Tag Archives: Brock Lesnar

Monday Night Raw #1273, October 23, 2017!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

IWC fools

It’s gonna hurt me to say this more than it will hurt the man in question… but Aydenn Wardle: Give me your wrestling card. You are not worthy of it. You said (on a J.A.M.M.S. Podcast I might add) that if Shinsuke Nakumura lost to Jinder Mahal at Hell In A Cell, you would hand it in and not watch AJ Styles Vs Shinsuke Nakumura if it happened at WrestleMania 34. But there you are STILL watching, and STILL complaining that while Finn Balor Vs AJ Styles was a great contest (which it was), you said the TLC match itself was garbage. So ok – Strowman & Kane go through announce tables, Kurt dons the Shield gear, The Shield get double chokeslammed through tables, Braun & Kane fight amongst each other, Kane chokeslams Braun off the stage, drops 20 chairs all over him, Braun comes back – pie faces his own team, the team rush him and throw him in the dumpster truck, Kane gets double speared through the barricade, Angle comes back – drops the olympic slam on Cesaro & Sheamus (prior to that he took most of the team to suplex city) then he and The Shield completely destroy The Miz for the win and YOU SAID IT WAS GARBAGE? YOUR CARD. GIVE IT TO ME!

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1273! My apologies to my readers at Cage Amateurs UK: When Virgin Media pull the plug because I didn’t pay those bills, life offline is a bit lonely!

Steph Raw

 Now really and truly, I shouldn’t be watching live because I have a hospital appointment in the morning, (or rather by the time you read this I’ve already been to the hospital) but… Brock Lesnar gonna sign Jinder Mahal’s death warrant- er I mean answer the challenge for the Survivor Series!

But first – KUUUUUUURT!!! I was concerned about him at the PPV, but thank god he’s ok, he may have got put through a table by Strowman, but he’s still standing strong!

Raaaaar! It’s champion Vs champion at the Survivor Series! Plus 5 Vs 5 Tradtional Raw Vs Smackdown mens & womens matches!

Miz thinks Raw is his show? He got BUSS ARSE at the PPV! He’s more like Raw’s B!TCH!

Look at him complaining and sh!t… Kurt needs to tell him to shut the f**k up!

I know the Miz & the Bar was not gonna rush Kurt and brukk him up… thank god for the Shield! That would have been injustice right there!

Oh snap! 6 man jump off right now! The Bar/Miz face The Shield & AJ Styles! Good on this dude – he’s staying on Raw for the Monday too! Give this man MVP of the week please!

Ok guys – as much as I wanna hang around and watch RAW live, as stated above – I gotta fin my bed. I don’t wanna be walking like a zombie to the hospital tomorrow! Don’t worry – your boy is ok, just come off the medication and they are monitoring your favourite daywalker. (Very funny you think I was on medication because I don’t know my wrestling sh!t like you guys…go jerk off over Alexa Bliss…)

GRANT BODY-P!

Ok I’m back… the hospital could have called me to tell me the good news instead of me going clean up there only to be there for 5 minutes… let’s get on with this week’s World Wrestling Federation.

I love a good old ruckus match I do! Bodies everywhere! Camera can’t keep still! I love it! Finishing with a phenomenal forearm to Cesaro’s headcrown – BLOAW! All that technical sh!t is boring – GIVE ME RUCKUS! that’s what The Shield, the Miz, the bar and The Phenomenal One did!

OH NO! IT’S KAAAAAAAANE! Should be no problem for The Shield and AJ… right??????

Is it me or can I hear fans chanting for Roman? Er – dude is sick! Mash up with meningitis and sh!t… now you cheer for him… fickle… that’s why I can’t f**k with you wrestling fans sometimes! You’re worse than a b!tch on her period!

GRANT BODY-P!

Kane has decided to chill with us! I like how they treating his promo treatment – lighting all red, titan tron with flames and sh!t… that’s what I’m talking about!

He says he’s Raw’s original monster! I gotta agree with Kane I’m sorry! I mean yes, Strowman has pushed over ambulances, broken rings, walked out of a truck crash, nearly destroyed Brock Lesnar… but my hero Kane… he impregnated Lita, he tombstoned a priest, he electrocuted Shane’s balls, he buried his own brother alive… he’s been carried to the ring in chains once, and my personal favourite – he set people on fire for joke!

As much as I love Finn Balor, he has no chance against my hero Kane! I mean… he didn’t have to put the demon paint on against AJ Styles… but here, he’s just a man!

Finn Balor! Front drop kick to Kane to the turnbuckles! Set up for the Coup De Grace! But Kane sat right up! NO! Chokeslam off the top ropes! Balor tried to counter but the grip was too much! Chokeslam – BLOAW!

Not going for the cover! Grabs Balor by the neck again – another chokeslam – BLAOW!

NOT A THIRD!!! What did Balor do to deserve this!!! He’s a good man! CHOKESLAM – BLAOW! BACK BRUKK!!!

Emma has another chance to make Asuka see the lights for the first time in her WWE career! I’m telling you now – she needs Dana Brooke by her side again… I don’t know why they split them up in the first place…

Wait a second! Didn’t I watch Elias Samson Vs Jason Jordan already? I don’t need to see this sh!t again… hey WWE – if people missed it they can watch the PPV on the network!

Wait – I take that back – Jason Jordan coming with that ruthless aggression yo! Elias getting charged into the barricades! But Elias had to teef – he found a guitar and lick it over Jordan’s head – BLAOW!

Oh sorry guys – it was the shoulder of Jason Jordan… sorry if I got you excited for a hot minute…

GRANT BODY -P!

Drew Gulak – do not do speeches/pitches again – you sound like one of those idiots from The Apprentice!

Holy smokes Gran Metalik! He’s taken ‘walking the ropes’ to a new level hasn’t he! His athleticism is crazy!!!! He makes Super Crazy look Super Dull!

So Enzo’s crew are called ‘The Zo Train’? Sounds like a male version of the Ho train… oh wait – that IS what it is! I knew something was up with the way Enzo dressed…

GRANT BODY-P!

“The same someone, who barely survived Randy Orton, the same soemone who barely survived Shinsuke Nakumura…” Yes boys and girls, this fool wants to test BRRRROCCCK LESSSNAR! The same dude who took Cena to SUUUUUPLEXXXXX CITTTTTY! The same dude who…(deep breath) broke the Undertaker’s undefeated streak at WrestleMania, The same someone who has conquered Samoa Joe, Braun Strowman, and Goldberg… somebody order a straight jacket for Jinder Mahal NOW!

Look at Brock – he’s laughing! Pacing up and down like –  “a wha dis bwoy gwarn on wid eh?”

“When we think of WWE Champions, we think of Bruno Sammartino, Nagoh Kluh, Macho Man Randy Savage, Ric Flair, Triple H, Shawn Michaels, John Cena, and BRRRROOCCCK LESSSSNAR!!!!”

Er Heyman, what about Stone Cold Steve Austin? The Rock? The UNNNNDERRRTAYYYKERR? DISRESPECT!

I’ve come to the conclusion that Alexa Bliss is UGLY. YEAAAAH I SAID IT! I’m actually taking a good look at her – look at the amount of make up the b!tch got on! She that b!tch that when you put it in you think it’s the best sex ever, your eyes are watering, you are crying out like Lexington Steele, you reach the point of no return, buss your nut, go to sleep, wake up the next day to say good morning to her and JESUS CHRIST – she looks like Sister Abigail and sh!t!

church choir

080915, Atlanta, GA: Marcus Ross (cq) and the Beulahland Bible Church choir of Macon, Ga. perform in the “How Sweet The Sound” regional church choir competition at Philips Arena on September 15, 2008. “I felt like a star on stage,” Ross said.MIKKI K. HARRIS / mkharris@ajc.com

I will agree with the b!tch though, y’all wrestling fans is GAY. You chant ‘This is awesome’ when AJ Styles and Finn Balor stare each other in the face, but when Alexa and Mickie James sexy @$$ is on you sit there contemplating a toilet break…

Speaking of Mickie James – DAYYUUUUUUUUM! How did she get that in those jeans! Look at the high heels! Hold up – kick to the gut – tornado DDT in those heels! BLAOW! YES! Alexa Bliss deserved that sh!t!GRANT WWDJC2

Ok – Alicia Fox Vs Bayley vs Sasha – winner gets to be team captain for the women’s RAW team – Well The Grant Says – why is this even a question? Sasha is THE BOSS – she is a leader – not a follower! This match should not be taking place!

Actually I would love Alicia to be the captain – she is giving me joke ringing the bell like that! This ain’t Game of Thrones Alicia?!

OH SH!T!!! Alicia IS EL CAPITAIN!!! This is gonna be great! I LIKE THIS!

Hold up – Shane McMahon and the Smackdown brand? they think they are The Shield now coming down the stairs? They can’t be here???!!! What is this!

OH SNAP! UNDER SIEGE????!!! They brukk up the Titus Brand!

I can see Mr Strong Style there! He can take on the whole Raw Roster if he wanted to!

WROOOOOOY!!! THE LADIES ARE GOING AT IT! YES! PULL EACH OTHER’S WEAVE OUT!

Dean Ambrose said The Shield can take on the world – well how about half the Smackdown roster? Steel chairs in hand! Where’s Jim Ross when you need him?!

OH MY GOD THEY GOT KURT!!!!! LEAVE HIM ALONE!!! HE’S INNOCENT!

HOLY SMOKES!!! You know Kurt ain’t gonna take this lying down! He’s gonna call his squad… and if he brings Kane and Strowman…. all I’m saying is – DON’T HURT MY NAOMI! OR ELSE!!!!

