Tag Archives: Bray Wyatt

Monday Night Raw #1284, January 1, 2018!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

The rock JKJ

The joke is, the same muthaf***az who type that sh!t always end up having another bad year!!!!

YOU JEREMY KYLE JABRONI MUTHAF***AZ F**KOUTTAHERE!

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1284! IT’S A NEW YEAR YES IT IS!!!

Steph Raw

I hope the first segment is missable because I need a #2!!! Highly unlikely… it’s 2018 MUTHAF***A!

WHOA!!! Alexa Bliss Vs Asuka for the women’s championship? Oh wait… it isn’t… YET!!!

John Cena has put his name down in the Royal Rumble! Imagine if he wins… oh my days… the mass complaining on the internet!

30 entrants for the women too! You KNOW there’s gonna be surprises galore in that Royal Rumble!!!!

So they changed up Jason Jordan’s music and put lyrics on the muthaf***a!

Jason Jordan and Cesaro gonna clash! Yep – no disrespect – it will be a great contest but when you gotta go – YOU GOTTA GO!

Crowd chanting ‘Daddy’s Boy’! First time I heard that chant! (I didn’t watch wrestling at Christmas time because I thought it was disrespect to the superstars! Well at least they got paid…)

GRANT BODY-P!

Mike Cole said two weeks ago… Jason Jordan is rocking with the best but soon he has to start winning… and now Jason Jordan is doing just that – he beat internet darling Cesaro! Not sure how the IWC will handle that!

So they made Dana Brooke look like a more voluptuous Lana? I can ride to that!

Safe to say whoever loses out of this Bray Wyatt/Apollo Crews match is a b!tch… I expect Matt Hardy to appear on the titan tron and start his sh!t again!

I thought Bray Wyatt wanted a piece of Dana Brooke! Her distraction didn’t work! Sister Abigail to Crews – BLAOW!!! Sorry Dana you’re not quite Lana!!!

Wyatt is still gonna get deleted!!!! OH NO!!!

WHOA!!! Alexa tried to force Nia to choose her or Enzo! That didn’t work out too well! Just get in the ring with Asuka and shuddup!

Asuka be throwing Shaolin Kung Fu techniques at Alexa! Alexa’s Harley Quinn fist is powerless!

Why do these b!tches think slapping Asuka in the face was a good idea? It usually means curtains for them!

Asuka is a clever chick! Not only is she in the Rumbles, but she also beat Alexa Bliss! This means even if Asuka doesn’t win the rumble, she is STILL the #1 contender for the title! GENIUS!

Bwoy Renee Young sexy @$$ has to stay professional interviewing Samoa Joe… the dude who ‘injured’ Deano – and went on to say he has to stay at home living off his wife’s paycheck! OH SHEEEEEEEEEEET!!!! GUNSHOT!!!

Brock Lesnar doesn’t give a f**k if Heath Slater has kids…. and by the sounds of things – neither does Braun Strowman, and even worse – neither do the fans! Is that how you wish a happy new year to your favourite jobber? How barbaric are you people?????

Even a RHYNO is no match for the monster among men!!!

Hahaha that Jason Jordan kid – he thinks he’s down with The Shield doesn’t he? “Yeah we gotta stay focused, and if The Bar interfere in your match, we will be there – Believe That!” Roman Reigns is looking at Jason Jordan like – ‘WHERE’S HE GOING????’

WHOA! Finn Balor found his Bullet Club bredrins to go against The MizTourage! Let the masturbating begin! FOR YOU THAT IS!

GRANT BODY-P!

Top 100 friends

This is how it goes down – if Double R gets disqualified, he loses the Intercontinental Championship! If I was Double R, I would beat him proper, THEN KILL!!!!

Apparently Double R was fined $5ooo… POCKET CHANGE!!! His daughter still had a powerful Christmas, and his wife probably gave him some Christmas pum-pum!!!

It might be an observation, but the ‘Roman Sucks’ chants are not as dominant like the Cena Sucks chants… bear in mind it’s in Miami Florida, you think the male wrestling fans have ‘grown up’???

GRANT BODY-P!

Samoa Joe – TEEF! He tried to push Double R into the referee! The plan didn’t work! Double R shifts into a spear – BLAOW! Even the crowd gives it ratings! You see? Roman Haters never win! They only make themselves look more stupid!

1 hr left of this and bed is calling me…

F**k!n Hell – Elias tried to sing that stupid New Year song, and for 37 years, I don’t know why the f**k some of you jabronies hold hands and sing that sh!t! What the f**k does it even mean?! Don’t even send answers on a postcard – I’m going to bed… no wait there… the Bullet Club are on… nah f**k that – I can catch up with this in the morning word up…

Somehow I am still hanging in there! This wrestling sh!t is boring me, but maybe Brock Lesnar will end it strong…

Brock Lesnar fears no challenger (s)!!! THAT IS TRUE PEOPLE!

My hero Kane hit the chokeslam on Lesnar! But Lesnar sat right up and laughed at Kane! Kane is like – MUTHAF***A!!!

Notice – when the don of dons hit the chokeslam on Lesnar a few years back – Lesnar wasn’t sitting up at all…his back hot him… I’m just saying…

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Monday Night Raw #1282, December 18, 2017!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

On this day, we celebrate the birthday of arguably WWE’s biggest superstar of all time – Stone Cold Steve Austin! We have to salute this man, he is the reason a lot of you wrestling fools are whining b!tches! He switched up the wrestling game to a point where all you wanna do is ‘go back to THAT era’… He switched up the crowd participation to the point where you still chant ‘WHAT?’ to a wack promo…to you jabronies who just cannot move on, even Austin himself has a solution…

Steve Austin cum bye ya

Kumbaya my lord… Kumbaya…

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1282! ENOUGH F**K!N ABOUT… Let’s get this Royal Rumble show on the road!

Steph Raw

Now I wasn’t in effect last week, and Braun Strowman and my hero Kane tried to destroy each other… both lost the match… but this week, Brock Lesnar is here… heading to the ring with no fear… does he wanna test both of them? What happened to Finn Balor? I thought he was meant to fight Brock at the Rumble according to dirt sheets?

 

DO YOU KNOW VINNY MAC???

Well – Royal Rumble jump off – it’s a Triple threat situation, and Kurt took foot and ran!

It’s gonna be 3 monsters colliding! I hope they leave the ring in one piece in time for the Rumble… because at this point, there might not be a Royal Rumble at all!!!!

Now as I see my dude Seth Rollins, word on the street is Scott Dawson of the Revival is now cleared to wrestle…

I don’t see Scott Dawson though… I see Jason Jordan… the crowd doesn’t like that!

Jason Jordan obviously has more heart than brains! He wants to take Samoa Joe! This muthaf***a took Brock Lesnar to the edge!!!

Jason Jordan will go through Seth Rollins to get to Samoa Joe! He’s coming like scrappy-doo isn’t he!

One thing you can say about the kid…he GOES IN. He got that ruthless aggression.

While this contest rolls on, I just wanna address something real quick. If you have time to create a twitter account, focusing your energy hating on Roman Reigns & Brock Lesnar… you sir are A B!TCH, you get NO PU$$Y, the girls call you UGLY, and quite frankly, you should KILL YOURSELF. I feel bad for the Soul N Sports team on BDSIR Network who have to deal with something like this.

GRANT BODY-P!

THE GRANT SAYS THIS: Jason Jordan, I admire your tenacity and desire to reach that brass ring, you got all that experience points behind you rocking with the best… don’t you think it’s time you went after the Intercon… what  Double R is the champion? Er… OH DEAR!

