BLIND????

YUSEF – I might forgive you! You gonna destroy Heath Slater???? YES!!! KILL HIM!!! KILLLLLLLLLLLL HIMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!!

Shame WWE dropped the ball on that one still… Malcolm X birthday, and my brothers (R-Truth, Kofi, Xavier Woods, Big E) didn’t stand together…. shout out to TNA…. they seem to have got it right!!!

OK RVD, BERTIE, you have 5:02 to beat… GO!!!

OH SNAP!!! So much for Bertie doing this for the planet…. RVD beats the clock! 4:15… sorry Big E!!! Well you still have beef with Yusef!

Wait a minute – Batista wanted to do this by himself didn’t he? Now Randall is the time-keeper? And Triple TEEF is the Ring announcer??? What sort of sh!t is that??!! Seth Rollins – you need to call for reinforcements here!

Oh my god he did! Special guest commentators – Dean & Roman! Triple is BEX!

Hold up – Brad Maddox is still the general manager??? I didn’t know either!

Shout out to Dean Ambrose – he just said that Roman Reigns Moms hits him harder than that! 9 stitches ain’t sh!t!!!! Dean is telling the truth!!!! The Samoans don’t play!

Trust that TRIPLE TEEF to start the f**kery! Could we see the purpose of the German announce table?

The Shield were ready for Evolution’s f**kery!!! Backing them all the way at Payback!!!

Oh no, Alicia Fox is back…. get the job done this time girl! Beat that pale woman to a pulp! Sorry guys! I’m not on the Paige train!

It’s gonna happen again isn’t it? Alicia Fox so dominant, then Paige wins with 1 move… oh no!!

OH SNAP!!! Alicia got her!!!! YES!!!! That was superb!!! Look at her celebrating!!!! YES ALICIA! THAT WAS FOR MALCOLM!

Ok Beat the clock jump off! Mark Henry! Dolph Ziggler! 4:15 to beat! GO!

BIRTHDAY SHOUT OUT TO ANDRE THE GIANT!!! SALUTE THE 8th WONDER!

HA! HA! HA! HA! I’m disappointed Mark Henry didn’t beat the clock, but I’m glad Ziggler failed!!! RVD wins but – BLAOW!!! a bull hammer in the skull! I’M AFRAID I GOT SOME BAD NEWS! Barrett is celebrating to the British Bulldog’s music??? Can he do that???

Shout out to JAY-BEE – “how did that stupid bunny get through customs??” That was superb!!!! I think Renée Young is about to become a rosebud! Renée needs a good f-

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Fandango move over – it’s all about Adam Rose’s theme tune! The London crowd love it! Why does Adam Rose sound like a battyman???

Why the F**K is Zeb Colter here? How the F**K did HE GET THROUGH CUSTOMS! That’s it London Crowd – GET HIM!!!

WHO ARE YA! WHO ARE YA! WHO ARE YA! SHUT THE F**K UP COLTER!

DROP THE WHAT? CHANT ON HIM YES!! Hold up -Zeb Colter Vs Adam Rose??? YES! YES! YES! YES! Swagger is such a deluded fool! Yes Adam! it’s all about this party fist! F**K that – I like this Adam Rose fool!!!

MAIN EVENT JUMP OFF! Luke Harper! John Cena! Wyatt followers Hold up your iPhones!!!

Yes it’s true… Mike Cole said back in the day fans would hold up lighters… yeah for The Undertaker’s arrival… Ok if CM Punk fans can have faith in their saviour, so can I! I would love to see Bray Wyatt Vs The Undertaker at Summerslam! Can you make it happen Deadman???

Did Harper just do a hurricanrana???? blodclart!!!! Even the Usos who are at ringside are thinking – But-but-but-but!!!!!

Blodclart! The Wyatts start the f**kery, but Bray hitting Sister Abigails on the Usos one time!!! Now the match is thrown out… 17,000 singing The Whole World In His Hands again!!! Bray’s gonna kill you!!! Looks like the German announce table was spared tonight!!! A fall away slam on the concrete floor, followed by a Sister Abigail on the concrete – BLAOW!!!!! And while Bray sings, Luke counts to 10!!!! CRAZY!!!

You know what Cena? I dedicated this song to you, you should start singing it, maybe if you turn evil which you won’t but try this:

 

#VOCAREADREGNUM!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#GWARNYUHBED
IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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Monday Night Raw #1094: May 12, 2014!!!

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Since WWE likes to sign up new divas for a development deal, they might be interested in this one! Name: Solange Knowles… she put her boots to Jay-Z’s Candy @$$! Blows up Facebook, everybody put it pon dem wall like they found the breaking news… but what I wanna know is: WHY? Why did Solange spazz out on Jay and Beyoncé just stood there… what did Jay do??? People quick to post it because they jumped on the bandwagon of hating Jay-Z. You sheeple are foolish! (Oh you’re defending Illum-) STOP YOUR NOISE! You’re the ones with your sheep masks following the buzzards!

And that story overshadowed the fact that Chef Raekwon is heading to the studio to lace some verses for Wu-Tang’s A Better Tomorrow album….

ENOUGH OF THIS SH!T – Isn’t Raw in the UK this week? I dare you Zeb – come to our shores… I’M BEGGIN YA!!!

RAW #1094, HOLD DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZI guess we’re not in the UK… F**K the long talk! The Shield are like – Is that all you got Evolution? We are gonna straight – F**K YOU UP!!!

And that’s what they set out to do! As soon as Triple come out his limo, The Shield rushed him and his crew!!! LAWD HAVE MERCY!!!

Oh no that muthaf***a has got that muthaf***!n deportation list again, now he’s added Adam Rose on that list and look what happen… here he comes with his party crew, and f**ked it up for Wack Swagger! I’ve just learned that this Adam Rose dude is British as well… the STC are on split feelings on this one! I notice no one is on that We The People sh!t…. if only they listened to me, but NOOOOOOOO!!! I’m just a black man who doesn’t care about the Chris B£^@!+ sh!t…

Here comes Paige… one of the people Zeb Colter doesn’t like…. I look at you all in disgust!

GRANT - BODY - P

Alicia Fox is out to f**k up Paige isn’t she??? Claims she doesn’t fit in… well durrrr!!! Paige will tell you she doesn’t fit in, because she’s the Anti Diva! She ain’t gonna look pretty like say Eva Marie and have no skills… Because she HAS skills brings sexual appeal to a lot of the STC guys! She still doesn’t stimulate me… I’m sorry!

All those power moves Alicia, and Paige out wrestles your @$$??? Damn girl! Kicking up a fuss ain’t gotta do sh!t, go back and fix up! And I don’t mean taking off with JAY-BEE’s cowboy hat and gone with it!

Tell me it’s not so…. did the Authority win the war after all that? Danny Bryan has to go away for neck surgery…ain’t that a b!tch… what does this mean? Has he gotta give up his titles???? This is f**ked up word up! I guess that means Cena can reclaim his throne…. I was hoping for that alleged Buried Alive match at Payback…. let’s see how long Danny is out the game for… Kurt Angle Danny Bryan

RECORD SKIP – there’s now talk of Luke Harper and Erick Rowan possibly fighting the Usos for the tag team titles???? UH-OH!!! I sense the end of the Usos reign… let’s hope it’s not the case but either way it makes for good storyline!

You mean to tell me that after that victory by Cena & The Usos, Bray Wyatt is laughing about it and says ‘he realises what he must do’???? This is what I mean with Bray! You can’t just defeat him in a wrestling competition, you must DESTROY HIM COMPLETELY!!!!

Oh dear Evolution – dem mans are BEX!!! Triple TEEF with the long talk – ‘We gonna pick apart Dean Ambrose-uuuuuuuuh, then we gonna tear the wings from Seth Rollins-uuuuuuuh, then Roman Reigns is gonna get the slow beating-uuuuuuh! Because at Payback-uuuuuuuuh, it’s gonna be’ – SHUDDUP!!! The Shield rushed them again!!!! Batista is fuming! He wants to test Roman Reigns later!!! And he will probably get brukk up too! Why you bex for Batista? RZA & Raekwon have reached their agreements! The album will be completed!

Back to our Total Laydeez, now Natalya and Nikki are competing in a match because Natalya made a god-awful painting of Nikki and John, I thought it was a sweet gift but it’s led to a wrestling contest so here we go, the other ladies are rating the wrestling moves… cameramen what are you doing??? Get the cameras on Cameron! She got the new single out! What – Ray J is not there??? Shut up and tek de picture!

Nikki won the match… I suppose there is a penalty for giving a nice gift from the goodness of your heart…

 

When the rain comes down,

I know it’s falling for me, and only for me…

And the pain comes around, somewhere else I’d rather be,

I know what I’ve done, Please forgive me…

I bet that’s what’s going through Natalya’s head right now…

Damn son I’m trying to get into this Sheamus Vs Ryback match but I’m tired yo… where’s Paul Heyman to give me joke???

Ok I don’t get Heyman but I get Stephanie McMahon….. OH YEAH!!!!

Hang on, I think I get the picture…. she’s gonna take the titles from Danny… or maybe not…. oh sh!t!!! IT’S KAAAAAANE!!! He just drew Danny’s carcass out to the stage!! Oh lawwwd this means Brie is vulnerable!!!! She still has to come to work!!!!

Danny taken away in an ambulance, Stephanie going on like she’s sincere… Brie pushes her one side and did you see the look on Stephanie’s face???? I saw Vincent Kennedy…. Oh dear Brie I wouldn’t want to be you!!!!

Now this is the point where I cuss down Fandango to the ground because he stole my beautiful Layla… but if he’s fighting Dolph Ziggler then we have a common enemy… COME ON FANDANGO!!! DESTROY HIM!!!

OH F**K!!!! Layla might have cost Fandango the match here… well Layla, that’s what you get for dissin me…wait – Fandango LOVES YOU??? WHOA!!! He don’t love you like I do Layla…

Aiyo, he don’t really love you like I do
Kiss your feet, make love to you, like I do
Wake you up, in the night tank and surprise you
Cross my heart, swear, put my hand on the bible
I’m not a cold-blooded killa, baby, I cry too
The best thing for me is when I’m laying beside you
Turn you over, open up, get up inside you
He a woman beater, no doubt, and he lies too…

Yo what up Hacksaw Jim Duggan!!!! HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

F**K ME that Lana…she that chick that you f**k her with her clothes on…. if she doesn’t have a man, something seriously wrong with the world! Why hasn’t WWE got her on book signings in the UK damnit??!!!

So Lana sets Yusef on Hacksaw… he was ready to take him but Big E Langston thought – that ain’t happening… only to get brukk up…. damn, how many more black wrestlers gotta die??? First R-Truth, Xavier Woods, then Kofi, now Big E???? WTF???Racial man Racial!!!!

I’m glad that Sandow got rid of that Magneto sh!t…. they gave him back the mic to chat… Oh Cody Rhodes why did you interrupt him for? I was looking forward to Sandow to SILENCE!! the crowd!

Now we realise what Bray Wyatt is gonna do! Beat down Cena until he can no longer stand??? Last Man Standing…. Payback… OH MAN!!!!