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Monday Night Raw #1264, August 21, 2017!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

 

HOLY SMOKES!!! I have watched Brock Lesnar since he broke in 2002… I have never, EVER seen him get f**ked up like that, not even from (in my mind) his most fierce rival – the don of dons – The Undertaker! This, plus Kevin Owens killer line “Where were you? YOU FALL OFF BUILDINGS!” 5 title changes (unlucky Naomi, no shame in losing to Natalya – she is apart of one of the greatest wrestling families ever) Summerslam was wild yo!

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1264! ALEXA BLISS LOST HER TITLE! To quote that Simpsons kid – Ha-haaa!

Steph Raw

I’m not sure if I have the energy to get through the three hours… but Kurt says he has a big announcement… superstar shake up maybe as many of you dirt sheet readers keep bangin on about?

Brock kicks off the show! He will be pacing up and down while Paul be like ‘I told you so!’

The crowd be chanting SUPLEX CITY while you muthaf***az on the internet are complaining about Brock’s scheduled dates! WHO IS THE PROBLEM?

Certainly not this guy – BRAUUUUUUUUUUUN!!! This guy, THIS GUY!!! He just f**ked up Brock AGAIN!!! HOLY SMOKES! 2 thunderous powerslams!!! GOOD GAWD ALMIGHTY!

Enzo Amore Vs Big Cass in a Brooklyn Street Fight? Where Ol’ Dirty at?

AH LIE! Big Cass injured??!!!!! Nah gotta be a work surely? Let me see the replay! Holy smokes!!! Maybe he did mash-up his leg!

Er.. how did Emma change the women’s revolution? What did she doooooooo? Oh yeah – teefing out of walmart! Oh yeah that really changed the game!

GRANT BODY-P!

Nia Jax is gonna killllllll Emma! She says #GiveEmmaCPR? Well THE GRANT SAYS #GiveEmmaSomeC-

OH MY GOD THAT IS ENOUGH!!!

Yes Elias – Brooklyn is a Hip Hop borough – no one wants to hear your country music garbage!

Oh snap! While Elias sason & R-Truth was fighting…

 1h1 hour ago

“like the Terminator, I’ll be back”   Asuka suffers collarbone injury at NXT TakeOver  

THE GRANT SAYS: Sounds like someone needs a massage on her collarbone… I’LL HELP…

GRANT BODY-P!

Here we go! John Cena is the surprise! Remember he is a free agent! He can go on any show! Sorry guys – you don’t get Bobby Roode just yet you fools!

UH-OH!!!! DOUBLE R! You don’t suppose they are gonna start this rivalry now?????

I don’t know what the crowd are chanting right now!

Oh I know now – they chanting UN-DER-TAY-KER!

Oh snap – Double R & John Cena were gonna come to blows and then that idiot Miz just had to ruin the runnings!

What the rarse does Bo Dallas have on???? You ain’t a pimp muthaf***a!

So let me get this right so I can understand this – Booing Cena & Reigns affects The Miz? I dunno – he sounds like a b!tch if you ask me!

Samoa Joe has come to join the party! UH-OH! JOE! JOE! JOE! JOE!

Crowd chanting YOU BOTH SUCK! Directed at Cena & Reigns! Oh dear! What did these guys doooooooo?!!!!!

I just remembered to follow that Kayla Braxton chick on the twitter – God dayuuuuuum – I saw her on Summerslams… Vincent Kennedy knows where all the kriss gyal are at!

Kayla Braxtons

DAYYUUUUUM KAYLA!!! You’re making me HIGGHHHHHHH!!! Baby baby baby – BABY!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

Jason Jordan wants to test Finn Balor??? This kid is ambitious isn’t he?

I saw some stupidness on WWE’s YouTube earlier, talking about – what name should Rollins & Ambrose call themselves? THEY ARE THE SHIELD YOU DUMMY!

The Shield Vs  The Hardy Boyz? YES PLEASE!

A great contest between the two teams with the new tag champs victorious! The Hardys continue to lose… how long before they finally become ‘broken’?

OFFICIAL – BROCK LESNAR Vs BRAUN STROWMAN – WORLD WRESTLING FEDERATION TITLE AT NO MERCY! Grant & Leva

I am so glad Sasha girl is the champion… one guy in the STC pointed out that Alexa Bliss got thighs… ok she got it going on but I don’t think she can hold a candle to the likes of Becky Lynch, Charlotte and especially not Nia Jax when it comes to thighs!

Mike Cole says Finn Balor was the only dude to stand up to Bray Wyatt’s deranged fighting style – er – hello??? Undertaker???? WrestleMania 31?????

Great effort by a guy I am proud to call ‘Double J’! Never that other idiot who owns the Global Farce Wrestling!

Now that Double R & Cena have mastered the art of not giving a f**k of how the crowd feels, they defeated the annoying Miz and the powerful Samoa Joe. Let the complaining on the internet begin I guess!

 

JAMMS

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Monday Night Raw #1207, July 11, 2016!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

brockvorton

Well then! Brock Lesnar mash-up the dude Mark Hunt, Portugal won the Euro 2016, and muthaf***az are complaining about this Summerslam match up. I thought you guys wanted this match??? Do you want a refund like that idiot who complained because Danny Bryan was injured? You never heard the story? Check this out…

http://www.nbcphiladelphia.com/news/business/NBC10-Responds-WWE-Refund_Philadelphia-386306511.html

THE GRANT SAYS THIS: This muthaf***a hasn’t had any pu$$y in all his life! And is not likely to get any pu$$y any time soon! He gonna die and be in a box….a VIRGIN!

GRANT BODY-P!

In other news,  just remind me to put up a nice picture of that Miesha Tate lady…. I feel bad for her because she lost her title… but god damn – GOD DAMN!!!!!

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RAW #1207! I’m gonna put on my purple suit, god fist combo no pu$$y getting basement jabronies online, then I’m gonna BEAT UP JOHN CENA!

WWF PROPA TINGZ

OH NO! VINCENT KENNEDY IS ON THIS WEEK! We gonna see the Vincent Kennedy walk! He’s gonna say sh!t like “In this very ring…” and “I’m Vince McMahon damnit!” If I was Shane and Steph, I would hide behind the couch!!!!

This is gonna jump off with the battle royal! Winner gets to fight The Miz at the Battleground… because he’s The Miz… and he’s a B!TCH!!!

Wait a sec – did I just see Bob Backlund? YES I DID SEE Bob Backlund! Darren Young is out there… but I’m not watching him too much… he might think I want something….

GRANT BODY-P!

Yes Miz I agree with you – Maryse is beautiful but she doesn’t get my d!ck hard – SORRY!

Darren Young has won the sh!t! By eliminating NOBODY!!!!! I suppose he was the last man in the ring…. and the crowd are down with Darren Young! But I bet Darren Young wants to get down with the crowd!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

UH-OH!! The Rollins Report???? He got exclusive footage of Roman Reigns disrespecting the fans? I GOTTA SEE THIS!!! As a journalist, my ears and eyes will be razor-sharp like The RZA!

Plus! On the Battleground Highlight Reel… Jericho talks to Randall! Oh boy… that should be good!

So they remixed Wack Ryder’s music… wicked wow…. sense my sarcasm???? PENNY TAUGHT ME!

PENNY

Excellent work Sheamus! You mash-up Batty Ryder! Ten the super athlete put him in the accolade super move and accepts Ryder’s challenge for the US Championship! in which, Batty Ryder will lose again! This time Rusev… BREAK HIS BACK like your name is Bolo Yeung!

Ok we gonna see the footage!!!! What did Roman Reigns do? Was he that guy? Was he doing drugs? Did he cheat on his wife and find himself in a sex tape? Or was it that WrestleMania 31 footage when he pushed a fan for being all up in his grill?

Typical Seth Rollins! Editing the Roman Reigns interviews he had with Mike Cole! GET OUTTA HERE!!!! Edge & Christian did the same sh!t on their show that reeks of awesomeness! Only that I struggled to laugh at most of their sketches…

GRANT BODY-P!

Both Deano and Seth just delivered killer promos!!! They are doing a superb job of filling the void that is Roman Reigns!

Seth wants that one on one jump off so bad – he got it! But he wants to do it on his terms… dude – YOU STILL GON’ LOSE!!!

Still not amused that the Zayn Vs Owens jump off is a single match at Battleground… where is the muthaf**k!n stipulation WWE? They already had a single match in NXT! I don’t wanna see that sh!t again???? If you gonna end the feud… END IT RIGHT!

OH SNAP! VINCENT KENNEDY IS HERE! He’s gonna name the new ‘commissioner’ of Smackdown when it jumps off next week! NO – WRESTLING FANS – IT’S SOMEBODY ‘NEW’… someone who hasn’t run the show before! It’s a new era FOOL!

OH NO! John Cena is ‘practicing’ at the ESPY show? What sort of show is that??? Enzo & Cass are gonna get brukk up! Then the Bullet Club are gonna take a plane, fly down to wherever this show is…. and then…………….er….then er……………………………er…………………………………………………………………………….. BEAT UP JOHN CENA!!!!!!

Anytime these social idiots are on, that’s the time I disappear… so I’ll be back, after… I get this ice cream, pay some bills, and BEAT UP JOHN CENA! Get em TITUS! BRUKK THEM UP!

Miesha_Tate_7

Miesha Tate, what I WOULD LOVE TO DO TO YOU… half guard, full guard, mounted position, side control, work you all over that octagon!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

You mean to tell me Sasha punched Dana through school buses so much that Dana’s  messed up headtop challenged her to a match? Dana… I’ll have New Cross Hospital on notice, and if STC’S Ed Mulhall comes to visit… I cannot help you…

OH MY GAWD THAT IS ENOUGH!

AAAAAHH SH!T The New Day gone to the Wyatt Compound…. hey Wyatt – BLACK LIVES MATTER!!!! That was some wild sh!t!!!! PG gone out the window! That right there… they just showed the Hardy Bwoy how to do it!

