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Monday Night Raw #1058: September 2, 2013!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw

Monday Night Raw #1058: September 2, 2013!!!

I’m feeling like the world’s against me Lord Call me crazy, but strangely I love the odds….

They gunning for me, wanna see me fall You know my story, I’ve been through it all Night’s I’ve felt like dying, but I ain’t crying What didn’t kill me, made me strong as iron….

That’s the story of Daniel Bryan against the new corporation led by the evil TRIPLE TEEF… F**K the bullsh!t, you gotta go out chair swinging!!!!

Pringles in hand, Ginger Nuts, chocolate cake, KA Pineapple soda… that’s how I roll!!! RAW #1058!!! HOLD DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZIs this how we gonna start the show every week Triple? Just like how you did back in the McMahon-Helmsley regime? Is that how it goes down in the streets???

While I do agree with Randall saying that Danielson doesn’t have a chance in hell against him, yeah that’s because Randall you have the Shield backing you and the McMahons backing you…. yuh too TEEEEEEEEF!!!!

What I do like, is that the more Randall and Triple talk sh!t on the microphone that Danielson can’t do sh!t… the more the crowd get behind the beard and get Danielson to bring the ruckus!!!!

But has Triple hit the bullseye here? Triple tells Big Show he can’t do sh!t… and if he does he will be at the jobcentre trying to get that Christmas job at Royal Mail, but the twist is – Big Show has an Iron Clad contract!!!! Is that the dude Danielson should really be angry about???? Haha Triple wuk brain on Danielson! Now the two must fight in the main event!!! So there you go IWC! that answers your question about the Iron Clad factor! Some of you think he might turn evil against Bryan as well!!! Imagine that!!!!

OH SNAP!!! Because Cody Rhodes thought that Danielson Vs Randall was good for business… Triple TEEF thought well… ok you’re entitled to your opinion because after all you are an @$$hole, you’re getting married very soon, you can fight Randall, you lose, you lose your job, you lose your fiancé… how you gonna pay for your wedding??? You lose your mind, and you will be also checking for Royal Mail for that Christmas job!!!


Yo Miz – if you’re fighting Fandumbgay, how you gonna come out without Rosa Mendes???? Are you mad boy???? You lucky you won that muthaf***a…

Don’t think that Booker-T’s wise words of wisdom are getting through to Danielson… when is the last time we saw dude??? Yo the plot thickens big time! But I don’t blame Danielson! You have to fight the powers that be! MLK had that speech just over 50 years ago… it applies to Danielson too!

Booker-T I hear ya but FIX UP!!! 400 years plus of slavery rude boy!!!!

BIG UPS TO DEAN AMBROSE!!!! Brukk up that pink vest & panty wearing fool!!!! I’m loving this more and more and more!!! That’s it Ryback! PICK UP THE PIECES!!!


OH SNAP!!! Did Stephanie just say to Big Show that giants don’t live that long???? First they bring out Doink The Clown in a promo (R.I.P.) They have Booker-T talk all this sh!t going against everything Malcolm X and MLK ever said, now this???? Right that does it… I never thought I would do this in a blog, but it has to be done…

What the f**k is going on I can’t go to sleep, They keep giving beats to Danielson I can’t go to sleep, They told Big Show he’s gonna die it’s hard to go to sleep, There are no true heroes I couldn’t go to sleep….!!!

Hold up – EDGE coming on RAW next week???? What can he do??? He got more words of wisdom for Daniel Bryan too? Well how about that for someone who claims he doesn’t miss the business???

I don’t think even Jericho or the Undertaker have been so cryptic in their promos like the WyattGRANT - BODY - P family, now they on it like – Where’s Kane??? Well all the SMARKS know, yeah that includes me too.. but let’s play along for a hot minute. WHERE HIM DEH??? I hope he’s recreating his sorcery! Oh yeah I forgot the Wyatt family dem mash him up! Y’all want me to follow the buzzards when you failed to put up a simple Raw feed? I’ve been grinding for the STC while you watching a muthaf***!n transfer window??? GETTHEF**KOUTTAHERE!!!! HA! HA! TALK SH!T NOW!

I’ve had a thought, maybe Triple has given Cody Rhodes extra incentive to step his game up and win his match against Randall??? That extra Ruthless Aggression??? If you love your woman THAT MUCH you WILL WIN THE MATCH!!! IT COULD HAPPEN!!!

How ironic, that Rhodes ‘career threatening’ match is against a guy he used to kiss arse to back in the Legacy days!!!! Twitter is blowing up, fans talking about – they will lose their mind if Rhodes loses? He vowed to become World Heavyweight Champion before Sandow!!! It’s almost as emotional as not letting the streak be broken to John Cena! It;s as gripping as Jeff Hardy becoming WWF Champion against Undertaker in 2002! Listen to the crowd! Crowd TUN UP!!!!

OH NO!!!! NO!!!! FOR GOD SAKES NO! I’m not a Cody Rhodes fan…. but to end like this???? Surely there must be a riot brewing in the locker room…. I have but two words to say….


I can’t go to sleep, I can’t close my eyes… They fired Cody and now he’s gonna lose his prize, They got Sandow laughing in front of Cody’s seeds, There’s still no rebel to stand up to Trips and Randy…

CM Punk may claim he’s the best wrestler in the world, but him seh wrestling ain’t what he’s tryna do… now he’s out to f**k up Paul Heyman and Curtis Axel BIG TIME… You say that sort of sh!t in the ring Punk, I EXPECT BLOOD!!!!!

Here comes the girl that the IWC are licking out her pussy all of a sudden… just because AJ put the Total Divas on blast? Good for her she made great points, but watch da ryde… COME ON NAOMI! Er – record skip – the Total Divas just went SHIELD on AJ!!! So much for the #1 Contenders Match!!! I love this wrestling sh!t as much as the next man… actually maybe I don’t… sorry I don’t eat drink sleep this wrestling sh!t!!! I saw what happened to that kid who threw tantrums because The Rock won the WWE Title at the Rumble earlier this year – I don’t wanna become like that! WORD IZ BOND!

This must be Damien Sandow’s grandest day! Triple just fired Rhodes… I bet the monkey is off his back now!!!

WHOA!!!! Now Brie, Nattie, and Trin- oh hang on wrong blog – Naomi will fight AJ for the Divas title at the Night of Champions joint…. if this was one on one, whoever faced AJ would have won… the title, but now…..

Is this how it goes down in the streets now? Every main event – the entire roster comes out? When are these guys gonna grow a backbone and go on strike???? Even the referees had backbone back in the day check it…


Clearly Big Show’s heart ain’t in this sh!t, but he’s gotta decorate the Kitchen Table… uh oh… look what happen now, Triple TEEF has to come out….

The Shield brukk up Danielson again, and Triple & Steph pretty much @$$ raped Big Show into punching Daniel Bryan through school buses… it was the most emotionally painful – PPPPPPPP!!! I’ve had to watch… a locker room full of helpless superstars who can’t even rush the ring…

All because Danielson wouldn’t get in the chair…

I can’t go to sleep… I can’t shut up son….

The power is in your hands…. stop all this crying and be a man….








Powerbomb Pro Wrestling News

The Jobber Blogger #65 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 29/8/13August 31, 2013

The Jobber Blogger #65 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 29/8/13August 31, 2013 by

Jobber Blogger logo2

Saturday Night, I’m High!, Saturday Night, High and Dry!

Yes, Def Leppard lyrics shall start off the opening of the Jobber Blogger #65. Which I would like to call my “Urghh” entry, amongst a whole bunch of “meh” and “flump” issues. “Urghh” because it just seems like such hard work to get myself motivated today. Sure it could be because I went to bed at 4:40am and got up at 11am. Is that enough hours sleep? Math be damned!

Either way, I decided I shall crack on and get this thing written for my mass of fans ready to not click on the link I provide. So in order to get ready I made an extra sweet coffee and prepared myself a lovely DibDab. Now I say prepared, all I did was empty the contents of the sachet into a bowl and smash my face into it tongue at the ready.

But yeah, so the preparation pretty much turned into me eating the DibDab sitting and looking on at the Screen.

Well I’ve finished licking the dish, and I guess it’s time I should get on with the show?

Impact Wrestling Logo




So Tito Ortiz is now sporting a “Punishment” Themed Aces and Eights shirt.

This is relevant because no-one really knew where he was aligned. Yes, he’s with Bully, but did that mean he’s with the Aces and Eights? Apparently so.

It still bugs me that he’s a grown man dressing like a teenage hipster idiot. Should that define his in-ring ability, his character, his personality…. yes, yes it should.

Bully went on a rant about having a Bad Day, I forget most of the details but I’m sure it’s somewhat relevant to only having one DibDab sachet left.

DibDap DudleyDib Dab Dudley – FTW

Bully took it in turn to ask his Club Members just what happened last week, and why did Devon end up losing his job?

Well, in a type of Hot Potato manor, Fuzzy Bish claimed that “Devon didn’t mean that much to me, but he was a Brother to you, and part of the club” well that says a lot about the people Bully surrounds himself with. Couldn’t even answer the question correctly.

Big Beard said “I did my job!”

Crazy Face Wes added “I don’t know what happened”

And finally to finish off a riveting informative investigation Anderson proclaimed “It it, what it is”.

Well, case closed I guess.

Bully however didn’t blink an eye, going back to the well of Devon always being a loser, a co-star and a side-kick. So that’s great, and in turn Bully patched in Tito.

Anderson however was annoyed, due to the lack of a Vote, being a tightly knit group of idiots who keep Bully in power. Either way, the friction between Bully and VP Anderson, not to mention the rest of the club is obviously going in the direction of perhaps Anderson taking over as President and moving on to better things.

It’s the whole Jax / Clay relationship, only without years of story, real emotion… and murder.

You could also make an argument for interesting characters, biker gang that uses bikes and that little thing I forget the phrasing for… I think.. oh yeah that’s right… I don’t care.

Kazarian vs. Jeff Hardy – BFG Series  

Hey everyone it’s “MUST WIN THURSDAY!” except for the part where you get another chance to win next week.

Also, it is bugging me that Jeff is sort of in the top running’s… yet he’s barely being used of late. He just pops up, and it’s like they’re keeping him there just for the fact that if they decide to put Jeff back in the Main Events, least they will get some more merchandise sales and good crowd reactions.

Kazarian has been a big part of the BFG Series from the get go, always being on the show, always having something to do. Kaz is the most under-rated guy on TNA’s roster in my opinion. So it’s sort of irritating to see Jeff jump to the “Final Four.. almost” just because he’s Jeff Hardy.

I still really like Jeff obviously, but it’s like they don’t know how to use him, so he’s just a “ratings draw” and keep him there just in case they need that boost. Whereas Kaz would be a risky, different, unique approach. I don’t expect Kazarian to win big, but if Sabin can, then why the hell not?

Still, they both put on a good match to kick off the show, even if the “Wrestling Logic” of the Figure-Four Leg-Lock didn’t apply. Normally if the hold is reversed the pressure switches to the other guy, aside from in this case, where it made no difference.

Also Jeff was back to his skin-tight ski top again, there is a big difference between that, and his tank top armband look, and his credibility shoots up on the latter. Either way, Jeff took the win and the points and moved up to the Final Four in the BFG Series.

Gail Kim vs. ODB – 2 out of 3 Falls – #1 Contenders Match


It was quite obvious they wanted to move ODB into the position Taryn Terrell would have been in, if she didn’t fall pregnant. Though it does seem strange to have Gail Kim to be the one to put everyone over. I suppose she has been used in the title picture a lot. But still.

Also, it’s nice to see different Match Stipulations for the Knockouts, but part of me always liked the “potential” in 2 out of 3 Falls matches, but the recent ones just seem to be a by the numbers.

Usually the Heel will win the first fall, the Face will struggle, probably pull off an upset really quickly after the first fall, and then wind up winning after building back some momentum, or another quick victory (roll-up).

It makes me think, why doesn’t TNA actually do some type of “BIG MATCH”. Like an Hour Long Iron-Man match. A Falls Count Anywhere that has a big spot, like someone jumping off something really high, or an old fashioned crazy happening in the back.

They could do something with their Wrestlers that was “Must See”. Yet they seem to play it safe these days. I for one would love a really good Match Stipulation, maybe not for Bound for Glory itself, the whole privilege of that is to Wrestle in a traditional Wrestling Match for the Belt. But a rematch shortly after with some kind of Stipulation, that would be good.

Either way, ODB landed on her Knee “badly” and that led to Gail “picking it apart” and applied the dreaded “Texas Shooter” or “Sharp Leaf”… the latter would be better suited.

It’s like the “Tickling Stick” or “Pillow Slam”.

Gail picked up the first fall with a Submission win, ODB was down and injured, and what do you know, she caught Gail with a roll-up from another Submission Attempt and won the second fall. ODB then randomly applied “some sort of Submission???” and won the match. Why is it ODB with an “injured” knee was able to battle a submission longer than Gail Kim who had no “injured limbs” and tapped out pretty much straight after the hold was applied.

Why is it that a 2 out of 3 falls match makes it seem like Wrestlers can win and lose matches much quicker than if it were a normal singles match. It’s like the whole “Battle Royal”, throwing people out of the ring is stupidly easy, half of the time they do it themselves, add the stipulation it’s a Battle Royal, and it’s the most difficult thing in the world. It would be easier to pin them from the “Pillow Slam” than get them anywhere close to the top rope. Why don’t they just throw them over the ropes like they’d normally do, why do they feel the need to try and grope lift them, one leg at a time over the ropes. I know why, but like… logically, it makes no sense.

I like Sense!

So Velvet Sky is back, normally I wouldn’t have even written this down, because you know. She walked around, the Camera man zoomed in on her “Chest Region” and she spoke a load of crap not worth the ink in my pen. But, she was asked about missing the Hardcore Justice tapings, and she said she had an “personal” issue to attend to. But they played on the whole Chris Sabin losing his belt thing.