Enough of that sh!t – Batista! Roman Reigns! HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

Evolution and The Shield already at ringside – you already know this ain’t ending well…

…for Evolution!!! They tried to be teef and got half the locker room to rush the ring to beat down the Shield! But the Hounds of Justice sent for reinforcements of their own in the form of a steel chair each and beat down the jabronies! It was like power rangers beating down the puttys but militant style! Has Ryback got the record for most Shield powerbombs into the canvas??? He has to surely!!!

Well evolution hinted at a stipulation, I long to see what that could be and by the looks of those chairs how they were swung it could be a further hint… but damn, Danny Bryan out the game???? F***************K!!!!

#VOCAREADREGNUM!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#GWARNYUHBED

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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The Jobber Blogger #105 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 8/5/14

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The Jobber Blogger

I honestly don’t know how I feel about this week’s TNA: Impact.

Aside from a random rather quick tiredness thing that kicked in during it, or, perhaps boredom. Impact just seemed off. And I don’t know if that’s because I’m going “off” it. I love TNA, and will continue to watch it, but the company we all loved has certainly changed. Hell TNA in 2010 enthused with irrelevant old school Wrestlers was much more exciting than the product we have now. It felt back then that TNA was finally heading in the right direction. AJ Stlyes was the World Champ, Beer Money and MotorCity were in the best of 5 Series, Sting had come back hanging around in the rafters. But now, it’s just, different.

And it’s not a bad different, there are a lot of good things going, but I do feel the release of Christopher Daniels has soured me a little, and having Kazarian come out to Wrestler a Jobber’s match, knowing full well he’s going to be out the company in no time, it’s just sad.

The main issue TNA always, always revolves around is that they never change enough. No matter what changes they might make, they don’t change the right people in the back to make a difference, and they always go back to attempt that “One Idea” which brought WCW so much success. But hey, it’s not the 1995, you’re not WCW, you’ve tried it I don’t know how many times now, let it go.

Wrestling. Impact-Wrestling-Logo

TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 8/5/14

It’s yet another packed, but not amazing show. It has great things going for it, good ideas, good matches. Some nice debuts, but everything has a sprinkle of “been there done that, didn’t work, try again”.

Impact opened and continued through-out the night with Bully Ray heading to the Offices of Nashville to find Dixie Carter.

Sure this actually had some redeemable qualities, Spud and Bully have great chemistry together on screen and I hope it continues. After Dixie left the offices, she had Spud in charge to keep order and keep Bully out. Of course Bully just picked him up and decided to Run the headquarters himself for the day.

This is perhaps a good insight to TNA’s failings, the filler drones with brain washed catch phrases and slogans were “running” the ship. Of course we all know these were there for the segment, but perhaps it’s a pretty decent insight as to what actually goes on behind the scenes. I do feel that the on-air product of Wrestling, and those running it, are at times so mismatched, that it’s no wonder it doesn’t work. You have Wrestlers who love Wrestling, hone their Characters, but the people making the decisions are snobs in suits in a different country looking at it as “Television”. They clearly aren’t onto a winning formula, because it’s not working. Jeff Jarrett worked so well because he was the bridge between both worlds.

Ranting aside, Bully put Spud through a Table and found Dixie’s home address on his Mobile Phone.

You might want to know what my favourite part of the Segment was, the opening with Bully Ray in his Car driving to the Headquarters where he is playing “Rock music”. Bully is someone who has been very outspoken for his love of Rock Music and the “today Wrestler” with their Video Games. Yet having Bully, most probably forced to play this particular song, driving along, bobbing his head to modern day teenage rock crap was rather hilarious. modern-teenage-rock-crap-600x373

Eric Young made his way to the ring to issue out an Open Challenge, stating that he wants to be a Fighting Champion, and the promise is to Defend the World Championship every week. I don’t remember him ever saying he was going to do that. Not to mention his Second week as Champion, he just sat at the Announce table for the main event. So there went his “streak” a week later.

Regardless, apparently MVP hadn’t booked him in a match so EY was out to make his own Title Defence, dressed in the “Canadian Tuxedo” – which is also very similar to – old-teenage-rock-crap-600x373

Bobby Roode was out the gate first to accept the Open Challenge. But of course this was pulled down with EY defeating Roode last week. But Roode had to defeat Gunner, completely over-looking the obvious of EY winning a Battle Royal, and defeating Magnus in the same night. Either way, Roode sweet talked his way into yet another Championship match by purely having “History” with EY.

Clearly I have no issue with Roode being in the main events, I love Roode, it just seems that at one time “being like Brothers” again, plays a deciding factor in two people having a match.

Though straight after the segment MVP called off the match, a little annoyed that EY didn’t even let MVP tell him his plans for the night. In which MVP is going to announce EY’s Slammiversary opponent, and someone who he has never faced before. So stay tuned folks!
The Beautiful People vs. Madison Rayne and Brittany – Evening Gown Match

Yes, the Bra and Panties matches re-emerge. I honestly can’t tell you that last time I remember watching a match like this, it did take me back to the guilty feeling of watching the old WWF Bra and Panties matches and being worried of someone walking in trying to figure out just what the hell you are watching.

It’s almost impossible to sell Wrestling as a legitimate show, let alone sell it as a good portrayal of Women. TNA have built this huge foundation of the Knockouts Division on the basis of “Women Wrestlers”. I do believe it was on the reasons why Tara (Victoria) was drawn to the Division. Well having your Women “Wrestlers” strip each other sort of defeats the purpose, and undercuts all of the efforts to credibility you might have once made.

I get it, The Beautiful People are supposed to be racy, and you have attractive Women, and these kinds of matches will probably draw ratings. But it’s for the wrong reason. I do wonder if those involved are actually happy to do the match, I expect they probably are, but then someone like Gail Kim, who prides herself on the division and really being the cornerstone of the Knockouts Division as one of, if not the most well respected, acknowledged and best Female Wrestler in the industry today. Is she pleased to see these kind of matches return?

It’s hard to sell people on your new talent, Brittany, whom already has the misfortune of being named Brittany, now do people look at her as a new Wrestler, or just eye-candy. I love the Knockouts Division, and I love it because TNA were proud to display them centre stage, even in the Main Events, but this, I just don’t feel is needed.

The Beautiful People won with the help of Velvet returning to the ring in a Towel and flashing the Referee, who was so stunned he didn’t notice Angelina use the hair spray in the face of Madison. So now their Referee’s are horny adolescent perverted morons. Awesome work.

Though to lighten the mood I did make this

Make-Over-Terminiator
Ethan Carter the third vs. Kurt Angle

At last, good news!

Kurt Angle successfully sold no-one on his poor “Leg Buckling” during the match.

But this in turn led to EC3 picking up the Win.

And yes, Kurt Angle has actually gone for Surgery. It’s been an injury he has had for around 5 years and finally gone to get it fully repaired. He had minor surgery before on his ACL, hence his short lived return. But he needed / wanted to go the full shebang, Which is good.

On the flip side, this probably means that this was Kurt’s last TNA Impact Match. Kurt’s rehab will take 4 -5 Months. We are in May, so that means he is ready to Compete for September – October. And of course his TNA Contract is up in September, and he most definitely wants to leave.

He might come back here and there, you never know. But Kurt will join AJ and Sting as TNA employees who had a rather naff exit from the company.

I myself have been saying that you can tell Kurt doesn’t really want to be in TNA anymore. His speeches, even about the Hall of Fame are to be more proud of yourselves, and TNA is great. Nothing like he used to say about loving the company or anything like that. He constantly talks about going back to the WWE on Social Media. So let him go already. I’d rather he not be in TNA if he doesn’t want to be there, and that money is better spent elsewhere.

He’s had a great run, done a lot of good for TNA, and I like Kurt, have him back where he belongs, with a retirement match, Hall of Fame induction, maybe go on to be a trainer – perfect.

Also this is sort of funny, given that his most recent come-back prior to this had him feuding with Roode, were Kurt was so feeble he kept defeating / injuring himself with his own moves. EC3 then took him out, he finally got into the Hall of Fame which pretty much sucked. Then got injured again, no-showed a PPV, made a crappy come-back, injured again and got beat then leaves. Great year. Angle-Defeated-600x357
The Bromans vs. The Wolves – World Tag-Team Championship – Ladder Match

This was easily the match of the night. Though after saying that… there weren’t any other matches.

I didn’t even realise that till now.

I love The Wolves, but I was really hoping for a great Tag-Team renaissance, and The Wolves vs. Bad Influence would have been great. Bad Influence dominated the landscape of TNA for pushing 2 years, as the best Tag-Team, despite their poorly limited Title Run. But they were a true highlight. Now they’re gone, so that sort of sucks.

This match wasn’t really quite what I wanted. That isn’t to say that there wasn’t some great spots in the match, because there were. And a couple of things I hadn’t seen before. I do feel this is probably just another stepping stone to set the stage for a great Final Match between The Wolves and The Bromans at Slammiversary.

The highlights of course were Eddie Edwards suplexing Jesse from inside the right to the floor, but Jesse held on, and they both just toppled over the Ropes. That’s the top highlight, and it was great, never seen anything quite like it, and it looked rather nasty to boot, which isn’t a good thing.

Davey leaping from the Top-Rope to Foot-Stomp Robbie E who lay across a Ladder balanced between the Ring and the Steps, again looked nasty.

And of course DJ Zema being hip tossed from the Top of the Ladder in the ring straight to the floor on top of Robbie and Jesse, leaving The Wolves to retain their Championships.

A good Ladder match, which I do strongly feel was to just whet your appetite.

Kazarian vs. Knux

This was the one I was most looking forward to. I love debuts, and especially those which have been building for a while. But the Menagerie perhaps weren’t quite what I hoped.

And take this any way you want, but this felt exactly like you’d expect a TNA idea to play out.

Say what you will, the Menagerie are different enough, but the core idea is most definitely to counteract that of the Wyatt family. Which whilst on the topic, I’m not a big fan of the Wyatt’s. I love the idea, I love the music, the entrance, Bray is awesome. I just don’t think it’s perfect, and I don’t like his Brothers.

This go around, I was rather excited. I actually started to really like Knux in the closing days of The Aces and Eights. He showed he was pretty good on the mic and quite commanding once he had gained the right stage. So it does please me that he is still around. It still bugs me that any mention of The Aces and Eights just isn’t there.

Rebel I like, I’m sold on that, she seems good, I want more Knockouts in the Division, so I hope she is an active Wrestler, which I’m sure she will be. So having her apart of his faction is great too.

Crazy Steve stands out as my favourite, he actually seems to be the most in tune with his Gimmick and playing it to strengths.

And then of course, he’s back… again. Rob Terry, rather than being “The Freak” Rob Terry, he’s just back as The Freak. But to probably hide his identity they just put a bag on his head. That pretty much sums up that Character. He is doing the same stupid flexes, he looks like he struggles walking let alone Wrestling, only now he has a bag on his head. I hope he proves me wrong. But as of right now my interest in this new faction, which is right up my alley has decreased entirely based on the fact that Rob Terry is in it… He’s terrible doesn’t do how bad he is justice.

I thought the music was alright, I liked the Stilt Walkers at the ringside, but another one of my gripes is Knux himself. I’d quite like him to actually go to a bit more effort, maybe look more like a “Ring Leader”. Rather than just a scruffy guy in jeans and a tank top with a beard.

The bad side is Kazarian having to lose to Knux, first time we’ve seen him in ages, Christopher Daniels has gone, Kaz still doing the Bad Influence gimmick, and it’s just sad. Then he has to job, and probably out the company in no time.