By the way, I have not seen that video the Hardys have done… nor do I have any interest in watching 17 minutes of that sh!t! I am the Infamous Informer and I have better things to do!

Come on kids, How can you want Cena when he’s not there??? You want the Bullet club an excuse to beat him up?

Er…. maybe the kids have summoning powers!!!! John Cena is here! Now the Bullet Club can beat him up!!! Er kids… can you chant Naomi then she can turn GRANT BODY PHENOMup at my door????

GRANT BODY-P!

Now this is what I came to see! Dana you fine but you gonna get BUSS ARSE! As for you Charlotte, you look like you ready to jump out on a casual date with your boy!

Gotta say Dana Brooke is going in with this match though!!!!

Charlotte – I love you but you are outta order and bright – Sasha doesn’t get lucky – no one has been able to defeat her since she jumped on RAW! But you forgot about all that didn’t you Charlotte? Get down on your long knees, take it out my majestic member, and put it between your wet lips, and suck!

GRANT BODY-P!

This is it! We gonna find out who gonna be running tings! They left this segment til last… so this is bound to leave my jaw dropped!

Haha Steph and Shane gotta fight their corner in the boardroom! Vincent Kennedy turn into Alan Sugar now!

Shane got the Smackdown spot, Stephanie got RAW, RAW is still 3 hours… Vincent Kennedy wants them to compete even if they break the law!!!! Inherit the keys to the kingdom! Each gotta employ a general manager as well! Ahhh sh!t! I can hear the fans crying -‘take it back to TV 14! That’s breaking the law!’ And Stephanie nearly brukk her ankle coming down the ring steps! It would be a sad day to see Stephanie with a brukk foot! Then she tried to do the Vincent Kennedy walk! HAHAHAAHAHA! DON’T GIVE ME JOKE!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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Monday Night Raw #1182, January 18, 2016!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

Aaaaaah sh!t! It’s about that time where Facebook’s #1 wrestling group leaves their keyboards, their HiPhones, their gidgets gadgets behind, come together and gather for the rumble… the ROYYYYAL RUMBLLLLLLLE!!! 30 men, The World Wrestling Federation Championship, somebody will be the champion and headline WrestleMania! Somebody in the Smack Talk Centre will be at least £30 richer, and the prestigious Smack Talk Centre Championship is on the line! Who gonna look good in their outfit?

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But before that, who you backing? who you think gonna win the rumble? Is AJ Styles & Co gonna appear? WELL DON’T GET GASSED! YOU are to blame if they don’t appear and you get angry… NOT MY PROBLEM!

GRANT BODY -P!

Find out on this week’s STC From The UK Show! Saturday 5pm UK 12noon EST! On BDSIR NETWORK – The Best Damn Show In Radiaaah!!!

RAW #1182! I am the Infamous Informer, Don’t get my hands dirty, I got goons that spray, quick to kill a motherf****r, like BOOM BYE YEAH!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZI HAVE A DREAM! That one day, Internet Wrestling Know It Alls would stop reading dirt shets, buying into everything they read, then throw wobblys because Cesaro isn’t pushed to the main event….

I HAVE A DREAM! That one day, Jimmy Uso will give Naomi a free pass, and she will travel here to the UK, find the Infamous Informer, and throw on some Raphael Saadiq, Backs Dat @$$ Up and allows him to give her one piece of sweet loving!

GRANT LUTHER KING!

Roman Reigns has come down the stairs! Brock Lesnar caused an injustice! He calls out Brock, but gets Jericho!

Jericho is inviting Reigns to come on the Highlight Reel with Brock! Well Jericho, prepare to have your Jeritron 65000 destroyed!!! That thing is going over somebody’s headtop surely!

Look at these League of Nation fools… they want in to the highlight reel… they all claim they gonna win the Rumble… as usual – we ALL wanna win the Rumble! Sh!t I wanna win the Rumble! But if those lights go out and the bell tolls… f**k that – over the top rope I go – ME GONE! (What about Brock Grant?) Oh I’ll hide underneath the ring until he’s gone!

After all that chatting… Roman Reigns Fights Rusev! Jericho is now the guest referee! Just like HBK… I don’t trust that Jericho! It’s one Vs all right? Roman Reigns watch your back rude boy!

Wait a minute – League of Nations at ringside??? TEEEEEEEF!!!! The ref should run them out the arena! But it’s Jericho, he wouldn’t do that… he’d rather beat out their blodclart himself!

High risk maneuver coming up – Rusev tries a Samoan Drop off the top ropes, Reigns counters – sit out power bomb to Rusev – BLAOW!!!!

Sheamus tried to teef – Jericho caught him! GET THE F**K OUTTA HERE! Barrett tries to reason with his big nose – COME OUT! Jericho is law & order! Bertie tries to reason… he’s out as well! Jericho doing the cartwheel while he’s doing it! Roman hits the superman punch and the spear to Rusev… BLAOW! 1….2…and….3!!!! League of WHAT? F**KOUTTAHERE!

Look at the chemistry between Jericho and Stephanie… god damnit Jericho wants to f**k her bad! You can see it in his face! I mean… one of these days… I will interview Jericho, and I want the TRUTH!

Look who’s back! Natalya! look at her suit – she got no draws on underneath that! So is Paige! Urgh… I still hate that b!tch! Natalya fighting Brie – you know it’s all about the Total Divas – THEY’RE BACK BABY!

Total Divas - Season 5

 

TOTAL DIVAS — Season: 5 — Pictured: “Total Divas” Season 5 Key Art — (Photo by: E! Entertainment)

6 of the 8 women would get the D from me… one of em is obvious but can you guess the other one? Answers on a postcard – tweet me @MZATheInfamous!

GRANT BODY -P!

While the Dudleys and Ryback are fighting each other in six man tag competition… just to confirm – Natalya had NO DRAWS ON! Something has happened to that woman…it’s

Natalya - No draws

Photo courtesy of that dutty bwoy Steadx!

almost as if Nikki passed the freaky baton on to Natalya! A Lie Me Ah Tell?

Not these blasted Social Outcasts… Big Show just punch all four of these jabronies through school buses!

Curtis Axel still on that Royal Rumble 2015 sh!t… can this fool enter the Rumble at #1 so that the #2 entrant can eliminate his blodclart?

GRANT BODY-P!

Aaaaaah sh!t – Stephanie injecting a lethal dose of TEEEEEF into the League of Nations! Come on guys??? a a King of the Ring Winner, a 40 man Royal Rumble winner and a former World Wrestling Federation Champion running scared of Jericho??? Stephanie just told them to f**k him up!

It’s kinda funny how Stephanie tells Jericho how it’s not 1999 anymore… I remember what happened in 1999, don’t you wrestling fans???!!!

For real Vincent Kennedy? 30 balls in that muthaf***a? And Roman Reigns gotta go first??? In the interest of fairness, they did try it 3 times… and it was… ROMAN REIGNS!!!! TEEEEEEEEEEEEF! Come on Roman – it can be done!!!! Gotta look strong right??!!!

Side note – Stephanie teasing the WWE Universe on some ‘somebody we haven’t seen before’ to win the Rumble or become #1 entrant… referring to AJ Styles & The Bullet Club or Nakumara? You should be so lucky… SHUT THE F**K UP!

GRANT BODY -P!

I am himBecky Lynch faces off against my girl Tamina…changed her music too… argh man you mean they couldn’t use the Busta Rhymes tune – I Love My B!tch????!

It’s official – 2 of the three members of Team BAD are out here… Sasha Banks is out the game… god damnit… just when Team BAD’s creative vaginal juices were about to flow…

GRANT BODY-P!!

Meanwhile Kevin Owens is trying to show Mike Cole how to do it on commentary… don’t do it too well Owens! F**k around and Vincent Kennedy will have you there pernamently like he tried with Randy Savage!

I know the New Day did not just hold a service for Franchesca the Trombone! All three guys dressed in black! Look what you have done Jericho! YOU MURDERER! I mean, what you did makes Chris Benoit look like an angel! How can WWE allow this man (Jericho) to be on TV??? They should erase him from history! HE KILLED A TROMBONE PEOPLE! While you jabronies pay to see him and his Fozzy jabronies singing nonsense and making unnecessary noise with the guitar??? WAKE UP PEOPLE! Cut off the funding towards his podcasts!

The New Day will exact their revenge, starting with The Uso brudda… they will fight for the Tag Titles… but they don’t have Franchesca… it cannot simply be replaced???

Whoa Whoa Whoa! Hold up – Mark Henry, Titus & R-Truth  – is that another team about to brew??? They have a dream.. and so does Neville! They will one day become World Wrestling Federation Champion! Sometimes guys, I like all of you but… dreams are just that – A DREAM!

They are up against The Ascension, Tyler Breeze and Stardust – with all these 4 man teams going on, can’t we have the Survivor Series as the next PPV? Do that traditional 4 vs 4 sh!t???

I’m gonna call this team – TEAM MLK… they all mashed up Tyler Breeze with their super moves! BALL GAME! Yo Tyler… NXT is THAT WAY! I don’t care how good you are as a wrestler – you wear that frilly sh!t – I ain’t taking your b!tch @$$ seriously!

GRANT BODY – P!

Aaaah sh!t – Where’s the Jeritron 650000 at? Holy crap – Jericho just told Heyman to Shut The Hell Up??? Ok – dude is going to Suplex City!

Say what? Did Jericho just ask Heyman if he has no faith in Brock winning the Rumble? Good counter by Heyman – Lesnar never got pinned or submitted when he lost the title… Heyman promises Brock will turn the Rumble into Suplex City! But who gonna eliminate Brock? That’s what I wanna know!

Jericho is sure of himself isn’t he? He really thinks he can throw Lesnar out the Rumble! It’s almost as if Jericho heard me ask the question! So did Brock by the sounds of things!