WHOA! Was Bray Wyatt singing a new song other than ‘The Whole World In His Hands?’ Anyway…

I wasn’t gonna write anything on the Miztourage Vs Finn Balor but – Hideo Itami now on the main roster??? ALLLLLRIIIGGHHHHT! That’s modifications on WWE2K18 for me to do!

Mike Cole drawing out history on Hideo Itami’s TRUE debut on the main roster???? WOW!!! Stay close to your loved ones people…

GRANT BODY-P!

They referred Hideo Itami’s super move as ‘GO TO SLEEP’! Ha! Your false wrestling god is never coming back now!

Cedric Alexander says he wants to be cruiserweight champion so bad he could taste it… well THE GRANT SAYS he wants Renee Young so bad he can taste her!!

OH MY GOD!!! SOMETHING’S HAPPENING! YO YO YO! STOP IT!!!

Now while Enzo and Drew Gulak is chatting puup… why is #HellInACell trending on twitter? Have I missed something???

Turns out it was something to do with Radar Radio & DJ Argue and some grime MCs….

Anyway I should really pay attention – Enzo is at commentary… where Nia Jax at???

Vincent Kennedy giving props to Bray Wyattth! Check it out!

Screenshot-2017-12-19 Vince McMahon ( VinceMcMahon) Twitter.png

So proud of him!!! HATERZ GOT NO BARS!

Wait  – Enzo gets a text or whatsapp notification on his phone… you think Nia Jax sent him nudes of herself??? He had to disappear quick time!

Drew Gulak is straight up cock blocking Enzo here! What a b!tch!!!

Question – has Asuka hit 200 NXT/WWE wins in a row? Well THE GRANT SAYS – Alicia Fox isn’t breaking Asuka’s sexy @$$ today!

Aaaaaah sheeeeeeet! Stephanie McMahon sexy @$$ is here?!!! Maybe she gonna announce the women’s Royal Rumble??? Come on Steph – get my d!ck hard like you usually do!

GRANT BODY-P!

Suddenly I’m not interested in Woken Matt Hardy’s foolishness!

Well I be damned! The Revival are back for real!!! Let’s hope they don’t get injured again! Suddenly I don’t trust Smack Talk Centre’s Pete Dunne… I’m scared he might spoil sh!t before it happens…

Seems like The Titus Brand have finally brought Dana Brooke in as their ‘logistics consultant’ or whatever she supposed to be… Yes I smell a Dear Deidre moment too…

deidre-photo-casebook-landscape7

GRANT BODY-P!

That awkward moment when I’m no longer interested in Absolution Vs Mickie/Sasha/Bayley and I’m just waiting for Stephanie to come out…

Elias is a DUTTY BWOY! Does he really think Mickie James & Sasha Banks wanna walk with him?

 

And as for Bayley, doesn’t she know only nursery rhymes on some ring a round a rosey?

The Raw women’s locker room rushed the ring to beat up Absolution, as soon as Stephanie music hit – EVERYTHING STOP! You don’t think Absolution will beat down Stephanie as well do ya?

GRANT BODY-P!

YES! A women’s rumble! Send for the YES CHANT! Now I gotta back a chick to win!

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Monday Night Raw #1280, December 4, 2017!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

F**k talking about WWE right now, it was wack last week. Like Matt Hardy, DELETE LAST WEEK’S BLODCLART!

GRANT BODY-P!

RePPiN4U Overeem

Let’s talk about the YOU – EFF – CEE! Holy smokes! It was a lot better than the card on paper word up. Michelle Waterson & Tecia Torres – OWWWWWW! You two would get it. They opened the show, good fight. Then Alvarez Vs Gaethje SMASHED IT. Gaethje had the match won, but Alvarez… MAXIMUM RESPECT to him. Let’s skip the third fight because let’s be real, they knew they couldn’t follow that match. Then Overeem Vs Ngannou – The Sean Price Punch heard around the world – GOOD LORD! Sean Price would be so proud! Even I turned it into a meme! I DON’T MAKE MEMES! And Max Holloway Vs Jose Aldo… I like Aldo but he was outclassed here…

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RAW 1280! EXCITE ME! HAVE STEPHANIE SUFFER A WARDROBE MALFUNCTION! LET XAVIER WOODS INVADE RAW DURING PAIGE’S MATCH DO SOMETHING!

Steph Raw

Survival kit: Spicy Black pepper crisps, Jaffa Cakes and Drinking chocolate… do you think that’s smart on my part???

And the booing has begun against Jason Jordan! I’m waiting for the crowd to start showing signs saying ‘Die Jason Die’!

I see someone in the crowd with a ‘Paige Marry Me’ sign…you sir have no taste in women, she is a dutty whore, she gives her pu$$y away, and well, if you want to contract aids I guess that’s up to you!

Well Double R did tell Jason Jordan to step up and take the opportunity! And Double J responded with a belly to belly to Double R! I guess NOW he has the big dog’s attention!

Gotta say Jason Jordan is GOING IN against Double R!

Look at Samoa Joe doing the knowledge! Aaaah man!

I’m telling you right now – This Jason Jordan dude – if he keeps this sh!t going – he gonna be champion in 18 months time. This match kinda reminds me of The Rock Vs Kurt Angle back in 2000 and The Rock put him over… you see what I’m saying?

Oh no! Samoa Joe gonna finish the job on a mash-up Double R but Jason Jordan intervened with a suplex to Samoa Joe! But why did Double R drop superman punch to Jordan? Oh yeah – he’s not a good guy, he’s not a bad guy, he’s THE GUY!

GRANT BODY-P!

WHAT A LYRIC! “Like Father Like Son right Kurt?!” Oh snap! making reference to the TNA days!

This ugly rarse… I hope Sasha Banks busses up her clart… but while Mandy Rose and Sonya Deville are at ringside… I’m not sure Sasha can win… unless Mickie James and Bayley steps in… and remember now – they haven’t troubled Nia Jax… or Asuka!

Oh snap! Sasha has brought her back up so that there is no teefing! The girl who is nice to look at but an ugly attitude – Yes I’m talking about Alexa Blitch – is on commentary. I just want Absolution to rush Alexa and beat up her blodclart!

COME ON SASHA! Kick down this b!tch! Talking about its ‘her house’ but you’re THE BOSS LADY! You represent HIP HOP! Don’t let Snoop Dogg be disappointed that you lost to someone who likes death metal!

Damnit! Sasha hit the Bank Statement but Paige reached the ropes! Absolution was ready to teef but Mandy and Sonya were still too strong! Paige recovers and drops the Ram-Paige – BLAOW!

I never noticed this but Sonya – you got no t!tt!£$! You got two backs! Oh no! Well you are getting that WWE money now – upgrade a cup size!

GRANT BODY-P!

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! ELIAS!!! For the first time – he made me laugh! He told Kurt Angle to put away his cell phone and hold his applause until he has finished! What if that was a McMahon on the phone!

Wicked wow – watch out now – Machine Gun Kelly is performing at Tribute To The Troops… well I won’t be watching that sh!t – CALLING KEVIN OWENS! SORT HIM OUT!

WTF?????? Nia Jax wants a piece of Enzo Amore? WHAT IS THIS? No no no this is not allowed! Shad get in there DO SOMETHING!

NIA SELFIE

You know Shad gonna have MAJOR BEEF with Kevin Dunn & creative now!

Suddenly I’m not interested in this cruiserweight match – I wanna know wha’gwarn with Nia and Enzo! HAHAHA this is gonna be great!

That’s the second time Elias has made me laugh! Did he just point out Machine Gun Kelly and say –‘no one knows who you are’?! FANTASTIC! Respect points gone up!

