Tag Archives: Dana Brooke

Monday Night Raw #1277, November 20, 2017!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

Deep breath… TRIPLE TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!! TRIPLE TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF! I knew that muthaf***a could not be trusted! I don’t think anybody saw THAT sort of ending coming though… and I don’t mean when Braun Strowman had him sh!tt!n his brief!

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1277! Forget about NXT War Games. Forget about Survivor Series. The main story is – JoJo nudes have been leaked! Like – GOD DAYUUUUUUM! If you are good I may share them with you!

Steph Raw

Since Virgin Media wanted to f**k with me (internet was down) I have to play catch up on YouTube.

We at least Kurt still has his job… I still wanna know why Triple pedigreed him for no reason though!

Oh no Jason Jordan bex! I hope he knows what he’s doing!

He wants a match with Triple Teef? Does he realise this dude uses the hammer???

That’s what the fans want, but Triple doesn’t wrestle on a random Monday?

Triple H back off jacket! He’s THE GAME – he’s played this game for too long Jason Jordan is but a noob!

“Triple H isn’t afraid of anyone in that locker room…” – BRAUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!!!! You sure about that Stephanie?

Triple trying to stand up to him! Then he forgot he doesn’t have the McMahon Helmsley Regime so he backed off!

GRANT BODY-P!

Kurt might still be the GM but The Authority is in full force I tell ya! Putting Braun up against Jason Jordan? TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!

Now, Finn Balor passes out to Joe’s super move right, and I couldn’t help but glance at Dave Meltzer talking about ‘Vince has no faith in Balor’… see muthaf***az – this is the sh!t I’m talking about – DON’T BE LIKE DAVE. Conversely, if Samoa Joe lost to Balor – there is Dave over there saying Vince has no faith in Joe… don’t follow him readers…

To those pea brains who say Dean Ambrose is ‘boring’ with that off the rope lunatic clothesline thing he does, I bet you didn’t see the lunatic roll up pin attempt on Sheamus did you??

If I had a negative to say about the Survivor Series, it’s that a Cruiserweight Survivor Series match would have been dope… The Zo Train Vs the rebels… Oh well… you could say it was WWE dropping the ball, but we don’t think about things like – time constraints…

I think Dana Brooke is trying to avenge her friend Emma’s release isn’t she? She wasn’t ready for Asuka in NXT, she ain’t ready now!

Remember last time Dana Brooke slapped Asuka? Didn’t work out too well! What makes her think it will work out this time?

OH NO! The ugly @$$ Paige is back! Bow wow wow yippie yo yippie yay… MISS ME WITH THAT BULLSH!T!

HELL NO I didn’t miss you. F**KOUTTAHERE!

Hold up! Mandy Rose & Sonya Deville?! Now you haven’t gotta question what happened to the Tough Enough female champion, but that Sonya Deville…I like em feisty! OH YEAH!

HAHAHAHAHA!!! Now that’s funny! they beat down Bayley, Sasha and Mickie and then Alicia Fox screamed and run garne!!!! FANTASTIC!

Mandy Rose has a better super move than Eva Marie ever had!GRANT WWDJC2

Shout out to Micah Lee of Soul N Sports/BDSIR NETWORK – he posed the question – if RAW gets Mandy Rose & Sonya Deville – what does Smackdown get? WELL THE GRANT SAYS – BILLIE KAY & PEYTON ROYCE FOR THE WIN! DO IT!!!!

WELL THE GRANT SAYS THIS – If Mandy & Sonya have any sense – they will leave Paige before she turns on them – just like she did with Becky Lynch and Charlotte… Submission Sorority 2.0. What do you think folks?

YES!!!! THEY BEAT DOWN ALEXA BLISS! At this moment, I like Paige just that little eeeny beeeny bit more right now! Respect points gone up from NAUGHT – NAUGHT point ONE!

GRANT BODY-P!

First Alicia Fox, now The Miz! HIM RUN GARNE!!! I wished Braun was at the other side of the stage to stop The Miz in his tracks… I would have been DUN!

TRIPLE POWERBOMB TO THE MIZTOURAGE – BLAOW!

Jason Jordan might be the luckiest muthaf***a alive – his knee gave in at the right time as if it was divine intervention – because my hero Kane appeared and attacked Braun Strowman!

