Tag Archives: Braun Strowman

Monday Night Raw #1306, June 4, 2018!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

DAYUUUUUUUUMMMMMMMM!!!

Sasha lb wear

ARE YOU SERIOUS RIGHT NOW SASHA???!!! GUUUUUUURRRRRRLLLLLL!!!! Sometimes… you have to use your cousin’s words against you…

On the Eastside, that’s the crew I choose
Nothing I do is new to you
I smack up the world if they rude to you
‘Cause baby girl, you’re so beautiful…

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1306! I’m not tryna be on the YouTube tip… I got big things poppin, little things stopping. And unfortunately wrestling fans… I class this as little things… more like your… (CENSORED!!!)

I think it’s safe to say that I can never watch RAW or Smackdown live because my streams no longer work good, and more often than not I’m yawning through the sh!t. With that said, me garne ah mi bed. YouTube highlights from now on…

You would think that by now Elias would learn not to perform in front of the WWE Universe every week… he always gets interrupted!

It’s like a Mexican stand-off! Only that Elias has his guitar, and Seth Rollins has his steel chair! Rollins just whacked the guitar out of Elias hands! Elias is looking like – heeeeeeeee!!!! All scared and sh!t!

Oh no Jinder Mahal TEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!! Putting beats on Rollins! SEND FOR THE SHIELD! GET DOWN THE STAIRS ROMAN!

Either WWE edited out the boos or we must be in one of those ‘non pro wrestling’ cities because Double R is getting cheered as he comes to the aid of Rollins!

Dayuuuuum 199 losses??? Do you think Curt Hawkins is out to beat the Barry Horowitz Losing streak record?

Ok just found out RAW was in Houston Texas…. Come on James Harden! Make it 200!!!

Hold up – Baron Corbin? What is the meaning of this?

Baron Corbin hit the End of Days! The official is calling for the bell! OH SNAP!!! James Harden just WON BY DISQUALIFICATION! WHICH MEANS Curt Hawkins LOST AGAIN! It’s in the record books!

Turns out that Baron Corbin is now the ‘Constable’ of Monday Night Raw? Ah wha de rarse?

Hold up – Bobby Lashley – where is your fashion sense? You’re wearing a tight up jacket with a muscle t-shirt, jeans and cap? THAT DOESN’T MATCH!

Sami Zayn is calling Bobby Lashley a liar! That his inspirational quotes on instagram don’t mean sh!t! He apparently has a fan club which you pay $19.99 to subscribe! Not even my good friend pictured below does that for that much! And she’s a model! Mother of 5 children, ladies and gentlemen I give you – HauteMamaOf5!

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Just for the record, I haven’t subscribed… because if my lady found out, I would be sleeping on the couch!

GRANT BODY-P!

But Sami says Bobby was never in the army!!! He can’t do that??!!!! I see Bobby getting bex now…

Dayuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum look at Renee Young! She’s talking to Woken Matt Hardy and Bray Wyatt of all people dressed like THAT? I’m sorry if that was me I would have to say something… fix my trousers like The Rock or something!

You see? Matt Hardy has the idea!!! Look at him biting his teeth! Renee looks uncomfortable! Renee says she’s woken but I’m high-powered – I’d f**k her back to sleep…

GRANT BODY-P!

Times like this I wished The Rock himself was on WWE doing these interviews with the likes of Renee, Charly Caruso etc… he’d tell em straight!

Oh dear… Natalya f**ked up her knee while fighting Nia Jax… you can see how this storyline is shaping up can’t you!

Nia Jax looks concerned actually… because Nia didn’t ‘injure’ the leg… Rousey is like – yo stay out of this!

What was that you fans were saying about Nia ‘turning heel’ in your memes? Shows you know a lot don’t you?

Jinder Mahal. JINDER MAHAL!!! HE SPEAKS THE TRUTH! He says Double R thinks there is a conspiracy against him when in actual fact he had the most opportunities! THAT IS TRUE! Jinder Mahal. JINDER MAHAL!