Willow vs. Magnus (w/Bram)

So Bram Flakes himself now has a TNA contract, as he went off to make a deal with MVP. Who do you like them…. cereals Bram-Flakes

I do like his British-ness.

Willow seems to be a dying thing too, his excitement has gone, now he’s getting beaten up, put in random matches, and like Matt Fowler from IGN said, he is called Jeff Hardy more than he is Willow. It’s borderline “what’s the point” territory.

This “match” was cut short when Bram got involved, throwing Willow into the steps, getting Magnus a DQ. He then handcuffed Willow to the ropes and attacked him with Magnus’ good friend, Mr. Turnbuckle.

Mr-Turnbuckle-600x306

I like the violence, no doubt this means Willow will be more violent in retaliation, no idea if Bram is going to develop Magnus to a face, or heel, or make him likable. I don’t know. They spent so long on making Magnus who he was, getting him over, turning him heel, making him champ, switching that really quickly to EY then trying to reboot Magnus. No idea.

And last of all, despite MVP came out to the ring earlier on in the night to “announce” EY’s Slammiversary opponent, Bobby Roode got involved, they ended in a brawl.

So this was take two, MVP brought EY to the ring, told him what a great job he’s doing, and announced his Opponent for Slammiversary as someone he has never faced before.

See my gut feeling was it’s going to be Willow, which would have sucked. Then my other feeling was it was going to be MVP. And of course, MVP then attacked EY.

This is where we are, 2Months, that’s all it’s taken for MVP to be like Dixie Carter, like Hulk Hogan, like Eric Bischoff, like The Aces and Eights, like Immortal, like Jeff Jarrett. How many times?

I don’t hate MVP turning, but I do hate that it’s yet another crappy Power Control storyline. They do it every single year. MVP wins control at Lockdown, but oh no, at Bound for Glory he will be defending his Wrestling Operations to someone else.

At least Dixie’s heel turn came out of no-where. If it just stayed between her and AJ Styles it would have worked, but they over did it by making her a dumb rich daughter that didn’t know anything and ruined her company.

2 Months!

Can’t we just have “someone” in Control of TNA who we don’t need to know about, who we don’t see, who isn’t feuding with everyone else in crappy match stipulations. I’m sick of it.

I will however give this time to play out… but you can already see where it’s going. Hey, Maybe Bully Ray will be in charge next… again.

Woo!

Till then,

Dan Wilkinson

www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

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Monday Night Raw #1093: May 5, 2014!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw

Have you missed me????  Good, because the feeling’s not mutual!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

No rest for the wicked! It’s Back on my B.S like Busta Rhymes! Extreme Rules Dun! Now for RAW #1093! HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZSIERRA! HOTEL! INDIA! ECHO! LIMA! DELTA! SHIELD!!!! I told you Evolution are TEEF! Triple just forced Dean Ambrose is forced to defend his US title against 20 other men in a Battle Royal, just because The Shield brukk up Evolution! Let’s be real, Ambrose hasn’t defended his title in a hot minute! 351 days as champion…. Let me guess, a new star from NXT gonna win this sh!t???

Can you believe the Big Show is in this match??? Sheamus is up in there too! Ok guys, this ain’t for the André the Giant trophy!!! This is for the US Title muthaf***a!

Mark Henry is up in there!!! Ok that’s the man I’m backing! Get that Ziggler OUT!!!

Did Big Show just slap Heath Slater’s @$$???? Oh hell 2 da naw!

No way! Big Show and Mark Henry eliminated! Everybody rushed them and got them out!!! Sh!t I gotta find a new dude to back!

YES!!! SANTINO ELIMINATED ZIGGLER!!! The crowd didn’t like it but I did!!!! Santino to w….he’s been eliminated??? Oh Sh!t….

OH SNAP!!! Sheamus wins the US Title??!!!!! Isn’t Sheamus ‘Triple Teef’ endorsed??? I’m jussayin…

I just had to mention his name didn’t I??? Here he comes… Mr TEEF!!!

Ambrose mash-up… and he gotta fight again with his bredrin against the Wyatt man dem??? (I hear you jabronies already… “Again??”) Ahh-yeah again and again!!!

Big ups to STC’s Lee Steadx who pointed out that WWE’s champions minus Danny Bryan and the Usos hail from the UK/Ireland in Sheamus, Paige and Wade Barrett… #BestForBusiness

I swear Paul Heyman is one funny muthaf***a!!! Every time he comes out he’s like – MY CLIENT BRRROCK LESSSNAR CONQUERED THE UNDERTAKER’S STREAK AT WRESTLEMANIA!!!! Yeah Nathan Webb of the STC – tell Paul that it’s old and move on!!! I think it’s jokes!!! And I’m STC’s #1 Undertaker fan!

Look at Paul Heyman watching Cesaro and RVD fight with his foot cocked up on the steps! I wanna have an interview with Heyman one day! The man is BRILLIANT!

OMG the person that is streaming this weeks Raw is a BATTYMAN! Why is he switching between Raw and the gay chatline station??? I am distraught…. I’m sorry I gotta remedy this… I need something to erase what I just saw… and I think this is it…

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SHOUT OUT TO STC’S Edmund Mulhall… he understands….

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Damn why did Cesaro go buckwild on RVD like that? Dropping bows on him and f**k!n him up against the ring turnbuckles! thank god for Heyman who stopped him and said ‘you’re gonna get suspended!’

Two things I think about Bray Wyatt: One, he’s been watching too many apocalyptic movies…. particularly that Urotsukidoji film… and two, he has a good singing voice doesn’t he??? HA! HA! HA! HA!

I can no longer show my moms any more wrestling selection now because if she sees this Bray Wyatt fellow she will start talking about the Illuminati and sh!t….

Haha my hero Kane is getting Brie & Danny shook! I’m glad that they gave back Kane his mind game powers… it interests me where this feud will go… I foresee an ambulance match or an inferno match at Payback…. what do you think guys? Answers on a postcard please! Tweet me @MZATheInfamous!GRANT - BODY - P

It’s all good to see that sexy muthaf***a Lana… but to send Alexander Yusef to brukk up another black man in Kofi Kingston???? Racial man Racial!!! Big E or Mark Henry you need to stop this fool!!!!

Forget the match going on…. STC’s Lee Steadx suggests that this should be Lana’s theme music… well THE GRANT SAYS you can do two things: One, create her on WWE2K14, or two, wait til WWE2K15 and hope that Lana makes it the game and this music plays, if not, you can always put it on yourself!

Question – do you think Lana is wearing something underneath that blouse???

Why is Stephanie f**k!n with Danny & Brie??? Didn’t she tell them to get away in a car? Now Steph is like – no – you can’t leave because you would be in breach of contract and the WWE title would be stripped away??? I’m telling you  – my hero Kane is gonna take off with Brie tonight!!! AND THENNNNNNNN!!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Ok here we go – Bertie Vs Danny in a traditional wrestling contest… I’m waiting for the FYRRRRRE!!!

Great contest by the two, but the FYYYYRE!!!! Brie & Danny run for the hills! Get in the car! Oh no where the keys at????? How the hell did Kane find himself in the car? Me ah tell yuh ah Brie him want! Why couldn’t Kane be in Total Divas???? It would be great!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Ok time for this Adam Rose dude…. let me see his wrestling skill, I heard that this dude is a don!

But not before the rematch for the Intercontinental Championship between Big E and Wade Barrett…. I’m sure it will be another great contest…but quite frankly…I GOT SOME BAD NEWS… I ain’t gonna talk about this sh!t!!!

No!!! A Mothers Day message from MR.T??? What a good thing WWE edited it! otherwise Raw would be on for another 3 hours!

ARRRRRRRRRGGGGGHHHH! DISRESPECT!!! Zeb Colter got a deportation list??? They got Sheamus and especially your heroine Paige??? Yeah, say WE THE PEOPLE NOW MUTHAF***A!!! THE INFAMOUS INFORMER HAS WON!!!! I told you – you cannot out think me! Zeb Colter doesn’t care about YOU!!!! You wait til I get on BDSIR Network…

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Adam Rose is a crazy muthaf***a!!!! Don’t be a Lemon Zeb, be a Rose bud! This dude gonna catch on quick star!

Ok so in this next episode of The Shield Vs The Wyatts, ever since Ric Flair gave The Shield props, Dean Ambrose has been using the figure 4 submission move… I think it’s safe for WWE to finally release The Miz now!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Just when The Wyatts were gonna get their @SS buss up, Evolution decide to pay a visit. TEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!! What was even more f**ked up, was that Evolution decided to use the triple powerbomb on Roman Reigns!

Less than 1 month until Payback… yo WWE, ever thought of re-assessing your TV rating??? I mean disturbing children on some children of the corn sh!t with Cena, tables on fire, My Hero Kane seemingly got the hots for Brie Bella… yeah I know, they are so much hotter when they are taken….Danny better get a particular set of skills! See what I did there?????

#VOCAREADREGNUM!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.

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The Jobber Blogger #104 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 1/5/14

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The Jobber Blogger

Isn’t life great when things feel like a Chore? Yup, it’s one of those weeks again. The Jobber Blogger flies in a day late, but currently I don’t know what to think about this old crazy thing we call “Wrestling”.

The WWE hasn’t been my thing for a long time, and I love TNA. I really do. In fact this week’s show had me rethinking that phrase over and over, “I love TNA!” But then you hear the horror stories, and the backstage rumours and politics, and people leaving, and you just think, what’s going on?

Christopher Daniels has left TNA, Kazarian is looking to leave, and most people think when his contract is up in a few weeks, or whatever it is, he will be gone too. Change is never a bad thing, TNA has filled the gaps with some great new talent, pushed some fantastic older talent, and it’s in a good place. I suppose people will look at this as “They’ve lost yet another TNA original”. But hey, this isn’t the first time Christopher Daniels has left TNA, and it’s not the first time Kazarian has either. Gail Kim left, Angelina Love left, Bobby Lashley left, hell even Jeff Hardy left. But they’ve all come back. Sometimes things just don’t “work”. Doesn’t mean anything is wrong on either side, other than those sides just aren’t running as parallel as they once were.

 

This is an exciting year for Wrestling and for Wrestling fans, Jeff Jarrett, the guy responsible for pouring everything into TNA, is bringing GFW to the world, hopefully by the end of the year. No doubt it’s a fair way off from being anything “spectacular”. But this is ground one, for those people who didn’t know of TNA from day one to jump on board. Competition is the life blood of any business, people are always going to draw comparisons, and it’s never about running anyone out of business, but if you’re not striving to be the best, then you’re doing it wrong. Clearly neither GFW or TNA have what it takes to battle the WWE, but the contrast, similarities and friendships surrounding TNA and the now growing “force” of GFW, it will be real interesting to see some familiar faces and cross over’s.

But hey, that’s distant future talk, this is the right here and now, and this week’s TNA: Impact… did it right. Impact Wrestling Logo

IMPACT WRESTLING – 1/5/14

Yup, we are in the Fifth month of the year, only a matter of weeks and we’re half way through the year, already. That’s crazy.

