REQUEST TO JOIN – DON’T BE A POTATO! DON’T BE A TRAGEDY like…Post Malone! I don’t rock his music! That’s why The Undertaker chokeslammed his blodclart!
I can see you idiots like – ‘American Bad Ass’ confirmed! YOU FOOL!
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RAW 1308! BOOKER-T IS MY NEW HERO!
Remember – I’m going by what YouTube tells me… so let’s get into it!
All Brock has to do is show up… the moment he does…. BRAUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!! But Brock ain’t afraid of anybody… is he???
Kevin Owens wants to offer congratulations! He has no choice – he can’t manage Braun! Not many can!
“At WrestleMania, when you needed a tag partner, you had to go in the crowd, and pick a 10-year-old kid…” Er Kevin… that was the point! Braun was saying he didn’t need anybody! And that’s the truth!
What is Kevin Owens up to??!!! I cannot figure it out right now!
Looks like Kevin sealed the deal! he doesn’t wanna get brukk up anymore! You think this will save him?
Strowman was gonna drop Owens with that powerslam! But Owens get life!!!
Has Jinder Mahal.. JINDER MAHAL!! Found tranquility? Inner Peace? Seems so… he defeated Chad Gable (poor soul) and felt enlightenment!
Has the B-Team become woken?? Nice touch by Bo Dallas pretending to be Wyatt… GEDDIT?
Wow! You mean Elias is actually gonna sing a full song without getting interrupted?
Dayuuum nuff WWE Superstars got that sellotape on em right? Sheeeeeeeeet WTF they be doin? Cesaro set the trend and everybody follow fashion!
Oh dear… Sasha & Bayley have started their sh!t again… these two just need some good ol’ scissor action! Either that or the tongue!
Double R could have waited until Kurt Angle addressed the Brock Lesnar situation! But wait! He’s not a good guy or a bad guy is he? He does what he wants when he wants! Sounds like somebody else we all love and adore! But that’s none of my business…
Uh-oh! Bobby Lashley is chiming in! Now this is good!!! Peeople do wanna see Lashley and Brock clash! My thing is… Braun has the briefcase… so it’s like… that black champion dream could be derailed…
So this is how it’s going! Kurt is gonna announce a multi person match for Extreme Rules… winner fights Brock at the Summerslams… as much as I want it to be Lashley… Braun has the briefcase… now – I’m all for Braun being champion… but I’d rather him cash it on anyone BUT Lashley you feel me?
Now, by doing the knowledge, those multi people could be Elias, Seth Rollins and Finn Balor… Finn NEVER lost the title. Elias just sung a song about Brock… and Seth… well I’ll get to him later!
Meanwhile The Revival are about to get dissed again as they go up against Bobby Lashley and Double R! This is not right WWE!!! The Revival is a wicked team! Why You Do This?
Check it – Lashley hit the Revival with a spear – BLAOW! That’s Double R’s super move! Well true say Lashley did it from marnin though…
Now remember why I said Seth Rollins gonna be in that match? Here’s why – he just lost his intercontinental title to a pink leggings wearing Dolph Ziggler! He can invoke his rematch clause all he wants – Drew Wackintyre will be there as well…
So essentially, Baron Corbin is the new ‘Corporate Kane’…. by that I mean – he now wrestles in his shirt and trousers! And he won as well against Finn Balor! HOLY SMOKES!
So we come to the real issue at hand… Alexa Blitch… look at her talking down to Ronda Rousey! Y’all wonder why I can’t stand Alexa! Said it before I’ll say it again – I’d get my sister to f**k her up!
This is the Ronda Rousey I like! That chick who gets bex! She just gone GHETTO GYAL on Alexa! And she attacked Kurrrrrrrrrrrrrt! OH MY GOD NOT KUUUUUUUUUUUUUURT!!
Ronda Rousey – powerbombed Alexa Blitch through the table – BLAOW!!!
Oh dear, Kurt just suspended Ronda! But in 30 days… Alexa goose COOK!!! I think we are seeing the Summerslam storyline! Ronda has gone to hone her skills! My dream came true once already when Naomi whupped Alexa’s @$$… but this time Ronda can do it! KILL THE B!TCH!
The Best There Is, The Best There Was, and The Best That Ever Will Be has been diagnosed with prostate cancer. The GRANT SAYS WWE has a lot to answer for. WHY? Because every year, they represent the Susan Komen thing, and that’s about breast cancer, they support the Connor’s cure, but they never support the prostate cancer… borderline discrimination don’t you think?
On a serious note, Bret has fought many battles in his time. Now it’s time for Bret to fight his biggest challenge in his life. Last week the RePPiN4U Show did a F**k Cancer special… and recently, they snatched Terry Wogan. THAT’S F**KED UP. F**K CANCER!!!
RAW #1184! I am the Infamous Informer, I’m a student of this wrestling sh!t, and Black History, I ain’t passed the bar but I know a little bit!
The WrestleMania 32 sign emblazoned high.. LET’S START THIS SH!T! WITH BRRRROCCCCK, LESSSSNARRRR! the Mayor of Suplexxxx Cittttty!!!
See the crowd chanting for it, so you IWC minorities shut the f**k up! If the fans chant for it, it’s gonna keep going!
Aaah sh!t – Triple TEEF is now the Billion Dollar trophy husband!!! I like that sh!t! Ambrose has heard enough though… they say mad men have the strength of 10 men… so suplex city for Deano may not be enough to put him down!
Deano just told Brock to take him to Suplex City! He can’t do that!!! He really is a mad man! This dude dun broke the streak – Deano just told Brock to his face he ain’t scared of him! WHOA!
Again the FastLane theme is wack… I gotta fix that! Wait Lillian is speaking in Spanish introducing Kalisto… suddenly I feel powerful in my jeans…
GRANT BODY -P!