OH NO! I don’t think Braun Strowman likes that tune! BRAAUUUUUUUUUN!!!!

Elias run garne!!!! Wait there – maybe not – what was he thinking attacking Strowman from behind?

He busted his guitar over Strowman and it had no effect! That time he tried to run and he got ketch! Running powerslam – BLAOW!

I’M NOT FINISHED WITH YOU!!!

HOLD UP – My hero Kane is back! His crushed larynx has recovered!

He says they gonna clash next week… but where’s the stipulation at? Buried alive? Inferno? Even Mike Cole is asking!

Is Alicia Fox ready for Asuka? I dunno… she isn’t all there in her head!

The real question is – Is Asuka ready for the Infamous Informer?? Hey Asuka – Wait til you see my Heihachi Mishima sword!

GRANT BODY-P!

Oh no – these three idiots again… and it hurts me to say that about Sonya and Mandy…

They gonna kill Foxy! Ah well… I’m gonna miss her…GRANT WWDJC2

Paige loves Alicia… NO YOU DON’T…

Alicia – your legs did not run like last time! They turned into jelly and sh!t!

“The ramblings of a mad man…” I can’t believe Bray Wyatt said that about #Woken Matt Hardy… what de rarse?!!!! So hold up – he’s gonna delete Bray Wyatt? He might as well – Wyatt ain’t done sh!t!

GRANT BODY-P!

Apologies for not writing about the Tag Team Championship main event… I’m just waiting for the finish…

Sheamus TEEEEEEF! The Shield had the match won! But Sheamus deliberately got The Bar disqualified! But Kurt said – NOT SO EASY! YOU MUST RESTART! Now it’s a NO DQ match! That fool Booker-T doesn’t agree – but they ARE THE BAR right?

Samoa Joe – TEEF!!! He attacked The Shield for no reason! Double R came down to even the odds but by then it was already too late!

A better effort than last week… well done guys, still not up there with recent weeks, but put it this way – I didn’t find my bed halfway through…

 

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Monday Night Raw #1265, August 28, 2017!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

50 men have come, and 50 men have fallen. Officially – NO ONE can beat him! Love him or hate him – he had your attention and that’s real. RESPECT HIS GANGSTA!

Actually I wanna address the haters real quick… still in denial? Talking about ‘it took 10 rounds to take a non-boxer out’ – it will take me 10 seconds for me to tell you – SHUT THE F**K UP! Go and lose 10lbs, invest in that tenner in your pocket instead of ordering pizza for your racist fat @$$!

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1265! We getting money YEP! Hall Of Famer YEP! He deserves it YEP!

Steph Raw

NO RAW beginning? We just gonna start with The Miz with his annoying self!

We got Jerry Lawler on commentary! You think he’s gonna be dutty towards Alexa Blitch?

Just as The Miz was gonna chat sh!t, Kurt Angle interrupts the proceedings!

Kurt Angle has no respect??? I’d rather Kurt have no respect than The Miz having no manners!

Looks like there is gonna be in a battle royal! Winner faces The Miz at the No Mercy joint! Oh wait – I got it wrong – it’s running NEXT WEEK on RAW – Intercontinental title defense!

Remind me in the morning I must start watching the Mae Young Classic jump off… the #1 reason I put back on my WWE Network – me want to see the gyal dem fight!

The Miz seems to be enjoying what he’s seeing from this Battle Royal! Everyone dashing each other out the ring and falling on their side!

Oh so that’s why… he got his cronies up in the match too! But what if Bo Dallas or Curtis Axel win? (hypothetically…)

Bray Wyatt TEEEF! He wasn’t in the match! Appeared out of nowhere doing his children of the corn sh!t and dashed Finn Balor out! CALLING STIPULATION FOR NO MERCY!

Just when you thought Jason Jordan was the favourite to win… Jeff Hardy emerges victorious! Oh wow! I like this!!!! The Miz doesn’t like it I can tell you that!

Now that Enzo fights on 205 Live, the question remains – is he still gonna mix it up with the regular roster?

Big Cass is out the game for a good number of months! Dayuuuum… that’s his push on hold before it even began!

At least we can keep it moving because quite frankly, that storyline was wack homes!

Neville doesn’t seem to be impressed with Enzo’s fighting style! He thinks he’s gonna be champion for ever! For ever ever? FOR EVER EVER!!!!!

WHOA! Brock Lesnar twice in two weeks!!! Good lord! Not even Undertaker got this treatment with Brock’s appearance dates!

GRANT BODY-P!

Don’t get it twisted – I’m not that dude who complains about Brock’s status and how he defends his Universal Championship, actually I’m that dude who doesn’t give a f**k – I got nothing to lose – Brock can do what the f**k he wants!

Not just that… Brock spoke as well! Man this is serious! Snatched the mic from Heyman like “What he’s saying is – Suplex City B!tch!”

Hold up – Seth Rollins just teefed a move from Apollo Crews! He can’t do that! Standing reverse moonsault while opponent was on the canvas!

Uh oh! I like this! If Emma defeats Mickie James, it’s hashtag city! However, if Mickie wins, Emma can’t say she started this women’s revolution sh!t!grant-body-p

What the rarse? They changed Emma’s music! Er… I don’t get it! 2K games – don’t worry about that!

OH SNAP! Emma defeats Mickie James! Maybe the music change was worth it! Emma started the women’s revolution! I know! We learn something new every day! Poor Mickie, maybe she needs to find a new love interest or something…  back in the day she wanted to get her scissors on with Trish… god dayuuuum!

I am quite shocked that they are running John Cena Vs Roman Reigns at the No Mercy joint… I mean, it has big BIG WrestleMania written all over it… even Mike Cole said so!

John Cena just says he has no Fs to give! Well nor do I Cena! Join the club!

Er… Double R.. rubbing it in about retiring the Undertaker! I respect it but don’t do that!

Cena just called Reigns a ‘Corporate created John Cena bootleg!’ Yo keep me outta this!

Cena is killing Reigns on how to cut a promo! Reigns is now going for low blow techniques on the mic! Reigns is recovering though!!! I think they have thrown the script away here!

“I’m still here because you can’t do your job!” Damn Reigns!!! HOLY SMOKES! I feel bad for you… I really do! The likes of CM P**k and The Rock have struggled against Cena’s lyrical sword!

Trust me – the IWC are gonna be partying hard with those memes this week!

Elias Samson is the ‘Elvis’ of the WWE? So does that mean he’s gonna dead on the toilet?

GRANT BODY-P!

You done it now Elias –  you provoked Jerry Lawler! I hope Lawler doesn’t send for his singlet…you know what happened last time!

What is this nonsense? Pelvis Wesley? Southpaw Regional Wrestling? GETTHEF**KOUTTAHERE! Put on Alexa and Sasha sexy @$$! Oh lawwwd…

Let me get my mint & chocolate chip ice cream y’all – I wanna see Sasha brukk up Alexa blodclart all over again!

You see – Alexa & Sasha don’t like each other in real life – they should apply this in the storylines! Look how successful the feud between Edge & Matt Hardy was, or HBK Vs Bret Hart! That added intensity! Right now I’m not feeling that with Alexa & Sasha…

OH SNAP! Alexa Bliss – NEW WORLD WRESTLING FEDERATION WOMEN’S CHAMPION! Nia Jax congratulates her – OH SNAP! Nia just put her down on some Batista sh!t – BLAOW! YES!!! I smell Triple Threat… she took out Sasha as well!

BRAVO RAW! I made it through the three hours! I yawned here and there but yes! Y’all came through! Double R & Cena though… good lord! That’s what we like – throw away the robotics – keep it 100 on the mic!

