Tag Archives: Paul Heyman

Monday Night Raw #1152, June 22, 2015!!!

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Barry Landel

It’s only right that I start the blog off like this. Even if you’re not a fan (which I’m not), you gotta pay respects to one of the foundations of wrestling. Take a bow Barry Landel, LIVE ON LIVE LONG.

(Er… I don’t think WWE gonna do the massive tribute for him like they did Dusty… no bell tolling 10 times or anything like that…)

I’m sure Heaven got a full roster now…. HWF (Heaven Wrestling Federation)… that’s what I’m calling it! Let’s keep it moving y’all! RAW #1152! Hol’ Dat – RECORD SKIP!!! Virgin Media says I can’t watch live??? MUTHAF***A!

WWF PROPA TINGZSource: WWE.Com

Hang on, let me get this right so I can understand this: Brock Lesnar has to give an apology for his actions back in April, but it’s Mike Cole doing the apologising??!!! HA! HA! HA! Yeah Mike… APOLOGISE!!! For being a WACK commentator when sh!t pops off! You stay quiet and sh!t… you don’t make the sh!t exciting! Fans cannot hate heels because YOU MIKE COLE don’t make it sound convincing like JR did! JR – that man made you HATE the heels. Now everyone cheers the heels and it’s YOUR FAULT!!!! Brock apologizes to JAY-BEE because he does his job properly!

Did you hear the crowd roar when Paul Heyman described Seth Rollins??!!! I’m just waiting for the meme that follows that!!!

Oh sh!!!!!t! July 19… mark it in your calendar people! Seth has a one way, all expenses paid, first class ticket to Suplex City B!TCH!!! the question remains: Will Seth smile through the onslaught????

It is a sad day, when Kane has to get help from Seth Rollins to defeat Dean Ambrose… not saying that Ambrose is weak but we talking Kane here! The big red retard who can finally speak!!!! (Shout out to The Rock!) But words from the wise to the guys in the locker room: When fighting Kane or Undertaker, NEVER go top ropes!!! They grab you by your neck, Chokeslam off the top rope – BLAOW!!! And Mike Cole didn’t even call that properly! FOOL!

YES PRIME TIME PLAYERS! AH YU DAT??!!! They defeated The Decension!!!! A part of me wats the Decension to stay in the main roster, the other part of me says ‘send dem muthaf***az back to NXT’- dem nah ready!!! You know what I really want? I want Kane to stop his foolishness, take the Decension under his wing… 3 man team – The Fires of Hell!!! I’m telling you – it would work!!!!

Look how Undertaker did it – formed The Ministry, The Brood, Acolytes, Mideon & Viscera, that’s 7 guys plus Undertaker. 5 of the 7 turned out successful in the end!

Are you not entertained Sheamus? I bet you are now! Roman Reigns beating you down and sh!t!

That is f**ked up!!!! How has Bray got f**ked up pics of Reigns in that dark room with candles and sh!t, acting like he’s having a tea party with Reigns daughter?

Now this is what I’m talking about Bray! Less of the cryptic shit you do and more of this deranged mind games! You took the advice onboard! Superb work Wyatt! Now let me hear the next person who complains about you…

“Xavier has got a lot to say, that’s all there is to it…” (JBL)

Well THE GRANT SAYS – You lucky Xavier hasn’t got a loud-speaker like Jimmy Hart! Or what about Daivari, who used to manage Muhammad Hassan! His mouth went at 100 miles an hour, and he spoke ‘Arab’!!! I put it in quotations because that was character back then!

With the PTP rushing the ring to even things up with the New Day, I’m surprised this match between Neville and Kingston wasn’t turned into a 6 man tag team ma…. Oh I forgot, Teddy Long wasn’t there…

I’m not a fan of both guys, but when Barrett turned his elbow pad red, and hit the Bullhammer super move to Wack Ryder while he was on top ropes… THAT WAS BEAUTIFUL!!! BOOOOOOOM!!!