Impact kicked off with Eric Young fresh from retaining his Championship against Magnus at Sacrifice, looking for his next challenge. MVP keen on the idea pulled in Mr. Anderson, Gunner and Bobby Roode, as the three men who were victorious from Sacrifice. Here’s the thing I like, and yes this “spoils” it a little, but obviously storyline wise, it was Dixie Carter who screwed Bully Ray out of his Tables match, and so therefore MVP overlooked Bobby Roode’s victory. Yet allowed him to participate regardless. And they let Roode win. Roode defeated Gunner and went on to Challenge EY, that’s awesome. They in one move downplay his credibility, but then let Roode without cheating show how legit he is. I respect that. And that draws me into liking Roode (not that I’m not a big enough fan as it is).

To determine who battles EY, Anderson, Gunner and Roode each drew a Card, the two lowest numbers go to battle, and the highest number (Roode) faces the winner of the first match, with the winner of that match taking on Eric Young in the Main Event. A semi little tournament thrown together. And it’s great.

Sure Impact was a little “promo” heavy to kick off the night, and in all honesty I like it when Promo’s are unexpected.

Magnus made his way to the ring to moan about being left out of MVP’s little tournament. But Abyss stood in the crowd stalking his former “employer”. Yup, they still haven’t told us if Abyss is employed or not, which sucks. Mainly because he was never unemployed before. A good way to tell a story is to actually tell all of it, not just make stuff up that you never told and expect people to go along with it. Though I suppose we don’t have any choice but to go along with it.

Magnus and Abyss went at it, brawling, till Magnus escaped the fight. What was unexpected and most awesomely awesome was this guy I believe was called “Brad”. A scruffy British… scruff, and former good friend of Magnus who told him that he has lost who he is, and his suits are stupid. He even said Magnus is stupid and a shell of his former self, because now he has money and success, rather than going around pubs drinking looking like a homeless man. I think the word Brad was looking for, rather than “you’ve changed!” is “you’ve grown up”. Which I think is awesome about Magnus, and currently that puts him in a higher opinion for me, than he being some typical English drunken hoodlum. But new characters are always cool, especially with a violent “past”.

Going for the win for the most non-Wrestling segments on a Wrestling show this week did win, the third segment saw Bully Ray carrying a Table to the ring with “Dixie” spray painted across it. I do like however that Bully just brought it to the ring, pointed it out and pretty much said “By the end of the night, you’re going through that Table!”.

What I would have preferred is for this segment to just crash a Match, for no reason have Bully come out. That would work better for me, and break up the “chattiness”.
Anderson vs. Gunner

There really isn’t much to say about this. It was a rather short lived match. What did stand out to me though was Anderson. Anderson has been a little lost in the murky mid-cards since dethroning Bully Ray from The Aces and Eights. Whereas Gunner has been pushed to the Main Events, even battling for the World Championship.

Put them both together, despite that Anderson is the more experienced, Gunner still feels like he should be the betting man’s choice just given his recent Run. Yet having them both in the ring together, I found myself more on Anderson’s side. Which surprised me. I like Anderson a lot, I do think his best place was within The Aces and Eights, but he does seem to be in a better place recently, at least in his matches. He carried himself really well against Gunner, and that just makes me wish Anderson was perhaps given more room to be “Anderson” on a platform that meant something.

In a weird twist Ending, Storm got involved yes “again”… James Storm TNA business 2

Only Storm “missed” and ended up costing Anderson the match. He attempted his running kick to the back of the head in the Corner, but because Gunner reversed the momentum and threw Anderson in the Gunner, Storm ended up attacking Anderson, leading to the Hanger 18, and Gunner picking up the Victory.

Of course this pretty much just means Anderson is now going to feud with Storm and there is nothing else in it than that. But it’s a little lame that, that is the only way they can think of starting a rivalry. Though on the flip side, it’s far, far better than Angle’s “My son paints his face like Jeff”.

Seriously.
Ethan Carter the third vs. Spud – Exhibition Match

There is something superb about EC3 and Spud together, and Spud’s natural talent easily makes you like him the most, and more. EC3 is doing great work though, and he and Spud talking through the “don’t try this at home” speech was classic.

What was even better was Spud dressed as 2002 era Kurt Angle, shortly after having his head shaved. Angle Spud

Though to bring the mood down, Kurt Angle showed up, said he is finally going to face EC3 next week, and he’s going bring the pain.

What is a pain is Kurt Angle, he’s at the WWE return game again. When asked “if you were to go back to the WWE, who would you want to face” and his reply was “if?”.

That just pisses me off. And it pisses me off as a Fan, I’m sure there are a lot of people backstage in TNA who this just rubs the wrong way. Why pay a guy when he doesn’t want to be there. Get up, get packed, get out. Looking forward to when he’s gone if I’m honest, I like Kurt, I respect him, I respect his decision to go back, I understand it. Just don’t parade it everywhere, to me, it comes across incredibly insulting with regards to TNA, a company I care about. You don’t want to be there, fine, go away.
Gunner vs. Bobby Roode

Rather than having Gunner take on Roode straight after, and or Roode taking on EY straight after, there was a good bit of breathing room between every match.

Whilst on the topic of Gunner, I do want to say that they have done a great job with getting him over, and that he does a great job too. I still think there is more room to grow. It’s a little weird seeing someone as Scruffy as Gunner trying to get the crowd rallied and them behind him. He just doesn’t look like a “good guy”. He’s tough, built, battle tested, violent, scruffy looking. I honestly think if he tweaked his look to fit his Gimmick, he’d have something great. Go with the Army thing, I’d keep the colours, but change his attire. Make him a “warrior”. Gunner Warrior

His ring jacket is awesome, throw in some more unusual Wrestling attired but themed with the Army colours, add some Camouflage face-paint type of design, and you’re onto something pretty awesome.

Something I haven’t seen before was when Roode ran Gunner forward into the ropes, Gunner holds on, leans back causing Roode to fall and Roll backwards. Seen that plenty of times, but as Roode was rolling back onto his Knee’s Gunner had caught up with him and dropped him with a DDT. That was fantastic!

Though of course in the end Bobby Roode picked up the Win with his “Roode Bomb”. I do wish he chose a better name.

Dixie made her way to the ring after showing no concern to Bully Ray and his threats.

Dixie was surrounded by Security, three with her and a line to block the entrance way to the Ring. She was bragging about being the only woman in history to ever put Bully through a Table.

Long story short Bully came out, talked the Security round to getting out of his way, beat up on the Three guys in the ring and was face to face with Dixie.

After placing Dixie between his legs setting up for a Power-Bomb, MVP came out to stop the whole Segment.

I doubt they’d put Dixie through a table. I know they are wanting to build Bully as a big part of the show going into New York. No doubt having him against the Authority of Dixie is the plan. This is the problem with TNA, they recycle the same thing a few times without ever committing to an idea, and then it never see’s it’s true potential. Like they had an idea then changed their minds about who should be within it.

When Anderson first came back he was clashing with Dixie, and it was exciting, but never amounted to anything. AJ Styles, didn’t amount to anything. Most recently is of course Eric Young who was threatened to have a make-over, then didn’t amount to anything. And now it’s Dixie and Bully, which seems to at least have a direction. I think it’s the best choice so far, but who knows. Maybe Dixie will be going through a Table in New York?

Willow vs. Storm

This is one of those matches that feel “strangely placed”. Just having a Match on a card of this kind of clash, usually means something is in store to develop.

Especially considering they’ve been building Willow as a Character, but having him just come out to a Match, and come out first, feels a little strange.

I totally understand that Willow is a strange thing to get into, but I love it.

I think his theme is awesome, his look is awesome. And I love that Jeff is doing different moves under the mask. I know overall it’s pretty much the same onslaught. But it almost feels very old school Jeff Hardy with an unorthodox approach to high risk moves.

I hated Jeff’s adaption of the Twist-of-Fate which goes into a Stunner. I thought that sucked. I love the fall out Cutter, traditional move. However, currently as Willow, the Twist-of-Fate is done like the Stunner, only he holds onto the guy and stands back up himself. It’s weird, looks weird, and I like it.

Speaking of things I like, he did a Baseball slide and just slid out the ring in the same pose and dropped an Elbow drop on Storm who was on the floor! That was insane and awesome, and more of that!

The match escalated with the Steel Steps, and Storm reaching for his Beer Bottle, but Willow had his Umbrella…. yes that is a fair pairing.

Storm got pushy with the Ref, the match got thrown out and as Storm was leaving, guess what, Anderson got involved and Mic Check’d Storm to the floor.
DJ Z and The Bromans vs. The Wolves and Sanada

The Bromans had a good rant at MVP about how unfair Sacrifice was. And no, not for the last minute DQ rule, but for the 3 on 2 advantage they had, and it throwing off their offence and timing.

I actually didn’t write much down for this match, what I did Write was “FANTASTIC”.

This was a brilliant match, Wolves and Bromans have been tearing it up as it is, throw in Sanada and it was just fantastic.

People flying everywhere, great Tag-Team Wrestling, and how awesome are The Wolves?

This is the future of TNA, and it’s a future I am liking a lot!

Eddie Edwards dropped his Top-Rope foot-stomp on DJ Z to put him down, Sanada then landed his Moonsault and Davey Richards finished him off with the Final Foot-Stomp for the Win.

Watch This Match!

The Beautiful People – Beautiful Celebration.

Earlier on in the night Angelina had reportedly gotten a letter from the board of directors regarding her recent win as Knockouts Champion. Stating that now she is the champion she must show a more appropriate manor, for her actions reflect the Company.

Of course she and Velvet were not going to do that, and the main source of problems were of course their “attire”.

Angelina and Velvet turned up to this “celebration” in formal gowns, only to pretend to Strip off. By just removing their gloves, and then laughing about fooling everyone.

Yup, they wrote the letter themselves and used it to tease a striptease. I don’t see how any of this fits a Celebration.

Anyway, Gail Kim confronts Angelina, which is pretty awesome to have Gail turning face. She’s been Heel ever since she came back, and for her to represent the Knockouts Division makes sense, and so naturally she turns against those more “bad” than she is.

Gail goes on the attack, reaching for their Gowns to undress them, needless to say, they both escape.

But are then met by Brittany and Madison who Strip them both instead…. Yup, that happened.
Bobby Roode vs. Eric Young – World Heavyweight Championship

EY is awesome! I do fear he will be turned against, but he’s been a fan favourite for so long that I hope that isn’t the case. Having him front and centre and actively defending the belt is a good idea to keep him fresh and respected.

Not to mention that he with his awesomely wacky music amongst “EY” Chants, and standing tall on the Ropes holding the Belt over his head – it just works.

Earlier on in the night EY had a backstage interview where he said that Roode is the best guy to take Championship from him. Obviously the history between these two is great, and I’d actually really like that to be taken to a higher level.

Roode and EY feuding for a little while would be great.

Again going back to the fact that regardless of MVP playing dumb to Bobby Roode’s credibility, he himself backs it up, and so do those around him. I like that.

EY once again pulled out a Pile-Driver, which looked Horrible, though Roode obviously was fine. But still, it just unsettles me to watch.

EY kicked out of a Roode Bomb but in the end it was EY’s top-rope Elbow Drop which got him the victory.

A very good match between the both of them, but what was the best thing to happen, was EY extending his hand out to Roode, and picking him up.

Nothing more than that, but that was enough to make everyone feel good! Not sure what direction this is going in now, but I certainly like the mutual respect, and general respect being placed on Roode.