Say whaaaaat? Kalisto fights Bertie AGAIN at the FastLane? I thought Bertie was injured! Are you wrestling jabronies reading dirt sheets again?
Now the League of Nations have become the League of casualties… Lana is at ringside once again… that’s GOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!
Damn Kalisto twisted up Rusev all over that ring until Rusev realised he was out of the ring and then the ref counted to 10! Remember back in the days? when Lana would use her iron (masturbating) fist and say RUSEV CRUSH??? And the opponent was finished??!
NO GRANT YOU DIDN’T JUST SAY THAT!
Stephanie is just so flirtatious!!! Does she realise that when she’s talking to Reigns & Ambrose, or whenever she’s on screen? She just oozes sexuality!
Two women who don’t ooze as much sexuality are Brie & Charlotte, who’s causing a little bit of trouble being unapologetic to Brie as the cause of Nikki’s injury… but that’s not the issue – LOOK AT RIC FLAIR Looking at Renee Young up and down… and RIGHTFULLY SO!
WORD!!!! The Usos are ‘GRAMMY AWARD’ winners??? WHOA!!! And Straight Outta Compton won NO AWARDS??? This is a travesty! Shout out to Lillian for the botch! She can botch and still look sexy doing it!
Time to finally clarify things… DMX DID NOT DO AJ STYLES THEME… this jabroni did… it’s kinda catchy actually…
Damn Miz you are doing some serious d!ck riding aren’t you?
YOU WHAT???!!!!! Miz calls himself the father of the Yes movement??? DISRESPECT! AJ Styles is listening to The Miz talk sh!t, AJ Styles is one of the best wrestlers that ever did it! Yo Styles – give this muthaf***a a StylesClash super move!
That’s it Styles – BEAT OUT HIS BLODCLART!
Styles needs to teach some of these WWE superstars a lesson – just because you were in TNA or NJPW or ROH or wherever – DOES NOT MEAN you are inferior than them! The ignorance level is over 9000!
If WWE are celebrating Black History Month, then THE GRANT SAYS they should at least give Alicia Fox or (preferably) Naomi a title shot at Charlotte! But if that Ric Flair took a shot at Naomi.. who would get to Flair first to brukk him up… Uso… or me????
With that said.. I want Ric Flair to plant one on Brie’s lips… it would be great! Anyone but Naomi!
Plant one on Alicia! DO IT FLAIR! Hold up – Brie defeated Charlotte??? OH SNAP!
Big Show Vs The Wyatt bwoy… I mean… Erick Rowan gonna get punched through schoolbuses right? The Wyatts are usually teef… maybe I should hang around and watch this… but to be honest… I wanna sandwich and a mocha coffee… you want me to get anything for you? No? Ok more for me!
Haha! That Triple Teef! Insinuating that Suplex City gone SAWFT like the NXT tag team!
Brock should have said ‘did you polish the hammer like that chick in the music video?’
PG GRANT – SH!T!
Right you see this triple threat match at Fast Lane… The Grant says this – to those who wanna see Triple vs Deano at WrestleMania… considering everything you have seen over the last two months, ask yourself – DOES THAT MATCH MAKE SENSE???
Answers on a postcard pleae – tweet me @MZATheInfamous!
Wait a minute – Didn’t I see this match last week? Well I’m not gonna talk about Kevin Owens Vs Ziggler again f**k that! Just for no reason – here’s a pic of that chick from Lucha Underground – GOD DAYUUUUUUUM!!! She’s my type… OHHHHHHHHH!!!
Look at her…. OHHHHHH! (Shaking my head and screwing my face as I type this)
BIG RESPECT TO WWE for that Mark Henry tribute. I like the fact that they hinted on inducting him in the Hall Of Fame at some point as well.
THATS WHAT I DO!!!
I respect that you’re out for dolo Sasha… but a few weeks ago you was all about UNITY! Now look what you’ve done!
Well Naomi & Tamina are just making sure that is the case…the UNITY is still there… I hope!
But lets take a moment to look at my Naomi! Those blue highlights in her hair… OHHHHH! I hope Uso taps dat @$$ later… she really was the wife who got away… I could shed a tear seriously… I just know my moms would be so proud – by the way – she asked me the other day if ‘Tiffany’ is my type… she’s this woman on Big Brother. I don’t know who she is… but HELL YEAH!
Answers on a postcard please – who is she? Tweet me – @MZATheInfamous! I’d tear her @$$ up!!! If she doesn’t tear me up first!
Oh no they turned on Sasha… ahhh man… I guess it was coming really…
But on my WWE2K16… they stick tog…. wait there… I haven’t got Sasha on WWE2K16! I think I got Layla in there instead!
First Naomi is taking shots, now The New Day taking shots at Kanye West! Dude got fingered in his @$$ by Amber Rose – that is NOT COOL! And it’s the truth! Look how fine Amber Rose is… and the bwoy let the girl do nasty things to his doodoo bottom… SHAME…
Interesting how The New Day pointed out the kid in the crowd with the Bullet Club shirt on… camera focussed more than once… I’m saying HMMMMM!!!
Damn the Shield days were a long time ago right? Back in the days The Shield’s opponents had no chance to breathe! Now ‘AmbReigns’ are getting buss arse… and The Xavier is playing the trombone… and shouting – TOASTY!!! Like his name is Dominik Diamond in the Mortal Kombat games!
Hey side thought – whatever happened to Dominik Diamond??? Must be a middle aged man now surely???
Match dun between New day and AmbReigns – but when you hear that savage guitar riff… THAT’S IT! Well Ambrose isn’t afraid right? F5 to Ambrose – BLAOW!!! I give Ambrose 10/10 for bravery, 0 for achievement!
SALUTE. GRANT BODY-P!!!
IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!