You know what Cena, big ups to WWE editing all that bla-bla-bla you do… I understand how you roll and all that… but I’d turn to Kevin Owens and say F**K YOU! I ain’t giving you an US Title shot! Because I issued an open challenge to you and you said NO. You stamp on my title like it’s garbage, You forgot great champions like Harley Race, Booker-T & Goldberg held this title muthaf***a? I challenge you for your NXT title and you say NO? F**K YOU!!! At Battleground, I’ll just f**k you up! Keep it Real huh????

WTF did Kevin Owens just say??? He just spoke in a different language! Answers on a postcard please at my twitter @MZATheInfamous!

Never mind hold the tweets! Now both muthaf***az speaking in French! god dammit where’s Maryse when you need her? In fact f**k that – Lillian Garcia – speak Spanish for me girl! F**k that – where’s my Roselyn Sánchez?? My Senorita??

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See that woman above? You may have seen her in Devious Maids or Without a Trace or Boat Trip or most notably, Rush Hour 2, She only has to speak, and mi cocky stan up!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

F**K ME!!!! Naomi how are you gonna bounce off the second turnbuckle like that baby girl??? Sorry to be profane but that girl can f**k… just by watching those few seconds! In fact – f**k that – this is my blog – I ain’t apologizing for sh!t!

Just watch the first few seconds… but if you’re a Paige fan this won’t apply to you!

GRANT BODY – P!

AAAH SH!T! Tamina set up Nikki for the Rear End super move from Naomi, Nikki ducks, Naomi hits Tamina! Bellas pick up the win… CURSES!

Is that all Ryback??? A splash off the top ropes to defeat Mark Henry??? Oh mannnn!!! I expected you to pull off a 450 or something!!! Oh I get it… you heard about that Uhaa Nation dude… haha!!! Soon Ryback… soon!

You see this match right here? Adam Rose Vs Dolph Ziggler? This is that toilet break sh!t… Now as i mention it… I feel for the toilet now excuse me…

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Maybe it is still worth watching after all… if it’s good for Rusev… I suppose it’s good for me!

Is it me or does Lana look unhappy? What’s wrong Lana, is it because Ziggler discovered what your name is backwards and wanted to try that sexual position???

GRANT BODY – P!!!

If there is one thing I will never understand more than smoking, its Anal intercourse. I mean… (JR VOICE – There’s DOODOO IN THERE! FOR GOD’S SAKES!)

OH SNAP! was Lana’s hair meant to all flow out then? Ziggler couldn’t even do that right! And his kissing technique is still suspect! I’m sitting here in disbelief… So is Rusev by the looks of things…GRANT BENT ON DESTRUCTION

Rusev so bex he threw away his crutches and him drop down ah ground! HAHAHAHA!!! MAKE IT BURN, MAKE IT BURN, (YOU GON LEARN!) MAKE IT BURRRRRNNNNNNN!!!

Wait a minute… what’s this?? Summer Rae???? Giving back Rusev his crutches? Don’t tell me she wants some of the super athlete??? Oh I see where this is going here! Mixed tag match: Rusev & Summer Vs Ziggler & Lana… I don’t know when, but remember I told ya!

Rusev.. you DO realise she’s a ‘Stupid American’… right??? That don’t mean sh!t when it comes to pum-pum!!!

GRANT BODY – P!

Listen to Seth Rollins begging the Authority to Take Him Back.. this isn’t Ghostface Killah And Jackie-O muthaf***a!

OH SNAP!!! Here Comes The Pain! But can he Bring The Pain to the Authority??? Rollins got a taste of suplex city, but has Kane waited all this time to wreak revenge for what happened to his older brother at WrestleMania last year? Chokeslam to Lesnar – BLAOW!!!

Did I… dis I just see Seth Rollins drop the CURB STOMP super move to Lesnar from the top ropes??? I think I did!!! BACKSIDE!