Kane is killing Strowman with the chair! WHOA! He did The Undertaker move with the chair to the throat! HOLY SMOKES! All that is left to do is electrocute his seed bag and set him on fire! (What – no pyro? Ohhhh….)

GRANT BODY-P!

In the battle to become the Intercontinental Champion… Sheamus & Cesaro try to teef!! Miz hits the Skull Crushing Finale to Double R – BLAOW! 1, 2, and…NOT SO EASY!!!

The Shield come down to sort the injustice!

Spear to The Miz – BLAOW!!! 1, 2, and…3!!!! LET THE COMPLAINING ON THE INTERNET BEGIN!

Let’s be real – if all the beatdowns The Miz has had in recent weeks by the likes of Strowman and The Shield was somebody else, y’all muthaf***az be like – he’s getting buried! It’s a damn shame that half the wrestling fans have lack of intellect…

…and The Miz is still talking sh!t…. until The Shield appeared behind him! Now he wants to shake their hand? What a sportsman…

WHOA!!! The Miz said this is his yard??? Er… Roman…. do you have to make a long distance call to Death Valley?

Seth Rollins kick him down as if to say – SHUT UP YOUR BLODCLART BWOY!

Announce table set up – The Miz – Shield bombed through the table – BLAOW!!! When will he ever learn???

Monday Night Raw #1222, October 24, 2016!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

On this day, you wrestling fans can get your revenge! Why? I turned on my Facebook this morning, word up – seems like everybody on this Walking Dead thing. LOOK – I ain’t tryna watch no muthaf**!n zombies – OK! But damn this sh!t is real to you right? Yo wrestling fans – GET EM…

walking-dead-wack

Y’all know that muthaf**a who ‘dies’ said ‘cheque please’ and is not spending a dime on your crying @$$£$!

GRANT BODY-P!

In other news… on this day… something is supposed to happen which changes wrestlers lives… er… enlighten me????

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RAW 1222! BROCCCCCCCCK!!!! WHAT YOU GONNA DO KID?

WWF PROPA TINGZ

Standing ovation for he who has the dreaded list! Now you can buy the T-shirt! YES!!! Fantastic!

He has terrible news? What? The triple threat match scheduled for the main event has been cancelled? Whoever cancelled it must go on the list!

Hold up – the list is stolen???? What sort of atrocity? Quick – call Dexter! Put the criminal on the table! This is not right!

Crowd chanting – ‘Where’s the list?’ Kevin Owens doesn’t care about the list! DISRESPECT!

Maybe Stephanie got the list?! Nobody must leave the arena until the list is found!

SERIOUSLY STEPHANIE! You need to come over here and let me lay you down and… ok I’ll stop!

SETH ROLLINS GOT THE LIST! DEXTER SORT HIM OUT!

UH-OH! Stephanie is on the list???? That’s not right!

KEVIN OWENS IS ON THE LIST TOO? GOOD LORD!

Oh god – I hope Seth doesn’t do anything drastic to that list! It’s Jericho’s livelihood! It’s more precious than the World Wrestling Federation Championship!

For real Balding Club? You gonna just shut down Enzo & Cass up like that?

Obviously shutting down the mic is no problem! They did their promo anyway and got over with the crowd!

Enzo Amore defeated Anderson! Balding Club lose again! Internet Wrestling Community HOW YOU DOIN?

GRANT BODY-P!

Yep – Rusev isn’t afraid of Hell In a Cell… course you aren’t… Sasha and Charlotte are going in there! And just like I said to those two sexy @$$£$, I’m gonna say the same to you Rusev – Undertaker is NOT your opponent!

To those who think The New Day have gone stale… you might as well go to the tattoo parlour and get ‘Trump’ tattooed on your forehead like the STUPID IDIOT you are!

dyam-arse-trump

This Cesaro and Sheamus sh!t is a repeat of Miz and Mizdow in a sense where you cheer one but boo the other relentlessly. You would think that they will become tag team champions, but given New Day’s 428 title reign (6 days away from the ‘sacred’ 434) I can’t see it happening.

Nice touches by WWE2K17 to make Cesaro’s Giant Swing and New Day’s Unicorn stampede OMG moves! Gives me an incentive to play as them, as if there were any doubt!

Kofi Kingston has learned a valuable lesson… never fly at Cesaro… you will run into an uppercut – BLAOW! His chin probably looks like James Ellsworth right about now!

GRANT BODY-P!