As much as this show was packed, next week looks to be a full card too!

EC3 vs. Kurt Angle

The Bromans vs. The Wolves – Tag-Team Championship – Ladder Match

and the Debut of The Menagerie

I am actually really looking forward to the Debut of Knux’s new stable of wild animals with a Circus, Carnival twist.

Till then,

Dan Wilkinson

www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

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The Jobber Blogger #103 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – SACRIFICE – 27/4/14

by DiVineDiablo

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The Jobber Blogger

I would like to start out with a Heart Felt “Thank You”, for your over whelming and out-pouring Birthday Wishes for me this past Monday. And by over-whelming, I mean… One.

But that one tickles my Senses like Spider-Man falling face first into a pit of Villains coats… and they had knifes and sowing kits within their hidden pockets! Scary stuff!

Yes TNA Sacrifice has been and gone, I am starting to feel like the names are “fine”, but they don’t really offer anything to say… “Sacrifice”. Maybe it’s time to shake things up and find a “Theme” for PPV’s such as these. Say a new “King of the Mountain” type of Match where the World Champion has the Deck stacked, and what would he, and his opponents “Sacrifice” for that Gold. IE their body, with crazy moves.

Crazy moves sums up Sacrifice, another Solid Bell to Bell PPV from TNA. Sure it has some “odd things” within it, but overall, TNA’s problem is never it’s product, the product is always good!

Sacrifice Logo

 TNA: SACRIFICE – 27/4/14

 Did you expect me to end the opening Paragraph rant with “the product is always good!”. Because I certainly didn’t. Speaking of me not certainly doing, didn’t, anything. I shall get back to that later!

Yes I decided to throw my face into my Hat and come out with some “Predictions”. So The Jobber Blogger shall play along as I told how stupid I was, and how awesomely right I am!

 The Bromans and DJ Z vs. The Wolves – 2on3 – World Tag-Team Championships

This one was a pretty safe bet. It’s been obvious since The Wolves debuted that they were the best Tag-Team going. It was only a matter of time before TNA paired them with the highest prize they could win.

Be right back, off to put on my Joggers!

Okay back, now equipped with Warmer clothing. The study in which I write The Jobber Blogger’s each and every week (or multiple times a week) is like an Arctic Tundra, filled with Eskimo’s coats with pocket knives and sowing kits in hidden compartments.

I actually didn’t expect the actions of recent weeks to lead to DJ Z being a factor in the match, but the 3 on 2 mentality clearly shows the lesser shall prevail.

True fact.

Speaking of DJ Z, he has since shaved the head which adorned the hair he was once loved, and has dyed it funky colours, like a Hip Jeff Hardy. He even colour-coordinated his attire to match that of his Team Mates.

I’ve always thought Zema was pretty good… but his “gimmick” sucked. I like him better with The Bromans, but he still doesn’t “click” as he’s found his true “form”. I like quotation marks… what of it.

Also due to the recent Tom Foolery from The Bromans, MVP had made the match a No DQ bout, but wanted to inform The Bromans once it’s Bell Time. So to do so Eddie Edwards had a little “note” from MVP with the ruling. Like the many, many… well every PE lesson I had for the last 2 years of School. Good ol MVP. No, don’t be silly… he didn’t get me out of PE. Now look at me, sitting down watching Wrestling, playing Video Games and Blogging…. bliss.

Edwards eventually got singled out, (as so often happens) what I thought was rather interesting was that Eddie and Zema seemed to exchange a good couple of Hard shots back and forth. One might think that there was some “bad blood” between them. But, it was probably just, whatever. Another scientific explanation.

whatever

In the end good old Davey Richards got the Tag and it was go time with The Wolves shifting it up a Gear. Their Tag-Team presence is fantastic, and I always talk about their Timing, but I can also say this, Davey Richards is one thing – Legit. Not to down play Eddie at all, but it’s so blatantly obvious, he is going to be over-shadowed, and fully eclipsed one day, the same eclipse to perhaps be The Wolves last howl?

That’s all poppy cock and whizz hardy! What is true is that The Wolves are the new TNA – Tag Team Champions. And properly this time, not like their “House show” victory title run mess.

This also means that I was right!

Jobber Blogger WIN

 Mr. Anderson vs. Samuel Shaw – Committed Match

Okay so when I wrote #102 of The Jobber Blogger, I didn’t even include Anderson vs. Shaw, it wasn’t mentioned on Impact aside from their continued “feuding”. It wasn’t till WrestleZone put up a post breaking down the Sacrifice card fully.

So I went back and amended it, but it didn’t state it was a “Committed Match”. The stipulation states the Winner. From the get-go I knew I was going to be wrong about Shaw winning. But up until that point Shaw had a fair number of victories over Anderson. I do believe Anderson won the last match, which meant this could go either way. Should it just be a match, I would have expected Shaw to possibly pick up an under-handed Win.

However if it’s a Committed match, then Anderson can’t lose. Just, impossible. He’s like Superman in this environment. Though if he did lose would be most interesting. Do they actually send their Talent to a Psychiatric Hospital? What would happen if Anderson actually had to endure that? Now that would be better.

Still, let’s just carry on shall we? Shaw does a good job of being the Crazy dude, though I do think it might limit his Wrestling abilities currently, I don’t even know if we’ve seen the last of him, or what is going to happen. Anderson seemed in good form, he’s always a bit hit and miss. But for this match he seemed on point. Very straight forward, very loud, very violent. It was good.

Shaw chocked out Anderson at one point and yet again started to pursue Christy, this just led to Anderson getting the upper hand and taking the fight to the back. He was pounding on the back of Shaw, and throwing him into the Guard Rails. I do remember Shaw was a bit of a risk taker, so he’s probably quite happy doing these spots, but still. Anderson then dropped him what looked rather hard, onto a Cart, which he then ran into some of those nicely placed storage boxes in the back. Shaw got a tiny bit of momentum back on his side till Christy showed up, Low-Blow’d him, and Anderson dropped him with a Mic Check to the floor / back of Van. Then threw him in and closed the doors.

Silly match, but if it has Storyline implications then it would be pretty cool. Wait and see.

Jobber Blogger LOSE

 Spud and Ethan Carter the third vs. Kurt Angle and Willow

 I found it hilarious when Kurt and Willow stood side by side. I know it’s Wrestling and all that. But Angle as the only guy to transition from Olympic Wrestling to Pro-Wrestling, it was just funny. He’s stood there, donned in his American Flag themed Attire, years of training, Olympic Gold, and here’s Jeff Hardy, jigging around, screaming like a woman and sliding across the floor with an Umbrella. Kurt…… you’ve made it.

Angle Willow

I do believe this got a fair bit of “Boring” chants at the start, but I do feel it was to do with the opening part of the match. Not that the crowd didn’t want to see it, but I do have a problem with the crowd, which I was address later on when it’s more relevant.

Spud had his fair share of chants too, which is awesome. It shows he is really coming into his own, and there is no doubt that his popularity is going to grow. I think movements like that only work when they aren’t played upon. The second the becoming acknowledged, they become irrelevant. A hard balance EY is going to face going forward.

What was cool though was Willow jumping off the Top Rope with his Umbrella…. admittedly he did just land straight on the floor with EC3 and Spud barely softening his landing at all. But then, that also makes it slightly funnier.

Funny is probably is how this is best described, EC3 even hit a Stinger Splash, the screaming “wooo” and everything. It wasn’t acknowledged by Taz or Tenay, but it certainly tickled my humorous horn.

Spud eventually got singled out, Willow did the whole “Twist of Fate / Stunner” thing, Angle did a modified half way through Angle Slam, but Jeff’s Swanton for the Win was awesome, it barely gave him any leaping room, so he just jumped vertically and shifted in mid air to land it for the Win, awesome!

Though it is annoying, like IGN’s own Matt Fowler pointed out, Willow is being “Jeff Hardy” more than he is Willow.

Jobber Blogger WIN

 Tigre Uno vs. Sanada – Best of x3 – Final Match – X-Division Championship

The problem with the Best of x3, is there is always going to be 3 matches. Which would be cooler if say Sanada won on Match #2. That’s why a Best of x5 gives you more wiggle room to build momentum and desperation.

Either way, a great pairing and some great matches. But this, this was the best.

The match we’ve been waiting for from these two.

Uno locked in this crazy looking Submission, trapping Sanada’s head between his legs, and tying up his legs whilst pulling on his Arm. It just looked… crazy. Most submission holds usually show a sign of some form of Wiggle room, this just looked nasty.

I genuinely thought Sanada might be hurt multiple times through-out this match, which I guess comes with the territory of Uno’s Lucha Libre style, mixed with the X-Division, and PPV level.

Uno dived over the ropes, looking as if one of his knees landed hard on the top of Sanada’s head, causing him to instantly grasp and point at his collar bone.

This of course doesn’t sell Sanada short, who is great in his own ways, but if anyone stood tall in this environment, it was Uno.

Uno’s Capture/Cradle Suplex-DDT thing is insane. We saw it last week on Impact, but it’s an insane move. This took Sanada out, setting him up for his Sabre Tooth Splash, but missed, leaving Sanada to hit one of the most powerful Moonsaults I’ve seen in recent memory and taking the win.

The problem I have with this match is simple, The Crowd.

Part of the reason I love TNA, is because it makes you feel like you’re a part of the “grown up” Wrestling community. Sure you have kids watching and you have idiots.

I remember watching TNA live in Manchester last year, and the people in front were swearing and yelling all kinds of insulting derogative things towards the Knockouts. Now granted, you can dislike Women’s wrestling, I didn’t for a long time. The WWE’s Women’s Division was always so terrible. Now the Knockouts can struggle here and there, but over all they can go like no other Wrestling Company has let their Women perform at.

So you have these great new talents in TNA, and I for one love seeing a Mexican and Japanese style enthused in the mix of the American / British wrestling ensemble TNA offers.

Which makes me annoyed when you have such idiots in the crowd sayings “Let’s go Goku”.

I can appreciate and laugh at all kinds of jokes, and remarks. But when it’s blatant disrespect, that annoys me from an Audience I am so passionate about.

Uno and Sanada have had some of the best matches in recent memory, and for my money, this match was the match of the night. I can’t say enough good things about it, and I just hope that it would encourage a respectful crowd. Rather than distance themselves to a formality we’ve seen for years.

Jobber Blogger WIN

 James Storm vs. Gunner – I Quit Match

There is only one complaint I have about this whole feud, and it’s the stupid re-use of that crap we have every time a Team breaks up, and in TNA, that’s very often.

“THEY WERE ONCE LIKE BROTHERS!”

No they weren’t, didn’t you watch the show?

And if they were, then clearly them fighting makes them more like Brothers. Why do they need to be Brothers to sell me on a feud, they don’t like each other, jealousy, whatever, who cares, FIGHT!

It’s Wrestling damn it!

I know it’s not a recent thing, but Storm obviously has been doing different things with his hair recently, should I comment on that? I notice these things. But also he has gone for a more Goatee look with snazzy Sideburns, rather than the full beard he once had. And Gunner another guy with a big beard has now trimmed his down to a much thinner Goatee. I do wonder if that is to make EY stand out as the guy with a Big Beard. Seeing as how Dixie invented it… and half of her Roster have them.

While I was fairly sure Gunner would eventually win this match, I was pleased at just how violent and aggressive The Cowboy was.