That’s right, Chris Sabin and Velvet Sky have been dating for many years… yup.

Still, this is either a clever work around for a real problem Velvet had, or this whole “I hope she’s okay” lark that generated online, was just TNA plotting something. It’s interesting, because as much as they make errors, they are rather good at blending some of the lines between Wrestling and the real world… of the internet…. the creepy world.

Samoa Joe, Rampage Jackson and Sting from the Main Event Mafia made their way to the ring. Apparently Magnus had issues making the tapings due to his passport / visa. It’s not that interesting of a story.

Rampage took the time to once again promote his MMA fight, but in a “I’m not going to wait to our fight”, whilst clearly plugging they are going to fight, and also what day it is. So that was convincing.

Sting Woo’d for AJ, not sure when that became a Compliment….

Card Passed

AJ made his way to the ring with his new terrible mix of “Evil Ways” and his old Theme. Surely they could find a better way of mixing the two? Perhaps give him a new theme that plays on both. Perhaps stick to one and not try and find a balance. I was hoping AJ would come out and be more of a “I didn’t do this for you” and still stick to being a Dark type of Character. Instead they went with a “Respectful, Untrusting, Heavily Scripted, Rebelliousness” angle.

Who ever heard of the phrase “don’t put all of your eggs in one basket”.

So AJ was “I don’t trust you!” but “Thank you for your kind words” all at the same time. It was a horrible mash up. Then they made it worse by trying to get AJ to be yet again deliver TNA’s “pipe bomb” moment. AJ had true things to say, he has carried the company, he has been there to pick up after their terrible mistakes, and telling Dixie Carter that he deserves better.

There was a lot of truth in what he had to say, but of course, it just reeked of heavily scripted material, where they tried too hard to make AJ come across as likeable, but in a lonesome, yet poorly treated manor.

At least they didn’t have come out and pretend nothing happened, and just be like his old self. They are at least trying to keep his “Dark” character thing, it’s just a shame they had to change it back so quickly. This is feels so much less natural, than having him just be by himself. Surely AJ could have come out, beaten Devon, and still showed that he didn’t care about the Main Event Mafia, and didn’t need to have his old music back. He could have just been out to get rid of someone from The Aces and Eights, and left it at that.

Card Job



Bobby Roode vs. AJ Styles – BFG Series


I do like that the landscape of the BFG Series has changed from the direction it seemed to be heading. But it would feel so much nicer if it didn’t seem so blatantly obvious they don’t know what is best to do for their biggest PPV.

Personally, AJ Styles (full on Dark Character) vs. Bully Ray would have been great. I like Magnus, I don’t want him to win. I really like that Bobby Roode has come back in full force, I think Roode in the Main Event would be great, but would they put him against Bully? Heel on Heel?

Aries vs. Bully would be great. Hardy vs. Bully would just be because they didn’t know what else to do, but that would be the worst outcome.

AJ and Roode had a great match, AJ’s Moonsault from the Ramp, to Roode’s impressive SpineBuster, but it was AJ who counted into a Pinning Victory and came up just short to make the Final Four.

Last year AJ quickly racked up the points too, but I feel confident AJ will be in the Final Four after next week’s match.



Christopher Daniels vs. Austin Aries – BFG Series


In all honesty, I was surprised that AJ and Roode didn’t have the Main Event. But I do think they are pushing Aries currently, and whereas AJ Styles is going back into semi Face – no idea where he is type of character. Aries is being pushed as the “Lone Wolf” which AJ was before.

I do feel that Aries could win the Series, and he will be my pick if AJ doesn’t pick up the last points next week. Still, Aries and Daniels not only had the best match on the card, but one of the matches I intend to re-watch for my contenders of Match of the Year.

It’s true, Christopher Daniels is a great Wrestler, and since Bad Influence has taken off, and he’s been less serious and “Fallen Angel” like, he has become a fantastic personality on the show too.

He and Aries tore it down, and it just goes to show that put anyone in the ring with Austin Aries, and you will have a fantastic match.

The finish came with Daniels running the Ropes, only to be followed by Aries who lands his devastating Running Drop Kick on Daniels full spring back momentum, and then drops him with the Brain Buster and picks up the Win, putting Aries, Magnus, Roode and Hardy in the Top Four of the BFG Series… so far.

Hulk Hogan made his “long awaited” return to Impact, after some “Bolshoi” story of him being in Meetings for over a Month worth of Television.

Hogan drew a huge reaction and dropped the news of next week’s 12 Man Gauntlet Match for the last 20Points in the BFG Series. It’s a shot for someone else to jump into the Final Four and someone to drop down, or for the current Final Four to move to the top position and pick their No Surrender opponent.

My guess is AJ Styles moves up, Jeff drops out.

Bully Ray then crashes the segment, Hogan throws him some “magical” divorce papers, Brooke gets to leave on a happy ever after note, Bully brings out Tessmacher. Then Hogan says at No Surrender Bully must defend the World Championship against one of The Aces and Eights members.

And then Hogan makes his normal Blunder and announces that next week Bully is defending the Belt against Sting. Which isn’t true… I don’t think.

So this is where we stand, Hogan is getting a lot of Heat on him currently, and though I am a big fan of Hogan, and Bischoff, it does go to say, they have always had a lot of bad rep. People said since day one, get them out of TNA. And with everything that’s happened to TNA of recent, not to mention Hogan and Bischoff sitting back saying what “we would do” to help TNA, they have both apparently had a Creative Input, and not done anything. I think it is time to get rid of Hogan, and Bischoff. And forget bringing in new guys just yet, and focus on re-building what made TNA great. AJ Styles – World Champion, that fixes a lot of things. Get a great Tag-Team Roster going, bring the X-Division front and centre, stock up on the Knockouts, and put on great Wrestling, with daring Television and crazy characters. Forget Gut Check, forget Bootcamp, forget MMA, forget bringing in people for no reason, give the guys who want to build TNA the money they deserve. And fire the people who do very little and would leave if they had a better offer.

Seems fair right?

Till then.


TNR Cover 12

Monday Night Raw #1057: August 26, 2013!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw

Monday Night Raw #1057: August 26, 2013!!!

Welcome back once again to another edition of the Infamous Informer cussing your favourite wrestlers, dreams of f**k!n a WWE diva, and laughing at anything Vincent Kennedy does!! Smack Talk Centre, Cage Amateurs UK, lets say hello to our friends over at Powerbomb Pro Wrestling News! Yes your boy is now down with the team! You know why? Because he makes sh!t happen!!!

OK! Fried Chicken in hand! Me ready for some joke!!! RAW #1057! HOLD DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZI take it that’s Triple’s new music that he’s gonna come out to as a heel C.O.O. then?!!!! BOW DOWN TO THE KING! Haha!!!

So if I kiss up Stephanie and feel her breasts, will I get a spanking new carrier like Randall Orton? I gotta try that! Come here Stephanie let me see you Twerk it baby…. If I spank her Triple might get me a new PS3! F**K That – Get me a PS4 with WWE2K14!!!

NO TRIPLE YOU DON’T SING ‘WISH UPON A STAR’ TO DANIEL BRYAN!!!! That is some funny sh!t!!!! Now Danielson has gotta run the gauntlet to add-on to his punishment for disrespecting Stephanie last week… and if he’s successful, he gets Randall for the WWE title at Night of Champions… THE GRANT SAYS THIS: Danielson, I don’t think you’re gonna make it!!! (BOOOOOOOOO!!!) what do you mean boo??? If the mighty Austin couldn’t run the gauntlet way back when what chance does Danielson get???

NOW HOLD ON A MINUTE PLAYAZ!!! We can’t have Sandow, The Miz, Fandango and Rhodes fighting for no reason??? Let’s make this a TAG TEAM MATCH!!!! Summer Rae is sexy as f**k, but who is the woman dancing with The Miz???? REVEAL YOUR IDENTITY!!!

OH SNAP!!! It’s Rosa Mendes!!!! Sorry my stream isn’t all that great… GOD DAYUUUUUUM!!! I’m sorryGRANT - BODY - P Summer Rae, but Rosa speaks Spanish…. game over love!!!! If I f**k Summer she will scream out passionately, but Rosa speaks Spanish so when she screams ‘Your d!ck is so big n!**@!!!!’ I know which one I’d pick!!!

Oh dear!!!! If I was Curtis Axel, I’d make sure that my wrestling skills are the absolute best, because if he fails to defeat CM Punk, the WWE fans have voted that Paul Heyman must go in the ring and get BUSS ARSE!!!! I know what I would do if I was Punk…. I’d make sure there is plenty steel chairs and kendo sticks and a table underneath the ring! Brukk up Heyman’s blousecup!!!

Lyric of the night by JBL: “If Rihanna & Chris Brown can get back together so can CM Punk & Paul Heyman!” I believe that 100%!!!!! Who thought Austin & McMahon would ever work together after WrestleMania X-SEVEN??? A grand total of NOBODY!

OH SNAP!!!! Axel failed!!!!!! RUN HEYMAN RUN!!! Not even Brock can save you now!!!! HEYMAN YUH GOOSE COOK NOW!

Or maybe not!!!! Axel just punched Punk right in Chicago!!! Dayuuuuum Lita no sweet lovin for you tonight! Look on Heyman’s face when he draws out the handcuffs….. TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!! Axel sends for the kendo stick and this had me in stitches! Paul Heyman smashed it here! ‘I CARED ABOUT YOU’! BLAOW! with the stick! ‘I LOVED YOU!’ BLAOW! ‘I FATHERED YOU!’ BLAOW!!! and since Michael Cole, Lawler & JBL are pu$$!£$ on commentary, I’ll say it in honor of JR… HE BEAT HIM LIKE A GOVERNMENT MULE! FOR GOD SAKES!!! OH COME ON!!! THAT IS ENOUGH!!!

Hey JoJo!!! What’s up girl???? Shame you’re just below my age criteria, come check me in about 5 years!!!

It’s the TOTAL DIVAS REMATCH!!!! I’m glad to see Cameron & Naomi on good terms again… it hurt me to see them fightTotal-Divas like that…

This segment is so LIE!!! Look how many Total Divas there are in the ring, all 7 of em… and you mean to tell me that one gyal (AJ) cusses them all and they all didn’t rush her on stage???? Who wrote this sh!t???? Probably Tyson Kidd… that bwoy is an idiot! He don’t know how to treat a woman right! Next man wanna run up in Natalya’s pum-pum! Tyson is just that – A KIDD!

I don’t understand this… if RVD and Bertie are fighting now, what says the PPV? I’m sorry I’d be throwing stipulations left and right… I hate when WWE do this sh!t!!!

So there you have it… RVD faces ADR, WHC at NOC…. GEDDIT???!!! Come on WWE, drop some Extreme Rules on this sh!t!!!! That’s what RVD is known for! That is that E-C-DUB! FLAVA!!!! Throw a chair at Bertie, drop the Van Daminator Kick – BLAOW!!!

This whole ‘One More Match’ sh!t doesn’t make sense to me, can someone tweet me @MZATheInfamous or send answers on a postcard as to say why Christian is still fighting? Unless he can foresee Randall kicking him in his head?

Oh dear!!!!! Why did you have to do that to Randall’s car? Why did you vandalise his car with YES!!! all over it Danielson???? He didn’t even get to test drive it!!!! Don’t cry like a b!tch Randall… be grateful it was Danielson and not Austin… have you seen what Austin does to people’s cars when he gets bex?

OH SNAP!!! Danielson has done it now!!!! Everyone on the roster are about to bear witness what happens when you f**k around with Randall’s car spraying YES! all over it… and anyone attempts to rush the ring will get fired…. oh dear – Danielson goose cook now!!! But wait!!!! Didn’t Triple used to do that sh!t with HBK back in 2006???


Everytime Zeb Coulter comes out, he makes me f**k!n sick…. trying to say that black people live off welfare and sh!t… I am so glad that Ol’ Dirty Bastard was watching over Titus O’Neill as he buss up those so-called real American bigots… f**k!n racist bastard…

I’m not even gonna try to explain this ‘Sister Abigail’ sh!t… and why should I follow the muthaf***!n buzzards when y’all a bunch of lazy incompetent muthaf***az??? I make sh!t happen! You should be following me!!!! Jazz Kumar you feel me though right!!! So let Mr Wyatt tell the story…

Word up, if you got nothing good to say, best to say nothing at all… and my girl Renée Young tried to get explanations out of Big Show, Dolph Ziggler & The Miz… all three couldn’t say sh!t… yes attitude fans, it’s one of those moments that made you think – that could never run with Austin, Rock and Undertaker… the three of em would speak no matter what! The way Triple Teef is rolling, I can see the entire WWE locker room going on strike… but wait, who would be the logical leader of the rebellion? It would have to be CM Punk! But he’s otherwise pre-occupied! I knew this would happen! Triple TEEF in power… means doomsday for WWE!

HOLY SH!T what a contest between Seth Rollins and Danielson! How often do you see a reverse release superplex off the top ropes???? LAWWWWWWD Seth mash-up surely!!!! But the Shield f**ked up Danielson big time! Did you see the look on Big Show’s face? Dolph Ziggler? Titus O’Neill???? They wanted to f**k up Triple!!! BIG TIME! And they were forced to watch this sh!t go down! All this while Cena & Sheamus are out the game!

…and all because Danielson wouldn’t get in the chair…








The Jobber Blogger #64 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 22/8/13

The Jobber Blogger #64 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 22/8/13

August 26, 2013 by DiVineDiablo


Jobber Blogger logo2

Ahh, the Bank Holiday Monday!… Yup, I have no further things to add to the idea of Bank Holidays. The only “day off” I get is Christmas day, and even then I feel fairly confident they would make me work if given the chance. Though to answer everyone’s biggest question… no I am not working today, but not because it’s a Bank Holiday. Surely this just means the Bankers go on Holiday today and take pockets full of your money that you invested. I am fairly sure that isn’t true, the meaning of Bank Holiday, I don’t even know. But why should I know, it’s a Monday morning, and I’m writing about Wrestling! What more do you need to know then that.

