Tag Archives: Cena

Monday Night Raw #1121: November 17, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer

You know what? Every year I delete the data from my WWE games off my PS3 to make space for the new one… for some reason one mind told me NOT to delete 2K14…. I’m glad I didn’t… now I’m hearing that the PS4/XB1 versions of the game ain’t all that either… like dayuuuuum! Seriously it might as well have been an upgrade like Street Fighter, where I downloaded the upgrade to Ultra Street Fighter IV and sh!t… don’t get me wrong, I like the game… but not able to put Ain’t No Grave to Undertaker’s entrance or Method Man’s ‘Kane’ to Kane’s entrance is unforgivable…not to mention NO LAYLA in the game… HEINOUS. 2K Games: GET IN THE CHAIR!!!!

Will the Authority survive? Or will the IWC be subject to Cena’s rule? Everybody, wants to rule the world… shout out to Tears For Fears…. RAW #1121! HOL’DAT -BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZNow we gotta deal with this grumpy cat… which I’m sure is WWE taking the p!$$ out of the IWC because what are they? GRUMPY! Yeah I said it! Don’t mistake me, Infamous Informer, Wolverhampton’s Last Outlaw, Grant Body – P! for one of YOUUUUUU!!!!

Oh no not the authority!! RAW opens with ANOTHER Team Authority segment???? Ok backing Team Cena! ARE YOU MAD???? After what Triple pulled last week…. LONG LIVE THE AUTHORITY!!!!

Ok Stephanie you just described Kane as sick and twisted monster… you gonna give him his mask??? You better!!!!!

Enough chat from Triple & Steph…. Ryback is out here – Feed Me More of that pu$$y Steph!


Why you bringing up old sh!t Steph? Footage of Cena running down Ryback and sh!t…. they had their beef back last year… I see what you tryna do Steph! Working brain and sh!t!!!

Ok Ryback playing that ‘Austin’ role… I’m on the side I’ve always been on, and that’s MINE!


YES!!! Patterson & Brisco start brukk up Ziggler! Rollins lick him down with the briefcase! The match nah start yet! THIS IS GREAT!

OH SNAP! It’s for the Intercontinental title and sh!t! Come on ref let’s go! Ring the bell damnit!

OH SNAP!!!! KISS MI NECKBACK! LUKE HARPER – NEW INTERCONTINENTAL….. CHAMPION!!!! WOOOOOOOO!!!!! I feel like dancing like Triple Teef and sh!t!

….and Seth Rollins – Curb stomp to Ziggler – BLAOW!!!!! WROOOOOOOOY!!!!! First Great Khali is let go, now Ziggler get buss arse! SHOUT OUT TO ICE CUBE!

Oh my god this grumpy cat is real! I thought it was a still picture that posted memes!

What is this? The Bunny wants a piece of Natalya??? Who gives a f**k about the Adam Rose/ Tyson Kidd match? well certainly not me! The Bunny got taste in women if you ask me!!!

Mi nah understand all this nonsense between Bray Wyatt & Dean Ambrose… f**k all that cryptic sh!t – just fight damnit! I do know this: Both of em are not all there in their headtop!

In Prisoner Cell Block, they call it Solitary. In WWE. they call it the doghouse! Talk sh!t, and you get f**ked up every week. In the case of Cesaro…. he’s about to be f**ked up by Ryback…

Will you three muthaf***az (Cole/Lawler/JayBee) stop talking about what would happen if the Authority loses at Survivor Series and call the damn match???? Two talented muthaf***az – Ryback and Cesaro and that’s all you mans can chat bout…. BLODCLART!!!

STC Survivor Series 2014

Lana, I am disappointed at you & Rusev, I thought you would have desecrated the US title by now and created a Russian title….

That is f**ked up – to advertise the Survivor Series that is FREE… while UK cats still have to pay £14.95 for that rarse!

Oh Lana just said SHUT-TUP to the fans…. my tingz stand up again!!! And Lana put the US on blast about Kim Kardashian showing her @$$ all over the internet! WTF?!!! Lana wants to show the world her topless pics??? Have we gone TV14 suddenly??? Well fear not, if Lana won’t show us… I WILL!!!


Heath Slater – WHERE ARE YOU GOING??? Send for the Accolade Rusev!!! If Swagger could beat him, Big E, Mark Henry, Big Show… what chance did you have???? You dyam arse!

Er Erick Rowan…that cat is not Renée Young….. er…. even Miz & Sandow look confused… making these Wyatt man look fool… they supposed to be scary and sh!t!

What’s Stephanie doing? She’s not about to trouble Big Show is she? Remember when she slapped him up and f**ked with him? She’s f**k!ng with him now….

WHOA!!!! Induct Big Show into the Hall of Fame 2015 if he steps down from Cena’s team? Think about it Show! Remember how Steph & Triple f**ked with you last year!!!

WTF? Suddenly Sheamus is an illegal citizen? Is this where you come in Zeb Colter? Well do your job jabroni! Oh that’s right – Rusev f**ked you up at Summerslam! YOU B!TCH!

Hang on – they fight for a championship opportunity? I thought Cena got that already! Nah I smell a rat here! Stephanie wukkin brain as usual to take down Team Cena… all this Authority dissecting sh!t they doing is only telling me that Team Cena gonna win at Survivor Series… I hope it’s not the case! But I’m not gonna tweet my displeasure at Triple! I’m not like you Internet Wrestling B!tches! All Stephanie has to do is give back Kane his mask! No need for this divide & conquer sh!t!!!

There you go! I knew full well neither was getting title shot! Rusev & Mark Henry out to finish the both of em! OH SNAP!!! Mark Henry setting up the announce table! Mark Henry with the world’s strongest slam to Sheamus – BLAOW!!! THATS WHAT I DO!!!!

I can’t lie Brie looks sexy dressed up as AJ!!!! GOD DAYUUUUM!!! Sorry Danny… and sorry Philip for that matter… I gotta send for the Cocoa Butter…GRANT THAT'S WHAT I DO


If you gonna chant CM P**K… you might as well chant Cena & Danny as well!

UH-OH!!! Was Brie meant to do that? Pin her sister like that??? Er that was cool considering she was meant to be Nikki’s assistant which was a ridiculous storyline if you ask me… and I love women! There is so much Nikki could have done… supposed to be hated but it only has guys wanting to f**k Nikki Bella even more!

Look at Brie celebrating like a fool with AJ on that Danny Bryan sh!t… AJ with a kick to the mid section of Brie… DDT into the canvas – BLAOW!!!

8 man tag team contest??? On Raw? Fatal 4 Way Tag Team Championship match at Survivor Series??? NO NO NO NO NO NO!!!!! It should be the other way round! Why call this sh!t Survivor Series? You might as well call it WWE…..er….WWE…. Fully Loaded or some sh!t like that! WWE wonders why the Smack Talk Centre ain’t organising sh!t til the Royal Rumble! But believe me when I say – that sh!t is gonna be OFF THE HOOK!!! THEY SHOOTING! AH MADE YOU LOOK!

Trust the Miz to act like a B!TCH! Tags MizDow, the crowd loves him. Then he tags himself back in instantly… I hope he gets BUSS ARSE!

So… if the Authority has f**ked up Cena’s team apart from Cena… who else gonna sign the contract for this match??? I wonder if Vincent Kennedy might come out and switch sh!t up??? Ok I’m probably asking too much…

What’s wrong with Triple Teef? he sounds worried and sh!t…. now he’s tryna convince himself – THEY…WILL…NOT…LOSE!!!

HA! HA! Triple don’t give me joke… looking for Cena’s ‘teammates’… We can’t see them!!!

Triple is killing me! He’s going to sleep through Cena’s promo!!!! He can’t do that!

HAHA! Ok that was funny… Cena says when he’s done with Rollins he will be cleaning toilets!!! HA! HA! I gotta rate Cena for trying to sway me to back his team!

Seems like it will take more than beat downs to take out Ziggler & Big Show – but here’s the twist – Eric Rowan has joined Cena’s team???? BACKSIDE!!!! So has Ryback!!! So wait there – Sheamus is out the game now…. what de rarse??!!! I should back Team Cena but I’m sorry – my hatred for Dolph Ziggler run deep – I can’t put it aside – plus two of my favourite dudes – Rusev & Mark Henry ride for the Authority… did Cena just put Triple TEEF through the announce table??? HE CAN’T DO THAT!!!!

He just did – BLAOW!!! Now I know Team Authority GOT THIS!!!!










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Monday Night Raw #1120: November 10, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer

First things first I, Poppa, freaks all the honeyz… er hang on wrong intro….

First things first man you f**k!n with the worst, I’ll…. er oh dear that’s not it either…

First things first, I, the Infamous Informer, Wolverhampton’s Last Outlaw, Grant Body – P! wants to give a shout out to STC members Billal Ilyaz and Charles King – they represented tonight in Liverpool England for RAW live… from what they’re saying without revealing spoilers, Raw was a good show.. well I’LL BE THE JUDGE OF THAT!!!!

No WWE Network so was it Judgment Day for the WWE in the UK? RAW #1120… HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZShout out to my newest hero Rusev – NEW WORLD WRESTLING FEDERATION U.S. CHAMPION!!!! I wonder if he’s thrown the belt in the bin yet?

OH SH!T!!! The UK have a song for Cena! JOHN CENA SUCCCCKS! JOHN CENA SUCCCCKS! Haha I’m not a Cena hater but that is brilliant!

Cena’s got another new muthaf***in shirt… there’s one for your WWE2K15 customisation…

For real? Zack Ryder was gonna join Team Cena? He’s out for 6 months? BEST NEWS I’VE HEARD SO FAR!


UK chanting for Ziggler…. damnit Authority f**k him up so he can be outta here for 6 months!

OH HELL NAW!!!! Cena calls out Ryback to talk Survivor Series plans… guess who has to come out…. TRIPLE TEEEEEF!

Stephanie looks sexy as usual but look who’s riding with the team! Mark Henry! They got Seth, Kane – er I mean Glenn, now Mark??? Cena got who? Ziggler? Swagger? Straight away I know who I’m backing! (I know Triple you gotta laugh! Cena’s team is WACK!!!!)

Hang on Stephanie you can’t use God Save The Queen for her new entrance??? And as for you Triple, did you call yourself GOD???? OH NO YOU DIDN’T!!!! BLASPHEMY!!!

For real? Mark Henry Vs Ziggler????? WICKED!!! I got my Mark Henry shirt on!!!!

Look at Stephanie bigging up Ryback??? Do you want his d!ck too???GRANT BENT ON DESTRUCTION


Jesus have mercy – did Cena just call Triple a WANKER???? He can’t do that???!!!

So what’s it gonna be Ryback? Authority or Cena? He ain’t afraid of no Authoritaah, but Cena pays for Nikki’s t!++!£$ – Ryback with a spinebuster to Cena – BLAOW!!!!

First match – Seth Rollins Vs Wack Swagger… curb stomp his b!tch @$$ Rollins!!!

While that’s happening – big up the Liverpool crowd – not only did they chant ‘Where’s Our Network?’ they also had a sign crossing out the $9.99 and in its place – £6.31!!! SUPERB!!!! Stephen Cooper they might not be as smart as you but you gotta give them credit for their sh!t!!!

I’m glad Rollins got to the ropes when Swagger got the Patriot Lock… Rollins can’t do the curb stomp and sh!t!

YES!!! Rollins Curb Stomped that muthaf***a through the canvas – BLAOW!!! THAT’S WHAT’S UP! Now if Mark Henry can take out Ziggler as well… that will make me a happy man!!!!

Yeah Seth – do it again! Curb stomp – BLAOW!!!

NO!!!! The announcers advertised the Network on UK shores! WWE just Curb Stomped us!!!! Unless you’re as clever as  Stephen Cooper or my ninja Shadfather who got the sh!t unofficially at £6.31!!!

