Author Archives: Jon P

About Jon P

Currently run www.cageamateursuk.com which is a combat sport website.

The Jobber Blogger #111 – TNA: SLAMMIVERSARY – 15/6/14

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The Jobber Blogger

Issue #111! It’s a special number, and somehow according to my facebook numbers last week’s The Jobber Blogger covering the Go-Home TNA Impact show did crazy numbers. 701 people saw the post via Total Nonstop Rewind. How the hell does that happen. I don’t see any boost in numbers though at TNR received no new likes or gained any comments.

I don’t know how to use the Internet. But what I do know, is that I’m going to try! Yes those plans I mentioned are most definitely in the works, little by little. But you’ll pleased to know I will give you more ways to dislike me… socially.

MY GOD! A phrase that is more hilarious than shocking these days, but TNA: Slammiversary! What a show. I’ve grown to accustomed to trying to praise TNA, and really searching through all I can to find the positives. But just like the TNA of old, there is one area where they are untouchable. And that is the Pay Per Views! Forget the silly storylines, forget the endless talking and crap, it’s just Wrestling, Wrestling, Wrestling from the best Locker-room in the industry. Sure that Locker-room is missing some names now than it was a few Months back, but TNA hit a home run with Slammiversary, to the extent that TNA is receiving some pretty big Positive comments from the high up talent within the Bizz.

But what was the best about Slammiversary? Well, I shall tell you!

Though on a side note, I did forget to add in my Predictions on the last Jobber Blogger so my new topic of prediction based games was completely a miss. But still, there’s always next time eh?

Slammiversary logo

 TNA: SLAMMIVERSARY – 15/6/14

I’m a little confused as to the what the official number of Fans in attendance was, it seems to be around 2,500 which isn’t that many. But they certainly made the show. And it’s the Live Events with a crazy crowd where TNA stand out. You get so used to guys working in front of a pretty dead crowd, and even though the matches might be good, but when the fans in attendance aren’t involved in the match, it makes the kick-outs and pin falls just feel flat. Even watching at home, you just don’t as invested. When the crowd is going crazy, you can see the Wrestlers eat it up, and that’s when you get that magic only Professional Wrestling can deliver, and that seeps through the Television and just makes you excited.

Slammiversary is the first time in a long time where I felt so proud to be a loyal TNA Fan. It hit home what everything is worth. I Love TNA, and I only want them to exceed, for my personal interests as well clearly, as a fan. Slammiversary embodied that, in its fullest.

Eddie Edwards vs. Davey Richards vs. Tigre Uno vs. Crazy Steve vs. Manik vs. Sanada – 6-Way Ladder Match – X-Division Championship

You could perhaps say it was a little disappointing to not have The Wolves in tag-team action on the card. Certainly a great Tag-Team match was the main thing that was missing. Having them in this match and for the most part working together acted as a good dynamic, but perhaps could have benefitted from placing other talent here instead of.

But the dynamic certainly played to the benefit of the match for having The Wolves compete, really upped the game of everyone else included.

Uno was the second guy to make his entrance, which seemed to go on for ages. I made a point to note that, but as we’ve since found out one of the Stilt Walkers from The Menagerie fell over.

There are two main things to mention from this match. One, Crazy Steve already has a big fan following, I don’t know if people know something I don’t know from his work prior to The Menagerie, or simply they just love Crazy Steve as I do. He clearly is working this gimmick brilliantly, and people are eating it up. So I fully expect we will be seeing more of him in the coming weeks, which is awesome!

Second, and most importantly:

tigre uno fn

Tigre Uno stole the show, as he has done every time I’ve seen him perform. He is brilliant, yet I still feel TNA haven’t done him any favours yet. He’s being used to all of these X-Division matches to help showcase the division, but he’s not doing much to further establish himself. I’m sure there are reasons why, given he debuted well, he’s being used a lot, but obviously next month is Destination X, and given the role the X-Division Championship holds, Uno probably doesn’t fit into the plan’s they have. However following Destination X, I’d like Uno to have a good solid Championship Run, because clearly, there’s no-one better, and TNA have some awesome, awesome talent, so that’s saying a lot.

I don’t know if it’s just because this match was the first of the night, but for my money, I think it was quite possibly the best match on the card. Not to sell any of the others short, but it was exactly what you want from TNA.

Manik performed a Sun-Set flip – Powerbomb to Davey Richards from the top of the ladder, with a second Ladder propped up from the middle to the ropes. Richards landed hard, and kudos to him for staying in that position with his head between the Ladder steps till the match ended.

Sanada took the win and retained his belt, and in a lot of ways, Sanada was the “sore thumb”. He didn’t seem quite as on the ball as everyone else, nor did Manik, which was quite surprising given his track record. I think it’s fairly safe to assume that Sanada, the X-Division Championship, Option “C” at Destination X and The Great Muta, are all playing a pretty big part in the coming weeks.

I will have to re-watch this bout at the end of the year, but I was so pleased with it and moved by it, I’ve marked it as a possible Match of the Year candidate.

Bobby Lashley vs. Samoa Joe

This was one of the matches I wasn’t sold on going into Slammiversary. And that is purely because I just don’t find the Main Event Storyline particularly interesting. If anything Slammiversary seemed to play it down, and that made the night better.

With MVP unable to compete, it gave this match a much needed boost. It’s not to say Joe and Lashley can’t compete great together, because that clearly isn’t the case. I just didn’t feel motivated enough by their recent interactions to witness a PPV – Grudge Match. I’m not that invested, I don’t believe there’s much needed motivation on either side. However giving one of them the chance to Main Event, now you’ve got my attention.

Before the match got underway, it was the only main Storyline element of the show. MVP made an appearance on crutches, backed up with Lashley and King. I’m not against having MVP on the show, they just needed to make it a little snappier for my liking.

MVP made the same announcement TNA did online days before the event, not only that but Taz and Tenay just made the same announcement seconds before MVP.

But on closing end of E3, it’s only fitting some guy in a suit slowed down the pace to talk for a while.

Lashley debuted some new entrance music, which isn’t too bad. His old one has a stupidly long intro which I always felt halted its impact (pun intended) but the actual main theme was pretty intense.

Lashley and Joe as two big guys made a great pairing, and they both worked extremely well against each other. If anything they both help other because of their separate credibility.

In the end Lashley counted Joe’s Whip into the Corner, nearly sending Joe into the ref, Joe put on the breaks but then turned around to a Lashley spear for the win.

Kudos for Lashley taking the win, and cleanly.

Magnus (w/Bram) vs. Willow (w/Abyss) 

Magnus had a bit of new look going on, well, he pretty much just wore a body warmer and called it finished. He still doesn’t pull off the look in my eyes when he’s next to Bram. Maybe Magnus should rough his hair and beard up a bit. Currently he looks a bit too much like George Michael.

Something I was very interested in seeing was the reaction to Willow. Jeff always gets good reactions, but he’s also very close to becoming TNA’s John Cena. A lot of people don’t like him, and a lot of people are vocally against him. Least you go back to Hardy vs. Aries at Bound for Glory, and people did not want him to win.

So Willow is a flip side to that. Jeff will always balance on the edge, so he will never be enough of what people dislike. Willow is the way for those people to like him, or to despise him further.

Thankfully the reaction to Willow was great, I like the character, and I love the entrance, the reaction led Jeff to kick it up a notch, which worked wonders.

Yet Willow has a big problem in my eyes. He’s a baby face. And it doesn’t work.

Willow gives Jeff the wiggle room to be against the grain, yet he’s seemingly not allowed to push it too much. Having a violent baby face probably doesn’t go so well. Yet Willow is pushed enough at us as being this violent, unpredictable force. Yet he rarely does anything. When Willow first came on the scene after Lockdown, he was. Since then, he’s been toned down. He’s been Wrestling Magnus and Bram, and getting his ass whooped. I don’t know about everyone else, but it’s like Willow isn’t even a threat, I don’t buy Magnus’ and Bram’s legitimacy because of their presence against Willow, when we’ve seen nothing of Willow’s aggression.

This led me to thinking, is it time TNA has another belt. It’s either all or nothing for the Locker-room these days, and with so many great Wrestlers stuck in the mid-card, surely there should be a top of it.

If there was a highlight from this match, it would be that Willow did a suicide dive – backwards – from the Top rope to the floor. I’ve never seen anything like that before. Thankfully both Magnus and Bram were ready and prepared for it, because a lot of the time, the guy on the outside barely catches the other when they jump forward.

willow plunge

Willow hit the Twist of Fate, but Magnus kicked out. Bram then pulled out the Turnbuckle only to have Abyss bring out Janice. Yet in the end Abyss being lured away from the Ring led to Magnus gain as he pushed Willow off the top of the ropes whilst he was attempted the Whisper in the Wind, and finished him off with a new move, Back Suplex into a forward slam, Magnus taking the win.

As has become a Tradition, the TNA Hall of Fame shall be sticking around. And this year, it actually felt rather good.

I still don’t feel they need or even should have a Hall of Fame, but clearly they want to get as many big name talents in there before the competition. I can honestly say, I didn’t know who was going to go into the Hall of Fame, and clearly they aren’t close to retiring anyway.

Team 3D is to be inducted come Bound for Glory, and it was a pretty awesome moment.

Bully and Devon had some good speeches, the crowd was electric, it felt right. The Slammiversary crowd and the inspiration and desire from Bully and Devon actually made TNA feel “legit”. That’s a thing I’ve always struggled with, will TNA’s reign actually be remembered to the likes of WCW, and right then, was a chance that it would be.

Kenny King vs. Austin Aries 

King vs. Aries is one of those matches that just get me excited. Kenny King is one of the most unusual and entertaining guys in the ring, and Aries, is just the best.

One thing that might not be the best about Slammiversary is that the Guard Rails weren’t very secure as Aries and King threw each other into them and subsequently into the crowd itself.

Aries and King is my kind of match up, both guys with awesome move sets, willing and able to do crazy things, yet grounded enough to just “Wrestle” on a level of their own.

The finish came when Aries drove King to the mat with a Top-Rope Brain Buster, putting Aries (rightfully) forward into the Main Event.

The thing with Aries is that you can’t really go wrong. Let him be himself, don’t try and push him down our throats, TNA tried that once and it backfired. That’s the best thing about Aries, he is awesome because he is legit. And people respond to that amazingly well, you know he will deliver, because he can. He’s a “Wrestler” and the fans love him because of it. Though as of yet, this hasn’t exactly been the year of Austin Aries, The Jobber Blogger’s Wrestler of the Year for two years in a row. It was rumoured he was in the “dog house” for something, who knows. But apparently that’s gone, and with Destination X right around the corner, I’m hopeful for Total Nonstop Aries.

Marshall and Ross Von Erich vs. Jesse and DJ Z

So this is a weird one. The Von Erich’s were played up to be on the show, especially an appearance by Kevin. I get it, Wrestling royalty, not to mention the hometown favourites.

But, these guys aren’t signed to TNA. They just turned up to apparently say “hey, look at us”. Which was what booking would have you believe. Clearly this got turned into  a match, but where else would it go?

Everyone left the ring with Marshall and Ross standing there waiting for an opponent, despite that they never claimed there would be a match. It was an awkward introduction, but never mind.

I know some people aren’t pleased that the Von Erich’s didn’t get a clean victory. But at the same time, if they’re not signed to TNA, why would they beat TNA’s own established talent.

Zema is still a little “odd” but at least I think he’s finally found his “style” during his time with the Bromans. The Von Erich’s started getting the upper hand when Jesse introduced a Steel chair and the match was thrown out via DQ.

This led to Kevin Von Erich getting involved and locking on the “Iron Claw” to DJ Z.

A bit random, be interesting to see if the Von Erich’s are going to stick around, or if this was just a one off type of deal.

Gail Kim vs. Angelina Love (w/Velvet Sky) – Knockouts Championship 

The silhouette entrance The Beautiful People have been using of late didn’t quite work so well at Slammiversary. Too many lights but you got the gist of it.

Although I didn’t mention it earlier, Bully Ray was showing off some new “ink” in the form of a pretty big Tattoo on his upper Left Arm. Yet Bully wasn’t the only one, as Velvet has covered most of her Left Arm in a new tattoo also. It’s still a little too new for me to like it. I like Angelina’s tattoo’s, but then she’s always had those from when I’ve been a fan, and they are somewhat understated.

Gail is clearly leaps and bounds above the competition of most female Wrestlers. She’s very fluid, and precise. And last year we were introduced a more “hard hitting” side of Gail, and that’s something which was front and centre in this match.

Both Angelina and Gail raised the bar with some hard hitting moves and bumps.

The match took a slight swerve for the gimmick approach when Velvet sprayed Gail Kim in the face with Hair Spray right in front of Referee “Stifler”. This adding to the fact that Velvet has been sweet talking him to their side. TNA has already announced the return of Taryn Tarrell, given she was Knockouts Ref for a while, maybe this will develop in her returning to Refereeing.

“Stifler” let the Hair Spray slide as Angelina connected with the Botox Injection but just got a 2-count.

Earl Hebner then came out, banned Velvet and removed “Stifler” from the match so Earl would be the Ref. Of course Earl ended up getting knocked down, and Gail attempted numerous pin attempts, “Stifler” was on the outside and didn’t count, but tried to revive Earl. Angelina then rolled up Gail and “Stifler” counted the fall.

So a little unnecessary, I enjoy a good clean Wrestling Match, but I’m fairly sure this is just part of the story currently. I’m happy Angelina retained though, that’s what I wanted most of all.