Also last week’s Blog of Jobbering goodness post over on Total Nonstop Rewind ( did better than 95% of the other posts. That goes to Linda once more for being awesome and sharing it out there! Perhaps this week I can claim two readers, and oh yes, be prepared with your hand in front of your face for some good old Face Palming!

Impact Wrestling Logo

TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 22/8/13 – Hardcore Justice part 2?

Okay, so what exactly is up with this being Hardcore Justice part 2? They didn’t really emphasise that to any huge level, people had no idea it was supposed to be a “Continuation” of the whole Themed PPV – Television Broadcast. But that is just splitting hairs, the real travesty comes with, just what the hell are they doing over in TNA Land?

TNA opened up to Bully Ray, Anderson and Tito Ortiz backstage where Anderson whined about not being best friends with Bully Ray. Well okay, it was pretty much a “I have no idea what you are doing, when did you become friends with Tito”. But it was done in a whiney begging for attention kind of manor. Which led to Bully Ray being the typical “Bad Guy Boss” telling Anderson to mind his business and get on with his job.

This is the problem with The Aces and Eights,… okay so The Problem, the whole thing is a mess! A faction which is built of “Biker” Gang Wrestlers, whose entire purpose was to Invade TNA, get a job, and help Bully win the World Championship and keep it. That is it. Now everyone is running around doing Bully’s bidding, why the hell is Anderson, who has worked so hard over his career to get into the position he is, why is he doing all he can to be Bully Ray’s lap dog, and keep the Championship on him. The whole idea is this tightly knit group of guys who bonded over a common enemy. Why did they need to invade in the first place, it was a yearlong plan, when Bully has had multiple World Championship matches beforehand. Technically if this was a real thing, they could have rigged the match before. Why did he need to Marry Brooke, why did he need to be best friends with Sting. The whole thing is stupid, if it was to gain trust, win the Championship, hold a power position and leverage the Management, then yeah, that’s awesome. But just to win the Title, Bobby Roode used a Beer Bottle, that seemed so much easier than this Faction of non Biker, Biker Gang members. What was a “Cool Factor” is now just Bully Ray and his bunch of bitches, might as well have them shinning his shoes whilst he shouts at them. It’s pathetic.

Bobby Roode, Christopher Daniels and Kazarian the self proclaimed E.G.O (Extraordinary Gentleman’s Organisation) made their way to the ring.

Roode was congratulating Bully Ray on his World Title victory, and his ability to screw the system once more and make a friend. That’s a strange congratulations, but I suppose it could be an untapped “Greeting Card” genre?

Friend Card

Roode is now in Second Place on the Leader Board and not much longer to go before the BFG Series wraps up. However with the Three of them, they are looking to add one more member to their ranks and make their Chances even better of battling it out amongst themselves for a shot at the Bound for Glory Main Event World Championship Match. Roode wants to add Austin Aries to the mix.

This is when James Storm and Gunner crash the segment, and it took me by surprise, I forgot these guys were even in TNA again, let alone they were the Tag Champs. Storm took offensive to Roode claiming Aries can trust him, of course with Roode turning his back on the Cowboy and Winning the Championship.

Storm then proceeded to Punch Roode in the face, and thus an “impromptu” match was born!

Bobby Roode and Kazarian vs. James Storm and Gunner

Christopher Daniels is competing later on, on the card and so he was sent to the back whilst the others fought it out.

I suppose there wasn’t really much to prove here, other than a good old heated fight. But I was thinking once more about the whole Bobby Roode heel Turn, and if that isn’t enough to give Hogan some control in the Creative department, I don’t know what is. They would have just built Bobby Roode made him a face, given him the Title, and that would have been it. The very idea that Roode worked So Hard to make it to the Main Event, and fall short by Angle cheating to win, to then live with the fact he had gained nothing for all of his hard work. But a mere few days later his Tag Team Partner won the Championship on his first try, that right there is awesome character work to send Roode crazy. Then of course Roode learns from his defeat and Cheats to win The Big One and goes on to become TNA’s best World Champion and one of the best World Champions in Wrestling for a long time. People gave Hogan crap for making Roode loose, but he developed Roode to be a huge star with huge potential and a whole locker-room of talent he can fight for a long time.

Well that was an unexpected Rant, but it’s true!

TNA really need to Develop some Tag-Teams, I for one miss Tag-Team Wrestling, it was one of the best things through the 90’s. I miss having Wrestlers wanting to be Tag-Team Wrestlers. Even a few years ago, TNA had a thriving Tag-Team Division that put it much higher than the competition. Now, now they have a mash up for Champs, and two other teams, but neither of them are shown as a team currently or in pursuit of the belts.

Long story short, Storm was setting up Roode for the Last Call Super-kick only to have Roode hide behind Earl Hebner. This is when Kaz ran in with Tag Belt in hand, to get met with a Super-kick from Storm. Roode capitalised on the opportunity and low-blowed Storm, rolling him up and getting the win.

Sonjay Dutt vs. Manik

It appears that Sonjay’s nickname is officially “The Greatest X-Division Wrestler never to be Champion”, I guess really, if he won the belt now, he would lose the only claim to fame he has that’s unique. Might as well fire him now and be done with it.

TNA have officially changed the X-Division Matches back to 1-on-1 for their primary match type. I guess this means they can change it up now and then when they want to. I don’t get why they need to have a “Set” match type. Can’t they just be matches, and a whole range of them?

People think it’s to save money, that they don’t have enough Money to constantly pay other stars to come in and take up a place in the 3-Way matches. Of course it made no sense in the first place. I do still like that they try things to see what works. I get a feeling Manik is going to turn Heel, and become something more of a “Character”, and I think Sonjay might be the chosen victim to do that with.

Dixie Carter recently signed TJ Perkin’s (Manik) to an official TNA Contract. In the video she even talks about how good he has been since putting on the costume. Which is funny, because Hogan called him the Original Suicide. Either way, TJ looks like a kid, but in the Costume, he’s awesome.

Don’t get me wrong, he’s a fantastic Wrestler, it’s just it needs to be one or the other, stop showing him outside of the Mask, or stop him wearing a Mask.

Taz blabbed on about not liking Manik, and not understanding why he needs a Mask. So I am hopeful that the Manik Character will become something much more interesting, and indeed something we don’t really see within the X-Division.

Also Manik won.

Jay Bradley vs. Hernandez vs. Christopher Daniels vs. Joseph Park (w/Eric Young) – Street Fight – BFG Series – 20Points

Just like the Ladder and Tables matches from last week, this Street Fight was to dish out yet another 20Points in the BFG Series.

Roode and Kazarian made their way out to ring-side during the match. But one of the things that really caught my attention was how much Jay Bradley stood out in this match type. He was physical, brutal and entertaining. The Street-Fight (Hardcore) mentality really suited his Style and Character and I for one think that’s something they could showcase.

Austin Aries made his way to the Ring and distracted Hernandez. Daniels picked up on the Distraction as Aries then went around Double High-Fiving Roode and Kazarian. Then he dropped Daniels with a Brain Buster and legged it being chased by EGO.

Bradley then hit Park in the face with some Brass Knucks, but that only proceeded to Bust him open, which of course did the usual, and a Blackhole Slam later, Park had won the 20Points.

Bully Ray made his way to the ring for a Championship Celebration.

There isn’t enough of these… or there are too many of these. Perhaps too many.

Bully took the time to just blab about himself and being World Champion once more, and of course having a friend in Tito Ortiz. Though building off of last week when Bully was “on the phone to Brooke” he called her out to tell the world the truth.

And yes, it was Brooke Tessmacher. So we are now supposed to believe that all along the Phone Calls to “Brooke” were to her. Which is good, because with Brooke Hogan gone from TNA, it means Tess can her name back.

They made out, which was horrible, then she sucked his Wedding ring off of his finger. It was gripping television…..

The best bit was Bully Ray talking about having the “Hot Brooke” with him, Tito Ortiz, and of course his Brother Taz.

Taz Day

Gail Kim vs. ODB

Well last week I talked about how ODB hanging Gail with her Bra looked rather nasty. Well it seems Gail got her own back this week with this:

Gail Kim ODB Drop

Aside from that, I didn’t make any notes. Gail eventually caught ODB with a Crucifix Pin and won the match. Whatever momentum ODB had, Gail has now evened it out. Which my guess would be the two of them square off once more for a Shot at Mickie James at Bound for Glory. Or bring in Velvet… or even Tessmacher come to think of it. Okay, I am going with Tess. I like Tess… even when she is somewhat manly in the face.

The Aces and Eights vs. The Main Event Mafia – Loser gets Fired

Devon, Garret, Knux, Wes and Anderson make up the Aces and Eights, and Anderson made a point to call out their illustrious leader who sat on an office chair of all things a top the stage.

This just made the whole “play up to the leader” thing worse, with Anderson now looking like a spoilt child craving their Mothers attention. Sick of the Aces and Eights now, it’s just wasted potential.

Speaking of a general waste of time, Sting, Samoa Joe, Magnus and Rampage Jackson obviously made up the Mafia. I could care less about the Mafia, they drew big when they were first created. But back then they actually embodied with Main Events, this is the Mid-Card (it’ll do) Mafia. And they suck the life out of the program.

And yes, it gets a lot worse.

AJ Styles makes his way out to the ring. Stands still, then his “Phenomenal” Music plays and he throws off his Jacket and acts all happy and excited with Tenay claiming the old AJ to be back.

This can be summed up with one phrase “WHAT A WASTE”

They spent how long building AJ’s Character, over a year and a half, nearly two years. It all comes into fruition, it’s new, exciting, edgy, and then they’re like, Meh, a few weeks later and just scrap it.

They have obviously scrapped it because they need someone to fill whatever they had planned with Angle. But couldn’t they have just used someone else? AJ was doing so well with his new gimmick, it wasn’t being used to any huge degree, but I had such high hopes for it.

Turning him back, for no reason, it’s just dumb. He’s spent so long talking about being out for himself, and I bet next week he will walk out and just give a crap promo about being wrong. It’s annoying, it’s pathetic, and it really sucked.

Speaking of sucking, The Aces and Eight seem to be on their way out as a Faction, another waste, they could have made a great Aces and Eights Tag-Team, and have them with the belts. it would have given the faction more power and helped define the Tag-Team Division.

Devon had the Television Championship, Bully World Championship. They could have done so much more, now I don’t even know why TNA are bothering to keep Wes, Garret and Knux on their pay-roll.

Rampage Jackson got a little moment to show off what he can do. To say he used to be a Wrestler before going into MMA he was just “alright”.

The match was a bit of a mess, seemingly no-one told Rampage not to just stand there and watch. Sting got a low-blow and nearly lost, but Rampage and Joe just stood outside the ring, leaning on the apron watching.

In the end AJ Styles pinned Devon after the Styles Clash.

I was so hoping AJ would turn on the Mafia, but it seems all hope is lost.

It was such a pathetic waste.

What if Sting just got his Baseball Bat and just Violently attacked Samoa Joe, for example, I mean like really whaled on him and beat him down badly and Joe lost his job. How awesome would that have been. If it was just so unexpected.

The very idea Sting is aligning himself with the idiots that didn’t help him in the first place is dumb. And now after AJ Styles’ quick turn around, I don’t know what I think of TNA currently. I am finding it hard to praise them, they are making a tone of mistakes, and a lot of bad choices, and they need to really change their PR team, and their Creative team. They are the home of “Good Ideas” and utterly crap execution.


TNR Cover 12

Smack Talk Centre -Raw – Monday Night Raw #1056: August 19 2013


What a week in wrestling!!!! HOLY SH!T! Darren Young admits his sexual orientation, Brooke Hogan gets shown the door by TNA, Ric Flair turns up at the WWE2K14 symposium drunk and telling true hollywood stories, and finally Summerslam… Kane gets destroyed and abducted by the Wyatt massive, CM Punk & Brock Lesnar put on a possible contender for match of the year, Natalya wins a match, and is there a reconciliation with Randall & Triple TEEEEEF, and even Vincent Kennedy???


WWF PROPA TINGZIn the words of birthday boy Nate Dogg, OH NO!!! The crowd is ruthless! John Cena just announced he’s gotta leave the game for about 4-6 months… hear the crowd – YES! YES! YES! They can’t say that!!!! That’s not the issue though, Daniel Bryan climbed the top of the mountain, only for Triple TEEF to say – BEAT HIM BACK DOWN!!!

Damn you looking fine Stephanie! But hold on – Danielson got the killer line of the night already – “When you sleep with TRASH, you start to STINK!” Steph is trying to deflect these shots as best she can! She is a boxer after all! But eventually Danielson will break those defences…. Steph rates him at a B+, but Danielson wants to call her the B-word!!!! Rewind back to 1997- 2008 and you can call her that and get away with it! unfortunately his lack of emotional content has him thrown out the joint…. Ok Bryan… LET’S GET DIRTY! And I don’t mean Christina Aguilera!!!


Blodclart I missed the Sandow Vs Cody Rhodes match due to the live stream f**k!n up… no matter I saw it on Summerslam anyway… if it was a divas match I missed I would be real mad and Ziggler would be real DEAD!!!! JOKE ME A RUN! Everyone knows by now I can’t stand the f***a!

And so the ‘Unleashed’ storyline continues! Heyman is prepared to take CM Punk back because Brock mash him up at Summerslam!! You know when Heyman is on the mic he spits fire…. my stream is really on her premenstrual cycle – damn I missed the rest of that segment! And I ain’t checking on unless I really have to… I haven’t got that sort of time right now!