Another Chokeslam by Kane – BLAOW!!! (That was for breaking the streak muthaf***a!!!)

FOR REAL???? Rollins hit the Pedigree on Lesnar???? OH SH!T! Suplex City has a mayor! and his name is TRIPLE TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

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DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.

NEW STC LOGO 2015

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Monday Night Raw #1137, March 9, 2015!!!

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The Infamous Informer

I have a question for y’all, If Biggie Smalls was alive, do you think he would have appeared on WWE? Do you think he would have performed at a RAW or WrestleMania??? I say he would have. People say that if Big & Pac were alive, we wouldn’t have guys like Wiz Khalifa, who IS performing, that’s the part where I take my essential toilet break… unless of course he gets interrupted by BRRRROCCCK LESSSNAR!!!

I’m the Infamous Informer, and I have NO sympathy, NO compassion, NO remorse, and if Khalifa gets BUSS ARSE, I will……LAAAAAAAUGGGH!!!!!

Biggie Smalls Is Da Illest! RAW #1137, HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZThe Authority are proud of Randall Keith Orton!!!! Little do they know that Randall is playing them all!!! B!TCHES!!!

Listen to the Authority d!ck riding Randall!!! See Randall is like that dude – Agito Makashima… don’t know who he is? He’s the DON in the Guyver Anime Series! GUYVER III MUTHAF***A!

GUYVER 3Randall is gonna go all the way with this!!!!! Just like an undercover cop!!!!

Oh snap! Randall’s putting the Authority on BLAST!!!! It’s true – they are supposed to be OFFICIAL bad mans!!! They are acting like b!tches!!!!

Remember just a few years back you jabronies were saying Randy Boreton??? Remember that???? Now you cheer him…. Who’s changed???? HA! EXPOSED!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

They got that first segment done in just under 15 minutes! Very good!!!!

What the hell is Stardust doing with the IC Title??? Damn the IC title is getting f**ked like Suzette!!!! (Who’s Suzette???) I don’t know… ask GZA!!!! (Wu-Tang fans know what I did there!)

See that’s why me nah support Wade Barrett again, lost to Danny Bryan, he can’t tek di pressure… hits the bullhammer on Danny while he was celebrating… little biatch… next minute Dean F**k!ng Ambrose comes out and claps down Barrett!!! Haha!!!!

Doesn’t look like Goldust vs Stardust is running at WrestleMania at all… that’s cool with me still… I can ride to that! Goldust in the Battle Royal maybe? Stardust in the ladder match? No problems here!

Er Stardust… leaving the IC Title on the ring post doesn’t sound too smart!

What I wanna know is, how come Wade Barrett hasn’t come for his title???? What is he a sissy???? HAHAHAHAHA!!!

Oh here he is! Wade tryna beat on Ambrose, but he’s brought Ziggler, Harper, Danny and Stardust in the brawl!

I love this IC storyline!!!! Now we got 7 cats fighting over the IC title! But R-Truth is a clever muthaf***a! Wade Barrett getting bex with Truth because he got the title… So Truth is like – here, now stop your noise! Barrett retreating up the stairs only to find out he got the toy belt! That time Truth run gone with the real title! OH LAWWWWD!!!!

Big ups to Connor The Crusher! It’s funny, we the fans were talking about Connor getting inducted, (he beat Triple TEEF!!!!) Not only is he inducted, he gets the Ultimate Warrior award! THAT IS DAN!!!!

Connor beat Triple TEEF

You think about it, not many have beat Triple because he uses the hammer! But Connor did it! RESPECT!

Oh no…. pay attention, Paul Heyman is here!!!! OHHHHHH SH!!!!!!!!!!T! He got a video for us!

What a nice man… Heyman shows us a look at Roman Reigns and his career….