Guys – how can you NOT like Jinder Mahal??? This dude is funny!!!

“How dare you disparage my name!” He he hee hahahahaha JINDER STOP IT!

WOOOOOOOOOOIIIIIII!!!! And the fight is on!!!! JINDER MAHAL! ROMAN REIGNS! This is what I’m talking about!

Oh no! Alexa Bliss hurt her leg too! Come on Ronda get out here and see to your friend!

GRANT BODY-P!

Wait a second! Alexa is leaving the building! Alexa is playing games!!! I never trusted that beeeeaatttch!

COME IN BAYLEY! She just helped the team win! Good on Bayley! Hahaha Corey Graves is bex! Gotta love it!

ARRRRRGHH TEEEEEF! Because Bayley wasn’t officially in the match, The Riott squad win! Baron Corbin exercising his authority! TEEEEEEEEEF!!!

This is what happens when you think you are god! You have to deal with the monster among men Braun Strowman! Bobby Roode gonna GET THESE HANDS!

I don’t think I’ve seen Strowman do that suplex before!

Er… Bobby… I don’t think ladders are allowed in this contest!

Ah I see! Bobby tricked Braun into doing that ‘running round the ring’ sh!t! He rolled under the ladder and now he’s laughing at Strowman! I don’t think that is too smart!

WHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAAH!!!!! I’M DUN!!!!! THAT’S THE FUNNIEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN!

BRAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!!! HE BROKE THE LADDER WITH HIS BARE HANDS! BOBBY ROODE WAS LIKE – LAWWWWWWD JESUS!

(At this point this week’s blog has come to an abrupt end. The Infamous Informer was in so much hysterics that he cannot continue this blog! What Braun Strowman did was absolute GOLD. To find out more of what happened on RAW this week, hit up YouTube and find out!)

ROFL

GRANT BODY-P!

 

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Monday Night Raw #1302, May 7, 2018!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

SERIOUSLY???

backlash-fans-leaving

WALKING OUT THE JOINT? It couldn’t have been THAT BAD???

Guys – he didn’t win the World Wrestling Federation Championship… you do know that right?

You know what – your actions makes me NOT wanna write this blog word up!

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1302! Ok I do agree with you guys, Samoa Joe Vs Double R should NOT have been the main event… that’s taking the p!$$!

I got those big @$$ hula hoops, spicy chilli flavor, mint aero (actually I might put that back and wait for Smackdown because that’s Naomi flavour) and get the jaffa cakes… come on WWE give me some joke!

I am already experiencing problems with this stream, and with the mood I’m in, I might just switch it off, and put on that Cobra Kai thing on YouTube…  have you seen it yet? I’ve watched the first two episodes, and it’s already compelling! Good job Ralph Macchio!

Braun Strowman Vs Kevin Owens, winner goes through to Money Innah Bank… unlucky Kevin!!!

“THIS IS WHAT YOU DESERVE YOU COWARD!!!!”  Braun is f**k!n up Kevin Owens!

Check it – 4 superstars each from RAW & Smackdowns (Men & Women) will compete in the Money Innah Bank Ladder match… this is what I’m saying! STEP THEIR GAME UP! On the same token, this is on YOUR HEAD fans! You’re the ones like ‘cut down the PPVs’… so don’t come with your noise like ‘why is this guy not in it’??? SHUT THE F**K UP!

Happy Birthday Kevin Owens! Oh man! He really is getting birthday beatings!

HAHAHAHA!!!! The run around the ring and then box him down! PUT THAT MOVE IN WWE 2K19 PLEASE!!! What we do know… Braun is going to Money In The Bank… that’s worries for everybody!

The Big Dog is p!$$£d the f**k off!!! AND RIGHTFULLY SO! But what about Mr Lesnar? Aaaaaaah sheeeeeet he’s gonna beat the 434 streak for real!

Jinder thinks he should be in the Money In The Bank ladder match? He’s almost as insane as Kanye according to Jiggaman!

