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Tag Archives: Jeff Hardy

Monday Night Raw #1247, April 17, 2017!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

Right… the Soul N Sports massive n crew – they have something every Monday called ‘Best & Worst of the Weekend. Ok so here’s mine…

Best of the Weekend: Kendrick Lamar album – DAMN! Or more importantly the last tune on the album – DUCKWORTH. HOLY SMOKES WHAT A TUNE! Shout out to Styles P & Talib Kweli who also brought forth a solid offering in ‘The Seven’. Both highly recommended.

Worst Of the Weekend: Some stupid muthaf***a shooting down people while on Facebook live like it’s really funny, and muthaf***az sharing that sh!t like the buzzards that they are. Black people are being killed for no reason by police and this sort of sh!t happens. Vincent Kennedy is right – LIFE’S NOT FAIR! YES LIFE SUCKS…and then you – WHOA!!!!

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RAW 1247! You are still the inferior show! You got Alexa Bliss – NUFF SAID!

Gotta open this up with last week’s MVP and trust me – the WWE Universe will WELCOME Braun Strowman!!!

I guess Double R had to pay a penalty for ‘retiring the Undertaker’! That is something you just don’t do!

Kurt is giving Braun the night off – but Braun wants to f**k up people… OR ELSE! Kurt is like – or else what? Why the f**k isn’t there T-Shirts with that sh!t on it? This monster among men is OVER! And I hate using wrestling terminology – Do I look ike a wrestling nerd to you??!!!

Aaaah sh!t! Braun got the Golden Truth! I’m surprised he didn’t get Finlay and Jamie Noble!

GRANT BODY-P!

Is Kurt afraid of Strowman or something? He sent a flimsy referee to tell him he had the night off!

Sorry Enzo, Wu-Tang Tattoo on your arm but Raw is NOT the realest show in the room. How you doin?

That’s f**ked up – Revival only come the other day and Dash Wilder is out the game already with a fractured jaw? 8 weeks out the game – welcome to the main roster muthaf***a!

(They should have went to Smackdown – the A-show… that would not have happened!)

GRANT BODY-P!

You see that movie White Men Can’t Jump? There is a saying on there I will never forget: ‘When you win, you really lose, and when you lose you really win…’ such is the case for Miz & Maryse – they lost the match at WrestleMania but find themselves on RAW – which WWE claims as the A show but me and you (well some of you) already knew it’s not the case… conversely, Cena and Nikki won the match, but Nikki mashed up her neck again.

Deano is right – Miz looks ridiculous in a maroon suit – But this man right here – The Infamous Informer, would make it look good!

Quote from Miz ‘I wear this because this is what SUPERSTARS look like, but you Dean, you just look like ‘WRESTLERS’…whoa… is that an insult to the IWC????

…and the rivalry has been reignited! The Miz dropped real but annoying talk, but real talk nonetheless – talks about how Deano ‘fell off’, finding himself on pre-show, all sorts of sh!t! Deano is like – I don’t care about all that bright lights and sh!t – I just love this wrestling sh!t! I’ll fight for 20 people, 100,000 people, it ain’t nothing!

Next victim – was that Kalisto who Strowman tried to f**k up? Not before he was intercepted by the Big Show!

They haven’t changed TJ Perkins music! I was looking for that Bowser music… and he’s still doing the ‘dab’… is that what it’s called?

Titus has got the idea! Actually he and Apollo Crews wouldn’t make a bad tag team actually… Crews needs CHARACTER – Titus – you can finally make this so-called brand of yours happen!

Notice I haven’t talked much wrestling? Because quite frankly, I can’t be bothered… until now – Fatal 4 Way #1 contendership for the World Wrestling Federation Women’s grant-body-pChampionship… Mickie James – Sasha Banks – Alexa Bliss – Nia Jax… winner fights Bayley at the Payback joint… once again – backing Nia Jax – a part of me wants Alexa to win so she can get buss arse by Bayley…

Then again a apart of me wants either Nia or Sasha or Mickie to buss Alexa’s arse – I don’t give a f**k if she in her hometown! The commentator just said – Alexa is that chick who would break your heart, break your jaw and you would still look at her on instagram – NO SHE’S NOT!!!! THE GRANT SAYS – I’m on instagram @infamousgrantbodyp – and I don’t wanna look at her b!tch @$$… not when I have women like Rosa Acosta on my instagram!

Rosa Acosta

Who the f**k does Alexa think she is? How is she gonna scream at Sasha – ‘This is my division now!’ This is what I mean – the ratchet has NO MANNERS – she was as good as done in the bank statement, but sh!t – Nia did all the damage and Alexa took advantage and is now through to Payback! Backing Bayley 100%!! Promise me you won’t drop any poems Bayley!!!!!

Do you think Heath Slater watches Curt Hawkins in the back and thinks ‘I’m glad I’m not at the bottom of the barrel anymore?’

GRANT BODY-P!

OH NO!!!! Jericho just made a fantastic promo and the Drifter who keeps playing the guitar for no reason just made the list!

Now on to Wyatt… who according to you guys, loses every feud… but check it – what if Wyatt wins back the WWE Championship? Why is Brock Lesnar not scheduled to appear until AFTER Payback?

This ‘House of Horrors’ better be good Wyatt! We don’t have casket matches anymore! Damn…we not gonna have buried alive matches anymore… aah sh!t… I don’t think even I realised how big a retirement from the don of dons really was…

They say Jeff Hardy hasn’t been in a one-on-one match in 8 years. Yes I remember – last time, he was in a championship match against CM Princess Peach B!tch, and Jeff lost the title – if he lost – he had to leave WWE… that’s what happened and CM B!tch run him out the building… I remember cussing at him like – F**K CM P**K! It’s crazy how things change right?

See – I keep it 100 – I was NEVER a CM P**k fan. That was 2009. So you see wrestling fans… my dislike for Mr Brooks dates waaaaaay back…

While Cesaro has his dream match with Jeff Hardy… let’s give a shout out to Angela Yee… that is straight blatant outright teasing right there!

Angela Yee ice cream

Two things – One –  was the mighty RHYNO afraid of Braun Strowman?????

Two – I forgot to mention this earlier – funny how Big Show cussed out Strowman for beating on Kalisto – remember back in the day Big Show used to pick on Rey Mysterio? I suppose he learned his lesson when Mayweather f**ked him up at WrestleMania 24!

GRANT BODY-P!

Once again – The Big Show Vs Braun Strowman – come on guys – BREAK THE RING THIS TIME! One more time – we know The Big Show hasn’t got long left in his career!

Right now, according to you guys – Vincent Kennedy is jerking off until he falls out of his chair!

You mean to tell me Braun Strowman can push over an ambulance but he can’t body slam the Big Show? Oh he suplexed him? Oh ok… carry on…

This is it! HERE WE GO!!!! Or maybe not – counter technique – Strowman jumps off top ropes right into a chokeslam! And Strowman kicks out!

Strowman hits the powerslam supermove and Big Show kicked out! Come on guys – to the top ropes!

HERE WE GO! both guys battling it out! Braun jumps off the top ropes again – this time into a Sean Price punch! Strowman kicked out again! BACKSIDE! Vincent Kennedy must be a mess in the back!!!!

Booker-T said that Big Show would have to send for his big elbow off the top ropes – that was his super move back in the day – but Strowman hit the Superplex AND BRUKK THE RING!!!!! YES!!!! AND STROWMAN IS BACK ON HIS FEET! BUMBACLART!!!!!

Ok – Vincent Kennedy has officially cum. He hasn’t cum like that since he nearly got in Torrie Wilson’s panties back in 2001!

GRANT BODY-P!

#GETINTHECHAIR

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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Monday Night Raw #1158, August 3, 2015!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw

They call him the Rowdy One. They call him the Best Heel of All Time. Well I call him Rowdy Roddy Piper. To be honest, I don’t necessarily agree, but I do think that he sparked off a lot of sh!t. He set the bar of what a heel should be, he set the standard of controversial segments, Piper’s Pit was the Godfather…Now we have Miz TV.

So let’s pay respects to a pioneer, the foundation of this thing we call wrestling. Rowdy Roddy Piper, LIVE ON LIVE LONG.

I’m expecting a 10 Bell Toll for this man. But we gotta keep it moving folks! Just like life, RAW GOES ON! #1158! HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZWasn’t the crowd meant to stay silent through the 10 Bell toll? F**k!n DISRESPECTFUL.

OHHHHH SH!T!!! Seth Rollins can’t wear that shirt??!!! I hope that haters know that if they buy that shirt…. CENA GETS PAID???? (If you don’t know what shirt I mean either watch RAW or look at WWEShop pon di hinternet!

And the crowd loves this sh!t! Knee into Cena’s nose – BLAOW!!!! Cena could be out the game, maybe out for Summerslam too… but it’s John Cena! He will come at the 11th hour! Crowd chanting ‘THANK YOU ROLLINS!’ I’d laugh if Cena’s music hit…

THERE YOU GO! TITLE FOR TITLE! SUMMERSLAM! I think my Co-Host (Shadfather) is right – The US Title gonna get CENALISED!

FOR REAL? Seth is gonna drop a WWE Title Open Challenge???? BACKSIDE!!! I knew Seth was a good man! I knew Seth was a fighting champion! What if Brock steps up???? I hope Seth is aware that he’s in the building!!!

Oh come on!!! The opponent has to be under 6ft tall? Sh!t that’s me out of the running!

FOR REAL? NEVILLE is under 6ft???? WROOOOOOOOOY!!! Go on kid! Get the title! This could be a Jeff Hardy/Undertaker 2002 moment!!!!

NEVILLE IS KILLIN EM!!!! Think of Summerslam Neville! You can headline Summerslams!!!!!

No way! was that a ‘botch’? The ref might have counted to three from that pinning predicament!

Neville hit the Red Arrow on Rollins! ONE, TWO, THREE!!!! OH SH!T!!!! Rollins foot was on the rope!!!! DAMNIT!

Come on Neville! Come on Kid! One more Red Arrow – NOBODY HOME!!!

Rollins Hit the PEDIGREE! PEDIGREE! ONE, TWO, DAMNIT! That match was OFF THE HOOK! Rollins was that close to losing his title! The Ref might be in trouble though! Was there hesitation when he counted Rollins shoulders to the mat the first time?

Kofi Kingston takes the pi$$ when he comes down to the ring in his entrance! Skipping and smiling like a battyman!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Los Matadores mash-up on the outside, and there’s Big E and Xavier laughing at them!!! They remind me of Takeshi’s Castle when the contestants end up in the drink!

Cena might be at home, but The Bella B!tches are here!!!! 253 days!!! Less than 50 days to go! HOLD ON NIKKI!!!

So Paige’s team is now called the Submission Sorority! I LIKE THAT!!! VERY GOOD! Shame it took em nearly a month to come with that name…

Mike Cole now acknowledging AJ Lee’s title reign! UH-OH!!!! You’re standing on Dangerous Ground Cole!!! Too close to the crown, let’s see if you know the bounds!

Team B.A.D. Have got their little shirts and everything! I should get one for my new niece!!! Beautiful And Dangerous! or as I like to call em… B.A.D.I.B. Beautiful And Dangerous INNA BED!

GRANT BODY-P!

The Bellas lose again??? Oh dear… face it Bellas – you’re wack!!!

Come on Team B.A.D.I.B…. you should embrace JoJo! and make her welcome! You could be the Nation of Domina-…. OH YEAAAAAH!!!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

But Yo Naomi baby girl! How you gonna call out Ronda Rousey name??? Don’t run your mouth! You saw what happened to that brazilian chick! 34 seconds later – IT ALL OVER!!!

34 seconds

See the Miz is one of those muthaf***az I can’t stand when it comes to honoring the deceased… it’s so contrived and fake… Bigging up Piper like that… you expect me to believe that? F**KOUTTAHERE!

Cesaro and Kevin Owens are guests on the Miz TV joint… they gonna fight at Summerslams… you know that match gonna be off the hook!

I love the elevation of Cesaro! The IWC are right for once! PUSH CESARO and leave Tyson Kidd at home! Stay home Tyson, clean up the place! Oh hang on – that’s what Shadfather does while you’re away! I’ve noticed Natalya has become more freaky on Total Divas recently… I wonder why that is????

GRANT BODY – P!

Dayuuum WWE still supporting UFC footage of Ronda Rousey dedicating her 34 second beatdown!!!! Dana White you talking sh!t about WWE being fake… the Chair awaits… and you’re my dude because I’m a UFC fan!

What? Mark Henry ain’t 400lbs no more? He’s 399lbs? He’d better brukk up that Rusev dude! But I like Rusev though… oh well – WHOEVER LOSES – I WIN!

I don’t get it – I thought Swerved was axed Shadfather??? Or are you Swerving us??? WWE promoting that sh!t! I don’t get it!

HAHAHAHA!! Sheamus is an honorary Wyatt this week? Actually has a nice ring to it… Sheamus Wyatt… Yo WWE it’s about time y’all started making these Summerslam matches official!

For Real? WACK RYDER is here? And he’s fighting WACK BARRETT? Ok toilet break…

What happen – Wack Ryder lose again?? HAHAHAHAHA!! You see – that’s what happens when you’re CM Princess Peach B!tch approved…you’re cursed for life!

UH-OH!!! Another BUUFTA AWARD WINNING PROMO BY PAUL HEYMAN!

NO!!! PAUL HEYMAN CALLED THE UNDERTAKER A B!TCH???!!!! NO ONE EVER SAYS THAT!!! Heyman you are brilliant but I’m going off to help Undertaker build that casket for you… oh lawwwwd!

Why the f**k did Brock Lesnar throw the stairs in the ring like that? I’ma keep watching…

Oh so he’s standing on it is he? Ok…so according to MR DIRT SHEET, Undertaker asked for a rematch, BEGGED for a rematch against Brock Lesnar the following WrestleMania (31)? And Vincent Kennedy said NO? Can we get confirmation of this Vince?

OH SH!T – is the Don of Dons going to Suplex City??? Heyman is trying to convince me and use that propaganda! He’s very good…. but he’s NOT GOOD ENOUGH!!!

The one thing he’s convinced me of – this match is TOO BIG for WrestleMania???!!!! Personally I think Undertaker & Brock know that their WrestleMania match was not good enough and they want to steal the show, especially as Undertaker is in better shape…

Heyman has pointed out that Undertaker has never beat Brock Lesnar… Yo Heyman, by saying that, Undertaker has WON. that’s not a prediction, it’s a SPOILER!!!

OHHHH SH!T – here comes Paige with her Submission Sorority… COME ON NAOMI! Make this gyal look mash-up for

THE INFAMOUS NIECE!!!

the Austin podcast! Send the b!tch back to freak island!

Oh hang on… Paige wearing the HotRod shirt… she can’t lose this match surely!

Haha I like that! Naomi is battering Paige! Telling her to ‘Kiss My Lights’!!! And kick her in her mouth! GWARN GIRL!

Naomi – I’m not mad at you girl, Paige wore the Hot Rod shirt… give her that one… but any other night – Paige ain’t sh!t!!! Only joking Paige but it is MY WOMAN you dealing with! The one with the most sense on Total Divas, that chick you turn to for advice!

OHHH SH!T! Some fool named Stephen Amell wants to test Stardust next week on RAW… seriously guys who is this fool? Answers on a postcard please – tweet me @MZATheInfamous!

Main event time already??? The Shield and Randall Vs The Wyatts and Sheamus! LET THE RECORD SPIN!!

Ha! The Wyatts & Sheamus had no chance!!!! The Shield & Randall mash them up! All I know is, I’m looking gimmick matches at Summerslam involving all these guys… Roman Reigns and Wyatt fight already so up the stakes with them, Sheamus & Randall fight already so do the same with them! I don’t wanna hear no singles match!

That’s enough for me! Me garne ah mi bed… I was gonna watch the Austin Podcast with Paige… but I can’t be bothered. It’s only Paige… I’ll check it in the week… F**k that…

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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Smack Talk Centre Raw

The Jobber Blogger #120 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 14/8/14

Jobber Blogger hardyz copyOne Hundred and Twenty times, and I’ve blabbed on about crap! Oh yes, good old TNA: Wrestling, Impact Wrestling, WRESTLING WRESTLING WRESTLING!

What a weird and wonderful place you find yourselves in. So putting Dixie through a Table boosted the ratings to continue TNA’s current run of “a good month”, putting the much hyped, four month build up of putting a Woman through a Table the highest rated Impact show since February. Which means! Back in February they had a higher rated show and Dixie needn’t have gone through a Table.

ALAS!

This means nothing really. Well aside from the Network bosses who decide to pump money into your programme. And given that Spike TV isn’t looking so keen on renewing their deal with TNA, I suppose ratings mean everything.