GOD DAYUUUM ALICIA!!! Come here girl!!! Makes me think of that tune… Alicia needs some Gangsta Lovin’!

Naturally the UK are backing Paige… yes that no curves no batty no t!++y pale looking like she dead last week sketal!!! (You wouldn’t say no Grant…) Er… YES I WOULD!


YOU WHAT STEPHANIE? No politics in WWE??? So why does Glenn dress like he’s running for governor? Why did your moms run for senate twice, lose, thus making the product PG???? Stephanie you’re sexy as hell but even you’re not exempt….

Here’s my dude RUSEV!!!! The DON-DADA!!!! I’m surprised he hasn’t threw the US Title in the bin! It is a ceremony, so maybe he will do something heinous to that title??!!!

UK crowd chanting ‘Who Are Ya???’ SHUT-TUP!!!!

I’m sorry – That Russian anthem is powerful!!!! A lot better than that God Save the Queen sh!t!!!! But not as powerful as Jamaica Land We Love!


Oh we got a rematch for the US Title? Ok cool! Sheamus you are a don but I dunno fella!!!! Rusev is very powerful! Can he be overcome?

For the record, I’ve played as Rusev on WWE2K15… Rusev is the f**k!n man – OK?!!!!!

HOLY SH!T!!!! Rusev with a fall away slam to Sheamus on the announce table! That’s f**ked up!!!! Every week Rusev comes with a new skill! What did I say? RUSEV IS THE F**K!N MAN – OK!!!!

What is that Rusev is trying? a Guillotine choke? RUSEV – YOU ARE THE F**K!N MAN – OK!!!!!

Oh – TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!! Why the f**k did The Authority’s stooges f**k with Sheamus??? Rusev wins by count out – I get it – that Stephanie sent Patterson & Brisco to bait it up! (Grant they are Mercury and Noble – ) I know who the f**k they are – SHUDDUP!!

Shout out to STC’s Anthony Cardenas – who actually reminded me that Sheamus shut down Noble’s career! Have they got it pon di YouTube???

OH SNAP!!!! Bad Bwoy Rusev has joined Team Authority! That’s it – Cena team DEAD NOW!!!!

Ok we got some Los Jobberdore nonsense… I’m off to watch some babestation… this week… Charmaine Sinclair… one of my ex’s was built like her… I admit, I was intimidated… but I knocked out that pu$$@y! BANG! BANG! BANG!!!!

Charmaine Sinclair


MizDow is the f**k!n man! OK!!!! It takes a lot of energy to mimic the sh!t That idiot Miz be doing!

Cena’s ‘team is F**KED! Swagger is out the game… Ziggler & Cena  are thinking F********K!!! In comes Triple Teef… dancing and sh!t!!!!! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! I am backing the Authority 100%… if Triple & Stephanie keeps doing funny sh!t like that… why end it?

NOW THIS IS THE SH!T!!!! Now every time Ziggler comes out, those funny looking eyes comes on the screen and sh!t??? HA! HA! I LOVE THIS! Somebody else come to f**k up Ziggler! This gets better and better! But enough of that – here’s my GRANT THAT'S WHAT I DOdude Mark Henry! F**k David Vs Goliath – this ain’t no bible story, this is WWE muthaf***a!

Yes Mark! Throw the chair at Ziggler! F**K this match! F**K HIM UP! Oh sh!t – The Big Show???? DAMNIT! He’s joining Team Cena??? Well he got the Sean Price punch… that stands for something I suppose… I bet Danny Bryan & Roman Reigns… even Randall feels sick now… that would be the team right there!

So let me get this right so I can understand this: A new day is coming? So this is how Kofi Kingston and Xavier Woods are repackaged? as leaders of the sister act church choir? Ok where Big E at??? Mr Kick In The Door himself?

Now we got Sheamus joining Team Cena… Oh not bad!!!! Cena needs one more… hmmm… the only way you can get me to back your team Cena is if you call HIM…. or HIM…. but I cannot see that happening!

Nikki I am disappointed in you! You not using this slave thing to your advantage! Brie doesn’t seem unhappy in all honesty!

Why did Eric Rowan appear during Adam Rose’s match? ‘She’s not here…’ who you looking for Eric??? Oh I know…. (No not Sister Abigail you fools…) Renée Young!!!! I’m telling you he wants to put it in!!!!

Seems like the Authority are uneasy about Ryback… why have I got this feeling that is a TRICK Ryback playing Trick pon the Authority???

Ok – now I’ve seen everything! Dean Ambrose is afraid of Bray Wyatt! What I just saw was f**ked up! Wyatt knows about Ambrose’s past and sh!t!!!

Main event time! UK SING OUT!!! JOHN CENA SUCCCCKS! JOHN CENA SUCCCCKS! Best fan made theme tune since Kurt Angle’s ‘YOU SUCK’ if you ask me!!!!

That’s so f**ked up! Triple bans Cena from Ziggler from ringside in his match with Mark Henry but here in the main event the whole Authority comes out to support Ryback???? TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!!

Where’s Ziggler at? Sheamus? Big Show????? Come and support!

I’m surprised when Ryback threw Cena out the ring, the Authority including Triple Teef – didn’t stamp out Cena! He would have sure as hell done it in Attitude/Ruthless era!

Is it me or has Ryback improved his fighting style?!!!! Please forgive me for losing faith in you the first time Ryback… when everyone turned their back to support their loser CM P**k, I was still with you… but then you kept losing and losing and losing and losing and losing and losing and losing and losing and losing and losing and losing and losing and losing…

Why the f**k did Glenn come in the ring and teef? Now look w’happen… him and Ryback ketch up! Yeah – they all coming in the ring to stomp out Cena… but Cena’s massive and crew are coming through! About blodclart time!

Oh dear that didn’t last very long – World’s Strongest Slam to Big Show – BLAOW!!! Ha! Where’s Ziggler? I thought he was down with the team???

Hold on – SWITCH! Ryback – he calls himself the Big Guy – I call him the One Man Army Ason! Never been tooken out! He just single-handedly mashed up the Authority’s team! Oh dear Triple & Steph an’t be happy with that sh!t! Or are they? Oh that’s where your favourite battyboy was… getting beat down by Luke Harper! Turns round to the Authority like – Yo I’m down with the team!

OH SNAP!!!! I think the battle lines are drawn now!

Team Authority – Seth – Glenn – Mark – Rusev – Luke Harper


Team Cena – Cena – Ziggler – Sheamus – Big Show… and Ryback???

Early prediction – I’m calling it now – Survivor Series, but it looks like Authority got this in the bag… but the voices in his head will chat to him, he will appear and out of nowhere – RKO – BLAOW!!!!! Team Cena wins…Remember I told ya…








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Monday Night Raw #1115: October 6, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer

It’s true Worst Comes to Worst my peoples come first… I gotta play Uncle duties, I had to look after my nephew while a family funeral is happening out-of-town. Which meant I missed RAW, and after what, two, three weeks of RAW foolishness, WWE pulls one out the hat when I’m not watching live??? DAMNIT, DAMNIT! DAMNIT!!!!!

This is my version of the events as according to WWE.Com. RAW #1115! HOL’ DAT – BLAOW!

WWF PROPA TINGZSince when did you become a 2Pac fan Seth Rollins? All Eyes On Me, Me Against the World Sh!t???!!! All my enemies wanna kill me??!!! Thug Life Tattooed on my Belly??!!! He claims he loves it… well yeah – because you haven’t got BUSS ARSE yet that’s why!

Well Seth is either a 2Pac fan or a fan of Catwoman! This guy must have more lives than that b!tch! Every time Cena or Ambrose tries to get at him his legs did run! But not this time! Running into the crowd… what was The Shield known for apart from beating muthaf***az into the table? Yes – coming through the crowd – and that’s exactly what Ambrose did!

That’s it! BEAT HIM!!!! Oh goddamnit who sent the stooges down to break it up??? Hey Seth! Ever thought of running the 100 metres? I believe you can beat Usain Bolt!!!!


Word on the street is that idiot Ziggler lost his Intercontinental Championship Belt at the airport… So irresponsible! Vince – FIRE HIS B!TCH @$$!!! You got money to recuperate damnit!

…and that’s the man you IWC b!tches want to become WWE Champion? It’s never gonna happen now – the fool lost the IC Belt!

OH SNAP!!!!! Ziggler & the Usos – triple kick in the kisser of Stardust – BLAOW!!!! His full set of teeth should be coming out of his @$$ by now!

Oh no it’s ok – he found it… where do you IWC jabronies get your info from? STOP READING THE DYAM DIRT SHEETS!

What the f**k does Adam Rose look like? I’m sorry – I can’t support him… he looks like a battyman vampire! I shall speak no more about this.

WHAT? NO! Bo Dallas defeats my don Mark Henry again??? I mean this time Henry had criminal intentions… he wanted to f**k up Dallas this time, setting up the announce table and sh!t… I say do it anyway! And say – THAT’S WHAT I DO!!!

Be patient Henry… you’ll get him!

Hmmm… amusing…Cena says that he sees in Ambrose what no one else has: GUTS… why did he not say ‘ATTITUDE’??? I’m jussaying… Shout out to the attitards!!!

So STC’s Ian Cooper was right!!!! Cena Vs Ambrose at the Hell in the Cell PPV with the winner facing Seth Rollins? What do you make of that people??? I’ll tell you what – tune in this week on BDSIR NETWORK – STC From The UK Sat 1am UK time, 8pm EST!

“You said you could beat me with one hand tied behind your back…. COME ON HOT SHOT!!!” (Vince McMahon to Stone Cold Steve Austin, April 1998)

10469748_10204537437416929_5824888263508120328_nWell Brie Bella thought she could try the same thing against Summer Rae. With my sexy Layla on her side, surely Summer Rae can’t go wrong, right?

WRONG!!!!! I can’t believe you Summer! I thought you had skills? Disappointed ain’t the word!!!

Big ups to Brie though…. she’s keeping the YES movement alive! Her music is still wack though… I gotta go in the lab and find a suitable theme song for her… since I don’t fancy Brie like I do Layla, Rosa, Naomi, Lillian, Stephanie… it will take me a while to find that track…

How is Tyson Kidd gonna use Natalya as a shield to get away from Wack Swagger? What sort of stupidness is that???

HAHAHA! Tyson Kidd getting the better of Swagger and Tyson is like – HI FIVE Nattie! Natalya just kissed her teeth and walked away!!!

Big ups to Roman Reigns he’s on the mend… but let’s be real… that was a waste of satellite TV!


Oh snap! It’s Vladamir Putin’s Birthday! SALUTE THIS MAN!!!! Or maybe not…..


HA! HA! HA! HA! Lana don’t give me joke! The Big Show should be in prison like all of us???!!! For desecrating the Russian Flag? OH SH!T!!! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! We committed a hate crime!!!! Wait a minute – Lana baby girl – haven’t you being hating on the Americans for months now????!!!

I’m not American, but I would chant USA! Just to hear Lana say SHUT-UP!!! It turns me on….!!!!


Er… Rusev…. if Big Show has been suspended, why you calling him out so you can crush him???? Er… anybody in there??? (knocking your head to check if there is a brain in there!)

NOW THIS IS WHAT I HEARD ABOUT!!! The past few weeks, I’ve been yawning my @$$ off at RAW and watching Babestation at the same time. The ONE WEEK I miss Raw due to family commitments, and THE ROCK appears on RAW???!!! Did you IWC jabronies pick this up in the dirt sheets??? You think Lana is getting wet…. with perspiration???

Hit the link below after the jump:

The Rock went to Queens, Manhattan, The Bronx!!! That’s what I love about this dude – he knows his Hip Hop Origins!!!! That’s why I’m like – F**k The Rock haters!