Ethan Carter the third vs. Bully Ray – Texas Deathmatch

The Texas Deathmatch is just another one of those Wrestling names for the same thing. It’s a Last Man Standing match. Which I think makes the match sound better.

Given that this was the headline match for the PPV, I’m a little surprised it didn’t go on before the Main Event.

Again, this is the main storyline developing match, but it’s not surprising as TNA are heading to New York City this week, and the fallout from this bout will no doubt be front and centre.

Bully obviously for the most part dominated EC3, big open hand chops and cheese graters to the chest to name a few.

Bully pulled the Ring apart once more to use the Wooden boards underneath. Shades of last year from Slammiversary when Bully ended Sting’s Championship career. A moment in TNA which I still think about.

Funny to think one year later and most people have forgotten the depths Bully went to as a Heel, and now they encourage his same behaviour. And like how EC3 put it, Bully is the villain, breaking into houses, threatening people’s families, businesses’ and wanting to hurt a woman.

Spud got involved bringing a Kendo stick, but Bully obviously made quick of Spud. In the end, Dixie came out, and was trying to get away from Bully, she ran into EC3 both falling to the floor with Dixie being “knocked out”. Bully put Dixie on the tables outside of the ring but EC3 hit Bully in the back with a Kendo stick, Spud pulled Dixie out of the way as Bully fell through the Tables and didn’t make the 10 count, letting EC3 pick up the win.

James Storm vs. Mr. Anderson 

I’m fairly sure this match went on before the Main Event due to the involvement of the Dallas Cowboys.

They ran a Video Package for this match, which really wasn’t all that worthwhile.

Storm and Anderson having beef with each other because Storm accidently kicked him is a little silly. It works fine, but I need a video package for it. Storm and Anderson are the kind of hot headed guys that want to fight, that works for me.

There is one thing that stood out above anything else, and that is how awesome James Storm is as a heel. The fact he’s not in the Main Event scene is terrible in my eyes. That’s all I want. Storm just being a bad freakin’ villain. Not backing down, just bringing the fight. And it works.

The match was fairly short, but it did include an old school Green Bay Plunge from the second rope by Mr. Anderson, which is still an awesome move.

Storm spent most of the match distracted by the Dallas Cowboys, which was a shame.

Storm got out his Beer Bottle but some of the Dallas Cowboys jumped the Guard Rail, distracting Storm and ending with Anderson catching him with a Mic Check for the win.

Eric Young vs. Bobby Lashley vs. Austin Aries – 3-way Steel Cage Match – World Heavyweight Championship

On a side note, I just typed Bobby Lashley’s name like “Bobbly” – I chuckled a little.

nobbly bobbly

It is a shame that whatever plan TNA had in place for MVP didn’t quite come to pass. Though I do believe it will go on just a nicely regardless, if not, save MVP vs. EY for a later date.

That being said, despite the build up time for the main event, it delivered.

Just about half way through was when things kicked into another gear, Aries with a hurricanrana to Lashley from the Top Rope, with EY dropping an elbow off the top of the cage. Aries then grabbed EY for a Brain Buster for only a 2 count.

Lashley was impressive through-out the match, and successfully speared his way out of the Cage Door, no doubt it could have been a tricky thing to perform correctly.

This left EY and Aries to battle it out, Aries getting the upper hand till he attempted the Brain Buster only to have EY kick off from against the Cage and land – Pile Driving Aries for the win.

A good match, a great PPV.

Not sure what’s next for EY or even TNA for that matter, but I believe it’s New York on Thursday, and it’s going to be special.

TNA are hosting a Poll for fans to Vote on which TNA ring they want, the Four Sided or the Six Sided, Voting ends on Thursday – Midnight, the results up on Friday. Pretty sure it will be the Six Sided.

TNA have also announced that Matt Hardy is making a return to the Company, don’t know if this is just a one off type of deal or what.

Slammiversary was a great success, with the New York tapings in place and some big ideas, quite honestly it seems the Ball is definitely in TNA’s court and they seem to be playing it with everything they’ve got.

Till then!

Dan Wilkinson

www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

www.thesteelchair.com

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Monday Night Raw #1099: June 16, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer

You know what I don’t understand about all this future endeavor sh!t? Why the f**k are fans concerned about 3MB? THEY WERE WACK – GET OVER IT! I admit – I was kinda heartbroken when JTG and Teddy Long were let go… JTG was getting paid for sittin on his @$$! Let’s be real, if you were getting paid thousands for sittin on yo’ @$$, YOU WOULD LOVE IT! SO SHUDDUP!

GRANT-BODY P!!!

Stay tuned Smack Talk Centre… The Infamous Informer (that’s me, IWC’s favourite nemesis) and  Shadfather (Negrodamus, take heed in his words) host the STC Future Endeavor list! We have compiled a Top 10 superstars that the STC would give a P45/Pink slip to, along with that one diva (WWE fired Aksana), so who does the STC choose?

It all happens this Saturday night 1am UK 8pm EST on BDSIR NETWORK…

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER!

Enough of all that, time for RAW! #1099!! HOL’ DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZOk why the f**k are everybody out here? What is this ‘critical announcement?’ How many shows have started with Triple TEEF and Stephanie these days? I mean I don’t mind Stephanie…. especially if she started the show with her lovely legs and backside to the camera!

Oh SNAP – look at Stephanie’s top! With the one strap on her arm!!!! She needs some ‘young’ meat… Triple TEEF ain’t that right mayyynnnn!

Wait a minute – everybody in a battle royal? Does that include the divas??? Oh dear – The Shield and Cena are not allowed? TRIPLE TEEF!!!!!!!

HA! Because I’m tight-fisted and tried to watch RAW on a stream while entertaining you guys – the stream breaks down on me. I manage to sort it and I hear something about John Cena fighting my hero Kane in a stretcher match???? Cena you’re my dude but Kane is my hero! KILL CENA!!! KILLLLLLLL HIM!!!!

Good luck to the athletes at the Special Olympics in New Jersey!!! And the Infamous Informer continues to support his team in the World Cup! Nah not England – they still rely on one man to carry them….enough of that sh!t – Seth Rollins Vs Dolph Ziggler! GET HIM SETH! And oh yeah – CHANGE YOUR MUSIC – it ain’t saying nuthin!

I do like that Rollins maintains his swat gear as his attire… VERY GOOD!

Big ups to STC’s Anthony Cardenas who says a ladder match between Ziggler and Rollins would be crazy and I agree!

Was that a Lionsault attempt by Seth Rollins???? WHOA! (Don’t go saying he’s the next Jericho…) I’d slap you upside the head like my name is Batman and you Robin!

I said that Dean Ambrose wants to f**k you up Rollins! I gotta big up Triple TEEF for this one… comes up on titantron and tells Ambrose – ‘I’M AFRAID I GOT SOME BAD NEWS!!!’ In his best English accent! Out comes Wade Barrett – WROOOOOOY! Another great fight (I can’t say wrestling match) about to pop off!

So let me get this right so I can understand this: Ambrose is now fighting in his vest and jeans while Rollins would still fight in his swat gear? Interesting. I’m glad they not fighting in standard wrestling attire….

Meanwhile, INFAMOUS TWITTER AMUSEMENT:

So @KevinHart4real is coming to host #Raw #WWECleveland…. I told him to watch out for @RusevBUL"</p

KEVIN HART

THE GRANT SAYS: Something tells me Kevin Hart will stand up to the racist Rusev!!! And may try to chat up Lana too!

OH SNAP!!! Is Roman Reigns spiking Triple and Steph McTeef’s drinks???? Oh my god NO!!! By the way Reigns – Vickie Guerrero is NOT beautiful!!!!

All I know is, it’s personal between Ambrose and Rollins now! Ambrose never cared about his match with Barrett – he just wanted to fight! Rollins comes out to teef, and fight brukk out in the crowd! Yo Triple – don’t give these two a standard match at Money Inna Bank…. this is a straight up street fight!

HOLY F**K – my internet is down…. Now is a good time to get my ice cream! Shall I play some PS3 while I’m waiting? I know it’s not the bill… ain’t that a b!tch…

Ok we back! I was gonna play Tekken Tag Tournament 2, and next thing I know Sheamus & Bray Wyatt are trying to destroy each other….

Yo check it – Bray is in the Munny Inna Bank match for the WWE title, The Usos defend their titles against Rowan & Harper, can you imagine if The Wyatt Family cleans up? It would be even better than what The Shield did!!!

HEY – TEEEF! Sheamus was gonna finish Wyatt with his Brogue Kick and Wyatt’s BDSIR LAYLA GRANTbredrin tried to hold him back, and BIG FIGHT BRUKK OUT between Sheamus and the Usos against the Wyatt man dem!!! Ladders involved! The Usos – running up the ladder and flying into the Wyatt man dem! Sheamus with the ladder – throws it over the ring and onto their head – BLAOW!!!! RAW IS DANGEROUS RUDE BOY!

Oh seen!!! The stretcher match between Cena & Kane is to qualify for the Munny Inna Bank!

What’s wrong Stephanie? You got the runs girl???? The coffee too sweet??? MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Don’t forget to wipe your @$$!

GRANT BODY-P!!!

WHOA!!! Paul Heyman says that Cesaro is gonna become the World Wrestling Federation champion at Munny Inna Bank???? Not a prediction, but a spoiler????!!!!! DROP THE BOMB ON EM!

OHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! It’s that f**kable Lana!!!! Why doesn’t the crowd chant ‘suck my d!ck’????!! even the ladies?!!!!

GRANT BODY-P!!!

Oh no! Lana changed up Mount Rushmore!!!! 4 Russian ambassadors? She Can’t Do That!!!

Ok Heath Slater, you lost your buddies, you still gonna get brukk up by Rusev!!! CRUSH!!!

OH MY DAYS!! It wasn’t the runs….. Roman Reigns put some sh!t in the coffee that made Steph throw up crazy all over the WWE and all over Vickie Guerrero!!! NOW THAT IS JUSTICE!!!!!

Wait! It gets better!!! Triple did say that Vickie is in charge while he takes Stephanie home… which left Roman to manipulate Vickie into letting him into the battle royal! Winner goes into Munny Inna Bank!!! OH MY GOD NO! Roman is gonna win! What’s Triple gonna do now???? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! I LOVE IT!!!

So w’happen? Kevin Hart is gonna be on commentary??? UH-OH!!!! He could say anything on that mic!!!!

F**K me – Layla…. those thighs…. OH SNAP – she poured milk all over Summer Rae and rubbed her face in kitty litter last week on Main Event? YES BABY!!!! Now Summer looks like a porn star after 200 men cum all over her stank @$$!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Kevin Hart looks confused with the attire of Fandango and Adam Rose! Well he is Thinking Like A Man!

NO! Kevin Hart has become a rosebud!!! Yo Adam Rose – you may jump into your crowd but you can’t do it like Method Man!!!

Method Man dive

Roman Reigns keeps the Shield music…. interesting! I thought the battle royal was the main event? Never mind!

Interesting – Rusev in the match…. who is gonna eliminate him??? I’m gonna Keep Watch like the Wu-Tang…

No point booing over the fact that Ziggler was eliminated… I gave up on him since the book of Genesis!

BACKFOOT! Roman Reigns and Rusev the last two!!!!!

Superman punch to the headtop of Rusev – BLAOW!!!! Roman Reigns is in the Munny Inna Bank ladder match!!! Triple TEEF don’t check your twitter! Attend to your wife!!!

Happy Birthday warrior

SALUTE!!!!!

Forget about Cena’s promo…. that Renée Young….

There’s something bout this girl man, from around my way
Ever try to hold back your feelings, but it just wouldn’t stay
But when I finally found the words to say
I wanted to run away, simply run away
You can try to run and hide, it won’t make a difference
You can lie to yourself, or try to reason
Sure it hurts when it comes to your attention
That you’re in love with the girl…

I must do a Lana tribute video… then following that, a Renée Young video… but make no mistake about it… The Infamous Informer is in love….with LAYLA.

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Big ups to Cameron and Naomi…they outlasted Broadus Clay! I said that the Funkadactyls would break out and become the true stars! They even running with Broadus music!

Interesting…Naomi not feeling Cameron’s attitude and fighting style…. it will be a sad day if these two break up….

Ok so Cody Rhodes has found this ‘partner’ for Goldust? He’s the don? Who is he? Booker-T? Razor Ramon? Rowdy Roddy Piper? How about Ahmed Johnson??????

GRANT BODY – P!!!

WTF!!! Stardust is the new tag team partner for Goldust???? We know it’s you Cody Rhodes but hey! Let’s not be Smarks and enjoy this sh!t!!!

Bumbaclart! They win!!! And Stardust got a new move set on top!!! I like this!!!

Damn I gotta do some wrestling research… 10 years ago there was a stretcher match on Raw, and it involved my hero Kane but I can’t remember who the opponent was… alternatively you guys could tell me by answering on a postcard or tweeting me @MZATheInfamous!

I took a quick trip to google… I know who it was… On this day, I see clearly….

Question – when WWE2K15 drops later this year, will the game developers chant ‘CM Punk’ on random matches? Could CM Punk be a secret character???? ANSWERS ON A POSTCARD PLEASE!!!!

Oh HELL 2 DA NAW!!! Cena hit the FU to my hero Kane through the announce table – BLAOW!!!! DAMNIT!!! Come on Kane… Get up Kane…GET HIM KANE!!!

What???? SETH ROLLINS & RANDALL – TEEF!!!! They gonna brukk up Cena!!! Ambrose runs through to continue the beef with Rollins! But Kane – Chokeslam to Ambrose – BLAOW!!!! Cena recovers, carries the steel steps, throws it at Kane – BLAOW!!! YO! THIS SH!T IS CRAZY!!!