Jinder Mahal is actually killing me! ‘One must find the list, but first, he must find inner peace!’ Breathe in Breathe out! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! SUPERB!

Last time Bayley and Dana fought, there was some funny business that happened… they shall fight again! Bayley got that same sellotape on her shoulder that Cesaro got! Is there something going on there??? Answers on a postcard please – tweet me @MZATheInfamous!

Hold on – an arm wrestling match???? Yo creative – 2003 is THAT WAY! The crowd want wrestling – Not arm wrestling!

Dana Brooke TEEEEEEEF! Bayley was on the verge of beating Dana in a dry @$$ arm wrestling contest but Dana had to drop a cheap shot! Like I say – if they did this 15 years ago the crowd would be invested!

Jericho said he would never put Stephanie on the list… well the Grant says Stephanie, you are on MY LIST… The list of GRANT BODY-P!

Aaaaaah sh!t Curtis Axel get serious now! No more AxelMania Royal Rumble sh!t, no more social outcast bullsh!t, time to be that man Mr Perfect and his grandfather raised him to be! Brukk up Bo Dallas blodclart!!!!

That’s f**ked up! All that talk, all that fire in his belly, and Bo Dallas still beat Curtis Axel in his hometown? Er Vince… get the future endeavoured list out…

hiac-laidies

Braun Strowman has the list! He gave it him like… Sami Zayn is not on the list.. and after all that, Strowman made the list!

Oh dear the crowd didn’t like Roman Reigns promo to Rusev! Well you know Roman… he’s straight to the point, no-nonsense… no charisma either… oh well…

Titus – How you manage to wear good suit with those pink battyman socks? What sort of sh!t is that?

Contract signing between sexy @$$ Charlotte and sexy @$$ Sasha! OOOOH Charlotte’s figure… dayum she can join the list too! look at that tight @$$ outfit Sasha got on! She can join the list too! OHHHHHH!!!!GRANT BODY PHENOM

Thank god Mick Foley is true to himself, don’t wear those ridiculous suits or whatever it is WWE force you to wear!

That’s it Mick, let these women see sense about this Hell In A Cell sh!t, they think they fear nothing because they are not fighting Undertaker… seems like Charlotte ain’t listening! Maybe Undertaker himself should come out for real! Sound the gong… come on!

I know that’s what I would do if I was creative…

Foley is trying his best to let these women see reality…sounding a bit like Mankind himself…. he won the crowd over…he’s close to tears here! THIS SEGMENT IS OFF THE HOOK! Now sound the gong… Please!!!!!

They have signed the contract! It’s official! Man… it’s a damn shame Undertaker is not in the best of health as far as his hips. I would have flown him to Minneapolis and strike fear in these women, because if there is one thing I dislike, is WWE Superstars acting like they are not afraid of the cell and take this thing make joke.

Wow – Kendrick and Rich Swann shook hands before their contest! I guess it’s just a personal issue between Kendrick and TJ Perkins!

Wow – TJ says he and Kendrick had a contest 15 years ago, and Kendrick failed to beat him. So this is an ‘ether’ situation…

OH SNAP! Rich Swann defeated Kendrick! Er… can we make this a triple threat thing?

Braun Strowman finally gets better competition! Can Sami Zayn twist him up?

What? Braun doesn’t see real competition? Sami fought the best in Shinsuke Nakumura! He had match of the year with Cesaro! ARE YOU KIDDIN ME STROWMAN? YOU CAN’T WRESTLE NUH BLODCLART!

GRANT BODY-P! –

Strowman walked away from Zayn! Well the Grant Says – I know it’s the video game, but why don’t you take on Grant in WWE2K17? I assure you – YOU WILL GET BUSS ARSE!

Dayum Kendrick is desperate isn’t he? What – he asked TJ Perkins to ‘let him win’? Er Vince… the future endeavoured list!!!!!!

When you hear that guitar riff…. THAT’S IT! THE BEAST INCARNATE IS HERE! Yo – I never told Goldberg to say what he said the last week!

Now bear in mind, Goldberg gonna get booed because it’s in Brock’s hometown!

Oh no! Heyman just put wrestling fans on blast for being fickle! It’s like 80% are chanting Suplex City and 20% are chanting Goldberg!

I see somebody holding a Damian Marley poster! He knows what time it is!