It was a brutal match, everything you would expect from an I-Quit match. It is hard to think of different ways to end such a match that we haven’t seen before. This, which is a very similar ending to AJ Styles vs. Tommy Dreamer, and Jeff vs. Matt Hardy, when Jeff tied Matt to a Table and climbed to the Top of a Ladder, and of course could see what was going to happen next and Quit the match.

I do look forward to more creative ways to finish these types of Matches. But there is one thing that they will always have in common. Brutality.

Gunner must have bladed first, but Storm smashed a Beer Bottle over his head, and the second he hit the mat he had a cut. It looked pretty good… in the sadistic way that Wrestling provides this Story Telling.

Storm wasn’t done, ripping the Belt from the Ref and trapping Gunner in the Ropes, he violently attacked him, whipping his back constantly till he just stumbled backward into a ferocious Last Call Superkick.

Again, this match didn’t play in Storms favour, but it did solidify him as the Badass Heel I want him to be. You wouldn’t want to mess with this guy, that makes him a great counter balance to Eric Young. And I stand by that.

Still, Gunner built his momentum by smashing his head into the Turn Buckles, the ending came when they played the Two Steel Chairs set up front to front ala Lockdown. Only this time Gunner placed a Guard Rail between the Two Stains and Superplexed the Cowboy straight onto it. Very little give, and Storm’s injuries following show that he has some fractures and bruising. Gunner wasn’t done and picked up a Shard of Glass from the Beer Bottle and placed it against the Forehead of Storm, which is of course when he Quit.

Another great match.

Jobber Blogger WINAngelina Love (w/Velvet Sky) vs. Madison Rayne – Knockouts Championship

The Knockouts seem to silent the Crowd as of late. I don’t know why that is. Maybe they’re not paying attention, maybe bored. Maybe in awe. Who knows.

Angelina of course controlled the majority of the match, though I did add another note of her being awesome.

Make Over Predator

Madison hit the “Rain-Drop /Rayne-Drop” ?? Then set up Angelina for the spear, she hit nothing but turnbuckle post, which led to Angelina connecting with her Botox Injection running Axe-Kick. It’s such an awesome move for a Knockout to use also, plus plays well to Angelina’s Long Legs and Big boots. Which should be a Cover of Storm’s old Longnecks and Rednecks.

In the end Angelina attempted a Top Rope cross-body which she missed. Madison then connected with a Spear, but Velvet played the deciding factor, spraying Hairspray in the eyes of Madison as she stumbled back into a Roll Up and Victory for Angelina Love. The x6 Time Record Breaking Knockouts Champion!

Jobber Blogger WIN

Bully Ray vs. Bobby Roode – Tables Match

Bully cut a really good “Bully Ray” styled promo going into the match, probably could have done without the Double Sledge through a Table though. Having Bully hit a table and break it, to me, makes the Tables look weak, not make Bully look Strong.

At first I thought Gunner and Storm would take a higher place on the Card than this match, but I guess with the Storyline implications in place it makes sense. But Bully felt like Bully in this match, coming down to a huge “Tables, Tables, Tables” chant as his music played and he got Face to Face with Roode. It just cemented that Big Match feel.

Sure the crowd were chanting sh*t factor at Roode, but then Roode is the best, so it doesn’t really count. Also –

Roode Swearing

Sums it up

Tables matches also suffer from what I said was the problem last time, one Table just isn’t enough.

Bully was trying to Powerbomb Roode through a Table, he countered Twice, but on the Third time the Ref got knocked down and Roode went through the Table. Which obviously didn’t count Oh, the irony. Is that even ironic? I don’t know.

It’s almost cartoonish levels of stupidness when the Ref’s going flying these days, but people just think “meh… Wrestling”. Not “do something different”.

Bully placed Roode on the two tables side by side on the outside, Bully then made his way up the Turnbuckle when a skinny bearded bloke pushed him off through the Tables. Of course, the Ref saw Bully go through the Tables and Roode took the Win.

I should really start betting more on Roode. I always want him to win, and he does. Yet I don’t think he will.

Regardless, of course my joke from a few weeks back was actually True… and now it’s insignificant, so yay.. and Damn you, go out to Dixie Carter.

Donned as a rodey, screwed Bully out of this match. Obviously he didn’t lose anything aside from a Tables match being “his speciality” and just the pain of going through Tables.

Dixie Beard

Jobber Blogger LOSE

 Magnus vs. Eric Young – World Heavyweight Championship

I don’t think EY is losing popularity yet, but I wouldn’t be surprised for it to start happening. Apparently it’s already happening with Daniel Bryan, but it always does. When it goes from being “our thing” to everyone’s thing, people resent it. They almost done feel Worthy anymore.

Which is why a legit push for an awesome talented Heel always works better, and continues to work. When you change that Heel to be a face, it just doesn’t work anymore.

EY was talking about how he gets motivated when the Crowds chant “Go EY Go, Go EY Go!” a Chant I’ve never heard. To me it sounds like TNA are really pushing Chants and Crowd interaction to create “movements”. Here’s a thing, let it happen… don’t make it happen.

Also Magnus called himself Wreck-it-Ralph for some reason….

The Main Event though didn’t feel like anything was going to be “sacrificed” and I don’t even feel like Magnus really felt like a true contender. Probably with the lack of Build up and announcements that he would actually be cashing in his Rematch.

But what was really good about the Main Event, is that it was a Wrestling Match. No fancy gimmicks, no silly ending, no weapons, no Ref’s flying around. It was just EY vs. Magnus – Wrestling Match – World Championship. Simplicity, and perfect.

EY has easily shifted his game into the highest possible gear since being Champion, EY has always been a great Wrestler, but it’s his time to show everyone, he has always been a great Wrestler.

The match kicked off with some great Headlock take-downs by EY, and the Wrestling continued from there. Magnus’ patented Re-bound from Ropes Clothesline was on point, so was EY’s Top-Rope Moonsault, even though he missed.

Magnus caught EY from the Top Rope and dropped him down in his “Driver” manoeuvre for a Kick-out.

This led him to grab a Crowbar of sorts, only for it to be taken from him, and attempted a Low-Blow on EY whilst the Ref had his back turned, EY countered, dropped him with the Pile-Driver for yet another Kick-out this time from Magnus.

Alas, EY eventually Caught Magnus one last time with yet another Pile-Driver, followed it up with his Top-Rope Elbow rope and retained his World Championship in impressive form.

It’s a shame that the Main Event was “built” more, but the actual match quality no doubt made up for it. It at once secures Magnus as credible, and secures Eric Young, as Worthy.

Jobber Blogger WIN

Over-all Sacrifice was a top quality PPV. Not quite sure where things are going to go from here on out. Certainly Bully Ray and Bobby Roode / Dixie Carter aren’t done by a long-shot. Knux is returning to impact with his Girl-Friend “Rebel” along with his friends, Crazy Steve and The Freak. A new Stable, perhaps a kin to the Wyatt family?

Certainly exciting to see what happens going toward Slammiversary.

Though on a closing note, as legit as it might be for Wrestlers to lose to a Pile-Driver, and how TNA can be different to use it. I still feel uncomfortable to witness it. It’s not worth the risk, on the odd occasion, perhaps. This regularly, I’d rather they didn’t.

Of course that isn’t my call.

What did you think to Sacrifice? Did you like it? What didn’t you like? Who did you pick to Win?

Let me know in the Comments below or head on over to Facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind and let your Voice be heard!

Till then,

Dan Wilkinson

www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

www.TheSteelChair.com

TNR Cover 12 (w facebook address)

www.cageamateursuk.com/News.php

The Jobber Blogger #102 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING 24/4/14

 by 

 

Jobber Blogger 102 Banner

It just dawned on me that I chose the Wonderful 101 as a Header for my Blog Post last week, rather than the infamously more famous..ly, 101 Dalmatians. I came to this realisation by thinking about the fact that I needed something for 102… like 102 Dalmatians. Which I’ve also never seen.

I’ve seen the first one, I meant I haven’t played the Wonderful 101. Long story short, as it is wide and thin. Also Brief. Impact hailed from… some place this week, and it was yet again a lovely mixture of things! Some good Wrestling, some weird Segments, and for a go-home show (the last show before Sacrifice) it did a pretty good job of setting the table.

Not like the crazy Victorians and the 102 items of their cutlery ensemble-monstrosity they deemed “essential”.

Impact Wrestling Logo

Impact Wrestling – 24/4/14

Magnus kicked off Impact, yay for talking segments! : slow clap : It’s a little weird that this is the first time we’ve seen Magnus since he lost The World Championship two weeks ago, even stranger given the fact the Rematch is taking place as Sacrifice’s Main Event.

But alas, it wasn’t Eric Young Magnus wanted to chew out, but his old Buddy, old Pal, Abyss. Abyss obviously was hired by Magnus to have his back, and by Magnus logic, that’s also a relevant form of logic, like the over-used “Magnus Rules”. Abyss’ contract was with him, and not TNA, and therefore MVP couldn’t fire Abyss even if he did get involved.

Magnus Logical

When did Abyss not have a TNA contract?

Who cares, what is important is that Magnus threatened Abyss with the Turnbuckle he held in his hand. Which was pretty neat, never actually seen what the Hook / Rope holder part looks like in its full glory. He also referred to it as Mr. Turnbuckle, which took off as a Chant, which makes me so very happy!

Quick side note, Magnus goes crazy and draws a face on Mr. Turnbuckle and takes him everywhere with him…. I should write the show.

Mr Turnbuckle

Think of the T-Shirts!

I am a Merchandising machine! Often called a Printer.

Long story brief, (there’s a throw back! Ooooh yeah! Snailed It!” Anywho, Magnus declared Abyss “Fired” from Magnus Enterprises, yes the very same Enterprises that contains both Magnus Logic and Magnus Rules…

Magnus Enterprises

This just writes itself.

So with Abyss now fired from Magnus, and not employed, he can’t “touch” Magnus without a lawsuit, so of course MVP makes the match between them both, and if Abyss wins, he gets a Full-Time contract. Okay it bugs me that for some reason he’s not on the Roster… when he most clearly is. Wrestling gibberish crap!

Or of course the more commonly placed phrase

WrestlingDribbleSauceSpectacular

Kurt Angle vs. Spud

EC3 gave Spud the pep talk as per usual, and how lovely it was… as per usual. We’ve seen Spud referred to as the Lion, the Tigre, the Hunter, but today, he was going to be the Giselle!

Spud Animals

Though even a Giselle would come across more fearsome than Kurt Angle’s moniker of The Machine!

Kurt Machine

Should of specified what type of Machine

I should write this show.

I don’t think Angle is back to full health yet from his recent surgery, hence the brace, and hence the fact that he and Spud didn’t really do too much. Though Angle is of course impressive, or as impressive as continually injuring yourself can be.

Angle quickly picked up the win over Spud, in what I think was a Tap-Out victory. My attention spam wondered off as my new batch of Marvel Mascot Figures arrived!

Marvel Mascots

EC3 then jumped Angle straight after the Bell and Willow came down to help out. And so, Willow and Angle vs. EC3 and Spud at Sacrifice is now a Thing. Again, I think it adds a good match, kills two feuds with one Match, and gives Angle room to recuperate.

Though I do wish Willow wasn’t as “buddy buddy” and was violent toward Angle too, and everyone.