Time to put you IWC muthaf***az on BLAST!!! The Rock made the cover of WWE2K14, you lot were B!TCHES. Austin makes the cover of WWE2K16, not a peep out of you b!tches. All is right in the world. Hey! I love Austin as much as the next man, I don’t give a f**k who’s on the cover… but it told me a lot about you b!tches, let me tell ya!
Don’t EVER associate me with the IWC. You acted without the benefit of intellect. The real wrestling fans holla at yo boy!
Infamous Informer – Wolverhampton’s Last Outlaw – Grant Body – P!! RAW #1154: HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!
Late Night Survival Kit: Tortilla Pringles, Double Choc digestive (Freeze those muthaf***az Sub Zero as f**k!) KA Karribbean Cola, and some ice cream for later!
I wonder if they gonna follow through with the storyline? Is Kane really in Hawaii? Are J&J really crusin in that Cadillac?
I believe in God… but Brock – The God of Violent Retribution??? WHOA!!! I wouldn’t go that far! When Brock throws muthaf***az off cells and through the ring and tombstones through limousines – then come talk to me!
Heyman – don’t talk about my Undertaker like that!!!! I let it burn, don’t rub it in!!!
OOHHHHHH SH!T – The beatings begin tonight!!!! Seth broke the 11th Commandment! Seth you better give your soul to the lord, because your carcass belongs to BRRRRROCCCK LESSSSNAR!
Oh sh!t they ARE going along with the storyline! Seth is all by himself! watch this – Seth gets buss arse, then next week he blames J&J for gong on that road trip and Kane for taking that vacation! That’s if Seth makes it to next week of course…
The Miz is actually rallying the audience to get Ryback & Big Show to destroy each other!!! WOW!!! He is entertaining!!! Don’t over do it now…. before the two of em think – ‘this bwoy outta order & bright – let’s beat out his blodclart!’
What was the crowd chanting? Cleveland sucks? You should be chanting – F**k Miz Up!!!!
Seems like Ryback & Big Show heard me! Miz took his farss self and interrupted the match, finds himself in the middle of two big angry guys! Shell Shock – BLAOW!!!! Big Show picks him up – Chokeslam – BLAOW!!!! Sympathy??? I have none!
GRANT BODY – P!
Aaaaah sh!t!!! J&J are in fact Crusin together! Why aren’t they packing it up with honeyz??? Some bromance sh!t going on??
This week, Paige takes on Brie Bella… come on Brie… get her!!!! KILL HER!!!
Mike Cole acknowledging Nikki’s title reign – 225 days… 70 to go…but Nikki is going for #Roadto300!!! I support it 300%!!! As long as Naomi or Tamina is not the opponent… I’m backing Nikki with long d!ck hip hop profession!!!!
GRANT BODY – P!
YES BRIE!!!! About time you won girl!!! Alicia Fox and Nikki making sure Paige don’t come back…. no diva back stage is supporting Paige… because she’s a spoilt brat who acts like the ring is her house – but these divas been in the game longer than her!!! And AJ Lee don’t care… she happy with her husband! F**KOUTTAHERE PAIGE! YOU LOSE!!!
You know what… I didn’t realise RAW was in Chicago this week!!! Their ‘God’ couldn’t defeat the WWE machine… so Paige got no chance!
Sheamus Vs Ladies favourite Roman Reigns and this muthaf**k!n crowd are chanting for a man who cares not for wrestling because it’s ‘fake’… Chicago people are the WORST fans in the world, they refuse to let it burn. The only two good things that came out of Chicago are Mike Knoxxx and Married with Children!
FOR REAL???? A fake looking Bray Wyatt came out, Roman Reigns throwing fist and fire and all along… Wyatt was on the titan tron on some ‘Anyone but you’ sh!t…
While Sheamus looks confused in his head, Randall got voices in his head telling him to f**k Sheamus up!!!! RKO – BLAOW!!! There’s another match set up for Battleground – can I get a stipulation???
FOR REAL??? J&J come back to the WWE joint? And picked up no honeyz????? Ok I’m really starting to think J&J are…. well lets just say they got Rainbows on their FB profile pic….
GRANT BODY – P!
Rusev is still bex!!!! Damn you worse than the Chicago crowd! Well at least was a fine @$$ chick like Lana… she sexy as f**k… The Chicago Crowd only got erection for CM Princess Peach B!tch!
Uh oh Ziggler is out here! Is Lana out to turn the other cheek??? Then fix her blouse & skirt???!!!
Oh no!!!! Ziggler said Rusev ruined a Janet Jackson classic! Disrespected J Dilla!!! Ok very good Ziggler – you tryna get some credibility points from me!
Wait a minute – RUSEV – TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!! There was nothing wrong with that muthaf***a! Beating down Ziggler with his ‘now good leg!!!’ Beat him down with his crutches! MY GOD THAT IS ENOUGH! NAH RUSEV – KEEP GOING!!! BEAT THAT MUTHAF***A!!!
Yes Bo Dallas you are a good person… all you gotta do is BO-Lieve! Chicago you don’t get The Rock but you get Dean Ambrose! BO-Lieve you gonna get BUSS ARSE!!!
LET’S GO AMBROSE! – WE BO-LIEVE!!! Chicago Bo-Lieves!!! Do you Bo-Lieve your God is coming back to WWE? HAHA SHUT THE F**K UP!!!
GRANT BODY – P!!!
If anyone is due to attend the Ambrose Asylum it’s gotta be Seth Rollins… calling out BRRROCCCK LESSSSNARRR??? Pass me the hymn book…
Who knows? Maybe The New Day will aid Seth Rollins and buss up Brock Lesnar as revenge for what happened in Japan?
FOR REAL WRESTLING FANS???? You paused your Sky Box to see this??? Best not show STC member Edd Mulhall – this will take him over the edge!