GRANT BODY-P!

Sasha Banks Vs Ember Moon Vs Ruby Riott… winner goes to Money In The Bank… Sasha girl you fine but backing Ember Moon here!!! OWWWWWWWW!!!

OH SH!T! Something went down in the crowd to make security escort them out the building! What the hell happened? Answers on a postcard please! Crowd was chanting YOU DESERVE IT! Don’t tell me someone was masturbating over Liv Morgan?

GRANT BODY-P!

The Riot Squad being teef with Sasha Banks! Bayley came down to help! But this enabled Ember Moon to hit the Eclipse on Ruby Riot – BLAOW!

Gotta love WWE right? Talking about Bobby Lashley’s career, and blatantly ignoring the

Renee ypung sexy ass

Photo courtesy of Edd Mulhall

TNA sh!t! Renee Young wants to know about Bobby Lashley the man… more like she secretly wants some BBC –

OH MY GOD!!! SOMETHING’S HAPPENING!!! YO YO YO!!!! STOP IT!!!

Check it – Jinder Mahal must defeat Chad Gable…if he wants to get into the Money In the bank… wait – the Coach just said Chad reminds him of a young Kurt Angle… Jason Jordan are you watching this???

Jinder Mahal got the Collass on Chad Gable – BLAOW!!! But Mahal wanted to buss up Chad Gable after that… oh dear…

After all that!!!! Kurt Angle gave Jinder a NAUGHT! What a b!tch!

Who would want to Walk With Elias when you can Strut Gloriously with Bobby Roode??

There’s my pick right there!!! Bobby Roode to win the Money Innah Bank! Imagine the storylines going forward! Braun is too obvious… he would cause the most ruckus….actually he would be a good choice as well!

Who wants to test Seth Rollins for the Intercontinental Championship? Oh no… Mojo Rawley? This fool? Yo Seth – send for the TANDEM ENGINE!

Gotta admit – Mojo Rawley is going IN against Seth Rollins! But he couldn’t withstand the curb stomp – BLAOW!

Look at Rollins swinging the belt like a helicopter like his name is Petey Pablo!

Fancy that… The Deleater Of Worlds facing ‘Daxel’… Brother must fight brother! (Wyatt Vs Bo Dallas) This should be good!

Oh it’s finished already? Sorry I was playing Street Fighter…

GRANT BODY-P!

Finn Balor Vs Sami Zayn Vs Roman Reigns! Winner goes to Money Innah Bank! Imagine if Reigns won… oh boy oh boy!

OH SNAP! WWE is in the UK next week! Aaaah sheeeeeet! Get restraining orders ready for the following women: Natalya, Nia Jax, Naomi, Charlotte & Becky… if the Infamous Informer is within 10 feet of those lovely young ladies – arrest him on the spot!

WWE SPICE GIRLS

Jinder Mahal baited it up for Reigns! He’s gonna pay for that I will assure you!

Finn Balor hits the Coup De Grace on Sami Zayn! Balor advances! Are you happy now muthaf***az? Balor is on a PPV! Now shut the f**k up!

GRANT BODY-P!

 

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Monday Night Raw #1282, December 18, 2017!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

On this day, we celebrate the birthday of arguably WWE’s biggest superstar of all time – Stone Cold Steve Austin! We have to salute this man, he is the reason a lot of you wrestling fools are whining b!tches! He switched up the wrestling game to a point where all you wanna do is ‘go back to THAT era’… He switched up the crowd participation to the point where you still chant ‘WHAT?’ to a wack promo…to you jabronies who just cannot move on, even Austin himself has a solution…

Steve Austin cum bye ya

Kumbaya my lord… Kumbaya…

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1282! ENOUGH F**K!N ABOUT… Let’s get this Royal Rumble show on the road!

Steph Raw

Now I wasn’t in effect last week, and Braun Strowman and my hero Kane tried to destroy each other… both lost the match… but this week, Brock Lesnar is here… heading to the ring with no fear… does he wanna test both of them? What happened to Finn Balor? I thought he was meant to fight Brock at the Rumble according to dirt sheets?