JAMMS

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Monday Night Raw #1264, August 21, 2017!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

 

HOLY SMOKES!!! I have watched Brock Lesnar since he broke in 2002… I have never, EVER seen him get f**ked up like that, not even from (in my mind) his most fierce rival – the don of dons – The Undertaker! This, plus Kevin Owens killer line “Where were you? YOU FALL OFF BUILDINGS!” 5 title changes (unlucky Naomi, no shame in losing to Natalya – she is apart of one of the greatest wrestling families ever) Summerslam was wild yo!

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1264! ALEXA BLISS LOST HER TITLE! To quote that Simpsons kid – Ha-haaa!

Steph Raw

I’m not sure if I have the energy to get through the three hours… but Kurt says he has a big announcement… superstar shake up maybe as many of you dirt sheet readers keep bangin on about?

Brock kicks off the show! He will be pacing up and down while Paul be like ‘I told you so!’

The crowd be chanting SUPLEX CITY while you muthaf***az on the internet are complaining about Brock’s scheduled dates! WHO IS THE PROBLEM?

Certainly not this guy – BRAUUUUUUUUUUUN!!! This guy, THIS GUY!!! He just f**ked up Brock AGAIN!!! HOLY SMOKES! 2 thunderous powerslams!!! GOOD GAWD ALMIGHTY!

Enzo Amore Vs Big Cass in a Brooklyn Street Fight? Where Ol’ Dirty at?

AH LIE! Big Cass injured??!!!!! Nah gotta be a work surely? Let me see the replay! Holy smokes!!! Maybe he did mash-up his leg!

Er.. how did Emma change the women’s revolution? What did she doooooooo? Oh yeah – teefing out of walmart! Oh yeah that really changed the game!

GRANT BODY-P!

Nia Jax is gonna killllllll Emma! She says #GiveEmmaCPR? Well THE GRANT SAYS #GiveEmmaSomeC-

OH MY GOD THAT IS ENOUGH!!!

Yes Elias – Brooklyn is a Hip Hop borough – no one wants to hear your country music garbage!

Oh snap! While Elias sason & R-Truth was fighting…

 1h1 hour ago

“like the Terminator, I’ll be back”   Asuka suffers collarbone injury at NXT TakeOver  

THE GRANT SAYS: Sounds like someone needs a massage on her collarbone… I’LL HELP…

GRANT BODY-P!

Here we go! John Cena is the surprise! Remember he is a free agent! He can go on any show! Sorry guys – you don’t get Bobby Roode just yet you fools!

UH-OH!!!! DOUBLE R! You don’t suppose they are gonna start this rivalry now?????

I don’t know what the crowd are chanting right now!

Oh I know now – they chanting UN-DER-TAY-KER!

Oh snap – Double R & John Cena were gonna come to blows and then that idiot Miz just had to ruin the runnings!

What the rarse does Bo Dallas have on???? You ain’t a pimp muthaf***a!

So let me get this right so I can understand this – Booing Cena & Reigns affects The Miz? I dunno – he sounds like a b!tch if you ask me!

Samoa Joe has come to join the party! UH-OH! JOE! JOE! JOE! JOE!

Crowd chanting YOU BOTH SUCK! Directed at Cena & Reigns! Oh dear! What did these guys doooooooo?!!!!!

I just remembered to follow that Kayla Braxton chick on the twitter – God dayuuuuuum – I saw her on Summerslams… Vincent Kennedy knows where all the kriss gyal are at!

Kayla Braxtons

DAYYUUUUUM KAYLA!!! You’re making me HIGGHHHHHHH!!! Baby baby baby – BABY!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

Jason Jordan wants to test Finn Balor??? This kid is ambitious isn’t he?

I saw some stupidness on WWE’s YouTube earlier, talking about – what name should Rollins & Ambrose call themselves? THEY ARE THE SHIELD YOU DUMMY!

The Shield Vs  The Hardy Boyz? YES PLEASE!

A great contest between the two teams with the new tag champs victorious! The Hardys continue to lose… how long before they finally become ‘broken’?

OFFICIAL – BROCK LESNAR Vs BRAUN STROWMAN – WORLD WRESTLING FEDERATION TITLE AT NO MERCY! Grant & Leva

I am so glad Sasha girl is the champion… one guy in the STC pointed out that Alexa Bliss got thighs… ok she got it going on but I don’t think she can hold a candle to the likes of Becky Lynch, Charlotte and especially not Nia Jax when it comes to thighs!

Mike Cole says Finn Balor was the only dude to stand up to Bray Wyatt’s deranged fighting style – er – hello??? Undertaker???? WrestleMania 31?????

Great effort by a guy I am proud to call ‘Double J’! Never that other idiot who owns the Global Farce Wrestling!

Now that Double R & Cena have mastered the art of not giving a f**k of how the crowd feels, they defeated the annoying Miz and the powerful Samoa Joe. Let the complaining on the internet begin I guess!

 

JAMMS

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Monday Night Raw #1167, October 5, 2015!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

It’s that time of the month people! and I don’t mean wrestling fans on their period!

GRANT BODY – P!

Not only have we gotta save the tables, but we gotta save the t!tt!£$ as well! Those things are good to us! And we are gonna celebrate t!TT!£$ this week on this week’s blog, because breast cancer is a serious thing. So if you’re a feminist, or a 40-year-old virgin who cums at the sight of nipples, or a battyman in love with CM Princess Peach B!tch, THIS BLOG IS NOT FOR YOU!!!

RAW #1167! HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZMike Cole says we are in for a hell of a show… I hope he means no ‘repeat’ matches! Big Show seems to be alright as well, after the beating he took at MSG by BRRROOCCCK LESSSNARR who has kicked off RAW!

Oh no not the WrestleMania XXX nightmare…. I can’t relive that again and again! That’s like Bruce Lee when he had to fight that demon in his life!

Then the Summerslam ‘screwjob’… I mean, I’m Undertaker through and through and I will support him 100%… Heyman says it’s not a prediction, it’s a spoiler, One will walk out of the cell the victor, and the other will not walk out at all.. Oh well Brock… you are a beast… but Undertaker becomes a DEMON in that cell!

Oh what is the Big Slow doing out here? WORD? He’s gonna put his hand out and say Brock is the DON?!!!

What an idiot… Big Show – you are a Big Fool! Another suplex and an F-5 – BLAOW!!!! Now go to your room!

OFFICIAL – Roman Reigns fights Bray Wyatt in the Cell! YES! Finally WWE have got it right. two extremely personal rivalries that has gone too far that they have to send for the cell. That’s how it should be!

LADIES! Roman Reigns is in the ring! 6 man tag team action! Come on girls rub on your t!TT!£$!

467e0753-349a-4b1a-bddb-394b222c5d35That’s what’s up – Be Proud of your t!TT!£$!!! Roman Reigns is sure to win!

YES!!! Because you women rubbed yout t!TT!£$… nipples hard and all… The combined might of Reigns, Ambrose and Orton mash-up the Wyatt bwoy dem!

Don’t tell me Neville is gonna fight Stardust… oh thank goodness it’s Sheamus!

Sheamus talking too much sh!t, bad man move in silence… Neville starts kicking Sheamus all over the ring…and… the match dun already? You know what that was? that was Neville, Sheamus and Barrett (who was at commentary) basically saying ‘Yes sir’ to Mr McMahon’s register just to say they were present…

Oh no!!! It’s my hero! Bi-Polar Kane!!! Look at him! his leg is ‘mash up’!!! Seth is fed up of the mind games!!! The joke is that Seth shows so much hatred against Corporate Kane… and Kane acting like he’s the good Samaritan!