Screenshot courtesy of Powerbomb Pro Wrestling News
Why have I got that feeling that $55,000 Cadillac is gonna get f**ked up by Brock Lesnar??? I mean, Lesnar ain’t no Austin but….
Rollins and J&J are armed! They ready to give beatings to Brock!!! I know Rollins did not call Lesnar – Heyman’s b!tch!!! …………………How Great Thou Art… How Great Thou Art….
Oh sh!t – Brock was about to walk into the ring….but he’s walking back….. I know what he’s about to do!!! OHHHH SH!!!!!T!
OH SNAP!!! Brock send for the axe!!! I think Brock has played the bonus stage on Street Fighter IV!!!
Joey Mercury crying like a b!tch – OH MY CAR!!!! Lesnar with a Belly to Belly suplex to Joey Mercury into the car – BLAOW! Brock broke Noble’s arm with the Kimura lock! That’s what you get for not packing it up with honeyz!
PERFECT!!! (Points Roll Up) – GRANT BODY – P!!
THE NEW DAY LIVE!!! It’s a GLORIOUS DAY! I keep telling you fools – Brock took it easy on Kofi and The New Day in Japan! They got off lightly! Look at em now! Full of positivity!
Apparently my girl is not too pleased with me! Because I posted a pic of myself on my Facebook and it wasn’t exclusive to her! I committed a crime people! I should be punished for teasing you women because you can’t have the Infamous Daywalker! You can take your fingers out now… or you can carry on!!!
GRANT BODY – P!!
Big up to Titus O’Neill! cussing JBL for not calling the match between New Day and Lucha Dragons and instead talking about the Cadillac Brock destroyed!
Look at Cena surveying the damage!!! Oh dear!!!! Cena’s like – damn I only got 16 suplex from Brock??? I got lucky!
Oh dear I think Kevin Owens gonna cry in that same car because he lost the NXT title to FINN BALOOOOOOOOR!!! That entrance though…. wait a minute??? Kevin Owens is here!!!! Maybe Owens gonna take the challenge now instead of Battleground!
Hold up!!!! Cesaro’s interrupting the proceedings! I smell a triple threat – but will it be for Battleground? Summerslams???
Owens actually leaving the ring because Cesaro said so???? WHOA!!!! Somebody elect Cesaro for wrestler of the year! Rolling Stones – GET IN THE CHAIR!!!
(Side note: Rollin Stones elected Kevin Owens as wrestler of the year…)
So now it’s Cesaro Vs John Cena for the US Title… can you imagine if Cesaro wins in front of a Chicago crowd????
Chicago crowd chanting THIS IS AWESOME! As Cena and Cesaro deliver a great wrestling contest… ok just waiting for Owens to f**k this up like he did the last week…
Can’t hate on Cena now can you Chicago? Cena has being consistently dropping quality matches since he started this US Open challenge!
By the end of this year the candidates for match of the year may all involve Cena at this rate!
What a wicked piece of match! Cena finished Cesaro with the AA super move off the 2nd rope… it could have been the neutralizer of the top… And Kevin Owens tryna beat up Cena didn’t work… bwoy that S on Cena chest proper shining now!
But I have to sing ‘How Great Thou Art’ to the Cadillac…. the REAL VICTIM… that car did nothing to Brock….. NOTHING I TELL YOU!!!
IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!
It’s only right that I start the blog off like this. Even if you’re not a fan (which I’m not), you gotta pay respects to one of the foundations of wrestling. Take a bow Barry Landel, LIVE ON LIVE LONG.
(Er… I don’t think WWE gonna do the massive tribute for him like they did Dusty… no bell tolling 10 times or anything like that…)
I’m sure Heaven got a full roster now…. HWF (Heaven Wrestling Federation)… that’s what I’m calling it! Let’s keep it moving y’all! RAW #1152! Hol’ Dat – RECORD SKIP!!! Virgin Media says I can’t watch live??? MUTHAF***A!
Hang on, let me get this right so I can understand this: Brock Lesnar has to give an apology for his actions back in April, but it’s Mike Cole doing the apologising??!!! HA! HA! HA! Yeah Mike… APOLOGISE!!! For being a WACK commentator when sh!t pops off! You stay quiet and sh!t… you don’t make the sh!t exciting! Fans cannot hate heels because YOU MIKE COLE don’t make it sound convincing like JR did! JR – that man made you HATE the heels. Now everyone cheers the heels and it’s YOUR FAULT!!!! Brock apologizes to JAY-BEE because he does his job properly!
Did you hear the crowd roar when Paul Heyman described Seth Rollins??!!! I’m just waiting for the meme that follows that!!!
Oh sh!!!!!t! July 19… mark it in your calendar people! Seth has a one way, all expenses paid, first class ticket to Suplex City B!TCH!!! the question remains: Will Seth smile through the onslaught????
It is a sad day, when Kane has to get help from Seth Rollins to defeat Dean Ambrose… not saying that Ambrose is weak but we talking Kane here! The big red retard who can finally speak!!!! (Shout out to The Rock!) But words from the wise to the guys in the locker room: When fighting Kane or Undertaker, NEVER go top ropes!!! They grab you by your neck, Chokeslam off the top rope – BLAOW!!! And Mike Cole didn’t even call that properly! FOOL!
YES PRIME TIME PLAYERS! AH YU DAT??!!! They defeated The Decension!!!! A part of me wats the Decension to stay in the main roster, the other part of me says ‘send dem muthaf***az back to NXT’- dem nah ready!!! You know what I really want? I want Kane to stop his foolishness, take the Decension under his wing… 3 man team – The Fires of Hell!!! I’m telling you – it would work!!!!
Look how Undertaker did it – formed The Ministry, The Brood, Acolytes, Mideon & Viscera, that’s 7 guys plus Undertaker. 5 of the 7 turned out successful in the end!