GRANT BODY – P!

#VOCAREADREGNUM!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#GWARNYUHBED

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.

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The Jobber Blogger #110 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 12/6/14

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The Jobber Blogger

To think, 10 issues ago was issue 100. There’s some math to kick you in the knee caps! Or shins, if you happen to be a strange alien being at the mercy of one Captain Kirk’s instinctive kick to the groin… accidentally.

Well, that could potential be the most inappropriate way to start this, but hey, what could be better?

Yes TNA heads toward Slammiversary, live tonight actually in the US. But the question is, does their “go home” show deliver. I may have come across a little “negative” last week, and while this week’s show didn’t annoy me as much, I was very much so looking forward for it to end.

When did that happen? 1 hour and a half of Wrestling and I’m bored. The main event should be the thing you want more than anything, but yet, it was just the same old tired boring routine. On the plus side, the same old tired boring routine has had a little bit of a shake up! And yes, that’s good!

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TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 12/6/14

Sadly, Impact did not kick off with a match, but a match wasn’t actually far behind. The TNA World Champion – Eric Young made his way to the ring (in Wrestling attire… a pretty good give away) and called out MVP.

A whole load of un-necessary garbage later the theme for the show was set. EY was going to war against MVP, Lashley and King, and should be able to win, he gets to pick the stipulation and have his “fair fight”.

Eric Young vs. Bobby Lashley

Believe it or not, but Lashley was the only one between he, MVP and Kenny King to be dressed to compete, it’s like they pre-planned this match?

Either way, this took me a little by surprise. Which is the best way to describe TNA’s main theme this week. See when it was set that EY needed to defeat MVP, Lashley and King, I therefore assumed it would be a handicap match. King again making orders (somehow) claimed EY couldn’t even defeat two of them, and so the challenge was set. Again, I expected this to be 2 on 1. But no, it was a gauntlet… with gaps. EY had to compete in three matches to get his fair fight, all of them spaced out throughout the show, which as it happens… seems fair. Too fair really.

It gets further confusing when Lashley makes quick work of EY, beats him down, injures his back, catches EY mid air and Powerslam’s him to the mat and picks up the win.

My instant reaction was, Awesome! EY got his ass kicked by big bad Bobby Lashley and now EY can’t name his stipulation. Nope.

Just because he lost, doesn’t mean he still can’t win. A stupid idea. Surely if MVP was that bent on having the advantage, it would be a handicap match. Should it not be that, giving a slight edge to EY, it should be that EY wasn’t able to actually lose. He lost, straight away. That should have been the end of it, and quite frankly something I wasn’t expecting. I was expecting an entire show where EY “defies the odds’!” phony injury and all. Still.

Lashley wasn’t done and Samoa Joe came to his aid, thus pitting Joe vs. Lashley at Slammiversary in a mid-card match no-one gives two craps about seeing.

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Now That’s Booking!

Magnus and Bram made their way to the ring. Bram looking pretty intense and awesome and Magnus looking like he has a hard time selling the idea of him being intense and awesome. He looked like a presentable version of Bram. I hope Magnus can pull off the gimmick, but right away he’s the less impressive guy in the ring, Magnus works being Magnus, Bram is a natural at playing this crazy intense violent dude. So Bram debuts as this “crazy intense violent dude” and I believe. TNA then tell me “Magnus is just as intense, crazy and violent” and I don’t believe it. Put them side by side, one is trying, one works. So the former World Heavyweight Champion – veteran – Magnus, now looks less legit than the new guy…..

good booking

Good Booking!

Magnus was given the same old crap speech to explain himself. I really don’t think he needed to, nobody really cares enough, and he’s playing a heel, it’s not like he’s changed, he just ditched looking smart for Bram’s clothes.

Magnus blabbed on about “they” changed him to who he was. Yet this entire “change” apparently only covers the few Months where he was Champion, not the how many years he was the exact same guy beforehand, only without a Championship and catchphrase.

Willow wobbled his way to the entrance ramp, and actually did an alright promo. Jeff sucks trying to be himself, he is charismatic in everything, but dialogue. So Jeff being even more awkward as Willow is just… awkward. Unless they edit it with snazzy effects and reverb, then it’s kind of cool. Jeff jumped between his two personalities, and I actually expected him to ditch the mask and return to being “Jeff Hardy” again, but instead he didn’t. He did however talk about “we”, which was quite good, I’d rather have Willow come out with a blow up doll dressed like Jeff to compete. Instead, Abyss turned up. Abyss obviously back with issues against Magnus, so now it starts to make a bit more sense.

He still looks sort of stupid though, and not at all intimidating like he used to.

Robbie E (w/ Jesse, DJ Z) vs. Knux (w/ The Menagerie)

The Menagerie is this weird blend of good ideas and poor execution, which is always TNA’s staple of work. For instance, the idea of The Menagerie is quite good. The Freak sucks. Crazy Steve is awesome, yet rather than being more awesome, he’s sort of more “comical” and that makes him child friendly in my eyes, rather than being creepy and dark. His look is creepy and dark, how he moves is creepy and dark, the way he snaps is neck around is awesome creepy and dark. But then he’s being stupid, and with the rest of them (namely The Freak who is also known as Walking Stupid) undermines Crazy Steve’s credibility and potential, I feel, at least.

I like having the music playing and crazy lights, but then it always puts the advantage to Knux, they used to do the same thing with the Bromans, so it would be better if it went back and forth a little.

The match was alright, but it has far too many moving parts and gimmicks on both sides for there to be anything to dig your teeth into and get to know anyone as “wrestlers” or characters.

Knux didn’t have too many problems in picking up the win, with multiple distractions on both sides. Crazy Steve then tied his balloons to the back of Robbie E’s trunks, so he freaked out and ran around stupidly. Kind of funny, I get the whole having “characters for everyone” but The Bromans, especially Robbie are very credible in the ring, it would be nice to see Robbie given the chance to be a bit more serious at times. Though Tigre Uno has recently said he’d like to Wrestle Crazy Steve, and implied that he’s very good in the ring, so I’m anxious to see him actually Wrestle.

Ethan Carter the third and Spud brought out “Brooke”. Or Miss Tessmacher, or Brooke Tessmacher, correctly called Brooke Adams. Can’t they just call her that now?

It was awesome to see Brooke back, she’s one of my favourites, aside from the whole “sexualised gyrating move set she does”.

Despite the fact Brooke turned heel very quickly, ditched the fans, got a new persona… got written off of tv for months and months, she’s now back and a face. But whatever, Wrestling, get it.

EC3 was hoping to learn some dark secrets about Bully Ray, but the whole segment got vastly better when Spud took charge.

Spud who put the spot light on Brooke and removed an envelope with evidence that Brooke’s child is indeed Bully’s. Obviously, entirely incorrect information, but highly entertaining. Including everyone’s favourite – the Titan Tron pictures. With a side by side of Bully and some random Baby.

More Spud.

Bully came out to Brooke’s aid, with a horrible, horrible idea of Bully apologising to Brooke and telling her how awesome she is, including a Hug. We don’t need to see that. We all know Bully is married outside of Wrestling, the whole Aces and Eights thing was a good idea, he ditched Brooke when he lost the belt, he’s a bad guy. Now he’s a softy good guy, it’s almost difficult to watch.

EC3 then challenged Bully to a Tables match, which was then one upped by Bully to a Texas Death-match.

Okay, theory time.

Bully Ray is on Dixie Carter’s side. They needed a way to eliminate MVP and the control he has, the best way to do that is give him the power, with Dixie being entirely sure MVP was just as corrupt. And he was. Bully was thrown in the mix to “fool” people, just like The Aces and Eights. Only this time, perhaps more clever?

So my guess is in the end Bully won’t put Dixie through a table, because they are aligned, and always have been. Perhaps even with Bully getting back the World Championship. As far as EC3 and Spud are concerned, Dixie clearly has no issues with throwing them to the hands of Bully just to get her company back and prove a point. That’s my theory. Bully is being “too good”.

suspicious bully

Eric Young vs. Kenny King

This was the match of the night, King is a fantastic talent, and I love the current position he is in. Against EY, they both put on a great match, and The Royal Flush – King’s special move, is awesome!

Though a little annoying he just then spent time showing off rather than pinning EY, a clear sign we know how the match is going to play out.

EY then hit the Pile-Driver on King and I cringed, again. You could see King move his head up a little too early, but I don’t blame him one second. The whole move is just bad. I don’t know why they are continuing it. I guess if all parties are happy to do it, fair enough. But it’s almost like “the pile driver will set us apart from the competition”. There’s a pretty damn good reason why they don’t use that move, and I wish TNA would be the same.

Brittany vs. Madison Rayne vs. Gail Kim – #1 Contendership – Knockouts Title

It’s a little annoying that these number one contender matches need to take place, and usually do just before a PPV. The Knockouts have some interesting stories going on currently, can’t they work them into a Title match without having the randomly win an opportunity.

Brittany spent the first part of match copying Madison, and also doing her best to help her in a 2 on 1 type of situation.

Angelina and Velvet crashed the match to join commentary which led to a great little line from Tenay “right in the midst of this three way…… excuse me”.

Madison obviously got more annoyed with Brittany and in the end hit her. Angelina and Velvet made their way to the ring to try and help Brittany win but instead assisted Gail Kim who dropped Brittany with “eat defeat” and is now the Number One Contender.

I wouldn’t be surprised if Brittany joins The Beautiful People, only for them to abuse her and beat up or something. Also remember Taryn Terrell is expected back, would be pretty neat if she were to join up with The Beautiful People too. Not to mention the Von Erich’s are coming to Slammiversary, so perhaps a possible reunion with Lacey isn’t out of the question either.

MVP vs. Eric Young

Yes the main event is here, and it’s the very same main event they were planning for Slammiversary. And it was boring.

Lashley and King beat down EY before he got in the ring, MVP power-bombed EY into the Corner Turnbuckle which looked very, very dangerous how he landed.

In the end MVP just got a Chair and beat up EY getting himself disqualified and thus giving EY a victory so he can pick the stipulation. MVP’s plan of course was just to beat down on EY, which makes sense I suppose.

EY chooses a cage match. And thankfully MVP injured himself recently on a house show and cannot compete tonight, so the match has since been changed, which actually makes the card much more exciting.

So rather than having EY vs. MVP in a Cage for the World Championship, EY will instead face the Winner’s of the Bobby Lashley vs. Samoa Joe and Kenny King vs. Austin Aries matches in a Triple-Threat Cage Match for the Main Event. So well done, the main event is now a little more exciting, and two randomly booked mid card matches (aside from King and Aries to be fair, should be awesome) are now much more interesting.

Speaking of Slammiversary!

Willow (/Abyss) vs. Magnus (w/Bram)

Angelina Love vs. Gail Kim – Knockouts Championship

Bully Ray vs. EC3 – Texas Death Match

Bobby Lashley vs. Samoa Joe – Number One Contender – Main Event

Kenny King vs. Austin Aries – Number One Contender – Main Event

James Storm vs. Mr. Anderson

EY – vs. winners – Triple Threat – Steel Cage- World Heavyweight Championship

Plus the Von Erich’s, plus the TNA Hall of Fame inductee 2014.

Should be a good night, I aim to have my Write up for Wednesday!

Till then!

Dan Wilkinson

www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

www.thesteelchair.com

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The Jobber Blogger #109 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 5/6/14

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The Jobber Blogger

Why is it there is always so much stuff to do. Least it feels that way. Ah my old friend, ye’ Jobber Blogger. You are always such fun. I remember writing little things about “possible plans going forward”. Well, those plans are still in development, but that’s about as much as I have to announce right now. I feel like a Spoke’s person from E3. Which is, as some of you may know, right now! But alas, my gaming needs and addictions (though rarely.. play them?) will take a bit of back seat for me to catch up with the good old Wrestling.. mess.

I don’t even know where TNA is going, the ratings are going down, that’s one thing for sure. But then no Live TV hurts a show trying to be live TV. It doesn’t feel exciting, it doesn’t feel relevant, we all know this happened weeks ago. The performers are probably sick to death of doing multiple week’s worth of TV in one taping. The audience get tired of watching it (believe me). And yes, people then get sick to watch it on TV, especially if you were actually in attendance. Slammiversary isn’t far away and neither is the New York shows, which hopefully will add a lovely bit of mixture to the pot. Yet despite the “popular demand” TNA would have you believe, the tickets apparently aren’t flying out of the Booking window. One of their recent out-door shows looks like a naff country fair where hardly anyone is interested in anything and only attend because it’s “local”.

TNA empty

MVP apparently is injured, Tommy Dreamer might be pissed off with Dixie pulling Bully from his House of Hardcore event, it’s a bad sign when TNA need to use “NEED TO USE!!” Tommy Dreamer’s House of Hardcore fans and audience to pad out on of TNA’s (One Night Only) PPV’s. Who even watches them?

I’ve never felt any desire to watch a One Night Only TNA PPV. I don’t want to. Why are you wasting your money on them? They’re clearly not working.

Hell, Eric Young clearly isn’t drawing in the big crowds and attention TNA had hoped. But then EY feels less like EY and more like “new cooperate EY” without anyone trying to change him on air. I really don’t know where things are going to go. The Wolves are good… but I’m not like “bothered” or must watch tendencies. The Menagerie, I’m starting to enjoy seeing them less. EC3 never really “ticked the box” for me. James Storm is still good, Roode, Aries, EY, but hey, TNA is different, and it’s changing. I’m still on board to watch…. but for how long?