Ooh Stephanie is out here – if anyone supports breast cancer more than anybody, even me, it’s Stephanie! But check it – if the Demon Kane does not defeat Seth Rollins for the title at the PPV, then Corporate Kane is out of a job…. hmmmm…. logic says I support Seth Rollins here! As I was saying… let’s honor Stephanie’s t!TT!£$… even though they are a bit on the false side…

Stephanie tittiesNatalya back on di telly! Her opponent… the UNGRATEFUL BRAT – Paige! Hopefully she will lose again… come on Natalya, show Paige how to do it! You come from the Hart Dungeon – you cannot let this little b!tch win!

Look at Natalya throwing those bows! Come on girl! mash her up!!!

It’s NEVER your house b!tch! Do you pay the rent – NO – Shut the f**k up!

GRANT BODY – P!

THAT’S IT NATALYA! Twist the b!tch up in that submission Razor Ramon used to do!

I swear down I hate when Paige even speaks now… so unattractive… I don’t get it guys – how is this woman so appealing? seriously guys, you got 30 seconds to convince me…WWE2K16 GRANT BODY -P!

Natalya applies the sharpshooter! But Paige made it to the ropes… SH!T!

Natalya got her again!! YES!!! THE B!TCH TAPPED OUT! GET THE F**K OUTTA HERE PAIGE!

The rest of Raw could be wack… Naomi may not appear… I don’t care – NATALYA BEAT PAIGE! Justice is finally restored!

Ever wondered why I didn’t write about the Lucha/Ryback/Kevin Owens match/segment? Because it wasn’t worth talking about…

Damn who p!$$£d Stephanie off? Maybe she found the pic of her ‘t!TT!£$’ exposed on the internet… IT WASN’T ME! I put up a nice picture of her! Even The New Day are confused… they thought she liked em! Maybe she does! I dunno…she mentioned nothing about tables so I suppose she supports the cause… #SaveTheTables

http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/save-the-tables

URRRRGHHHH This is tiresome… can’t this be on a segment after RAW live? I mean, It’s all good for Cena to be the spokesperson of this breast cancer sh!t and bigging up the breast cancer survivors… I have an idea, while Cena is doing that, let’s throw up another good ol’ t!TTy picture…

Torrie-Wilson-bikiniAAAH SH!T – they got Roman Reigns being a spokesperson too? THERE YOU GO GUYS! You can hate him now… but he won’t stop now!

For real – we just gonna have this match now? Corporate Kane & Seth Rollins vs The Dudley Boys?

HOLD UP – Someone is tuning into RAW this week…

If you’re going to give money to a company that claims to raise money for finding a cure for cancer, please do someresearch.Komen is a scam

I tend to believe him… but it’s like yo… why is he so concerned?

Anyway back to this – Uh-oh  – the Dudleys sent for the tables…. what must The New Day be thinking???

IT’S KAAAANE!!!! AAAAH SH!T! But the Dudleys stand their ground! They remember what Kane did to them at SmackDown… 3D!!! – BLAOW!!! Kane laid out! So before Seth took foot and run… the fool taunts Kane doesn’t he? Now I’ve watched this wrestling sh!t a long time, and I know that if Kane or Undertaker are laid out on the canvas… you NEVER stand over them… they WILL crab you by your neck from a floored position, then CHOKESLAM – BLAOW!! right through the table!

The New Day must be crying in the car at this time… guys – you may not have saved that table.. but you can save the t!TT!£$… I know you wanna save Team BAD’s t!TT!£$… SO DO I!!! You guys save Tamina and Sasha… but Naomi – she’s ALL MINE!

TEAM BAD 2These three… you don’t want to know what’s going through the mind of the Infamous Informer… GRANT BODY – P!

Imagine if Team BAD defeats the Bellas as well… I’d love to hail RAW as the best ever! But obviously I cannot do that…

WHOA!!!! Now when Brie drops the Danny Bryan kicks, the Boston crowd chant NO! NO! NO!

YES!!!! TEAM BAD show the Bellas how to do it! I can now go to bed happy… but there is still half an hour at best of this sh!t…

A wha de raaaaar??? Summer Rae with a tribute to the Super Athlete Rusev??? Where is this going?

BACKSIDE??!!!! NO! Summer going on her crusty knees? What is she gonna ask him – will you let me suck your c-

GRANT BODY-P!!!!

I guessed wrong! But marriage??? She calls him Ru-Ru! She says he can walk out of WrestleMania 32 as the World Wrestling Federation Champion???? WHOA!!!!

HE SAID YES!!!! BACKSIDE!!! Mr & Mrs Bulgarian Brute???

But not yet???? He says he gotta be the champion FIRST! Good thinking there Rusev! Sounds a reasonable deal to me… because if he wins, he can pay for the wedding! Rusev has his head screwed on!

To take your mind off that storyline… lets celebrate some more t!TT!£$… Lana where you at girl?

The crowd is like “John Cena SUUUUUUCKS!” Oh dear!

Who’s the opponent this week? They making a big deal of it this week, like there’s a surprise lurking…

Dolph Ziggler? Yes the match will be good but quite frankly, I’m not interested…

OH SNAP!!! THE NEW DAY GOT HIM!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

BIG E is gonna take him!!!! COME ON BIG E!!!!!

BIG E is straight dominating this match!!! Byron Saxton is right – underneath all that comedy, all that ‘obnoxious’ behavior, BIG E was a former NXT Champion, Former Intercontinental Champion… so BIG E can do this!

Imagine that – New Day with Tag Team and the US Title? similar to The Shield? Anyhow they win… Team BAD are in trouble… you know The New Day love to mess around with Team BAD… I WOULD!

OH NO! The New Day got caught trying to teef! Damnit…. Cena won, but The New Day continuing the assault, that fool Ziggler comes out – BUT YO – Ziggler super kicks Cena accidentally! It’s becoming obvious from here, considering certain rumors… Ziggler gonna be that dude to defeat Cena… ain’t that a b!tch… Damn The New Day mashed up Cena, Ziggler and the Dudley Boys???!!!! Xavier mashed up the trombone effect! But it doesn’t matter! THEY KILLED IT!!!

Now guys, let’s go out and nurture and caress and appreciate those t!TT!£$! Let’s make Dean Ambrose proud!

GRANT BODY – P!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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Monday Night Raw #1141, April 6, 2015!!!

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The Infamous Informer

Last night I cried Tears Of Joy, What did I do to deserve this?

Before I let the outrageous Grant Body-P through, as Michael Grant, The Man in the Purple Suit has to give a shout out to the Lionz Den massive down in London…they showed me love out there I showed them love back… all these years of my moms talking about London guys hating Wolverhampton guys, maybe that was back then… these guys settle differences on Tekken! And what an epic tournament it was… trust me when I say I am a tired, flued up man after that, plus Wrestlemania last week… yet I’m still gonna watch Raw live plus the interview with Jericho & Cena? I got my survival kit here… so let’s DO THIS!!!

I’m the Infamous Informer, and I have NO sympathy, NO compassion, NO remorse…welcome to the RAW After RAW After Big BIG WrestleMania! HOL’DAT BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZBig Show looks proud of himself doesn’t he??? Standing there by the André the Giant trophy….damn the crowd are hating on Rollins! Y’all was cheering on the kid when he cashed his cheque!

Enough of the chatter Big Show & Rollins, Randall has to be the #1 contender surely? people still chatting about the RKO that hit BLAOW!!!! Around the world!!!

So Glenn is running the show while Triple & Steph are f**k!n??? Ryback, Randall, and Roman all gotta fight twice before a #1 contender is determined while Seth sits on his @$$??? If I was Seth, I’d be prepared to lose that title before Brock come back from suspension…not that it makes any difference anyway – his @$$ still gonna get popped!