Are you not entertained Sheamus? I bet you are now! Roman Reigns beating you down and sh!t!
That is f**ked up!!!! How has Bray got f**ked up pics of Reigns in that dark room with candles and sh!t, acting like he’s having a tea party with Reigns daughter?
Now this is what I’m talking about Bray! Less of the cryptic shit you do and more of this deranged mind games! You took the advice onboard! Superb work Wyatt! Now let me hear the next person who complains about you…
“Xavier has got a lot to say, that’s all there is to it…” (JBL)
Well THE GRANT SAYS – You lucky Xavier hasn’t got a loud-speaker like Jimmy Hart! Or what about Daivari, who used to manage Muhammad Hassan! His mouth went at 100 miles an hour, and he spoke ‘Arab’!!! I put it in quotations because that was character back then!
With the PTP rushing the ring to even things up with the New Day, I’m surprised this match between Neville and Kingston wasn’t turned into a 6 man tag team ma…. Oh I forgot, Teddy Long wasn’t there…
I’m not a fan of both guys, but when Barrett turned his elbow pad red, and hit the Bullhammer super move to Wack Ryder while he was on top ropes… THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL!!! BOOOOOOOM!!!
You know what Cena, big ups to WWE editing all that bla-bla-bla you do… I understand how you roll and all that… but I’d turn to Kevin Owens and say F**K YOU! I ain’t giving you an US Title shot! Because I issued an open challenge to you and you said NO. You stamp on my title like it’s garbage, You forgot great champions like Harley Race, Booker-T & Goldberg held this title muthaf***a? I challenge you for your NXT title and you say NO? F**K YOU!!! At Battleground, I’ll just f**k you up! Keep it Real huh????
WTF did Kevin Owens just say??? He just spoke in a different language! Answers on a postcard please at my twitter @MZATheInfamous!
Never mind hold the tweets! Now both muthaf***az speaking in French! god dammit where’s Maryse when you need her? In fact f**k that – Lillian Garcia – speak Spanish for me girl! F**k that – where’s my Roselyn Sánchez?? My Senorita??
See that woman above? You may have seen her in Devious Maids or Without a Trace or Boat Trip or most notably, Rush Hour 2, She only has to speak, and mi cocky stan up!!!
GRANT BODY – P!!!
F**K ME!!!! Naomi how are you gonna bounce off the second turnbuckle like that baby girl??? Sorry to be profane but that girl can f**k… just by watching those few seconds! In fact – f**k that – this is my blog – I ain’t apologizing for sh!t!
Just watch the first few seconds… but if you’re a Paige fan this won’t apply to you!
GRANT BODY – P!
AAAH SH!T! Tamina set up Nikki for the Rear End super move from Naomi, Nikki ducks, Naomi hits Tamina! Bellas pick up the win… CURSES!
Is that all Ryback??? A splash off the top ropes to defeat Mark Henry??? Oh mannnn!!! I expected you to pull off a 450 or something!!! Oh I get it… you heard about that Uhaa Nation dude… haha!!! Soon Ryback… soon!
You see this match right here? Adam Rose Vs Dolph Ziggler? This is that toilet break sh!t… Now as i mention it… I feel for the toilet now excuse me…
Maybe it is still worth watching after all… if it’s good for Rusev… I suppose it’s good for me!
Is it me or does Lana look unhappy? What’s wrong Lana, is it because Ziggler discovered what your name is backwards and wanted to try that sexual position???
GRANT BODY – P!!!
If there is one thing I will never understand more than smoking, its Anal intercourse. I mean… (JR VOICE – There’s DOODOO IN THERE! FOR GOD’S SAKES!)
OH SNAP! was Lana’s hair meant to all flow out then? Ziggler couldn’t even do that right! And his kissing technique is still suspect! I’m sitting here in disbelief… So is Rusev by the looks of things…
Rusev so bex he threw away his crutches and him drop down ah ground! HAHAHAHA!!! MAKE IT BURN, MAKE IT BURN, (YOU GON LEARN!) MAKE IT BURRRRRNNNNNNN!!!
Wait a minute… what’s this?? Summer Rae???? Giving back Rusev his crutches? Don’t tell me she wants some of the super athlete??? Oh I see where this is going here! Mixed tag match: Rusev & Summer Vs Ziggler & Lana… I don’t know when, but remember I told ya!
Rusev.. you DO realise she’s a ‘Stupid American’… right??? That don’t mean sh!t when it comes to pum-pum!!!
GRANT BODY – P!
Listen to Seth Rollins begging the Authority to Take Him Back.. this isn’t Ghostface Killah And Jackie-O muthaf***a!
OH SNAP!!! Here Comes The Pain! But can he Bring The Pain to the Authority??? Rollins got a taste of suplex city, but has Kane waited all this time to wreak revenge for what happened to his older brother at WrestleMania last year? Chokeslam to Lesnar – BLAOW!!!
Did I… dis I just see Seth Rollins drop the CURB STOMP super move to Lesnar from the top ropes??? I think I did!!! BACKSIDE!
Another Chokeslam by Kane – BLAOW!!! (That was for breaking the streak muthaf***a!!!)
FOR REAL???? Rollins hit the Pedigree on Lesnar???? OH SH!T! Suplex City has a mayor! and his name is TRIPLE TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!!!!
GRANT BODY – P!!!
IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!
It’s only right that I start the blog off like this. Even if you’re not a fan (which I’m not), you gotta pay respects to one of the foundations of wrestling. Take a bow Dusty Rhodes, LIVE ON LIVE LONG.
Sheamus is LOADED! Nikki going for 295! Cena CAN wrestle.. how many fans had heart failure? This is the aftermath! RAW #1151! HOL’DAT-BLAOW!