Impact Wrestling Logo

 TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 5/6/14

Samoa Joe kicked off Impact, with MVP and co looking for Joe backstage, it was Joe who went straight to the ring playing “Hard to miss”. That’s not even a weight joke.

Joe calls out MVP and co and challenges them all to a fight. And guess what, I don’t care. I don’t want to see them fight, I don’t even want to see Joe that much. Everyone is being built, and no-one is winning in the area to define themselves. Eric Young vs. MVP, that vision has gone. I’m lost in this mess of EY, MVP, Lashley, King, Aries, Bully, Joe. Who am I supposed to think is the clear threat? Who is on who’s side… why do I care? Bully is being pushed the most, Aries has the most compelling argument, Joe, I find Joe boring, MVP, meh. Not bothered anymore.

I don’t care who is the Champion, they’ve never shown me any reasons to believe that actually being the Champion is worth being the Champion. Where is this “power!” that comes with the belt. What power does EY have? It’s a big old mess, and I just struggle to be bothered. I really do.

Aries got involved trying to “even the playing field” between Joe, MVP, Lashley and King. This led MVP to make a match between Aries and Joe – loser gets fired. Only rather than making it that simple, it was described as “Joe, you don’t actually have a full-time contract yet, sort of, given that I didn’t bring you back, due to you not being satisfied with your opportunities. And Aries, I don’t like you, and you had to sit at home anyway.” blah blah blah, whatever.

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 Bram vs. Willow

More things I don’t care about. Angry Bram screaming like an Angry British dude and Jeff Hardy dressed weirdly screaming like a woman.

If there is a positive, it’s that Bram is actually presented, and feels like a bigger threat than he is. He’s not all that experienced, yet he does feel like a big time player, given that Willow (Hardy) should easily be able to defeat him.

I quite like Bram’s intensity, and I enjoy it lately when Willow rises that too. But the interesting dynamic of involving Willow and his transformation from Jeff Hardy, only really applies to the World Title, Dixie Carter, EC3, Spud, and yes, Magnus. But this sort of “he’s violent” so I shall fight him mentality seems to make Willow more of a goof, to be beaten up so much?

Goofy Willow

Bram gets out his friend, Mr. Ply bar who coincidently is the four legged best friend of Magnus’ old chum – Mr. Turnbuckle

Mr Turnbuckle mr ply-bar

Magnus makes his way to the ring, ready to stop Bram – again, for no reason. And instead decides this time, he’s going to be “his old self” again…. also for no reason.

Magnus beats down on Willow, would have been better if they used the old Aces and Eights Hammer, that looked violent and deadly. This.. not so much.

I don’t get this change in Magnus, I don’t understand why it’s needed, or where it’s going. And again… I don’t care either.

Eddie Edwards vs. Davey Richards

Yes, if you’re not a fan of The Wolves by now, then seeing them in Flip Flops would probably put you off them for good….

Wolves Flip Flops

Eddie and Davey broke into MVP’s office then decided to call him names, then complained because he put them in this match against each other. Here’s a tip… don’t be a git. What would you expect, am I supposed to feel bad these two were made to fight each other because the put their flip flopped feet on MVP’s table and called him names for doing his own business. Where the hell is the good line and bad line in Wrestling, surely being so strict on either side is just as bad.

Davey then called MVP a sheep in Wolfs clothing…. so there goes the rest of the fan base…

MVP - Sheep in Wolf clothing

Eddie and Davey then spent the match rolling around on the floor with each other in the best display of two grown men performing continuous forward rolls.

Kenny King came out to moderate the match and tried his best to encourage them to “fight”. In the end Eddie gained a quick pin on Davey (I believe) and they then both beat up King.

The Bromans trying to avoid The Menagerie went to the ring to talk about The Menagerie. So The Menagerie came out to attack The Bromans. Robbie E scared of clowns, DJ Z vs. Crazy Steve in a Horn Battle. Freak sucks. Yup… good bye credibility.

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Okay, I am at least pleased to know that TNA had a plan for Samuel Shaw after getting him committed. I like that involved Gunner. But now Shaw has an imaginary friend, apparently, named Dave. Whom only he can see. So either Dave is a ghost and we’re all going to enjoy some Wrestling television we’ll regret watching for years to come. Or this will just “pass” as him being crazy.

Least some stink clouds have a nice rectum it came from, and in this case it’s Gunner looking at Shaw’s drawings. Pretty sure if your being committed to a padded cell and straight jacket, they wouldn’t give you things to stab with. But whatever.

The last of the pictures Shaw had drawn however, was one of Gunner. I shall rise above the bottom of the barrel gay jokes and decide this might be nice. Gunner asked Shaw if he would finish the picture for him.

And a Very First, for The Jobber Blogger, I have an Exclusive Scoop!

Yes, I managed to ask the kind folks over at TNA for the exclusive picture debut of Samuel Shaw’s – Gunner!

GUNNER PIC

I’m not going to lie… I expected better…. even of myself.   … Also that was a lie, but to be honest, that’s pretty good!

Austin Aries vs. Samoa Joe – Contract vs. Contract

Yup, the second best match from 2012 was to be contested. What, did it live up to the hype? Of course not, it’s TNA in 2014, they barely do matches anymore. It’s just “stuff” to propel further “stuff” in a direction heading to an area filled with “stuff”. All to decide once and for all “whatever”.

MVP had put Brian Hebner in a position where he must “do the right thing” and call the match down the middle and have a winner and a loser. Bully Ray and EY confronted Hebner about doing the right thing. And guess what, here comes a pet peeve.

“I Have a Family to Feed!”

Shut the absolute hell up!

I don’t think I can take this clichéd crap-ola anymore. They were once like Brothers, I need to put food on my table.

Really? You’re not exactly on minimum wage are you. You want me to feel sorry for you and to sympathise with your poor, poor income. Shut up! It winds me up something fierce!

I couldn’t give two craps about your family, on a personal level sure, I get it. On a Wrestling show, to sell a story line, I don’t want to hear about it.

I’d rather Hebner was fired. It pisses me off!

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Sting2

So yeah Bully punched Hebner in the face throwing out the match. MVP got angry, Bully and co challenged MVP, Lashley, King and EC3 to an 8-man Tag – First Blood match. Which King accepted and then apparently that was a secure decision. MVP didn’t have to do it, so I don’t buy for a second he was annoyed. FACTS PEOPLE!

Anderson beer 003

You might have seen these through-out the Issue by now, the best part of this week’s show was indeed Mr. Anderson being himself, dressed up as James Storm taking the piss, and being hilarious doing it. I enjoy the confrontation between he and Storm best, I love Storm as a heel. Storm just came out, beat him up, and that’s all it needed.

Madison Rayne vs. Angelina Love (w/Velvet Sky) – Knockouts Championship

I don’t actually remember the last time I watched a “Wrestling” match on Impact.

This is all story driven crap as well. I like Madison, I love Angelina. But this was just as irritating as everything else on the show.

Earlier in the night Madison told Brittany to “DO NOTHING!” tonight to even try and help Madison. LEAVE ME ALONE, DON’T COME TO THE RING, DO NOTHING!

So Brittany comes to the ring, obviously. Sure she didn’t cost Madison the match, Madison lost because Velvet sprayed her in the face with Hair Spray, Angelina took advantage and retained her Championship.

Then afterward, Madison goes to Brittany  “what was that? Why didn’t you help me!?” REALLY!!!

Is this the best you can think of, is this the best dialogue. “Because you told me so”. Am I supposed to believe Madison is that dumb? Really?

Madison vs Brittany

 Ethan Carter the third, MVP, Bobby Lashley, Kenny King vs. Bully Ray, Eric Young, Samoa Joe and Austin Aries – 8-Man Tag – First Blood Match

 You know what, I’m just getting more annoyed the more I remember this show and what TNA is today. The match sucked.

Bully punched EC3 in the head with his chain, the match was over before we saw blood… then there was blood…. don’t care, bored of this.

The only redeeming quality was MVP, Lashley and King looking like good for nothing thugs after the match when they singled out EC3, held him down in the back and beat the crap out of him. I liked that.

Dixie running in, yelling for them to stop, and it finally putting an interesting dynamic between her and MVP. Let alone makes MVP actually feel like a threat. So that, could be interesting.

Till then, I pray for Global Force Wrestling to be awesome, and look forward to that ROH PPV with Kaz and Daniels… which I only just remembered was happening… so yeah pretty much just GFW.

Till then,

Dan Wilkinson

www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

www.thesteelchair.com

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 www.cageamateursuk.com

Monday Night Raw #1098: June 9, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer

 

Ooooooooh that TRIPLE TEEEEEEEEF!!!! WTF did that muthaf***a say to Seth Rollins to make him turn evil? It’s one of those moments, at least to me, I’m not mad at Seth, but more Triple! Oh he got that shovel out alright! I wanna take it and whack it in his head! Ok so what’s gonna happen this week?  By the way Triple, that’s my line muthaf***a, ‘Whoever Loses, I WIN!’ NOT YOU!!!!

IS THIS THE END OF THE SHIELD? WILL THE SHIELD BRING IN ANOTHER RECRUIT? WILL SETH CONTINUE TO TIMBERLAND BOOT STOMP MUTHAF***AZ? RAW #1098! HOL’DAT BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZUh-Oh!!!! Blockbuster announcement??? Why do Triple & Stephanie look so happy???? Oh no I bet it’s something to do with Danny Bryan being stripped of the title??? Oh my god no!!!

OH SNAP!!! The doc said it all! Game over!!!! Damn Danny… I suppose we gotta make it burn like the CM Punk fans last week…nothing we can do folks, Danny Bryan – no longer Undisputed WWE World Heavyweight Champion… Brie Bella sacrificed herself, for nothing….

Watch out for the Lama (Triple TEEF) tryna plot your tragedy…

Whoa! Sheamus Vs Bad News Barrett in a qualifying match for the Money Inna Bank? THE GRANT SAYS two things: One, we are in for another great brawling contest, and two, one of them won’t need to defend their own titles respectively at the PPV!

Plus, Randall Orton doesn’t have to qualify – he’s automatically added in the match???? TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!!

What’s wrong STC UK???? Wade Barrett not qualifying??? Ha – SHUDDUP!!! As entertaining and talented as Barrett is, remember one thing – he helped bury the Undertaker alive. THAT is UNFORGIVABLE. It was none of his dyam business!

Ok Bray Wyatt you are reborn…. whoopie doo! All Cena did was put you in a box and you couldn’t get out of it for 10… that box wasn’t even a casket! Reborn my stinking foot!

OK GUYS PAY ATTENTION! Lana is here with her fine @$$!

How is she gonna disrespect Barack Obama??? Seriously Lana which black guy (or should I say n!**@) done you bad???? I’m sure Mike Knoxxx will go out, find him and skin him alive!

HA! HA! Rusev’s opponent: Wack Ryder! Yes he got TV time, and he’s gonna lose, YEAAAAH!!! RUSEV – CRUSH!!!!!!

YEAAAH! TAKE THAT WACK RYDER! AND SHUDDUP!!! AND DISPLAY DE RUSSIAN FLAG!

Rybaxel to go against Goldust again? And R-Truth is his partner this week? Why doesn’t Goldust just find Booker-T? I hated that team back then only because I felt that Booker-T was a true singles competitor – 5 times WCW champion rude boy, look at the main event scene back then and I didn’t even watch WCW!

Rybaxel win again! That’s 3 times now!!!! WHOA!!!! They keep going like this they could go for the tag team titles!

How dare that biatch Summer Rae pour milk all over my Layla….. Look here Summer rae – just because you can’t get d!ck because your facial features are f**ed up… what a waste, sexy legs and nothing to show for it… I’d still put it in tough, just pull her hair – straight backshot business!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

My poor Layla look like 100 men cum all over her face…. that biatch Summer Rae WILL SUFFER!!!

You see w’happen when those 3MB idiots try to talk sh!t? Send for The Shield!!!! Ambrose & Reigns YOU GOT THIS!

Look at that fool Slater tryna get away… Spear by Reigns on the stage – BLAOW!!!!

OH LAWWWD Dean Ambrose has a twisted promo for Seth Rollins! HE’S GONNA F**K YOU UP ROLLINS!!!

Catch Seth Rollins! Full on suit!!! Hair tied back!!!! Watching the screen fromGRANT - BODY - P backstage! Roman Reigns is gonna f**k up Randall! So it’s safe to say that Randall ain’t winning that title at Money Inna Bank! And as for Triple…. I feel like I’m in attitude era again… I WANT THAT MUTHAF***A DEAD!!!! Reigns promises to destroy him!!! LET ME HELP YOU REIGNS!!! I need to invest in some swat gear!

Glad to see my baby cleaned herself up after that sketal Summer Rae tried to humiliate her…oh for f**k sake what the f**k is Damien Sandow wearing? Because Layla is here, I’m gonna stick around…

The fans cheering for Sandow!!!! I wished they cheered for him when he was in his purest form!

Ok we gonna see Xavier Woods lose to Bo Dallas…. oh man… word is Dallas gotta streak….. OH BRRRROOCCCK!!!!

Brock break Bo dallas streak

How dare the crowd chant muthaf***!n CM PUNK when two stars that come from NXT are performing for the crowd…. F**K YOU!

WHOA! RVD Vs Cesaro for Money Inna Bank match? This is not right!!!! I think both guys should be up in there! It’s gonna be a great contest though!