Whoa -whoa- whoa – Rock??!!! You had one last borough to go to? You forgot Staten Island homes???? The home of A Better Tomorrow! In stores on Warner Bros records December 2, 2014!!!!!

This is the part where the crowd should be chanting – WU-TANG! WU-TANG! WU-TANG! WU-TANG!!!!

15,000+ strong in Brooklyn chanting HOLY SH!T! HOLY SH!T! HOLY SH!T!!!! upon Rock’s presence!

Look at The Rock looking up and down at Lana… do you think he’s gonna ‘fix his jeans’???

What the hell was Rusev blubbering on about??? – IT DOESN’T MATTER WHAT HE THINKS!!!!

OH SNAP!!! The Rock just quoted Jay-Z!!!! STC member Richard Selby is gonna love this!!!!

The Rock just slapped the sh!t out of Rusev!!!! He should have fixed his jeans to Lana though!!!!

You should have never told The Rock to Shut Up Lana! Now he got #SovietStreetWalker trending on twitter! Oh dear you know bad mouthing The Rock is baaaad news!!!

Right these are Anthony Benigno’s words: Not mine!

“With Alicia Fox now holding the coveted title of Paige’s Best Friend, it was only a matter of time before The Diva of Tomorrow and her batty BFF teamed up in an official capacity to torment the reigning Divas Champion, AJ Lee.”

I have an idea what ‘batty’ means over in the states, but in Jamaican terms batty means bottom, @$$.. backside… that sort of thing. you put ‘man’ at the end of batty and well a picture of Adam Rose or Darren Young or Dolph Ziggler will appear in the dictionary!


What the rarse is this Emma doing? All this dancing nonsense? This ain’t Strictly Come Dancing fool??!!! This ain’t ballet?!!! This is WWE woman!!!! Look at AJ Lee… frustrated and sh!t… a fine woman like that should not be frustrated???????!!!!!

So w’happen, has Cesaro & Miz switched dance partners? Now The Miz could be fighting Sheamus for the US Title, while Cesaro could be fighting Ziggler for the IC? Meanwhile the crowd love Damien Sandow! Expect a face turn from Sandow somewhere down the road. The fans love his ‘stunt double’ antics!

Right IWC! F**k what you think you know. Last week, you assumed that Luke Harper is going solo… This week, that cryptic promo was as f**ked up as they come with Eric Rowan! The GRANT SAYS THIS: Don’t try to work it out… and that pregnant vision was mad disturbing… I think that all it is, is that the Wyatt Man dem have put extra creativity behind them… and it’s worries for everyone in the mid-card division at least!

You see what happen when you farce yourself in next man business Cena? Now Ambrose has gone to get a hot dog or two… and you’re there getting timberland boot stomped out by Randall, Seth and Glenn…

Wait a minute – I thought Ambrose went for a hot dog? He’s back and he’s brought the cart with him!!! I guess Cena, Glenn, Randall & Seth are hungry too… all that wrestling they be doing…

Oh hang on!!! He got ketchup & mustard as his artillery? Er… Randall… Glenn… turn back! You don’t want none of that!

Told ya!!! My fallen hero Kane & the evil Randall went from setting people on fire and ‘killing legends’ to being squirted with mustard & ketchup… To quote The Streets: Has It Come To This????

Oh lawwwd that must sting! Ambrose throwing a hot tub of onions over Rollins backbone!!! You know the onions have ben in that hot oil and sh!t!!!

OH SNAP!!!!! Ambrose use the spatula thing and clamped Rollins in his seedbag! Oh that’s it now – Sex life DUN!!!

Since I never saw this live, I can’t exactly judge this show… what I can say though… is The Rock’s appearance alone makes RAW automatically was better than the past two or three weeks… and I suppose WWE knew their ratings were in trouble… so they hit the emergency glass button! THAT’S WHAT HAPPENED!

RUSEV & LANA: Shame on you, when you step through to – the Ol’ Dirty Bastard – BROOKLYN ZOO!!!








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The Infamous Informer

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Monday Night Raw #1114: September 29, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer


WELCOME EVERYONE TO WWE RAW: JUDGMENT DAY!!!! We are live from a sold out Chicago crowd! And they are all pumped up and ready, chanting for the guy I like to call Philippa Brukk!!! Infamous Informer here on commentary taking you through the next 3 hours and 15 minutes of wrestling action!




And they’ve started! Oh snap! Stephanie is putting the QUITTERS on blast!!! See how she switches it up to Dean Ambrose though!!!! HA! HA!

May Paul Heyman interject??? Will he mention Phillipa’s name blatantly?!!! Nope he’s gonna talk about BRRROCCK LESSSNAR!

Well Seth Rollins is right…. no one wants to see Cena win the title, but by claiming that Brock Lesnar is the ‘BEST’, the crowd took that as an insult to Philipa…

So Seth is like, Ambrose, give back the briefcase with my cheque in there… Ambrose appears on-screen… he’s like – if yuh tink say your name bad man, come fe it nuh? And according to you IWC b!tches, John Cena just had to steal the limelight from Ambrose by attacking Rollins… I dun explained to you how Cena is in this storyline… y’all just hating… so The Grant Says – SHUT THE F**K UP!

HA! HA! Jamie Noble gives me joke! He wants  some sledge hammers to aid in retrieving the briefcase… you know NO-ONE wields that thing except for Triple TEEF!!!!

I’m glad Ziggler has killed that noise he was going on with R-Truth… Cesaro you are a don, I hope you defeat The Miz & Ziggler in this Triple Threat Match for the Intercontinental Championship… babestation ain’t saying nuthin either… I guess it’s a quick game of Tekken!

Side note – I’m glad that this will be the last episode of Raw I’ll be watching via stream… this Wednesday – let’s get that Network! HEY! It better not be no £9.99! charge us the same you charge the states! No funny business knowing this dyam country!

In fact f**k Tekken – let’s post this pic of Stephanie with her fine self… just for no reason!

Steph Raw Chicago

Actually this wrestling contest is not bad! Plenty pinning predicaments! Great counter techniques! But damnit, Cesaro hit the Sho-ryu-ken on The Miz, Ziggler kicks down Cesaro and takes advantage of the pin and defends his title…

So who are these guys? Jamie Noble & his bredrin? Are they the new Patterson & Brisco??? HAHAHAHAHA!!!


It’s okay people, my girl Sophia Lares is back on babestation… she’s on standby for when RAW comes with some stupidness…

I’m sick of stupid muthaf***az running up my inbox while RAW is on… what the f**k do they want at this time of night? Worse than that – I get someone running up my inbox telling me to ‘like’ his profile picture… I ain’t no battyman – get the f**k outta here with that sh!t!

WTF was that all about with The Wyatt Family? Most notably Luke Harper? What is this – a singles career launch??? Answers on a postcard please – Tweet me @MZATheInfamous, or hit us up at our FB group –http://www.facebook.com/groups/smacktalkcentre – Request To Join – Don’t Be a Weirdo!

Jesus have mercy LAYLA!!!! My god you look so f**kable! What’s this I hear – you have a new boyfriend???? I’m gonnaGRANT & LAYLA WWE2K15 find him… and SKIN HIM ALIVE!

Yo Jerry Lawler you still got it for lyrics! ‘Love is Grand, Divorce is 100Grand!’ I ought to remember that!

OH SNAP!!! Rosa’s extensions fell out her headtop!!! She might be the star of Total Divas, but this is RAW – where Layla is my star!!

Is it me, or does Dean Ambrose entrance music sound like that Puff Daddy tune??? Me cyan’t remember the name of it… I think it was for some film or something…

Oh snap! Ambrose is having a Chicago clearance sale??? He can’t do that surely?

WOW!! the crowd are chanting for someone other than Philipa Brukk!!!

Come on Patterson & Brisco!!! Do your job and get the briefcase!!!

Oh hang on… reinforcements!!! Looks like Ambrose wants no problems with these guys he calls ‘rosebuds’…. he’s going back up the stairs Shield style… he’s like – Seth Rollins – take your briefcase…what I wanna know is – why did Seth open that thing???? OH SNAP – what is that slimy sh!t coming out that messed up Rollins good suit??? He’s lucky it’s that and not what happened to The McMahons & the Spirit Squad back in 2006!

Even Randall & Glenn are laughing about it!!!! OH SH!T!!

First Swagger, now you wanna f**k with Mark Henry, Bo Dallas??? You don’t want to do that sir!!! Say what – Close the Hall Of Pain????? That’s only gonna keep the Hall Of Pain open BIG TIME!

Say what? Bo Dallas defeated Mark Henry???? What in the flying f**k???!!!!!

Shocked Undertaker 21-1 face2THAT’S NOT WHAT YOU DO HENRY???!!!! 

Suddenly Undertaker’s WrestleMania streak is irrelevant… Mark Henry lost to Bo muthaf***!n Dallas???? Oh HELL TO DA NAW!!!

That’s more like it!!!! Henry just f**ked up Bo Dallas backstage!!! Now THAT’S WHAT I DO!!!

Oh I get it…. will this Bella feud end in an I Quit match??? Hmmm….. I know y’all not interested… now putting Cameron & Eva Marie up against Brie Bella… is it REALLY a handicap match? If Tamina and Alicia Fox came out then I’d say yeah for sure…

Now look what you Bellas have done! Got the crowd chanting for JBL, Jerry Lawler & Michael Cole! Well it’s better than Philipa…. you know what? I think the crowd are finally come to terms with the truth… Note – AJ Lee hasn’t come out yet… was it a move by WWE for AJ Lee NOT to appear on Raw??? Or was it AJ Lee that thought – f**k that – I’m not about to bust my @$$ (Literally) out there only for the crowd to chant for a man who crosses his legs and whines like a b!tch… oh wait…. that’s my man…


So hold on… Adam Rose & the Bunny are on commentary? And we got Slater, Gator and mini gator (Hornswoggle)? The Bunny actually has a WWE profile??? Ok this is the part where I watch babestation… F**K that – Chant Philipa’s name! You have my permission!

You gotta problem with Hip Hop JBL???? You gotta problem with me!!! Don’t let me come down there and Timberland Boot Stomp your @$$!

People are loving the Big Show! You know why? Because on Smackdown, Big Show punched Rusev through school buses! PPPPPPPP!!!! I’ve missed that super-move!

Hold up – Rusev can speak English??? Since when???!!!! SHUT UP!!!!

Rusev don’t want none of Big Show….after all that talk of breaking every bone in his body??? Rusev you got no barz!!!

OH NO! Big Show just pulled down the Russian flag! He can’t do that???? Big Show gonna be in trouble for sure! (yes I know Jericho, you disrespected the Brazilian flag and you got in trouble…)

NO Cena you didn’t just say that!!!! You can’t say Chicago is your type of town??!!!! That must sting!!!! I love the darts being thrown by the WWE superstars!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

But I gotta agree with Ambrose… the beef started with him & Rollins… it’s not your fight really… I mean it is to an extent but it’s so personal with Ambrose… so stop stealing Ambrose’s Yam & dumpling and get your own sh!t… you love your fruity pebbles don’t you? And by the way… your T-shirt is WACK! I don’t care if it’s promoting Cancer research or whatever!


OH SNAP!!! AJ LEE IS HERE!!!! Is she gonna cut a promo??? Nope, she’s gonna fight! Better get my ear plugs…

Well Paige don’t want none of AJ Lee… so she sent Alicia Fox after her! er AJ… if I was you I would lose this fight…. and she has!!! Alicia hasn’t gotta go crazy all over Chicago!

Oh Lawwwd they beat down AJ Lee in Chicago… shot after shot after shot at Philipa… this is WWE firing shots at dude like his name is Scarface when he took 50 licks!