Well… somebody’s happy isn’t he? He retained his title, and he did it all on his own… somebody stick a gold star on this muthaf***a! Anyone would think Seth Rollins finished reading his first link-up book!
(A Big Bus.)
(A Big Red Bus.)
(A Big Red Bus In Hill Street.)
GRANT BODY – P! GETTHEF**KOUTTAHERE!!!
Oh for real? Welcome to Monday Night RAWLINS???!!!! He’s thanking us for being here! Well thank you Seth! You and Ambrose put on a classic match word up!
Damn Seth got a shout out list? Shall we play the 9th Wonder instrumental???
Hang on – he’s bigging up himself???? What about Triple & Steph? I thought Triple was proud of him? Not even they get props? Wait a minute – he should punch his ticket to the Hall Of Fame???? This man OUTTA ORDA & BRIGHT!
OH SNAP! Is that how Dean Ambrose gonna congratulate his adversary? Give him some more beatings??? HAHAHA! He ain’t going anywhere until Rollins comes back so he can get some more beatings!
Last week Joey Mercury pinned Rollins… you best give him his well deserved title shot RAWLINGS!
I thought this rivalry was over… I thought not!
I think Rawlings is in a little bit of trouble…. running his mouth disrespecting the whole authority…who’s the next opponent? I think we know don’t you sexy ladies and b!tch @$$ muthaf***az!
Big up Sheamus! The new Mr Munny Innah Bank! What’s wrong fat @$$ IWC jabronies? you didn’t like that sh!t? Do The Knowledge you big dummies!
Dean and Sheamus love a fight… and we love a fight too!!!! GET HIM DEAN! Mess up that Rocksteady Headtop!
Damn son! Sheamus just f**k!n up Ambrose legs!!!! Ambrose would rather pass out than tap to Rocksteady! So who’s Bebop? Mark Henry???
GRANT BODY – P!!!
UH-OH!!! Randall!!!! Caused Shadfather’s favourite move! Ambrose got the Distraction Roll Up pin to Sheamus! Forget all that – Randall was out to finish Sheamus! RKO – BL…..no Sheamus blocked it!
Oh dear Joey Mercury heard me!!!! He wants to test RAWlings for the World Wrestling Federation Championship! Make it happen RAWlings!!!! #GiveJandJAChance! Make it trend! Put it on your twitter! Matter of fact – I’ll do that my damn self!
For real? They just did a Fatherhood advert featuring Roman Reigns? They’re not turning him heel now! IWC Make it Burn! Throw the rumours out the window!
Is it me or does Wade Barrett’s theme sound racist???? And you wonder why I can’t stand that muthaf***a!
OOOOHHHHH SH!!!T! It’s Kevin Owens!!! Looks like he’s gonna run the NXT open challenge! I believe I have found the right opponent for him… Could it be this b!tch?
Photo courtesy of STC Member Edd Mulhall
What the hell was she doing there? Answers on a postcard please! Tweet me @MZATheInfamous!
So that’s why you f**ked up Cena? Because Cena told you ‘You belong here’? Ok now we know not to compliment Owens!
Now this muthaf***a wants the US Title! I thought it was beneath you Owens? Anyway who’s gonna take the challenge? Dolph Ziggler? Is he bringing his new gyal?
Backing Kevin Owens here – COME ON OWENS!!!! Powerbomb Ziggler’s clart like you did Cena at the Munny Innah Bank!
I am disappointed! I was hoping for Chyna to come out! (Yo Mike she and Steph have beef) I DON’T GIVE A DAMN! Vincent Kennedy squashed the beef with Bret, Bruno, Warrior, and whoever else. Look at Warrior. He’s no longer with us in the physical… Steph – you gotta make it burn – same goes for you Chyna, sort your sh!t out!
See with Chyna all she gotta do his punch Owens in his d!ck and take his sh!t!!! She invented the low blow!
Well since the NXT championship isn’t on the line, what happens if Ziggler beats him? I’m saying hmmmmm….
Pop-up Powerbomb – BLAOW!!!! Ziggler finish!!!! I just love the look on jabronies faces when Ziggler loses.. can’t kiss Lana right… all sorts of sh!t…
Where does Paige think she’s going? Rallying the rest of the divas to stop the Bella Twins? The women must take Paige for joke? Little 22-year-old milk of magnesia trying to lead the likes of my beautiful Naomi? My sexy Layla? Tamina? Alicia Fox??? Rosa Mendes? Are you smoking that tical Paige????
Meme courtesy of STC member Adam Maskell
My thoughts exactly Undertaker…. Paige outta order and bright!
Speaking of Undertaker, considering that he’s a few years older than Kane… Kane’s conditioning is better than that of his ‘brother’…
…and speaking of his ‘brother’… Ok Seth Rollins you’re pushing it now! Why do you love provoking Kane so much??? Mentioning Paul Bearer and the don of dons… er Seth… look at the meme above these sentences….
Damn come on RAW hurry up and get to the handicap divas match! I wanna see the Bellas knock Paige the f**k out! I wanna see what Wyatt gotta say about dropping Reigns with the Sister Abigail for no reason!
YES! Roman Reigns coming down the stairs! The women grabbing his d!ck!!!
It was injustice what Wyatt done! Oh no not this crazy cryptic sh!t!!! Or maybe not!!!! It all stems from when he defeated Wyatt last week! Stole his moment! Why did we not clock this before!
OH MY GOD!!! (I have to put on my JR Voice) BRAY’S GOING AFTER ROMAN’S DAUGHTER! HE COULD NOT BE THAT HEINOUS! WHAT A SICK & TWISTED HUMAN BEING! Yo that is f**ked up yo! No Roman – you have to F**k up Wyatt now…. this is some Cradle To the Grave sh!t now… some DMX & Vanessa sh!t!
Here we go… Bellas on Paige handicap match! Come on Bellas, beat out her blodclart!