I thought Brock had choice words for Goldberg, then again… bad man move in silence…

I forgot about this so-called Triple Threat match… if the title isn’t on the line, you know Owens and Jericho are gonna combine their force and mash-up Rollins!

Even though it’s gonna be a cheesy @$$ Halloween episode of RAW next week, we got Goldberg again! That’s good!

Rollins is certainly no Austin or Rock – they would be putting beats on Jericho and Owens!

‘No mortal man’s gonna beat them both’… Bryon Saxton obviously doesn’t do his googles er – hello – the two aforementioned guys? Triple TEEF maybe? Undertaker?????? Goldberg? BRROCCCK LESNAR???

HOW THE RARSE DID SETH ROLLINS PIN BOTH GUYS? Yo Saxton – your foolish statement should get you on the list!

Dun know Owens and Jericho didn’t like that sh!t – they rushed him! But Rollins still got fight left! But it only ended in Owens dropping the powerbomb to Rollins spine first into the hardest part of the ring apron – BLAOW!

That was a good go-home RAW.. here’s me thinking I would have to skip a segment and talk about this chick who WWE just gave a tryout to…

elena

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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Monday Night Raw #1214, August 29, 2016!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

So… how was your Bank Holiday Monday?

I saw videos of police ‘daggering’ women at the Notting Hill Carnival… if you don’t know what that is, I suggest you hit the YouTube and type in ‘Dancehall daggering’… be warned – NOT FOR THE WEAK IN BED!

GRANT BODY-P!

In other news: I’ll just leave this here…

IWC PRAYING

Some of you muthaf***az don’t even believe in God, so how you gonna pray hoping for Kevin Owens to win???? This is blasphemy people! I have nothing against Owens winning the World Wrestling Federation Universal Championship, but now those folks at Heelbook posted this, I’m hoping for the opposite! I’m all for seeing you fools angry over some sh!t!

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RAW 1214! ANYONE BUT KO! I CARE NOT FOR THE IWC!

WWF PROPA TINGZ

Now, if I go off on random subjects it basically means RAW is wack in places!

Kevin Owens – the clear favourite here by the crowd! Maybe his time is now!!!!

Big Cass – the dark horse! Not many believes he can win but I can see him bringing a great showcase!

Seth Rollins – with the most talk out of everybody! He’s a safe bet!

However, bad man move in silence… Roman Reigns ain’t saying sh!t! He’s just bringing the pain on all his opponents! That’s right – boo him! THAT’S THE MAN I’M BACKING!

Seriously I’m loving the new stages of RAW & SmackDown! Might be too late for WWE2K to hook it up on the new game!

Jericho’s promo was superb! Neville you are a don but you gonna get the gift of Jericho! You will drink it in!

Very interesting how RAW advertises a Smackdown PPV in Backlash on their stage…

OH NO! The New Day got their hands on Bayley!!!! Look at Bayley whining her hips! Does nothing for me but I bet it does a lot for you guys!

GRANT BODY-P!

They gonna be fighting Dana Brooke and the Bullet Club! This should be a very entertaining contest!

Now, Nia Jax ain’t like most girls… and that’s the type the Infamous Informer likes!!!! Shout out to her opponent from Texas… she kinda cute still… don’t hurt her too much Nia!

The Bullet Club have had a career change! Now they are carers for the retirement home? They are still on The New Day’s case! They recruited Dana Brooke as a nurse! Hey I’m all for sexy @$$ nurses but if Dana is anything like this woman pictured below… RUN HARD!!!!! DON’T LOOK BACK!

Lindsey

Hollyoaks fans – you feel me though right!!!!

Showing a feature on Seth Rollins – the question remains – is WWE2K17 going to keep the curb stomp? Answers on a postcard please – tweet me @MZATheInfamous!

Uh-Oh! Sasha just called Charlotte a coward! She lucky Charlotte didn’t go off on one just like the Miz did to Danny Bryan!

Talking of that – it will be addressed on Smackdowns this week! It will be very interesting to see where this leads!

The New Day – 372 days as W…W…E… TAG…TEAM…CHAMPIONS! Can they beat the reign  of Demolition? I seriously doubt it to be honest people, the competition is too powerful!