Which is good news to know that the ratings dropped… a lot, this week. Despite this being a better show, but it’s wrestling, so who knows.

Also they didn’t spend four months building the main event. Though the WWE spent a whole year building The Rock vs. Cena and that sucked…. like, really sucked. Which is an interesting point I just made to myself, so I shall mention that later on!

So Spike might renew their current deal, who knows, but they won’t go out of business, but it’s certainly not good news.

What is worse news however is that Alberto Del Rio got the axe from the WWE for slapping some social media guy. Rightfully so, I’m sure. I’ll let you decide if I mean getting fired or slapping the guy.

… getting fired, obviously.

We all knew it would be the next step, there is the big news of a WWE talent getting fired, or quitting or being “released” then it’s the “Why?” then it’s the TNA factor.

TNA have made a career off of bad business moves of bringing in bigger named talent, dropping the belt on them, doing nothing, getting a few weeks of ratings, pissing off a lot of fans, pissing off the talent then big name star quits and it’s done.

Happens, every, single, time.

So yes, TNA apparently went right after or at least wanted to go right after getting Del Rio with the added boost of wanting to drop the Heavyweight Championship on him right away. So that’s awesome brilliant thinking. Are we seriously thinking that in 2014, after 12 freaking years, the same stupid guy has a job that does this and thinks it’s a good idea. Lets be honest, Del Rio, really isn’t all that good. Del Rio most certainly isn’t better than the talent you already have. And are you really, really, going to throw away your build up and planning and developing to just put it on the new guy whose name has some cache with a bigger company? Are we really still doing this?

For a company that has the best locker-room in the industry, they are damn lucky, most of them have still decided to stick around, because when your as stupid as to do this, all the time, you don’t deserve to be in business.

Sorry but, James Storm, Bobby Roode, Austin Aries. Sort them out first. Samoa Joe, Eric Young, Jeff Hardy, Bully Ray sort them out next. Then focus on your new talent in the following years. It’s just frustratingly pathetic, that I hope, and pray, this actually is a work, and TNA have finally decided to poke fun at the same mis-steps they always take.

Want to solve your ratings / network problem? Here’s a hint, Don’t Do The Same Thing Every Body Hates! AGAIN!

bluelineImpact Wrestling Logo

TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 14/8/14

bluelineWell I started productively then thought you know what, I wonder how many guys came from the WWE and won the TNA title in little to no time at all. That goes to wikipedia, that goes to youtube, then you find your not even watching anything remotely relevant to why you went looking in the first place, and I guess that’s the beauty of the internet.

Or in other words, a waste of time.

Clearly.

Hot off the heels of Dixie going through a table, and yes to keep up to date with the time scheduel, this was 7th of August that the Impact show aired with Dixie’s power-bomb, funny enough days after this current TV Show was taped.

So they must have had to ruin a lot, or just one show?

I lose track, but it’s confusing, it doesn’t really matter, but I like to know that the Audience are at least up to date with what’s happening, otherwise it’s distracting.

Bully kicked off the show talking about, of course, putting Dixie through a table, and then went on to talk highly of Devon, and so Devon showed up.

Yes, we’ve all forgotten how Bully kicked him in the head, then joined up for The Aces and Eights, then also betrayed him, now they’re a team again.

It’s wrestling, got it.

Then something rather cool happened, we knew from the week before about this match, but just having Matt and Jeff confront Bully and Devon, in 2014, in TNA. It’s a little weird.

In a lot of ways the Hardyz seem much less accomplished that Team 3D, given that Jeff by himself has had more singles success than all of them combined.

Also this guy obviously didn’t know Matt was in town

handfan

Obviously we all know the history between these two teams, but again, it’s just weird to have the Hardyz back together as it is, through them in the same ring with Team 3D and it’s like what happened. I grew up with this, now it’s 2014 and the ring has six sides and everything’s gone crazy.

I guess we didn’t really need a banter filled history lesson, but I can let that slide for nostalgia purposes, what I really didn’t need was TNA’s horrible editing.

They do it all the time with the taped shows, maybe the segments go on too long, but it’s so un-organic it ruins what magic can be found.

The chants don’t build up they just “appear” with a crowd shot, then they’re gone and it’s back to talking, or a quick reaction from Bully, then back to Matt.

It’s very jarring and very annoying. And it really taints the moment they’re trying to create. The moment is there, it’s happening, but you’re cutting it out. I suppose I can live with the horrible editing of a forced history lesson promo to set the main event, because it’s one hell of a main event.

bluelineLow Ki vs. Homicide vs. Manik vs. Crazy Steve vs. DJ Z vs. Tigre Uno – 6-man Tag Team Scramble – X-Division Number One Contender Match

Yup, that’s a match type you won’t forget in a hurry.

Because of how the show is presented, you already know which guy will win. Given that only Low Ki got a Televised entrance, you know from that alone they view Low Ki as the favourite, biggest star, and clearly the one going to win. Given the last few weeks of TV Time, it’s no surprise either.

The jury is still out on whether Low Ki is even sticking around. I don’t think he’s signed a contract.

But whatever, he’s awesome, so I can get with it. I’ve never understood the appeal of Homicide. I don’t get why he keeps coming round. I know he has a fair history with TNA, but he doesn’t come across impressive in the least to me.

He does the odd flip or crazy jump, but that’s about as far as it goes, and he does that with no grace.

Poor Crazy Steve was the first to be eliminated followed by of course Tigre Uno. Yup, that trend continues.

Least he wasn’t the first to be eliminated, that would have really annoyed me. I’d rather Steve didn’t go straight away either, but given his character it fits.

What worries me is that it seems Uno knows he’s being underused, because he took his limited time and pulled out all the stops. He’s fantastic, I don’t get why they’re not using him better than just to fill matches.

I say it every episode he is on, but seriously:

tigre uno fn

In the end of course it was down to Low Ki and Homicide, again, don’t get the appeal.

But they did put on a good bout, hard hitting, fast paced, good wrestling.

Low Ki won… didn’t see that coming.

No chance he will defeat Samoa Joe in his first X-Division Championship defense, but it could start off a nice feud.

bluelineEC3, Rhino and Spud hit the ring to talk about last week’s actions of putting Dixie through a table. EC3 called for Bully to be fired, which brought out Kurt Angle – who is on the WWE track again, sick of hearing about that.

Kurt instead got them all arrested, I guess it was kind of funny. Maybe this is supposed to be the “end” of them too, but I don’t think we’ve seen the last of it. Which basically means, Dixie is gone, but she’s not gone.

The show was built around the footage from after the Show, Dixie’s condition, an interview with Dixie next week, EC3, Spud still around. It’s not done with at all. So what was the point? People don’t want it on the show, you’ve ended it, leave it. But we all know they won’t, so it’s going to go on, and drag out a little bit more, and a little bit more, until just like Dixie and Bully themselves, nobody cares anymore, and they didn’t care to start with. Move on.

bluelineMr. Anderson vs. Gunner

This match happened.

I’m not sure what the crowd was doing during this match but they seemed to go onto (I believe WWE’s Fandango dancing and theme) onto other random crowd chants.

Which means they were whole heartedly invested in this match up.

Samuel Shaw ran down to “break up” the fight, which led to Anderson punching Shaw, which led to Shaw beating up Anderson, which led to Gunner breaking them up.

It’s really not all that exiting, plus it’s on the same trend as TNA’s current trend of not trusting people. I’m fairly confident Shaw will turn out to be using Gunner all of this time.

And Anderson is really the one who is right, but looks like the bad guy. Been there done that.

bluelineBiggest news from Impact, JR Tweeted about Dixie going through a Table, and they showed it. Doubt this means anything at all, but JR has been positive about TNA for a while, surely they would listen to him and take his advice. I think it’s the actual “in ring” segments of Wrestling he enjoys… you know, from a Wrestling show.

JRTNA

bluelineAngelina Love vs. Velvet vs. Gail Kim vs. Taryn Tarrell – Knockouts Championship

Isn’t it far too soon to be playing the only card Wrestling can think of, the competition between friends. Angelina and Velvet are “butting heads” already, again, again I might add. We’ve been down this road before too.

With the same people.

Again.

I’m still rather confident there will be a “surve ball” in here somewhere and the Beautiful People pretending to have issues will be the downfall of Gail’s current Knockouts Championship run.

Least that is wishful thinking, I suppose that would have to go to Velvet. Which is cool, she’s only held the belt once, and it wasn’t for long.

Taryn dived off the top rope to the floor taking everyone down, living up to her crazy and short legacy.

Something I really liked about the New York fans is that they do seem to respond well to the Knockouts, and I mean the Knockouts actually Wrestling. I respect that.

To be honest I respect any Wrestling fan that actually gives respect to the Wrestlers. I was a little appaulled by some fans in Manchester when I was there last year who were booing the Knockouts and yelling for them to get out the ring. The Knockouts Division in TNA is one of their strongest assets, they need to grow it more if anything.

The Beautiful People wouldn’t let either of themselves win, and Taryn cleaned the ring (and somehow managed to take herself out of the ring with a clothesline), Gail then dropped Velvet with Eat Defeat and retained her Championship.

bluelineLashley, MVP and Kenny King vs. Eric Young, Austin Aries and Bobby Roode

TNA is a bit all of the place currently, I’m not quite sure where things are going to go.

Bully and Dixie has been centre stage so long now, that the World Championship really doesn’t feel that relevant.

They are obviously building Roode, but with Team 3D and the Hardyz etc taking the Main Events, it doesn’t feel like the right place for the Championship, or even that Roode seems to be the right guy to take the belt.

Another reason we don’t need Alberto Del Rio.

One thing is for sure though, and that this match was awesome.

MVP is still limping around, but King, Lashley, EY, Roode and especially Austin Aries are all on top form. Put them together in a match that is fast paced, impactful and continously moving, it creates something special.

It really is hard to look at Roode as the favourite, even though Aries lost to Lashley, and then again lost his match, just in the ring, Aries is on another level to everyone, always is. How do you put that in second place.

MVP hit Aries with his Crutch behind the Ref’s back leaving Aries ripe for the Lashley spear, and the win.

bluelineThe Hardyz vs. Team 3D

What can I say. Team 3D walked out in their old school Camo, Matt and Jeff, well they’ve always looked fairly similiair to how they look now. Though if they both rocked the black jeans, Matt with his black shirt and white stripe on the sleeve his big arm bands and Jeff the same with his arm bands (also how cool are Jeff’s Arm Bands) I would be giddy if they did that.

Still don’t think the music is impactful enough, but it works alright.

I don’t know if it’s just my childhood nostalgia, but this was something. My favourite Wrestling Promotion, my all-time favourite Tag-Team the Hardy Boyz facing off against their best opponents, Team 3D easily the best Tag-Team in Wrestling history. Just something to behold, in 2014.

From the get go I was hooked, but to make it all that much better, this match was fantastic!

Which if you remembered at the start of The Jobber Blogger I had a rant about The Rock and John Cena. Well as a young Wrestling fan, obviously The Rock was one of my favourites too, who didn’t like him?

Though 2003 Hollywood Rock heel run – his best work, ever!

Aside from that, let’s move on.

Rock wasn’t all that great as a Wrestler, obviously he as an entertainer, untouchable.

But as a young Wrestling fan, you don’t really pay attention to the neuances of Wrestling technicality.

Which is why when Matt and Jeff go up against Team 3D, it was magic then, and it was magic now.

Though the difference would be all of them have stayed active in Wrestling, Bully and Devon completely re-shaping themselves psyhically and mentally, Matt and Jeff going through what they have, and Jeff easily being in the best position he’s ever been, with his best Work he’s ever done, right now.

So yeah, it’s not apples to apples here.

If there is anything that bugs me about this match, is two things.

One, I feel Matt and Jeff could have pulled out a few bigger patented Hardy moves, but then, they should also save them for another time.

Two, Devon kicked out far too easily from the Twist of Fate and Swanton.

But of course the 3D is just pure awesome as a Double Team move, so credit goes to Team 3D, and even though I’m a Hardy fan through and through, no matter what. Team 3D should have picked up the win, and they did.

What more can I say, if you grew up in the same Generation as me, then you will no doubt feel the same as a I do.

Fantastic match, utterly awesome from in the ring, just to the moment of itself, to nostalgia to everything.

Match of the Year nominee, no doubt about it.

Team3DHardyz

bluelineImpact was a packed show and it was a great show. A shame they took a dive in the ratings, because TNA do deliver a lot of great work, it just falls short.

Hardcore Justice is coming at us next week, and given that it’s still in New York, it’s going to be brutal.

Bram vs. Abyss – Stairway to Janice

Samoa Joe vs. Low Ki – X-Division Championship

Six-Sides of Steel – Number One Contendership Match for the World Heavyweight Championship

bluelineShould be awesome.

Something that is probably smart, but also not as awesome is TNA moving to Wednesday nights in America.

Thursdays have always been their thing, aside from when they had the guts to go head to head with RAW, and didn’t really make a dint. But kudos to trying.

TNA want the ratings, and WWE is thinking of shifting Smackdown back to Wednesday.

I think it really sucks that TNA at least won’t try and go head to head with WWE’s second rated programme. I understand it.

It just feels a shame, and it almost feels like a step toward the end of their Spike TV contract.

I hope the Spike bosses love the shows and Wednesday prove successful, either way, TNA needs to find a new home, because even though they make dumb errors almost constantly they still put on a great show.

And when they get it right, They Get it 100% right.

TNA fan till the end!

Till then,

Dan Wilkinson

www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

www.TheJobberBlogger.wordpress.com

www.TheSteelChair.com

TNR Cover 12 (w facebook address)www.cageamateursuk.com

The Jobber Blogger #119 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 7/8/14

Jobber Blogger logo2

Well, the infamous One Hundred and Nineteen issue of The Jobber Blogger! It’s taken a while to get this up and running.

Seems fate is against me this week, or at least timing, but it has helped me to “adapt”. Yes, in a string of “firsts” I’m going for something I’ve decided to call “Write’N Watch”.

Yup, WNW, or wNw for those nWo fans out there (salutes), I haven’t even seen Impact yet, so it’s all loaded up ready for me to breeze through and enjoy, and I shall make notes of each segment as usual, then jump across and get typing. Time is of the most import, and also time is the issue. Also power cuts.

A string of Birthdays, break-downs and power-cuts (oh my!) later, and it seems I’m ready to roll!

See you after the first segment!

Impact Wrestling Logo

TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 7/8/14

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Bram vs. Abyss – Monsters Ball

So yes, TNA kicks off with a Monsters Ball match, which is a pretty decent way to start a show where your Boss goes through a Table.

It’s all ECW based folks, and that kinda sucks. But Monsters Ball has its place within TNA, and thankfully so does Abyss.

What is a little jarring is how much they are plugging Dixie going through a Table, which is also the Intro Video package to this show, right after Bully and Dreamer talk about it (before it happens), making a promise. Then the video package saying it does happen, then Taz and Tenay asking the question “will it?”

I’m confused in this time-travelling plug of a show.

time travelSpeaking of Whaa, I like Bram. I’ve said it multiple times, but I like his image, music and his intensity.

Intensity is exactly what this match was, Abyss brought Janice into the match, but did the old “swing and a miss” into the Turnbuckle. That’s when Bram grabbed a Chair and took a swing, but Abyss elbowed it back into Bram. I only mention this because Bram’s selling of the elbow to the chair to his face, was excellent! I enjoy to watch people fall to the floor convincingly in a fake manor.

Also this guy

shyguy

Also totally got you on The Jobber Blogger! I’ll MAKE YOU FAMOUS!

To the Seven people that might consider reading it.

Bram went back first from a choke slam onto the Thumbtacks (I don’t remember it looking that nasty before). In the end though, Magnus got involved stealing Janice from Abyss, Bram speared Abyss through the Barbed Wire board, then hit Abyss in the stomach with Janice and took the win.

Interesting that Bram has defeated Abyss again in a Monsters Ball match. Interesting indeed.

Also Bram took Janice with him after winning the match, fairly sure this is leading somewhere. If it’s anything like poor Dixie, then Bram will have to eat a good shot from Janice sooner or later.

Back to the show!

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It feels like I forgot to come back and Write the rest of this. As it turns out. I didn’t.

MVP, Kenny King and of course Bobby Lashley took to the ring. Which is neat, it really does feel these three have taken a back seat, despite Lashley being the World Champion.

So it is nice for them to step up and get a moment to talk, even if it’s a little thin.

Though it is nice to see MVP floating around, I still don’t know where to place him in the company anymore, but once he’s fully back to being healed, either legitimately or storyline, we might have a better idea to see where he goes. Hopefully against Austin Aries.