Kenny King vs. Bobby Lashley

King yet again was getting on MVP’s nerves as he sat waiting in MVP’s office, trying to once again get on the show. And in true Wrestling naffness, MVP said he had a “Big opponent” for him. I do find it funny that Lashley made a cool return, and has barely been seen since.

I almost forgot he was on the Roster. Though he has a pretty decent Theme, and he can actually Wrestle, and he’s very damn good at it. He’s like a talented credible Rob Terry.

Lashley train

This was actually a decent matchup between both King and Lashley, I mean that in the terms of the pairing between them both together in the ring. The match itself was excellent, and I’d like to see them go at it without the silly “ending”.

Also it bugged me a little that the Ref was stopping Lashley’s strikes. I get that it’s “not in the rules”, but it sticks out so much when a Ref does something which they never, ever, ever, ever, ever, ever do in any other match. It makes it blatantly obvious where the match is going.

Still, something I’ve never seen before was King jumping for a Over-Head neckbreaker from the second Rope I think, possibly the top-rope. Yet he was caught, and Full-Stop caught by Lashley in his delayed Suplex. Lashley didn’t even Stumble, he just Caught him, held him, walked with him, dropped him. Fantastic move.

King then rolled out the Ring and took a Count-out Loss. So hoping these two lock horns again soon.

Austin Aries vs. MVP

This was my most anticipated match of the night, and it was great. It was one of the matches you just watch, and make very little notes. Which goes into my file of “just watch it”.

It perhaps wasn’t the best these two can do, but I am fully sure it’s just a taster to whet one’s appetite.

It’s been too long without Aries on TV, or just without Aries. I don’t see him rising to the Top of the Roster anytime soon either, which is a shame. Though EY should easily have a decent Run, and if he doesn’t drop the belt to Storm, then it should go to Aries, without it being all “Storyline” rubbish, just Aries vs. Young – and have a True, Fantastic Wrestling match, where Aries would take the gold no doubt.

I can’t tell you how much I am looking forward to Destination X, I want the X-Division Championship to become relevant and important, and having all of these top guys gunning for that Belt so they can cash it in, that’s something I can’t wait for.

Aries attempted his 450 Splash, missed MVP who managed to roll out the way and connected with his Yakuza kick for the Win.

James Storm and Bobby Roode vs. Bully Ray and Gunner

Here is something that worries me, Tenay kept referring to Bully and Gunner as this “New Team”. The title “New Team” scares the hell out of me. I don’t want another Throw-Together Team. Specially of developed Stars. Aries and Roode, worked. But Gunner and Bully, not a chance. You don’t spend time putting over Gunner to build him as a Top Talent, then throw him into the murky Tag-Team waters with Bully Ray. Bully Ray should not be in any other team. It’s just a No-Go territory.

So I hope it’s just a random / here and there pairing, rather than them going forward as Tag-Team Contenders.

And on the flip side, this is my problem with Storm and Roode. I like most everyone else would love a Beer Money reunion. And currently they are both at least on talking terms, so it could work. They always said they never liked each other, but respected each other and worked brilliantly together. They can play on that success more than ever now. So if that’s the direction they chose, then awesome.

But what I want is simple. Eric Young should remain World Champion, and he’s now the Top Face in the Company. The Top Heel is now James Storm. I don’t care how anyone else looks at it, yes Magnus is in the Main Events but Magnus is not a convincing “Bad Guy”.

James Storm is a “Bad Guy”. He will Smash a Beer Bottle over your Dad’s head. He’s “Not Sorry” anymore. Not to mention his new Theme and Look cement that darker persona. He’s the kind of Heel you want in the Main Events, least who I want. He’s the kind of guy who will walk up to you and Punch you in the Mouth and never back down. Magnus will walk away from fights, run away from Problems. Storm currently is the Heel who doesn’t back down, doesn’t run away and will bring the fight to you… and Win. He’s who I want in the Main Event, he’s the perfect counter Balance to Eric Young. Both TNA originals.

And if they’re not going to do that…then Beer Money. But Storm should be in the Main Events.

It seems the fact that Gunner likes to use the Diving Head-Butt is reason enough to pair him with Bully. The whole What’s-Up motion later and Gunner is setting up Roode on a Table outside. Bully does a horribly timed Elbow Drop from the Apron and puts himself through the Table.

Gunner drops Roode with the Hanger 18 only to turn around to a vicious Last-Call Super-Kick from Storm who picks up the Win.

Bully and Roode do battle at Sacrifice in a Tables Match, which I hope Roode wins. Though there’s a good chance he won’t.

Storm and Gunner do battle in an I-Quit match at Sacrifice, where again, I hope Storm wins. I feel like he won’t, but I really hope he does. If he does, then it’s Main Events.

Mr. Anderson took a Road Trip to Samuel Shaw’s house, where upon Arrival found a rather forward and flirty Red Headed Mrs Shaw called Christy.

Anderson then had a nosey around in Samuel’s bedroom in the basement, which didn’t look abnormal in the slightest, just a normal Bedroom. Only it was in the “basement”. I thought it looked nice. I don’t get what was weird about it.

Anyway, Samuel turned up home and attacked Anderson, in a very “Paranormal Activity” type of way the Camera man ran up stairs to find Mrs Shaw, followed by heavy footsteps coming from behind. Which was Samuel, a bit bloodied and battered who then cuddled his Mum, and we don’t know where Anderson is.

Aside from in the basement. I like the idea… see where it goes.

In the same kind of madness, we saw what I guess was the final Knux video. Where he is sat with people watching this girl dance with Fire. Then they both decide they won’t leave each other’s side again. And Knux tells her he has to come back to Impact Wrestling, and so she says she is going with him.

So really… what was the point. Put the events together, Knux misses his old Sweetheart, travels home to find her. He finds her, she’s pissed because he left and his Fathers Fair is ruined from a flood. Knux reconnects a relationship with her and his Father, both pissed he left and that his life is here with them. He decides to stay and help clean up the mess from the flood, but then leaves back to Wrestling, taking her with him away from his Father’s struggling profession.

What?

I don’t understand how any of this makes any sense with regards to Knux in the future. What would have been cool is if we saw his Bikes, or Aces and Eights cut etc, and mentions of how he left with the Gang, and how that effected his Family. That would have been neat, but no mention of it. He was in a Car too.

I should Write this show. – Also the music in these segments are awesome!

The Beautiful People vs. Gail Kim and Madison Rayne

Earlier on in the night The Beautiful People claimed they were going to give Madison a much needed “make-over”. Madison then hit the ring calling them both out. Blah blah blah, Madison apologised, then attacked them, they beat her up, Brittany tried to help, got her ass kicked, then they put the Bag with Angelina’s face on it, on Madison.

Not much of a Makeover. Though it does make me think that they should move their talents to other parts of the World too, not just Women in TNA.

Make Over Spidey

Gail Kim then confronted Madison claiming that although they aren’t friends anymore, Gail isn’t a fan of what The Beautiful People are doing to the Knockouts Division, and thus, they joined forces.

Also Brittany apparently suffered a “Concussion”, and she’s doing this weird Stalker thing with Madison, ala Mickie James / Trish Stratus.

It was a shame that the Crowd were rather quiet for the duration of the show, but unfortunately if you Tape multiple shows back to back, it does start to wear a little thin.

Either way, the match was really good, which is something awesome about TNA. Not to mention Velvet is far better as a Heel. And I can’t tell you how happy I am Angelina is back!

Madison Speared Velvet but Angelina rolled up Madison from behind straight after, holding the “trunks” for a 3-Count Victory.

There was this weird Video of being down in the Drains, with Water pouring in and Running rats above. It didn’t last long nor did it develop to anything. So no idea if that was part of the show or not. I shall try and find out and include a Video Link if I do.

Either way, it was pretty cool, I like weird things, especially if it means new Wrestlers… specially Weird ones.

Although I find nothing relevant to it…. o.O so maybe I imagined it.

Magnus vs. Abyss

Eric Young joined Taz and Tenay on commentary, which is the first time we’ve seen the World Champion all show. Which kind of sucks, I think the World Champ needs to used far more. Just something to keep him fresh, else they quickly become insignificant.

Magnus and Abyss didn’t Wrestle for very long before Magnus just threw it out with a blatant Low-Blow on Abyss to counter the Chokeslam. This of course went down as a DQ, so technically Abyss won, whether that means he gets back on the TNA Roster Full-Time is unknown.. given that he never left the Roster! Arghh madness!

Magnus then went crazy with a Steel Chair, EY ran in to stop Magnus, but did no good. As Magnus then just beat down on both EY and Abyss with the Chair.

I actually really like that as an ending, though it is a little bit like Triple H beating down Daniel Bryan before Mania. But who’s paying attention… o.O

TNA: Sacrifice is Live Tonight in the US, and Wednesday in the UK!

I hope to have my Write-Up done by Wednesday for all you Jobber Blogger fans!

But to get you interested, this is how the Card looks!

Mr. Anderson vs. Samuel Shaw

The Wolves vs. The Bromans – (handicap 3 on 2) – World Tag-Team Championships

Kurt Angle and Willow vs. EC3 and Spud

Gunner vs. Storm – I Quit Match

Bobby Roode vs. Bully Ray – Tables Match

Angelina Love vs. Madison Rayne – Knockouts Championship

Sanada vs. Tigre Uno – Best of x3 – Final Match – X-Division Championship

Eric Young vs. Magnus – World Heavyweight Championship

My picks are:

Shaw win

The Wolves win

Kurt Angle and Willow win

Gunner win

Roode win

Angelina Love win

Sanada win

Eric Young win

For you long-time readers out there, I have changed my opinions of who might Win. Let’s see if I’m right!

Till then!

Dan Wilkinson

www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

The Jobber Blogger #101 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 17/4/14

April 20, 2014 by 

Jobber Blogger logo 101

A whole week later and the big news has had time to sink in. No, not the Undertaker losing, that’s been more than a week. Of course it was last week’s TNA related big news, no not Eric Young, but The Jobber Blogger’s 100th Issue, which was viewed… on facebook, a few times. No idea if anyone clicked on the link or read it! Whoop! Rolling in style!

So here we are at aptly named “Wonderful 101”, if anyone knows Video Games you probably hate me a little more now. No, I’ve never played the game, I just know it’s name… Wii U.

A different name for a different thing.

But one thing that shall remain with the same name currently going forward, is the same thing that existed prior with the same name, now entering its own brand new, “Century” of Wrestling dribble-sauce Spectacular!

Ladies and Gentleman! The Jobber Blogger! :bows gracefully and trumps a little:

WrestlingDribbleSauceSpectacular

 

Impact Wrestling Logo

TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 17/4/14

The Wrestling world has been all about Eric Young winning the “big one”, and while some TNA fans seem to resent the possibilities of TNA copying the WWE, they are without question… stupid.

It is blatantly obvious, though TNA have put forward it has all to do with Eric’s upcoming season of “Off the Hook”… which stinks of a smelly pile of Hook Fish B-S. Though no doubt, it does play a part.

Face of the matter is this, Eric Young deserves it, reasons or not, the Wrestling World is happy, they love EY and they respect EY. Now let’s hope he has a Title Run to be proud of.