I think Roman heard me too! He’s coming down the stairs! The man who laughed in Suplex City!!!! I hope that tatical vest plays well Roman!

Reigns hit the spear to Lesnar – BLAOW! But the League of nations rushed the ring! I don’t know why… as Lesnar mashed them all up! But Reigns comes with another spear – BLAOW! Next minute the Wyatt man come! Check this out – they f**ked up Lesnar! You think they gonna take him away and harvest his powers too?

SH!T! The Wyatt Family killed muthaf***az like BOOM BYE YEAH!!!

SEE YOU AT RILEY’S SPORTS BAR WOLVERHAMPTON THIS SUNDAY MUTHAF***AZ!

SEE YOU AT RILEY’S SPORTS BAR WOLVERHAMPTON THIS SUNDAY MUTHAF***AZ!

SALUTE. GRANT BODY-P!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

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NEW STC LOGO 2015

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 Monday Night Raw #1181, January 11, 2016!!!

Before we go any further I would like to wish the man himself a great birthday. Happy Birthday to Wolverhamptons Finest

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

I wanna take this time and say THANK YOU to the Celtic Warrior Sheamus, who happily volunteered to take the Infamous Informer’s Birthday beatings for him! I gotta give him props, he took those suplexes like a boss… and put up a good fight in the process! Since the day Sheamus eliminated Dolph Ziggler out the Royal Rumble a year or so ago, that man can do nothing wrong in my eyes! Gratitude is infinite Sheamus!!

My facebook has blown up. My twitter has blown up. my phone has been firing all day. Yes! It is The Infamous Informer’s 36th Birthday! Do you think perhaps just once I might use the bathroom by myself?

GRANT BODY -P!

RAW #1181! LAYDEEZ! SHOE THE BIRTHDAY BOY YOUR T!TT!£$!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZAaaaah sh!t every superstar out on stage! And Vincent Kennedy’s music hits! Look at The New Day! They’re dancing to the theme music! Everyone else standing up straight!

See this is history right here… because the first time, the title was vacant. This time, Roman is defending the title. NEVER BEEN DONE BEFORE. Hold up!!!! Roman coming down the stairs!!!

Roman believes he can win! Well I would! Roman eliminated the most people! He won the rumble last year (yeah I see your blood about to boil…you really need to let bygones be bygones!)

So this is how it goes down – Vincent Kennedy is putting Roman to the test! In a 1…Vs All match… you mean like, the whole roster are gonna rush Roman Reigns??? The only man who may not have to be in it is Deano… who got blindsided by my hero Sheamus! Their contest starts now!

Sheamus looks like he never met Brock Lesnar! I know the house shows don’t exactly count… but Sheamus looks like he just won the powerball!

Clearly these two love to fight… there will be no contest today!!! Was Sheamus busted open? Irrelavant – Kevin Owens rushed Ambrose!

I apologise for I was meant to writ the SmackDown Blog last week, Kevin Owens and Ambrose had an Intercontinental title match, and by the looks of things… that didn’t go anywhere… to quote STC’s Aydenn Wardle… It HAS to be a falls count anywhere thing or something at the Rumble… don’t talk to me about a single match… these two wanna destroy each other – not use headlock takeovers and fireman’s carry and sh!t! You wanna see that – the highly credited WrestleKingdom 10 is on YouTube now – I can say this – I haven’t got time to watch that sh!t!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

The situation may change again!!!! Whoever wins the Royal Rumble, becomes the World Wrestling Federation Champion… but also faces BRRRROCCCCK LESSSSNAR??!!!! Assuming the haters are right… are WWE trying to cook a Reigns vs Lesnar II? But with the roles reversed??? Vincent kennedy doesn’t like the idea… suddenly I don’t think I would wanna win the Rumble now!!!

First Raw episode

You know… considering that, Undertaker in the main event of the very first RAW, and sharing a birthday with Mary J Blige… The Infamous informer has always been a ‘blessed’ man… ask your woman…

GRANT BODY – P!!!

This Highlight Reel should be off the hook!!!! The New Day as the guests?? Y2J got lyrics to go??? He just called em – Green Day???

Aaaah sh!t – Jericho got the Jeritron 65000! what happened to the last one? Oh yeah Jericho broke his own sh!t putting Shawn Michaels head through it!!!

Jericho claims to win the Rumble!!! I suggest you reconsider Jericho… Brock might already be at WrestleMania waiting…

The New Day are here! They wouldn’t break the Jeritron gidgets gadgets would they???

And Hold up – The Uso brudda???!! New Day bex they not the tag team of the year – I don’t blame em… that Save The Tables campaign went in vain… Look at the Usos flashing the awards in New Day’s face… come on guys! Power of positivity! don’t be bex – that’s negative vibes!!!

That’s the spirit Xavier! Play that Trombone! But playing it in Jericho’s face??? er…not a good idea! Did you see how Xavier ran a mile after jericho scared him hahahaha!

Xavier tried to teef! But Jericho picked up the trombone… and committed the most abomidable of all sins – he broke the trombone!!! How could he do something like that???

WHOA! Vincent Kennedy sticking to his guns! He refuses to let Heyman and Lesnar have their way! Ok this just got interesting…

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Big ups to Sting! First entrant in the Hall Of Fame 2016! But some of you jabronies say he doesn’t deserve it… well THE GRANT SAYS – you don’t deserve that large pizza you just got while you sitting on your @$$! You fat f**k – you broke your New Years Resolution already!

I don’t know where these Social Outcasts are going! Y’all better start fighting for your contracts – let alone fight the Wyatts!

Backside! just before the Wyatts was about tto f**k up these fools… The Ryback comes out like – don’t f**k with me! The question remains – they got Big Show too – why didn’t he come out after the Wyatt man dem?

Kalisto – YOUR TIME NOW! Can you mash up Bertie for the World Wrestling Federation for the US Title?

 

 

GRANT BODY-P!!!

GRANT BODY-P!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

FOLLOW SMACK TALK CENTRE ON TWITTER

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NEW STC LOGO 2015

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Monday Night Raw #1180, January 4, 2016!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

Show Charlie Murphy your titties

The realization just hit me.  Next Monday… It’s the Infamous Informer’s birthday! LAYDEEZ!!! Show Mike Dogg your t!tt!£$!! I think I should have a week off don’t you? F**k that – I GOTTA WORK! I want to continue entertaining you readers! But I warn you.. if you don’t see next week’s blog for some reason… that’s because either Jimmy Uso gave Naomi her ‘free pass’ or… The Infamous Informer is sexing your chick while you’re complaining on the internet about Roman Reigns!

GRANT BODY -P!

RAW #1180! LETS GET THAT 2016 FLOW! HOL’DAT – BLAOW!

WWF PROPA TINGZWell Stephanie doesn’t look too happy… but look who’s waiting at the stairs! Roman Reigns! Stephanie is talking calm… oooooooooh…that’s not good! She says she gonna make him suffer and fight for no reason until his body is destroyed! Roman says he’s gonna put a 70 year old man in Vincent Kennedy in the hospital if he f**ks with his title!!!! The question is out there!!! What is gonna happen in the title match? The Grant says this… it looks like Roman gonna f**k up Vincent Kennedy… but TRIPLE TEEF comes back… and USES DA HAMMER!!! That’s why Stephanie is talking so calm! WATCH DA RYDE!

Oh snap! Neville Vs Kevin Owens again??? AAAH yeah again and again! Will Neville neat Owens again in record time? If he does he’d better run like he should have done last week! But wait! Ambrose is at ringside… maybe Neville doesn’t need to run!

Say what???? Brock Lesnar returns on the Infamous Informer’s Born day??? Sh!t… I don’t want birthday suplexes! I bet it was you internet b!tches told him about me…

What a nasty Spike DDT from the top rope from Owens! Neville neck should have broke! SH!T! But Neville was fist and fire all over Owens! mash-up ribs and all!

Kevin Owens is STILL DA MAN! Neville did the right thing this time… just take the loss, Owens will show mercy….

Ooops! maybe not! Owens still wanted to beatdown Neville! Ambrose is having none of it! Deano, set up Owens on the announce table… Deano runs round the barricade, elbow drop to Owens through the table – BLAOW!!! And Deano grips the headpiece of Owens as if to say – DON’T F**K WITH ME!!!! Yo come the Intercontinental title match I don’t wanna see no basic singles match – these two guys are streetfighters! Take it back to the bars where the APA used to hang out!

AAAAAH SH!T! Vincent Kennedy is here! Yes, he broke the law last week, but this week, he IS THE LAW! Shout out to Motorhead!

Come on Titus! Brukk up that Stardust!!! Mash him up!!!! Beat out his blodclart!!!

Oh dear! Why doesn’t Stardust like when the crowd chant ‘Cody’??? I mean… the crowd are supporting him aren’t they??? They’re not? Oh dear….

The Clash of the Titus super move by O’Neill! BLAOW!!! Oh dear – Stardust is reading his own horoscope! It says – You got knocked the f**k out!

Looks like Becky & Charlotte gonna have another friendly wrestling contest…. YEAH RIGHT!!! Look at Ric Flair creep up behind Becky like – WOOOOOOOO!!! I’m telling you – he wants to f**k Becky!!! Yo Flair! The blue smarties is THAT WAY!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

Nice entrance by Becky!!! I mean, she always had it in the NXT… but it’s good to see it here!

Look at Ric Flair doing his strut while the ladies are having a sparring contest! I mean sh!t! I would! I don’t know what Charlotte has been spending her WWE divas champion money on – but she’s been looking fine lately!

Oh yeah! Ric Flair gonna be on the Austin podcast next week too! WWE is being GOOD TO ME!!! All I need is Naomi…

There’s a sign in the crowd saying ‘We Want Tamina’… So Do I!!!! Can’t I have all of TeamBAD for my Birthday next week???