Big ups to STC’s James Patrick Park Jr. In attendance this week on RAW!

Glenn still proving he still has a bit of ‘Kane’ left in him, winning means nuthin to him… Kane is about f**k!n up people… and he nearly did that to Randall in their match!

Oh dear… is Mike Cole still sipping food through a straw in the hospital? Bryon Saxton, Booker-T and Jay-Bee in effect…

WOW AJ Lee… you left the game and you not even 30 yet??? I suppose love conquers all…she gotta stand by her man after all! I’m tempted to cuss Philip… but NO. I’m not going there. You would want your wife to support you??? That’s part of the plan when you join in holy matrimony! Let’s celebrate AJ’s run here.

OH SNAP!!! Glenn got Neville fighting Rollins???? Damn Glenn is not f**k!n about!!! I don’t expect Neville to win, but suppose he does? It would be huge!!!!

But it’s a case of #WhoeverLosesIWin… because guaranteed muthaf***az will be complaining about Neville coming from NXT and getting ‘buried’…. or if Neville won they would complain about Seth looking weak, and Neville suddenly getting a push… but no doubt, Neville took it to him!

Word is that Rusev has put in his rematch clause for Extreme Rules…. Yes…. now for the true match I wanna see between him & Cena… I wanna see brutality B!ATCH!!!!

Wow… Cena thinks he still runs the place, but he must have matured… he hasn’t pimped out the title… He knows G-Unit aren’t carrying the swing no more!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Next boxer for Cena’s US Title… Dean Ambrose tried to test him and came so close… this week it’s Stardust…let’s be real – it’s WWE2K15 Cena mode brought to life!!!

Notice – they acknowledge the amount of times Ric Flair N!&&@ has won the US title – 6 times… just do the science behind that…

YOOOOO!!!! That DDT by Stardust was nasty bredrin! You saw how Cena dropped on his head top??? JEEZ!

Consider that springboard stunner a new move for John Cena…. 5 move memes burnt to the ground!!!! Give it up for Cena… Rise above hate!!!

Bella Twins stepping to the stage next…. YES!!!! This is my favourite part y’all already know!

People – we gotta move on! Out with the AJ, in with the Paige & Naomi! Now the question remains…will the crowd start chanting AJ Lee on some trolling sh!t? That would be f**ked up….and you know what? When AJ was there, they chanted for somebody else…. you see? tell em Busta…

Y’all don’t appreciate sh!t!!!! GRANT BODY – P!!!!

It’s gonna be interesting how the New Day are gonna respond by this negative energy… now it’s been acknowledged that the crowd ain’t feeling em… Kofi & Big E tryna keep up the positivity, Xavier Woods however… seems like he wants to go militant….

…and it doesn’t help when the Lucha Dragons messed up the New Day…. You know what the New Day needs? The new Kendrick Lamar album… they will get that positivity back!

Kendrick Lamar To Pimp A Butterfly

My dude Roman Reigns coming down the stairs!!!! Just don’t act bright or you will get pushed back in your seat!

Roman can take lick though bwoy! My advice to him? Wrestlers are gonna clock on to his superman fighting style… look w’happen to Cena – No one falls for that sh!t no more!!! Roman you gonna have to change up a lil bit!!!

Yo what’s wrong with this picture? 4 women running up on Glenn asking for a Battle Royal on some

The Man In The Purple Suit (left) & STC member Kuran King (right)

#GiveDivasAChance sh!t??? Glenn is all sweated up, Summer Rae wiping herself on him?? Remember back in the days? When Women used to run for their lives from this guy? If they got caught they got tombstoned??? Suddenly ‘The Way We Were’ song springs to mind…

Who the f**k is Bray Wyatt talking to now?? After he get buss arse by Undertaker at WrestleMania (which I knew was gonna happen) he’s started his cryptic sh!t again… and ends it with ‘Do I Have Your Attention Now?’ Right jabronies don’t even think about it – put your d!ck away if you managed to find it past your beer bellies – NO IT’S NOT HIM he’s talking to… he’s in UFC now durrrrr!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

So w’happen, Sheamus turn bully now? Claims there’s not enough big guys in the house? Obviously Mark Henry thinks he’s outta order and bright – induct this stupid ginger mohawk looking fool into the Hall Of Pain!

Only that Sheamus kicked down Mark Henry and said ‘that ain’t happening’!!!

So they changed up Sheamus music now? Well guys, you’re the ones to blame – YOU thought his character went stale, YOU wanted him to turn evil, now he has, so stop your noise!

Finally Damien Sandow faces the Miz in a wrestling contest… come on Sandow… show this muthaf***a manners!!!

Damn Sandow is going in! Rights! Lefts! knees to the head top!

HEY TEEEEEF!!!! Miz grabbed the tights!!!! Don’t worry Sandow… Extreme Rules is the end of April… I’m sure you can use weapon to disfigure his money-maker!

Ryback, Randall & Reigns fighting… look here now, the Authority wants to cause trouble… it’s nice to see Ryback back in that main event picture…

OH SNAP!!!! Roman Reigns flew over top ropes like his name was The Undertaker!!! Is who tell the Authority to cause trouble???

The Big Show! Grabbed Roman Reigns! PPPPPPPPPP!!! Punched through school buses!!! Ryback fighting the J&J Jabronies only to RKO’d by Randall – BLAOW!!! Randall’s going to Extreme Rules! Seth don’t like that sh!t – Curb stomp to Randall – BLAOW!!!

Well one may think – Randall beat him at WrestleMania, that means he can beat him again! Er yeah… but I think Seth gonna be one of those people who is gonna be so TEEF with the belt, you gonna wish for BRRRRROCCCK to come back, take the title and GONE!!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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Monday Night Raw #1133, February 9, 2015!!!

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The Infamous Informer

I just wanna take this time to thank Gangrel in an exclusive interview this past weekend. The guy is a don, real down to earth… and he’s STILL GOT IT!!! If anything, his fighting skills have improved! Big ups to PWL for such an EPIC show. You guys are killing it for the 2015!!!!

Look out for the exclusive interview on BDSIR NETWORK STC From The UK This Weekend!

Now lets turn our attention to these jabronies who say they won’t watch WWE but still tune in like the fools that they are!

Jamaican Jerk Pot Noodle in hand…Ani James on babestation. let’s do this!! RAW #1133!!! HOL’ DAT – BLAOW!!!

wwf-propa-tingzOk Roman Reigns is gonna speak…. take it easy on the kid…. like you could do better b!atch!

Haha Danny is truly killing me this week! First Total Divas now this! He says when it comes to looks he and Reigns are even… Even Reigns had to laugh! Oh no what’s the Authority doing here??? What’s up Stephanie baby girl!

Stephanie you fine but what sort of stupidness are you talking??? How are you gonna cuss Danny for putting Kane in a casket – B!TCH – you booked the match in the first place you dumb rarse! That’s the idea fool! Even Danny said that’s nothing compared to what Triple did (referring to having sex with a corpse named Katie Vick)… Stephanie – no one is exempt –

Kane & Big Show team up? Damn are we in the year 2005/06???? I wished it was that year to be honest!!! I’ve noticed that on the WWE Network for Free this month (for me that is) I watch more matches from the Ruthless Aggression era. So under appreciated….

I didn’t realise Triple Teef and Stephanie were at ringside – TEEEEEEEEF!!! They don’t care for disqualifications! They wanted Big Show & Kane to brukk Reigns & Danny up…

Oh hang on – that’s the REAL PLAN – to have Danny & Reigns implode… Danny accidentally kicked Reigns in his ‘money maker’ so to speak… and Triple & Steph like it! Now they say they gotta fight again… this time against the whole authority (J&J, Big Show, Kane, Rollins)… TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!!!!