 

DO YOU KNOW VINNY MAC???

Well – Royal Rumble jump off – it’s a Triple threat situation, and Kurt took foot and ran!

It’s gonna be 3 monsters colliding! I hope they leave the ring in one piece in time for the Rumble… because at this point, there might not be a Royal Rumble at all!!!!

Now as I see my dude Seth Rollins, word on the street is Scott Dawson of the Revival is now cleared to wrestle…

I don’t see Scott Dawson though… I see Jason Jordan… the crowd doesn’t like that!

Jason Jordan obviously has more heart than brains! He wants to take Samoa Joe! This muthaf***a took Brock Lesnar to the edge!!!

Jason Jordan will go through Seth Rollins to get to Samoa Joe! He’s coming like scrappy-doo isn’t he!

One thing you can say about the kid…he GOES IN. He got that ruthless aggression.

While this contest rolls on, I just wanna address something real quick. If you have time to create a twitter account, focusing your energy hating on Roman Reigns & Brock Lesnar… you sir are A B!TCH, you get NO PU$$Y, the girls call you UGLY, and quite frankly, you should KILL YOURSELF. I feel bad for the Soul N Sports team on BDSIR Network who have to deal with something like this.

GRANT BODY-P!

THE GRANT SAYS THIS: Jason Jordan, I admire your tenacity and desire to reach that brass ring, you got all that experience points behind you rocking with the best… don’t you think it’s time you went after the Intercon… what  Double R is the champion? Er… OH DEAR!

WHOA! Was Bray Wyatt singing a new song other than ‘The Whole World In His Hands?’ Anyway…

I wasn’t gonna write anything on the Miztourage Vs Finn Balor but – Hideo Itami now on the main roster??? ALLLLLRIIIGGHHHHT! That’s modifications on WWE2K18 for me to do!

Mike Cole drawing out history on Hideo Itami’s TRUE debut on the main roster???? WOW!!! Stay close to your loved ones people…

GRANT BODY-P!

They referred Hideo Itami’s super move as ‘GO TO SLEEP’! Ha! Your false wrestling god is never coming back now!

Cedric Alexander says he wants to be cruiserweight champion so bad he could taste it… well THE GRANT SAYS he wants Renee Young so bad he can taste her!!

OH MY GOD!!! SOMETHING’S HAPPENING! YO YO YO! STOP IT!!!

Now while Enzo and Drew Gulak is chatting puup… why is #HellInACell trending on twitter? Have I missed something???

Turns out it was something to do with Radar Radio & DJ Argue and some grime MCs….

Anyway I should really pay attention – Enzo is at commentary… where Nia Jax at???

Vincent Kennedy giving props to Bray Wyattth! Check it out!

Screenshot-2017-12-19 Vince McMahon ( VinceMcMahon) Twitter.png

So proud of him!!! HATERZ GOT NO BARS!

Wait  – Enzo gets a text or whatsapp notification on his phone… you think Nia Jax sent him nudes of herself??? He had to disappear quick time!

Drew Gulak is straight up cock blocking Enzo here! What a b!tch!!!

Question – has Asuka hit 200 NXT/WWE wins in a row? Well THE GRANT SAYS – Alicia Fox isn’t breaking Asuka’s sexy @$$ today!

Aaaaaah sheeeeeeet! Stephanie McMahon sexy @$$ is here?!!! Maybe she gonna announce the women’s Royal Rumble??? Come on Steph – get my d!ck hard like you usually do!

GRANT BODY-P!

Suddenly I’m not interested in Woken Matt Hardy’s foolishness!

Well I be damned! The Revival are back for real!!! Let’s hope they don’t get injured again! Suddenly I don’t trust Smack Talk Centre’s Pete Dunne… I’m scared he might spoil sh!t before it happens…

Seems like The Titus Brand have finally brought Dana Brooke in as their ‘logistics consultant’ or whatever she supposed to be… Yes I smell a Dear Deidre moment too…

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GRANT BODY-P!