GOOD GAWD ALMIGHTY!!!! Paul Heyman might have out done himself from last weeks promo!!! He broke the mic again!!! He even hinted that Brock will UNIFY the UFC and WWE title!!! Can he do that??? BACKSIDE! Now the title no longer belongs to WWE? And if WWE tries a screwjob move or sends Seth Rollins to cash his cheque…. Somebody Gotta Die! If I Go, YOU GOTTA GO!!!

 

BACKFOOT! Erick Rowan won a match!!!!! only because Big Show hit the Sean P on Glenn…. That ain’t the issue hold up…

Now look what you two have done… you sent Stephanie’s sexy @$$ out here…. oh hang on that’s a good thing!

Yes – you two jabronies need to fix up – Stephanie – just give the man back his mask if you want him to be a don again… stop this Sunday School Trousers crap!

Look at the state of Wiz Khalifa??? Him nah dress proper! Hang on – look at Wizdow! He has ‘TGOD’ written on his hoodie? WTF does ‘T’ stand for??? If I find out it is a shot at Wu-Tang’s U-God….

STC WRESTLEMANIA 31 SIGN BDSIRSo while Wiz Khalifa chats his nonsense wearing a John Cena shirt walking round with sh!t locks… let the Infamous Informer entertain you with a proper tune, since we are celebrating Biggie’s life right now…

OH MY GOD!!! Summer Rae & Eva Marie dep pon mi telly??!!!! Let me pay attention… let me see if All Red Everything has improved her fighting style…

Oh – it’s a singles competition??? Ah sh!t!!!!

Right AJ Lee won – enough of that sh!t… now Sting explains why he wants to f**k up Triple Teef…

Well I can’t lie, during the Monday Night Wars and the attitude era, WCW was losing the war… who was WWF champion for the majority of that time? TRIPLE TEEEEEEEEEEEF!!! He used the hammer! I told you that man is NO GOOD! Amy Winehouse warned yo @$$!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Bless Curtis Axel! He’s after the US title at Big Big WrestleMania???? I say let him through! The crowd love him!

He’s like a glorified jobber – I’m not sure if Hulk Hogan or Mr Perfect will like what they are seeing here… oh well… no WrestleMania for Curtis Axel…. hey – maybe he will win the Battle Royal???

Well Cena did warn Rusev that if he talks sh!t about America, Cena gonna f**k him up….

…and he did using the STF super move! I smell an I QUIT match or some sort of submission match… look at Cena’s face when Lana accepted the challenge? BACKSIDE!!!! That ain’t heroic at all! It’s like Spiderman in the venom outfit!!!

Do I smell a Fatal 4 Way tag team championship match at WrestleMania as well? Cesaro/Kidd Vs Usos Vs New Day Vs.. the Ascension maybe? I hope so… I can ride to that! Everyone must decorate the kitchen table!

The MAN in the PURPLE SUIT!WHAAAAAAAAT!!! Naomi Vs Natalya right now???? Ok where’s the cocoa butter….

THAT’S WHAT’S UP!!! Naomi win again!!! Dayuuum I am fixing my trousers right now! Oh hang on what is this Los Jobberdore nonsense…Ok let me rephrase my vision – I smell a tag team turmoil match at WrestleMania…

While that’s on I’m gonna take a look at Ani James on babestation… she’s so fine – she makes my eyes roll into the back of my head!

We got 14,107 chanting that muthaf***a’s name… I just wanna line em all up and throw those d!ckhead wrestling fans in the concentration camps, Grant Hitler on they @$$!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Hmph! Here comes that outta order & bright Wyatt, he doesn’t watch the news! F**k!n with Undertaker is like throwing yourself head first in the grave and calling for the people to dig in the dirt!

14,107 with their iPhone lit up, you guys gonna get buss arse!

You see what happen when you f**k around with the urn? The powers come out, lights go out, all you see is lightning, the bell tolls, suddenly Sister Abigail’s armchair appears, all you hear is the Don’s voice… YOU WILL, REST IN PEACE!!!! But Wyatt seems to be laughing about it! The rocking chair bunn up! Wyatt goose cook! And he don’t even know it!!!!