Oh wait a minute… didn’t Triple call Sting out to answer the Fast Lane request???? Keep that in mind people!

WHAT? Another DQ? Seth Rollins you are a PU$$Y! can’t handle Ryback so your pu$$yclart friends have to come in and teef… Randall where you at fool?

Sheamus is looking to return to the dance!!!! That’s what’s up!!!!!

Now it’s about Paige Vs Brie Bella… come on Brie!!!! Where’s Nikki at? You two got the spray cans again? LET’S DO THIS!

Great wrestling skills by Brie! Figure 4 Leg lock on the head of Paige! Danny taught you well! So I guess Danny was shooting blanks??? (Refer to my Total Divas blog this week!)

Take notes – Paige knocked Brie into Nikki in that contest, took advantage and got the win… I’m calling it now – Brie Vs Nikki for divas title… I’m convinced Brie is staying closer to her ‘enemy’!!!!

rusev-lana-cena

I’m so surprised that the US Title is on the line here… which has already gave me my judgment on this match… I like how they demonstrated the video how Cena took all that beating in over a decade… that ain’t sh!t! Try over TWO decades with the Undertaker… f**k that – what about a career spanning generations in Ric Flair N!&&@!!!

I don’t get it – why is Cena referred to as an old man??? How old is this dude – 37? Ok Triple is in his 40s, The Rock – in his 40s, even CM B!tch @$$ is around the same age as Cena… Goldust in his 40s…Brock Lesnar – in his late 30s – all these guys are STILL KILLIN IT! Shawn Michaels & The Undertaker – were both in their 40s at WrestleMania 25 – they got match of the year…. but John Cena is old????

It’s like Hip Hop – the best artists today are in their 40s… approaching 50 even! To say Cena is ‘too old’ you are as retarded as The Game! Took a shot at Jay-Z in the One Blood track, Yet no one cares about The Game no more…. the war to be a rap legend ended a long time ago fool!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Wait – Bray Wyatt is in the ring… destroy the battyman Ziggler… then start your cryptic sh!t grant-body-pbecause I am mad interested this time…

Mike Cole: Ziggler… his attitude is infectious…

JAY-BEE: I never thought that…

YES JAY-BEE! I don’t wanna shake my @$$! I don’t want spaghetti head top! I love women! BIG UP!!!

They continue the commentary..talking about – Bray Wyatt is so charismatic and has all these followers… I’m telling you this build up to the match with the Don of Dons is blodclart exciting! Dude hasn’t even arrived yet!

YES!!! THAT’S WHAT’S UP!!!! He brukk up Ziggler! That clothesline though – BLAOW!!!! There’s your hero IWC! YES WYATT!

OHHHHH SH!T!!! Brock Lesnar & Paul Heyman are gonna speak their piece like Common/Notorious B.I.G.!!! I dunno, wouldn’t it be better to LOSE the match at Fast Lane??? I keep thinking of the 16 suplexes to Cena’s back bone…

OH SNAP!!! Paul Heyman is on that Bryan Williams sh!t!!!! This sermon is about LYING!!!! Breaking down how Roman Reigns and Danny Bryan are lying through their teeth!

Interesting: mixed crowd response when Heyman asks – is Danny the 1 to beat the 1 in 21-1??? I thought that’s who you’re backing to win??? You fickle fools!!!!

Improving on the New Day’s entrance… it’s awkward to watch them after the issues the BDSIR Network Perfect Plex Radio have with them… and I love these guys… Not to worry, they up against Gold/StarDust and all is not well between them two..

Dayuuum StarDust thought – f**k it – me garne!!!! All because Goldust called him – ‘Cody’… come on weirdos?!!!

MUTHAF**K!!!! that’s how to mark the f**k out!!!! Triple dared to call Sting out… does he know who he’s dealing with???? Turn out the lights! Hear the sound of the crow! Sightings of ‘Sting’ in the crowd! A flash of ‘Sting’ in the ring! Causing Triple to drop on his @$$! Titan tron f**k!n up Triple’s face before replying… I ACCEPT!!! And to think… Sting & the Undertaker could be at WrestleMania 31 but in separate matches…. OH LAWWWD!

triple-sting

Talking of OH LAWWWWD… look at Naomi’s attire! Excuse me for a moment I have a problem in my pants….

GRANT BODY – P!!!

The Usos may have lost the match to Cesaro & Tyson Kidd, but to see their dad Rikishi officially inducted in the Hall of Fame…. none of that sh!t mattered!! Big ups to Rikishi!!! Yes he smashed it! We all loved it, especially when he did it for The Rock… and apart from that and Undertaker throwing dude off the cell… this was my favourite Rikishi moment right here:

I mean, you look at the elements, The Rock, Trish Stratus, Vincent Kennedy then Rikishi…. that sh!t had me rolling for weeks after that!

Dayuuum that Miz is a B!TCH isn’t he! Ordering Mizdow around like that and sh!t… Trust me – the day will come when Mizdow will F**K HIM UP!

…and last time I check, it was Ric Flair N!&&@ who made the figure 4 leg lock famous… not your b!tch @$$ Miz!!!! I feel as though the Infamous Informer of old is returning! You know the guy who cusses the wrestlers and… hold on Bray Wyatt is on!

Talking all this ‘death’ sh!t!!!! Here’s another muthaf***a who doesn’t know who he’s dealing with!!!! I have evidence that Bray Wyatt don’t want it with the Don of Dons!!!

Meanwhile Curtis wants this to trend on his twitter #AxelMania… F**KOUTTAHERE!!!! Dean Ambrose knock some sense into this fool!

Oh sh!t!!!! Now Barrett has BNZ!!! And he shut down Kim Kardashian! Let’s be real – I used to fancy that b!tch until Kanye started f**k!n with her… I wonder what Ric Flair thinks about this???

ric-flair-kardashianShout out to @kingvaughnjr720 for that one!!! She could be simply paying homage! After all she was at WrestleMania 24… the same Wrestlemania where Ric Flair ended his career!

Now thanks to my stupid laptop freezing up and crashing like that I have no idea what happened in the 5 Vs 2 Main event… what I do know is two things: One – I’m not going to WWE.Com to find out, and Two, When I rebooted my system I saw Roman Reigns spear the sh!t out of Danny Bryan… Well it’s a case of ‘Fast Lane’, we have a problem….

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#GWARNYUHBED

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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The Infamous Informer

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Monday Night Raw #1077: January 13, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer

What a week in wrestling last week eh??!!!!

Too Cool & Rikishi have STILL GOT IT.

DDP & Booker T acting a fool before getting caught by Ron Simmons…

Roddy Piper standing up to The Shield.

The entire wrestling world in absolute shock when Jake ‘The Snake’ Roberts music hit and he came through the curtain.

Surely WWE can forgive Dean Ambrose for marking out when Jake threw ‘Damien’ on him???

Mae Young trolling the wrestling fans… “R.I.P. Mae Young….” (I’m still here muthaf***az!!! And I’ll get my ‘puppies’ out one more time if I see another FB status saying that sh!t!)

The WWE Network has now been announced… and THE GRANT SAYS THIS: those who are NOT sending for it DOES NOT have a VALID reason, and is NOT a TRUE WRESTLING FAN. You are no longer entitled to say sh!t when someone becomes WWE Undisputed Champion…Us crazy folk in the UK gotta wait til early 2015!

Anyone would think it was my birthday… OH SNAP!!!!!!