On the plus side, MVP did make me chuckle whilst describing Aries’ recent World Championship match from last week, and I quote:

a double air linesI don’t know what it is about Wrestlers and their Ass obsession. Right on queue of “who else is there for Lashley to beat” out comes Bobby Roode. Who incidentally had this to say about MVP:

“I’m not out here to talk to your Ass!”

Would be a totally different show if he was… o.O

Fairly obvious Roode would be next in line for a shot at Lashley, though I wouldn’t be surprised if it took him a few months to get a Fair match, at Bound for Glory.

But if I’m honest, right now, I want Lashley to win. I miss having long Championship reigns, and they come with someone who is legit. TNA doesn’t have anyone who fits the mould of a undefeated World Champion better than Bobby Lashley.

Kenny King went on the attack with MVP to follow, which brought our Eric Young and Austin Aries. So there you have it…

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The Bromans vs. Mr. Anderson, Gunner and Samuel Shaw

It was actually nice to see the return of this flimsy “when it fits in” storyline. Also The Bromans, I do like the Bromans.

But let’s not beat it around the bush, this match only took place to further the storyline between Anderson, Shaw and Gunner. As plainly obvious from this gem of an entrance

anderson this freakin guy

Anderson wouldn’t tag Shaw, and in the end pushed him out of the way to take the Tag for himself from Gunner, of course leading to Shaw “coming to the rescue” but Anderson got caught with a Roll-Up, and was pinned. Blaming Shaw, etc etc.

Least it’s better… and a lot worse, then where Shaw was before. I suppose his whole Creepy Bastard idea was rather neat, and the creepy moments with Christy.

Still think Gunner needs a bit of a boost.

I’m starting to think I’m just writing what you already saw, and then in that case… why!?

I would upload a Face Palm picture.. but I really don’t have the effort.

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Team EC3 vs. Team Bully Ray – 8-Man Hardcore Match

I forget what the actual title for this match was.

But hey, it was pretty damn good! I’m not one for getting all into ECW revival territory… again, but it is cool when it’s done right. Thankfully it was done right. Shame it keeps getting brought up rather than moved on from, but they all have their connections to TNA anyway, so it does fit.

No idea if Snitsky and Ryclon are going to be hanging around now, same goes for Rhino and Dreamer. Be nice to see Rhino stick around, maybe even Dreamer. Who knows. It was short lived the first time Dreamer got involved and somewhat uneventful, but I’m glad he’s kept in touch and works behind the scenes.

Also Al Snow made an appearance, which usually isn’t that spectacular, but having the audience with their “heads” going crazy, is pretty damn cool, so I’ll give him that. His spring-board moonsault to the floor however, didn’t seem quite as impressive, but that is mainly due to the fact it looked like if he was actually caught, he would have plummeted on top of his head.

Crazy fast paced Hardcore match, and it was awesome. Also how cool is the 3D. When it’s done right and comes out of nowhere, it’s a super cool Tag-Team move. Glad Devon is back, nice to see Team 3D at work again, and a good choice for the Hall of Fame.

Also I think half way through the match Rhino suddenly remembered he left the iron on back at home…

rhino face

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The Beautiful People tried their best to get Angelina Love her fair and due – rematch. But in turn Hot Mess herself, who for some reason struts around like a Drunk, decided to whine about how Angelina broke up the match between herself and Gail Kim recently.

This is the thing! A face, would always get a fair rematch, Angelina is due one, I know it’s storyline, but it bugs me, it doesn’t make sense. I hate having either “total Heel” control or “total face” control.

total face control

Least I can blame Kurt and feel somewhat better.

So yeah, next week, Gail Kim defends the Knockouts Championship against Angelina, Taryn and Velvet. Fairly sure Velvet and Angelina will throw a curve ball about “breaking up” and also Brittany should get involved… and then Madison. Then ODB, then whoever else.

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Sanada vs. Samoa Joe vs. Low Ki – X-Division Championship

Storm kicked off the match, first with a backstage promo to Sanada, then to introduce Sanada. It’s just a weird fit. I can’t take it seriously, and don’t buy for a second a guy like James Storm would want to be a “master” having people bow to him. It’s just weird.

Tough love is put on Sanada regardless.

On the other side is Low Ki and Samoa Joe who had a little face off earlier on in the night. Low Ki did some rather Mortal Kombat inspired voice for his promo, which seemed very out of a place against a guy like Joe. Joe can cut a promo, because he does it from his heart, he’s himself, and he’s good at it.

I didn’t make many notes for the match itself, though very good. All three of these guys are the kind of talent you want to stay in TNA. Low Ki is just different to anyone else, which I suppose they all are, but Low Ki is a special bread, so I wanted him to get the Championship with the hope he will stick around this time. No idea if he will or not.

Sanada rolled up Joe into a bridge pin which was counted into Joe’s submission hold for the Tap-Out Victory.

Suppose it makes sense for Joe to come back into the division, he’s a fan favourite, and what better way to re-define the Division than to put Joe back as the figure head. Still want Tigre Uno to have a run. Or at least a match with Aries, make it happen!

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And last but not least, Dixie for no reason at all goes to the ring with her hired hoodlums, insults them, fires Snitsky and Ryclon (good run). Then Bully, Devon and Dreamer take centre stage. I think I threw up a little when Dreamer said “extreme pipe bomb”. Thankfully King Mo punched him in the face so we didn’t have to.

I think it would have been a little better if it “happened” organically. Rather than booking a segment to do it. So it’s pretty much going to happen.

Either way, we can be picky all night, Bully pretty much put himself through the table and just pulled Dixie back closer to him. But what matters, is that it was a moment, and it was cool.

The entire TNA Locker-room stopped Dixie from leaving, and so Devon escorted her to Bully to powerbomb her through a Table.

The fans went nuts, TNA chants rattling my speakers and it was a moment that makes you proud to be a TNA Fan.

I love the crazy TNA Chants! That’s what bugs me the most about the ECW chants creeping in, we have something cool, that is ours, that is real, and that’s TNA. Support that and chant that, and it’s magical.

I think this is supposed to be the end of Dixie Carter on Television, which would be nice, least for quite a while. She’s had a good Heel run, and it’s the most fitting way to send her out.

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I hope things are going to keep moving with this, and actually push a new direction for TNA.

Still no news I don’t believe on their TV Deal with Spike, they’re at least on air till the end of September with No Surrender.

Till then!

Dan

www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

www.TheJobberBlogger.wordpress.com

www.TheSteelChair.com

TNR Cover 12 (w facebook address)

www.cageamateursuk.com

 

The Jobber Blogger #114 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 3/7/14

Jobber-Blogger-logo2

The Jobber Blogger

Well here we are, my first Day Off in over a week (new job included) and I’m spending it Writing up this week’s TNA: Impact! Yes that’s dedication folks! But you know what, I do this to myself and set it as my deadlines, I actually plan my week around being able to watch and Write up Impact, and I love that.

It gives me structure and I honestly feel it’s warranted and relevant, and I look at The Jobber Blogger as a type of “work”, so it needs to be done, and I’m happy to do it.

You will also be pleased to know Impact didn’t suck this week, in fact it was a good show! Some of it sucks, but that’s only in terms of how they’ve decided to film it.

But let’s not focus on that too much, I shall save that for when I get into it, and no, I won’t talk about my random Guardians of The Galaxy binge spending! Else we’ll be here for a while!

fannobbly

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Impact Wrestling Logo

TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 3/7/14

Yup, it was the day before Independence Day when this aired, and funny enough weeks and weeks before it when it was filmed. I’m sure the New York tapings were done on the 26th or 27th (or both) of June, which means this was filmed what, a week or so prior to that.

The Television Tapings suck ass. Sure back in the 1990′s it’s fine, who can spoil anything. But it’s 2014, everything that happens is splattered all over the internet, and I’m doing my best to avoid anything from the New York shows, because I’m sure they’re something special.

Which brings me to my most enjoyable and biggest gripe from this week’s show. The fans in attendance, have NO IDEA what’s going on. They would have seen Slammiversary and possibly the show after that. I guess they might have known Bobby Lashley is the World Champ, but they wouldn’t know that Kurt Angle is new Director of Wrestling Operations, or that Bobby Roode is indeed a good guy again. Unless TNA started their show by spoiling it. Which might be true, they did start the tapings in the UK I attended last year by filling people in on what happened.

I like the idea of people just turning up and the show they watch is like far in advance of the show they last saw. It’s a weird mix of when it airs, and how early it was filmed and how much more they’ve filmed already. It’s confusing and annoying, it ruins the “spark” for it not being live.

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Anyway, Kurt Angle kicked off the show introducing himself as the new director of wrestling operations, and making his first order of business to reinstate Earl Hebner, much to the joy of some over excitable dude in attendance.

Fanhebner

Stupid “firings” don’t mean anything, everyone knew he would be back, and never even went. The only decent thing was Feast or Fired, and thankfully Chavo got fired and we’ve not seen him since, Huzah!

Angle then got out a piece of paper calling it his “Cheat Sheet” because he’s made so many good matches he couldn’t remember them. Or in other words “we weren’t prepared enough”.

When someone apparently running the show needs a piece of paper to remember anything and read from it, that’s a bad sign going forward right?

Angle then made a series of matches, but Samoa Joe took offense to him being left off the list and decided to call out Kurt on being “just like everyone else”.

Sure Joe then spun it on the whole “you love the World Title, how long will it be before you give yourself a shot”, rather than the “we all know you don’t want to be in TNA, and hope to leave in a few months, so why would we trust you to do a good job!”

Which the latter would have been far better, if people actually call Kurt out on his pro WWE motives.

Either way Angle and Joe got a bit heated with Angle saying “that’s the Samoa Joe I want to see” and Joe saying “careful what you wish for”. Which pretty much means naff all. Joe’s been stale for many years now and keeps hinting at his “true self” and then never does anything. I’m a little board of Joe now, if I’m honest.

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Knux and The Freak vs. Jesse and DJ Z vs. The Wolves – World Tag-Team Championships

We saw the very end of Jesse and DJ Z’s entrance and then the entirety of The Wolves’. TNA put so much time into making The Menagerie something “different” and their entrance best exemplifies that, so to continuously skip it, surely devalues them?

I was wondering where Robbie E is, but apparently it’s because of his Clown Phobia. So no idea what’s going on there, or if in fact he will be back to do something related to it soon.

Rob Terry wore a different mask in the ring to the one he wears for everything else, and I don’t hate it. I do however hate his stupid ridiculous neck tattoo. But for the character he’s playing it’s fine, but to think he looks that dumb in his personal life, well…. it’s kind of stupid really.

terry tatoo

Taz did have a bit of a slip up when talking about the Freak stating “even if he is a man!” which I’m sure he meant in a Man vs. Monster type of way, but obviously came across far more gender orientated. Funny stuff…

Davey Richards got the hot tag and closed out the match quickly taking a Win for the Wolves.

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Bobby Roode vs. Kenny King – Street Fight

This marks Roodes’ first match back, earlier on in the show he went after MVP but got attacked by King, hence forth making this match. Angle found Roode and Roode told him what happened, so Angle tried to solve the problem, but it didn’t dawn on me till MVP and Kenny King started joking about the “principles office” and telling on people, at just how stupid and immature this all made Roode look.

I kind of hope it’s a running gag now, that if anyone attacks Roode it’s all “are you going to run and tell on me now?” I’d laugh.

tattle tale roode

Roode barely got any reaction despite the fact TNA are working hard to pushing him currently. I love Roode, and I think he’s back at the fan base level, but obviously those in attendance have no idea where Roode stands. Wrestling really is dumb at just how quickly people move around and jump between Heels and Faces.

Roode and King brawled around the arena for a good while, then brought a Chair into play. A good physical match, and if anything I enjoyed King’s mouthing off trash talking the most. In the end Roode hit his “Roode Bomb” still hate that name, on the Steel Chair and took the win.

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Brittany called out Madison Rayne so she could apologise for not taking Madison’s advice seriously, and how she made an error blah blah blah. I can’t say I exptected Brittany to attack Madison, but I certainly didn’t rule it out. I thought it would be more that she would say whatever to bring Madison closer to her. To then eventually turn on her. But hey, just outright beating her up worked too.

I can’t help but notice that Brittany had a good bit of Blonde in her hair, Beautiful People…. mmhmm.

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Ethan Carter the Third vs. Bully Ray – Tables Match

One of the main things to take away from this match is just how good both sides have been in their current positions on the roster. Bully is a ridiculous good guy, because he really shouldn’t be. I do think he’s great at getting the fans going, but better if he didn’t pander to the other baby faces quite as much. But either way Bully got the crowd going every step of the way, and just as a counter measure, EC3 did very little to draw the heat on him. So together, they work very well.

I think about this a lot, but Bully didn’t look at himself as a “TNA Guy”, he views himself as an ECW Guy. Which is fine, the “guys” are those who are usually responsible for building their respective brand.

But when you think about it, Bully was in ECW for I believe 4 years, the WWE for 6 years and TNA for 9 years. So next year, Bully would have been in TNA for longer than both ECW and WWE combined, which in my opinion, makes him a TNA guy. Not to mention the fact that he’s had the best years of his Career and his most success whilst being a part of the TNA Roster.

Either way, Bully had EC3 up for a Power-bomb through the Table when Rockstar Spud delivered a Low-Blow. This led to the return of Rhino, no idea if Rhino is “back” or just doing a couple of dates like before. I’m sure we knew he was coming back for the New York tapings.

Rhino ran for Spud, then stopped and Gored Bully instead, aligning himself with EC3. So interesting to say the least.

I do like a good return and Rhino’s was rather unexpected, even better when they return with a pop and turn. EC3 then put Bully through a Table for the win.

Despite how much Bully is walking around talking big, he’s been getting his ass kicked for ages now. I don’t remember the last time he won.

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Gunner and Samuel Shaw turned up on Impact, last week was the final segment I presume of Shaw in his padded cell. Gunner being able to get him out as long as he is in constant care of him. This is a weird idea, the whole Shaw thing has been weird since the get go, but I don’t hate it, I’m intrigued. I like the fact that they bumped into Anderson first who obviously wasn’t best pleased to see Shaw. And then of course they went to visit Christy for the same reaction. I’m starting to think Shaw is putting it on, and Gunner will have to feud with him. Oooo, maybe Gunner ends up getting committed and comes back rather weird, now that would be interesting!

Gunner Warrior

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Gail Kim vs. Angelina Love – Knockouts Championship

I don’t know how to word the introduction to this match. This is the kind of match that makes me “feel” something. And I shall explain that by saying it was fairly obvious who was going to win, but me personally, didn’t want that to happen, so I hung on to that hope.

Velvet kept getting involved, and Gail did an awesome job of selling her being pushed into the Turnbuckle post from the outside. But alas, poor Velvet got removed and Gail was on fire.

This pretty much just goes for the whole “Good guys dominate” now that Kurt Angle is in charge.

That hope I held on to was present when Angelina connected with the Botox Injection as Gail was climbing the Ropes, sending Gail to the floor. I was fairly sure it was count out victory time till she insisted on pinning her.

So yeah, Gail won.

I do very much so like Gail, don’t get me wrong, most cases I’m fine with her winning and being the Champ. I just love Angelina so much.

Regardless of all of that though, this match was fantastic! I’m even tempted to mark it down for Match of the Year nomination territory! Probably won’t be when I look back on them…. but I also will do it anyway! Coz that’s how I roll. Also role.

gail kim champ

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Eric Young vs. Bobby Lashley – World Heavyweight Championship

Roode gave EY a motivational speech, which EY pretty much delivered to himself now I come to think of it. Either way, Roode and MVP came to ringside but both were sent to the back.

The match pretty much focussed on EY’s endless struggle to mount any offence on Lashley, and also injuring his leg in the process.

EY put up a fight, but Lashley dropped him with the Dominator and then Speared him for the Victory and retained his World Championship.

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I do like Lashley currently, I think the whole “non talking” with MVP as his manager type of deal is maybe too much Lesnar territory. But Lashley is impressive, I like the fact he didn’t need to do anything to win, other than be himself.

I don’t look at him as James Storm level’s of danger, violence and bad guy territory, but currently, I’m happy for Lashley to beat down the opposition.

Though they did beg the question “who can match Lashley”. Which really, there isn’t anyone.

 

Till then,

Dan Wilkinson

http://www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

http://www.TheJobberBlogger.wordpress.com

http://www.TheSteelChair.com

TNR Cover 12 (w facebook address)

www.cageamateursuk.com

The Jobber Blogger #113 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 26/6/14

Jobber Blogger logo2What a weird week!

So yes, this is going up late again, I know. However, what you might not know is that this is probably the first time where I’ve ever watched Impact so late. Least since Challenge TV first started airing Impact on Tuesday nights. It’s been all go, and lots to do and to think of what is different in just one week…. is crazy.