Superb wrestling skill by Nikki! Caught Paige in the head scissors, turning her on her stomach and doing press ups! Can your favourite wrestler do that??? NO – SHUT THE F**K UP!
Shout out to Xzibit! Choke her Spank her Pull her hair!
Nikki hit the elbow on Paige! FINISH HER! Nikki hits the rack attack on Paige – BLAOW!!! FATALITY!
Oh hell to the no – that Machine Gun scrawny idiot is gonna perform??? Ok this is the part where I watch babestation…
In fact f**k that – Let me play one of the latest tunes I’m feeling…
YES KEVIN OWENS! MY HERO! MY MAN!!! He just powerbombed Machine Gun pu$$yclart skinny leggings wearing b!tch through the stage!!! That was the best thing I’ve ever seen! F**k that fake sh!t! We don’t do that over here! Kevin Owens supports REAL HIP HOP!!!! HE IS BRILLIANT!!!
Why are the commentators bex for? I didn’t wanna hear that noise! The fans sure as hell didn’t! I wonder what Mike Knoxxx of the BDSIR Network/Fox Sports gotta think about that???
Big up the Primetime Players! New World Wrestling Federation Tag Team Champions! But can the New Day take back their titles?
Well this is a 6-man jump off, My dude Neville joins the PTP, against the team that uses the POP: the Power Of Positivity!
I know Dean Ambrose ain’t playing ‘Bullseye’ using Seth Rollins as the dartboard!
And people ain’t gonna stop until they get Kane to come to his senses and send for his mask and tombstone people and set them on fire! Come on Kane!!!!! This is why the fans loved you back in the day! Stop fooling yourself man!
Finally! We gonna find out who RAWlins next opponent is…. surely it can’t be the man that’s rumoured??? The man who defeated the don of dons and shocked the world??!!!
Triple’s dress sense is becoming more like Vincent Kennedy isn’t it???
Seth seems to have a smile on his face…. I dunno Seth! Do you need the toilet? My instincts tell me you may need it!
Once again Steph your black dress – OHHHHHHHH!!!!!! Triple – get her for the lads!!!!!
HERE COMES A NEW CHALLENGER!!!! BRRRRROCCCCK LESSSSSSSNAR!!!!! He gotta Suplex City shirt!!!! That’s it now! What happened to your smile Seth? You’re the architect… right??? You are the future…..huh???!!! The Shield…. all that boasting? All that bravado? You can take him surely??? Your comrade Roman Reigns did!!! You are the best WWE champion of all time??? THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT YOU SAID! Now get in there and SHUDDUP!!!!
On a real though people… this week’s Raw… if you DVR’d it… you’re gonna fast forward a lot of sh!t… but don’t fast forward too much past Machine Gun b!tch @$$… Anyway guys, I think Seth Rollins will be needing the men’s room, nobody go in there for about 35-45 minutes… somebody open the window…
Thoughts and prayers go out to the family of Seth Rollins…
GRANT BODY – P!!!
IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!
I wanna give a shout out to my Facebook friend Lesley Steelergirl a.k.a. WuSteelah for tagging me in the House Party 90s mix on my Facebook page… back then, you needed to learn to dance. No holding a beer and acting a fool to these classics!!!
Before I move on let me put y’all wrestling jabronies at ease. Jon Stewart is NOT gonna fight Seth Rollins at WrestleMania…dunno where y’all got the idea from fool!
Plus: #FCUKDIRTSHEETS! They are the devil. They are designed to make you moan and b!tch over WrestleMania.
Plus: Quit all this Brock Lesnar talk. It is all swerves (probably by WWE themselves to make you take your mind off the main event and show how gullible you are.
With all that said…Let’s do this sh!t! RAW #1136, HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!
14,781 cats on deck this week!!!! New Jersey represent!!!
See Seth Rollins be talking sh!t about beating down Jon Stewart… INJUSTICE!!! Roman Reigns must come down the stairs!!!! All the ladies trying to touch him up, hoping to grope his front!!!! (Nicola Box I see you!!!)
Ha ha Don’t give me joke Rollins! You would what? Out rap Wiz Khalifa??? You probably can! Wiz Khalifa is WACK!!!
WTF? Am I hearing CM P**K chants in the building???? Ok all 14,781 of you are all B!TCHES!!!!
…and Dean F**k!n Ambrose is still walking round with the Intercontinental Title!!!! I wonder, did he put it in the fridge at home??? Wade Barrett – what sort of champ are you if you can’t look after your tingz? You can’t even handle Alicia Fox, let alone title!
GRANT BODY – P!!!
I know Seth did not tell Randall that he can out wrestle ANYONE on the WWE roster….. Right calling it now – Randall wins at WrestleMania by simply – out wrestling Rollins… Rollins could possibly cash his cheque for real!
Looks like the trend #GiveTruthAChance has worked! R-Truth is now in the Intercontinental Ladder Match at WrestleMania! This match right here, I can’t call, and that’s how I like my WrestleMania matches…
Sounds like Luke Harper wants in!!! He took off with the Intercontinental title!!! He can’t do that!!! And Shadfather, that is not a distraction roll up… they must have listened to you man! Ambrose took advantage of the distraction, Dirty Deeds to Barrett – BLAOW!!!
OH SNAP!!!!! Sandow just shut the Miz down!!! The Miz stars in the latest commercial – Niagra! You know what that is? A product that helps erectile dysfunction! Oh my days – shamed in front of Summer Rae, Paige, Cameron and others!!!! That ain’t PG surely!!!! Maryse can you confirm this???? The Miz can’t put in work????? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
GRANT BODY – P!!!
Ha! The New face of fear???? I don’t fear that fool with a lantern??? I don’t follow the buzzards??? I’m not down with that sh!t!