Shock! Horror! Now we gotta wait til NOVEMBER 1, for the WWE Network! Blodclart!!!! David Cameron what the f**k did you do??? I mean, WWE2K15 comes out at the same time! I’m going to see Common Live on London at that time! I don’t think it’s gonna work out….

Shout out to Hulk Hogan and all the ladies in the world that are putting boots2breastcancer…Show the world that you are proud of your t!++!£$! Don’t let the evil cancer take away your t!++!£$! We love your t!++!£$, and so should you!

It’s kinda funny how Glenn complains about Seth starting fires and he has to put em out… you see? My Hero Kane STARTS FIRES!!! I HATE GLENN DAMNIT!!!

I like Dean Ambrose’s hoodie… got that Anarky feel to it…. then you got the total opposite, Mr Fruity Pebbles himself…. considering it’s breast cancer awareness month, in the case of Cena, THE MILK’S GONE BAD!!!!


Well well, Seth Rollins shut down another main event…. oh f**k!nhell look at Cena and Ambrose fighting over who should f**k up Rollins…see that’s what happens when you on that bullsh!t – RKO, CHOKESLAM, THEN A CURB STOMP – BLAOW!!!! Both Cena & Ambrose laid out, crowd chanting ‘Thank you Rollins’, and NO returning star… no Batista, no Bryan, no Philipa Brukk…. NOBODY… y’all been reading them muthaf***!n dirt sheets too much, and now y’all not smiling… YES, NOBODY’S SMILING… except ME!!! WHOEVER LOSES, I WIN BIATCH!!!!








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Monday Night Raw #1112: September 15, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer


85%ers… I just quoted Supreme Mathematics. Only the 5% know what I just did here. 10% IWC b!tches step back and continue eating your monosodium glutamate, and polysorbate and drunk grape concentrate, with sodium benzoate!

Sorry I’m a Champion, as we enter the Night of Champions! RAW #1112! Hol’Dat – BLAOW!

WWF PROPA TINGZNo messing about! Paul Heyman’s here! John Cena is here! Is Brock Lesnar here? because if not, it’s YO @$$ PAUL HEYMAN!!!! Cena said he will F**k you up!

Haha Heyman made Cena look fool!!!! Look at him! Waiting for Brock for a fight like a dyam arse! Well – Brock’s private jet is delayed – Cena – KICK HIS F**K!N @$$!!! Don’t wait til no halftime Cena – KICK HIS @$$! Why has Cena got Heyman in a headlock??? Stop this nonsense Cena! I’d be throwing fists and fire on Heyman! Hey I’m a big Heyman fan… but it’s like this – if Brock comes and f**ks you up Cena, it’s your fault… just like you let Nikki Bella freeze her eggs, when there are nuff man out there dying to be a father! They’d shoot up her club in a heartbeat!

Oh snap – GREAT BOOKING BY JOHN CENA!!! Heyman locked away in Cena’s locker room, guarded by the not so Great Khali! Remember back in the days? I think it was 2007 when the not so Great Khali tried to squeeze Cena’s head top and kill him? How times have changed…

Look at this… Chris Jericho Vs ‘Glenn’… did Mike Cole just call him the Big Red Monster? I see no monster, I see a big bumblehead fool in school trousers!

If my hero Kane wrestled as Jacob Goodnight… even Bray Wyatt would see his white trousers turn yellow! WWE Creative simply have no sense sometimes!

Great win for Jericho, another loss for Glenn. I love Kane, hate Glenn. CHU!!!

You mean to tell me Mark Henry has athletes sending video messages supporting him in his fight against Rusev? Oh man Mark best not let his people down… all this police brutality, all sorts of sh!t…. he got more weight on him than Wack Swagger, who is fighting against Bo Dallas… and I BO-Lieve Dallas can win!

I like that chant going on! WE-THE-PEOPLE – – – WE BO-LIEVE!!!! I BO-LIEVE!!!! Come on kid! You are an inspiration to us all!

Good adding on to his Arsenal… Bo Dallas putting hand on his heart saying – WE BO-LIEVE before coming off the top ropes! NICE! It’s a shame he didn’t connect with the knee drop though…

OH F**K – Dallas taps out to the Ankle Patriot lock…. DAMNIT…. no more victory lap for Dallas now…. B@$+@rd!!!

COMING NEXT! Brie & AJ Lee combine their force against Paige & Nikki! Who am I backing? I care not… Whoever Loses, I WIN! I wonder, is

The MAN in the PURPLE SUIT!this the part where Brie finds herself in the divas championship match???

F**K it – I hate this skipping sh!t! If I ever catch my baby girl skipping like its yellow brick road– our relationship is OVER!

Oh dear – Brie – you got no skills, or as my sis would say, Brie you got no barz! Your @$$ ain’t going in that title match! Paige with the Rampaige super move… Brie couldn’t get up after that…and then after the match Nikki Bella shuts Brie down with her torture rack super move – BLAOW!!!

I’m sorry Shadfather but the Great Khali could win star of the week here! I can’t believe Paul Heyman tried to escape out of the locker room to call his client… but Khali brukk up Heyman’s phone! Oh no! How is Heyman gonna tweet his followers???

Where is Vincent Kennedy when you need him? Mike Cole just did an epic fail – he called John Cena – The world’s largest athlete??? You got two choices Cole – BE FIRED or the alternative…. GET IN THE CHAIR!!!! Better than that – Where’s the Rock? So he can put his most electrifying T-Shirt over Cole’s foolish head top????

LAWWD have mercy! The Big Show! 7ft 2! The Big Show! 441lbs! Double chokeslammed The Wyatt Bwoy into the canvas – BLAOW! That should have went through the ring tuh blodclart!

Big up the Uso brudda! I like that these guys have had an incredible run with the tag titles… it took them so long to capture the titles and even I thought they would have dropped em sooner… more power to em!

Was that ANOTHER Epic Fail by Mike Cole? He just asked Jay-Bee and Lawler – ‘Did Cody just meow’??? I thought his name was Stardust??? I thought Cody Rhodes didn’t exist????? (Obviously in storyline terms IWC don’t get your dirty Y-Fronts in a twist!)

If Raw starts at 8pm EST, 1am UK, isn’t 9:30pm EST 2:30am UK HALFTIME???? Cena said if Brock doesn’t show up by half time Heyman will get f**ked up… well it’s halftime now!!! I see no Brock…. Cena – KICK HIS F**K!N @$$!!!!!

STC NOC BANNER The Uso Brudda, The Dust Brudda, Sheamus & Cesaro always put on great matches, if you not down with the Night of Champions card this Sunday… I’ll take that wrestling card!!!! Now go over there and watch the only way is Essex… you dumb rarse!


Theodore-Long-With-Renee Word on the street is that Jericho is leaving again after Night of Champions…. and the announcers are making a big deal out of Randall kicking Jericho in his head costing him a few months of his career…why have I got that feeling that Randall is gonna do it again???


Don’t waste time Cena! Stop chat – drop 16 suplexes on his @$$! I don’t care if he’s a 49-year-old father of 2, I don’t care if he’s acting with the benefit of intellect…. KICK HIS @$$!!!

Even the crowd want you to whupp his @$$! oh no…. Heyman got in your head…. goddamnit!!!! HERE COMES THE PAIN! HERE WE GO!!!

After mad mind games…. you know Brock the Conqueror couldn’t resist… he got in the ring… one German Suplex – BLAOW! Cena is like – OH SNAP! But Brock turn his back give Cena, Next minute Cena rushes Brock! Fist and fire! left’s and rights! Is Nikki getting wet backstage??? Is she thinking – f**k this egg freezing sh!t, I’m gonna jump on his d!ck and my vaginal walls is gonna trap him!!!!


That’s it Mike Cole – give the kids hope, because come Night of Champions… the Conqueror, BRRROCK Lesnar… is gonna brukk up Cena’s clart! I call it the battle between Kenshiro and Raoh the Conqueror in Fist Of the North Star!

fist-of-the-north-star-kens-rage-2kenshiro_vs_raohSo Cameron isn’t going to NXT after all? She’s gonna fight Naomi right here and now…. excuse me while I shed tears….

Good style out by Cameron when she pinned Naomi’s breasts to the mat instead of her back for the pinfall! HA! HA! Girl you don’t need to go to NXT!!! But that Sasha Banks though…. She and Cameron would make a great team!

There’s chants for Naomi! while Cameron has improved her fighting style! What sort of submission was that from Naomi??? WHOA!!!! Everytime I see Naomi fight she adds another move to her style! Give this woman the belt NOW!!!!! Well let her fight the winner between AJ, Nikki and Paige first…

I heard about this – Ziggler got his stunt double…. R-Truth…. I am DISGUSTED. I have lost respect for R-Truth, wearing pink brief and shaking his @$$…. F**k this… I’m off to watch babestation…. I’m a fan of that Sophia Lares lady… good gawd almighty!


Did Seth Rollins just make a racist gesture about Roman Reigns???? Acting like a gorilla and sh!t????!!! OH HELL NAWWW!! I didn’t think that was funny. Roman – F**K him up!!! He might as well have said, Roman, I’m coming for you n!**@!

So wait there… if we are getting Seth Rollins Vs Roman Reigns now… does that mean at Night of Champions they will fight again in a stipulation??? I hope that is so!

F**K it Roman – get disqualified – Rollins made a racist comment about you and your Samoan heritage… send for the steel chair and beat his backside!

Oh blast – a victory by Reigns in a straight up wrestling contest…. GOD DAMNIT…. I HATE WRESTLING MATCHES!!! Only joking! I just think that when stars cut a promo where they say certain things about their opponent, I expect that sh!t to be delivered you feel me?

Interesting booking by WWE – Rusev & Mark Henry segment last???? Why is this? Is Mark Henry gonna strip Lana naked or something? (PG GRANT) GOD DAMNIT!!!! Lana would be crazy in TV-14 mode! She is Debra 2.0.! Let the truth be told! She has mastered d!ck teasology 101!


The question remains – will the crowd support Mark Henry like they did Wack Swagger? You dun know me, Mike Knoxxx and Spotface will be watching this closely…

As much as I love the ‘What?’ chant…. the crowd doing this against the man who is supposed to be supporting the States?

Oh no! Lana put Mark Henry on blast!!!! He failed in the 1992 Olympic games! And Lana showed the true champion he represented Russia! OH SNAP!!! Dayuuum Henry how you gonna come back from this?

By pledging allegiance to the flag???? Well yeah but NO! Rusev tries to attack Henry!!! But Check it – Rusev, tries for the Accolade super move! Henry fights out of it! Sets up Rusev – Sit out chokeslam – BLAOW!!! Is that a new super move???? I hope so! He’s gonna need it! Henry made a promise to not let his people down! YES!!!! THAT’S WHAT I DO!!!!! I need to send for my Mark Henry shirt on Sunday and represent!!!!










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Monday Night Raw #1111: September 8, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer

I love this song… but I hate Domestic Violence to the CORE. A man who hits a woman, is not a MAN. From that day forward, that man becomes a B!TCH. That’s what I think of you RAY RICE. I have seen it too many times too so many women that I care for. At the same time, that’s what happens when women think bad guys carry the swing. Yes they carry a bat that will swing to your face! See that’s why they don’t condone that sh!t in WWE now… it used to be ‘cool’ in TV-14 standards with women going through tables and women getting tombstoned into the concrete floor. Big ups to the Baltimore Ravens for kicking that b!tch @$$ out of their team. He instantly gets the Official DYAM ARSE AWARD… Raymond Mourice Rice: GET IN THE CHAIR!!!! AND SHUDDUP!

I hope Jerry Springer brings Steve out with him to sort this Bella madness out… RAW #1111: HOLD DAT – BLAOWWWW!!!