That awkward moment when I’m no longer interested in Absolution Vs Mickie/Sasha/Bayley and I’m just waiting for Stephanie to come out…

Elias is a DUTTY BWOY! Does he really think Mickie James & Sasha Banks wanna walk with him?

 

And as for Bayley, doesn’t she know only nursery rhymes on some ring a round a rosey?

The Raw women’s locker room rushed the ring to beat up Absolution, as soon as Stephanie music hit – EVERYTHING STOP! You don’t think Absolution will beat down Stephanie as well do ya?

GRANT BODY-P!

YES! A women’s rumble! Send for the YES CHANT! Now I gotta back a chick to win!

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Monday Night Raw #1247, April 17, 2017!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

Right… the Soul N Sports massive n crew – they have something every Monday called ‘Best & Worst of the Weekend. Ok so here’s mine…

Best of the Weekend: Kendrick Lamar album – DAMN! Or more importantly the last tune on the album – DUCKWORTH. HOLY SMOKES WHAT A TUNE! Shout out to Styles P & Talib Kweli who also brought forth a solid offering in ‘The Seven’. Both highly recommended.

Worst Of the Weekend: Some stupid muthaf***a shooting down people while on Facebook live like it’s really funny, and muthaf***az sharing that sh!t like the buzzards that they are. Black people are being killed for no reason by police and this sort of sh!t happens. Vincent Kennedy is right – LIFE’S NOT FAIR! YES LIFE SUCKS…and then you – WHOA!!!!

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RAW 1247! You are still the inferior show! You got Alexa Bliss – NUFF SAID!

Gotta open this up with last week’s MVP and trust me – the WWE Universe will WELCOME Braun Strowman!!!

I guess Double R had to pay a penalty for ‘retiring the Undertaker’! That is something you just don’t do!

Kurt is giving Braun the night off – but Braun wants to f**k up people… OR ELSE! Kurt is like – or else what? Why the f**k isn’t there T-Shirts with that sh!t on it? This monster among men is OVER! And I hate using wrestling terminology – Do I look ike a wrestling nerd to you??!!!

Aaaah sh!t! Braun got the Golden Truth! I’m surprised he didn’t get Finlay and Jamie Noble!

GRANT BODY-P!

Is Kurt afraid of Strowman or something? He sent a flimsy referee to tell him he had the night off!

Sorry Enzo, Wu-Tang Tattoo on your arm but Raw is NOT the realest show in the room. How you doin?

That’s f**ked up – Revival only come the other day and Dash Wilder is out the game already with a fractured jaw? 8 weeks out the game – welcome to the main roster muthaf***a!

(They should have went to Smackdown – the A-show… that would not have happened!)

GRANT BODY-P!

You see that movie White Men Can’t Jump? There is a saying on there I will never forget: ‘When you win, you really lose, and when you lose you really win…’ such is the case for Miz & Maryse – they lost the match at WrestleMania but find themselves on RAW – which WWE claims as the A show but me and you (well some of you) already knew it’s not the case… conversely, Cena and Nikki won the match, but Nikki mashed up her neck again.

Deano is right – Miz looks ridiculous in a maroon suit – But this man right here – The Infamous Informer, would make it look good!

Quote from Miz ‘I wear this because this is what SUPERSTARS look like, but you Dean, you just look like ‘WRESTLERS’…whoa… is that an insult to the IWC????

…and the rivalry has been reignited! The Miz dropped real but annoying talk, but real talk nonetheless – talks about how Deano ‘fell off’, finding himself on pre-show, all sorts of sh!t! Deano is like – I don’t care about all that bright lights and sh!t – I just love this wrestling sh!t! I’ll fight for 20 people, 100,000 people, it ain’t nothing!

Next victim – was that Kalisto who Strowman tried to f**k up? Not before he was intercepted by the Big Show!