Well, I have a new job, and whilst on the topic I would like to give a big thank you out there to the people that actually made it possible. This includes Dan and Jon from CageAmateursUK (now StrikeTapandGrapple) they were the first people to pick up my blog. Of course David from TheWrestlingPress, but in a lot of ways it’s The Steel Chair’s own Adam Carr that helped me.

To I think I started this blog purely to just write about Wrestling, give myself something to Write about each week and see what happened. But in turn, it led me to understand a lot about WordPress, SEO, and all kinds of website knowledge that actually helped me get my new job. So a big thank you to those and of course to The Jobber Blogger!

So yes, this might in fact move my plans a little later than… planned, but it’s all about settling in and finding the routines. This weekend has been packed, new induction thrown in, work all weekend then straight into a new job. It’s been go, go, go. But now I can actually plan my time a little better, so hopefully, The Jobber Blogger will keep to his newly out of time watch plan schedule of clock ticking chimes time.

So TNA Impact happened this week. I feel it’s almost bad on purpose to let everyone get excited for the New York shows. If that’s so, then they succeeded. Here’s why!

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Impact Wrestling Logo

TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 26/6/14

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Angelina Love and Velvet Sky vs. Gail Kim and Taryn Terrell

Yes, Impact kicked off with a match, and I love the Knockouts! Well, okay technically there was a bit about MVP, Lashley and King arriving, but it’s not even worth mentioning…. aside from that there mention… which is there, before this part…. etc.

I love how Velvet Sky manages to make Angelina look so much better every week. Is that weird? Angelina having White leg warmers made her look better than the black ones Velvet wore. That’s Wrestling journalism 1-o-1.

So here’s the main thing I took away from this match.

Taryn whoAnd no, part of me is tempted to run my “Hot Mess” banners again from last year, with my never ending struggle to understand just what the hell that nickname meant. No, what I mean this time, is that Taryn is being billed as “someone”. And really, she left just before she got going. She was the referee, but I barely remember what she looked like, aside from what she wore and her hair colour. I remember Gail then treated her bad and Brooke Hogan added her to the roster. Then Taryn and Gail had what, two matches, then she left.

So for her to “come back” as this… Star, seems a little weird to me. Though Taryn was very good. Which then brings about my gripe, she seems much….. less good, now.

Of course part of me is just looking for how she managed to have a child and still look that slim, same with Madison. And then I am obviously more consciously looking for errors and “rust”. Clearly she will have been Wrestling and Training long before her recent return, but she does look a little “out of shape”. Not in a disrespectful way, but she seemed to struggle keeping up her stamina whilst running, and her top-rope cross-body block, whilst good, nearly missed.

Or here is the other side of that story, she’s teaming with Gail Kim. Now Gail Kim is perfect at Wrestling. Like literally perfect. Wrestling never looks more fake then when you watch the Women wrestle, least.. most of them. They seem to stumble a bit more, they’re a tad slower, maybe even more cautious. This isn’t a complaint, just an observation.

However Gail Kim is the opposite of that, she Wrestles, and does it extremely well, she’s very fluid, very fast, always on point. Which means when she’s working “with” someone, she can usually cover most of the other parts easily. However when there is her, and someone not as good, it shows.

All in all, I am glad Taryn is back, and I’m sure she’ll be up to speed in no time! In the end though Gail picked up the win on Angelina with Eat Defeat. Also just because you all asked so nicely, apparently…

Hot Mess 1

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MVP and Kenny King made their way to the ring accompanied by random Girls, as that is clearly the sign of success and celebrations. You know, sex with strangers, and hence forth… disease.

This was big old Bobby Lashley “THE DESTROYER!”‘s celebration of being the new World Champion. Something else I found interesting, Lashley is just being called… Lashley. Seems they are giving him the Brook treatment.

brooke lashley

MVP prattled on about conquering the world because he has the World Championship in his stable. This still makes no sense.

EY came out fighting and got beaten down, leading to Bobby Roode once again jumping the guard rail to save him. And EY wasn’t annoyed that Roode didn’t do it earlier “last week” and help him, oh I don’t know… win?

Roode then had to the usual “Since day one!” speech that means your credible. Also he had to praise Eric Young’s work and fighting spirit, which is also another check box to be a good guy. And then last but not least, my new favourite hated phrasing “Time to get TNA back!” with the added bonus of “For each and every one of the fans!”

Oh how I hate that. Thankfully TNA swerved this same old crap nicely, so I’m pleased.

This blessing came in the form of a badly executed package of crap named Earl Sullivan Armstrong, who appeared like a cross between Clint Eastwood and Sam Neill, Sam Eastwood you could say… or Clint Neill.

clintneill

Also sounds like a nail-product when spoken quickly with a bad accent.

This though is better than the Kevin Nash lookalike who turned up last time. Or that other chap who looked like someone else I don’t remember. Anywho, so this “Board of Directors” dude came out and fired MVP from the role of Director of Wrestling Operations, which is much better then just dragging this out to be a match for Bound for Glory. It seems maybe TNA wants to please fans, and going back to the six-sided ring, planning a really big show in the New York tapings and clearly finding Slammiversary was such a success when it had little to do with all of this crap.

Then Roode punched MVP.

batman flop

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DJ Z vs. Manik vs. Crazy Steve vs. Sanada – X-Division Championship

The second best match on the card.

Again, they probably didn’t need the silly intro backstage to set up this match. The X-Division usually works best when they just… Wrestle.

There isn’t really much to say to be honest, other than Crazy Steve was awesome, Manik is impressive (unless he takes his mask off or talks) and Sanada won… obviously.

TNA really annoy me when they make things so obviously… obvious, then push it down your throat just in case you didn’t notice. How many times do I need to be told about The Great Muta and his connection to Sanada now, guess what, after 4 Months of heading it every time he’s on the Show… I don’t need to hear it anymore.

So when Sanada wins, Mike Tenay adds “The Great Muta must be pleased”.

Really? Must he be pleased. So basically he’s not going to be pleased, he’s’ going to be pissed. They are going to fight, something is going down. It’s obvious, you telling me directly it’s not, makes it more obvious. Don’t say anything… then it’s better. I can see it now, “The Mentor, The Apprentice, They Were Once Like Brothers!” SHUT UP! It’s Crap! CRAP CRAP CRAP!

CRAP DAMN IT!

that's crap

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In what was yet another annoying segment, Dixie Carter and Spud made their way to the ring to celebrate Dixie gaining back control over Wrestling Operations. The very fact it was laid on so thick about Dixie believing to get it back, well you know what I’m going to say anyway.

And in fact, this guy in the crowd also wanted to say what he pleased, and TNA seemingly were happy to air it…

fannoonecares

He could have meant, “no-one cares you suck” in which case people are happy to see Dixie. But I’m sure he meant, just that no-one cares what she was saying, and that she sucks. It was a weird mix of “informative fan” meets “idiot fan”. No-One Cares Dixie…. also you suck, the whole you suck part therefore means he like most are in fact… stupid.

Guess what, I don’t care what he says, in fact I’m sure No-One Cares about this guy’s opinion.

As always Dixie managed to draw a huge negative reaction, and I must admit, I chuckled when TNA showed a shot of an old woman in the crowd covering her ears. It looked like she was hating the loud response from the fans and how horrible Dixie indeed is. But then, I’m fairly sure she didn’t even want to be there and got dragged by some relative and hated the experience. Still…. chuckled.

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Ronson Johnson Blackhead – the board of Directors guy then came back out to tell Dixie she wasn’t the new Director of Wrestling Operations. They’re going to need some snazzier, punchier titles, this is getting hard to type!

Of course, Spud stole the show with a Spit-Take which would only have been better if he had indeed took yet another sip of Wine, and then spat that part out too.

Blah blah blah, Dixie whined, Bully Ray came out (to an awesome reaction I might add) and Bully got his hands on Dixie, with her being pretty close to going through a table. Woop.

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James Storm vs. Mr. Anderson

This was a little bit weird, fairly sure their feud wasn’t that engaging the first time. So now they’re dragging it out a little longer… because why not. I do think that Gunner and Sam Shaw could fit into this somehow, so there you have it. Perhaps they could be the bond between Storm and Anderson.

Regardless of anything, anyway, Storm is awesome. The best Heel on the roster by far, the very fact he’s not in the main event scene right now pains me. If only I could write TNA! I REALLY WANT TO!

Anderson hit his rolling slam thing…. mini green bay plunge, only he “injured” himself. Which I’m sure was a work, but it looked pretty damn authentic, so kudos!

Anderson tried to drop Storm with a mic-check but Storm held the ropes sending Anderson down by himself, he got back up groggy to yet another awesome Last Call Superkick.

What was more out of character perhaps, and also interesting, was James Storm seeking out Sanada backstage, giving up a bit of abuse and then adding on the pressure of Sanda’s X-Division Reign, and if he will cash it in for a shot at the World Championship, and not to “chock” trying to win the big one. So perhaps something could be interesting coming out of this.

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EC3 and Tommy Dreamer had a fight!

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Magnus and Bram vs. Abyss and Willow – Monsters Ball

I have to admit, I like the team of Willow and Abyss, I liked their promo, I like them together. Fits. Magnus still looks like a gay man.

gaymagnusAnd with a name like “Magnus”… that’s not good at all.

Yet again, Bram impressed me. I love how he moves around, I love his crazy stare, and really intense attitude. He’d fit well with Gunner and Storm. Not so much Magnus.

The Monsters Ball never disappoints, and this was the second in recent memory, and again, didn’t disappoint. Obviously the highlights were Willow climbing to the top rope only to have Magnus throw a chair at him and he fall off the top through the Barbed Wire Board, scary flash backs to Daffney, that Guard Rail looked too close for comfort.

Abyss then choke-slammed Magnus onto some Thumbtacks, which is weird, you don’t normally see Magnus in that kind of environment. In the end though it was Bram who did this awesome creepy stalking thing on Abyss then hit him in the stomach with Janice for the win.

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boundforgloytokyo

So this took me a little by surprise, this year’s Bound For Glory is going to be in Tokyo Japan. This has me really, really excited. I honestly can’t wait to see it, I know this might sound like sarcasm, but I’m being serious,… seriously.

I’ve obviously seen Wrestling in Japan before (on TV of course) but not a full show like this, an American PPV, in Japan. That excites me, I’m sure we’ll see Sanada and The Great Muta and probably a lot of other Japanese stars too, so yeah, very unexpected, and totally pumped!

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And of course the show then ended with the reveal of the “new Director of Wrestling Operations”. Which was also blatantly obvious. Though I’m slightly more interested then I was actually seeing Kurt in action, than when I just assumed it would be Kurt.

Also the no-one cares fan now suddenly cares.

fanyes

MVP, Lashley and King made their way to the ring to confront Kurt, who didn’t back down, and even went a little… weird.

And then made a World Title Re-Match next week with Lashley vs. EY and then reinstated Bobby Roode.

Roode and EY then started fighting Lashley and King, and that was it.

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This was Bobby Lashley’s first week as the TNA World Champ, and to be fair, I almost forgot he was the new Champion. It was very understated.

Either way, TNA have done a nice job of correcting the main dragging issues with their show and finally putting an interesting angle on it. Literally. Kurt Angle.

interestingangle

 

Till then!

Dan Wilkinson

http://www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

http://www.TheSteelChair.com

http://www.TheJobberBlogger.wordpress.com

TNR Cover 12 (w facebook address)www.cageamateursuk.com/News.co.uk

https://www.youtube.com/user/heywhatism

The Jobber Blogger #110 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 12/6/14

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The Jobber Blogger

To think, 10 issues ago was issue 100. There’s some math to kick you in the knee caps! Or shins, if you happen to be a strange alien being at the mercy of one Captain Kirk’s instinctive kick to the groin… accidentally.

Well, that could potential be the most inappropriate way to start this, but hey, what could be better?

Yes TNA heads toward Slammiversary, live tonight actually in the US. But the question is, does their “go home” show deliver. I may have come across a little “negative” last week, and while this week’s show didn’t annoy me as much, I was very much so looking forward for it to end.

When did that happen? 1 hour and a half of Wrestling and I’m bored. The main event should be the thing you want more than anything, but yet, it was just the same old tired boring routine. On the plus side, the same old tired boring routine has had a little bit of a shake up! And yes, that’s good!

Impact Wrestling Logo

TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 12/6/14

Sadly, Impact did not kick off with a match, but a match wasn’t actually far behind. The TNA World Champion – Eric Young made his way to the ring (in Wrestling attire… a pretty good give away) and called out MVP.

A whole load of un-necessary garbage later the theme for the show was set. EY was going to war against MVP, Lashley and King, and should be able to win, he gets to pick the stipulation and have his “fair fight”.

Eric Young vs. Bobby Lashley

Believe it or not, but Lashley was the only one between he, MVP and Kenny King to be dressed to compete, it’s like they pre-planned this match?

Either way, this took me a little by surprise. Which is the best way to describe TNA’s main theme this week. See when it was set that EY needed to defeat MVP, Lashley and King, I therefore assumed it would be a handicap match. King again making orders (somehow) claimed EY couldn’t even defeat two of them, and so the challenge was set. Again, I expected this to be 2 on 1. But no, it was a gauntlet… with gaps. EY had to compete in three matches to get his fair fight, all of them spaced out throughout the show, which as it happens… seems fair. Too fair really.

It gets further confusing when Lashley makes quick work of EY, beats him down, injures his back, catches EY mid air and Powerslam’s him to the mat and picks up the win.

My instant reaction was, Awesome! EY got his ass kicked by big bad Bobby Lashley and now EY can’t name his stipulation. Nope.

Just because he lost, doesn’t mean he still can’t win. A stupid idea. Surely if MVP was that bent on having the advantage, it would be a handicap match. Should it not be that, giving a slight edge to EY, it should be that EY wasn’t able to actually lose. He lost, straight away. That should have been the end of it, and quite frankly something I wasn’t expecting. I was expecting an entire show where EY “defies the odds’!” phony injury and all. Still.

Lashley wasn’t done and Samoa Joe came to his aid, thus pitting Joe vs. Lashley at Slammiversary in a mid-card match no-one gives two craps about seeing.

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Now That’s Booking!

Magnus and Bram made their way to the ring. Bram looking pretty intense and awesome and Magnus looking like he has a hard time selling the idea of him being intense and awesome. He looked like a presentable version of Bram. I hope Magnus can pull off the gimmick, but right away he’s the less impressive guy in the ring, Magnus works being Magnus, Bram is a natural at playing this crazy intense violent dude. So Bram debuts as this “crazy intense violent dude” and I believe. TNA then tell me “Magnus is just as intense, crazy and violent” and I don’t believe it. Put them side by side, one is trying, one works. So the former World Heavyweight Champion – veteran – Magnus, now looks less legit than the new guy…..

good booking

Good Booking!

Magnus was given the same old crap speech to explain himself. I really don’t think he needed to, nobody really cares enough, and he’s playing a heel, it’s not like he’s changed, he just ditched looking smart for Bram’s clothes.

Magnus blabbed on about “they” changed him to who he was. Yet this entire “change” apparently only covers the few Months where he was Champion, not the how many years he was the exact same guy beforehand, only without a Championship and catchphrase.

Willow wobbled his way to the entrance ramp, and actually did an alright promo. Jeff sucks trying to be himself, he is charismatic in everything, but dialogue. So Jeff being even more awkward as Willow is just… awkward. Unless they edit it with snazzy effects and reverb, then it’s kind of cool. Jeff jumped between his two personalities, and I actually expected him to ditch the mask and return to being “Jeff Hardy” again, but instead he didn’t. He did however talk about “we”, which was quite good, I’d rather have Willow come out with a blow up doll dressed like Jeff to compete. Instead, Abyss turned up. Abyss obviously back with issues against Magnus, so now it starts to make a bit more sense.

He still looks sort of stupid though, and not at all intimidating like he used to.

Robbie E (w/ Jesse, DJ Z) vs. Knux (w/ The Menagerie)

The Menagerie is this weird blend of good ideas and poor execution, which is always TNA’s staple of work. For instance, the idea of The Menagerie is quite good. The Freak sucks. Crazy Steve is awesome, yet rather than being more awesome, he’s sort of more “comical” and that makes him child friendly in my eyes, rather than being creepy and dark. His look is creepy and dark, how he moves is creepy and dark, the way he snaps is neck around is awesome creepy and dark. But then he’s being stupid, and with the rest of them (namely The Freak who is also known as Walking Stupid) undermines Crazy Steve’s credibility and potential, I feel, at least.

I like having the music playing and crazy lights, but then it always puts the advantage to Knux, they used to do the same thing with the Bromans, so it would be better if it went back and forth a little.