World Wrestling Federation

Say what? We just gonna have the steel cage match now??? Ok here we go!!!! Bray Wyatt! Chris Jericho!!! Somebody’s gonna get buss arse in that muthaf***a!

Did Bray just say – Baltimore: We’re Here??!!!! Expect a heel to throw shots at Mr Rice…

Jericho: remember what I told you last week about bringing a steel chair with you??? Why didn’t you bring it? Dude – you gon lose – Wyatt got his fam with him… if the mighty John Cena could not defeat him, I’m afraid I’ve got some baaaad news..

LAWWD HAVE MERCY!!!! Chris Jericho, climbing to the top of the cage… ready to escape but the fam ain’t having it, so what does he do? jumps off and splashes onto Bray Wyatt! MAAAAAAD!!!

But as Jericho tries to escape through the door, Wyatt mounts on top of him beating him down, and yes, that didn’t look right! Somehow Wyatt wins, but they want to destroy Jericho!!! NO!!! Destroying the injured knee of Jericho, then dragging his carcass back in the ring… Sister Abigail – BLAOW!!!!! DAYUUUM!

Now Randall wants to destroy Roman Reigns, by Triple’s permission! “What does he mean?” Asks Mike Cole…. YOU DUMMY – He’s gonna kick Reigns in his head!!!! He might draw for the hammer himself! Handcuff Reigns to the ring and brukk him up! What did you think he meant you BIG DUMMY!

Oh no Dolph ‘battybwoy’ Ziggler? F**k this sh!t… I’m gonna check on my washing!

…or maybe not… exposing photos of The Miz on some faggotry is entertaining…. hang on – The Miz will sue all of us if we republish the photos???? Isn’t that a shot at CM P**K being a b!tch over those wedding photos… like my dude RZA said… if you don’t want those personal photos exposed on the internet… DON’T TAKE THEM!

The internet is a public domain…. use COMMON SENSE!

My favourite diva of the moment is here! Dayuuuum Rosa Mendes… here’s hoping for another wardrobe malfunction! She teams with Natalya’s sexy @$$ going against AJ P**K and that pale looking Paige…. she look like she died last week and sh!t!


The Informer With Cage Amateurs UK Tshirt

Big ups to the women chanting for AJ Lee… acknowledging her existence properly, not like the chi-chi man in attendance! Rosa – you should have tagged Nattie… what the hell’s wrong with you? You tryna prove something – so far you’re proving that you’re worse than Eva Marie!

What the rarse??? What the hell did Randall do that for? What did Jericho do to you Randall? Beat down Jericho for no reason! So what if it’s the muthaf***!n season première???? I don’t give a f**k! there’s no off-season in WWE you big DUMMY!


Yet I walk thee in the shadow of Cenation, I shall fear no Thuganomics!!!! Heyman has done it again!!! Lyric of the week!

Paul Heyman just revealed the secret formula to defeat Brock Lesnar! What you do Cena… is TURN EVIL!!! But we know that ain’t gonna happen! Cena drops a dissertation to Heyman on why he can never turn evil… same story – for the kids, for the people who fight for his country…. Remember what I said earlier, that a heel would take a shot at the Baltimore Ravens… that man turned out to be Paul Heyman! To think…. that Kane tried to tell Cena… Roddy Piper tried to tell him, and now Paul Heyman… if arguably the greatest wrestling manager of all time can’t convince Cena, y’all Cena haters might as well abandon hope. Eat, Sleep, Be John Cena, Repeat…that’s why I don’t jump on the Cena hating bandwagon, I don’t follow sheeple. I’m the Infamous Informer, Undertaker fan to the end, Ziggler hater, The Rock is my inspiration… and I Never Change!


Who you know like Grant????

Damn Lana you have a lovely singing voice…. we gotta get Lana to sing the national anthem for WrestleMania 31! And I like the Russian national anthem! It’s very catchy if I do not say so myself! Listen to the passion behind the Russian singers! SHOW SOME RESPECT DAMNIT! Look at Jerry Lawler and JBL… dem bex!!!! HA! HA! HA!

NXT Takeover looking BIG! I wanna see this KENTA dude… he sounds like an OFFICIAL BAD MAN!!! The last PPVs were crazy! I wanna see this Charlotte Flair fight as well…

BACKSIDE!!! NXT TAG TEAM ACTION ON RAW!!!! YO I CAN’T WRITE…. I’ll be back in a few minutes…

BUMBACLART!!!! This Adrian Neville is a bad man! That Red Arrow super move is INSANE!!! I’ve seen Sami Zayn fight before…Excellent strategy Triple TEEF! Put your NXT mans on Raw to promote the PPV! THE GRANT SAYS – SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY!!!!

Enough of that sh!t…. it’s time for Jerry Springer!!! I’m a Maury guy myself… but neither Bella is pregnant and no one is the father, so I can’t see Cena or Danny doing any dancing any time soon…

Jerry springer BellaWait a minute – Jason is the security guard? Where’s Steve???? He was the man!!!!

Brie Bella got new entrance music! It sounds like some Cheryl Cole sh!t!!! Anyway moving on…

Nikki I’m disappointed in you! Why did you go fist and fire with your sister on some vintage Jerry Springer sh!t?!

What de rarse??? The parents involved via satellite, the brother is now in the ring? Stop this nonsense and get it over with and fight!

Oh snap! Springer is hurt! Where’s the security??? Maybe he was a dutty bwoy and letting the Bellas fight! The security should be fired!!!! Steve would never let that happen… he’d make sure he’d grab one of the Bella’s by her breasts and break up the scuffle! We couldn’t even get a Final Thought from Jerry…. maybe Jeremy Kyle is the one that can sort it out! Jerry ain’t getting any younger! Jeremy cusses his ignorant guests and feels no way!

WWE send their condolences to Joan Rivers….She did her thing in WWE back in the day…but The Grant Says – F**K JOAN RIVERS!!! Word is she disrespected the Palestinians on some bullsh!t… you have to pay penalties for that sh!t word up!

I gotta question, if the bunny from Adam Rose’s party crew drops the super kick on Heath Slater and jumps off the top ropes and splashes on Titus, does that make him the next Shawn Michaels???? If not then you wrestling fans are retarded as hell! Doph Ziggler does that same sh!t – but you call him the next Shawn Michaels???? DISRESPECT!

Why have I got this feeling that the cage is gonna come down on Randall & Roman Reigns and Randall is gonna proceed to f**k up Reigns in the cage?

That’s it – rights and lefts from both men…none of this elbow tie-up crap! BRING THE RUCKUS!

Damn steel steps are everywhere! I don’t think Randall is out to win this match… it’s all about f**k!n Roman up!

WTF is this! TEEEEEEEF!!! Seth is out here, Glenn is out here, what did I say??!!! The cage ah come down!!!!! SOMEBODY GONNA GET F**KED UP TONIGHT!!!

MY GOD NO!!!! Seth Rollins, from the top of the cage! Landing on Reigns! Glenn with the chokeslam! Randall with a vicious assault with the chair! Then Seth with that Curb Stomp to Reigns headtop – BLAOW!!! OH LAWWWD Reigns dead now!

Reigns… you know what you gotta do? Take them out, one by one? Learn from your older cousin, watch what he did… if you do this next week… you are sure to succeed…









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Monday Night Raw #1105: July 28, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer

Dayuuuuuuuuuuuuum! What the rarse did I wake up to this morning??? Spike TV can’t take this sh!t no more with Total Nonsense Atrocious Wrestling? No doubt, they made an ‘IMPACT’ alright, on the media and the IWC!!! Now all the WWE Fan Boys are hoping that TNA meets its end, they stole Triple and Undertaker’s shovel and they have worked hard to dig the grave! The real wrestling fans are concerned for all the talent that is there as their future hangs in the balance…by this Thursday coming… we will know for sure! Poor Danny Bryan, he just helped put a criminal to justice, and now his glory means nothing… similar to his WWE title reigns…

We are in for a big week in wrestling y’all… with that said, get me my BIG PIECE OF CHICKEN!!!! RAW #1105! HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZWord on the street is that Stephanie McMahon has invited Brie Bella to Raw!!! My love for women is untold, and I am so invested in this storyline! It’s hotter than John Witherspoon’s hot sauce… hell, it’s hotter than Lana!!! YEAH I SAID IT!


When the start of Raw involves divas in Brie Bella & Stephanie, YOU KNOW sh!t is going down!

Since Raw last week had NO Cena, this week let’s start with him…. is it the toughest challenge for Cena??? I dunno man… he has defeated Brock before…but Brock brukk the streak – from you do that…. Cena is in trouble now!


There you go! Cena told ya! He defeated the beast back in 2012!!!! Cena belie- no sorry – BO-Lieves he can win!!!!

Not according to Paul Heyman…. Cena will be BEATEN! Cena will be VICTIMISED! Cena will be CONQUERED!!!!

Ok Cena got real talk for Heyman…. oh yes the passion… he promises Heyman that he’s walking out with this sunovab!tch!!!! (Poor Austin impression Cena but… what the hell!)

COUNTERACTION BY CESARO!!! I know he didn’t just tell Cena straight that he CAN’T WRESTLE!!! Understand what Cesaro just said people! Cesaro just said what the Anti-Cena attitards have been typing on their keyboards for years!!!! Do you realise that the Anti Cena Attitards are clenching their penises and thrusting away until they damage their monitor right now???!!!!


Cesaro, on a mission… to out wrestle Cena all over Houston! If Cena defeats Cesaro right now….oh boy oh boy… how crazy would that be? But if Cesaro actually defeats Cena? That would be HUGE!!! You know the rules WWE! defeat the champion in a non-title match, he’s the #1 contender straight away!

Oh man this is one of those matches where Cena has to draw for moves he don’t use!!!! Like he did with Sandow, like he did with CM P**k!

An FU (AA) off the top ropes – BLAOW!!!!! Cesaro is main event ready if you ask me! All he needs is a compelling storyline! Ok all you Anti – Cena attitards – shut the f**k up… you don’t know the meaning of the word ‘buried’!!!! If Cena dropped the FU on your b!tch @$$ you ain’t getting up!

Oh dear! Triple tried to be reasonable with Randall… Triple is right – Randall you cannot have a title shot with Cena because 1 – No one wants to see that sh!t – and 2 – Roman Reigns already said he’s gonna f**k you up every chance he gets! And then after him, he’s going after Triple! With that said – if Randall fights Roman Reigns at Summerslam I’m calling it now – Roman Reigns will LOSE because Triple TEEF is gonna f**k it up!

…and the masturbating continues!!!! This time for good reason… Paige is in the building… with that horrible @$$ voice…I’m sorry…. for a 21-22 year old??? She sounds more like 52!!!!

Now the masturbating continues for bad reason… the CM P**k chants continues while AJ Lee was in the ring…. f**ks sake!!!

Oh hell naw!!! Paige why you call AJ crazy for??? You know what happens when you call that girl crazy??? You know what AJ, you might as well learn the Anaconda Vise submission and the GTS supermove…. if you do that…you might cure these wrestling nerds of this problem! The man is straight edge for god sake… he promotes being clean, and not taking drugs, yet these wrestling fools are ADDICTED to chanting for a man who cares not for them! Something wrong with that picture if you ask me!

What’s up Steph?!!! You don’t look yourself…. you escaped getting cigarettes for Bea Smith didn’t you? You avoided playing the ‘scissor game’GRANT - BODY - P with Joan Ferguson… didn’t you????


Why get bex at us Triple? Stephanie shouldn’t have been farce should she? No one told her to slap a ‘paying customer’ in the crowd???

THIS IS WHAT I CAME TO SEE! Stephanie & Brie  Storyl- hang on – JERICHO????

Oh no you know Jericho and Stephanie are arch nemesis! He got Houston singing this!!!! OH SNAP!!!