They haven’t changed TJ Perkins music! I was looking for that Bowser music… and he’s still doing the ‘dab’… is that what it’s called?

Titus has got the idea! Actually he and Apollo Crews wouldn’t make a bad tag team actually… Crews needs CHARACTER – Titus – you can finally make this so-called brand of yours happen!

Notice I haven’t talked much wrestling? Because quite frankly, I can’t be bothered… until now – Fatal 4 Way #1 contendership for the World Wrestling Federation Women’s grant-body-pChampionship… Mickie James – Sasha Banks – Alexa Bliss – Nia Jax… winner fights Bayley at the Payback joint… once again – backing Nia Jax – a part of me wants Alexa to win so she can get buss arse by Bayley…

Then again a apart of me wants either Nia or Sasha or Mickie to buss Alexa’s arse – I don’t give a f**k if she in her hometown! The commentator just said – Alexa is that chick who would break your heart, break your jaw and you would still look at her on instagram – NO SHE’S NOT!!!! THE GRANT SAYS – I’m on instagram @infamousgrantbodyp – and I don’t wanna look at her b!tch @$$… not when I have women like Rosa Acosta on my instagram!

Rosa Acosta

Who the f**k does Alexa think she is? How is she gonna scream at Sasha – ‘This is my division now!’ This is what I mean – the ratchet has NO MANNERS – she was as good as done in the bank statement, but sh!t – Nia did all the damage and Alexa took advantage and is now through to Payback! Backing Bayley 100%!! Promise me you won’t drop any poems Bayley!!!!!

Do you think Heath Slater watches Curt Hawkins in the back and thinks ‘I’m glad I’m not at the bottom of the barrel anymore?’

GRANT BODY-P!

OH NO!!!! Jericho just made a fantastic promo and the Drifter who keeps playing the guitar for no reason just made the list!

Now on to Wyatt… who according to you guys, loses every feud… but check it – what if Wyatt wins back the WWE Championship? Why is Brock Lesnar not scheduled to appear until AFTER Payback?

This ‘House of Horrors’ better be good Wyatt! We don’t have casket matches anymore! Damn…we not gonna have buried alive matches anymore… aah sh!t… I don’t think even I realised how big a retirement from the don of dons really was…

They say Jeff Hardy hasn’t been in a one-on-one match in 8 years. Yes I remember – last time, he was in a championship match against CM Princess Peach B!tch, and Jeff lost the title – if he lost – he had to leave WWE… that’s what happened and CM B!tch run him out the building… I remember cussing at him like – F**K CM P**K! It’s crazy how things change right?

See – I keep it 100 – I was NEVER a CM P**k fan. That was 2009. So you see wrestling fans… my dislike for Mr Brooks dates waaaaaay back…

While Cesaro has his dream match with Jeff Hardy… let’s give a shout out to Angela Yee… that is straight blatant outright teasing right there!

Angela Yee ice cream

Two things – One –  was the mighty RHYNO afraid of Braun Strowman?????

Two – I forgot to mention this earlier – funny how Big Show cussed out Strowman for beating on Kalisto – remember back in the day Big Show used to pick on Rey Mysterio? I suppose he learned his lesson when Mayweather f**ked him up at WrestleMania 24!

GRANT BODY-P!

Once again – The Big Show Vs Braun Strowman – come on guys – BREAK THE RING THIS TIME! One more time – we know The Big Show hasn’t got long left in his career!

Right now, according to you guys – Vincent Kennedy is jerking off until he falls out of his chair!

You mean to tell me Braun Strowman can push over an ambulance but he can’t body slam the Big Show? Oh he suplexed him? Oh ok… carry on…

This is it! HERE WE GO!!!! Or maybe not – counter technique – Strowman jumps off top ropes right into a chokeslam! And Strowman kicks out!

Strowman hits the powerslam supermove and Big Show kicked out! Come on guys – to the top ropes!