Hold up – Becky grabbed the tights and beat Charlotte! Charlotte don’t like that sh!t because Becky was gloating in front of her father! Now Charlotte is beating down her so-called friend! Oh dear!

Did Sheamus just call Vincent Kennedy his ‘Irish cousin’??!!!! HAHAHA!!! How can you jabronies dislike Sheamus when he has a way with words? Oh I get it… he’s not CM P…. Can that be a New Years Resolution? To not mention that muthaf***a’s name??? It’s 2016! He’s not important to us! Unless it’s the YOU EFF CEE…

Ok I’m getting bored of wrestling match after wrestling match… The Ryback fights The Big Show… yes people… this came on last week… so I’m gonna take my medicine because The Grant is sick of this sh!t!!!! Give me a storyline segment already!

AAAH SH!T! Hold the medicine! Why The Wyatt man dem wanna f**k up Ryback? What’s this about???

Hold up – They got The Big Show too!!! This is what I don’t get – The Wyatts can’t harvest any power from Show and The Ryback so what are they tryna accomplish????

Aah yes… The Royal Rumble… But it’s every man for himself though right? 4 guys cannot go to WrestleMania???? Er…

Meanwhile Dolph Ziggler is hoping to punch his ticket to big BIG WrestleMania…haahahahaha The Grant says – He will have his best Rumble performance yet… but… DREAM… DREAM….DREAM….. I BROUGHT YOU ALL MY DREAMS!!!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!

Mike wake up – wha-what-What- yo Heath Slater beat Ziggler!!! BACKSIDE!!! And Slater has a new crew! No not the 4-man band… they are #SocialOutcasts… ok well… anyway…

Vincent Kennedy is giving me joke! Telling both Sheamus and Roman Reigns that it will be a fair contest!!! (YEAH RIGHT…!!!)

Thank you to STC’s David Connor Richardson… I could have done without that information, now I didn’t get to mark out that Chris Jericho turned up! Yes the ratings need a boost, network subscriptions need a boost… to do that Jericho all you have to do is tease Stephanie’s fine @$$… job done!

Aaah sh!t – Jericho gonna enter the Royal Rumble??? Well Jericho… your fate will be the same as Ziggler… DREAM…DREAM…DREAM… I BROUGHT YOU ALL MY DREAMS!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

Kalisto and the Dudley Boys combine their force to compete against the UpUpDownDown guys… I’m sure the trombone will get involved, but I wanna see Team BAD… can’t they interfere in this match or something and shake they @$$??WWE2K16 GRANT BODY -P!

That was a nasty splash off the apron to Kalisto from Big E! But whining up his waist in front of  a guy is not cool yo!!! If that was me I would have got on the mic and called out Team BAD! If they gave me the creative keys…Team BAD would be in BIG trouble!

HAHAHAHA!!! Vincent Kennedy with the power walk in his referee shirt! He could have done with a tan though… His old man body is starting to show!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

And the match is under way!!! I hope Vincent Kennedy calls it down the middle!!! But we both know that ain’t gonna happen!

Wait a minute… Sheamus used the stairs!! THAT’S TEEF! And Vincent Kennedy had his back turned!!! Hey Vince! You said no underhanded tactics!

Remember Roman! Don’t let Sheamus put you in the submission move! Vince is a very ‘inexperienced’ referee!!!

VINCENT KENNEDY TEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!! What sort of slow count was that??!!! Roman Reigns WILL f**k him up!!! But I’m sure that Triple Teef is behind the curtain with that hammer…

Reigns goes for the cover again… this time Vincent Kennedy needs eye drops! He is 70 after all!

Why did Roman hit the Superman Punch on Vincent Kennedy? How is he gonna win???

Stephanie gets involved too! And a crooked referee! Still waiting on that Triple Teef!!!

Somehow, Roman Reigns survives… but check this out… Vincent Kennedy flips the script! Roman Reigns must defend his title against 29 other men… er that’s right… The Royal Rumble is for the World Wrestling Federation Championship! That hasn’t been done since 1992!!! This has changed EVERYTHING!!! Er now is a good time to play that track Grant…

GRANT BODY-P!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

FOLLOW SMACK TALK CENTRE ON TWITTER

DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.

NEW STC LOGO 2015

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Gratefully reproduced by kind permission of The Infamous Informer at Smack Talk Centre RAW

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Monday Night Raw #1171, November 2, 2015!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

I wanna give a BIG SHOUT OUT to Jerry the King Lawler. That man is officially indestructible. He was calling a match, then he had heart attack, and Lawler defeated death. Most recently he was in a car accident. The man emerged with not one scratch pon him. Defeated death again! You think he’s somehow related to that Hayden Panettierre cheerleader girl in Heroes? I’m sure he has had dirty thoughts about her… she’s young after all…

GRANT BODY – P!

We are celebrating 25 years of the Don of Dons! Shout out to WWE.Com who got the divas all dressed up in sexy Undertaker like wear! Throughout this week’s blog you will see the divas in their ‘Undertaker’ gear… GOD DAYUUUUM!!!

RAW #1171! HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

wwf logoYo I got that new WWE2K16! On PS3 though. Because PS4 costs too much!!! People – I put it like this – it’s an eyelash BETTER than WWE2K14 on last gen, which means WWE2K15 is straight garbage! Take that sh!t back to the store and trade the sh!t in! I have it on good authority that the PS4/XBoxOne versions are brilliant. COP YOURS NOW!!!

Let’s start this sh!t! Uh-Oh… Roman Reigns! Please Roman, don’t talk longer than 5 minutes! Just be straight up, tell Seth Rollins you’re gonna beat out his blodclart, then go back up the stairs!!!

He actually took my advice!!! Well done Reigns! That’s all you need!

Forget what Rollins said, he was actually gonna go down and test Reigns! But the Authority just had to show up… but that’s ok..that Stephanie… sexy f**ka!!!!

AAAAAH SH!T! We gonna have a Survivor Series jump off on RAW? Team Rollins Vs Team Reigns! WHAAAT! But why have I got this feeling Team Rollins gonna teef and brukk up Roman’s team before the match even happens? Then Reigns gotta run the gauntlet? Will we see Triple Teef sing Another One Bites The Dust again?

Talking of the video above, Dolph Ziggler is set for action… now he got this beef going with Tyler Breeze, the new battyman of the WWE. Yes, Ziggler has passed the baton on! Tyler Breeze, a man of phenomenal skill, is wearing frilly boots, loves himself, and wears pink wrestling tights. Sorry guys… that’s GAY!

Ziggler fighting Owens… oh dear… it will be a great contest, but Ziggler cannot withstand Owens pop-up powerbomb super move!

Ziggler leg mash-up though… Come on Owens – Charlie Horse that muthaf***a! KILL HIM!!! And KILL TYLER BREEZE while you’re at it!

And another thing – Tyler Breeze taking selfies – that’s GAY as well – yeah I said it! Now in the Smack talk Centre we have a dude who takes selfies – We call him #MrSelfie, but he doesn’t act like he loves himself and sh!t! He takes selfies with his fans!

I will say that is OUTTA ORDA & Bright what Breeze did, Ziggler all f**ked up on the canvas and Breeze taking selfie right by him! HE CAN’T DO THAT!

You know what I don’t understand, if you wrestling fans love Cesaro so much, why is it that there is a small Cesaro section in every arena and not the capacity crowd? Doesn’t sound logical to me…

Now Stardust & The Ascension are running around with ‘Stardust Section’ banners over their head too… these Ascension guys have lost direction, they are supposed to be official bad men who strike fear into every tag team! Now no-one is scared of these guys!

I knew that WACK Swagger would get involved in this Del Rio/Colter sh!t… didn’t I tell you that last week? At least the ignited feud has given Swagger something to do…

Now Zeb – don’t talk about my Canadian people like that (“I’d ask the Canadian people to join us if they were not so simple-minded”) Just because you now supporting Bertie… does not mean I like you – I DON’T! I keeps it real – if the Infamous Informer don’t like you – then damnit – HE DON’T LIKE YOU! Whether you turn face or heel!

Check it – WWE are promoting Batista and his new James Bond movie! We have not seen the last of he who despite the fact he’s a Wu-Tang Fan, insists on wearing skinny jeans and funny looking Bluetista attire!

FOR REAL!!! NOW INDIA have the WWE Network???!!! I gotta say WWE how could you disrespect Cena’s most loyal fans like that? By acquiring India, revenue is gonna go through the roof with John Cena (or should I say Jhon Chyena) as the most watched superstar on the network! UK fans – APOLOGISE to WWE – we acted like spoilt brats when we wanted our network!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

OH HELL 2 THE NO!!! That blubbering potato stick in his beard Wyatt has teefed Undertaker and Kane’s powers??!! He can summon Thunder, Lightning & Fire??? He’s DONE IT NOW!!!!

But since Undertaker is due on Smackdown next week in the UK, I love to see how this plays out! But The GRANT SAYS THIS: NO ONE MAN SHOULD HAVE ALL THAT POWER…

OH NO!!!! Looks like Team Rollins is complete! joining Rollins: Kevin Owens, and The New Day! Once again – the New Day killed me! They used the Power of Positivity on Seth Rollins and guess what – IT WORKED! Rollins is there, dancing to the New Day Trombone! HA! HA! HA! HA!

Roman Reigns team is yet to be completed… but we don’t need to worry about that – it’s time for the laydeez!!!

Winner faces Charlotte at the Survivor Series joint! It is painfully obvious who is gonna win, so I’m gonna back Sasha, because she is Team B.A.D. and that’s how it goes!

YES! LOVE IT! Sasha kicked Paige out the ring and said “That’s right! This is MY HOUSE now!” TELL HER SASHA!!!

I love Sasha as much as the next man, but I’m gonna keep it real. Why does Sasha look like she bleached her skin? Answers on a postcard – tweet me @MZATheInfamous!