From this point on the resource comes from as the live stream failed completely.

Will CM Punk retrieve the leash and put back round his neck???? I can’t see it happening as long as Randall and Bertie are the main champions…

This is the match that put me over the edge… the stream f**ked up, so did the internet for that matter and I find outGRANT - BODY - P that not only my baby mother Layla was on, but AJ, and the Funkadactyls are on in tag team action! 4 of my favourite ladies – this breaks my heart…. they should never fight! What happened to unity in black women? What happened Queen Latifah???

Not only did I miss the lovely ladies, I missed The Shield brukk up Ziggler???? NOOOOOOOOOO!!! WHHYYYYYYYYYYYY!!! What did I do to deserve this? You see that is TRUE JUSTICE! You know why? Because Darren Young confessed about being gay and is comfortable about it, which is good… personally I’m not a fan of homosexuals, but I respect his honesty and integrity, unlike Ziggler who is LYING to his fans and leading them in the wrong direction… that’s why The Shield mash him up!!!

I feel like celebrating like Danielson right now! The Shield, triple powerbomb Ziggler into the canvas – BLAOW!!!! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! Talk sh!t now Ziggler fans!!!! Ok I admit! I paid The Shield handsomely to f**k up Ziggler! LIFE IS GOOD!!!

Oh dear Sin Cara f**ked up his hand or his wrist in his contest with Bertie, you know why that happened? Because you didn’t have your special lights on!!!! I feel sorry for this kid you know why? He doesn’t seem to get a break, no storylines, he’s just thrown out there. No real feud, nuthin… the IWC gives him a hard time… the kids can’t connect with him like they do Rey… yeah that’s right play the violin behind him…

I don’t blame Bertie for reppin for the Latino community… he makes me so proud! Fat Joe, Jennifer Lopez, Eva Longoria, Roselyn Sanchez and especially Big Pun would be proud of him! But what happened to your eye Bertie??? “Oh it’s cool…”

Bertie likes kicking people in their head, so Ricardo went and found a new cat he can rep for… ROB VAN DAM!!! Apart from the All Japan Pro Wrestling joint, have you ever seen anyone use martial arts better than RVD??? (Insert indy wrestler name here) that should be a great contest come Night of Champions! WWE make it happen Bertie Vs RVD!

I thought it would be a matter of time before that racist Zeb would target my black people… COME ON PRIMETIME PLAYERS!!! IT’S ALL ABOUT THIS BLACK FIST! SHOW THE FAKE AMERICANS ALL ABOUT HIGHER LEARNING!

YES! YES! YES! YES! YES! Now that Darren Young has had his moment of clarity, thus turning the PTP good, the question remains – what does AW think about all this??? I still say Bring Back AW!!! The sh!t he was talking last year, I think would be appropriate now that the storylines have become edgier!

Oh dear one man ain’t happy about Triple Teef – that’s the 7ft2, 500lbs Big Show… he actually said what happened at Summerslam was straight GARBAGE!!! And he’s liable to punch Triple in his mouth!!!! realising that the Sean Price of WWE is out to punch him thru school buses, Triple sends the Shield to brukk up Big Show…the Hounds of Justice can do what they wanna do… that won’t stop Show I can tell you that!

Have you ever wondered what happens when a moaning, whining IWC keyboard warrior finally takes his fat @$$ off the internet, leaves his house and attends a WWE live show, then proceeds to boo CM Punk??? Sorry Danielson, CM Punk just took the quote of the night!!! Instead of me spelling it out, just press play…


Well Heyman wanted an apology from Punk! And he sure as hell got it! Punk says he’s sorry he didn’t get to f**k him up! So what does Heyman do? He sends the weakling Curtis Axel after Punk… you know Wolverine ain’t leaving!!! Claws sheaved, LET’S GO!!!


Hear Heyman as Axel sets up the steel chair on CM Punk’s leg… “BREAK HIS LEGS!!!” See this is where we need JR… where is the over exaggeration? Where is the passion? Thankfully Wolverine’s healing powers enabled him to get out the way of the impact of Axel’s stomp, and the tables are turned! CM Punk beating down the pu$$ybwoy with the chair! Then picks up Axel, GTS on the steel steps – BLAOW!!!! GAME OVER! So much for your new Heyman Guy! Axel is WACK! His father must have turned his back in his grave give his son!

DAMN YOU WYATT!!! What have you done to Kane!!! DAMN YOU!!!! Leave R-Truth alone!!! I have right on my side… you got all the STC fools following you like sheep… not me!!! If you feel like an enemy… COME AFTER ME!!!!

Can you believe that while the sensible people are chanting for the Usos some dickheads are cheering for 3MB??? If you are one of those people… DON’T CHAT TO ME. You clearly have no sense, and you are probably like that same fatso that booed CM Punk, and then run him down at the airport to get autograph so you can sell that sh!t on ebay… maybe that’s what it is! CM Punk recognized that fat fool!!!! It all comes together now!

I was yawning through that Wade Barrett Vs Miz rubbish… thank god Fandango came down and shut that match down! If it means Summer Rae shaking her sexy legs then I’m all for it!!

“WHAT A MOMENTUS OCCASION!!!” And in the end, Triple saw the light!!! HAHA!!! Ok did Triple Teef snatch the quote of the night? “The coal has now become the diamond…” referring to Randall… was that cryptic to the video I put up at the top of the page??? Look at Vincent Kennedy!!! HIS SUIT DOESN’T MATCH!!! That’s the Vincent Kennedy I like – when his suit don’t match! Now, are we witnessing a new corporation here? Danielson tries to rush the ring, but The Shield beat him down as if to say – where ya go bwoy??!!! But Triple tells them to stop… and invites Danielson into the ring… WRONG ANSWER – RKO – BLAOW!!!!

THE GRANT HAS TWO THINGS TO SAY AND HE SAYS THIS: One, you mean to tell me that after all that, Randall kicked Vincent Kennedy in his head, kicked Shane in his head, kissed up Stephanie in front of Triple, and felt her breast, Triple now supports Randall??? All for the sake of business??? And two, why didn’t the entire locker room rush the ring???? Especially the Big Show?? Quick to talk sh!t backstage but can’t use his Sean Price punch???

…and all because he didn’t get in the chair…







The Jobber Blogger #63 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 19/8/13

August 19, 2013 by DiVineDiablo


Jobber Blogger Birthday logo

Well doesn’t this suck, it’s a Monday evening, I am writing this because I just didn’t have the time over the weekend. Sure I watched Impact on Friday, big Whoop, I worked the weekend, and I’m going to get all defensive and complain! And no… I barely worked on Saturday, but does that really make me a complainer? I like to look at it as minimal complaining. After all I am getting this done a day after Impact aired in the UK, so all my UK fans, “Shout out to Linda” Woo! I have a fan! Are up to date and craving… my … random…. wisdom?

So I was talking to my Boss at work, and he questioned the logic behind typing out a Blog for a TV Show, because obviously, you can just watch the show. I don’t want this to be an “Informative Breakdown” of Impact, this isn’t a substitute. Sure I want you to know what happened, but I want to talk about it from my perspective as a Wrestling nut. Not in a literal sense… like:

Wrestling Nut

More of, I’m crazy about Wrestling, just not Brooke Hogan levels of crazy

Brooke Hogan crazy face

never gets old

Praise the lord, she’s been released. Unless this is one of TNA’s “Releases” and she’s going to turn up in a Suicide Costume and become World Champion for a Month. Urghh! I hate being right! Correct that, I love being right! And no, I wasn’t serious about Brooke’s return, but I am entirely serious of her being released.. and indeed praising the lord. So what the hell was I on about. Wrestling.. Blog, my opinions… and you might think to yourself, well Dan, Jobber Blogger, arse face (common nick name for me) “why should we read your opinions?”…. BECAUSE, THAT’S WHY!! NOW SHUT UP AND READ!

Impact Wrestling Logo

TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – Hardcore Justice -15/8/13

I wonder if anyone took my “shut up and read” as offensive, specially with timely use of the words being entirely in Capitols. I don’t know….. I feel this might very well be a proverbial “Good One!”

Good One!

What is it with my Arm pits just dripping whilst I’m typing, I’ve noticed this to be a new trend. Perhaps after a  year of Writing these at least once a week, my typing speed level has increased so much so that the sweat runs from my finger tips and up my arms to then just fall down my side. Also one whole freakin’ year! Where’s my god damn hat! Balloons, party strings? Nothing, even my number one fan who I forced to read “some” of these didn’t even remember the occasion. Hell I only just remembered myself after looking to make sure. 12th August 2012 was the Debut, and what a year it’s been… that about sums it up. I am joking, it’s been awesome and I love writing these, and I’ve finally gained a loyal reader. Yep, just the one. I will however spam this to my Boss, because he’ll get a kick out of it, or something, or deep regret, only time will tell but if I were a betting man, then I’d certainly vote for the latter. And to be honest, I should be a betting man because I would love to make my entire mission for these to fill every reader with “Deep Regret” that’s a Writing talent University’s don’t already run courses for.

So yeah, Impact Wrestling. Jeff Hardy kicked it off by blabbing to the Camera man about how he’s going to win his match and gain some points, sure he did his usual “SCREAM TO GET MY POINT ACROSS” but hey, it’s Wrestling.. it nearly works. Austin Aries then interrupted moaning about how he is sick of Ladder matches. And so it was match time, from that amazingly important and seemingly relevant piece of footage. I wonder who wrote that, and how long it took them,… and for how much. I am only joking, least mostly with a hint of paprika.


Austin Aries vs. Kazarian vs. AJ Styles vs. Jeff Hardy – Ladder Match – BFG Series 20Points

Well it was a great match, but one would expect that regardless, after all its TNA and they put on the best Wrestling out there. Not to mention that all of them involved in this match are at the top of the industry standard, if anything Jeff Hardy looks the weakest amongst them all (aside from Star Power) and that’s saying a lot. But with a match of this magnitude, is it any surprise, that I, being myself, would make the first note of Jeff rubbing his face paint off before the match.

Jeff Wipe Face

It’s more funny because he only put it on mere minutes before he took it back off again. Sure, he was probably going for a “Jesus Towel” type of deal when he lobbed his scruffy rag into the crowd. And yes, Jesus Towel is indeed a thing… and with a quick search to Google to prove my point, I bring you!

Jesus Towel

No idea what I found, it’s half the fun of doing it.

I never understand why I don’t become a Colour Commentator for professional Wrestling, picking up on the little details like Jeff rubbing his face paint off and the fact AJ actually took his shirt off to compete. Is it weird that I notice things like this. Is it more weird that I note them down and proceed to Write about it? Either way, it is somewhat relevant as AJ has Wrestled in his “NO ONE” Shirt since his new character gimmick, and it marks the first time he hasn’t worn it. Also on a fun play with words idea, AJ’s newest shirt shows his immediate distaste for Homosexuals:

A bit on the nose isn’t it?

Still it could be worse… it could be this monstrosity of an idea:


The match packed in some awesome highlights, one of them being Kaz full-on throwing a Ladder at Austin Aries. AJ pulls Aries off of the Ladder and muscles him into the “Styles Clash” only to be caught by Kaz dropping AJ face first also.

But as I expected, Christopher Daniels and Bobby Roode got involved, and it was Daniels’ Apple-Tini to the face of Jeff whilst on the Ladder which led to Kaz picking up the Win and the 20Points in the Series.

What is stupid though is the fact that sure Jeff had liquid in his eyes, but he lay on the floor motionless. He didn’t even sell the fact he couldn’t see. It was like a chair shot to the eyes apparently. I don’t even know if that makes sense.

Kevin Nash had a good rant on Twitter about the ending, but put it this way, the Ending of that match was better than 90% of the entirety of his Wrestling Ability. He does know how to draw in some cash though, but he better be careful about pocketing anymore, case the weight tears his quad again.

Dixie Carter and the Main Event Mafia, of course minus Kurt Angle, and Rampage has finally got a suit, came out to talk to the Impact Audience. They wanted to address the fact that Kurt has entered himself into Rehab after yet again being arrested for drinking under the influence. See, this is the kind of thing I respect TNA for, when they actually come out and say what has happened and address it head on. It gives them respect, everyone knows what happened to Kurt, and obviously everyone wants him to get himself sorted. So it begs the question, when Jeff couldn’t fly abroad because of all of his legal issues, which they themselves documented when Jeff returned, why did they make up some stupid injury angle, when they could have just explained it.

I do wonder if Kurt needs to come back and “work his way back up the ranks and gain respect” like Jeff did. If not, then that’s kind of playing favouritism.

The Aces and Eights crashed the segment with Anderson just talking about the current man-advantage and who MEM are going to recruit for next week’s Tag-Team Match where the loser gets fired. Like any type of promo, they all ended up fighting each other. But with Anderson in a leadership position within the faction, it’s a perfect platform to allow him to be himself, and he Shines at it.


Gail Kim vs. Mickie James vs. ODB – Hardcore Triple Threat

Despite the fact that Mickie is actually trying to play a Heel, and doing it more “creatively” she actually gained 99% of the Audience behind her. That’s the difference with Wrestlers trying to be a good Heel, rather than just doing the “bad guy routine”. As an example, Gail Kim has been doing the bad guy routine since she came back to TNA, always talking about how good she is in this one dimensional mono tone. And of course Gail is awesome, but people don’t care about her current position. I suppose actually, thinking about it, this makes her a better heel,…. because if anything people don’t like it. Or warm to it, like the best Heels, who become fan favourites. I’ve said it before, Bully Ray = best Heel in the business.

Is it bad that the only notes  I made about this match was the above paragraph, the fact that No Surrender is back next Month as a part of a Special Impact PPV TV broadcast, and that Hulk Hogan is off in more meetings again this week. Or at least so they announced. We expect to see Hogan back on TV soon, but no-one really knows where he has been, or what he’s been up to.