I don’ expect this weeks Raw to top last week… but you’ll never know. RAW #1077! HOLD ‘DAT  – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZIs this how it goes down in the streets??? The Usos Vs Daniel Bry- er I mean Danny Wyatt and Bray Wyatt to jump off the show? I approve this intro!

Shout out to Jerry Lawler who is back in effect this week on commentary! Wearing his old school jacket as well! Shout out to JAY-BEE (JBL) for pointing out that the fans will chant for Daniel Bryan no matter what his personal chess moves are!!!

By Harper & Rowan getting involved and causing a disqualification… is that Bray Wyatt’s way of styling out the fact that he can’t last in the ring more than 5 minutes???? (Shout out to STC’s Anthony Cardenas!!!)

So let me get this right so I can understand this: For every loss/disqualification… Danny Wyatt sacrifices himself to Bray??? He really is the ‘dog’ in Unleashed!!!

2005_unleashed_poster_001

Unleashed Jet LI

Remember the great contest between John Cena & Damien Sandow last October? Well ever since then that has burning Sandow’s soul like Ether and he hasn’t been the same… he couldn’t defeat Cena with his bad arm… now that Cena is 100%…. can he beat him now???

Sandow now has a new super move submission? He realises that he has to step his game up now that there is only one belt!

Hold up – did Cena just use another new move??? WHOA!!! He’s gotta face the wrath of Vincent Kennedy surely!

Meme courtesy of STC member Lee Steadx

Cena wins! Well what did you expect IWC jabronies? He has to gain momentum going into the championship match at the Royal Rumble!!! NOW SHUDDUP!

OH SNAP!! Old School Raw NAH DUN! The New Age Outlaws team up with CM Punk to take on The Shield in a Smackdown rematch??? YEAAAAH BOYEE!!!

Dayum my girl Chilli from TLC is down with the WWE Network??!!! Well from time she’s getting it, What’s your excuse for not getting it you dumb muthaf***az?Chilli

Chilli @officialchilli 9 Jan

I can watch every @WWE PPV ever?.. past n present? WCW n ECW too?? Mannnn gotta get @WWENetwork Feb 24th! Luv my wrestling:)))

RECORD SKIP!!! The Wyatt Brudda (Bray & Danny) Vs The Uso Brudda AGAIN??? In a Steel Cage match? But the sh!t is chained up? And My Hero Kane got the key??? This is basically a tag team mini Hell In A Cell!!!!

YES!!! THE GREATEST THING EVER JUST HAPPENED ON RAW! FINALLY THAT BASTARD ZEB COLTER GOOSE COOK! THE BIG SHOW WITH THE SEAN PRICE PUNCH – PPPPPPPPPPPP!!!! THROUGH SCHOOLBUSES!!!

I loved how JAY-BEE was cussing that Zeb is somebody’s grandfather… Well THE GRANT SAYS that if he has any grandkids… they too should be overjoyed!!! YEAH I SAID IT! Let’s play some SEAN P!!!

WHAAAAT!! You wanted the muthaf***!n Attitude Era back!!! Look here now! New Age Outlaws in effect!!! CM Punk! The Shield! If you’re not down with that, they got two words for ya!!! SUCK IT!!!!

Lillian Garcia – MUTHAF**- That red dress she have on…. I wanna tear it off!!! NO I’M NOT POSTING A LINK OF THAT TUNE – LADY IN RED! We don’t do that over here – this is RePP!N4U! Represent The Real Hip Hop!!!

I find it interesting that JAY-BEE loves pointing out that The Shield took out The Undertaker and he hasn’t been seen since… that’s it Jay-Bee keep stirring the pot.. if I know Undertaker, he’s on some Batman Ninja Stealth sh!t, and will take out The Shield one by one!

Holy – did Roman Reigns just do the DX Suck It chop to the New Age Outlaws??? DISRESPECT!!! And I like Roman Reigns!

RECORD SKIP!!! The New Age Outlaws turned their back give CM Punk??? But why???? TELL ME WHY!!

…..WAIT! I FIGURED IT OUT!!!

Think about it!!! The New Age Outlaws – they are apart of whom? D-Generation X! Who is the founding members of that crew? Shawn Michaels & Triple TEEF! Who has CM Punk being disrespecting lately? TRIPLE TEEF! They are all bredrin! TRIPLE TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!!! Some of you have done the knowledge already.. and I smell it – CM Punk Vs Triple TEEF and WrestleMania XXX???

Hang on – The Funkadactyls Vs AJ Lee & Tamina? That’s 4 of my favourite women! NO! THIS IS NOT RIGHT!!!!BDSIR LAYLA GRANT

AJ Lee – 211 days of WWE Divas Champion!!! GWARN GIRL!

Cameron takes the L… but AJ Lee and Tamina continue to be TEEF! Naomi BEXXX!!!! So hold on… does this mean Naomi could be in line for the Divas title at the Royal Rumble?

WHAAAAAAAAT!!! And to think… that WWE put out a DVD called the Destruction of the Ultimate Warrior, Had several superstars running his clart… and now they induct him in the Hall Of Fame! THAT IS #BESTFORBUSINESS!!!

Ultimate Warrior Hall Of fame

Remember back in the days? When Randall was so TEEF that he even got Kofi Kingston BEX??? Now I see a happy-go-lucky Kingston going to the ring! Come on Kofi!!! Where is that RUTHLESS AGGRESSION! What happened to the guy that took a baseball bat and f**ked up Randall’s car? Went to Madison Square Garden and f**ked Randall up???

OH SNAP!!! KINGSTON MUST HAVE HEARD ME!!! Kofi Kingston just defeated Randall Orton!!!! LAWD HAVE MERCY! Randall talking sh!t about everybody wants to f**k him up…now that means Kofi can actually fight for the title!

UH-OH!!! Now the voices in his head are talking to him! They told him to knock Cena’s dad the f**k out!!! Randall you’ve DONE IT NOW!!! You don’t beat down next man’s family suh like that!!! DISRESPECT! That’s somebody DADDY – FOOL!

OH SNAP!!!! My girl Chilli from TLC just retweeted The Infamous Informer!

Chilli retweeted you

39m:

Rybaxel go sidung!!! You ain’t beating The Rhodes Brudda them! NOW GO TO YOUR ROOM!!!

Yes!!! Bertie is coming out to have a contest with Rey Mysterio! You know what that means! Lillian speaking Spanish!!! I said it before… if a woman is talking Spanish to me while I’m working her pum-pum – my super-sperm will shoot out like a champagne bottle after shaken! FREE AT LAST! FREE AT LAST!!!

Now I understand!!! Bertie mash-up Mysterio arm because he’s Batista’s bredrin!!!! Bertie you are a don but Batista is gonna f**k you up!!!

Big up the New England Patriots!!! They reppin at Raw with the classic WWF Championship Belt!! You know the one that Hulk Hogan, Yokozuna and Bret hart and famously known for holding???

OK MAIN EVENT TIME! THE USO BRUDDA! THE WYATT BRUDDA! STEEL CAGE MATCH! KANE LOCK DE DOOR! LET’S GO!!!

OH SNAP! The Usos! With a double back drop to Bryan from the top rope – BLAOW!!!

UH-OH!!! The Usos win again!!! Does that mean Danny Wyatt is gonna get f**ked up again??

SWITCH!!!! Bray went for the Sister Abigail super move! Danny said – NAH! F**K THAT!!! He kicked Bray all over that damn cage!!! Took off his boiler room attire! Rid himself of the Wyatt name! The Dog turned on his Master!!!

If you want my honest opinion, I think this storyline was meant to go on longer… but WWE must have picked up on this video recently… OBSERVE….

GRANT BODY – P!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GWARNYUHBED

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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