The match was alright, but it has far too many moving parts and gimmicks on both sides for there to be anything to dig your teeth into and get to know anyone as “wrestlers” or characters.

Knux didn’t have too many problems in picking up the win, with multiple distractions on both sides. Crazy Steve then tied his balloons to the back of Robbie E’s trunks, so he freaked out and ran around stupidly. Kind of funny, I get the whole having “characters for everyone” but The Bromans, especially Robbie are very credible in the ring, it would be nice to see Robbie given the chance to be a bit more serious at times. Though Tigre Uno has recently said he’d like to Wrestle Crazy Steve, and implied that he’s very good in the ring, so I’m anxious to see him actually Wrestle.

Ethan Carter the third and Spud brought out “Brooke”. Or Miss Tessmacher, or Brooke Tessmacher, correctly called Brooke Adams. Can’t they just call her that now?

It was awesome to see Brooke back, she’s one of my favourites, aside from the whole “sexualised gyrating move set she does”.

Despite the fact Brooke turned heel very quickly, ditched the fans, got a new persona… got written off of tv for months and months, she’s now back and a face. But whatever, Wrestling, get it.

EC3 was hoping to learn some dark secrets about Bully Ray, but the whole segment got vastly better when Spud took charge.

Spud who put the spot light on Brooke and removed an envelope with evidence that Brooke’s child is indeed Bully’s. Obviously, entirely incorrect information, but highly entertaining. Including everyone’s favourite – the Titan Tron pictures. With a side by side of Bully and some random Baby.

More Spud.

Bully came out to Brooke’s aid, with a horrible, horrible idea of Bully apologising to Brooke and telling her how awesome she is, including a Hug. We don’t need to see that. We all know Bully is married outside of Wrestling, the whole Aces and Eights thing was a good idea, he ditched Brooke when he lost the belt, he’s a bad guy. Now he’s a softy good guy, it’s almost difficult to watch.

EC3 then challenged Bully to a Tables match, which was then one upped by Bully to a Texas Death-match.

Okay, theory time.

Bully Ray is on Dixie Carter’s side. They needed a way to eliminate MVP and the control he has, the best way to do that is give him the power, with Dixie being entirely sure MVP was just as corrupt. And he was. Bully was thrown in the mix to “fool” people, just like The Aces and Eights. Only this time, perhaps more clever?

So my guess is in the end Bully won’t put Dixie through a table, because they are aligned, and always have been. Perhaps even with Bully getting back the World Championship. As far as EC3 and Spud are concerned, Dixie clearly has no issues with throwing them to the hands of Bully just to get her company back and prove a point. That’s my theory. Bully is being “too good”.

suspicious bully

Eric Young vs. Kenny King

This was the match of the night, King is a fantastic talent, and I love the current position he is in. Against EY, they both put on a great match, and The Royal Flush – King’s special move, is awesome!

Though a little annoying he just then spent time showing off rather than pinning EY, a clear sign we know how the match is going to play out.

EY then hit the Pile-Driver on King and I cringed, again. You could see King move his head up a little too early, but I don’t blame him one second. The whole move is just bad. I don’t know why they are continuing it. I guess if all parties are happy to do it, fair enough. But it’s almost like “the pile driver will set us apart from the competition”. There’s a pretty damn good reason why they don’t use that move, and I wish TNA would be the same.

Brittany vs. Madison Rayne vs. Gail Kim – #1 Contendership – Knockouts Title

It’s a little annoying that these number one contender matches need to take place, and usually do just before a PPV. The Knockouts have some interesting stories going on currently, can’t they work them into a Title match without having the randomly win an opportunity.

Brittany spent the first part of match copying Madison, and also doing her best to help her in a 2 on 1 type of situation.

Angelina and Velvet crashed the match to join commentary which led to a great little line from Tenay “right in the midst of this three way…… excuse me”.

Madison obviously got more annoyed with Brittany and in the end hit her. Angelina and Velvet made their way to the ring to try and help Brittany win but instead assisted Gail Kim who dropped Brittany with “eat defeat” and is now the Number One Contender.

I wouldn’t be surprised if Brittany joins The Beautiful People, only for them to abuse her and beat up or something. Also remember Taryn Terrell is expected back, would be pretty neat if she were to join up with The Beautiful People too. Not to mention the Von Erich’s are coming to Slammiversary, so perhaps a possible reunion with Lacey isn’t out of the question either.

MVP vs. Eric Young

Yes the main event is here, and it’s the very same main event they were planning for Slammiversary. And it was boring.

Lashley and King beat down EY before he got in the ring, MVP power-bombed EY into the Corner Turnbuckle which looked very, very dangerous how he landed.

In the end MVP just got a Chair and beat up EY getting himself disqualified and thus giving EY a victory so he can pick the stipulation. MVP’s plan of course was just to beat down on EY, which makes sense I suppose.

EY chooses a cage match. And thankfully MVP injured himself recently on a house show and cannot compete tonight, so the match has since been changed, which actually makes the card much more exciting.

So rather than having EY vs. MVP in a Cage for the World Championship, EY will instead face the Winner’s of the Bobby Lashley vs. Samoa Joe and Kenny King vs. Austin Aries matches in a Triple-Threat Cage Match for the Main Event. So well done, the main event is now a little more exciting, and two randomly booked mid card matches (aside from King and Aries to be fair, should be awesome) are now much more interesting.

Speaking of Slammiversary!

Willow (/Abyss) vs. Magnus (w/Bram)

Angelina Love vs. Gail Kim – Knockouts Championship

Bully Ray vs. EC3 – Texas Death Match

Bobby Lashley vs. Samoa Joe – Number One Contender – Main Event

Kenny King vs. Austin Aries – Number One Contender – Main Event

James Storm vs. Mr. Anderson

EY – vs. winners – Triple Threat – Steel Cage- World Heavyweight Championship

Plus the Von Erich’s, plus the TNA Hall of Fame inductee 2014.

Should be a good night, I aim to have my Write up for Wednesday!

Till then!

Dan Wilkinson

www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

www.thesteelchair.com

TNR Cover 12 (w facebook address)

 

The Jobber Blogger #86 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 9/1/13

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The Jobber Blogger

Well I think it’s safe to say Writing these blogs are a pain in my ass! And trust me, I’ve multiple related Ass-Pains over my life. What was my last Ass-Pain you say? How about slaving over a 6’500 Word Article on the Best of TNA Wrestling to get one Comment! ONE! Sure it’s an awesome comment and I humbled, I beat my original record, and last year’s Blog got One Comment also.. but that one was negative. So a Hearty “Up Yours” to that guy! I’ve improved!

I did plan on my opening Paragraph to be entirely Wrestling based, and it kind of was. So let’s say this, TNA close out the year 2013 in awesome fashion! WHAT?! Yes, we all know this episode was filmed weeks ago, and it only just aired now. HOWEVER! It Was Immense!

Immense is a word I barely use. And speaking of barely anything, I just realized I’ve completely moved on from what I was originally going to Write about, to drift into something else, to then forget to Write about that and eventually come back on the rails to the ending of the first thing I forgot.

WRESTLING!

Impact Wrestling Logo

TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 9/1/13

Yes, all of the above is indeed Irrelevant, but what is an Elephant is that TNA put on one hell of a show and it showed in the Ratings as they smashed the ratings getting the best viewership they’ve had in months. Which just kind of sucks because I’m sure it had all to do with AJ coming back, and now he’s gone, so that was the end of it. But it does show that their plan is working.

But what made this show special Mr. Blogger, well sit right there Timmy you over eager bastard, and I’ll tell you!

Dixie kicked off Impact by bringing out AJ’s final TNA contract, the Contract for “one more match” and then that’s it. AJ with his Phenomenal music and all came down to the ring, it’s a little bit gay (yes, gay, used the in the most correct of circumstances) that he didn’t just play “Evil Ways” for the entirety of his entrance, but as they say… “fish on a flop.”

The whole segment was Dixie enforcing her role not allowing AJ to speak, changing the match to a No Disqualification and declaring “I will never rest till I don’t have to see your face again”. With AJ’s best efforts to say there are guys in the back who hate her as much as he does, Dixie stated they won’t help him as she owns them too. But one phrase I thought was rather “nifty” again the correct use of the word, is that AJ claims the TNA World Championship has never gotten more respect since he took it away from Dixie Carter.

Everything from Dixie not having a Clue as to running a Wrestling Company throwing every single bit of Negativity TNA has garnished in its entirety back at her. The whole thing is just like a recent “Shoot” AJ has done:

I have my own ideas as to how this is all going to play out. TNA has been criticised for years, and they’ve taken everything thrown at Dixie and made her a heel because of it. That is her accepting to it and taking the heat from it. AJ leaves, Jeff leaves, maybe even Sting, Joe, Storm, you name it. Jarrett sets up a new company, TNA originals (and favourites) jump ship, Dixie continues to bury TNA till they both face each other again. They can blend the lines, it’s a whole re-brand – re-start for TNA I’m sure of it. Everything from the Six-Sided Ring to going back to that style of Wrestling, they can pull in the old audience and a new audience and do something that has never been done before. What else would all of this be?

Either way, Magnus and AJ had a good face off in the ring, and it pleases me to actually say that. I’ve always liked Magnus, and AJ, but neither have been great on the mic, and they both were. They made it feel like a huge match, with huge potential and high risks. So well done!

Eric Young and Joseph Park vs. The Bromans (w/ DJ Zema Ion)

Dixie had a flurry of backstage segments “motivating the staff” like Gail Kim and Lei’D Tapa as well as The Bromans, though Robbie E did seem a little unwilling.

Isn’t it great to have EY back on every show, I do wish he went back to his old crazy attire rather than the Wrestling attire, or a new “scientist” attire would be pretty good.

The match was cut short with Gail and Tapa beating down on ODB in the back, this of course led to EY running to her aid and leaving Park at the hands of The Bromans. I am still confused this whole “Abyss is back!” from the Monsters Ball means… he’s not back at all. And in fact, not even been Abyss at all, he did nothing against Bully and got his ass kicked against The Bromans.

I still can’t emphasize just how much I love Zema Ion in his current role, it’s genius and cracks me up every time, I can’t get enough of it. And in the end The Bromans hit the “Bro-Down” on Park and won the match. Then proceeded to take apart the Guard Rail and bring that in the ring to repeat the move, “injuring” Park and taking him out of action for the remainder of the night.

 James Storm hits the ring and calls out Gunner, claiming he’s been a part of some of the best Tag-Teams in TNA and in the Wrestling Business altogether, but one thing tears them apart better than anything else, and that’s the World Championship.

The thing I like about this, is that Storm has reasons to be annoyed, playing the face, whilst Gunner is actually the one in the right but portrayed as the Heel. It’s awesome like the clever idea of turning CM Punk Heel against Jeff Hardy, it was so well done, that the fans literally turned him Heel by doing the same thing he would have done anyway, just Jeff’s star power as a face is what turned the fans.

Storm and Gunner shook hands for “one more match” with the World Championship shot on the line, hanging the Case back up. So I fully expect Storm to stoop to Bobby Roode level of success or “Beer Bottle” to defeat Gunner. Bridging the gap for a potential Beer-Money reunion! Oh Please let that happen!

Samoa Joe vs. Ethan Carter the third

Joe got in Dixie’s face about her treatment of AJ, and her desire to rid him from the company. So in return he got in a match against EC3. EC3 however jumped Joe backstage already wearing him down before the match got underway.

Just like EY and Park before, Spud got involved, which lured Joe out to attack Spud, and also like Zema beforehand, Spud is doing an amazing job.

The distracting led to EC3 hitting Joe in the leg with a Wrench injuring his knee and the match being thrown out.

Joe was then advised by medicals to leave the arena.

After this show, if anyone thinks AJ’s leaving still isn’t a work, they’re crazy.

Kurt Angle vs. Bad Influence – Steel Cage Match

In preparation for next week’s battle against Roode, Angle laid out an open challenge. Which was met by Bobby Roode bringing down fellow EGO team mates Kazarian and Daniels to do battle with Angle.

I don’t get why Steel Cage matches have the pull that they do. If these led to TNA’s viewership this week, then what’s going on with that?

Though the match wasn’t too bad, usual run of the mill Cage Match really, which also led to this funny picture:

my name is kurt angle

Angle pulled off the second rope German Suplex, with Kaz “moon-saulting” down onto Daniels, then getting Angle Slammed and Kurt picks up the Win.

Soon after however, Angle was posing for a Photo Shoot then Al Snow pulled up and shouted Kurt to get into the Car, it’s an emergency and he needs to get him out of here and to an airport. Which is super interesting, Al Snow has just taken Jeff Jarrett’s role backstage, and now it seems he’s in cahoots with Dixie and gets Angle out of the way. More reason not to believe Jarrett isn’t in on all of this thing as well, it makes sense. And clearly is that way already in Storylines.

Bobby Roode vs. Sting – Steel Cage Match

Backstage Sting found both James Storm and Gunner knocked out from Beer Bottle shots, and that is when he decided to get in the face of Dixie also, “what happened to you?” So this is his punishment for doing so.

Bobby Roode on the other hand is aligning himself with Dixie, and this is his way to prove that. So I like the faction that’s building, clearly they can’t run all of the “good guys” out of TNA and make it a pure Heel show, though that would also be pretty neat.

Given that not so long ago Roode got praise from The Rock, it seems he has taken that to heart as he has been working on development the old “Rock Flip”. After taking certain moves Roode is starting to flip and flop around the ring like Rock used to. Is that insightful Wrestling journalism?

Sting locked on the Death-Lock when EC3 and Spud ran to Roode’s aid, EC3 distracted Sting as he climbed up the Cage as Spud threw a “Baton” to Roode, who then used it to beat down The Icon and escape the Cage.

A weird “turn of events” on Impact was Anderson and Bully Ray’s confrontation. Anderson determined to put an end to it went back to the Church that held the “Funeral” for The Aces and Eights. Which is also where he found Bully, sat at the back. Bully did the more “biblical” type of speech thing once more as the weird music played out again. Everything from Anderson taking the Colour’s from him to trying to set Anderson on fire last week.

Bully apparently left Anderson a “present” in the Coffin, which I believe was some type of White Clothing or something, not quite sure. Then “dun dun dunnnn!” Bully had left as Anderson turned back around.

Don’t know what on earth they are trying to do with Bully, but I don’t hate it, and I’m actually rather anxious to see where it all goes.

Speaking of where things go, next week is Genesis, the first Special “PPV” of the Year and it’s packing the following:

Bobby Roode vs. Kurt Angle – Steel Cage Match – If Angle doesn’t win, he can never be inducted into TNA Hall of Fame

Sting vs. Ethan Carter the third

Madison Rayne vs. Gail Kim – Knockouts Championship

Mr. Anderson vs. Bully Ray

I’m hoping Anderson and Bully might get to Main Event again, though it will probably go to Roode and Angle. Still, it looks interesting and I can’t wait to see how everything plays out, especially in the aftermath of this week’s show.

AJ Styles vs. Magnus – Undisputed TNA: World Heavyweight Champion

While people want to blab on about this is what WWE did with CM Punk, and they’re right. However I think TNA as using that formula and taking it one step further.

To say this was a match, is crazy, it’s an all out battle with chaotic…ness.

Magnus “tweaked” his Knee getting out of the ring, apparently, but unlike the usual match where you know people are going to run in, you have the usual “match” then something big happens where they’re both down, or the ref is taking out, and then someone gets involved. Nope, none of that crap, we know all along Dixie is going to try and screw AJ at every turn, and it’s right off the Bell.

EC3 and Spud hit the ring in no time attacking AJ, which is when Sting comes out to his aid.

Now Sting went crazy again backstage at Dixie after his Match with Roode, but Dixie wanted Sting to know that if she wanted him “taken out” he would be, rather it was a message, and she wants him on her side (Which would be really interesting actually). Instead Sting came out to help AJ.

The Bromans and Zema then hit the ring taking out Sting. AJ managed to mount some offense back but Bad Influence then took out AJ right away.

Magnus jumped in ready for the Count but Earl refused to count the three. Even pushing Spud around as he does. So as Earl leaves, Dixie brings Brian Hebner to the ring.

AJ again fights back, throwing Zema out of the ring right on top of the Camera man, which was pretty awesome actually.

AJ then locked on the Calf Killer to Magnus then Kaz takes out Brian Hebner so no Ref to see Magnus tap.

Sting takes out Bad Influence, AJ hits the Styles Clash on Magnus but no Ref. So Earl Hebner comes running back out to count, Spud does this awesome “pathetic” dive to stop Earl which was hilarious.

Everything was all over the place, and totally fantastic. AJ did this great Dive over the ropes taking nearly everyone out. In the end it was Bobby Roode who pushed AJ off of the Top Rope then hit his Death Valley Cutter thing Three Times on AJ before Magnus went for the Pin.