So ODB decides to do something a little different and wears two “Undergarments” and proceeds to Ripping one off… with… some kind of result. But what’s more drastic is her “hanging” Gail over the Ropes with it. Of course we’ve seen Wrestlers getting “hung” before, but this looked rather painful:

ODB Hangs Gail Kim

Either way, ODB “the new Taryn Terrell” dropped Gail Kim with the “BAM!” on a Chair and Won. This might have something to do with using Gail to put over ODB and have her take the Championship from Mickie at Bound for Glory. Apparently Taryn was going to get that push, but she is currently out from being Pregnant, and Mickie’s contract is coming up again for negotiations. I certainly hope they keep Mickie signed on, I would hate to see her leave, but seems like they are planning for the “worst case scenario”.

Bully Ray is seen backstage on the phone to who we believe to be “Brooke Hogan”, saying such things as “next week we will tell the world” and mentions their “relationship” and “Love”. So no idea what that means. Obviously next week’s show was Taped right after this one went off the Air. So Brooke wasn’t “released” at that point, but it could be this was used as a way to give her an exit. No idea quite how they are going to handle it, but it was certainly a rather odd thing to include, or at least random.

Sting went to see Austin Aries about joining the Main Event Mafia and trying to eliminate one of The Aces and Eights members next week by replacing Kurt Angle. Aries said no, which is awesome, because it would have really ruined his Character to be buddy buddy with anyone, certainly in a situation where he would risk his Career for someone else’s gain.

This led to Rampage Jackson and Samoa Joe hitting the ring.

If I can say one good thing about Rampage, it would be that I quite like his music.

It was rather obvious from the get-go where this was going. However I didn’t expect him to get the mic and just plead for people to like him “hey, give me a chance here, I’m new”. Should have just gone out there and begged to be loved. It’s a Wrestling crowd, totally different, even to the MMA crowd, despite their similarities. And the biggest thing they have in common is the stubborn nature, so unfortunately people are going to hate an MMA fighter joining TNA as much as the MMA fans would hate Wrestlers going into their world.

So of course Rampage calls out Tito Ortiz, who just looks so dumb dressing the way he does at the age he is at. Either way, Tito and Rampage suck on the mic, and the fact that they spent the entire segment talking about their up and coming “MMA” fight rather than the topic at hand in TNA, says it all. It was all “we’re partners, trained together, MMA this and MMA that” no one cares. I don’t care!

I get it, makes sense… I don’t care though.  Anyway, the whole segment picked up when Tito’s music played once more and everyone did their best “Act Surprise” face when Bully Ray walked out.

You can see the Smile on Bully’s face as he tries not to laugh at the fact he walked out to the Wrong Music. Either way, Bully insulted them both, which was a clear sign that one of them is going to turn “Heel ” and be on Bully’s side…. interesting!

Also watch the segment here:



2Min 21second mark to Bully laughing

Magnus vs. Samoa Joe vs. Anderson vs. Bobby Roode – Four Way Tables Match – BFG Series 20Points

According to Taz a True Champion is made out of “poise”.

And I quote: “calm self-assured dignity, especially in dealing with social situations / a graceful controlled way of standing, moving, or performing an action / a state of hovering or being in suspension / to be balanced or suspended, or place or hold something in balance or suspension / the centimetre-gram-second unit of viscosity equal to one dyne-second per square centimetre” Take your pick.

Magnus and Joe play favourites as they help one another out during the match, surely that’s an unfair booking. But hey, when the good guys do it, it’s totally fine.

Joe also uses the Ring-Bell and places it over the groin of Bobby Roode and proceeds to ring it with a Hammer.

But in the end, it’s Kazarian who throws Daniels’ Apple-Tini in the face of Magnus and Roode Power-bombs him through a Table, picking up 20Points and becoming Second on the Leader Board.

Roode This Guy

Bully Ray vs. Chris Sabin – Steel Cage – World Heavyweight Championship

Before the match, Bully and Anderson had a heated promo backstage showing Friction between the President and VP of The Aces and Eights faction. It’s a strong promo, but what more would you expect from two of the best.

And on the flip side Sting was asked what he thought of Tito Ortiz joining the Main Event Mafia, to which he replied “Tito is going to be an asset wherever he goes, but will he be to the Main Event Mafia?”…. Well surely is he’s going to be an asset wherever he goes… then yes! Ughh! I’m not really that annoyed, I just like to make fun…

See this, it's my hand

So Bully had the crowd on his side, again, not surprising, best Heel in the business. Despite the fact that what he did to Sting did actually get you to hate him… least during the match and slightly the week after. Then Sting went and formed a crap faction and now I don’t care anymore.

Bully felt like Bully again, yelling at the top of his lungs to Sabin “I’m going to Smash your Face in, and Take your Title!”

I love it when Bully is just allowed to be Bully, I don’t like it when he runs from fights, I want him to the be the bad guy that gets in your face and doesn’t back down. I want him to be that level of ruthlessness. Though this is rather funny:

Last week I said that I just wanted to see Bully completely man-handle Sabin, and sure Sabin can put up a fight, but I wanted to see Bully just beat him down and beat him up. And for the best part, that’s actually what happened. Bully was throwing Sabin into the cage repeatedly in all sorts of powerful, painful ways.

Sabin did have some impressive offense himself, after Bully challenged Sabin to hit him in the face, Sabin delivered a good few Forearm hits, and ripped off his Cut and even dropped him with an impressive Death Valley Driver. Sabin then proceeds to use Bully’s Cut as a Whip.

There was a slight “botch” it seemed when Sabin went for a Hurricanrana from the Top Rope, but Bully caught him, trying to Power him back up, but then both Fell awkwardly. This however was followed with Bully rolling on the floor, holding onto his shoulder and screaming.

Either way, the ending of the match came with Bully lifting Sabin onto his shoulder and “accidently” knocking the Ref down, this was then further enhanced when Bully “accidently” sandwiched the Ref against the Cage. Sabin dropped Bully and went for a pin count, but no Ref. So Sabin went to leave the Cage via the door when Anderson turned up and violently smashed the Door into Sabin.

Anderson you shall not pass

Rampage Jackson and Tito Ortiz made their way to the Ring, Rampage through Anderson off the Ramp to the Floor. Which is when Tito hits Rampage in the head with a Hammer he had concealed, and Bully played off of the distraction dropping Sabin with a Power-Bomb and stacked him up for the Win.

So glad to see the World Title back on Bully, this seemingly was the plan all along, to have Bully retain the Belt to Bound for Glory. I strongly feel with the return of Sabin, and the chance to boost the ratings, they threw in the whole “Destination X” idea. I actually think that is what happened last year with Aries, and that Roode and Storm were meant to main event BFG. But it worked out fine in the end, and everything is back to normal now with Bully having his World Championship back.

This might also mean that I can perhaps go back to liking Sabin again…. perhaps. Time will tell.

All in all though, this was a solid Show from top to bottom. The ratings grew in America with it being another “Themed” TV “PPV” so it’s no surprise that No Surrender is coming up next month.

I always felt that Rampage was going to be the one to turn and join the Aces and Eights, but perhaps with Angle’s untimely trip to Rehab, they had to scratch that plan, maybe it’s why Rampage finally has a Suit too.

Be interesting to see where Tito fits in, though I don’t really “care” that he’s in TNA, I’m not sold it’s a good move yet. This might make some much needed steps in proving me wrong.

Stay tuned for next week!

Till Then!


TNR Cover 12

The Jobber Blogger #62 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 8/8/13

The Jobber Blogger TNA And The Infamous Informer WWE

August 12, 2013 by DiVineDiablo

Jobber Blogger logo2

Well well well, if it isn’t some crazy Wrestling fans, for some reason Reading my ramblings of the latest edition of Impact Wrestling.

I do often wonder if I didn’t write about this in such a derogative tone that more people might read it? Of course that doesn’t make any logical sense, because if people don’t least attempt to read it in the first place, then they wouldn’t know how derogative it is. Also for what it’s worth, I happen to think my Writing is Superb!

Ahh, so egotistical ramblings are more likely to put people off than me just saying negative comments. Don’t you hate it when you’re typing and you just see this Sea of Red spelling corrections, it’s like why do you even bother to try and learn to spell. Because is why!

Okay, so this might be a little late, I would apologise, but I don’t believe in the word Sorry or the actions of which an apology is presented. I will however explain that The Jobber Blogger has been on the Travels, and as much as I would like to tell you it was a Wrestling Related trip, with interviews and career building meetings, it was in fact just a trip to the seaside.

Speaking of just a trip to the Seaside, Impact offers up “Just an episode”… nothing special, but it does have a few highlights that make my Fingers like Danger to Spider-man! Oh Yes! I can use this material!

Game On OddFather

Impact Wrestling Logo


Part of me actually likes the Direction of Taz of late, of course nothing actually explains where he was the last few weeks. But all we know is that he was somewhere and last week Hogan was so annoyed at him, he didn’t let him in the building. A whole week later, he’s fine with Taz returning to duty. Though of course, perhaps he didn’t have a choice, because Taz just called the shots. Which is good, it’s the first time in a long time that Taz has been relevant to what is happening, even his “Heel Turn” to the Aces and Eights wasn’t capitalised on.

Impact opened to Taz, Bully and Anderson intimidating Mike Tenay, with Taz telling him to get out of the way and he is going to show him how a Real Announcer works.

Bully Ray, Taz and Anderson from The Aces and Eights kick off the show, with Taz and Anderson making their way to the Announce Table, and Bully yelling over Taz’s queue to actually talk to JB. It was a whole mess of bad timing and pleasant banter! Pleasant in the sense of it being entertaining, the banter was actually a mixture of violent threats and possible sexual insinuations.

Bully took the opportunity to explain why he was in such a bad mood, Number One, Tito Ortiz, well what a coincidence, it seems Tito put every Wrestling fan in a Bad Mood just by turning up. What a great way to kick off a career in Professional Wrestling “let down from the first second” it should be his Slogan. For some reason Bully referred to him as Blondie? I’m not sure if he’s something I’m not… but the guy looks pretty bald to me.

One of the other reasons Bully is so pissed off, is Chris Sabin, and again, I whole heartedly agree, Sabin is annoying the hell out of me. Some people just aren’t meant to be Champion. I fully feel this was a “X-Division / Spike the Ratings / Comeback Hype” move that they squeezed in for some much needed Viewership Numbers. I could be entirely wrong…. I really hope I’m not.

For someone who gets called “Kid, Boy” and other insulting slang because he’s Small, and he uses that as his “Motivation” to battle against the big guys, the “Bully’s”. Well Sabin contradicts that very attitude when his attitude is so annoyingly childish. “Bully, you’re so full of crap, you’re eyes are brown and you’re breath smells”. Really? That’s our World Heavyweight Champion?

Sabin poo Bully

Next he will be sticking notes to your back and running off giggling.

Not to mention his ability to just blow so much Hot Air he diminishes his own credibility is astounding to watch. My God, does he represent the typical “By the Numbers Promo” he just has a Mono Tone and rambles off the good ol Check List of points, “I can beat you, I believe in myself, I will beat you again in our next match”.

This is why Bully is so good, he’s much better when you’re not tying him into stupid “realism” story lines, like being Married to Brooke, but when you let Bully be Bully, you believe what he is saying. He doesn’t just rattle out a loud of Scripted “points” he will be a Character, he has a Personality. The very fact Sabin’s whole run of being Champion is him literally Thanking the Main Event Mafia, because he WOULDNT HAVE WON otherwise. His credibility is based on him cheating to win, with the help of 5 other guys, because on his own, he got his Ass Kicked. He prides himself on that logic. That’s terrible…. beyond terrible. For everything he supposedly strives to prove himself against and over, he diminishes it all by openly telling everyone he wouldn’t have got it done by himself.

Well, least they didn’t have a “Sit by a Desk” type of Contract Signing, and Brooke Hogan simply Quoted an e-mail from Hulk. Either way, Bully didn’t read his contract when he fought Chris Sabin, as Bully apparently signed a Contract that if he cashes in his Rematch Clause, and looses, he will never Wrestle for the World Championship again. Now yes, he has the whole “Aces and Eights” thing that would force management to write in a clause like this. But, on the flip side, Bully didn’t need to fight Sabin, and or want to, Sabin is the one who took the gamble to fight him, so surely it should have been Sabin with everything to lose, and everything to gain. Not everything to gain, nothing to lose and Bully lucks out regardless of what happens. Not to mention Hogan could of fired him, or stripped the belt from him, or booked him in many, many Championship matches, but he didn’t, he didn’t do a damn thing. So whose fault is that.

The only upside is that means chances are the belt will go back to Bully. I honestly would love Bully to win cleanly, by just beating the hell out of Sabin in a brutal match, sure have Sabin put up a fight, more of a fight than he did when he won the belt. But to actually have Bully win, because he is big, tough, intimidating, and World Championship material. Though I would gladly settle for anything that puts the belt back on Bully.

Jeff Hardy vs. Samoa Joe – BFG Series

 In the first of the “Audience” Voted BFG Match Up’s, Jeff and Joe battle it out, with Anderson still on Commentary.

It really is building to the point that I don’t care about this Faction war anymore, but I hate The Main Event Mafia… a lot. And with Taz stepping up, not to mention Anderson’s new role in the Club, I am starting to just see more and more opportunities for The Aces and Eights to be a bigger force than they are.

If Joe wasn’t in the MEM, then I really do wonder where he would be in this whole Series. Jeff is probably one of the top paid and top Superstars on the Roster, yet it feels like they have nothing for him of late. I highly doubt he will win the series, so I don’t think he will be jumping into the Main Events again for a while. Which either means he will get back into the Aces and Eights feud, or he will just find some random grudge. And hopefully something that is better than Kurt Angles “I don’t like the fact my son puts socks on his arms” motivation of a few years back.