Sasha is fine but Naomi is still the sexiest woman on the roster – YEAH I SAID IT!

Meanwhile Becky Lynch is getting it in and beating out Paige’s blodclart!

Did Becky just… did she just drop a triple super plex on Paige, Sasha and Brie from the top? I think she did! That was off the hook!

Brie dropping the Yes kicks, Sasha issuing everybody Bank Statements, but that b!tch Paige hit Becky with the Ram-Paige super move… damnit!!! But was it surprising? Of course it wasn’t! Time for Charlotte to KILL the Anti-Diva once and for all!!

REPRESENTING TEAM REIGNS! Roman, Deano, The Ryback, and THE USOS! They’re BACK!! Roman called to his family!!! Now this Survivor Series match can jump off!

Look at Xavier running off his mouth like ‘I GOT THIS!’ – BLAOW! A ‘super kick’ in Xavier’s jawbone! Oh dear, the suoer kick is not sacred anymore… but let’s be real, there was a unique way how HBK did it.. he personalised that move. You were all jerking off when Ziggler did it and you named him the next HBK! So to that I say – SHUDDUP!

Oh dear the Power of Positivity is not working for The New Day! Kingston has been eliminated! Big E kicked in the door and hit the Big Ending Super Move on Jey Uso – BLAOW! He’s eliminated!

Jimmy Uso, with ANOTHER super kick to Big E, The remaining table saving member finds himself on the outside, Jimmy goes Uso Crazy, but runs right into a pop-up powerbomb from Owens – BLAOW!! Back Brukk!!

Ryback responds… Shell shock to Big E!!!

Rollins jumps in. Pedigree! The PEDIGREE to The Ryback!

Owens & Rollins teaming up and ,mashing up Ambrose, but they failed to realise that Lunatics have the strength of 10 men! Dirty Deeds to Owens – BLAOW!!! Now the tables are turned! Only Rollins left! He can’t take the pressure, so he thought f**k it – Steel chair to the gut of Ambrose – a shot to the back of Roman Reigns – I’m out this b!tch!

You may not like that but it masks who could possibly win in the title match… and that’s the science behind that! But Deano – talk to your girl – she took it upon herself to let us drool over her!

 

GRANT BODY – P!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

FOLLOW SMACK TALK CENTRE ON TWITTER

DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.

 

Monday Night Raw #1167, October 5, 2015!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

It’s that time of the month people! and I don’t mean wrestling fans on their period!

GRANT BODY – P!

Not only have we gotta save the tables, but we gotta save the t!tt!£$ as well! Those things are good to us! And we are gonna celebrate t!TT!£$ this week on this week’s blog, because breast cancer is a serious thing. So if you’re a feminist, or a 40-year-old virgin who cums at the sight of nipples, or a battyman in love with CM Princess Peach B!tch, THIS BLOG IS NOT FOR YOU!!!

RAW #1167! HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZMike Cole says we are in for a hell of a show… I hope he means no ‘repeat’ matches! Big Show seems to be alright as well, after the beating he took at MSG by BRRROOCCCK LESSSNARR who has kicked off RAW!

Oh no not the WrestleMania XXX nightmare…. I can’t relive that again and again! That’s like Bruce Lee when he had to fight that demon in his life!

Then the Summerslam ‘screwjob’… I mean, I’m Undertaker through and through and I will support him 100%… Heyman says it’s not a prediction, it’s a spoiler, One will walk out of the cell the victor, and the other will not walk out at all.. Oh well Brock… you are a beast… but Undertaker becomes a DEMON in that cell!

Oh what is the Big Slow doing out here? WORD? He’s gonna put his hand out and say Brock is the DON?!!!

What an idiot… Big Show – you are a Big Fool! Another suplex and an F-5 – BLAOW!!!! Now go to your room!

OFFICIAL – Roman Reigns fights Bray Wyatt in the Cell! YES! Finally WWE have got it right. two extremely personal rivalries that has gone too far that they have to send for the cell. That’s how it should be!

LADIES! Roman Reigns is in the ring! 6 man tag team action! Come on girls rub on your t!TT!£$!

467e0753-349a-4b1a-bddb-394b222c5d35That’s what’s up – Be Proud of your t!TT!£$!!! Roman Reigns is sure to win!

YES!!! Because you women rubbed yout t!TT!£$… nipples hard and all… The combined might of Reigns, Ambrose and Orton mash-up the Wyatt bwoy dem!

Don’t tell me Neville is gonna fight Stardust… oh thank goodness it’s Sheamus!

Sheamus talking too much sh!t, bad man move in silence… Neville starts kicking Sheamus all over the ring…and… the match dun already? You know what that was? that was Neville, Sheamus and Barrett (who was at commentary) basically saying ‘Yes sir’ to Mr McMahon’s register just to say they were present…

Oh no!!! It’s my hero! Bi-Polar Kane!!! Look at him! his leg is ‘mash up’!!! Seth is fed up of the mind games!!! The joke is that Seth shows so much hatred against Corporate Kane… and Kane acting like he’s the good Samaritan!

Ooh Stephanie is out here – if anyone supports breast cancer more than anybody, even me, it’s Stephanie! But check it – if the Demon Kane does not defeat Seth Rollins for the title at the PPV, then Corporate Kane is out of a job…. hmmmm…. logic says I support Seth Rollins here! As I was saying… let’s honor Stephanie’s t!TT!£$… even though they are a bit on the false side…

Stephanie tittiesNatalya back on di telly! Her opponent… the UNGRATEFUL BRAT – Paige! Hopefully she will lose again… come on Natalya, show Paige how to do it! You come from the Hart Dungeon – you cannot let this little b!tch win!

Look at Natalya throwing those bows! Come on girl! mash her up!!!

It’s NEVER your house b!tch! Do you pay the rent – NO – Shut the f**k up!

GRANT BODY – P!

THAT’S IT NATALYA! Twist the b!tch up in that submission Razor Ramon used to do!

I swear down I hate when Paige even speaks now… so unattractive… I don’t get it guys – how is this woman so appealing? seriously guys, you got 30 seconds to convince me…WWE2K16 GRANT BODY -P!

Natalya applies the sharpshooter! But Paige made it to the ropes… SH!T!

Natalya got her again!! YES!!! THE B!TCH TAPPED OUT! GET THE F**K OUTTA HERE PAIGE!

The rest of Raw could be wack… Naomi may not appear… I don’t care – NATALYA BEAT PAIGE! Justice is finally restored!

Ever wondered why I didn’t write about the Lucha/Ryback/Kevin Owens match/segment? Because it wasn’t worth talking about…

Damn who p!$$£d Stephanie off? Maybe she found the pic of her ‘t!TT!£$’ exposed on the internet… IT WASN’T ME! I put up a nice picture of her! Even The New Day are confused… they thought she liked em! Maybe she does! I dunno…she mentioned nothing about tables so I suppose she supports the cause… #SaveTheTables

http://www.ipetitions.com/petition/save-the-tables

URRRRGHHHH This is tiresome… can’t this be on a segment after RAW live? I mean, It’s all good for Cena to be the spokesperson of this breast cancer sh!t and bigging up the breast cancer survivors… I have an idea, while Cena is doing that, let’s throw up another good ol’ t!TTy picture…

Torrie-Wilson-bikiniAAAH SH!T – they got Roman Reigns being a spokesperson too? THERE YOU GO GUYS! You can hate him now… but he won’t stop now!

For real – we just gonna have this match now? Corporate Kane & Seth Rollins vs The Dudley Boys?

HOLD UP – Someone is tuning into RAW this week…

If you’re going to give money to a company that claims to raise money for finding a cure for cancer, please do someresearch.Komen is a scam

I tend to believe him… but it’s like yo… why is he so concerned?

Anyway back to this – Uh-oh  – the Dudleys sent for the tables…. what must The New Day be thinking???

IT’S KAAAANE!!!! AAAAH SH!T! But the Dudleys stand their ground! They remember what Kane did to them at SmackDown… 3D!!! – BLAOW!!! Kane laid out! So before Seth took foot and run… the fool taunts Kane doesn’t he? Now I’ve watched this wrestling sh!t a long time, and I know that if Kane or Undertaker are laid out on the canvas… you NEVER stand over them… they WILL crab you by your neck from a floored position, then CHOKESLAM – BLAOW!! right through the table!

The New Day must be crying in the car at this time… guys – you may not have saved that table.. but you can save the t!TT!£$… I know you wanna save Team BAD’s t!TT!£$… SO DO I!!! You guys save Tamina and Sasha… but Naomi – she’s ALL MINE!

TEAM BAD 2These three… you don’t want to know what’s going through the mind of the Infamous Informer… GRANT BODY – P!

Imagine if Team BAD defeats the Bellas as well… I’d love to hail RAW as the best ever! But obviously I cannot do that…

WHOA!!!! Now when Brie drops the Danny Bryan kicks, the Boston crowd chant NO! NO! NO!

YES!!!! TEAM BAD show the Bellas how to do it! I can now go to bed happy… but there is still half an hour at best of this sh!t…

A wha de raaaaar??? Summer Rae with a tribute to the Super Athlete Rusev??? Where is this going?

BACKSIDE??!!!! NO! Summer going on her crusty knees? What is she gonna ask him – will you let me suck your c-

GRANT BODY-P!!!!

I guessed wrong! But marriage??? She calls him Ru-Ru! She says he can walk out of WrestleMania 32 as the World Wrestling Federation Champion???? WHOA!!!!

HE SAID YES!!!! BACKSIDE!!! Mr & Mrs Bulgarian Brute???

But not yet???? He says he gotta be the champion FIRST! Good thinking there Rusev! Sounds a reasonable deal to me… because if he wins, he can pay for the wedding! Rusev has his head screwed on!

To take your mind off that storyline… lets celebrate some more t!TT!£$… Lana where you at girl?