I don’t think it’s worth talking about the handicap match between Roman Reigns and Seth/Randall… what I can say is this… NOW they are building that WrestleMania flava!

How dumb is Seth Rollins! Randall told him straight – he was gonna f**k him up… and that’s exactly what he did! Seth goes for the tag – Randall put his middle fingers up!!! Did he just do that? I think he did! Then the voices in his head chat to him, and told him to F**k up Seth Rollins! Destroyed him from pillar to post! FROM PILLAR TO POST! Vicious chair shots! a DDT into the concrete floor! sets up announce table, measures Rollins, RKO – BLAOW!!!!!!

The question remains – why didn’t Stephanie come out to stop this one? She did when it came to Big Show & Glenn! Oh that’s right… she remembered what happened in 2009!!!! Yep – best to stay out of Randall’s way when the voices chat to him!

THEY SAY, THAT WHEN IT RAINS, IT POURS… THEY’RE RIGHT!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

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DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.

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Monday Night Raw #1136, March 2, 2015!!!

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The Infamous Informer

I wanna give a shout out to my Facebook friend Lesley Steelergirl a.k.a. WuSteelah for tagging me in the House Party 90s mix on my Facebook page… back then, you needed to learn to dance. No holding a beer and acting a fool to these classics!!!

Before I move on let me put y’all wrestling jabronies at ease. Jon Stewart is NOT gonna fight Seth Rollins at WrestleMania…dunno where y’all got the idea from fool!

Plus: #FCUKDIRTSHEETS! They are the devil. They are designed to make you moan and b!tch over WrestleMania.

Plus: Quit all this Brock Lesnar talk. It is all swerves (probably by WWE themselves to make you take your mind off the main event and show how gullible you are.

With all that said…Let’s do this sh!t! RAW #1136, HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZ14,781 cats on deck this week!!!! New Jersey represent!!!

See Seth Rollins be talking sh!t about beating down Jon Stewart… INJUSTICE!!! Roman Reigns must come down the stairs!!!! All the ladies trying to touch him up, hoping to grope his front!!!! (Nicola Box I see you!!!)

Ha ha Don’t give me joke Rollins! You would what? Out rap Wiz Khalifa??? You probably can! Wiz Khalifa is WACK!!!

WTF? Am I hearing CM P**K chants in the building???? Ok all 14,781 of you are all B!TCHES!!!!

…and Dean F**k!n Ambrose is still walking round with the Intercontinental Title!!!! I wonder, did he put it in the fridge at home??? Wade Barrett – what sort of champ are you if you can’t look after your tingz? You can’t even handle Alicia Fox, let alone title!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

I know Seth did not tell Randall that he can out wrestle ANYONE on the WWE roster….. Right calling it now – Randall wins at WrestleMania by simply – out wrestling Rollins… Rollins could possibly cash his cheque for real!

Looks like the trend #GiveTruthAChance has worked! R-Truth is now in the Intercontinental Ladder Match at WrestleMania! This match right here, I can’t call, and that’s how I like my WrestleMania matches…

Sounds like Luke Harper wants in!!! He took off with the Intercontinental title!!! He can’t do that!!! And Shadfather, that is not a distraction roll up… they must have listened to you man! Ambrose took advantage of the distraction, Dirty Deeds to Barrett – BLAOW!!!

OH SNAP!!!!! Sandow just shut the Miz down!!! The Miz stars in the latest commercial – Niagra! You know what that is? A product that helps erectile dysfunction! Oh my days – shamed in front of Summer Rae, Paige, Cameron and others!!!! That ain’t PG surely!!!! Maryse can you confirm this???? The Miz can’t put in work????? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Ha! The New face of fear???? I don’t fear that fool with a lantern??? I don’t follow the buzzards??? I’m not down with that sh!t!