The match came to a close with Anderson simply standing up, Joe looking at him, and Jeff rolling up Joe for the win. It’s a wonder Joe made it to the Second on the leader board really.

 Magnus vs. Anderson – BFG Series

It’s strange, but Anderson never really draws out much “Awesome” from his actual in-ring efforts. Well aside from when he did the Senton Dive and completely missed.


I kind of find the same can be said about Magnus, yes they’re both good. But Anderson is most entertaining in the ring when he can be an idiot, and that’s better presented when he has more of a “Storyline” going outside of the ring, where he can ramble on the mic and do his little gestures.

Magnus on the other hand is impressive in the ring, but he’s not exactly a Bobby Roode or Austin Aries, AJ Styles, etc etc.

Though Anderson did throw himself out of the ring head first into the Announce table, which was a highlight. And of course Magnus’ collision with the Ring-Steps which put a big mark on his back. But the best part about this match up, was Bobby Roode’s involvement.

Roode randomly attacked Anderson with a Chair, which caused Magnus to be Disqualified. Of course that also means that the rule book of the Bound for Glory series is a little stupid. Surely there is a limit of how much you can get other people DQ’d, rather than doing something yourself as a competitor to cause the disqualification.

But with Roode’s involvement, Magnus drops 10Points in the series.

So the part everyone was looking forward to, right? Tito Ortiz – the “Huntington Beach Bad Boy” well… he doesn’t look like a Bad Boy anymore?

Tito bad boy

Hey, I’m not judging, I’m sure he’s awesome at what he does. But he does is not what TNA offers. And all of those whom love Tito and have followed his work, well guess what… I said it last week, and I’ll say it again, that’s not this audience.

In what was a good move, they didn’t let Tito actually say anything, and no that’s because of “building the hype” it’s because I’m sure he’d suck on the mic. So instead we get a repeat, almost exactly, with Kurt Angle coming out to get in the face of Tito.

Angle takes this time to blab on about how this is his Ring, and that Tito must respect that and get out of his way. Okay, so when Rampage Jackson signed, he’s a hot talent in MMA, he’s been in the new A-Team Movie, it made headline news, he goes face to face with Kurt Angle, it was exciting, if not a little irrelevant. Everything that was good about that encounter turned to crap when they made Rampage a follower of the Main Event Mafia. I just hope they actually let him turn on them, that could be interesting, currently, I couldn’t care less.

So why exactly bring in Tito Ortiz, to do the exact same thing once again, if they are going to continually bring in MMA guys, from the looks of it, Kurt Angle is the only guy they are going to use. Which means this is going to get continuously boring, not to mention completely un-needed.

Angle Shades 3

Bro Mans and Mickie James vs. James Storm, Gunner and ODB

Earlier on in the night Robbie E and Jesse talked about Bro’s before Hoe’s and that’s why they ditched Tara. At least she got a nice send off from the company huh?

The bigger news is that I completely forgot about the Tag-Team division, more to the point completely forgot about Storm and Gunner. Why is it we only have two Tag-Teams in the company, and that they’ve been “feuding” on the house shows, who knew this was still going on. Yet they wasted all of this air time on Tito Ortiz, think of the awesome Tag-Teams they could have brought in with that money.

There isn’t much to say about the match, only then that the ending was good, Storm landed one hell of a cool looking Last Call Super-kick to Jesse. Storm and Gunner then hit their “Double Team” move and took the win.

This is when Gail Kim got involved and attacked ODB, so I do expect them to square off at Hardcore Justice, for the hell of it.

Kazarian vs. Christopher Daniels – BFG Series

I did actually kind of resent the fact that they actually tried to build tension between these two going into this match. Though I thought they would come out of it just as much of a Team as they did going in. They had a little bit of a back and forth battle, before they both just climbed out of the ring and counted to 10, and celebrated the Double Count-Out which I believe gives them at least 1 point.

Bobby Roode then made yet another surprise appearance he brings Kazarian and Daniels in the ring with him as he talks about landscape of TNA with The Aces and Eights and Main Event Mafia, and there being strength in numbers. Which looks as if they have formed an alliance, promising one of those three will win. It will be nice to see either Aries join with them, or for Aries to break off completely and go on his own.

Bully Ray and Devon vs. Chris Sabin and Kurt Angle

Yes, I wrote down Sting to begin with, but they played the old double switch a roo, thing. Sting distracted them as Angle attacked from behind. Funny because of that was reversed and The Aces and Eights did it, they would get complained at.

The funnier thing is the mere sight of Sting and Sabin side by side, it just makes Sabin look even more inferior…. and I like Sabin… that’s how much he annoys me!

It’s been a while since we’ve really seen Devon do anything, and it’s another wasted opportunity, because he really suits the Aces and Eights attire and general theme of the faction. Not to mention he can get it done in the ring and is capable of being a force behind the scenes too.

Obviously this episode of Impact was taped before Angle went out Celebrating and got arrested… again…. again for Drink Driving. He has since decided to enter himself into Rehab, which means next week will be interesting. I actually hope Angle does the match and is in fact the one Pinned and “forced to leave TNA”. I honestly don’t see a better option, Angle has created a great storyline exit for himself.

Bully Hip-Tosses Sabin over the ropes to the Steel Ramp, Angle get’s the 3D, Bully then throws himself through a Table (as you do) and Sabin lands a Top-Rope Cross-Body and picks up the win.

I still think the fact Sabin can pin Bully, is dumb, specially with a Cross-Body, either way, it gives the edge to Sabin next week. But I really hope Bully tears him apart.

With the success of Destination-X being a free on TV PPV, Hardcore Justice next week should be great. Not to mention it actually has more going on than just a Main Event.

Till then!


TNR Cover 12


Smack Talk Centre Raw – Monday Night Raw #1055: August 12 2013



Smack Talk Centre-Raw

Monday Night Raw #1055: August 12, 2013!!!

YO! YO! Put your f**k!n fingaz up, muthaf***az! Coz if you don’t give a f**k like we don’t give a f**k PUT YOUR MUTHAF**K!N FINGAZ IN THE AIR!!!

OFFICIAL Smack Talk Centre Summerslam Theme Song: Ja Rule & The Murderers – ‘We Don’t Give a F**K’

This is how it goes down! Once friends now enemies fighting over a leather briefcase! NXT Sistrins now NXT Nemesis team up with their respective men to go at it tag team style! Someone is gonna get BURNT! Can David bring down Goliath? Will the IWC go YES! YES! YES! or NO! NO! NO! and make angry YouTube videos forgetting to wash themself first?

It’s the RAW before SUMMERSLAM!!!! #1055! HOLD DAT – BLAOW!!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZBefore I go in, I just wanna say that Total divas on E! is THE MOVE! Ssssssssshhhh! Don’t tell the wrestling purists! They will get mad if you watched Total Divas over G1 CLIMAX this past weekend! F**K THAT – IT’S ABOUT A WOMAN’S WORTH! I don’t watch wrestling 24-7 jabroni!!!

I should have known that if Brad Maddox is the referee, something was gonna go down with the Wack Barrett Vs Danielson match…. Danielson missed the YES Kick, Barrett rolls up the kid, and the scrawny Maddox used a fast count!!!! TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF! Look at the sissy Maddox reminding Danielson that he can shut down the main event if Danielson does something rash… I would have f**ked him up same way, because I know Triple would rectify the situation right! GM or no GM, Danielson you should have kicked him down! You think Austin would have thought twice? it would be an instant STUNNER!!!

I wanna big up Cody Rhodes… you know why? He threw that stupid fisher price My First Briefcase in the drink a few weeks ago, and now Sandow get himself a nice sensible leather briefcase! Very good Cody! I still hope Sandow f**ks you up at Summerslam! Don’t expect much praise from me!

Interesting… Cody Rhodes claims that Sandow WILL NOT become the World Heavyweight Champion before he does…. WELL THE GRANT SAYS you might be right… but the moment you’re champion and you just had a gruelling match, who do you think would cash in his cheque against you??? You wanna think about that!

Why is there all this talk about Sandow & Randall cashing their cheque at Summerslam? I can sorta understand in the case of Randall… but let me tell you NOW: They are NOT gonna cash in!!! It’s what everyone expects! F**K THAT! Come check me next week and know that I’m right!

Big ups to Dean Ambrose!!! He just said that if the ghost of André The Giant is not in the Battle Royal then NO ONE STC Summerslam 2013CAN BEAT HIM for the US Title!!!  Now the rest of the Summerslam card is getting put together!

Wack theme song that WWE has chosen…. some bullsh!t @$$ tune by 2Chainz? We don’t do that over here THIS IS THE STC! Cage Amateurs UK! THIS IS HIP HOP! (Just check the tune above, top of the blog!

Yo CM Punk, I asked you before, I’ll ask you again… did you just quote another hip hop quotable? “You come at the King, you best not miss…”???? Sorry readers you don’t follow…. observe…

Big ups to Big E Langston! He said what I’ve said all along…Ziggler needed him to win his matches… Langston didn’t need Ziggler at all! YES! That’s the SISSY you support! Some of you have sons, and you are telling your sons that a wrestler wearing pink brief and whines himself and ‘twerks it’ is OK????? WAKE THE F**K UP MUTHAF***AZ!!!

SHOCK! HORROR!!!! Natalya defeated AJ! No need to go to specsavers – YOU SAW RIGHT!!! Natalya won a match!!! Natalya for women’s champion STRAIGHT AWAY!!!

UH OH!!! Somebody’s in trouble…trrrrouble… TRRROUBLE!!! Brad Maddox must answer to Vincent Kennedy!!! He could be fired right now!!!

Now he wants to be the ref for Cena Vs Danielson at Summerslam????? TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!!

GRANT - BODY - P…and just as Vincent Kennedy was about to appoint the Sissy Maddox guest referee, Triple puts a stop to that ONE TIME! Now Triple Teef is the guest referee!!!! Right you unwashed IWC idiots, I hear you saying ‘Overkill’ on the main event, why don’t you shut the f**k up for a minute… Triple claims he’s got everything on lock, I’m not so sure! Last time I check, Triple was the ref for the John Cena Vs CM Punk match two years ago, and what happened? Kevin Nash f**ked it up for CM Punk!!! Just reminding you… IT’S WHAT I DO!!!

That’s it Kane! Out-think the Wyatt massive! I see you rude boy! Using an Undertaker mind game! Disappear out the ring and appear at the other side!!! Drop the FYRE on em!!! the fire is the purification!!! But yo! Bray Wyatt is loving everything!!! This Ring of Fire/Inferno match is gonna be MAAAAAAAAD!!!!

You know what’s even better at Summerslam? 2 Divas matches!!!! Brie Bella and Natalya catch up!!! Natalya gave the b!tch slap last week – Brie turns the other cheek! She’s only doing what was written in the good book! Brie is bringing her girls – Nikki and that troublesome red-head Eva Marie, Natalya bringing my favourite Nubians – Cameron & Naomi! YEAAAH BOYEEEEE! You jabronies hit the bathroom at that time – give me a bucket of fried chicken and a supermalt and I’ll enjoy this sh!t!!! Yeah! I’m not a pro wrestling fan so what!!!! At least not any more!!!

Oh f**kin hell, These so-called Real Americans… time to have a p!$$…. Oh Zeb Coulter SHUT THE F**K UP…

Hold up – did Zeb just wish death on 2.5 so called ethnic minorities??? If you still a Coulter fan I am liable to punch you in your f**k!n mouth.

Ok Usos – don’t let these bigots beat you this time! If they beat you, you have disgraced Rikishi, Haku, Superfly Snuka, Umaga, Tamina, Roman Reigns, The Rock, and most importantly, High Chief Peter Maivia!!!!

YES! YES! YES! YES! I’m feeling like Danielson right now!!! GWARN USOS!!! The stars and legends are proud!!!! IT’S ALL ABOUT THIS SAMOAN FIST!!!!

Now for some serious sh!t…. The Miz got Cena and Danielson on his show, and was told by Danielson to stop his noise before he boxes him in his mouth! Cena spouts the same sh!t, it is real talk what he says though, he deals with critics every day, he knows he hears them (and by that, he means you IWC) go on about his 5 moves of doom and his make a wish stories… but Danielson says he’s in this sh!t for the WRESTLING!! That Cena is a parody of this wrestling sh!t!!! Which weighs out more? Hold up Cena used the dreaded W word – WRESTLING! BACKSIDE!!!! Yo I gotta song for the both of you, but before I do, Cena goes on like he’s beaten everybody…. NEWSFLASH!!! You haven’t beaten Undertaker rude boy! Now for the tune…. It’s a shame, people in the rap game, only in it for the fame extra-large!!!!

Cena is not a WRESTLER? The respect isn’t there? Triple comes out to maintain order? Randall reminds em what he got in his hand? SH!T JUST GOT REAL!

Now let’s have some fun… what the f**k has R-Truth done to his hair???? Has he relaxed his hair or something?

Quote of the night comes from Jerry Lawler – “I bet you wanna dance with Summer Rae, dial 1-800-YOU WISH!!”

Don’t you love that when Fandango gets buss arse, he still can breathe enough to say what his name is? Why does Summer Rae continue to hang around with this sissy?

Ok Battle Royal jump off!!!! The winner, gets to fight Dean Ambrose for the US Title…. in YouTube!!!! Is it worth the hassle? I could back certain guys here but it’s for the US title, I mean big up to Ambrose for putting prestige on it, but it’s like, you dep pon YouTube!

Big up Kofi for using crazy skillz and agility to hold out in the Battle Royal! But those racist bastards had to eliminate him didn’t they? BACKSIDE! Well at least Usain Bolt and Shelly-Ann Fraser Pryce represented in the championships lately! Trust in my hero Mark Henry to eliminate the racist bastards! THAT’S WHAT HE DO!!! RESPECT!