Speaking of EY, Impact kicked off with the New World Champ addressing his Victory. And that he being a World Champion to be proud of, is his way of Paying Back the Fans for their “10 years of unsolicited support for me, and this is payback for you guys”

For those of you wanting a little Tickle Kick – Unsolicited “things you receive that you do not ask for, and may not want”.

So swings and roundabouts with that one

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EY has vowed to Defend the Championship, wherever against whoever and whenever. If only he could attack the dude in the Golf Course again, or Pin D’Lo Brown in the Newsagents.

The good old days.

Alas, things can’t stay good forever, and Dixie Carter makes her way back to confront EY.

Now, I watched TNA on and off a good few years ago, but the “Don’t Fire Eric” movement is something I missed. I guess they are pulling parallels to that Movement and the Yes movement of today. Similar for sure. Though EY did sport the big beard first, it’s all irrelevant really.

But I am happy to hear that Dixie Carter was the one who made the Beard Fashionable, for years no one would believe me, but I swore it true, and finally she has admitted it to be so!

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A whole load of “Puke Bags / Unemployed Lumberjack” remarks later, Dixie wants to give EY a Make-Over, and if not him, then ODB… ideally both.

Bully Ray made his way to the ring, and in an interesting moment, kept mentioning last week’s bizarre finish to his and Dixie’s segment in the ring with the Table. Though, there is still no conclusion on what actually happened. Dixie left and Bully said he Respects and Likes Eric Young. Which is good, I fully believe that came from the heart. Bully is respected by pretty much everyone, is work ethic is untouchable, so his endorsement speaks volumes.

My problem is Dixie, I love Dixie of course and I like her Heel Persona. But part of the reason to shift things to MVP was to change things up, if Dixie is still on TV, being the same as she was before and holds higher power over everyone regardless of the fact MVP now controls “Wrestling Operations”… then nothing has changed?

Though an Eric Young vs. The Boss (authority) Make-Over thing, it still speaks too many parallels. But should make for interesting TV.

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Velvet Sky (w/Angelina Love) vs. Madison Rayne – Street Fight

TNA are most definitely pushing their “Hardcore” styling’s, and this isn’t the first Street Fight for the knockouts in recent memory. Maybe they’re trying to make the product a bit more edgy, and appeal back to those fans. Not to mention Taryn Tarrell is on the ready for a come-back soon, so no doubt having more crazy Knockouts matches is a good way to bring her back into the fold. Certainly hope she comes back on the heels of the Push she left on.

The Beautiful People have been better and better week after week, and this is their best showing to date. Which is good news, because the match between Velvet and Madison was great too, cooking sheets to the head, nasty bumps into the Steel Steps, they weren’t holding anything back.

Though as one would expect, Angelina’s involvement was the deciding factor, but in a nice swerve it led to the Downfall of Velvet, giving Madison some much needed momentum as she battles her former faction, adding more to the upcoming Title Match for Sacrifice, which I would bet 100%, Angelina is walking out with the Knockouts Championship.

MVP took the time to Congratulate Eric Young on his World Championship Victory, but also wanted to Address the situation of one – Samoa Joe. Joe obviously had his fair share of World Championship Matches, but was then kept out of the Battle Royal due to some sort of…. altercations. A whole load of story nonsense, though let’s be honest, Joe had what, 3 Title Matches, and lost every one of them. Aside from the fact that MVP banned Abyss, and really left Magnus out on his own, and Joe never got that chance, no one really cares. I started to get behind another Samoa Joe title run, and then I got bored and now I’m glad he’s out of the picture and the belts on EY.

What I didn’t expect, was Austin Aries to turn up, but oooooooooooooooooh Doctor, I bet TNA fans everywhere were smiling at the return of Aries.

Now I read that apparently Aries was in the “dog-house” for something backstage, but I don’t know if that was Storyline either. MVP played it off on the fact that Aries double crossed MVP and joined up with Team Roode. Which would make sense.

At the end of the day, nobody cares, despite Joe’s apparent “disgruntle’d-ness” Aries said it best when he claimed he is:

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Of course things heated up, and Aries and MVP are set for Battle next week. Which aside from it being Aries vs. MVP which is exciting, just having Austin Aries back, and in any match is enough to get some people to tune in.

He’s back everyone!…. least currently.

The Wolves vs. The Bromans (w/DJ Z) – World Tag-Team Championship

Given how the last few weeks have gone, it was somewhat obvious where things would go this week. Though part of me did think perhaps The Wolves would pick up the gold then defend at Sacrifice, but on their current course, they are still set to Win at Sacrifice… is my prediction.

Anywho, something that I thought was interesting, remember WWE’s Zack Ryder, who had a short lived “movement” of his own and people then drew similarities between he and Robbie E. Where look where they both are now, Robbie E is still being used well in TNA, as one half of the World Tag-Team Champions.. and Zack Ryder is… pretty much gone. Awesome.

Also Dolph Ziggler to TNA. Needs to happen.

I can’t tell you enough how much I love having DJ Zema at ring-side with his noise making glory-ness throughout the Broman’s matches, it’s brilliant. And of course, Brilliant sums up The Wolves, with their yet again on point accuracy and speed, a fantastic, fantastic team.

The Wolves were in the driver’s seat to Victory, when DJ Z| attacked with his Laptop, getting another DQ and the Bromans escaping with the Belts.

Whilst on the topic of The Wolves, check out my home-made Wolves banner! Nothing like a good bit of self promotion!

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Ethan Carter the third and Rockstar Spud vs. Willow – Handicap Match

This was a rather short match, and I am still on the fence with “Willow”, I love it a lot, and then dislike it still at the same time. The more obvious it is that it’s Jeff, the worse the gimmick. The more he separates it, the better it is.

Still, that Entrance and theme, is awesome. I love the look too, aside from Arm bands and Hardy shirt.

Also Spud got some chants, which is brilliant too, I love Spud, and I am so happy he is where he is. It seemed like TNA might never use him, and he’d just disappear from the Roster some day. But Spud is a main stay, and shines in front of the Camera. There’s a lot of talk about EC3, I like him, but I’m not as sold on him as others are. That being said, his backstage interactions with Spud are getting better and better.

Willow dropped Spud with the Twist of Fate and picked up the Win, EC3 then went straight on the attack, leading into his “Leg Submission” which is when Kurt Angle made his Return to Impact.

EC3 and Spud ran away and Kurt made a little speech about how when he’s done with EC3, he won’t need to be carried out on a Stretcher, but in a Body-Bag. Which gives you an idea that Kurt and EC3 will probably lock horns at Sacrifice, with some kind of Stipulation.

Tigre Uno vs. Sanada – Best of 3 Series – Match Two – X-Division Championship

We had our first Video Promo for Sanada, which as you would expect was all about The Great Muta, and he placing his entire trust in Sanada to get the job done. Quite clearly these two are going to clash, probably at Slammiversary.

Also I freaking love Tigre Uno, his mask is great, as his is general attire. The things he does in the ring are fantastic, and which I’ve never seen. I can’t wait for a match where he puts it all on the line to impress. No doubt Match 3 with Sanada.

Plus both of their Entrance Themes are awesome. I don’t want either of them to leave, I know Uno is signed with TNA, and Sanada is on a “limited” deal.

Kenny King made a speech about being left out once again. Then joined Commentary with Taz and Tenay.

I believe that Sanada paid tribute to one AJ Styles, which seemed to draw little reaction. He did the whole “duck under Uno running the ropes, leap frog on his return then Drop Kick on the rebound”, including Styles’esk taunt. So that was neat.

In the end though Uno captured Sanada in a nasty Suplex which dropped him on his head, and then connected with his insane Sabre Tooth Splash for the Victory, pushing them both at x1 Victory each.

The final match, Sacrifice – Uno defeats Sanada for the X-Division Championship – Great Muta vs. Sanada at Slammiversary.

Bobby Roode vs. Gunner – Open Challenge – Tables Match

Roode determined to prove that he is the “Master of the Tables” as he and Bully are on a colliding course for a Tables Match at Sacrifice.

Roode put out this “Open Challenge” which was met by Gunner, after he had a little pep talk backstage by Bully Ray. Also Gunner is awesome… still needs decent music though.

The pairing of Gunner and Roode to do battle is a great match-up, in fact a feud between them both some point down the line would be rather awesome. Though I suspect TNA has something else in store.

Gunner’s F5 looking Move now has a name, called “Hanger 18” which I would guess is where he was stationed, or something significant. And it’s a cool name. Unlike some else’s “Roode Bomb”.

Either way, Gunner placed Roode on the Table setting him up for a Diving Head-butt from the Top Rope, when James Storm once again got in Gunner’s Business… yes it is that time again

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Roode then capitalised on the distraction and threw Gunner over-head from the Top-Rope onto the Table, only for Gunner to bounce straight off it, leading on a Crack down the side of the Table. Which was awesome. I love that something rather powerful only cracked the Table, unlike when Bully sat on a Table and fell through it.

 

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Roode then picked up Gunner and “Roode Bomb’d” Gunner through the Table for the Win. Which is when Bully Ray got involved and Storm and Roode ran off. Leaving Bully and Gunner vs. Storm and Roode for next week. Is Beer Money back on the scene? I sure hope so.

Abyss vs. Eric Young – Monsters Ball – World Heavyweight Championship

In what was already a fantastic, full packed show, the main event saw Abyss challenging Eric Young for a shot at the World Championship stating “you said you would defend the belt anywhere, anytime against anyone”. EY then upped the game by making it a Monsters Ball.

And it didn’t disappoint.

I’m still not crazy about Abyss’ new look, it’s the mask I don’t like. It doesn’t look sinister enough. I like the Coat, I like that the short hair sticks out and from behind he looks menacing. It just doesn’t look as good as his Original Mask design.

Either way, when he was making his way to the ring, I was thinking, at one point Abyss was TNA’s Kane / Undertaker only with an extreme edge. But all these years later, Kane and Undertaker, in my opinion, don’t have anything like Abyss does. He stayed true to that Character, that’s the beauty of doing Joseph Park, he could add a new layer to Abyss, without ever making Abyss weaker without his mask.

Abyss is legit, he’s a bad ass, he’s tall, built, strong, intimidating, and violent. He is everything Kane and Undertaker were supposed to be, only he actually is. A True TNA legend.

In a lot of ways having Abyss and Eric Young play off one another is a fantastic pairing too, and you can tell EY’s World Championship Win has lit something in him. EY is always great, but he was on a whole other level for this match, which I am sure is his World Title stature.

EY’s intense onslaught and even perfect selling (like the toss into the Chair in the corner) was great.

Abyss brought Janice into the mix, but it was EY who managed to get a hold of her, though Abyss countered that with a Chokeslam on to Thumb Tacks with a kick out at Two. Which was even better because the Fans were “INTO IT” and that’s rare for TNA. Specially Impact tapings in the US.

EY then connect with a fast paced Running Dropkick that sent Abyss backwards onto the Barbed Wire board, followed it up with his Top-Rope Elbow Drop and retained his World Championship.

You know what, I enjoyed that match enough to hold it as A Match of the Year Contender.

Impact was great this week, and has been every week since Lockdown. The ratings apparently saw a decrease in the US for this week’s show, but isn’t that always the case?

I can’t wait for Sacrifice, it feels like this was Wrestling I loved 10 years ago, leading into Backlash, also around my Birthday.

I love TNA! and Long Live – TNA!

Till then,

Dan Wilkinson

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