I like Wyatt’s leather jacket though! Watch da ryde – this is gonna be a casket match…. remember I told ya…

So is that how it goes down? You gonna set the casket on fire??? If you ask me Undertaker’s making you look like a fool right now! He’s just ignoring yo’ @$$! You’re playing yourself homie! It’s like Jay-Z responding to all these other idiots… you only get half a bar…. F**K Y’ALL N!&&@$!

STC WRESTLEMANIA 31 SIGN BDSIR

I was wondering when this match was gonna happen….Usos & Naomi Vs Cesaro/Tyson & Natalya!!!!

John Cena has gone on record and said that Cesaro is underrated….interesting!

Why would Tyson Kidd tag in his injured wife? That wasn’t very smart! My girl Naomi gets the win – that’s what’s up!!!!

#NaomiMatters

Whoa Whoa Whoa wait a minute – Cena – you can’t enter the André The Giant Battle Royal???? Oh boy the Anti-Cenation ain’t gonna like that! Even Stephanie thought – has this man watched the news??? Holy sh!t Stephanie just put Cena on blast and the fans love it!!!!! Now AxelMania wants in the battle royal? WHOA!!! He could win! Crowd chanting AxelMania! Maybe Axel not being in the Rumble, must have been a blessing! Oh snap – Curtis Axel ripped his shirt!!! I wonder what Hogan must be thinking? Cena has warned Axel… he’s gonna f**k him up! Or to put it in Wrestling nerd terms, he’s gonna ‘bury’ Axel!!! I’d never thought I’d say this but…COME ON AXEL!!!! This could be a Cena/Angle moment from 2002!

GOD DAMNIT!!!! Axel you couldn’t do better than that????

Hold up – Rusev is here! Will he change his mind about challenging Cena??? Uh oh don’t chant USA-USA-USA! Now look what you 14,781 jabronies have done… Rusev says NO!

Just for the record, The WrestleMania theme tune is WACK!!!! David Guetta f**kouttahere!

But now time for Triple Teef to say his usual ‘I am the game-errrr…’ ‘Sting is not ready-errrrr…’ ‘ it took him 14 years – errrrrr!!!!’GRANT BODY THRONE - P

Uh-oh, what does Triple want with Booker-T? Oh man Wrestlemania XIX… brings back horrible memories….

OH SH!T!!!!! Triple put the IWC on blast again!!! MAXIMUM POINTS TRIPLE! Don’t ruin it now….

MUTHAF***A…. He fired Booker-T???? The day after his birthday? THAT’S F**KED UP…

Thank god Triple was f**k!n with Booker…. you get your points back…

Divas title jump off!!!! Paige Vs Nikki Bella…. still backing the full-bodied gold digger here!

I mean, look at Nikki’s skin tone… I don’t understand how you guys love Paige? Milk of Magnesia NO THANK YOU!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Dayum Nikki pulled off the Alabama Slam? Nikki gets maximum props from me, I think… spinebuster???? Seriously I think Nikki’s wrestling skills have surpassed that of Brie!

TEEEEEEEEEF!! Paige had the match won! She had the PTO submission super move! Brie Bella putting the boots on Paige! Next minute AJ Lee comes out!!!! She still got beef with the Bellas! WROOOOY! 14,781 on their feet! Chanting CM P**K…. Ok I’m DUN. NEW JERSEY YOU ARE DICK-RIDING B!TCHES. Get em Vince…..

OH NO NOT THE DAILY SHOW WITH SETH ROLLINS?!!! This is bound to be funny!

Thank you stupid stream, I missed half that sh!t… but Jon Stewart is here! I pay £9.99 for this WWE Network – why can’t they put RAW on there???

Seth Rollins daily show

Damn First Stephanie, now Jon Stewart put Seth Rollins on BLAST! Told him about himself! That he’s wack! He doesn’t earn sh!t like Bruno, Gorilla Monsoon, Undertaker! The Money Inna Bank briefcase – he didn’t earn that sh!t! WHOA!!! Rollins can’t take the pressure! tries to beat him up… but he kicks him in his tools! Jon Stewart hung out with the Wu-Tang Clan… He ain’t sweating no Rollins!