Dixie dragged down Referee Stiffler I believe, who then counted the Three, leaving Magnus as the Undisputed World Champion, and AJ had no chance whatsoever to win.

So what does all of this mean? I’m pretty sure it means AJ is not done in TNA. If he truly felt the way he did, of course he wouldn’t have gone through with a Match like that. This match screams “STORYLINE” and “ITS NOT OVER!”

It’s just beginning whatever it is, and it was an awesome show. I love random craziness and unpredictable out of control shows. It’s what The Aces and Eights should have been like. I am sure all of this is connected, and I can’t wait to see how this all plays out next week and for the following Weeks. Nor can I wait to see what the “Main Goal” of it all is either, but I’m sure it will all fall into place, and be something rather special.

Till then, we’ve got Genesis next week!

Dan Wilkinson.

www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

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The Jobber Blogger #85 – The Best of TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 2013

Main BannerIt’s that time of year again when everyone rolls out their “Best of 2013”. Last year I believe I did it on Boxing Day, but for 2013 it was stuck in my head from the get-go as to who would be that “Break-out Star” or the best match.

Being the first Calendar Start to Calendar End year that I’ve been covering TNA every single week, I had quite a back-log of Notes to flick-through to find my Favourite Matches and refresh myself on my favourite PPV’s etc.

But something you find pretty quickly is this, If you Remember it, then It Was the Best.

Though saying that, that phrase doesn’t ring-true for everything, there are many matches through-out 2013 that had twists and story developments that you remember just for that fact alone. Same goes with the infamous “Wrestler of the Year”. But I shall get to that as we roll out the chosen Winners.

First I would like to take a Look-Back on 2013, the things TNA tried and failed, the Changes and the Stand-out moments they delivered.

PPVS a year

2013 was the first trial period of cutting down on the PPVs. Something that makes sense to me. Not every PPV is this big spectacle and huge event. So TNA eliminated them, we had Genesis and then nothing till Lockdown in March. As the year rolled on however and the idea of Destination X came about in July, they then brought back their Monthly events as Live Televised Specials.

From doing that, the “PPVs” stood out with being something big, like Slammiversary and Bound for Glory, going into next year just to be Lockdown – Slammiversary – Bound for Glory I believe.

Which means every Month in between they will have their Special Shows but aired Live on Television for free, this format seems to have been drawing bigger Ratings for TNA, so that’s smart. The PPV Buy-Rate has been dropping over the years, and it’s clearly a going-out-of-fashion market. If TNA can capture a Streaming Service or Subscription like the WWE Network, then they could quite easily capitalise on this Audience further.

On the Road

Going on the Road is something Hogan and Bischoff wanted to do since the moment they stepped foot in TNA. And let’s face it, it makes sense. Sure the Impact Zone was cool and they had all their equipment there to produce good lighting and effects. Wrestlers gravitated to TNA because they didn’t need to Travel so much, so that gave them plenty of “Me Time”. But for a Wrestling Business, the same faces in the Crowd every week, and those horrible “Tourists” who clearly walked into the Building thinking it was some kind of “Attraction”. You need to be on the Road.

The best Impact’s from the Impact Zone were always the ones right before the PPV. People would fly down so the Universal Studio would be packed with TNA fans. That’s what you want.

Take your show on the Road and guess what, TNA fans turn up, and different ones. Not only that but different locations expands your awareness, meeting new people, bigger crowds etc. But just from a Television perspective, the Show excels with a good crowd, that’s what Wrestling is based on. And the Impact Zone didn’t have that every week.

Though on the downside is Money, and TNA seemingly have taken quite a hit on that front over the year of 2013.

In the end though, I feel going on the Road was a big deal, and though now they are looking to secure somewhere to carry on how they used to. That’s a big step back in the wrong direction. Wrestling shows need their passionate fan-base, people don’t like it if it’s not Live television because now with the internet, it gets ruined. And let’s face it, the Wrestlers work best when they respond to the crowd, and to get the best crowd, you go out and find them. Not only that, but they pay to come and watch TNA, so hopefully they can figure out a Schedule that works best for them, both in quality and money stability. CutBacks

Going on the Road drank the funds rather low for TNA, now not stupidly low, they have a rather rich foundation. But 2013 saw the release of a lot of Stars, either from Cut-Backs to them just leaving. Doug Williams, Joey Ryan, SoCal Val, Matt Morgan, Devon, RVD, Hulk Hogan, even down to the latest of AJ Styles and Jeff Jarrett TNA founders and originals the list is rather long. Now I fully expect some of these people will be back in TNA at some point. But right now, it seems they are gone. It’s a sweet and sour thing really, people obviously don’t like the idea of certain stars leaving, but let’s be honest, TNA has a Roster far too big for the One-Show a week they run currently anyway. How often do Wrestlers just disappear off of Television for Months and make a “Come-Back” for no reason. Obviously they can only fit in what they book, and what ideas they have in creative going forward.

So really, most of these aren’t a big loss. You can probably make as much arguments for them not being used properly by TNA in the first place, in which case, no big deal really.

I certainly have forgotten most of the people now not with TNA, and Wrestling needs to stay Fresh, you need to mix the old with the new, only hopefully the new are actually good.

But if it saves money and keeps around the guys people want in TNA, then it’s not a bad thing. Every company needs to make cut-backs, and clearly paying guys to sit at home is a bad idea. TNA have been paying their stars to not work for far too long.

The downside to this is that they have brought in new contracts (apparently) which pay their stars per appearance. Now TNA developed this “Live Show” then straight after “Taped Show” deal. Which means the Wrestlers would get paid once for a deal that used to pay them twice. Now with 2013 closing out, and even the first two weeks of 2014, Impact has been Taped 6 weeks in Advance, now theoretically that is one Pay-Packet for 6 weeks worth of work.

I’m fairly sure no-one is badly paid, but it’s certainly a Pay-Cut for stars, and clearly it’s not working out. If the rumours are said to be true, then TNA original AJ Styles never got what he wanted, and the “unhappiness” behind the scenes is what led him to leave TNA.

HOGANBISCHOFF

This all fits in nicely to the departure of Hulk Hogan and Eric Bischoff. It’s just about 4 Years ago when they both officially joined TNA. And it was a good run, but people both fans and Wrestlers alike said from the get-go – Get Rid of Hogan and Bischoff.

It could have been creative differences, it could have been money, but as 2013 ends, it seems clear that both parties have parted ways.

TNA never let Hogan and Bischoff have a huge hand in the Creative side of the Company, though TNA also claimed that they had more sway then they let on. Fact is, Hogan helped build the biggest Professional Wrestling company in the World, he helped put Wrestling on the map for a long-stay Television audience. Eric Bischoff and Hulk Hogan together built the only Wrestling Company in the history of Wrestling to actually Draw bigger ratings and more money than the WWE. But they also had a hand in it falling apart, albeit it a lesser hand. So clearly they would appear valuable to TNA. The problem is, the only sort of “Creative” ideas that come about are the same ones that put WCW on the map back in the mid 1990’s, and that’s the whole invading Faction.

The Immortal Faction was a good idea, and Jeff’s Heel Turn was well done, but, it did suck, let’s be honest. They were a terrible faction. The Aces and Eights was a great idea, with utterly poor execution and in the end a slightly different twist on the idea, that still did nothing really.

Hogan as the General Manager was a bore, it was the same thing every week. He drew big reactions and his name sold their product. But having him in the ring blabbing about and stumbling over his lines was never a good way to start the show. Bischoff I feel would have been a better on-air talent, but he was never seen again since the closing moments of Immortal. As both have gone away, TNA is actually producing some of the best Weekly Shows and ideas they’ve had in a long time, if not ever.

People like to go on about the “Old Days” of TNA, but their Booking was one of the things I always hated. It seemed Dusty Rhodes would just come out and read from a piece of paper for the next PPV with who will be fighting who for what in what match. Most of the time they continued the same matches to the next PPV. It was sloppy and boring and had no structure.

Hogan and Bischoff had a hand in Re-Imagining TNA and Re-Branding it of sorts, and that’s smart. You want to sell your Wrestling Product to any type of Market / Sponsor you give them the biggest name in Wrestling who is an established Star World-Wide and has been for the last 25+ years in Hulk Hogan, and that’s a good sell.

While it’s sad to lose that, Hogan and Bischoff’s pay-checks will open up more possibilities to the guys that really matter, and that’s the Roster.

aceseights

The Aces and Eights were the focus point for a good period of 2012 and the majority of 2013. The fact they were a “Biker Gang” was pathetic. I encourage anyone to work from their influences, no idea is an original idea. But to just say “hey Sons of Anarchy is cool, let’s do that” is stupid. It doesn’t translate to Wrestling, why the hell are they a Biker gang?

They could just create a Faction as they did and leave Bikes out of it, for 18 Months we never saw one of them Ride a Bike. And the only clips we saw of Bikes, had them sitting on them, or some “masked people” riding them, and there was only about 5 clips of those at most. So what was the point? Next time make a plausible faction.

My main gripe with The Aces and Eights was that it suffered from TNA’s “never-ending failure” of bad execution and poor pathetic pay-off.

They had this invading faction that weren’t necessarily Wrestlers who were all masked, sending threats to Hogan and Dixie, jumping Sting, beating up guys and causing chaos. That’s awesome.

Gradually things started to form, and people knew Bully Ray would end up at the head of the Table eventually. The problem though, is I think they changed their minds. If The Aces and Eights was a faction build by say an Eric Bischoff or Jeff Jarrett to try and regain TNA would have been incredible. And everything seemed to be going on that path, then every so often they would just “change it”. Joseph Park’s big exclusive discovery that got smashed on his Laptop and he hit in the head with a Hammer, that went no-where. When Hogan and Sting got kidnapped it was obviously Eric Bischoff in the role of the mysterious leader.

When it was time for Bully to take over, what was left? A faction of guys no-one gave two craps about and Bully Ray as World Champion. The entire development of The Aces and Eights was to put the World Championship on Bully… and that’s it. It ended at Lockdown. Then the faction was Bully Ray with his idiots who tried to keep him in Power. Hogan did nothing which he clearly could have done, and for some reason they were all on the roster. To the point that a few months later they weren’t even a problem anymore and Hogan didn’t seem to care. Even The Main Event Mafia didn’t seem to care. It had no pay-off. It was awesome appeal, great ideas, but poor execution and a pathetic end.

newstars

Speaking of bringing in New Faces, 2013 has ended with a great handful of them.

EC3 though still not really “over” in my eyes, is a great addition. He suits the role of Dixie’s nephew and so far he has managed to establish himself rather well.

On the other hand you have Lei’D Tapa the Gut Check loser who was brought back, that’s a great move. She’s something different but yet again, poor execution to building her character. I love the idea of not bringing in Power-Houses with your typical “Squash-Match” ideas. But to make her impactful for two weeks then a lackey the next, she’s lost all of her momentum and now I don’t care anymore.

Rockstar Spud, someone I wrote off almost instantly, has quickly become one of the best things on TNA Impact every week. Winning the British Boot-Camp was great, he made his debut and then was only seen once since till the end of the year. So I was more than sure he would be getting cut, but what they’ve done with Spud lately has been great work, not to mention he just Shines in the role.

To me though, the best showing of New-Comers has to be Norv Fernam and Dewey Barnes, don’t get me wrong, I don’t really care if they stick around or not. But I do like them. The thing I like the most is that normally when you have a new “Power House” debut you get some local talent who gets his ass kicked in the squash match. Now this is what Norv and Dewey were, till they became regulars. Now to debut these guys against a talent like EC3 actually brings in 3 new stars, establishes them and puts them over all in the same move. It’s clever.

dixieheel

To close out the most important things TNA has done in 2013 though, it has to be Dixie Carter’s Heel Turn.

I think it surprised people, they didn’t expect her to Turn, of all people. Not to mention just how well she fits the role. The thing with Wrestling Management is that it always works best with Heels in Charge. Dixie is the perfect person to gain Heat and draw that rebelliousness out of the Baby Faces. It also creates good Heel Turns in other stars to align themselves with Power.

The problem however lay in the fact that it’s sort of becoming yet another Faction thing. You will have Dixie’s TNA and they who oppose her, most likely the “TNA Originals”.

Either way it has been exciting TV since Dixie turned, her contrast with AJ Styles was great, and more recently Jeff Hardy. The one thing I enjoyed the most was Mr. Andersons brief run-in with the “law” though it ended a week later, it would have been a great contrast also.

It was a smart move Turning Dixie Heel and putting her front and centre each week, and it’s one that has quickly paid off in establishing new talent also. So I for one look forward to see where that all goes in 2014.

Well that was certainly a Long Introduction but now it’s time to get to the Matter at hand and start dishing out the Awards! And yes, the Awards are simply just a Banner I made, but I’m sure they will never see them and if they did, they would be proud!

newcomer nom

I think I pretty much covered the ground with my “New Stars” section above. But 2013 didn’t really see many “New Faces” more like November – December did. Gut-Check was a great new idea put into place last year, though most of the people they gained through that have since been “Released”. So in practice, it was a bad idea. However, TNA have managed to bring in some great new faces this year, and certainly some who I think actually fit into TNA and have the ability to stay around for the long haul.

I put it down to Ethan Carter the Third – Lei’D Tapa and Rockstar Spud because really… who else is there?

Best Newcomer - ROCKSTAR SPUD

But clearly, it has to be Spud who takes the win. EC3 is a great new addition too, but I don’t feel he has found his “place” yet. He’s the typical “new guy” and they’ve not done anything new with him. Nor has he actually had a proper match to see what his in-ring work is like

Lei’D Tapa is a great addition to the Knockouts, but her appeal has quickly been halted by making her Gail’s lackey. I feel they have missed a beat with Tapa, I think there is great potential to re-build it, but not till she is done with Gail. In the long run, it might be best to establish her name whilst being associated with Gail. But time will tell.

Rock Star Spud on the other hand, his gimmick and charisma was fine, but bringing him back as Dixie’s Chief of Staff was the perfect move. He has a great look, his size fits perfectly for people wanting to push him around and dislike him. His attitude and dare I say it “being British” is probably enough to encourage more people to dislike him and want to beat him up and the fact that Dixie won’t be getting thrown around means Spud can take the brunt of her decisions for her.

Spud has been the highlight of the last few shows with a great Backstage Segment with Sting to organising the Thanks Giving Meal (the British way) and Driving to Gainesville Georgia to find AJ Styles. They have been segments I have missed from Wrestling in a long time, and he plays the part perfectly. Mix that with the fact that he can actually Wrestle rather well, I think he will become a Character who you rarely see in the Ring, but will actually surprise those who don’t see him as a Wrestler.

All in all, for his additions to TNA in such a short amount of time, there is no doubt that Spud is the best Newcomer to TNA, and the one to look forward to in 2014.

return nom

Wrestling Fans love a Good “Return”. Whether it’s unexpected or not, people love to see old stars coming back from injuries or storylines. It’s one of the staples of the business and probably the biggest “Pop / Buzz / Ratings” when done correctly.

A few people have “Returned” this year, I mean Sting returns at least 3 times a year. But the most notable ones were Mr. Andersons come back after being beaten down by Bully Ray, Chris Sabin’s triumphant return after 2 years of gruelling rehab and AJ Styles’ long awaited return from his own hiatus.

Best Return - AJ STYLES

I feel sort of Bad for it not going to Sabin. Sort of bad being I don’t feel bad, but in reality he had the truest of Come-Back.

Sabin blew out his knees with the same injury, the second being on his first Return to the ring, so no doubt he had a lot to prove and probably the biggest gut wrenching effort to get out there and carry on. Sabin’s return also saw him Rise to the top with a short World Championship run. So it was a good return on all fronts.

Mr. Anderson on the other hand easily had the weakest, he was written off of TV because his Contract was up, but then came back a couple of Months later. I’m sure this thing has happened in Wrestling for years and years, but with the Internet people know what’s going on behind the scenes a little better. Still, Andersons departure was because he stepped up to fight Bully Ray and paid the price. He still paid the price on his return but he managed to bring down Bully Ray and eventually put an end to The Aces and Eights 18 Months later. So his return was good, but this story is still going into 2014, and I feel we haven’t got to the best part yet.