NAHHHH! When the New Day were doing the unicorn stampede, they should have let Bayley step in there and stomp a mud hole in Karl Anderson’s @$$ and walk it dry! Missed a trick there!GRANT BODY P

I gotta rate that sexy @$$ Charlotte on commentary, wearing that tight leather leggings complementing her legs…dayuuum! Make me wanna bark like DMX! Where my dawgs at – UFF-UFF-UFF!

GRANT BODY-P!

Bayley and The New Day win against Dana and the Bullet Club! The story here is about Bayley’s momentum, not the Bullet Club’s quest to claim the championships from New Day, so get your head out your arse jabronies!

What’s the score on this Cesaro Vs Sheamus thing? Answers on a p – actually f**k that – I have something better than that to talk about – this goes out to anyone in the area! A signing with friend of the STC – Ric Flair N!&&@!

RIC FLAIR WRESTLECADE

Say word? The winner out of this best of 7 series gets a future title shot? Good luck to them both, doesn’t matter to me! I’m still not watching this sh!t!

GRANT BODY-P!

Fans – friendly reminder – especially you UK fans – quit complaining about the frequent adverts while RAW is on. I know it’s frustrating as hell, but unless you air your grievance to USA Network, nothing will be done!

Massive respect to WWE putting together a package for Mr Fuji… he was so TEEF back in the day!

Aaah sh!t – the sexy @$$ Stephanie is out here to sort out this situation with Brock Lesnar…word is she fined him just $500! There was a parody ‘go fund me’ campaign to help Brock Lesnar pay off the fine!!!!

Now the crowd might be chanting ECW, oh sh!t they are chanting CM Punk! Wait – are we in Chicago? Why don’t they chant ‘F**k her right in the pu$$y’????

GRANT BODY-P!

Has Heyman got one up on Stephanie? She reluctantly accepted an apology, and left the ring… what happened to the defiant slap in the face? I’m not too sure why, but Heyman used a lot of big words – Harvard University style and said something about the ‘Board of Directors’… and it had Stephanie shook… but Heyman throwing dollar bills at Stephanie like she’s a stripper was comedy gold!

While Darren Young tackles Titus O’Neill (ahem…) I wanna introduce to you my latest lust interest… I don’t know what it is about this woman but I would tear her @$$ up!

jenny

Her name is Jenny Scordamaglia people… she’s on a channel called Miami TV…Youtube her @$$. She is the luckiest woman on earth – you know why? Because the Infamous Informer is a retired clubber… and had he be out there… it would be CURTAINS for Jenny Scordamaglia!

If you are familiar with the anime film above, that’s Jenny and I’m the demon. GRANT BODY-P!

Aaaaah sh!t it’s gonna go off! The main event! Roman Reigns! Kevin Owens! Seth Rollins! Big Cass! One of these muthaf***az gonna become te World Wrestling Federation Universal Champion!

WAIT! Big Cass – you can’t describe Seth, Kevin & Roman as SAWFT?!!!!!! Have you lost your mind?!!!!!

…AND THEY ARE UNDER WAY! I got my lilt drink, and my double choc biscuits!

Good lord these four are out to steal the show with big boots! mean clotheslines, flying through and over top ropes!

Look at Kevin Owens screaming at Mick & Stephanie like – IT’S MY TITLE! I don’t think Foley is gonna screw you out the title… I mean Foley of all people… he remembers Survivor Series 1998!

GRANT BODY-P!

A superman punch followed by a kick to the jaw bone and a frog splash off the top ropes and Big Cass is out the game! I knew he lost his mind!

Roman Reigns – you tryna hit too many superman punches! You not gonna win being so repetitive!

Crowd are loving this! All three men refusing to die!

WAIT A MINUTE! TRIPLE TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!!!  He just drop the pedigree on Roman Reigns & Seth Rollins!

KEVIN OWENS! IN SHOCK! BUT HE IS THE NEW! UNDISPUTED, WORLD WRESTLING FEDERATION, UNIVERSAL CHAMPION!

BACKSIDE!!! He snatched the belt from Foley and gave it to the prize-fighter! Even Stephanie is in shock! We don’t know what role Triple plays in all this draft business!

Calling it right now – Roman & Seth will combine their force to take out Triple TEEF! What if Triple goes to Smackdown and takes out Ambrose? This will be the trigger to turn Seth face! Seth could win Royal Rumbles and then he truly Redesigns, Rebuilds, and Reclaims his title at WrestleMania 33. REMEMBER I TOLD YA!

GRANT BODY-P!

 

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