DAMN YOU PAUL HEYMAN! DAMN YOU TO HELL! Making me think that Brock Lesnar was in the building, to celebrate his victory over the don of dons, only to swerve and introduce Cesaro! It’s ok Heyman, keep talking that Undertaker sh!t and see w’happen! You think just because Undertaker lost at WrestleMania he’s not done with you??? OH BOY OH BOY!

This is a nice idea: For those who DON’T qualify, why don’t they compete in a  standard Money Inna Bank ladder match and put the briefcase up in that muthaf***a?

WROOOOY! Cesaro qualifies! This should be good!!!! Can he win? I wouldn’t rule it out!!!! Not after the André The Giant Battle Royal! No one saw Cesaro winning!

Before Seth Rollins breaks his silence: Let’s give a big BIG BIG!!!! 30TH BIRTHDAY SHOUT OUT TO THE MAN WHO STARTED THE SMACK TALK CENTRE,THE MASTERMIND HIMSELF!!! JAMIE MAVERICK SHIELDS!

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Sorry Seth Rollins, your music is wack!!! I told you to send for the Street Fighter IV Seth theme!

Why is Michael Cole interviewing him??? What happened to Miz TV? What happened to Jericho’s highlight reel? What happened to Piper’s Pit?

Anyway enough of that sh!t – Seth Rollins was like – Well I created The Shield, but it was a business ting. we defeated every 3 man combination, took out the best peoples. After Evolution who we gonna mash-up next? Exactly….gotta keep it moving…. Now I said my peace, if Reigns & Ambrose Feel Like An Enemy, COME AFTER ME!

Nice trap Rollins! The Wyatt mans was all up in there, while Rollins take foot and run! Who comes to save the day? YES your friend John Cena! I suppose Cena will join the Shield against the Wyatt man dem! Silence! the Divas are on!!!

Once again Paige battles Alicia Fox, and Alicia brought Aksana with her just to make sure everything is in order… more like she’s gonna TEEF!!!

I suppose Paige believes she gotta play fire with fire! bi-polar with bi-polar! And she defeats Alicia! UH-OH….. this weeks target – Aksana! Well I suppose Alicia sees Naomi has her ‘sista’…. that’s what you get for tryna take out her eye! ere, nyam this popcorn! And drink this water while you’re at it!!!! I don’t blame Alicia one bit! Gotta stick together sistas! You’ve seen the film SET IT OFF!

What? Oh no not Wack Swagger…. who’s his opponent? What? Santino? Ok time for the pudding… I’ll be right back…

Ok I’m back now…. that match is not of consequence. Now we move on to the main event. That Triple TEEF promises the end of The Shield… what does this mean then? Ambrose turns on Reigns? Reigns turns on Ambrose? Or the impossible – Cena turns evil against The Shield???

Ok maybe I’m asking too much… but The Undertaker’s streak brukk for Christ’s sake!

…and let the beatings begin!!!

Ok Seth Rollins where you at? I know you’re lurking somewhere! Randall – I’m not convinced that you posted a photo of yourself pon twitter about – you’re on vacation… for all I know that could have been a year ago! And Triple TEEF is walking around with that hammer surely!

That’s a bit embarrassing for Bray Wyatt? Or was it embarrassing for the Minneapolis crowd? Wyatt commands the maestro, and no one singing The Whole World In His Hands? Is that a sign that the WWE Universe are fed up with that song already?

Oh dear Cena’s 5 moves have failed! What is he gonna do now?

Not to worry – Roman Reigns spear to Harper – BLAOW!!!! Er so Triple, where was this grand scheme, this master plan to destroy the Shield for good? You just talking out your @$$ now ain’t ya! But the fact that Roman Reigns is after Triple’s Blodclart sweetens me, it’s almost like The Rock Vs Triple TEEF all over again…

GRANT BODY – P!

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The Jobber Blogger #108 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 29/5/14

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The Jobber Blogger

TNA try again this week, but it’s just drifting along for my liking. I’m hoping for a good solid Slammiversary, but one has to question, how do we get there?

EY’s momentum as Champ has certainly dipped, even the ratings are dropping in every main event segment, which shows perhaps that his pull to the Animals, isn’t that big of a draw.

EY Dolittle

Though it could also be that no-one cares about MVP, Bobby Lashley and Kenny King. Or perhaps, let’s be honest, how many times have we seen this take-over story now. Every year… literally, without fail. After 107 issues I still find myself wanting to say the words “I Hope”. Well, I don’t hope anymore. Fool me once, 4 years later, same old. I should have learnt by now to expect the worst. Drifting along is TNA at its best right now. Sure I like the team of MVP, Lashley and King, but perhaps something else would have been better rather than the tried and failed take-over story. Eric Young is good as the Champ, but I’m not drawn to him, never have been. If anything I miss his more wacky ways, bringing Austin Aries into the picture alongside Young just makes me want Aries as the Champ.

I honestly don’t know what they have planned, Bully is on a push, I bet that Roode comes back as a Face, Aries is on the rise, and you can’t count out MVP. Destination X is coming in quickly and I would expect that to be Champion crowning time. Unless it’s EY defending against say Kenny King.

Watching TNA these last few weeks have been enjoyable, but I’ve not felt excited to watch the show, hell I even forget to watch it sometimes, or it becomes a “I’ll fit it in”. Here’s hoping?…

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TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 29/5/14

Bully kicked off the show hot on the heels from his beat down last week. Everyone should love Bully, least respect him. I don’t feel he’s hit the level he was at a few years back, pre-Hogan married. Bully was a Bully, and he would tell you to your face, even as a fan Bully would scream at me and tell me why I respected him, and he was right. It’s a little odd to see him as such a full blown Face right now, sure he carries it, but it’s not his strength. Though not everyone can be heel, lord knows the majority prefer it.

James Storm piss people off

Bully unveiled Six Tables, one each for Spud, EC3, MVP, Lashley, King and of course Dixie Carter. Bully vowed to put everyone through Tables, which is being made such a big deal that there are only possible outcomes. Either Bully needs to put Dixie through a Table, which if you were a betting man, would be happening next month in New York, or, Bully pulls a 180, and we find out he’s been aligned with Dixie all-along to let MVP get into power with a plan in place from the get-go.

I think it’s leaning more toward Dixie going through a Table…. which seems absurd.

MVP with Lashley and King got in Bully’s business while EC3 and Spud jumped Bully from behind. EC3 grabs the Table which is reserved for Spud when EY, Aries and The Wolves come out to even the odds. Which of course ends with Spud being put through a Table by Bully.

MVP, Bobby Lashley and Kenny King vs. Austin Aries and The Wolves – 6 man Tag

The start to the show ended with this 6-Man tag. Least it has a somewhat productive opening. Sure the idea was to get people interested in the main-event, and putting Spud through a Table might set the stage for an exciting show to come. I swear if Impact kicked off every week with a Tigre Uno match, I would be a happy Blogger!

I’ve never looked at The Wolves without expecting to be impressed before. But I recently heard that someone wasn’t a fan, which is kind of an eye opener. You here great things from The Wolves, and then I just sort of expected them to perform at that level. On a personal note though, I still think they’re fantastic. But, when teemed with The Greatest Man that Ever Lived, they can only shine so much.

Aries was on fire, made the tag to the “injured” Davey Richards, who hit his Foot Stomp, but then got speared by Lashley with MVP finishing him off with his Yakuza kick for the Win.

Note that Bobby Lashley in a Tag-Team match who ran in for under 5 seconds, hit one move and left, was not an illegal interference.

Tigre Uno vs. Bram 

I can describe this match with one word, “Sucks!”

Now why does it suck. I can tell you, Bram’s singles match debut, was against Tigre Uno.

So Bram is supposed to be this hot-headed violent intense guy with a beard… and no, not Gunner.

If you go back to Lockdown where Uno made his debut, you heard nothing but praise for him, he just came off of an awesome Best of 3 Series with Sanada. His in-ring work is unique, and matches the style of which TNA was founded on. He has flying streamers in his entrance for crying out load. No one has any special gimmick in their entrance anymore. Yet Uno was squashed by Bram.

Uno didn’t even have any momentum, was just flat-lined. So yeah, they’re different guys for different styles of Wrestling, but to bury Uno so quickly was painful to watch.

On the plus side however Bram did have good music, I don’t like his socks on his legs or arms though. For someone claiming to be a tough guy, he shouldn’t be wearing socks that high. Is that a legitimate critique…. yes, yes it is.

Bram hit an Impaler DDT, which was pretty neat, takes you back to old school Edge and Gangrel. Magnus wasn’t impressed with Bram though and decided Bram should fight Willow next week. I do love how this no longer has anything to do with Willow, aside from that Willow is looked upon as this “crazy guy”, yet is easily beaten down. He’s only won because of hesitation, not because he’s scary or violent, or anything positive. Just Jeff Hardy in flares screaming like a woman.

The Bromans vs. Anderson and Gunner 

Lots of Tag-Team matches this week, but they’re good ways to build storylines at the same time. We actually found out that Anderson has served in the US Military, which explains my recent interest in Anderson patriotic attire. So on that ground, I like the comparison already between he and Gunner. Through in Gunner’s interest in trying to help out Sam Shaw, and Anderson being responsible, it creates a good dynamic. I like that. What about James Storm?

Nothing really major to report about the match, aside from DJ Zema was being even more annoying than usual with his DJ desk..and I loved it! It cracks me up every time you hear the horn. I wish they actually played on it more so that it acted as a good distraction. It just doesn’t get old, and the fact that it probably annoys the hell out of some people, that’s just perfection! The next step is to wind people up in the crowd and actually Film their reactions.

Either way, Anderson hit the Mic Check, Gunner followed it up with his Diving Head-Butt for a Win.

The second anyone mentions a Losing Streak or Winning Streak you know a Storyline is going to be in place. And sure enough, The Bromans on a losing streak, then The Menagerie turn up.

Which is good on one hand because they have yet to find a “place” or a focus.

Rebel now has glow sticks to dance with, not really as daring as Fire Dancing, but it still works. Crazy Steve is even more awesome, The Freak sucks. I want Knux to wear a Hat, it would just finish the look. I’m a big music guy, but I don’t actually like The Menagerie’s music, it’s too “Rocky” rather than being more dark, weird and carnival like. The traditional Carnival music they play before they enter is more to my liking.

The Freak through around Zema, that was it. Hopefully this actually leads to some matches, as we’ve yet to see anything from The Menagerie since their debut.

Freak Train

 The Beautiful People vs. Brittany and Gail Kim

Brittany went to Madison Rayne about helping her out in this tag-team match, but Madison refused, telling Brittany not to get involved, and making her promise she wouldn’t have the match. So Brittany asked Gail instead and danced around is if they were best friends.

Again, the match didn’t really do anything. I find the Beautiful People to be rather enjoyable. There’s just something about Angelina that I love. I love her promo’s where she’s just horrible to people, and as annoying as possible, it makes me smile.

Angelina Love

Gail Kim is an awesome Wrestler, let’s just put that out there. She can Wrestle so much better than most Women, through in Mickie James and Tara. Either way, Brittany got tagged in, (she’s not too bad either!) so Brittany and Velvet were the legal two. Angelina hit Brittany with the Botox Injection, then Velvet pinned Brittany and The Beautiful People won.

Yet Tenay was all over Angelina for cheating, and being Illegal. That makes no sense. Every tag-match has the legal and illegal members running around everywhere. Only the legal contender can be the deciding factor. Angelina’s involvement is no more illegal than Bobby Lashley’s to kick off the show, yet that was fine. Stuff like that winds me up! It’s the same rule for everyone!

Anyhow, Brittany they got up and called out Madison Rayne, asking Madison why she didn’t help Brittany in the first place. Brittany was annoyed that Madison doesn’t like her, “The whole thing is getting weird”, and then Brittany declares that she likes Madison. Wow, didn’t see that coming. Oh wait.

So the fans chant Boring really loudly over the segment as Madison announces a Rematch next week against Angelina for the Knockouts Championship. Here’s a guess, Brittany makes Madison lose. Called it.

Bully Ray vs. EY – EC3 Special Referee

Earlier on in the night, Dixie accompanied by EC3 called out MVP, to continue their talk from last week. Money Power and nonsense aside, Bully and EY then crashed the segment. Both of which were fired up but being talked down by the other “Time and Place”.

Till the main event was made, EY vs. Bully.

Kenny King came out first to be the Special Ring Announcer, Bobby Lashley was the special Enforcer and MVP was the Special Time Keeper.

Bully and EY had a little bit of a match, something that is supposed to look like “mutual respect”. I think we were supposed to think, gee, I want to see EY vs. Bully for the World Championship without the interference of MVP and co.

But no, I don’t want to see that. Unless Bully turns heel and takes the belt.

The match didn’t run too long before Bully just Booted EC3 in the face. This in turn just kicked things off as Lashley, King and MVP jumped in on the attack.

Then Samoa Joe returned got involved, beat them up and stared down MVP to close the show.

Quite a good return, but, what does that mean.

On a side note, I remember Dixie saying that Rampage Jackson is ready to come back soon, and if he returned, maybe with King Mo to join up with MVP, that I would be interested in.

Till then,

Dan Wilkinson

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Monday Night Raw #1097: June 2, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer

data:text/mce-internal,

I figured out why wrestling idiots said Payback was rubbish… because you didn’t turn up. Hopefully Philip Brooks, they will finally leave you alone.