Then he pulled out old faithful! Asking Triple – Why the f**k didn’t he go to Stephanie’s aid straight away??!!! Simply put – she is a Trash bag, $5 dollar ho!!! (A pretty looking ho… that I’d wine & dine, take her to the movies… take her back to my crib… I will do all the rubbing…kiss her everywhere, Yes Triple – EVEN THERE!!!!)



Oh dear a shot to the head with the briefcase – BLAOW!!! Seth Rollins clapped Jericho down! We got a great match for later – Seth Rollins Vs Chris Jericho…BIG!!!!

6 Man tag team action! Miz & Rybaxel, Vs Dolph Ziggler and Usos…. bound to be a crazy hi-flying match… Can Ryback win another one???

HA! HA! Jailbird trending pon twitter!!!! Stephanie have criminal record!!!! Well if it’s good enough for Vincent Kennedy, it is good enough for Daddy’s Little Girl! JAY-BEE you are a funny muthaf***a! We should have our twitter and Facebook suspended for calling Stephanie a jail-bird??? So what should they do to users who have nasty pedophile sh!t on their Facebook or racist groups and all that sh!t???? Plant a bomb in their laptops and devices???? Actually that’s not a bad idea!!!!

Catch Xavier Woods, Kofi Kingston & Big E at ringside!!! now sporting suits that my Uncle Danny would be proud of!

God damnit Ziggler won… well he’s in a storyline right now so until Summerslam, I won’t cuss… I’ll have to bite my tongue…

Er… Xavier… your work is not done… look at R-Truth acting a fool in the ring! Come for your brother! That ‘WHAT’S UP!’ sh!t don’t fly no more!

WTF!!!!!! R-TRUTH BRUKK THE STREAK OF BO DALLAS???!!! HOLY CRAP!!! Bo Dallas BEX!!!! Assaulting R-Truth! What you gotta say now JAY-BEE???? Greatest streak of all time??? GETTHEF**KOUTTAHERE! Undertaker never assaulted Brock after his loss… he took it like a man! Undertaker is a man of honor!

Damn why can’t somebody rip Lana’s blouse off???!!! Hold on – did Lana just cuss bad word???? Nah must be her fake accent!


While Zeb Colter talks his nonsense…. I thought I’d play this for my dude Lee Steadx of the STC, because that’s what he’s thinking when he sees Lana, knowing that Rusev is supposedly dating her…


RUCKUS IN HOUSTON BETWEEN SWAGGER & RUSEV!!!! Why have I got this feeling that this will be a submission match of some sort? Or an I Quit match? Loser has to quit talking trash about one’s country???? Both got submission super moves….

Props to WWE – I am invested in every storyline leading up to Summerslam!!!! Very good fellas!

Well apart from the Sandow/Adam Rose rubbish…. trust me to speak too soon!

Roman Reigns Vs My Hero Kane… well we know how this gonna turn out… awaiting Randall’s entrance to bait it up for Reigns…. but wait – who will my hero Kane fight???

Well Randall came a lot sooner than I thought! Randall, Kane & Reigns fighting in the crowd!

KANE! Chokeslam to Reigns! Left Randall to finish him off! Randall! With voices in his head! They are chatting to him! They telling him to f**k Reigns up all over the ring! DDT off the barricade! Set up announce table! RKO – BLAOW! The table didn’t break! Randall nah dun – a second RKO – BLAOW!!!! The table broke this time! Well done Randall you f**ked up Reigns but guess what? You still don’t get a title shot muthaf***a!


Oh my GOD – Summer Rae & Layla acting as Spanish cheerleaders??? With those boots and tights on? Tight leather dress and sh!t??? What more will these two do to keep my d!ck harder than Bruce Willis??!

Fandango lose again to Los Matadores!!! HA! HA! HA! Just the way playas play… every day all day! HA! HA! HA!

Naomi still looks bex… and sexy with it, Alicia Fox and Cameron looking like they run the school yard… and Natalya looking like….Natalya! I LOVE IT!!!! THIS IS WHAT THAT WRESTLING SH!T IS ABOUT!

Wait a minute – Naomi has a new submission super move???? Why isn’t my girl champion???? Ok I understand the situation right now!

Seth Rollins Vs Chris Jericho – this one should be wild!

Knowing that the last segment is between two women…. we haven’t seen that since 2005 when Trish fought Lita! I’m telling you this is how hot the storyline is!

Great contest between Rollins & Jericho as expected, but that codebreaker from the top ropes – BLAOW!!! – SEND FOR THE WYATTS! I’m telling you Jericho needs another game plan! He gotta get some steel chairs in reserve! Otherwise he will be slaughter every time!

BUMBACLART SO THAT’S HOW IT GOES DOWN! When was the last time you were excited about a feud with two females??? Mickie James Vs Trish Stratus perhaps? I bet it was! Brie Bella will drop all the charges if Stephanie agrees to a fight at Summerslam!!!! So Steph puts on this act that she’s the victim only to – WHAAAAAAAAM! Blast Brie in her mouth corner! And all hell has broken loose! Capacity crowd with the Yes Chant! and This Is Awesome! Stephanie vows to make Brie Bella her B!TCH!!!! Stephanie, mother of three, a principal owner of World Wrestling Entertainment, corporate partner with many organisations! About to get it on with Brie Bella! Just think of the root of where all this began! All because Daniel Bryan would not Get In The Chair…. had he had done that… things would be different right now…. expect Danny himself to be at Summerslam supporting Brie along with Triple supporting his wife: TRUST ME… this match is gonna be DON!!! Nikki Bella gets a pay rise too! How about that then??!!!










BDSIR Networkwww.cageamateursuk.com

Monday Night Raw #1103: July 14, 2014!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw

Smack Talk Centre Raw Logo

The Infamous Informer

Ok so Germany won the muthaf***!n World Cup…. THAT AIN’T SH!T compared to my triumph!!!! I met the Supreme Clientele Champion himself – Ghostface Killah! My idol of 20 years!!!

GRANTFACE KILLAHNow that I’ve been in the presence of greatness, YOU are reading greatness. I appreciate that. I got my ginger nuts, my dairy milk bubbly mint chocolate, my Sprite, I’ve had a nap after the epic London trip… LET’S DO THIS!!! RAW #1103, HOLD’DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZWord on the street is that the icon himself Sting will appear on Raw to promote his addition on WWE2K15!!!! I have warned a certain STC member in the name of Stephen Cooper: If Sting DOES NOT APPEAR IN THE RAW ARENA…. the dreaded chair awaits!!!! Believe me – he don’t wanna go there!!!

So w’happen, they got Cena to advertise the WWE Network now? I think I’m used to Michael Cole advertising that sh!t!!! F**k that – The Infamous Informer and Shadfather advertise that sh!t better – It’s $9.99 a month which is £6.71 – which is around the national minimum wage so THE GRANT SAYS – if you working and you’re a wrestling fan… you better cop that sh!t before I clap you in your head!

You mean to tell me that while Dean Ambrose was getting buss arse by My hero Kane, Seth Rollins and Randall, John Cena and Roman Reigns were in the ring just watching that sh!t? I thought Ambrose was your ‘brother’ Roman??? Oh I get it… one of them was Kane…. but you’re both big strapping guys huh???? You both claim to be ‘Superman’ in your own right??? As Vincent Kennedy would say, ‘John Cena & Roman Reigns are nothing more than two, putrid… p-(censored)!!!!!’


Oh HELL 2 DA NAW!!! It’s that how it goes down? Everytime Miz fights his grill is gonna be on the titantron??? While I remind myself it’s not the attitude era no more, now would be a good time to ask Austin & Big Show to destroy the titantron!!!

I’d rather see Vladimir Putin’s dry @$$ grill up on that muthaf***a!

Word is that Wade Barrett will be at Battleground to present the Intercontinental Championship to the winner…. while Shadfather backs the Great Khali, I back The Miz!!! I hope Wade Barrett says “Congratulations you won the Intercontinental Championship, but I’m afraid I got some BAD NEWS!” And clap down the winner with the belt! It would be great!!!!

Damn the way Stephanie is all over Triple… I’m not interested in this next Dolph Ziggler contest…. Triple just GET IN THAT PU$$Y! Or do I have to go GRANTINGTON STEELE on your wife while you watch and you jerk your hammer?


HA! HA! Fandango as a solo dancer…. that’s right – because he’s a B!TCH!!!!! Since I hate both Ziggler and Fandango, lets watch this right here, when Summer Rae and my Baby Moda Layla saw sense and beat down the pansy!

YES! YES! YES! Now on Raw, Summer Rae & Layla just dissed Fandango! Now they dancing around Ziggler! THIS IS IT! They could cure Ziggler of his homosexual tendencies!!!!! I’m sorry, if I was Ziggler, I don’t care if it’s in front of 15,000 fans, I would be protruding in those wrestling trunks!!!!!


NO! Sandow dressed as some idiot in a McDonald’s???? EPIC FAIL! WWE YOU DROPPED THE BALL HERE! He could have dressed up as Sting to annoy the fans on some bullsh!t!


There could still be hope for STC’s Stephen Cooper yet!!!!

OH SNAP – 2 out of 3 falls tag team contest between The Wyatt man dem and the Uso Brudda at Battleground? Did you see the Wyatt tag team super move? I don’t know what to call it – f**k it – I call it the Buzzard Death Drop – BLAOW!!!! I’m sorry Usos – you cannot compete with that move!

Lana what you doing hiding behind that podium thing? Let me see your sexy @$$ legs in that tight up skirt!!! Anyway I’m backing your argument girl in this American/Russian détente thing going on here!Official_WWE_Battleground_poster_featuring_Bray_Wyatt

GOD DAMN – Lana makes that Russian accent sound sexy – imagine f**k!n her and she has to scream and holla in that language???!!! GOOD GAWD ALMIGHTY!

See that’s why Rusev gonna beat Swagger at Battleground – even the crowd boo their own president…. RACIAL MAN RACIAL!!!!!

But I gotta say – I can’t wait for this match!!!! Backing Rusev all the way! RUSEV! CRUSH! USE THE ACCOLADE AND KILL!!!!

OH MY GOD! WWE NETWORK DOING A PHILIP BROOKS SPECIAL! All the Philip Brooks fans are gonna rush to the chemists and get that essential cream to put on their genitalia!!! Chemists across the world are gonna make a huge turnover!!! Socks will be hard to find in Primark! Normal folk (that’s me and you) invest in an umbrella! There’s gonna be CM Spunk everywhere!!!!


…and the suffering of Nikki Bella continues! Listen to Stephanie wuk brain on Nikki, saying that Brie was selfish for leaving her hanging like that! Well Steph has a point, I mean, The Bella Twins are a package after all, fans like to see the twins… but let’s be real, ever since they got involved with Danny Bryan & John Cena the appeal has gone… I don’t know about you… I don’t fancy the twins anymore… like Beyoncé and Kim Kardashian, when they got involved with Jay-Z and Kanye, the sex appeal was lost. Don’t get mad, I’m only being real!

You know – the team of Cameron and Alicia Fox could work here… do you think Naomi will come out to help out??? You never know!

Say what? Cameron Vs Naomi at Battleground???? WHOA! This PPV is gonna be great!!!

Even though I knew about this…. I JUST MARKED THE F**K OUT WATCHING THE TRAILER!!! TWO GENERATIONS OF STING ON WWE2K15!!! THE GRANT SAYS – I’m pre-ordering that sh!t!!!!! If WWE do the entrance like what they just did there…. HOLY F**K!!!!