I like Wyatt’s leather jacket though! Watch da ryde – this is gonna be a casket match…. remember I told ya…
So is that how it goes down? You gonna set the casket on fire??? If you ask me Undertaker’s making you look like a fool right now! He’s just ignoring yo’ @$$! You’re playing yourself homie! It’s like Jay-Z responding to all these other idiots… you only get half a bar…. F**K Y’ALL N!&&@$!
I was wondering when this match was gonna happen….Usos & Naomi Vs Cesaro/Tyson & Natalya!!!!
John Cena has gone on record and said that Cesaro is underrated….interesting!
Why would Tyson Kidd tag in his injured wife? That wasn’t very smart! My girl Naomi gets the win – that’s what’s up!!!!
Whoa Whoa Whoa wait a minute – Cena – you can’t enter the André The Giant Battle Royal???? Oh boy the Anti-Cenation ain’t gonna like that! Even Stephanie thought – has this man watched the news??? Holy sh!t Stephanie just put Cena on blast and the fans love it!!!!! Now AxelMania wants in the battle royal? WHOA!!! He could win! Crowd chanting AxelMania! Maybe Axel not being in the Rumble, must have been a blessing! Oh snap – Curtis Axel ripped his shirt!!! I wonder what Hogan must be thinking? Cena has warned Axel… he’s gonna f**k him up! Or to put it in Wrestling nerd terms, he’s gonna ‘bury’ Axel!!! I’d never thought I’d say this but…COME ON AXEL!!!! This could be a Cena/Angle moment from 2002!
GOD DAMNIT!!!! Axel you couldn’t do better than that????
Hold up – Rusev is here! Will he change his mind about challenging Cena??? Uh oh don’t chant USA-USA-USA! Now look what you 14,781 jabronies have done… Rusev says NO!
Just for the record, The WrestleMania theme tune is WACK!!!! David Guetta f**kouttahere!
But now time for Triple Teef to say his usual ‘I am the game-errrr…’ ‘Sting is not ready-errrrr…’ ‘ it took him 14 years – errrrrr!!!!’
Uh-oh, what does Triple want with Booker-T? Oh man Wrestlemania XIX… brings back horrible memories….
OH SH!T!!!!! Triple put the IWC on blast again!!! MAXIMUM POINTS TRIPLE! Don’t ruin it now….
MUTHAF***A…. He fired Booker-T???? The day after his birthday? THAT’S F**KED UP…
Thank god Triple was f**k!n with Booker…. you get your points back…
Divas title jump off!!!! Paige Vs Nikki Bella…. still backing the full-bodied gold digger here!
I mean, look at Nikki’s skin tone… I don’t understand how you guys love Paige? Milk of Magnesia NO THANK YOU!!!
GRANT BODY – P!!!
Dayum Nikki pulled off the Alabama Slam? Nikki gets maximum props from me, I think… spinebuster???? Seriously I think Nikki’s wrestling skills have surpassed that of Brie!
TEEEEEEEEEF!! Paige had the match won! She had the PTO submission super move! Brie Bella putting the boots on Paige! Next minute AJ Lee comes out!!!! She still got beef with the Bellas! WROOOOY! 14,781 on their feet! Chanting CM P**K…. Ok I’m DUN. NEW JERSEY YOU ARE DICK-RIDING B!TCHES. Get em Vince…..
OH NO NOT THE DAILY SHOW WITH SETH ROLLINS?!!! This is bound to be funny!
Thank you stupid stream, I missed half that sh!t… but Jon Stewart is here! I pay £9.99 for this WWE Network – why can’t they put RAW on there???
Damn First Stephanie, now Jon Stewart put Seth Rollins on BLAST! Told him about himself! That he’s wack! He doesn’t earn sh!t like Bruno, Gorilla Monsoon, Undertaker! The Money Inna Bank briefcase – he didn’t earn that sh!t! WHOA!!! Rollins can’t take the pressure! tries to beat him up… but he kicks him in his tools! Jon Stewart hung out with the Wu-Tang Clan… He ain’t sweating no Rollins!
So basically this Intercontinental storyline… the guys involved are in turn stealing Barrett’s title… looks like Danny might want in as well…. but silence… the latest HOF inductee…
Dayum Alundra/Madusa! I have a weakness for legs… see? Vincent Kennedy is a forgiving man, she dashed the women’s title in the bin at WCW and still inducted her… he’s a good man!
51 years old…. I’d still hit that!!!!
GRANT BODY – P!!!
Paul Heyman – YOU ARE THE F**K!N MAN – OK!!!! Lesnar rumours SHUT DOWN ONE TIME – See that’s why I can’t stand wrestling fans because like Triple H said – y’all think you know everything but really you don’t know SH!T!!!!
Paul’s promo was so don, that the mic died 3 times over…. why doesn’t Heyman get nominated for best mic skills? Sorry Bray, you can’t test him!
Paul brought up that word again – EMASCULATED!!!! I don’t think Roman Reigns is like John Cena at Summerslam! He ain’t gonna let Lesnar suplex him 16 times!
…and as usual, Seth Rollins is here taking on Roman Reigns, Rollins got his peoples behind him… so TEEF! OH SNAP!!! Randall Teef Orton is here!!!! Who the viper gonna strike first?
Randall is just relaxing over the other side of the ring! Without a care in the world like – I’m just here to read the comments on some Michael Jackson popcorn sh!t…
Or maybe not! Randall cost Reigns the match! But that only angered Reigns as he took the whole authority! Spears left and right! Haters admitting that was a good spear… that’s because you were supporting Reigns in the beginning in the Shield days you fickle dickhead!
Notice – Reigns destroyed everyone except Orton… Orton is like – All the pieces are in place and it’s my game… because that’s what it is!
Stars of this week – Stephanie, Jon Stewart and Paul Heyman…. the way they put their targets on blast was incredible….
IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!