Where are your CM Punk memes now Ian Cooper?! How do you like your hero now Ash Blick? Even Nicola Box is ashamed, and removed the ‘CM Punk’ from her name…

When will you fools learn that you cannot test the lyrical manifestations of the Infamous Informer???!!! RAW #1097, HOLD DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZFace it Evolution! You Evolved back in 2005. IT’S OVER FOR YOU! The Shield are far too strong! I think all three should be the World Wrestling Federation Champion straight away! If Danny can’t fight, give the belt to the Shield!!! BELIEVE IN THOSE OFFICIAL BAD MANS! TWICE IN A ROW MUTHAF***A!

Oh my god look at Triple’s eye!!!! BLODCLART!!!

What??? I thought you said the rivalry dun at Payback Triple? Oh for f**k sake fans CM Punk is DUN! Don’t chant his name – he loves hockey now.

OH SNAP!!!! First Brie Bella, now Batista just quit the WWE as well??? He can’t do that!!!(Oh I think you’ll find he can Grant… he gotta promote his Guardians of the Galaxy film!!!) Evolution D-U-N – DUN!!!!!

Question – why the f**k is Cesaro walking like that??? Him look like he’s constipated and sh!t!!!!

Question #2 – why aren’t the fans now chanting Batista??? He quit in Triple’s face…. chant his name then! Where’s all your memes? I bet you will all be queuing up at the cinema to see his film…. YOU DUMB RARSE!

So in this team of RVD & Sheamus Vs Cesaro and Barrett, RVD gets the pin on Barrett… does that mean RVD gets another shot at the I.C. title??? I have to ask these things because the wrestling fans need to know these things!!!!

Question #3 – why aren’t you chanting Brie Bella??? Or should I say Brianna Danielson? She quit in Stephanie’s face, and Yes! Yes! Yes! her way out of the building! Don’t you want her to come back???

Look what they have done to Damien Sandow…this is a heartbreak… please creative let this lead to somewhere… what happened to his robe, and telling muthaf***az SILENCE! And his cart-wheel?

WELL IT’S THE BIG SHOW!!! Well I’m glad he’s in this segment and not tryna stop Rusev because I fear that’s where that storyline is going…

PPPPPPPPP!!! Thank you Big Show! He just punched Sandow through school-buses like Froch did to Groves!

All you gotta do is BOLIEVE! He goes up against Kofi Kingston. Question #4: Where’s my hero Kane to interrupt the proceedings????

Oh dear! the crowd chanting BOring!!!!! They can’t do that!!!!! (Er yes they can Grant, They paid their money!)

OH NO! Stephanie is going to the ring to make an announcement about the WWE GRANT - BODY - PWorld Heavyweight Championship??? Yo Danny! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!! DON’T LOOK BACK!!!

Oh no Batista this is what you may want to hear! And you quit?

Is that how it goes down in the streets? If Danny can fight by the end of this month, he has to fight Kane in a stretcher match? No Steph! Make it an ambulance match! If not then the Money in the Bank match will have both titles hung in the air??? What’s Cena doing out here? You not the face of the company any more muthaf***a!!!

So he drops real talk on Stephanie’s fine @$$ and on top talks about her t!tt!£$… she sets my hero Kane on him!!! Embrace the hate John!!!! Hopefully Kane will start going after Nikki Bella! DO IT KANE!! GET DEM T!TT!£$!!!

Well thank you very much Los Matodores and that bullsh!t 3MB… I went to make my pudding because you jabronies were on and look what you make me do, trip up on the wire and accidentally lock off the laptop… not only that, I missed my girl Alicia Fox… I don’t know what the f**k she did so I’m gonna play this footage right here… apparently she was cussing bad words in Germany…. can she do that??? That is Question 6!

You think I’m interested in that Adam Rose/Wack Swagger match??? F**k that I’m watching this video!

Fans – STOP CHANTING THAT MUTHAF**!NG CM PUNK! HE DOESN’T GIVE A FLYING F**K ABOUT YOU! Brie Bella and Batista does! CHANT THEIR NAMES! I swear this CM Punk thing is getting me angry star! IT’S F**KING OVER! STOP BEING SO F**K!NG RETARDED! WHEN WILL YOU GET IT THROUGH YOUR JEREMY KYLE THICK SKULLS??? That’s Question 7!!!

Oh dear…. The Wyatt man dem are here… but there is an empty rocking chair… oh dear! Cena what you done to Bray??? YOU KILLED HIM??!!! That’s Question 8!

Talking of chairs, what do you think of this special chair that I’m making for Ian Cooper? STC’s #1 CM Punk fan who got fooled the most? That’s Question 9!

SAW Get In The Chair

PUSH HARD THOUGH IAN!!!!

Oh man these Wyatt mans do not ramp! They seek vengeance… and defeated the USOs… can you imagine Harper & Rowan as tag team champions? It would be all over for the tag team division!

Bertie Vs Ziggler in a Money In The Bank qualifying match? BACKING BERTIE HERE! COME ON BERTIE!

That’s it crowd, chant for Ziggler… he is there fighting… he cares about you… I don’t care about him personally, but he CARES!

YES!!!! That’s a tap out!!! Ziggler nah go nowhere!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! BERTIE ADVANCES!!!! YES!

Ok… can Rybaxel win again??? two nights in a row? It could be huge!!!!

WHOA!!!!! Rybaxel win again???? Backfoot! The end is near!!!!

Rusev is about to be honored by the Russian Federation Ceremony? For what – beating on our brothers??? I wanna hear wither ‘Kick In the Door Wave in the 4-4 or ‘Somebody gonna get their @$$ kicked?!’ But this means Lana gonna be there with her tight blouse & skirt… Lana is that girl – you gotta go Lexington Steele on her @$$! You just cannot help but think pornographic thoughts when you see Lana! Like I couldn’t bring her home to mom, nah-mean?!

HA! HA! You can’t tell the crowd to stop their USA chants Lana! They want to put their d!ck in your mouth! Even the women!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Cue the Russian Anthem! WROOOOY!!! Listen to how it sounds triumphant! Here’s Question 10 – Does Rusev know the words? Considering he’s actually Samoan?!

Word up – how many teams can say they brukk up every member of Evolution? NONE!!! The Shield are OFFICIAL BAD MANS!!!

You hear that Randall? Get out here so that Roman Reigns can brukk you up with the symbol of excellence!!!! So Triple comes out with the symbol of disgrace! HE HAS BROUGHT THE HAMMER!

Wait a minute – NO!!!! Seth Rollins!!!! But…But…But!!!! I thought you were brothers??? Why you took a Triple TEEF endorsed chair and destroy your brothers??? Why? Tell me WHY??? DAMN SON!!!

Let’s be real about one thing: We knew someone was gonna turn evil, STC’s Negrodamus predicted that it would be Roman Reigns… but Seth Rollins? I forgot, his name is Seth…. suddenly that music springs to mind… if you are a Street fighter fan, you know what I mean!

BEHOLD THE GLORY THAT IS THE TANDEM ENGINE!!! This should be Seth Rollins new music!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

#VOCAREADREGNUM!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#GWARNYUHBED

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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The Infamous Informer

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Monday Night Raw #1096: May 26, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer

THIS IS NOT RIGHT! Stephanie McMahon won the women’s title back in 2000, she never defended that sh!t.

THIS IS NOT RIGHT! Dean Ambrose won the US title and held it for 352 days… he never defended it in half that time.

THIS IS NOT RIGHT! Your Wrestling God CM Punk, held the WWE title for 434 days, he was injured for about a few months in that time, and never had to give up his title.

THIS IS NOT RIGHT! Now Danny Bryan, just won the title at WrestleMania, suffers a neck injury, had successful surgery, should be back in a couple of months at best, but suddenly Triple TEEF and Stephanie McTEEF want him to surrender his title???

THIS IS JUST NOT RIGHT!!!

Are we going into the Payback PPV without a Championship match??? RAW #1095, HOLD DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF LogoNotice that when usually WWE does a Memorial Day tribute video or Tribute to the Troops package John Cena usually does the narrating? Why isn’t he doing it now??? I’m jussayin…

ENOUGH!!! LET’S GET INTO IT!!!

OH NO…. not the Authoritaaah! I guess there is no messing about! Danny Bryan! GIVE UP THE GOODS!!!

But before the main event, looks like they called out Brad Maddox…. I think dude is gonna be fired…. Yeah FIRE HIS B!TCH @$$!

Brad said he was forced by The Shield???? WRONG ANSWER!!!!! Look w’happen now… IT’S KANE!!!!

What is worse than being fired??? My Hero Kane grabbing that scrawny neck of Maddox… CHOKESLAM!!!! BLAOW!!! Pick him up, turn him upside down…. TOMBSTONE! TOMBSTONE!!!!! Oh SNAP!!! HE IS FIRED!!! Can he take this to the tribunal??? I don’t like his chances!

Hold up – Cesaro is gonna fight RVD? And Paul Heyman has mentioned nothing about his Client Brock Lesnar conquering the Undertaker’s Streak?

Oh snap! Bad News for RVD! He’s not gonna win the Intercontinental title, but good news for us! He’s at commentary!

Hol on – Bad News for Barrett! RVD just kicked him in his mouth!!! Oh dear RVD gonna pay for that surely!

There you go! Distraction by Barrett baited up the – enough of that sh!t – Sheamus just kicked Cesaro in his mouth!!!! DAYUM!!!!!

Payback WWERing the alarm!!! Eva Marie is about to fight!!!! Run to the toilet for your lives!!!

I can’t believe they made Summer Rae a ‘face’… I get it – it’s all that Total Divas business…

Don’t you think it should be the other way round? Eva Marie as the ‘face’ and Summer as the ‘heel since Summer seems to be disliked on Total Divas terms…

LOOK PON LAYLA’S DRESS! GOOD GAWD ALMIGHTY! SAY IT AGAIN JAY-BEE! SHE DOES LOOK AMAZING!

Batista is my friend but big ups to Cody Rhodes who just called him a skinny jeans sell out and his bredrin – RK-BLOW! Oh boy gotta give props to the Rhodes bruddas but they gonna get brukk up by EVILOUTION!

Oh no not this 3.5MB and this Los Jobbodor nonsense…. this is the part where I go to the toilet, wash my hands, get a pack of cookies, top up my glass of Black Grape and check the meter and hit the emergency so that the electric doesn’t go out on me!

WTF??? Hornswoggle pulls off the tail of El Torito then in the back the doc puts it back on??? That ain’t PG mayyyyyn!!!

Why have I got this feeling that Bray Wyatt is gonna make that into a single – He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands??? I wonder – do they still sing that at primary school?

OH SNAP!!! Bray Wyatt just said that Cena is the enemy of us all! And the capacity crowd cheered!

I can’t believe the Wyatt man dem brukk up JAY-BEE! OH SNAP!

Damn they put Jerry Lawler on blast!!! All he did was big up Cena… he was gonna send for the Sister Abigail!!! Big ups to The USOs for coming to save Lawler’s clart! Not sure I agree with Cena saying Wyatt crossed the line… for Wyatt to cross the line he would have to rape Nikki Bella! YEAH I SAID IT! And get her pregnant too! THE FORBIDDEN SEED!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Holy crap – Zack Ryder gets TV Time! BLODCLART!!!! Susan Brunton step away from the….


Pic courtesy of STC member Lee Steadx
Maybe I need to step away from the cocoa butter!!! First Layla now Lana with her tight blouse and skirt!!! But Rusef…. KILL RYDER! KILL HIM!!!! LET’S GO!!!

No use chanting USA!!! Not even Hulk Hogan can save you now!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Hold up – Big E!!! He just gave Rusev some Black Fist beatings!!!! Reppin for USA and his people!!!! You know what that means! I gotta draw for the tune!

Oh man! I knew Cody flying around the ring would land him a RKO – BLAOW!!! And that Triple TEEF just changed the rules! Now it’s a no holds barred elimination match? they gonna f**k up Goldust! I call INJUSTICE!!! It is No Holds Barred!!! COME DOWN THE STAIRS GUYS!!!

RKO followed by a Batista Bomb through the canvas – BLAOW!!!! Sh!t… they didn’t come down the stairs… damn… I suppose it’s time to BO-lieve…

Ok let me see this Bo Dallas fighting style…. I heard negativity already from the IWC… they don’t give these cats a chance…

He’s not too bad!!! His super move is the BO-DOG, well it’s a more hefty version of Spike Dudley’s move, that’s it… hold up, where is that fool in the world today? Last time I saw him, he got his @$$ whupped by Stone Cold Steve Austin because AustinGrant & Leanna cussed down Molly Holly… you fat @$$ ungrateful b!tches…. why don’t you jump on that muthaf***!n treadmill, wipe the dust off that muthaf***a, and BOlieve that you can shed that weight instead of being keyboard warriors? Too fat to even climb into a wrestling ring, but are quick to cuss down these new cats? F**KOUTTAHERE!

HERE WE GO!!! Stephanie is here!!! Time for Danny Bryan to GIVE UP THE GOODS!


Well well well how about that then? Let’s be real – we knew Danny wouldn’t give up his title… after all he has valid reason not to and I agree 100%! Ever since he won at big BIG WrestleMania they tried to take the title from him anyway! He just said NO in Stephanie’s face to the point where Steph had to wipe the spit fire from her face!

Here’s the twist! Steph didn’t even slap Danny in the face! she thought that ain’t gonna hurt him, what will hurt him is that if he doesn’t give up the goods at Payback, then Brie Bella is fired!!!! Stephanie McTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!!! Death of the Bella Twins!

More Divas! I love this!!!! Alicia Fox! Emma-lution! Backing Alicia here!!!! Get her Alicia! Brukk her up! Emma can’t dance!