The crowd is like “John Cena SUUUUUUCKS!” Oh dear!

Who’s the opponent this week? They making a big deal of it this week, like there’s a surprise lurking…

Dolph Ziggler? Yes the match will be good but quite frankly, I’m not interested…

OH SNAP!!! THE NEW DAY GOT HIM!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

BIG E is gonna take him!!!! COME ON BIG E!!!!!

BIG E is straight dominating this match!!! Byron Saxton is right – underneath all that comedy, all that ‘obnoxious’ behavior, BIG E was a former NXT Champion, Former Intercontinental Champion… so BIG E can do this!

Imagine that – New Day with Tag Team and the US Title? similar to The Shield? Anyhow they win… Team BAD are in trouble… you know The New Day love to mess around with Team BAD… I WOULD!

OH NO! The New Day got caught trying to teef! Damnit…. Cena won, but The New Day continuing the assault, that fool Ziggler comes out – BUT YO – Ziggler super kicks Cena accidentally! It’s becoming obvious from here, considering certain rumors… Ziggler gonna be that dude to defeat Cena… ain’t that a b!tch… Damn The New Day mashed up Cena, Ziggler and the Dudley Boys???!!!! Xavier mashed up the trombone effect! But it doesn’t matter! THEY KILLED IT!!!

Now guys, let’s go out and nurture and caress and appreciate those t!TT!£$! Let’s make Dean Ambrose proud!

GRANT BODY – P!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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Monday Night Raw #1160, August 17, 2015!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw

OHHHHHH SH!!!!!!!!!!!!!T!!!!

I had to watch this again rude boy… Come on WWE… NO WAY can you make this a one on one wrestling contest… I want CHAIRS! TABLES! STEEL STAIRS! SHOVELS! FIGHT IN THE CROWD! FIGHT ‘TO THE DEATH’!!!

BRRRRROCCCCK LESSSSNARRRR! THE UNNNNNNDERTAAAYYYKERRR!!! One does not simply break the streak and lives! #1160! HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

wwf logoWe in Brock Lesnar’s hometown! The roof gonna go off in this b!tch!!! Throw the PG rating out the window from NOW!!!

Before we know that Raw is gonna be Off The Hook… it doesn’t hurt to endure a 20 minute segment of Triple H saying absolutely NOTHING-ERRR!!!

As for Stephanie… damn you know Triple is pulling that long hair when he rides it in!!!

How can a match be bigger than WrestleMania??? That doesn’t make any sense???? I understand the hyping part… but f**k it – I’m not complaining!

Contract signing! an F-U into the contract table? A Curb St- er I mean a Pedigree through the contract table??

Hold up – Champion Vs Champion in Nikki Bella Vs Sasha Banks!!! Ok that’s changed everything!

The host of Summerslam is Jon Stewart? Er nah – F**k that – the HOST of Summerslam is none other than me – Infamous Informer, Wolverhampton’s Last Outlaw, The Daywalker, Ladies Favourite Man In the Purple Suit – GRANT BODY – P!!!

Hold up – didn’t Seth Rollins have a beef with Jon Stewart???? Er… UH-OH!!!!!! Maybe Stewart should be the special guest referee for the Cena Rollins match???? DO IT WWE!!!!

AAAAH SH!T!!! Even Jonathan Coachman from ESPN will be covering the Summerslams!!!! There’s your dumb dirt sheets for ya… you d!ckheads thought he was coming back huh??? What was that? You were getting the WWE Network if Coach comes back??? You bumblehead fool – GET IN THE CHAIR!!!

Now, Cesaro and Randall team up… that’s cool. Kevin Owens & Sheamus team up… hmm how long will this last?

The fans chanting ‘You Look Stupid…’ Sheamus is like – RESPECT THE HAWK! Yeah muthaf***az! If you can respect the beard… you can respect the Hawk!!! (Oh wait…)

We got fans with representing the ‘Cesaro Section’… You still think he’s missing something Vince????

OHHHHHHHHHH SH!!!!!!T!!! THE DON OF DONS WILL SPEAK!

“When the grym reaper calls your name, there is no apology…

When the grym reaper calls your name, there is no remorse…

…BROCK LESNAR, YOU WILL NEVER REST IN PEACE…”

AAAAH SH!!!T! This Lesnar dude gonna burn in hell!!!!

SAY WHAAAAT???? If Seth Rollins beats John Cena at Summerslams, he will have his own statue in the WWE Headquarters???? ooh I can’t wait to get on the STC Predictions show on BDSIR Network!!!!! Anyone who tells me that Seth Rollins gonna win…. oh boy oh boy!!!!

Gotta love Ambrose handing Wyatt a chair and warning him if he makes one false move… Ambrose gonna f**k him up!!! What’s wrong Wyatt? You miss your rocking chair that Abigail gave you? That’s what you get for f**k!n around with the true DON OF DONS!

YO!!! BIG RESPECT AND BIRTHDAY SHOUT OUT TO THE STC ADMIN – IAN ANTHONY COOPER A.K.A. #MRSELFIE! SALUTE THIS MAN!!! (But not the tattoo on his arm hahahahaa!)

Thankfully the PWL Money In The Bank briefcase is covering that abomination of a tattoo!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

After so many power moves from Luke Harper, one superman punch and a spear later – BLAOW! Reigns wins! Ha – the Roman haters gonna hate that one! Well f**k you!

I so want Tamina to defeat Becky Lynch in this contest… but I know it won’t happen… I’d do the bogle if Tamina won!

Fans chanting Happy Birthday to Paige… yeah well… HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARCUS GARVEY!!!! SALUTE TRUE GREATNESS!

Oh well…. no bogling for me tonight… there is still Nikki Bella Vs Sasha Banks… backing Sasha… but in a strange way… I want Nikki to win… #DoTheKnowledge

Mark Henry you’re my dude but real talk – put the American Flag down! Cena already closed that chapter with Rusev…

How the f**k is Summer Rae gonna call Lana a gold digging whore??? Lana helped Rusev earn that medal – Summer Rae is trying to live off the medal… f**kouttahere!! Just open your legs and let me put it in!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

I love the Bulgarian flag when it pops off with Rusev looking serious on that sh!t!!!! I wished it was done for Summerslams though…

Lana calling out Summer Rae??? We gonna see Lana’s little panties again??? Why have I got this feeling that Ziggler fool is gonna show up!

THERE YOU GO!!! Ziggler! Kicks down Rusev – BLAOW! Lana! kicks down Summer!!! BLAOW!!!

MAKE THE MATCH AT SUMMERSLAMS DAMNIT!!!

I’d rather see a big dude punch thru school buses on a film called Vendetta than a queer-looking dyam arse who thinks he’s a marine! In the meantime I want he who likes to be fed more to shell shock the Miz like he’s Shredder to the Turtles!

OHHHH Ryback wants The Big Show! Your eyes might be bigger than your belly Ryback!!!!

Big Show is like – nah! GO AHEAD AND STAAAAAAARRRRRRRRVE!!!!

Dayuuum is that a marble table???? Ok guys no physicality! gotta be 100 for Summerslams!!!!

Imagine if Rollins did defeat Cena??? I’d chip in and build that statue myself! Hell – I’m sure all the Cena haters would get in there and work hard!

For real? Cena held the WWE Universe hostage for a decade? He’s a disease??? WHOA!!! Rollins injected the serum! Rollins is the cure!!! Cena haters are masturbating right now! YES – the same haters who also said – Rollins is not a good champion! Guess what b!tches! #WhoeverLosesIWIN!

Oh damn Cena put Rollins on blast! Hand picked by Triple… and the fans don’t say sh!t about him! Oh lawwwd… Cena put The Rock on blast before – how many guys can say they have done that?!

AAAAH SH!T Cena said he’s gonna do something that will haunt TRIPLE for the rest of his life! He SAID IT! He will become champion for the 16th time!!!!! Oh lawwwd he’s talking about Ric Flair…. Aaaah sh!t this is not cool!!! Triple was never Ric Flair’s b!tch!!! Why have I got this feeling Ric Flair gonna appear at Summerslam????

Can’t make out if the crowd are chanting NEW…DAY ROCKS or SUCKS!!! How can you NOT like the New Day??? And Kofi’s clap is funny as f**k!

10 matches announced. The card is complete! the question remains – who gonna be the kick off match??? Or is there one??? Well true say we don’t need to worry about a HOF segment or a musical performance which is usually wack…

RECORD SKIP??!!!! Did Wade Barrett just refer to himself and Stardust as the ‘Lords of Darkness’??? and the Don of Dons is in the building????

Beautiful Lady, Go Ladies, Lovely Lady, GO LADIES! Lovely Ladies! GO LADIES!

Ok this is the match I’m looking forward to! Nikki Bella vs Sasha Banks! #WhoeverLosesIWIN! I always win!!!!

AND HERE WE GO!!! Show dem how to do it Sasha!

Sasha killing Nikki right now! And she’s dropping press ups – LIKE A BOSS!!!

Even Nikki is stepping her game up again with her fighting style!

HOLD UP! Sasha got the Bank Statement super move on Nikki! Nikki tapping out! AAAAAH SH!T – do you know what this means? Wait – let me do the knowledge…

It could be a long shot, but at NXT Takeover Brooklyn, it’s Nikki Bella who interferes and costs Sasha the NXT Title, thus Bayley winning. But I don’t think NXT is about that storyline sh!t so, I still see Sasha losing… then next week’s RAW or any RAWS after that or Night of Champions joint, Sasha will LOSE against Nikki for the Divas title… extending her campaign for 300+ days… who will break that reign? CHARLOTTE FLAIR. Remember I told ya!

DAMN LIKE I SAID – THE ROOF HAS BLOWN OFF! CONFETTI ALL OVER THE SHOP!