AJ Styles however for many won the Best Return. AJ’s story has been years in the making, the whole breakdown of Fortune and more battles with Christopher Daniels was the start of this story. The Dixie Carter romance, the infamous Claire Lynch debacle. All of it was to build to AJ’s growing depression and problems with TNA. He would eventually lose the chance to Wrestle for the World Championship for an entire year and losing to Daniels cleanly at the hands of his own Finishing Move is what drove him away. AJ was then “spotted” out and about with this whole Aces and Eights recruiting thing going on, but when AJ came back, he was different. Longer hair, rough looking, new attitude, something completely different to what people know. He was sick of TNA, sick of being the good guy. His return match at Slammiversary against Kurt Angle was great, the second “Evil Ways” played out over the PA was when you knew what AJ had become was something Special. That entrance alone set the stage for the Main Event at Bound for Glory, the clashing of personalities and attitudes both different and similar already set the tone for an inevitable match against Bully Ray. Though AJ fought his way through the Bound for Glory Series, defeated Bully Ray for the World Championship then left TNA because of Dixie Carter all set the stage for the direction of the Company.

Though no-one really knows what is happening with TNA right now, it’s safe to say this AJ Styles storyline and “real life issues” has been the biggest news . rumours in Wrestling for the closing months of 2013, so therefore AJ’s Return was both a huge surprise and a lasting effect.

ppv nom

Obviously it would be a short category if you only chose from the Four actual Pay-Per-Views this year. I simply chose to look at PPV’s as Specials, because that’s how I imagine most Wrestling fans view them.

But seeing that there are now only Four should mean that those four which you paid for, should be the best right?

It wasn’t super easy to narrow down the categories, but I did to what I feel were the best. Lockdown didn’t make the cut because it just wasn’t as good, the Main Event is a huge part in the History of TNA going forward, but the rest of the show was a little sub-par I found. Kurt vs. Wes? Lethal Lockdown? Not even every match was in a Cage which was what the whole selling point of Lockdown originally was.

So in the end it came down to the two you would expect, Slammiversary and Bound for Glory, with a third entry from Turning Point.

PPV of the year - Turning Point

Whilst I’m sure some people might be surprised by what I class as the best Show this year, but try and think what stood out to you the most from Slammiversary and Bound for Glory. It would be the main events… and that’s about it.

Slammiversary sticks in my mind because of Bully vs. Sting, which did make my list of Match of the Year potentials, but that sticks in my mind because it was an emotional match. The same can be said for AJ vs. Bully from BFG, it was a big match, but it’s a Story driven one.BFG wasn’t a “disappointment” per-se, but given it’s supposed to be the biggest show of the year… it didn’t match any type of Hype.

Now the Reason I went with Turning Point is because when I watched Turning Point, and even in my Write-Up I called it the “One to Beat”.

Now this goes into why I love TNA the way I do. It reminds me of the Wrestling I used to love, and when Turning Point kicked off, it did so with a Bang. Bobby Roode jumps James Storm in a Bar, it was an awesome bar-room brawl that hasn’t been seen in ages. I love, love, love backstage segments. And I especially love them when they’re not just the normal “in the back of the Arena” ones. So this was a great impactful way to kick off the show.

Samoa Joe and Magnus, though their match wasn’t great, it started amazingly. Joe pops up on the Titantron and challenged Magnus to the back, and they went at it from the back to the Ring. I love that. It’s exciting, it’s different, unexpected.

James Storm and Bobby Roode’s “Florida Death-match” again, the Match didn’t do much in the way of excitement, but the brawl was great. I loved the spontaneousness of it, I loved what the match was and how it ended.

And of course Andersons struggle to end The Aces and Eights was a true “Turning Point” for TNA going forward. It was a great Main-Event that wasn’t linked to the World Championship.

From Start to Finish Turning Point reminded me of Watching Backlash in 2000, it was Raw, it was Hardcore without being over the top and it was exciting, impromptu, unexpected and actually lived up to its name for setting the Stage for the future of TNA going forward.

knockout nom

The problem with Knockout of the Year is that there really isn’t many. Mickie James makes this list because he heel turn and Championship run in 2013 was great, but she then left, but left after her part played was very meaningful.

ODB has had a great year, since coming back to TNA and hooking up with EY, ODB has never been too far from the Screen, not to mention the Crowd love her.

The worst part is however that Taryn Terrell was on fire, she was poised to be the next big Knockout. She was doing things no-one else has done before and was on the verge of a big push before she left due to her Pregnancy. I’m sure she will be back, but she wasn’t around enough for her to become what she is capable of.

Lei’D Tapa fits in this, but again, not done much, and now thankfully Madison Rayne is back full force. I honestly hope that 2014 is a great year  for the Knockouts, because they struggle to keep it fresh. Which is why, the Knockout of the Year has to be:

Knockout of the year - Gail Kim

Gail Kim is known worldwide as one of if not the best Female Professional Wrestler on the planet. So how can you argue with that? She’s stayed at the top of the Division even when she wasn’t Champion for a brief period.

2013 closed out with her trying to find more competition, and sure this acts as a nice way to bring back Madison, but in reality, it’s true.

There really isn’t anyone left in TNA who is on Gail’s level, and that’s why she is the Knockout of the Year.

tagteam nom

TNA’s Tag-Team Division suffers from the same fate of the Knockouts.

They don’t really have anyone. The Bromans are the first “Team” to be made in TNA in quite some time. Sure Storm and Gunner had a quick run and it was a pretty decent run, but for the first few Months after they won the belts, they weren’t even on Television. And their run acts purely as a way to develop a Storyline, so they’re not even a Team.

Same can be said for Aries and Roode, who as a Team were fantastic, but it was so short lived there’s very little point mentioning it.

The Bromans have been fantastic of late, since Jessie debuted it was obvious he should be with Robbie E and for whatever reason it took them a long time to put them both together. They finally did and at Bound for Glory they really stepped up having one of the best Tag-Team matches of the Year against Storm and Gunner and actually Winning the Tag-Team Championships. It was a rite of passage because till then Robbie E and Jessie have always been the “losers” so for them to actually come across impressive probably seemed out of Character, but they are extremely capable. They might even have swayed my hand if they had been paired with Zema Ion longer. Ion’s addition to The Bromans is the proverbial Peanut Butter and Jelly. Not only does he suit the Broman role brilliantly, but making him a DJ at the foot of the Ring announcing them to the Ring and playing noises over their Matches, it’s a thing of beauty. And something totally new, so they are easily THE Team to watch out for in 2014.

But of course that means the TNA Tag-Team of the Year – 2013 is –

Tag-Team of the year - Bad Influence

How could it not be Bad Influence? They’ve been the best Team in TNA for over 2 years now, that just shows how little TNA actually push Tag-Teams.

But even with a Division full of Teams, Bad Influence would take a lot of effort to dethrone, Daniels and Kazarian together with their own input and creative ideas are unstoppable.

I think their Joseph Park stuff of late has been a little too brutal for them, but their messing around and ideas are a thing of genius. Their EGO Hall of Fame is one of the best Wrestling Segments in a long time, they work flawlessly together and they have branded themselves outside of TNA so well.

The very idea that anyone can match their talent, yet alone be better than it, is just ridiculous. Of course I love Tag-Team Wrestling and I miss Tag-Teams, I loved the Beer Money, Generation Me, Motorcity era of TNA, we need more Teams. So in 2014, that’s something I hope to have.

match nom

This was the Category I struggled on the Most. The rest sort of Answered themselves, or you knew instantly beforehand.

But Match of the Year was a tough one.

I went through Every Match this year and pulled all the ones I thought to be something Special. This resulted in a Collection of 19 Matches which started a whole process of Elimination.

Watching and Re-Watching to find “The One”.

Now I don’t want a Match of the Year to be something grounded by Story Telling. Clearly you can have a Great Match and it can move a Story forward as well as, like Bully vs. Jeff from Lockdown as an example. But when I know I’ve watched a good match is when you “feel” it. It takes you by surprise, it draws you in, it makes you excited, it actually throws you off who is going to win.

That’s the beauty of Wrestling that nothing else on this planet can deliver. It really is the strangest mix of media, but when it’s done right, it’s perfect. That’s what I wanted.

Those 19 Matches then came down to 9 Matches that moved forward. Those 9 then turned into 7 and bit by bit I pulled it down to Three, and it was no easy task. Two of the Matches stuck in my head from the first time I watched them, and one of them was something I had to Re-Watch to get the beauty from. In the end it came down to Bobby Roode vs. Austin Aries from Destination X 2013 – Austin Aries vs. Sting from Impact 14/3/13 and Manik vs. Chris Sabin vs. Austin Aries from Impact 4/7/13

AriesvsSting

Even when I was rolling out the “Nominees” Banners I still hadn’t decided which Match to go with. But in the end, I went with what I always wanted to be The Match of the Year.

Bobby Roode and Austin Aries have been tearing it up for over a Year now, and they’ve gotten pretty good at working together with it. Either as a Team (Dirty Heels) or against each other. It’s no secret I love Austin Aries’ work, he’s truly the best in TNA, hands down. Any match he is in, you’re in for a treat. Which is why last year when Aries actually faced Roode for the World Championship, I actually didn’t care for that match so much. I got why it was great. But Aries and Bully and Aries and Joe stood out to me far greater than Aries and Roode.

So fast forward a Year and Aries and Roode go at it again at Destination-X and its Perfection. It’s hard hitting, fast-paced and point for point perfect. Not to mention Aries’ suicide Dive through the Ropes which took Roode onto the Steel Steps was something I’ve never seen before.

Manik vs. Chris Sabin vs. Austin Aries was the one that stuck in my head since I first Watched it. Sure Manik was taken out leaving Aries and Sabin to work it alone, and that created a great match. In the midst of Aries dressing up as Manik to win back the X-Division Championship, and Sabin’s quest for the Main Event at Destination-X it was a mix up of goals. But Manik impressed from the get-go as always, a true great addition to TNA, which is weird because he’s a Newcomer and also not. But Sabin and Aries fought it out beautifully, counters and kick-outs galore till in the end Sabin’s “All Hail Sabin” from the Top-Rope was enough to finally put away Austin Aries.

But Aries vs. Sting, there’s just something about it. I hate that it doesn’t have a Winner, as The Aces and Eights break it up. But Aries vs. Roode, we’ve seen many times. Aries / Manik / Sabin we’ve seen many times. But Aries vs. Sting has happened Once, and that’s it. Aries has stated since he wants to mix it up again with the Icon, and that is actually my most anticipated match should it ever see the light of day once more.

For me Aries vs. Sting has an awesome crowd, from the Get-Go it’s special. Roode and Aries enter to a great reaction, and Sting who returns to Chicago the home of some of his biggest matches in his Career and the Reaction is amazing. The thing I love most about it is that obviously Sting can still get it done, but he Wrestlers so much differently now. I wouldn’t say people let him off lightly, but he never seems to take much onslaught. Austin Aries has the ability many Wrestlers strive for, Anyone he Wrestlers with, is an amazing Match, Aries can raise the game of anyone, and does so, every time. Sting is no different, Sting is on fire in a way you rarely see, and Aries doesn’t hold back, he goes at Sting full-force like he would with anyone. Mix that with the Amazing Crowd, the fact they’ve never fought before or since, and you have a Match that stands on its own, completely unique, and utterly entertaining.

That’s why Austin Aries vs. Sting is different, exciting, and quite clearly – The Match of the Year.

wrestler of the year nom

I’m sure some people would like to make a play for AJ Styles in this category, but he isn’t in it because he’s not even been on Television for the Majority of 2013. Nor has he had 5Star Matches, he has had great Storyline Matches though.

Bully Ray falls into this Category because he controlled the Spotlight for the majority of 2013, on his rise to the World Championship to the entire Aces and Eights run, Bully commands the structure of the show as it’s best Heel and one of the best performers in the ring from a physical Wrestling standpoint, to a Storytelling wrestling standpoint.

It has been a long time coming for Bully to be a World Champion, and while I actually think he as President of The Aces and Eights isn’t as strong as him just being Bully Ray a Heel, this has easily been the year of Bully Ray.

Jeff Hardy on the other hand is someone I didn’t actually expect to put in this category. Hardy won the fans vote for Wrestler of the Year last year in TNA itself, but he’s popular, so that’s why. Since Jeff has been back, he’s been excellent. Even his mic skills have seen a little improvement on the odd occasion this year. Jeff’s in ring work has been some of the best Matches he’s ever done. Jeff’s normally remembered for being Crazy and not actually for a “Wrestling” point of view. But Jeff actually had 5 possible Match of the Year candidates this year. He always steals the spotlight in the ring and his work has been getting stronger and stronger. For Jeff to be where he is in his Career, it’s truly exceptional for him to continue to excel at this stage. He’s always been a fan-favourite and in 2012 he proved himself, and in 2013 he not cemented his statement but exceeded his potential and value to the industry.

With that being said, it’s quite obvious who takes the Title of the Wrestler of the Year:

Wrestler of the Year - Aries

How could it not be Aries? You want great Wrestling, you look to the best Wrestler there is, and that’s Austin Aries. He has a great character, great mic skills, great storytelling ability and he is the best in the Ring. Period.

Out of those 19 Matches I considered for Match of the Year – Aries was in 9 of them. As my process of elimination grew narrower guess who ended up in every single Match of the Year Nominee – Austin Aries. I believe that is called a “Common Denominator” and Aries is the Common Denominator of Greatness. For the second year in a Row no-one has put on better Matches than Austin Aries. And when AJ and Aries clashed this year, Aries even said it, AJ “Was” the face of TNA for great matches and must see talent, today, that’s Austin Aries.

His ability is exceptional and something truly unique, plenty of people in the business like to brag about how good they are, but no-one is actually as good as Austin Aries, and that’s why he is The Wrestler of the Year.

It has been a Great year for TNA and clearly they have had a lot of problems as always and maybe even more plaguing them today in the early stages of 2014. Whatever happens, their Product has been incredible and their addition to Wrestling History cannot be over-looked.

Here’s hoping they can execute great idea with great pay-offs this year, and that they really pad out and spend time developing their fantastic Divisions – X-Division – Knockouts and Tag-Team especially.

But in the closing segments, just as it was last year, 2013 is the year of Austin Aries.

Dan Wilkinson

www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

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The Jobber Blogger #83 – TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 26/12/13

December 30, 2013 by DiVineDiablo

Jobber Blogger New Year

Well it’s not Christmas Eve anymore, but then it’s not the New Year yet also, so it’s time to end the year with a bang! Least, from my perspective currently whilst Writing this blog, I hope it ends with a Bang. Not like my computer blows up, or someone knocks on the door or something, more like I hope this is a good one!

It’s been an Amazing Year folks, and thanks go out to all of those whom have Read my many ramblings in my first full year of doing this. It has flown by to be honest, and for anyone who wants to get into Writing and keeping up to date, then telling yourself you’re going to Cover a Weekly show is the way to do it. They provide the material, you sit back and make fun, and huzah! Let your Three Readers at best roll in to witness it all.

Well it’s soon to be a New Year, and like everyone, The Jobber Blogger hopes it brings new heights! And with certain plans in my pockets, who knows what might happen! Of course, until then, it’s time to do this for the consecutive Eighty Third time!

Impact Wrestling Logo

 TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 26/12/13

I suppose before we kick it into “Covering the Show” let’s plug Total Nonstop Rewind’s / Jobber Blogger presented – “Best of 2013”. Each day for the next week a new Category will go up on www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind where you can view, comment and vote on your favourites from the chosen Nominees. So go get yourself over there now!

newcomer nom

Speaking of best new comers, Nominee 2013: Rockstar Spud kicked off Impact this week, with new Entrance theme… even less Rockstar than before. I think it’s time for a name change. Spud as a name is something I despise, I knew a guy named Spud.. so it’s degraded because of that, my other half knew a different guy named Spud, a girl I went to Uni with got nicknamed Spud, so yeah, I despise the name a little. But you know what, Rockstar Spud has a lot of qualities to best resemble “Spud”. I once created a Wrestler back in the old “Smackdown” games called “Neon”. He was a “Edge” inspired guy, mixed with GTA: Vice City, which the Magazine spread I was reading had a whole article on how the 80’s Neon Glow of the City set the stage and tone of the Game. So then Neon was born, and he was kinda crappy. I liked the idea, but he needed a make-over, so he became Neon Red, and Dark Neon, etc, each persona carried his abilities and general theme, but over time his look and attitude changed (as it so does in Wrestling) and his name was versatile enough to make the transition with him. He then became “Devil Neon” to team with my top CAW – Wild Thing and they sported similar looks. Till of course, inevitably they broke up as a Team and were forced to battle each other over who keeps the image. Wild Thing won, being the original (though it literally could have gone either way) so poor Neon had to once again go under a new style, and lose the one gimmick that brought him success. And so he became Poisneon a mix on neon and poison, and re-branded himself ala Sting. A look which proved very successful.