Big ups to RVD for taking Mark Henry out to face Dean Ambrose! It’s a shame we won’t see them fight at the gathering unless someone hooks up YouTube on their iPh- “WELLLLLLL, IT’S THE BIG SHOW!!!” BACKSIDE!!! Just when the Shield was gonna move in on Mark Henry and RVD, Mr Iron Clad contract appears ready to bring the ruckus! Did you see the look on Seth Rollins face??? He was like – OH SH!T!!!! Now I get it!!! RVD fights Ambrose, Mark Henry & Big Show combine their force against the tag team champions. As for the Ryback….sh!t just hasn’t been the same since John Cena called the Ambulance on his @$$!!!

Ok here’s the main event! Yo what happened to Heyman’s ECW music???? Sound bwoy! DJ! Fix up man!

Summerslam MarvelIT’S A TRAP!!! Screamed the IWC and the WWE Universe! Well no sh!t Sherlock!!! Now according to Heyman, it’s up to Punk to play the ‘stupid hero’ and get buss arse, or not turn up at all and be a ‘smart coward’. Thankfully for Punk, he was neither… Wolverine knows about stealth techniques!!!! Disguised as a camera man, took the camera, beat it over Brock’s head with it – BLAOW!!!!! Grabbed a chair, took advantage of the fallen beast – slam it in his back bone – BLAOW!!! Heyman’s legs did run!!! And again, not one scratch pon him face!!!! It’s just like Paul Bearer back in the day – he always got away from getting buss arse by Undertaker after the betrayal and once Undertaker got his hands on Bearer – his goose cook! And soon that will happen to Heyman!

Now earlier in the blog I said that the quote of the night came from Jerry Lawler, well our survey says – NOT REALLY! It came from a random fan and it went a little something like this:

Cena: I’ve beaten HBK, Triple, JBL, The Rock, CM Punk…

Daniel Bryan: You call their names like they are better than me…

Random fan: THEY ARE!!!!









The Jobber Blogger #61 – TNA: Impact Wrestling 1/8/13

The Jobber Blogger TNA And The Infamous Informer WWE

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 The Jobber Blogger #61 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING 1/8/13


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Welcome one, welcome all! Perhaps even welcome more, but not too many, I’m really anti-social. It’s why I want to be a Writer for a career, I can’t stand people. They have them… faces…greasy faces with bad manners and expect me to do things! Well up yours! You can praise me from a far whilst I scowl and swear at you from a distance…behind a curtain… under the cover…. reading Spider-man comics.

So isn’t life fun, I suddenly just realised I could use this platform to complain about my life… I say life, I have nothing to complain about, well aside from Work, I’m not a fan of my job. It’s finally hit the “I’m done with this” feeling, and by finally I mean as of a year ago. I’ve had at least 4 “ways to leave work” plans in motion all of which I was talked out of. All this “it’s easier to get a job from a job” lark, hey, you only live once, why waste so much of my life doing something I don’t like. Sure I get paid, not a lot, but it’s money, and that of course in turn feeds my Comic book thirst and video game cravings and random spending on things I probably don’t need. But alas, the final verdict is to just bite the bullet…. and quit. I can’t quit, I have too much pride, so I’ve sunk to theft to get fired.

Ahh, anyone who has read this before knows that I am joking… mostly… about the theft part at least. So I shall encourage you to Read On, mighty readers, you. Let your eyes be my audience and I shall steal your life with worthless ranting about Wrestling!


(not used that in a long time!)

Impact Wrestling Logo


Speaking of worthless, this week’s TNA lived up to TNA’s own moniker or always having good ideas, but Terrible, TERRIBLE execution. It’s like they have the Good Cop, Bad Cop in management:

Good Cop – “So I have this awesome idea of this mystery guy sending in cryptic messages about coming to Impact next week, and no-one will know who it is, and it will build all this Internet Hype and we will have this Huge platform to do something awesome!”

Bad Cop – “Hey that’s a great idea… let’s make it so who debuts, No One Has Heard of!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!! And get this, HE CANT EVEN WRESTLE!! MWHAHAHAHAH!!!! And he SUCKS!”

Good Cop – “errr….? okay?”



I will save most of my rant for when I get to that part in the show, but aside from the Terrible ending, this show was solid.

We finally see Taz back, he does nothing but walk around outside yelling about how angry he is.

Don’t you hate it, when your sat with your arms apart and you just feel sweat dripping down your side.. it’s not even that hot.

Either way, Taz was banned from the Impact Zone because he “no-showed” the last two weeks for some reason. It’s stupid that it’s gotten this far, Taz could have been doing this when he first joined The Aces and Eights. I would like to see Taz used more than just an announcer, but who knows how this is going to play out. Though having him backstage as a “care free” interview personality could actually be rather interesting. Taz however was irate, and so angry, he called “Someone”…. that about sums up TNA’s fantastic writing.

Birthday Seat

Austin Aries kicks off the show by making his way to the ring, and this week he looks slightly better. He seems to like doing weird things with his facial hair, and weird things tend to just look… weird.

Though Aries has had a good few different looks over the years, so who is to say what is best?

Aries faces

Aries wanted to congratulate Chris Sabin (who the more I see as World Champ, the more I hate him) the only good thing about Sabin being the champion is that he can put on a great Main Event with Aries, and I for one would love to see that. And of course have Aries win the belt back, because he’s a fantastic World Champion. Sabin just isn’t at that level. But of course Aries’ main point was to discuss he winning the Bound For Glory series, and his big match tonight with AJ Styles.

I really liked the fact that Aries pointed out that for the first 10years of TNA, AJ Styles was the top guy, the best in the industry. And since A-Double has been back with TNA, he has been the most high profile performer.

And in typical Wrestling fashion, Roode crashes the segment.

Roode forgot my pants

Roode and Aries had an official “Break Up” with them both getting a little heated with one another, which works out fine as Roode is sick of being on a losing streak and declares “I’m going back to what won me the belt” and “people have forgotten what I am capable of”.

Of course I agree completely, Roode is the pinnacle of “World Champion Material” and for my money nobody has been a better World Champion in TNA since he had the belt, or even since AJ Styles last held it 3 and a half years ago.

Bobby Roode vs. Hernandez – BFG Series

Roode fell over

Is it bad that I enjoy the little “slip ups” it’s not in a “taking the piss” type of manor… it’s just really funny.

I still don’t know quite where to put Hernandez in all of this, I guess it’s kind of good that he is in the BFG Series and being used regularly. I do fully expect Chavo to turn on him eventually and that be a Grudge match at some point around Bound for Glory. But Hernandez is pretty good in the ring, but of course not as good as Bobby Roode.

They have a good back and forth match, Roode tried for the Cross-Face victory, but then went to his “what brought him to the dance” type of style (the very same style he still uses…) and landed a sneaky Low-Blow on Hernandez and Rolled him up holding the tights, but only getting a Two-Count. Roode proceeds to go and trash the outside area just as he did last week, and throws multiple chairs in the ring. Brian Hebner then removes the chairs as Roode uses a Beer Bottle and Smashes it over the head of Hernandez and gets the win.

I still find it funny when they sneakily use weapons that leave a distinct mess but the Ref plays it off as “meh, whatever”. Good ol’ Wrestling Logic!

Roode gets his first win in the Series and earns himself 7Points.

Manik cool

For the first time since we’ve seen TJ Perkins as the man behind “Suicide / Manik” I’ve been excited for the Character. And he actually pulled it off really well. Talking about how using this “Manik” Character and Mask created an identity to make a name for himself, when just being himself wasn’t enough. It was a little glimpse of a Dark Character turn that would see the good youthful TJ being drawn into the Manik character. Almost like a Superman / Rorschach where the Costume is their true identity, and the man beneath is the disguise.

Of course this segment was ruined by Chris Sabin pulling his “Sulky, I’ve been Slapped” face blabbing on and trying his best to cut a promo that sucked. I can’t even begin to explain how much I hate Sabin as World Champion. I used to love Sabin… now I can’t stand him!

Jay Bradley vs. Joseph Park (w/Eric Young) – BFG Series

So before the match the new partnership of EY and Park showed EY giving Park a gift to help him out in the ring. The gift was Amateur Wrestling style Head-Gear to protect Park from taking too many hits to the head / being busted open and losing control.

It’s interesting to think about, but seeing as pretty much everyone else (if not… everyone else) who has won Gut Check has recently been Fired, you have to think, if Bradley wasn’t a part of the BFG Series, would they have fired him too? I still like Bradley, but thus far, he isn’t exactly anything special. It’s a strange position for him to be in given his experience and development, not to mention the recent layoffs.

Bradley focus’ on Park’s head-gear and eventually removes it, setting him up for the “Boom-Stick” to which Park catches him with a Samoan Drop and picks up a victory and 7Points.

The Main Event Mafia have their own “Club House” variation set up in the back that is all fancy decorated, I guess it shows they are in touch with a more “classy, sophisticated… womanly… side?”

MEM feminine

Sting talks about that to take down The Aces and Eights, they need to make “Sacrifices” and are they all ready to make this potential Sacrifice, and make an offer to the Aces and Eights “They can’t refuse!” I am sick of hearing that saying too. But it’s not as bad as Rampage Jackson adding “No matter what they say, I came here to fight!” Who is he talking about? Why did anyone give him a line to say? This guy sucks so much!

I hate him nearly as much as I hate Sabin being World Champion. Why are you spending money on Rampage Jackson? How the hell did he get an Acting Job. Whatever “build up” he had when he first debuted is just gone now. He looks impressive, he could have worked quite well as an “Angle” but not a official part of the Roster.

Manik vs. Chris Sabin – Champion vs. Champion

If there is any good to be found in Sabin being World Champion, it’s that we get this match! Sabin and Manik put on a great opening set of moves, counters and reversals to “test the water”. But you know what this showed above anything else, the very same thing I said since “Suicide” came back… he is better than Sabin. And putting them against each other made a great match, but he is better than Sabin.

TNA’s saving grace is it’s “WRESTLING” part of their Roster, and Sabin and Manik led the way with a fantastic match, a match that for me goes into the category for Match of the Year.

There is little else I can say that will do it justice, just watch it if you haven’t seen it already.

Sabin connects with his “Hail Sabin” and picks up the win. Which is when Bully Ray attacks Sabin from behind. Now I have expected Manik to not help out Sabin, and in a way, he didn’t. He just so happened to get in the way and Bully turned his attention to Manik, which left Sabin an opening to fight back at Bully, and Bully to leave. But after the “what the hell are you doing?” storyline of Bully’s lawyer last week, it was better to actually have Bully be a Bully and just beat up the guy.

Earlier on in the night we saw a White – Hummer – Limo arrive, with everyone speculating that the #August1Warning was inside. Taz who was still rambling and wondering around outside decided to show the world who it was. And instead opened the door and just laughed. And we see there is a Laptop set up with the same Warning Videos being played.

Gail Kim vs. ODB

I keep making a note to mention this every week, but Gail Kim’s new mix of her music is really good! I always felt the original was a bit too drawn out and took a while to get going. They revamped the intro which goes straight into the Vocals, so it fits better. Good stuff!

So guess what, after nearly a year of Taryn Terrell being made the official Knockouts Referee after what… 10years of having the normal Ref’s refereeing the matches, and then Joey Ryan and ODB. We actually just go back to having the normal Ref’s again. Jee… that seems like a good idea, why did it take them this long and pretend like it was such a big deal.

Though I did think, since her feud with Taryn, Gail has been front and centre for taking some hefty damage. The Last Knockout Standing match, the Ladder Match, and now ODB throwing her around pretty damn rough. I do wonder if Gail is happy to take this sort of onslaught.

Either way the match was more of a brawl, Gail attempted the Figure 4 Leg-Lock on the outside / Turnbuckle, but ODB countered. They ended up brawling on the outside and eventually got Counted Out, and continued to Brawl, so this is not done yet. Perhaps it will continue to Hardcore Justice, and letting them raise the bar once more? I don’t know.

AJ Styles cut a little Promo, he has done this before, but AJ isn’t always great at Promo’s, and I seem to remember some of his more recent ones didn’t quite “work” as well. But however this one, he nailed it! AJ is still my pick for the BFG Series, I love this re-invention and as always, TNA can bring in who they want, but AJ Styles in the heart and soul and always will be the Face of TNA Wrestling, and if he isn’t front and centre, then you’re doing yourself a disservice.

The Aces and Eights are in the back sorting out their problems, with Bully handing all the Main Event Mafia problems to Anderson, and Bully will focus on getting the World Championship back from Sabin. Which is when Brooke makes an appearance telling Bully that next week’s Contract Signing will have some implications he won’t be happy with. And that a “Happy Wife is a Happy Life”

Brooke Hogan crazy face

Sums it up nicely?

Austin Aries vs. AJ Styles – BFG Series

A dream match, and it truly is, and was. Yes you can make all kinds of interesting matches out of these Wrestlers. But Aries vs. Styles is probably at the top. Though Aries vs. Kazarian I would love to see too.

They both had some hard hitting moments through-out the match, especially when Aries climbed the Top Rope and AJ Drop-Kicked him to the Floor. Though I did find the crowds “Come On, Beiber!” Chant to be rather amusing.

AJ attempted the Styles Clash on the Ramp which Aries countered into a Back-drop that sent AJ straight to the floor in a very painful looking manor. Aries then attempted his “Suicide Dive” through the Ropes to the Ring Steps like he did last week with Roode. But AJ Side stepped, sending Aries face first into the Steps.

Another match that will be a contender for Match of the Year, if it wasn’t for the ending.

AJ landed his Pelé on Aries which was a desperation move, and both of them falling to the floor, only Aries landed with his Arm on top of Styles, but he also moved Styles’ arm on top of himself. It looked really awkward as a finish. Either way apparently Aries got his Shoulder up just in time and took the Win. A dodgy finish to an otherwise Show Stealing match.