HERE WE GO! both guys battling it out! Braun jumps off the top ropes again – this time into a Sean Price punch! Strowman kicked out again! BACKSIDE! Vincent Kennedy must be a mess in the back!!!!

Booker-T said that Big Show would have to send for his big elbow off the top ropes – that was his super move back in the day – but Strowman hit the Superplex AND BRUKK THE RING!!!!! YES!!!! AND STROWMAN IS BACK ON HIS FEET! BUMBACLART!!!!!

Ok – Vincent Kennedy has officially cum. He hasn’t cum like that since he nearly got in Torrie Wilson’s panties back in 2001!

GRANT BODY-P!

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Monday Night Raw #1191, March 21, 2016!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

I stand before you an ashamed wrestling fan. Yeah I said it. I am disgusted to be apart of this community. I put it to you. I’m not a father but I am a proud uncle. Suppose one day I decided to take my niece and nephew to a local indie wrestling show, and the performers act like they gonna drop the people’s elbow but instead takes down his draws and reveals his sexual reproductive system for everyone to see, knowing that it’s filmed? Doesn’t look good does it? SORT YOUR SH!T OUT JABRONIES!

In other news, Sting denies any form of retirement… at least for now… looks like my STC From The UK co-host’s celebrations were premature…

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW #1191! Have you heard of Fifth Harmony? Nah, me neither, but I googled em… they can come to WrestleMania ANYTIME!

WWF PROPA TINGZI wonder why Stephanie looks so happy? Oh yeah I forgot – I GOT IN THAT PU$$Y And turned into the chojin!!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

Oh dear Triple is not at RAW! We got 60 seconds to get refund! I didn’t put my hand in my pocket – did you???

Sheeeet! Roman Reigns doesn’t come down the stairs anymore! You jabronies hope he turns heel… I told you last week – ABANDON HOPE! What you think he’s gonna do – I already beat up Stephanie’s pum-pum!

How did Roman Reigns manage to silence Stephanie??? I mean I was gonna use a pillow but…

Stephanie tried to slap him! Roman used his kung fu and blocked it! “Now I’m the authority!”

You are still deluded… aren’t you? How is a ‘Double Turn’ (between Reigns & Triple) gonna work? Please wrestling fans… USE YOUR BENEFIT OF INTELLECT!

Crack open the Jaffa Cakes and the Supermalt – AJ Styles vs Kevin Owens! Y’all ready for some wrestling??? Sure you are… LET’S DO THIS SH!T!

How did Styles kick out of Kevin Owens frog splash? Er it’s very simple really… he used his chi and wrestling instincts and combined his mental and physical prowess and kicked out at 2! YES AJ Styles can do it too muthaf***a!

How does chanting for AJ Styles make you LOSE the match? If you are not the fans and you are Chris Jericho! You guys need to sort a stipulation for this sh!t!

Where is Ziggler going? In fact where is The Miz going? All of a sudden these muthaf***az wanna test Kevin Owens for the Intercontinental Title? I thought Sami Zayn had beef with Owens?

Here he is! Mr Zayn! Ok just throw all these muthaf***az in a ladder match for big BIG WrestleMania!

Well KO is hoping that those three jabronies can battle it out for the chance… Well, Ziggler, Zayn and Miz could make for a fantastic contest!

Talking of jabronies… are you STILL negative about WrestleMania??? Are you still throwing ignorant memes? Well meme no more… first Mick Foley gives Deano a bat with barbed wire, now Terry Funk gives Deano a chainsaw???? Er Brock… I never thought I’d say this but… YUH GOOSE COOK!

Is it me or Kevin Owens sound intimidated when he was speaking to Stephanie? HAHAAHAHA!

New Day Rocks so much that even the League of Nations have to laugh at their promos! New Day Killing em! They just said to Sheamus – they could have named him ‘Stephen’! Er… that IS HIS NAME RIGHT??!!!

Oh no! As Rusev is getting beat down by Big E, Xavier sends for Francesca II! I think it’s safe to say that the New Day have turned face under our noses folks!