NO!!!! PAUL HEYMAN HAS A HYMN! HE’S SINGING GLORY GLORY BROCK LESNAR!!! NOW THE BELL HAS TOLLED! YOU DUN IT NOW!

Oh hang on – Mind games… it’s the Undertaker – who is getting booed – but that’s ok – it’s in Lesnar’s home town… It’s all good!

I thought Brock was gonna do all the talking! Oh sh!t – the bell tolled again!

THE DON OF DONS! Ok so he’s getting booed – NO PROBLEM… because Summerslam they in Brooklyn – not Minnesota!

Dolph Vs Rusev! Sheamus Vs Orton! Fatal 4 Way Tag Title Match! Ryback Vs Miz Vs Big Show IC Title! The Shield Vs The Wyatts! Owens Vs Cesaro! Stardust and Barrett Vs Neville & Green Arrow! PCB Vs B.A.D. Vs BellaDashians! John Cena Vs Seth Rollins! BRRRROCCCK LESSSNAAR Vs THE UNNNNNDERTAAAYYYYYKERRRR! They are all…

TRIBES AT WAR!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

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Smack Talk Centre

Monday Night Raw #1157, July 27, 2015!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw

I am him: Infamous Informer, Wolverhampton’s Last Outlaw, GRANT BODY -P! I will tell you straight up and down – I’M NOT TALKING ABOUT HULK HOGAN. Only exception is if it’s in relation to this week’s RAW. I’m already sick of the sh!t over the weekend.

But that Terminator WWE2K16 though!!!! First thing on payday I’m taking my backside to GAME and pre-ordering that sh!t! I can’t see what the problem is with you gaming/wrestling nerds, you want special characters in games but you complain? Oh yeah I forgot, I don’t like your kind anyway!

If the crowd chant for Hogan, I won’t hold it against them. But after that, y’all gotta let it burn. RAW #1157: HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZYou watch, I’m in effect live this week and Brock Lesnar & Undertaker are not at RAW. It would be just my luck.

…and how does the show start? With the evil one himself – TRIPLE TEEEF!!! I am the gamerrrr…. I couldn’t control the situationerrrrrrr, I can’t get to the point in 20 minuteserrrrrr!!!

The rumours are true rude boy!!!! Summerslam 4 hours – GOD DAMN!!!! RILEY’S WOLVERHAMPTON – GET READY!!!!

What? More announcements? Ok Dean Ambrose Vs Big Show I can ride to that, Sasha Banks Vs Paige – Show her who the boss is Sasha! And Randy Orton Vs Kevin Owens??? Bellas Vs Charlotte/Becky? Big wrestling matches ah gwarn!

Seth Rollins – don’t expect me to stand up and say you’re the greatest champion of all time, you didn’t fight Undertaker & Brock Lesnar therefore…. you’re ONE OF the greatest pu$$!£$ of all time!

You just insulted John Cena my dude! OH SH!T – Cena paid his dues in the apology tour! He wants #16!!!! I support this! I’m all for upsetting the IWC!!!!

YES MOVEMENT for Cena Vs Rollins for the WWE title? No? Stephanie just trolled us all! God damn you woman! Go and kiss dog!

GRANT BODY-P!

But Cena gotta defend his US Title against Rollins? Looks like the apology tour continues! I can ride to that! Backing Cena all the way! Cena successfully defends… I called it last week – Title for Title at Summerslam – REMEMBER I TOLD YA!

I though Ambrose was on some Eddie Guerrero sh!t – untying Big Show’s laces then taking out his legs! It was purely strategy to recoup…

Remember back in the days? When Big Show used to do the chokeslam and that would be it?

Yo Miz – keep telling yourself you’re the baddest muthaf**a in the WWE – f**k around and the glass will smash! I know somebody who you tell you different!

OHHH SNAP!!!!! Ambrose went for the suicide dive, and landed right into Big Show’s fist – PPPPPPPP! Ambrose ain’t making the ten count f**k that!

And even after all that, Ambrose got to his feet, Big Slow was gonna finish him… Ambrose sidestep – BOOM – right into the barricade!

For real???? Fandango is still alive???? Oh well he ain’t now… Neville just settled him with the Red Arrow… What’s Stardust beef with Neville??? Does he fancy him or something??? I think Stardust thinks a Red Arrow is one of those Ice lollies you get from the ice cream man…..

OH MY GOD THAT IS ENOUGH!!!

Paige’s team don’t want none of B.A.D…. sh!t I DO!!! I want all of that Sasha, I want that Tamina roughness, and I want Naomi to drop squats on my c-MZA DAYWALKER 2

SOMEBODY GET HIM OUTTA HERE!!!!

You see this is why Grant is not a Paige fan, she got Charlotte and Becky Lynch wearing ‘This Is My House’ shirts… they don’t have a team name, so it’s still all about Paige… mannn… f**k that b!tch!

LET’S GO SASHA!! Kill her! Destroy her completely!

You will see… in months to come, Paige gonna f**k over Becky and Charlotte… remember I told ya!

Aaaah sh!t why the ref throw out the women at ringside? What is he gay too? If that was me, I’d send for a next referee and I’ll go away with Charlotte, Becky, Naomi & Tamina! Me and them four would have a REAAAL good time!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

YES! MY GIRL SASHA HIT PAIGE WITH THE BANK STATEMENT!!! Whose house is it now b!tch!!! That’s what’s up!

For real Rusev? You gonna get Summer Rae a dutty dawg? Good idea Rusev call the dog – Dolph Ziggler! That’s a great name!

He got Summer Rae a dead fish??? Oh my days – he’s tryna say Lana pu$$y smells??? OUTTA ORDER & BRIGHT!

Pushing the boundaries are we Triple Teef??

OH NO! Lana kick down Summer Rae! and rub her face in the fish! You know what Lana’s tryna say right???

GRANT BODY – P!

Haha I just love when Rusev is cussing! Face it Rusev – you want Summer Rae to dress like Lana on some Action Bronson biting Ghostface style and sh!t – admit it – Summer Rae was just the consolation prize!

What I wanna know is, why are muthaf***az concerned about Axelmania? The Grant says – F**K AXELMANIA! AxelMania is dead, and in its death, long live the DAYWALKER!!! GRANT BODY – P!!!

Ok – a lil mathematics – last week, Los Matadores beat the PTP, I thought that makes them #1 contenders… this week Lucha Dragons beat Los Matadores… both matches had The New Day causing the distraction… is it me or do I smell a Fatal Four Way match at Summerslam? Come on! Throw the Tables, Ladders and the Chairs in there let’s do this!!! (Oh sh!t am I asking too much? I better get my mind out the attitude era!)

For real Wyatt? You just gonna say that the parents don’t love their kids? Well at least he isn’t speaking cryptically…he’s gotta point though, the police don’t protect us… they wanna destroy us because they can and get away with it…

Wyatt gonna digress about some pet… I guess he’s talking about Luke Harper coming back to him… yeah yeah where’s the Shield??? Come down the stairs!!!

I guess the Shield can’t be bothered… lets continue the Divas revolution! See I like Becky & Charlotte, I hope they brukk up the Bellas.. it’s that Paige I’m not a fan of!

…and while they come down the ramp and get ready for their contest against the Bellas, check this exclusive interview that MIKE KNOXXX and GRANT BODY – P interviewed, the beautiful, sexy, don’t take no sh!t, former Tough enough competitor – Gabi Castrovinci! Don’t just look at her and wank off… CLICK THE PIC NUH MAN!!!!

11693889_10206409570616322_7326486061945163969_n247 days??? COME ON NIKKI!!! You can do it girl! If you don’t make it, I won’t be mad though… divas division stepped up!

I got this feeling somewhere down the road Triple gonna give Gabi a tryout anyway… he sees that uniqueness in her… You see? Winning Tough Enough ain’t sh!t!

OH SNAAAP! Becky Lynch use the DISARMOUR super move! Alicia Fox tapped out like a b!tch! Alicia in my bad books too!

Sheamus at ringside while Kevin Owens and Randall fight? Hmmm I think we know who gonna win this one! Unless of course Cesaro finds himself out here!

See Randall ain’t like John… Randall is more of that dark hero sh!t… Randall will f**k you up – Cena won’t!

Sheamus – you do realise I was sitting there waiting for you to interfere in  that match… so what stipulation you and Randall gonna have???

I knew Cesaro would get involved but it didn’t work out too well for him – pop-up powerbomb – BLAOW!!! Try again kid!

Ok main event time! John Cena Vs Seth Rollins! COME ON CENA!!! What – you thought Cena was gonna be in mid-card forever??? YOU DUMB RARSE!!!

Quote of the week – “If you’re a champion your ego should be out of control… look at Floyd Mayweather… he’s out of control… he’s never been beat…” (JAY-BEE) Let’s be real – from time Big Show couldn’t manage Mayweather, my dude Pacquiao couldn’t take him back in May! Yo Mayweather haters… you gotta make it burn!

Oh dear! Seth Rollins hit the Tiger Knee right into Cena’s nose – BLAOW!!! That should have been a Mortal Kombat X-Ray moment! Yeah the crowd would chant ‘This Is Awesome!’ because Cena nose brukk up!!!!

Go on muthaf***a, tell me this wrestling thing is fake…. oh that would be you CM Princess Peach B!tch!! That’s why I lost respect for that fool! And Cena just beat Rollins with a f**ked up nose!!! YES CENA!!! The respect I once had for CM Pnuk… is now handed over to Cena! What you gonna do now Rollins? You gotta defend your title at Summerslam!!! (Why have I got this feeling Rollins gonna get away again??? Either that or Sheamus cashes his cheque against Cena and win???

Quality wrestling contests, no sign of Undertaker & Brock (as I thought,) and no Hogan chants! WOW! maybe there is hope for humanity!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

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DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.

NEW STC LOGO 2015

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