OH SNAP!!!! Emma won???? Er… bad move Emma! You should have let her win!

Oh my days Alicia KILLS IT! Throwing beer all over herself, beating up cameramen, pulling out the biggest wedgie since your beloved attitude era – I’m sure DX did something similar! Ringing the bell crazy! Er Paige… if I was you… I’d just lay your @$$ down for the 3…. it’s not worth it man! I’m sure STC’s Ash Blick would love to jump off top ropes on your @$$!

I’m not gonna speak on Adam Rose and ‘Davy Crockett’… but the Payback kick off YouTube match – El Torito Vs Hornswoggle in a Mask Vs Hair match???? Well THE GRANT SAYS – Hornswoggle…. GET IN THE CHAIR!!!

For a minute I thought I had nothing to write on the Bertie Vs Sheamus match, I can say two things…one , Sheamus looks f**ked up like he suffered a concussion, and two, I was wondering how long it would be before Heyman would announce that his client Brock Lesnar conquered the Undertaker’s streak at WrestleMania!

HERE WE GO!!!! Contract signing between The Shield and Evolution and The Shield are in business already! dashing out the chairs! We don’t need that sh!t!

Triple TEEF is acting like he got the hammer and the shovel ready for Sunday!!!

WTF are the crowd chanting???? Answers on a postcard please!

Paperwork out the way… BRING THE F**K!N RUCKUS!!!

OH NO!!! Triple TEEF has drawn for the hammer!!!! And he lick dem all down!!!! TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!!! Set up the announce table, hoisted up Roman Reigns, all those months of powerbombing muthaf***az through tables has come back to haunt him! Batista with the powerbomb – BLAOW!!!! HIM DEAD NOW!!!

This is how it goes down! payback, Sunday June 1, 2014, someone ain’t getting up after 10, a diva is gonna go crazy whether she wins or loses, one team will be completely annihilated and somebody’s job is on the line and could be ‘fired’…. Yes I put that in quotations because what if my hero Kane is back there? How do you like your Brie Bella??? Cooked well done or Extra crispy???

Plus? Will STC Admin Ian Cooper’s dream come true? Will his beloved saviour come back and save the WWE? Oh he better hope and pray because if he is an atheist he better get himself baptized ASAP! I have a feeling Philip is gonna let him down again! And then…. THE CHAIR AWAITS… GRIM REAPER CALLING – JUDGMENT DAY!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

#VOCAREADREGNUM!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#GWARNYUHBED

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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The Jobber Blogger #107 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 22/5/14

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The Jobber Blogger

This might be a first, it is currently 1:42am, and I am settling in for Writing up The Jobber Blogger. Yes, it’s late, I know. I do like the routine of Writing this up by Sunday at the latest and then it’s ready to go as soon as Impact airs in the UK. Though for those unaware, it is Half Term time…. in May. When the hell did this happen? I don’t remember ever having so much time off when I was in school. They’ve only just gone back from Easter! Weeks, that’s all it’s been and now the bloody kids are off again and I have to work more! Though in turn they are keeping me employed by actually…. turning up and creating business. Without the holidays my work would be rather quiet indeed!

And no, it’s not a camp, or weird Children related industries. It’s a Cinema, sure I’ve mentioned that before. Who cares.

Impact is same old same old this week, and no that’s not a “bad” thing…. it’s just not a great thing.

It’s different enough to feel different, and that is a good thing. Impact Wrestling

TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 22/5/14

One would hope that The Jobber Blogger will be up on time next week, but hey, not enough of you send this around for it to be a job! That’s a joke… I don’t think I can get paid by ranting about Wrestling shows…. what’s that, you can?

Well I’m probably not at “that” level, I like things my way, and to hell with talking about the show and reviewing the show and giving things Ratings. Stupid, irrelevant, pointless. Opinions! That’s what matters, mine isn’t better than yours, but I wrote my down, so suck it.

One thing TNA has been doing lately to piss me off, is the use of Kazarian. It seems it’s becoming a tradition to send out your Stars the worst possible way. AJ Styles, big title push, kick him off the show, bring him back, screw him over. Sting, sent out in a equally humiliating manor. Kurt Angle, injured at every step. And now, Kazarian, who had to job to Knux, run around Crazy Steve, and this week, the show kicked off with MVP, Lashley and King arriving. Kaz was on the phone with a “hang on Chris” which was a nice little touch, then he got beat up by Kenny King. Was that Kazarian’s last ever bit of work for TNA, getting beaten up for looking at a black guy. I’m going to miss Bad Influence, and hey, I’m not stranger to Ring of Honour, but we already know Christopher Daniels is going back with a “mystery” tag partner, who we all guess is Kazarian, so if they both turn up, I’m going to watch….. probably.

So MVP, Lashley and King kick off Impact, I do wish they didn’t push this little opening. They didn’t really explain any motivations for their “Heel turn” aside from just – Money, Power, Respect.

I don’t think having each of them take it in turn to talk about themselves and why they did what they did really achieved anything. But hey, been there done that storyline, why make anything else different?

I like a good Heel turn as much as the next guy, but what I like better is when it doesn’t need to be for reasons, that require said individual to walk out in the opening of the next show and explain why he isn’t a sell out.

Lots of ass-kissing, visionary this, money power that, a mention of “Dat Paper” later and The Wolves come out to confront MVP.

Now if The Wolves were aligned would have been cool, but then of course it would be better if they were black. Again, not in a racist manor, but I think that’s cool, I like that.

The Wolves did the usual “we looked up to you”, thankfully a good mention of “once they were like brothers” was not in the script. Though it was mentioned later on between Davey and Eddie themselves, don’t think I didn’t spot that, TNA.

MVP called Davey, Eddie, not sure if that was a joke or not, or just a plain human error… I chuckled a little, though if it was the other way round and Davey called MVP, Kenny by accident.. well that’s just a whole different level of BooBoo.

Lashley then Speared Eddie in the ring, and MVP walked Davey to the edge of the Ramp where Lashley speared Davey off the Ramp through a Table on the floor. Awesome way to start the show, aside from the inane chit chat, a good bit of Stage Throwing does wonders for my Wrestling appetite. Dat Paper

Just when you think you’re done with the Opening Dialogue of the show, Eric Young came out to talk about MVP. So yay, that happened! And then straight away MVP, Lashley and King are back out. It’s not Total Nonstop Promo, level’s of bad and annoying. But Wrestling damn it. You have no idea how good a Wrestling Match is to kick off Impact. Start the show with The Menagerie, that would be neat.

Anyway, good ol’ respectable Champ Eric Young jumped to the name calling game, Scumbag, Sell-out, words thrown around. Who cares! Why do you need to put names on people you don’t like. Surely calling them out to call them names is as childish as rolling on the floor trying to punch each other… oh wait.

They all get a fight, Austin Aries runs out to EY’s aid, set up matches for later. Couldn’t they have done this before? Why didn’t EY or Aries help out poor Davey. Meh, whatever.

Angelina Love vs. Brittany – Knockouts Championship – Open Challenge

Angelina offered out this Open Challenge, which is only for those who have never held the Knockouts Championship before. Of course this was played as Angelina “dodging” the competition. This also annoys me. What is it, a Month or so since The Beautiful People reformed, Angelina came back strong, not taking any crap, said it straight as it is. Took the fight to Madison, beat her up, took the Belt from her, she was dominating the Division, and now she’s scared of everyone, in how many weeks?

Why is it that she’s running away from Gail, and Gail is no longer backing down from anyone, Gail has been backing out of fights for years. I get it, Wrestling, good guy, bad guy. But it doesn’t make sense, and I don’t like it.

I want a Champion who is a Heel, who is dominant, and won’t run, won’t budge, and kicks ass. James Storm – World Champ, I want it.

As much as this might “irk” me a little, there is however a silver lining, a word that allows the complete 180. This does suck, Velvet a little help BUTT

Indeed, this does suck, But, Velvet did point at her rear whilst saying the Word but. I don’t know why, but I’m not afraid to admit that I “lol’d” a little.

So yes, Brittany accepted the Open Challenge (who else is there…. really, who is there?) though perhaps if it happens again, then Taryn Terrell might turn up, so if Angelina does defeat Gail, then my money is on that return.

Regardless! Distraction from Velvet, Angelina wins etc etc. With her almost losing to Brittany, but thanks to Velvet’s distraction didn’t, again, I get it, good guy, bad guy, etc, but really? butt really

They put some lipstick on Brittany, which I thought was a nice gesture, bag on the head, Gail out, fight. Usual stuff. Angelina vs. Gail at Slammiversary? Angelina better win.
Austin Aries vs. MVP

So this happened, a Rematch from the first time they fought. So it seems Aries is back currently. I don’t know who long for, but just having him on TV makes the world of difference. Oh how I’ve missed Austin Aries. I do think if things carry on the way they are, then Destination X could be very interesting for Aries.

Though I’m probably wrong.

As much as I’d love to say this match was great and Aries is back on point… it really wasn’t that special. The usual match, Aries throws around MVP, because he’s a bad guy now, so he gets beat up more, it’s a conscience thing. One might even say Con-Science. But also probably not.

Aries was in control went to hit his 450 Splash, King and Lashley both came out to attack Aries. EY then back out to help.

Dixie then turned up with EC3, and finally confronted MVP, offering a delightful question of “what I can do for you”. Which is much better, Dixie wanting a united front between her and MVP. Though it could turn out to be a suckered MVP in and then take over once more. I don’t know anymore.

Bully wasted no time in going after Dixie, but it was King, Lashley and MVP who beat Bully down, with EC3 putting Bully through a Table.
Magnus (w/Bram) vs. Willow – Falls Count Anywhere

I do feel that this might boil over to Magnus vs. Bram, and suddenly I’m rooting for Magnus. When did this happen. Willow sucks at this point. He’s just Jeff Hardy, being an idiot, getting thrown around whilst he screams like a woman. There’s a phrase for it…. looked good on paper

Bram Flakes wasted no time in shouting at Magnus to hit Willow in the head with the, crow pliers, thing. “Cave his head in!” in a lovely British tone, reminds me of the recent elections.

Alas, Magnus swung for the gut, but wouldn’t and couldn’t bring himself to hit Willow in the head, which is a good thing. And then Magnus lost, once again doing the right thing, and paying the consequences… he’s like Spider-Man.

Sort of.

Spider Magnus Eddie Edwards makes his way back after being with Davey in the “hospital”. He then calls out MVP, Lashley or King for a fight, King answers and they brawl.

I actually like King a lot in this position. I’ve always been a big fan of his, but he’s struggled to find his place. Even being a bad guy recently didn’t quite feel right, but him being a hot headed, slightly unhinged guy running with the power. I like it. I even like his silly cackle, laughing at people who get injured. Also this segment does a lot to put over Edwards, another good move to balance out the playing field between he and Davey.

Anderson and Storm met in a Bar to compete in a Drinking Contest. Anderson drank Water whilst Storm got drunk, then Anderson took advantage and beat him up. He didn’t take advantage and put the “moves” on Storm, like most people would in that position. o.O I’m not quite sure what I admitted to in that sentence.

Storm love

Eric Young vs. Bobby Lashley

Main Event time and EY took to battle against Lashley. One thing I can say, Lashley = Impressive.

The more I see him in action, the more I like him. I’m glad he’s a big part of this puzzle, and it can’t do anything to hurt him going forward.

Pretty much the same outcome as MVP vs. Aries, only Brian Hebner was threatened to “do the right thing” by MVP before the match.

EY hit the Piledriver, King and MVP out on the attack. Lashley hits the Spear, and Powerslam, Hebner doesn’t DQ and Lashley pins the Champ.

Aries then comes back to EY’s aid with a Kendo Stick, though it didn’t phase Lashley, and MVP, King and Lashley all stood tall to close the show.

So nothing new, but I do like this Stable of MVP, King and Lashley. I actually hope it gets added to.

I do think Bobby Roode and or Abyss will come back to even the odds soon enough.

This might just be “sailing” along, but it’s not boring. I do feel MVP, King and Lashley are legit enough to sell this rise to Power better than the likes of The Aces and Eights and especially Immortal.

I hope TNA don’t look at “correcting” this for Bound for Glory, to yet another temporary power storyline leading into more of the same in 2015. Sick of it now, no matter who is in charge.

Till then,

Dan Wilkinson

www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

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The Jobber Blogger #106 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 15/5/14

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The Jobber Blogger

So last week turned out a little bit negative. And sure, my cynical negativity has branched out further in other areas, but at least this week’s Impact ended on a note to pull me back to the middle ground. But first, the Negativity!

Kazarian is officially done with TNA, and so is Hernandez. Now, I don’t want to come across mean, but I’m somewhat surprised Hernandez was still on the Roster. He’s good, but he just didn’t “fit” that well in anything. The best thing he had going was with Chavo, and Chavo was just as terrible, so it’s only right they both be gone. Now on the flip side of that is Bad Influence. Kaz and Daniels, TNA originals, and of course with AJ Styles they make the trio of that core group people love, I guess you can make an argument for Samoa Joe… bets on how long he will last?

This is the run down, TNA apparently didn’t even offer new contracts to Kaz and Daniels and decided to let them go. So you can say, well that’s insulting after how many years? But of course the alternative is pretty simple too. Christopher Daniels, I love the dude, but I can be honest and say I was never that keen on him prior to Bad Influence. He was alright, I didn’t think his look suited his gimmick, I didn’t really like the Fallen Angel gimmick. Kazarian also impressed me in the ring, but again he had a hard time finding his place. When Fortune was created, Kazarian popped. But unfortunately he never really had any ball to run with, even a small deflated one.