Wait a minute… Vincent Kennedy has an announcement regarding Hell In Ah Cell? Ok this is the part where I get nervous… not around the Wyatt fools though… they talking sh!t as usual…sounds like at least for the moment, Braun Strowman wants to test Deano… if Deano is bringing his new gifts with him, Braun Strowman will become Doodoo Brown Strowman!

GRANT BODY-P!

Big BIG WrestleMania 32 LOGO

By calling yourselves ‘Voltron’ Social Outcasts… you have insulted the Wu-Tang Clan. That is something you just don’t do!

NOW Look what you done! FYYYYRE!!! IT’S KANE!!!! Dashed those Social idiots out! Then chokeslammed The Big show from the top ropes – BLAOW! There’s my dude for the Andre the Giant Battle Royal jump off this year!

WHAAAART? Fandango still works here? I suppose he gotta get that WrestleMania money… that’s it Jericho…. KILL HIM… wouldn’t it be crazy if AJ Styles came out chanting ‘Y2J’ and throw him off his game and have Fandango win? It would be HUGE!

WHOA!!! What the rarse did I just say! AJ Styles chants ‘Y2JACK@$$!’ but Jericho was still able to win… come on now stipulation!!!!

“I’d love to see that at WrestleMania…” NO YOU DON’T MIKE COLE! You saw it already how many blodclart times!

Yo they are hyping up this Hell In A Cell match with all these promos and what both Shane and Undertaker can do… aaaah sh!t the hype is real people! Whoever Loses – I WIN! Shane wins… he takes control of the company. Undertaker wins, I TAKE CONTROL of theGrant Body Pcompany! Whatever the outcome… I WIN!!!!

Hold up – How come Kevin Owens is switching this up! How come he’s announcing Stardust, Sin Cara & Zack Ryder???

Uh-Oh! Sami Zayn gonna deal with the case! Miz & Ziggler are on their way too! Yes – throw the lot of em in the ladder match! DO IT STEPHANIE!

Everybody needs a WrestleMania pay check right???

Calling it now – Either Owens will retain, or Sami Zayn becomes the next Intercontinental champion…. the feud will continue into a personal one on one situation between the two at the Backlash joint. (Extreme Rules Grant) – yeah yeah I know! For those jabronies who think Zack Ryder gonna win… ABANDON HOPE!

Check it out, Stephanie calls Triple to pick her up, they about to leave the building. Just as the car pulls off, look who’s waiting… Roman Reigns! He wants to beat down Triple’s Blodclart! Roman is so lucky it wasn’t 15 years ago when Triple had 10 men behind him! But makes his escape! He gonna get his hammer for sure!

So while Natalya and Charlotte compete in the ring, and Sasha and Becky are squabbling on commentary, lets throw up a pic of my wife who got away… look at her soul glow!

Naomi glow

While R-Truth fights Bubba Ray Dudley, we got breaking news from the bossman of the BDSIR NETWORK – MIKE KNOXXX! He has a special interview with the man called Kevin Owens! The World Wrestling Federation Intercontinental Champion! It is a CANNOT MISS episode! Tuesday 5pmEST 9pmUK – DROP THE BOMB ON EM! (Download links available after the show!)

Mike Knoxxx KO

UH-OH!!! VINCENT KENNEDY IS HERE!!! This is it… this is where I get nervous with the announcement…

WHOA! Shane could be Undertaker’s most formidable WrestleMania opponent??? More than Brock? Triple? MICHAELS???? Are you sure Vince?

Now Vincent Kennedy has said it now! Vince’s b!tch? If Undertaker doesn’t win, it will be his ‘last’ WrestleMania??? What does that mean? Undertaker retires? Or Undertaker just cannot compete at WrestleMania? Oh F**k… I knew this was gonna happen!

Suddenly I cannot write anymore… give me a moment… or a week for that matter…

SALUTE. GRANT BODY-P!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.

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Thanks to The Infamous Informer. For more Combat Sport Check us out at www.cageamateursuk.com