Okay, so I shall stop talking about the insane amount of Hours I spent on my own Make Believe Wrestling Federation, where I filled every single available Create-A-Wrestler slot, and spent so many hours planning storylines and what not. My Nerdiness runs much, much deeper into my history of “Wrestling Federations”, I had Draws and Draws full of Wrestling Figures, and I used to plan out my Storylines “years” in advance, (a month was like a Week to me, so I get through a year pretty quickly). I then used to plan out RAW and SmackDown with matches, and interview slots, all of it to make sense for the right title changes and storyline development. I had many Note-Books full of PPV’s then when it got to the PPV, I used to set up my Tape-Recorder and do running commentary on it. I had a pile of CD’s on my left with my CD Player, I knew every track for which Theme, I knew every last Second of the Songs for the Right Entrance Music to the perfect “Winning Theme” point in the song. I had a load of Tissue Paper to elastic band round my desk light to create the right lighting for the Wrestlers. I had rolls and rolls of PVC tape I used to customise my figures for the right Wrist Tape and new Ring-Gear. I even made (with help) real fabric T-shirts for when I pushed my low-card guys to the Main Events. I had loads of elastic to make new and nifty Ring-Ropes, and I had loads of blocks of Polystyrene to create these huge (one of a kind) Stages for my PPV’s every Month. Well, top that off with my Video Game (CAWs) and eFed’s, then I think you get a pretty good idea of how Wrestling obsessed I was.

My figure Storylines peaked when I “retired / fired / quit” some of the guys from the WWE, and I had customised many of my old Figures to match the TNA guys, because back then Jaxxs made the WWE figures, and Matel I believe did the TNA ones (like the old WCW ones) so they did not match in size. So I customised the likes of Abyss, AJ Styles, Raven, Ron Killings, BG James, I retired Jeff Hardy, bought a new DDP, everything was getting ready for this big TNA Invasion and then I grew up. Change that with (I didn’t want to be embarrassed) and you have the real answer. So my TNA love goes back many, many years too. I really should get a job in the Wrestling Industry.

 

So anyway Rockstar Spud kicked off Impact this week with new music, how the hell did I get on that rant? Oh yes, name change. Spud suits him, Rockstar not so much anymore. I think if he went through “Changes / Gimmicks” Spud can stay intact, and he go back to being a Rockstar, and he can be Chief Spud, or something like that. It’s a Mick Foley esk character change, that works amazingly well. Mick himself put it best when he reverted back to Cactus Jack in time for his infamous Street Fight with HHH nearly 14 years ago!!!!! o.O

He went from Mankind to being Cactus Jack, and all he really did was “take off his shirt” but it’s the legacy and mind set he established with each gimmick that made him a New Character, and that Character was capable of different things. It’s an awesome idea that has only ever been done with Mick in Wrestling to any success. Not that Spud is the right guy for it, but that idea could certainly carry.

Spud was out to introduce the “Woman Responsible for everything” who is the equivalent of “Lady Gaga, Santa Clause and Queen Elizabeth” rolled into one. Which is strange, because Dixie Carter came out, and I was expecting someone more like

Queen Lady Santa

The running Gag being that Dixie had this big “Announcement” or in reality (a desperate struggle for Ratings) but before she could announce it, Jeff Hardy headed to the ring.

Jeff didn’t really have much to say, just going on about how he doesn’t care about Dixie, and Dixie’s “Champion” and blabbing on endlessly about being sick of everything. Spud however got in the face of Hardy, which is the more noteworthy part of Hardy’s involvement, noteworthy more so because I wrote it down in my notes. Still, Hardy throttled and threatened Spud, which is when EC3 attacked Hardy.

Dixie then went to finally make her announcement when Sting got involved. Sting’s whole point was that he is also “Sick and tired of these entitled punks” and demanded a match against them.

Which is where Dixie rejected the match, then made the match, and took credit for it. So that’s cool. The match being Sting and Hardy against Spud and EC3.

Gunner was then next in line to disrupt Dixie, wanting to Cash-In his World Title Shot against Magnus, but alas, Magnus was “abroad celebrating”.

And then Storm got involved stating Gunner owed him and wanted a Match for the Briefcase.

Storm is now getting more paranoid that Gunner was the one who tipped off Bobby Roode that he was in that Bar, and led to Storm getting beaten down, then got his ass kicked in the match with Roode, till Gunner “threw in the towel” Either way, Dixie agreed to letting Storm and Gunner fight it out for the Briefcase, and that being punishment for Gunner interrupting her, and therefore she isn’t going to make the announcement till later on in the show.

James Storm vs. Gunner – World Heavyweight Championship Shot – Briefcase

What do you call this Stipulation?

Anyway, the opening of Impact was actually pretty good, I liked the chaotic-ness of it all. Sure it was a tad anti-climatic but it worked well.

I was just about to get into this match, after noting Gunner is wearing is Iron Maiden attire again. Till of course, Tragedy struck.

I went to get comfy and inadvertently kicked my empty bowl of Noodles sending a stream of “Noodle Juice” across my carpet. The whole was like a horrible flash back to I believe Undertaker vs. Mark Henry many years ago on Smackdown (soon after he reverted back to the Deadman).I ran down in the commercial break to get a glass of milk and dropped the Milk… I have never, ever, seen anything like the mess it made. I literally covered every single Kitchen Cupboard in Milk. I just looked around with dripping Milk everywhere. The whole floor…. MILK! It’s safe to say I missed the match cleaning it up.

Least this time round I just pressed Pause, and cleaned the Carpet. But while I was at it, I figured I might as well get another Mug of Tea. Now I have this HUGE Mug, and trying to stir my boiling hot tea proved to be just as problematic. For I ended up dropping the Tea-Spoon into my mug, so to stir it, I needed the spoon, to get the Spoon I had to stick my fingers in boiling hot tea. Of course the Spoon is Metal, so even when I got the Spoon, it was boiling hot and I dropped it back in the Tea,…. many, many times. Sure I could have got another Spoon, or used a cloth or something. But you know what, screw it! I was determined to do it, and suffer! God Damn You Noodle Juice!

I since learnt you say that 3 Times in a Mirror and nothing happens. Maybe.

Noodle Juice

In the end though, Gunner Speared Storm through the ropes, and right then you could see how it was going to end. But alas, Storm bounced Gunner’s head into the Steel Steps when Hebner counted them both out. Funny how normally they do it so everyone pays attention, but when they want people to get counted out, they do it as quietly as possible. Still, it didn’t end there as Storm and Gunner carried on beating each other up.

But I don’t know if that’s such a good match for Storm, as Taz quite clearly said, Gunner is built like a “Brick Sh*t House”…. now that’s a Lego Set kids wouldn’t want for Christmas.

Brick House

Brooke and Bully shared a nice little segment, which might actually have been my favourite from this week’s show. It started with Brooke approaching Bully backstage and claiming to have not heard from him in weeks, and “Who is this?” she asks about his current persona. She then threatens to tell the World all his little secrets, to which he says “that’s not a good idea”.

But she goes to the ring anyway, she is now a “bimbo” or at best I could gather by her current gimmick. She’s always been a weird mix of awesome and slutty. And funny enough depending on where you stand on those boundaries, you will either find her entirely awesome or entirely slutty. Still, with new music she has ditched the “Don’t Mess with Tess” and become this more “biker ish, sort of, groupie”. But, I quite like it.

I think now is the perfect time for her to ditch the “Tessmacher” it’s been gone since she just became “Brooke” with The Aces and Eights, but just let her be Brooke Adams, it’s a good name.

Still, she refused to be held accountable for the demise of The Aces and Eights, even though she threw the Hammer, which Anderson caught and that led to his Victory, all of it was Bully’s plan, it just didn’t “go to plan”.

Bully then came out, with his 2003 Undertaker look

2003 taker

Bully quickly went from the Clay Morrow running the Club (minus the awesome ideas and great planning) and quickly has become the Clay Morrow with no club mooching around doing nothing.

Brooke encourages Bully to “Tell the Truth” which, who knows what that is. But what’s actually rather awesome is when Brooke shed light on the fact that she has watched him “Destroy and lose everything”. Bully is left with no Heavyweight Championship, no Club, no Brother, no Family, and that’s actually yet another really cool Character Development. Even if it is a little bit “AJ Styles”.

The fact she compared Bully to a “Weird High-School Kid with no Friends” is what topped the Segment for me. Now there’s a good Wrestling Gimmick they haven’t fully explored.

Bully then of course stole the segment by saying he doesn’t blame Brooke because “you’re not much in the Brains Department” “Kept you around for other uses, but you weren’t much good at those either”. The little “sometimes when we were together I used to picture Brooke number one” was an excellent cheap shot. Though Bully has one final use for Brooke, and that’s to spread his word.

Which is when the Segment got really good, and weird, and kinda cheesy as they played this ominous dark tone whilst Bully spoke about how “Evil” and “Sinister” he is, and that it’s only going to get “A lot Worse”.

So whatever they are building to with Bully should be awesome, no doubt going in a more Hardcore Direction, which seems fitting. Perhaps Tommy Dreamer plays into that with their match coming up soon on TNA’s One Night Only PPV.

Joseph Park vs. Bad Influence – Monsters Ball Match

If I can find it, I shall embed the Awesome Video Package they ran before this match. It was a great look at the whole Joseph Park / Abyss storyline, but it’s certainly running dry, which is why I fear they have just kicked it into over-drive to get it done with. Of course the bad side of that is I don’t think it will have reached its potential. Which is TNA’s greatest quote “It’s good… never reaches its Potential though”.

I’ve been saying it for years, TNA have great ideas and terrible execution with an even worse pay off.

EY got Park to enter with Abyss’ music, but they kept Joseph Park’s video. So that made a whole deal of sense.

Park kept Janice close, till of course Bad Influence knocked her out of Park’s hands, which is when they just beat him down for the majority of the match.

Speaking of beating things down, or even beating things in. Here’s a good plug for IGN’s Let’s Play with Christopher Daniels!…. yep, the whole wording of Beating, and then a title of “Let’s Play with Christopher Daniels” certainly paints a rather bleak image in one’s head.

IGN – Christopher Daniels – Let’s Play

Kaz was about to smash Park over the head with a Steel Chair till Daniels stopped him, so they didn’t make Park bleed, hence not bringing out his “Abyss mode”, strange how they’ve only just come to this conclusion a year later, and only because Eric Young pointed it out.

It was all a little odd, it mixed humour with this weird type of horror story thing. Obviously in the end Park tried to run away from Kaz and Daniels who were just beating him down till Eric Young came out to encourage Park. Though EY’s best efforts of “making him bleed” didn’t work out, in the end Kaz swung the Kendo stick which EY dodged and it busted Park open badly, sending him into Abyss mode.

Park then won the match with Blood everywhere and picked up Janice. So I don’t know if that means he is Abyss, or he has found Abyss or what. It didn’t involved barbed wire or thumb tacks, it didn’t really do a lot.

The thing is, if Park is only sent into this “Abyss” mode by seeing his own blood, why would you want to revert him back? Also if you want it to be a permanent thing, how is that going to work. Personally I think EY should just hit him over the head with different things to see which worked till it did. Though a weird mash up of a crazy Joseph Park with Abyss would be good. If the whole experiment went in a complete different direction and they made a hybrid, unstable, monster that tore through everything and everyone. That would be cool. I should write this show, I’ve got years of experience with Toys.

Lei’D Tapa (w/Gail Kim) vs. ODB

Gone are the days of “The Unstoppable Force meets The Immovable Object”  like the great Hogan / Andre battle. Nope, Taz summed this one up as “King Kong vs. OctoPussy” so that says a lot.

kong octopus

Before I go off into a semi-rant, let’s cut to the finish, Gail Kim slid the Knockouts Championship in the ring, which distracted the Ref, so when ODB picked up Lei’D Tapa to slam her, Gail pulled ODB’s hair and Tapa fell on top of her and got the victory.

I put “Weak” and underlined it twice.

Now what I mean by that, is Lei’D Tapa is built like a Female Wrestler we haven’t seen before. Sure we’ve had our Chyna’s and Awesome Kong’s and I’m sure there are similar Wrestlers like Tapa out in the indies. But on Television, Lei’D Tapa is “SOMETHING DIFFERENT”. For my money she’s better than Kong, she is built like the perfect giant, Amazon type. The way Matt Morgan was a giant built like a perfect Man, Tapa is the exact right proportion she should be, she’s just really Big. Now that makes her an attraction.

When she debuted she started by taking out all of the Knockouts with ease, now that was awesome. Then they made her Gail’s lackey and she’s been rather terrible ever since. Sure she would just be a Female in Squash matches, but the fact that Gail needed to help Tapa win? Now that makes her look incredibly Weak. The fact Madison Rayne beat Gail Kim last week, what the hell does that do for Lei’D Tapa.

You are going to have to flick a switch to be able to build her into what she is naturally built as. To say this was THE meeting between both Tapa and ODB it was forgettable. They should have devoted time to build it as a feud, to actually have suspense around their encounter. They missed every opportunity and in the process just flat lined Tapa’s potential.

During the show we had a “Rise of Magnus” video package that was Magnus talking about his journey to where he is now. It was one of those weird “Shoot / Work” videos, where he had genuine gripes of is shaky start and years spent to get somewhere. Mixed with the Work angel of his new Heel persona and cashing in on that opportunity to become the World Champion. With Magnus set to appear next week on Impact, I personally want to see him be full out Heel, new Music, new look, new attitude. I half suspect he will be, but time will tell.

Jeff Hardy and Sting vs. Ethan Carter the Third and Rockstar Spud and The Bromans (w/Zema Ion)

No you didn’t read that wrong, and yes you probably already watched the Show. Dixie finally made her announcement which if that got people to stay tuned to Impact and didn’t want to, then no, it was not worth their time. She purely said Magnus will be here next week. And then announced that The Bromans will be teaming with EC3 and Spud in this Handicap match.

Throughout the night Jeff has been a little off, Sting was trying to get him fired up, but Jeff didn’t seem to be biting. Then we saw him on the phone with his Wife Beth where he said “I need to do this”.

Anyway, Jeff hit a Senton Dive over the Ropes to take out everyone, so it made up for it. Also have I mentioned how good The Bromans are now that Zema is with them. I miss his DJ Desk, the idea of him making stupid noises and shouting out over the match is a highlight I want to see every week.

I guess the main story is that EC3 avoided fighting Sting, Spud avoided doing anything, which they are building this thing about Spud not actually being a capable Wrestler. Which I like, the work they’ve done with Spud in a matter of weeks has really paid off. He is perfect for this Role, and to have him seem like the “incapable” Wrestler is perfect. I never knew Steven Richards could Wrestle, I didn’t know that at all when Right to Censor first came on the scene. So to some, they won’t know anything about Spud, though Spud was Wrestling with the TNA guys 8 years ago in the UK, he’s been on the circuit a long time.

In the end though, Sting was cleaning house when EC3 caught him in a Roll Up from Behind and got the win. Which of course just annoyed Sting further, though with EC3 having a World Tag-Team Title Shot, I guess it’s quite obvious that Spud could indeed be his Partner. What is more interesting though is that they are friends with the Bromans, the Champions, so how they will resolve that issue will be interesting. It could be to turn Bromans Face if they refuse to “lose” to Dixie’s “boys”.

And then the show ended with Jeff apologising to Sting for last week, and for tonight. And did his really awkward screaming “I’m not buying into a single word your saying” speech where he said Dixie is driving him crazy (funny, because he went to meet with her two weeks ago, and clearly didn’t realise she was different then). He said he wants to Fight, but has no Fight left, and that he has Wrestled his Last Match for TNA – and then regrettably added “Until the Sun Shines on this Great Kingdom Once More!”. So much for going out with your head held high, just ruined a good speech.

Either way, this is the news that got people in a huff on the Internet about Jeff leaving TNA. The very idea someone in that crowd witnessed that Speech and thought he was actually leaving and it wasn’t storyline, just Baffles my mind. It is quite obviously Storyline and Jeff will be back at some point. Probably with AJ Styles, Chavo Guerrero, Sting maybe and Jeff Jarrett.

As they assemble to battle Dixie’s Power Trip. Hell, Hogan might even show up… hopefully not though, I don’t really miss him.

Here is my problem  though, sure this whole TNA Originals vs. Dixie Carter Power Trip thing is an awesome idea. Though it is still an invading Faction esk Idea. The bigger problem comes with the fact that having The Good Guys run the show is not anyway near as good as having the Bad Guys run the show. Dixie’s Heel Run has been some of the best work TNA has done, period. She is a great catalyst for everyone else to work off from, the friction between her and AJ was great. When Anderson came back and she was getting him arrested was awesome, shame that has died down. Hogan in charge was a little bit of a bore, so was Sting. So this is great currently. And she has EC3 and Spud who can take an Ass Kicking for her.

Still, whatever that are working towards excites me! And it should excite you too!

See you all in the New Year!

Till Then,

Dan Wilkinson

www.facebook.com/TotalNonstopRewind

TNR Cover 12

http://www.striketapandgrapple.com

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