Hmmm interesting…What’s wrong Randall? Afraid that my hero Kane won’t stick to the plan and make you the champion??? If that’s the plan we don’t need a plan B???? Triple looked at Randall as if to say – there is ALWAYS A PLAN B…

Talking of Plan B…. what’s this I hear? Paul Heyman quit? Or he was fired? All apart of the plan people! I was looking forward to him telling me that his client – Plan B himself – conquered the Undertaker’s Streak at WrestleMania!

YES!!! With the combined force of Big E & Kofi, Big E defeated Cesaro! Suddenly Heyman disappears and Cesaro loses????!!!!! Ok now guys, call up Mark Henry and Titus…..

Are people chanting ‘BORING’ to Bray Wyatt’s promo? do me a favour wrestling fools – purchase the muthaf***!n network for $9.99 a month – you have to purchase the cream separately – watch your f**k!n Philip Brooks documentary and F**K OFF!


LAWD HAVE MERCY – EVA MARIE DEP PON DE TELLY! Let’s see what she has learned….

Whoa Eva has improved a little bit! She has learned a few holds and submissions! And a back-breaker too! WOW! Only that her moves don’t look like they hurt…

I’d still f**k the sh!t out of her though! Grantington Steele that pu$$y – BANG BANG BANG!!!

Big ups to WWE – they got the Sting merchandise up for sale and everything! Come on guys! Get to contributing towards Sting’s retirement fund!


All I have to do is BO-LIEVE!!! Bo-Lieve that while he’s fighting The Great Khali, I’m getting some ice cream!!!

Hey I just had a thought…. Do you think Bo Dallas could win the Battle Royal?????

He just defeated The Great Khali via count-out! Maybe he may lose the Streak to don of dons himself???? Just a thought…

Oh no! Paul Heyman is here!!!! Here we go! He’s talking about Plan C! And he didn’t mention the Undertaker’s streak!!! Uh Oh guys and gals! stay close to your loved ones!!! Tell them that you love them!

Why does this muthaf***a Flo-rida keep passing through Raw? He must be broke because nobody buying his wack records or downloading his sh!t from iTunes! And RePPiN4U sure as hell doesn’t endorse his sh!t!


Wow Ric Flair looks good! Look at him looking at Renée like he wants to go buckwild and profile up in her @$$!

Oh no!! Ric Flair predicts John Cena gonna hold down the title at Battleground! Roman Reigns don’t like that sh!t! I tell you this: If Renée asked me that same question – who I think gonna win… I would say…. ME!!! Let’s me and you go in the back, play some Ghostface Killah, and make the Wizard of Poetry do the talking!


Uh-oh!!! at time of writing this, there is about 20 minutes left until I begin construction of the chair custom-built for Stephen Cooper!

It could be excellent strategy here, that Kane, Randall and Seth Rollins took out Ambrose earlier… let’s do the knowledge here, Ambrose says that anytime Seth tries to cash the cheque, he would come and f**k it up. So by doing that, they take on Roman and Cena, they brukk them up enough and then Seth can cash his cheque right there without worrying about Ambrose!

Nice to see Seth Rollins using the three amigo suplex right there! Ok who’s gonna use the triple German suplex?!!! Yes wrestling fools, WWE may erase Chris Benoit out of their history minus the network but his moves live on live long through various superstars!

Well Well Well! All guys in that match minus Seth Rollins be dropping their super moves on each other setting up the Fatal 4 Way jump off…. AND THE SHOW HAS ENDED!!!! You know what that means! Out comes the tool box! all the nails, all the wood, all the sharp edges… Let’s begin CONSTRUCTION!!! OHHHH STEPHEN???!!!!!!


(back story – he was on STC FB page today ranting and raving about Sting’s appearance on WWE Raw this week, he knew it was to promote the game, but he really thought he was gonna appear, and tried to convince us… I warned him only ONCE, that if Sting DOES NOT APPEAR… he would be given the GET IN THE CHAIR!!! AWARD…. his brother Ian Cooper is gonna love this, especially when WWE Network are doing a special on his idol???!!!!)










BDSIR Network


Monday Night Raw #1101: June 30, 2014!!!

Smack Talk Centre Raw Logo

The Infamous Informer


Yes John Cena! 15 times World Wrestling Federation Undisputed Champion!!!! It’s the way he won the titles as well, he hardly did anything in the match, he lay down for like 25 minutes in the match… then he dropped his super move on Kane & Randall, climbed the ladder, and the way he smiled at the camera when he took the titles… let’s be real – THAT WAS F**KED UP!!!

Shout out to WWE for ruining the Summerslam main event – John Cena Vs Brock Lesnar for the title…why the rarse did you release the poster before Munny Inna Bank start? But wait guys!!! CARD SUBJECT TO CHANGE. But don’t bank on it like the PPV!!!!


Enough of that sh!t, we must move on. I got my pringles, my galaxy chocolate cookie crumble, my supermalt, I got strawberry ice cream for later, jaffa cakes… I’m ready for this sh!t, are you??? RAW #1101! HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZWord on the street is there is a returning ‘WWE champion’ in the hiz-house! Uh-oh… I can see the Philippa Brooks fans getting the Vaseline out…. oh jesus…

Uh-oh Triple Teef & Stephanie have a smile on their face… why the f**k is the crowd chanting Phillipa’s name? Yeah stop living in the past like Stephanie said!

Here comes the new World Wrestling Federation Champion! Ok you attitards don’t all rush to the toilet at once! Rub it in their face Cena! 15 times rude boy!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Cena is hoping to give Danny another opportunity to fight for the title! OH NO! Cena is on the cover of WWE2K15!!! It just gets better!!!! Stephanie dropping two foot to Cena’s music! I’m telling you! Stephanie is a hip hop head!!!


But you’re not a hip hop head Triple Teef!!! Don’t talk that hip hop sh!t!!!! HA! HA! HA! Don’t give me joke!

Triple just gave Cena that same choice that Vincent Kennedy asked Austin! You want the easy way or the hard way!

Well the hard way it is! Fatal Four Way jump off at Battleground! Cena Vs Roman Reigns Vs Randall Orton Vs my hero Kane!!! And if Cena becomes superman that night as usual, Triple will draw for his Plan B: Seth Rollins!!!

So after what happened at Munny Inna Bank, maybe Dean Ambrose will go after Kane either somewhere down the road or at Summerslams! Don’t mind me I’m just doing the science…

Word up, I’m gonna tweet Stephanie and ask her what tunes she’s into… don’t believe me? WATCH!

Seth Rollins – I am finding it hard to hate you…. you are still the don! We are treated to another contest with him and RVD!

Who tried to tell me that Seth Rollins Curb Stomp super move was weak? That’s right it was Ian Cooper! GET IN THE CHAIR!!!!!

WROOOOOOOOOY!!!! Everytime Seth Rollins is about to cash his cheque, Dean Ambrose will appear and f**k him up!!! So what if it’s Cody Rhodes Vs Damian Sandow over again from last year….but with more INTENSITY and more MILITANT!!

UH-OH!!! here comes Rusev!!!! Fly that flag in celebration! Rusev – don’t you have thought of f**k!n Lana??? You must do surely!

Who will be America’s next failure??? OH NO! It’s that bastard Swagger and Zeb SAM_3287Colter! They represent everything about America and go against muthaf**az crossing the borders!

Is it me or is Lana laughing at Zeb Colter’s promo?

I guess Colter has thrown away his deportation list! He sees the big picture! Don’t think for one single SOLITARY SECOND that I will support Colter & Swagger just because they just turned face. They still disrespect MY PEOPLE! We The People? The Grant Says ‘WE, THE TIMBERLAND BOOT UP YOUR B!TCH @$$!!!’

The Usos entrance gotta be one of my favourites right now! Everything they say comes from the heart and then the pyro – BLAOW!!! Not only will they be in WWE 2K15, but hopefully The Wyatt Family’s entrance with the audience with their cell phones on! Big up to Jerry Lawler telling JAY-BEE to put his phone down!

Haha! You jabronies may not like JAY-BEE & Mike Cole not calling the match but instead talking about the dirty clothes of Luke Harper…BUT I DO… so F**K YOU!


I’ve come to the conclusion that this ‘Whole World In His Hands’ thing depends on the crowd. See in certain cities they will sing that sh!t!!!! Other cities they are as dead as Fandango when I get my hands on him for kissing up my Layla!

Damn Nikki, they treating you bad because Brie sacrificed herself??? You gotta fight my girls by yourself? Oh well Nikki… good luck!!!

Since you jabronies have started sh!tt!ng on the WWE2K15 cover… maybe I should join in and see what it’s like to be a IWC b!atch… maybe Bo Dallas should be on the cover!!! I mean, he inspires millions the world over! All you gotta do is BO-LIEVE DAMNIT!

I’ll tell you this – Total Divas Season 3 gonna be MAAAAD if Stephanie and Brie’s storyline gets involved in the script!

Why have I got this feeling that Nikki WILL WIN this handicap match because Miss Girl Bye-Bye is acting a fool??? Oh forget it… They won but Miss Girl Bye-Bye is still acting a fool. What happened to U.N.I.T.Y. ladies?

Well ain’t that a b!tch… I’M AFRAID I GOT SOME BAD NEWS… Wade Barrett out the game with a shoulder injury… the Intercontinental championship is vacant. Shadfather says The I.C. Title is cursed, Mia Bonita says SmackDown is cursed, THE GRANT SAYS WADE BARRETT WAS CURSED EVER SINCE HE BURIED THE UNDERTAKER ALIVE IN 2010!!! You see? If Undertaker doesn’t get you in the physical, he’ll get you in the mental and spiritual. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!

Battle Royal jump off at Battleground for the Intercontinental Title… Well The Grant Says I have a feeling who is gonna win that… I’m gonna hold my tongue for now.

You what? Kofi Kingston defeated Cesaro during the commercial break? Now we back on and Cesaro beating down de black man? RACIAL MAN RACIAL!!!!!

This is f**ked up – is it because Cesaro knows Switzerland are gonna get knocked out the World Cup? Nah man – I like my Cesaro but Kofi has to go postal and beat down Cesaro like he did Randall!

YES! VINCENT KENNEDY!!!! Er wait a minute… that’s not VINCENT KENNEDY!!! That’s SANDOW KENNEDY! Oh hell naw!!! Hang on his impression might be good…

Oh dear Stephanie is not too happy!!!! She gonna send someone after Sandow for impersonating Vincent Kennedy…. NOT THE NOT SO GREAT KHALI!!! And he won as well! OH MY GOD NO! One chop to Sandow’s head top – BLAOW! Shadfather turn your head! I think he did quite well! What’s up Steph? Time of the month? You need some Infamous cocky with those vitamins girl???!!!


The former WWE Champion is here! The Miz!!! Thank you Felix Pizarro for spoiling it for us! GET IN THE CHAIR!!!

He was filming The Marine 4? Wait a minute – wasn’t Summer Rae in that film too? And I’m sure he’s taking shots at The Rock here talking about Hollywood and turning his back… sounds like The Miz is embodying that role again! He’s out to main event WrestleMania…. boring….boring…bor-

BREAK THE WALLS DOWN!!!! BUMBACLART!!!! JERICHO???!!!!! LAWD HAVE MERCY!!!! Not one, but TWO former WWE Champions! How I laugh at one of the guys on Perfect Plex Radio who said Jericho was out with Fozzy… you can NEVER believe anything Jericho says!

Yeah talk sh!t now Miz – PPPPPPPPPP!!!!!! Jericho just punched the Miz through school buses!

HOLD UP!!!! The Wyatt Man dem!!!! They just brukk up Jericho!!! This is gonna be an EPIC storyline! Suddenly I am looking forward to Battleground! Money In The What???? In one fell swoop, RAW is BETTER than the PPV!

Now time for my baby girl Layla doing her ting! Forget about Fandumbgay – I’ll F**K HIM UP! WWE book it – Fandumb!tch@$$ Vs the Infamous Informer at Summerslam!