The Main Event Mafia make their way to the ring to close the show with an “Offer” to the Aces and Eights. Also:

Angle Shades 2

That never gets old. Though recent events might show that Angle isn’t in the best frame of mind of late, so it might explain his choice of Sun Glasses.

And come to think of it, maybe that explains what was going on a few weeks back?

Angle to Rehab

The Aces and Eights led by Anderson make their way to the ring to hear what the “Offer” is.

The Aces and Eights vs. The Main Event Mafia – 5 on 5 the one who gets Pinned / Submits must leave TNA for good. So this could be a way to get more Budget Cuts but tie it into a Story. Though time is against the Main Event Mafia for Angle is going to enter himself into Rehab. So either he is there now, or he could actually be the one to lose and “leave” TNA. Though for him to be entered into the Hall of Fame in a few months, the timing is all over the place.

Chances are a member of the Aces and Eights will lose, probably Garrett or Wes, or Knux… pretty much any of them aside from Anderson and Devon… but mainly Anderson. It’s an interesting idea, but it depends on who takes the fall, personally I want Rampage to turn on the Main Event Mafia, and probably take out Angle and Angle be the one to get pinned and disappear for a while.

Which is when the Lights go out in the Impact Zone, which is cool, so far so good right?

And then “MMA Legend” Tito Ortiz turns up.

So let’s put it this way, I know of the name, I don’t know who he is. But it appears that most people are not happy that he is in TNA. And this is my two-cents on the whole matter.

I get why TNA is doing this, having Stars from Celebrities to other Sporting Athletes is no strange carry on for Wrestling. From Mike Tyson to Mr. T to Arnold Schwarzenegger and Mickie Rourke, (David Arquette anyone?) there is a huge long list of “famous” people outside of the Sport to get involved. Spike TV runs Bellator MMA which is doing some big business for them, it follows Impact, so the mixing of both brands does business both ways and keeps Spike TV happy. UFC / MMA is the biggest Sport to have come out in the last few years, it’s reach is huge. It shares some Fans of both Sports and of course there is some huge cross over’s from the likes of Brock Lesnar to Dave Batista and even The Undertaker. So for TNA to bring in King Mo, Rampage Jackson (which did make headline main news) and now Tito Ortiz, I get that it sheds a bigger light on TNA. But here is the problem.

Most Hardcore MMA fans love the Sport because of what it is, and what it isn’t, is Wrestling. Sure they have Amateur Style Wrestling as part of the Mixed Martial Arts, but it’s not in the realm of Professional Wrestling, they are in no way the same thing. So a good portion of their Fan base and Audience don’t want to watch them try and be actors and do silly story lines and “pretend” fight. The bigger problem is just how Hardcore and Passionate the Wrestling fan base is, and it’s the true old school Wrestling fan base that is drawn to TNA, so you bring in guys who aren’t Wrestlers, and try and cash in on a bigger Audience, guess what… People Hate It!

To make matters worse you have just recently fired some top talent like a Doug Williams, Matt Morgan, Tara, Joey Ryan, Crimson and the list goes on and on, and you replace them with a higher paid Non Wrestler like Tito Ortiz…. guess what, People Hate It More!

TNA is what it is because it has the Very Best “Wrestling” Locker-Room in the industry. Now it doesn’t, because you dilute it with Celebrities and try and play it off as okay. I don’t care in the slightest about all of these MMA guys, let MMA be MMA, and don’t try and promote yourselves because of their success. This is the problem, TNA always, ALWAYS falls short, and it’s over dumb choices like this. If you debuted a Brand New Wrestler, who was impressive, that would have been awesome. If you had brought in a Talent people knew, that would have worked with the potential to be awesome. Even if you just brought back a Gut Check competitor, or even a recently fired employee, that would have worked. But instead you bring in this guy… you made a mockery of yourselves, and you ruined yet Another perfect opportunity to do something big and meaningful. All you did was appeal to a certain Audience, and it’s not your own Wrestling Audience, no you pissed them off.

So let’s get to what actually happened, Tito walked out with a Stupid expression on his face and stood there for the best part of 5 Minutes as the Camera cut back and forth from his Stupid Expression to the Wrestlers pretending to be “Shocked”. It Sucked… a lot.

However Anderson did save the day as they cut from Tito’s Stupid Expression to Anderson who was doing this:

Tito who

I think Anderson speaks for us all.

So a major Blunder yet again by TNA, and if TNA are going to be remembered by anything, it would be for the amount of times they themselves created fantastic opportunities, then shat all over them.

Aces and Eights

Gut Check

August 1

Sting (no one saved me)

AJ Styles

The list goes on and on and on and on and on and on and on and on.

One day.

Till then,


TNR Cover 12

Smack Talk Centre-Raw Monday Night Raw #1054: August 5, 2013!!!

The Jobber Blogger TNA And The Infamous Informer WWE

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Smack Talk Centre-Raw

Monday Night Raw #1054: August 5, 2013!!!

Let me tell you something about me: I love hip hop, I come from the era where every artist came different, had their Corporate Austinown style and was being ORIGINAL. there was no biting… (what’s this got to do with wrestling) shut up and let me finish…??? Hip Hop is about EXPRESSION. Scratch that – Madonna did a tune called Express Yourself. That’s what Daniel Bryan be doing. EXPRESSING HIMSELF. He loves his beard, his crazy hair, and his wild technical wrestling style. NO ONE wilds out like Danielson, and the McMahons realise this that he is on the edge of being THE MAN of the company. So now they want to give him a makeover, try to mould him and be this corporate dude… THAT AIN’T GONNA WORK!!!! Just like I said last week, look what happened with Austin!!!! My advice to Danielson…. Tell the McMahon dem seh – DO YOU… BECAUSE YOU CAN’T DO ME!!!!


WWF PROPA TINGZI thought they banned the initial stage fireworks at the start of the show???? Ah forget it – Stephanie McMahon is on! GOD DAYUUUUUM!!!!

Well actually the makeover could have been a lot worse! Danielson comes out sporting a suit, his hair gelled back, and his beard is INTACT!! Maybe a woman’s touch works right??? Stephanie fix him up!!!! And Brie Bella couldn’t do that??? Yo Brie you may need to watch your girlfriend!!!! That goes for you Triple! Watch your wife! You saw what happened with her and Kurt!!!

Wait a minute – here comes Vincent Kennedy!!! And he’s not entirely satisfied!!! He wants the beard shaved off!!!! Vincent Kennedy sends for the barber chair… and tells Danielson – “GET IN THE CHAIR!!!!” I’m gonna be saying that all week!!!!! HA! HA! Did the beard go??? HELL NAWWWWW! Wack Barrett was gonna do the honors but Danielson beat him down and shaved half his beard! Next minute he reveals his new shirt – a dart thrown at Cena here – ‘THE BEARD IS HERE!!!’ at the front, and ‘YES! YES! YES!’ at the back!!! So that’s the rumoured heel turn of Bryan out the window!

Now this is interesting… Christian is already #1 contender for the World Heavyweight Title…but Rob Van Dam beat Bertie! WHOA!!! I smell a triple threat match brewing… but wait there – Ricardo baited up the match for Bertie! He didn’t mean it to go down that way, but Bertie kicked him down! Beat him down! Threw him out the ring! Placed his head between the steel steps and the ring post – ran up and kicked him – BLAOW!!!!!!! Oh lawd Ricardo – HE’S PROBABLY DEAD BY NOW!!!!

Now that Cody Rhodes has turned face, he finally has a voice???? Ok Cody you have given me joke by throwing Sandow’s briefcase in the drink… and you had Sandow crying like a b!tch…. you brought the briefcase back and it’s all mash-up! The contract looks like it was fed to the fishes! Oh dear! How is Sandow gonna cash in his cheque now???? This needs to be addressed at the Board of Directors! But the crowd didn’t look interested at all in the storyline…. DISRESPECT!!!!!

Ok RYBACK! MY HERO MARK HENRY! But the tables are turned! This time Ryback is the villain! Mark Henry is my hero! GET HIM MARK!!!! unfortunately as Henry was battering him, Ryback took foot and run gone…. these two gonna clash again at Summerslam surely! SEND FOR THE STIPULATION! Mark Henry don’t like that count out sh!t…. w’happen Ryback? Your belly full????

While Cena is in the ring talking sh!t, lets talk about the divas for a hot minute… the BellaGRANT - BODY - P Twins, they are up their own arse ain’t they??? They so fine… first I’m saying hi… then I’m waving goodbye…. but did you see Natalya drop that slap in Brie’s face – BLAOW!!!!!! Bwoy they need to get up off the Hamster Wheel!

Oh right – back to Cena… he was talking something about – he’s been 5 moves of dooming jabronies since January and Summerslam will be no different…Randall appears and lets Cena know who got the cheque, and the Shield think this segment was WACK so they thought justice must be served, next minute Danielson runs through… now here I was waiting for Teddy Long to say “Now hold on a minute playas” and announce a 6-man tag… but Brad Maddox has already learnt well!

Hold up – The Wyatt Family are in a match???? WHOA!!! Er Cameron! Naomi! come and seek sanctuary!!!!

Enough of that sh!t – It seems that The Wyatt Family have brought back the true essence of my hero Kane!!!! First PPV for Bray – and he’s fighting Kane in an INFERNO MATCH?????? Hear Michael Cole – “What does he mean by ring of fire??!!!” Michael Cole you get the OFFICIAL DYAM ARSE AWARD!!!!

So that’s why my baby mother turned evil… she wants ATTENTION… Layla baby I always rise at attention!!! I understand though… I’ve been busy lately, yes I am writing for an indy female wrestler, but that’s BUSINESS. I’m still #AllAboutThat with you baby!!!! Don’t get it twisted!

Gotta say AJ & Layla -or should I say Lay-J skipping all over the ring after they beat down Kaitlyn is BRILLIANT!


While Christian is beating down Heath Slater I just wanna say HAPPY BORN DAY to fellow admin of the Smack Talk Centre and bossman of the BDSIR Network – Mike KNOXXX –  the championship belt KING!!! That’s right – spelt with three X’s because he’s HARDCORE! SALUTE MY NINJA!!!


THE CLAWS ARE OUT! “LET’S GO PUNK!!!!” It’s clobbering time! Time to go Wolverine on Curtis Axel!!!

You know what? As I watch this match, and I see the evil look on Heyman’s face, and Punk hell-bent on destroying his former mentor, I remember the film Unleashed with Jet Li and Bob Hoskins….

…and just as Jet Li gets his hands on Bob Hoskins… HERE COMES THE PAIN!!!! That music hits and IT’S ON!!!! CM Punk & Brock Lesnar! David & Goliath! But this ain’t the bible! This is WWE!!! It looked like Punk was kicking Punk all over the ring, but then he saw Heyman…. NO Punk forget him for now!!! Oh no Brock got him – F5 – BLAOW!!!! Brock nah dun!!! “HURT HIM!!!” says Heyman! Brock with the steel chair – hit Punk in his back – BLAOW! hit him again – BLAOW! hit him again – BLAOW!!!!!! WROOOOOOOOOOY!!!! Big ups to my girl Renée Young who had to interview Heyman and his boys! Hey Renee baby girl! Come and interview me… let’s get to the sex questions!!! Well Brock told Heyman to say something stupid, and maybe he has! Next week – Heyman Vs CM Punk??? that’s gotta be walking into Death Row surely!

Summer Rae DON’T START ME WITH THEM LEGS!!! You gotta n!**@ wilding right now! Hold on – Michael Cole just said that Summer Rae loves Kofi Kingston’s fighting style and his new attire? Kofi…. now’s the time to put that Jafakecan accent on! I swear I would ravish that woman!!! I’d F**K Summer Rae… I LOVE LAYLA!!!

Notice I didn’t mention Fandumbgay? HA!

You know it’s all eyes on the main event at Summerslam, Vincent Kennedy is mad involved in it… I forgot that Triple is out to counter whatever dastardly plan Vincent Kennedy is trying to pull!!!!

Oh no what are these three racist idiots doing out here??? Ok let me go and get a drink…

Hang on – their opponents are the Usos??? BRILLIANT! KILL THEM USOS!!!!

F**K! How the F**K that these so-called Real Americans beat the Usos??? Yo Rikishi you gonna have to get involved in this rude boy! I would so love that!

Yes! that contest between Ziggler and Langston sweet me! You know why? Because Kaitlyn came back to beat down the happy-go-lucky skipping psychopath AJ, everything went haywire, and it enabled Langston to hit Ziggler with the super move – BLAOW!!!! That goes to show that YOUR HERO – THAT PINK PANTY WEARING BATTYBWOY IS TRULY A PU$$Y! He can’t fight by himself! He is weak!!!!! BIG UP LANGSTON!


Ah forget about it – you wanna wrestling match? Check for Ring of Honor… because this became all out RUCKUS! And just when the three top guys of the WWE had the Shield shook, Randall already dun warned Cena & Bryan – I can cash in my cheque ANY TIME.. RKO to both Cena & Bryan – BLAOW!!!! And any time could have meant right there and then… because the voices in his head were saying – ‘CASH IT IN NOW!!!’ But the Shield came back to pick up the pieces! I guess Randall is a patient man!

Now the question is out there in the IWC – has Randall turned evil???? I wouldn’t say so… because he dun warned them what would happen. The crowd didn’t necessarily like what happened out there, but for Randall, it’s going his way and that’s what he wants…. it’s more a slow-ish heel turn if you ask me… but he STILL isn’t cashing the cheque in at Summerslam, I’m standing by my prediction… but either way, it’s a win-win for the Infamous Informer. No point getting worked up and angry about it….. to me it’s just storyline progress… and don’t forget the Triple Teef factor as well…