AJ Styles’ life was made difficult by Kaz and Daniels, and at that time rendering them somewhat unlikable, Kaz turning on AJ, Daniels being a douche. But then something happened, AJ went on to do his own thing and from it, Bad Influence was born. Now the beauty about Bad Influence is that TNA pretty much gave Kaz and Daniels the keys to their own creativity. And what you got was two best friends, being themselves, albeit a more hyped up offensive version at times. But everything come Amazing Spider-man to Stupid T-Shirts, to calling the Fan’s “Ass Puppets” and more, it just worked. Throw back Thursdays, EGO, everything they were doing worked. Now in the ring, they worked even better. Kaz and Daniels can WRESTLE, end of. And they are damn good at it. When you can put themselves across through Bad Influence, that draws a whole lot of eyes and hype to their Matches, and they deliver, that makes them something special. The fact they only held the belts for a short amount of time is a joke. Specially in a Division that barely exists… that they are in the middle of. They had no competition to their level, yet they weren’t considered to hold the Championships. Regardless, in the long history of TNA, Kaz and Daniels probably rank somewhere low, given that they haven’t hit the Main Event status over half of TNA’s roster has. So really, they probably just don’t fit with the Direction TNA are going. Which is sad, but it is a business. They aren’t young guys anymore, the key to success in Wrestling is to keep things fresh, and hope that the freshness works. Being in a tight spot financially and you have two guys who you probably really like, but don’t have anything for them right now, why would you keep them on the pay checks? It’s a tough call, but if they can afford Four brand new Hot Indy Talents on the same wage to try and develop their future potential, then that’s the safe bet.

I wouldn’t say the Door is closed, aside from the fact that you do start to wonder how long TNA can keep going at times. The problem is this, sure Global Force Wrestling is on the Horizon, and that’s exciting. Now I would love a TNA version 2.0 where the guys who were messed around buy those in power got their chance to make a Career they should have had. What does it say when you start a Brand New Wrestling promotion and fill it with guys who are known as TNA Guys, been on TV for over 10 years. The people that don’t care about TNA and those talents, that’s already gone. A new promotion should be a good balance for sure, but ideally, it’s new talent, new belts, new stories, new feel, new stars. So I wonder where Kaz and Daniels will end up, but I sure hope they land somewhere to carry on.

So yes, I have grown accustom to their departure, yet it does still sour me. Not from a business perspective, because I totally understand it. I suppose when Bad Influence is gone, and Rob Terry is back… how do you deal with that reality?

Sooner or later TNA is going to be a completely different place, with very little Original Stars left. It’s almost like WWE losing Rock and Austin, which… they also did… but they didn’t go anywhere else.

And on the swing into the positive, TNA did at least please me in some regard. What regard? Well Read on!

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TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 15/5/14

Eric Young kicked off the show, ticked from last week’s turn from MVP. EY even went so far as to “promise – this kind of stuff doesn’t happen on my watch”. I don’t understand how that would even be possible.

EY is probably the good Fall Guy for someone to Turn against. EY is obviously popular, so it can develop a Heel (MVP) pretty quickly. Having a Trusting Face that MVP was turn against that guy, can work well too. You just need to keep on top of it, because the great Heels very quickly become fan favourites, and that’s bad news for your goody too shoes Champion.

We at least managed to avoid a “Why MVP Why?” segment. Anyone who knows me, will know that I can’t stand the “reasons” speech.

I mean it was there still, it was just better than I expected. MVP is out to control all the power, plain and simple, nothing personal, no other business, he just wants the Championship.

I do like that. I’ve been saying I want someone to just step up and take the fight to the Champion. I do think MVP can quickly be a “turn and run” guy. Whereas someone like James Storm can probably achieve the same results in his opposition.

Willow vs. Magnus and Bram – 2 on 1

I don’t really know what to say. The more we see Willow the more stupid he gets. I like the idea, but it’s just maybe too late for Jeff to develop it. Clearly TNA has too much invested in Jeff Hardy that they won’t let him develop it. It’s almost at the stage of “here’s Jeff Hardy being weird again”.

He’s not a Character.. he’s Jeff being a Character… and a Wrestling show about guys with “real problems” and gripes being these Characters, acting it out… you don’t need another dimension on top of that. I suppose it can either be a really good thing… or more often than not be utterly dumb.

I hope that Willow can get established, because it does open the Doors for future potential. IE Jeff comes back as himself, and sooner or later is under stress, leading into a more “Hardcore” environment, and he could transform to Willow. I just don’t know if it would work so well given that it’s Jeff.

Again on the plus side, I am liking Bram so far. I think he is playing this “best friend” angel rather well, and doesn’t seem to be that bothered by the fact that No-body knows who he is. I am wondering how long it is before TNA put him in a new Tag-Team with James Storm though.

StormFlakes

It could work…

Magnus is trying to find his inner violence… which is confusing in itself. Normally in these circumstances the one trying to find themselves is the good guy… right. Yet Jeff is the good guy, I don’t know. It doesn’t matter. I just don’t think Magnus needs yet another “change”.

Bram threw a Crowbar, pipe, wrench, stick at Magnus to use against Willow, Magnus refused then got pinned, leaving Bram annoyed. Angry Bram is bad… bram.

Gail Kim vs. Velvet Sky

So Gail came out, high fiving Fans, shaking hands, generally encouraging the fans to a sea of Gail Kim chants. Did I miss something?

When did she turn.

She wasn’t a Face last week… though I did like her slight jab at the Evening Gown Match.

She hasn’t done anything to turn yet, aside from a couple minor altercations with The Beautiful People. I hate Turns, I really do.

Specially Face turns. It’s like Bully just coming out and being the good-guy getting the Fans chanting, he’s spent years and years making them hate his guts. Then just one thing and he’s their best friend and people buy into it. It’s stupid. I know it shouldn’t annoy me, but I mean at least make it gradual, don’t just be like a sudden change of heart, and everything is fine again.

Gail wasted no time in calling out The Beautiful People which led to Velvet sneak attacking her and then the match was on.

Velvet put a bag on Gail’s head… and then lost. Pretty much sums it up.

I don’t know. Seems like Angelina has had no time to breath as Champion. She came back, it felt like a big deal, Beautiful People reunion, straight into a feud with Madison, 6 time Knockouts Champ, and now she’s the number two Knockout to Gail Kim’s reputation and fan base. Which means if you’re going to push Gail to this degree, that usually ends with a Title Change. Probably not the first time, but eventually, Gail can’t be dethroned. So Angelina practically means nothing currently.

Kazarian vs. Crazy Steve

So this was The Menagerie’s second appearance. Thankfully I preferred it.

Kaz didn’t have to job, in fact… nothing really happened, but it was borderline okay… not good… and not quite bad, but could easily drop into that category.

Knux at least has more suitable attire. But I think the idea of this faction is for them all to be “different” from each other. And so different that they can’t actually act together, and everything is a mess. Least that’s what I took away from it… and if that’s the case, then I’m on board. I am actually more suited to the idea that Rob Terry has no idea what he’s doing and it’s stupid, rather than me trying to take him seriously, because seriously TNA, I’ve seen him Wrestle, for years, why are you paying this guy?

Anyway.

Kaz eventually just left, Crazy Steve was attacking his Balloons, which on a side note, he did a top rope splash, and missed them, which is rather hilarious.

In the end he pulled down the Ref’s trousers and got a DQ, so least Kaz won?

“The Freak” was on the apron just pulling on the ropes, part of me hoped he’d fall… I’m not ashamed to admit that.

I’m still not sold, but I am curious. In the end though, the first sentence in my notes sums it up best – “I enjoy The Menagerie – Freak just sucks”.

Menagerie T-shirt

We finally saw Austin Aries again, for about a Minute, he just called MVP a phoney then EY jumped on MVP and started attacking him. Austin Aries is the perfect example of why TNA sucks – the Heavyweight Championship picture, is terrible. There’s nothing else, just one shot, your done, next guy. Bobby Roode was the start of something great, the best TNA title run and World Title run I can remember in Wrestling for years, Austin Aries’ rise to the top was perfect, because it was “real”. Aries carried himself because he’s freaking great. Then it just went downhill, and quickly. I think Jeff was fine, then Bully was the start of the irrelevant Champion. The Aces and Eights should have (and I still think were meant to be) more than they were. Bully was crap as the Champ, Sabin was the utter worst, AJ’s run sucked, Magnus sucked, and EY is alright. But let’s be honest how long will it last, and will he get there again…. doubtful.

Austin Aries has been an afterthought for far too long, and he’s capable of being the best on the show, and he’s not. I do think it probably started with the whole “Christy Hemme” thing in some ways. But he should probably get out, and should easily be put to the test in GFW.

Either way, EY and MVP tore it up, but MVP soon got the upper hand by trapping EY’s arm in a chair and stamping on it. In the end after EY was beaten down, MVP agreed to EY’s original wish of defending the World Championship each week, and EY vs. MVP in the Main Event was created.

Mr. Anderson vs. James Storm

I don’t know what it is about TNA, but they make the mid-card so predictable, and easy to fall into, and fall further down out of, with dumb stories and silly reasons to feud.

Anderson and Storm is a good example of this, despite the fact that I think they are capable of having some good matches.

The thing that stood out the most though, was that Anderson once again seems bored. I don’t blame him. He must be sick to death of his gimmick, I am. Does he need to do it all the time?

I’ve said it before, but he was finally “going somewhere” when he was in the Aces and Eights, turning him Face, letting him feud with Bully, in a very personal, violent feud, it could have paid off. It didn’t, instead they turned Bully baby face and now Anderson is nowhere again.

What I find interesting the most about this pairing, is that Storm is obviously a true – through and through American born and bred guy. Yet Anderson’s new attire is showing a patriotic side to him, I never knew existed. Could be why they went with “Kennedy” back in the WWE rather than Anderson.

I do think the whole American Revolution is at the forefront of its popularity currently, and Anderson wears the Snake logo’s and Don’t Tread on Me / Join or Die slogans with pride. It’s a weird thing to associate with Anderson, but I like it.

So these two being strong American enthusiasts from totally different environments, is a more interesting clash, than Storm accidently kicked him.

Storm grabbed his Beer bottle, took a Swig, then attempted to smash it over Anderson’s head. Instead Anderson caught him, the Ref grabbed the Bottle and Storm spat beer in Anderson’s face from the distraction, dropped him with the Last Call Superkick and won. – If only it ended there…

DTOMvsHILLBILLY

America’s Finest, in a battle of the greats!

An interesting and somewhat unexpected part of the show was a trip to Visit Samuel Shaw in his Straight Jacket, calling for Christy. He had a guest – Gunner. I don’t know why Gunner went to see him, but I do find it interesting to find out. I still think it would have been cooler if Anderson ended up being committed, and it changing who he was. I suppose Gunner with his strict Army background is probably a safe match for Shaw to balance himself out against. Who knows… it’s Wrestling.

DJZ vs. Tigre Uno vs. Sanada – X-Division Championship

I’m starting to think that when Sanada is done with TNA, probably after feuding with The Great Muta, is still my prediction. It seems Zema is going to be the one taking the X-Division gold. Now of course that doesn’t mean he will cashing it in. Hell, Sanada might cash it in, and get screwed out of it by The Great Muta. Either EY remains champ and Kenny King tries to grab the X-Division title, maybe losing it to Austin Aries is my hope. Or, MVP is the champ, and Aries cashes in. I just want Aries back in the main events.

Either way, this was a good match, and you wouldn’t expect any less. I suppose my original point is this, despite DJZ’s push in the division and Sanada’s exposure, it was Tigre Uno once again who stood out as the best. Which is disappointing, because I honestly feel he probably won’t get a look in anytime soon for the Championship.

Should I mention it’s funny that Uno lost a “Best of 3” series… and then gets another Title Shot. Good booking, stuff like that kind of bugs me a little.

Anywho, Sanada picked up the win from his Tiger Suplex on DJZ and retained his Championship.

A running theme this week, much like last, was Bully Ray going after Dixie. This time Dixie was arriving home with Spud and a Cameraman and Bully had numerous Tables set up outside her home reading “Dixie Fears Bully”. Spud and the Cameraman went in the house to find him. In the end though it was Bully and Dixie face to face, with him wanting Dixie to admit that she fears him. Which is when EC3 attacked Bully from behind. So we know where this is going next. Still, I enjoy these segments currently. Though I do wish to have Dixie address MVP on TV.

Eric Young vs. MVP – World Heavyweight Championship

There wasn’t really much of a match here. Obviously the idea was these two battling for the Championship at Slammiversary, but it had been brought forward.

I’ll just get to the good stuff, Kenny King got involved and caused a DQ. Which does seem a little bit silly. Surely MVP would have wanted to Win the belt there and then? He didn’t seem so phased. The Ref refused to restart the match. This just left MVP and King beating up on EY when Bobby Lashley ran to the ring. Which pretty much paints the picture itself. So Lashley joins in attacking EY, leaving MVP, King and Lashley united.

So a few more Heel Turns, and another stable. But I do like the power angle, and is it offensive to point out they are all black? I’m sure that’s a part of the idea. Something I really like, it’s a good Nation of Domination.

Shame I forget Lashley is on the roster every week. Still, I look forward to seeing where this might go.

A few lose ends it might seem, but it could also look like they’ve been planning this for a while, which would throughout the whole TNA copying WWE thing.. which I still think is blatantly obvious.

Regardless, you have got me back on board… a little. Now run with it!

Till then,

Dan Wilkinson

www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

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