Now the ponce is fighting another ponce in Dolph Ziggler… say what? Summer Rae offered a truce to Layla??? I don’t like the smell of Summer Rae’s pum-pum…black man loves his fried fish but not if it’s rancid as Summer Rae!


WTF is this??? Now Summer Rae is sticking her tongue down Ziggler’s throat???? URRRRGHHH DIRTY RATCHET!

See I said that this Stardust and Goldust was just a phase leading to the Summerslam Rhodes clash… but I dunno… because they are over with the crowd! I saw this match with them and Rybaxel on Munny Inna Bank, so I ain’t watching it again f**k that!

One thing worth noting – why are the crowd chanting FEED ME MORE at Ryback now???

Why do Goldust and Stardust look like they are in love with each other? I suppose you’re all off the hook Razor Ramon, Piper and especially Ahmed Johnson!

Are there still haters on Paige saying she should go back to NXT? BACKFOOT!!! AJ LEE IS BACK TOO??? MONEY IN THE WHAT???!!!

You mean to tell me that AJ Lee returns and all you b!tches can chant is CM Punk??? You wait til I go on radio… that’s all I’m saying!!!

Backside – we gonna get a rematch! AJ LEE! PAIGE! DIVAS CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH! HERE WE GO!!!


Can you believe that after all we just seen, we have come to the main event! And that Triple TEEF is at ringside! There might be a sledgehammer nearby watch out!

Look at Roman Reigns embracing the audience and that Triple TEEF looking at him!!! It’s almost like Triple Vs The Rock all over again!

UH-OH!!! my hero Kane is out to destroy Cena! So that Seth can cash his cheque! Tombstone Cena into the concrete – BLAOW! But don’t forget – Ambrose WILL f**k up Seth! REMEMBER ME TELL YUH!

LOOK W’HAPPEN NOW! Ambrose came to brukk him up! But then Reigns with the spear to Kane again – BLAOW! Then the stare down between Reigns and the evil, EVIL, TRIPLE TEEF!!!! THIS IS AWESOME? THIS IS MUTHAF***K!N DAN! Like I could live through Roman Reigns warrioristically, I don’t give a damn if that word don’t exist! The road to Summerslam has begun people!











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BDSIR Network


Monday Night Raw #1099: June 16, 2014!!!

Smack Talk Centre Ray Logo

The Infamous Informer

You know what I don’t understand about all this future endeavor sh!t? Why the f**k are fans concerned about 3MB? THEY WERE WACK – GET OVER IT! I admit – I was kinda heartbroken when JTG and Teddy Long were let go… JTG was getting paid for sittin on his @$$! Let’s be real, if you were getting paid thousands for sittin on yo’ @$$, YOU WOULD LOVE IT! SO SHUDDUP!


Stay tuned Smack Talk Centre… The Infamous Informer (that’s me, IWC’s favourite nemesis) and  Shadfather (Negrodamus, take heed in his words) host the STC Future Endeavor list! We have compiled a Top 10 superstars that the STC would give a P45/Pink slip to, along with that one diva (WWE fired Aksana), so who does the STC choose?

It all happens this Saturday night 1am UK 8pm EST on BDSIR NETWORK…


Enough of all that, time for RAW! #1099!! HOL’ DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZOk why the f**k are everybody out here? What is this ‘critical announcement?’ How many shows have started with Triple TEEF and Stephanie these days? I mean I don’t mind Stephanie…. especially if she started the show with her lovely legs and backside to the camera!

Oh SNAP – look at Stephanie’s top! With the one strap on her arm!!!! She needs some ‘young’ meat… Triple TEEF ain’t that right mayyynnnn!

Wait a minute – everybody in a battle royal? Does that include the divas??? Oh dear – The Shield and Cena are not allowed? TRIPLE TEEF!!!!!!!

HA! Because I’m tight-fisted and tried to watch RAW on a stream while entertaining you guys – the stream breaks down on me. I manage to sort it and I hear something about John Cena fighting my hero Kane in a stretcher match???? Cena you’re my dude but Kane is my hero! KILL CENA!!! KILLLLLLLL HIM!!!!

Good luck to the athletes at the Special Olympics in New Jersey!!! And the Infamous Informer continues to support his team in the World Cup! Nah not England – they still rely on one man to carry them….enough of that sh!t – Seth Rollins Vs Dolph Ziggler! GET HIM SETH! And oh yeah – CHANGE YOUR MUSIC – it ain’t saying nuthin!

I do like that Rollins maintains his swat gear as his attire… VERY GOOD!

Big ups to STC’s Anthony Cardenas who says a ladder match between Ziggler and Rollins would be crazy and I agree!

Was that a Lionsault attempt by Seth Rollins???? WHOA! (Don’t go saying he’s the next Jericho…) I’d slap you upside the head like my name is Batman and you Robin!

I said that Dean Ambrose wants to f**k you up Rollins! I gotta big up Triple TEEF for this one… comes up on titantron and tells Ambrose – ‘I’M AFRAID I GOT SOME BAD NEWS!!!’ In his best English accent! Out comes Wade Barrett – WROOOOOOY! Another great fight (I can’t say wrestling match) about to pop off!

So let me get this right so I can understand this: Ambrose is now fighting in his vest and jeans while Rollins would still fight in his swat gear? Interesting. I’m glad they not fighting in standard wrestling attire….


So @KevinHart4real is coming to host #Raw #WWECleveland…. I told him to watch out for @RusevBUL"</p


THE GRANT SAYS: Something tells me Kevin Hart will stand up to the racist Rusev!!! And may try to chat up Lana too!

OH SNAP!!! Is Roman Reigns spiking Triple and Steph McTeef’s drinks???? Oh my god NO!!! By the way Reigns – Vickie Guerrero is NOT beautiful!!!!

All I know is, it’s personal between Ambrose and Rollins now! Ambrose never cared about his match with Barrett – he just wanted to fight! Rollins comes out to teef, and fight brukk out in the crowd! Yo Triple – don’t give these two a standard match at Money Inna Bank…. this is a straight up street fight!

HOLY F**K – my internet is down…. Now is a good time to get my ice cream! Shall I play some PS3 while I’m waiting? I know it’s not the bill… ain’t that a b!tch…

Ok we back! I was gonna play Tekken Tag Tournament 2, and next thing I know Sheamus & Bray Wyatt are trying to destroy each other….

Yo check it – Bray is in the Munny Inna Bank match for the WWE title, The Usos defend their titles against Rowan & Harper, can you imagine if The Wyatt Family cleans up? It would be even better than what The Shield did!!!

HEY – TEEEF! Sheamus was gonna finish Wyatt with his Brogue Kick and Wyatt’s BDSIR LAYLA GRANTbredrin tried to hold him back, and BIG FIGHT BRUKK OUT between Sheamus and the Usos against the Wyatt man dem!!! Ladders involved! The Usos – running up the ladder and flying into the Wyatt man dem! Sheamus with the ladder – throws it over the ring and onto their head – BLAOW!!!! RAW IS DANGEROUS RUDE BOY!

Oh seen!!! The stretcher match between Cena & Kane is to qualify for the Munny Inna Bank!

What’s wrong Stephanie? You got the runs girl???? The coffee too sweet??? MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Don’t forget to wipe your @$$!


WHOA!!! Paul Heyman says that Cesaro is gonna become the World Wrestling Federation champion at Munny Inna Bank???? Not a prediction, but a spoiler????!!!!! DROP THE BOMB ON EM!

OHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! It’s that f**kable Lana!!!! Why doesn’t the crowd chant ‘suck my d!ck’????!! even the ladies?!!!!


Oh no! Lana changed up Mount Rushmore!!!! 4 Russian ambassadors? She Can’t Do That!!!

Ok Heath Slater, you lost your buddies, you still gonna get brukk up by Rusev!!! CRUSH!!!

OH MY DAYS!! It wasn’t the runs….. Roman Reigns put some sh!t in the coffee that made Steph throw up crazy all over the WWE and all over Vickie Guerrero!!! NOW THAT IS JUSTICE!!!!!

Wait! It gets better!!! Triple did say that Vickie is in charge while he takes Stephanie home… which left Roman to manipulate Vickie into letting him into the battle royal! Winner goes into Munny Inna Bank!!! OH MY GOD NO! Roman is gonna win! What’s Triple gonna do now???? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! I LOVE IT!!!

So w’happen? Kevin Hart is gonna be on commentary??? UH-OH!!!! He could say anything on that mic!!!!

F**K me – Layla…. those thighs…. OH SNAP – she poured milk all over Summer Rae and rubbed her face in kitty litter last week on Main Event? YES BABY!!!! Now Summer looks like a porn star after 200 men cum all over her stank @$$!


Kevin Hart looks confused with the attire of Fandango and Adam Rose! Well he is Thinking Like A Man!

NO! Kevin Hart has become a rosebud!!! Yo Adam Rose – you may jump into your crowd but you can’t do it like Method Man!!!

Method Man dive

Roman Reigns keeps the Shield music…. interesting! I thought the battle royal was the main event? Never mind!

Interesting – Rusev in the match…. who is gonna eliminate him??? I’m gonna Keep Watch like the Wu-Tang…

No point booing over the fact that Ziggler was eliminated… I gave up on him since the book of Genesis!

BACKFOOT! Roman Reigns and Rusev the last two!!!!!

Superman punch to the headtop of Rusev – BLAOW!!!! Roman Reigns is in the Munny Inna Bank ladder match!!! Triple TEEF don’t check your twitter! Attend to your wife!!!

Happy Birthday warrior


Forget about Cena’s promo…. that Renée Young….

There’s something bout this girl man, from around my way
Ever try to hold back your feelings, but it just wouldn’t stay
But when I finally found the words to say
I wanted to run away, simply run away
You can try to run and hide, it won’t make a difference
You can lie to yourself, or try to reason
Sure it hurts when it comes to your attention
That you’re in love with the girl…

I must do a Lana tribute video… then following that, a Renée Young video… but make no mistake about it… The Infamous Informer is in love….with LAYLA.


Big ups to Cameron and Naomi…they outlasted Broadus Clay! I said that the Funkadactyls would break out and become the true stars! They even running with Broadus music!

Interesting…Naomi not feeling Cameron’s attitude and fighting style…. it will be a sad day if these two break up….

Ok so Cody Rhodes has found this ‘partner’ for Goldust? He’s the don? Who is he? Booker-T? Razor Ramon? Rowdy Roddy Piper? How about Ahmed Johnson??????


WTF!!! Stardust is the new tag team partner for Goldust???? We know it’s you Cody Rhodes but hey! Let’s not be Smarks and enjoy this sh!t!!!

Bumbaclart! They win!!! And Stardust got a new move set on top!!! I like this!!!

Damn I gotta do some wrestling research… 10 years ago there was a stretcher match on Raw, and it involved my hero Kane but I can’t remember who the opponent was… alternatively you guys could tell me by answering on a postcard or tweeting me @MZATheInfamous!

I took a quick trip to google… I know who it was… On this day, I see clearly….

Question – when WWE2K15 drops later this year, will the game developers chant ‘CM Punk’ on random matches? Could CM Punk be a secret character???? ANSWERS ON A POSTCARD PLEASE!!!!

Oh HELL 2 DA NAW!!! Cena hit the FU to my hero Kane through the announce table – BLAOW!!!! DAMNIT!!! Come on Kane… Get up Kane…GET HIM KANE!!!

What???? SETH ROLLINS & RANDALL – TEEF!!!! They gonna brukk up Cena!!! Ambrose runs through to continue the beef with Rollins! But Kane – Chokeslam to Ambrose – BLAOW!!!! Cena recovers, carries the steel steps, throws it at Kane – BLAOW!!! YO! THIS SH!T IS CRAZY!!!










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