So basically this Intercontinental storyline… the guys involved are in turn stealing Barrett’s title… looks like Danny might want in as well…. but silence… the latest HOF inductee…

Madusa Alundra Blayze

Dayum Alundra/Madusa! I have a weakness for legs… see? Vincent Kennedy is a forgiving man, she dashed the women’s title in the bin at WCW and still inducted her… he’s a good man!

51 years old…. I’d still hit that!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Paul Heyman – YOU ARE THE F**K!N MAN – OK!!!! Lesnar rumours SHUT DOWN ONE TIME – See that’s why I can’t stand wrestling fans because like Triple H said – y’all think you know everything but really you don’t know SH!T!!!!

Paul’s promo was so don, that the mic died 3 times over…. why doesn’t Heyman get nominated for best mic skills? Sorry Bray, you can’t test him!

Paul brought up that word again – EMASCULATED!!!! I don’t think Roman Reigns is like John Cena at Summerslam! He ain’t gonna let Lesnar suplex him 16 times!

…and as usual, Seth Rollins is here taking on Roman Reigns, Rollins got his peoples behind him… so TEEF! OH SNAP!!! Randall Teef Orton is here!!!! Who the viper gonna strike first?

Randall is just relaxing over the other side of the ring! Without a care in the world like – I’m just here to read the comments on some Michael Jackson popcorn sh!t…

Or maybe not! Randall cost Reigns the match! But that only angered Reigns as he took the whole authority! Spears left and right! Haters admitting that was a good spear… that’s because you were supporting Reigns in the beginning in the Shield days you fickle dickhead!

Notice – Reigns destroyed everyone except Orton… Orton is like – All the pieces are in place and it’s my game… because that’s what it is!

Stars of this week – Stephanie, Jon Stewart and Paul Heyman…. the way they put their targets on blast was incredible….

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

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Monday Night Raw #1124, December 8, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer

cm-punk-ufc

It’s the image that shocked the world, broke the internet, got muthaf***az bussin a nut.. wait a minute… This is the THIRD TIME I’m starting the blog off this week! To me it’s like, every time WWE pulls off something controversial, this guy pictured above steals their spotlight. Now he’s a UFC fighter… I wanna know how my people at Cage Amateurs UK think about all this… mixed opinions across the board, personally I think Philip will actually do better than the nay-sayers are thinking and get this – those nay-sayers are CM P**K worshippers!!! they have turned their back! You see me? I’m a Rock fan… when he moved into movies I still supported him and he is still the man, OK! When Brock had his UFC time in there, I supported him. Even though he broke my dude’s streak, he’s still the man… OK!!!! Whatever happened to loyalty?

SLAMMY AWARDS!!! If you didn’t vote on the WWE App, You can’t say sh!t!!! RAW, 1124, HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZBig ups to Seth Green! You know why? He just put all the other garbage awards on blast! They all phony, they are all pre-determined and sh!t… we know FULL WELL Iggy Azazel could never win best Hip Hop Artist?????!!!!

Damn look how little Seth is to Miz & MizDow!!! Ha! Enough of that sh!t… who gets the THIS IS AWESOME! award??? We find out after Dolph Ziggler Vs Seth Rollins!

At the TLCS PPV joint, Ziggler faces Luke Harper for the Intercontinental Title in a Ladder match… that will be an exciting contest.. Ziggler has earned my respect, but F**K DOLPH ZIGGLER!!! Backing Luke Harper all the way son!

YES Rollins! Curb stomp that b!tch into the canvas!!! It doesn’t change the fact that I don’t like his @$$!

Sting wins the award! Let’s be real he turned the internet upside down! that is until CM B!TCH decided to speak out… attention seeking B!TCH!!!!

Wait a minute – Seth Rollins – you can’t accept that award in Sting’s absence???? (I think you’ll find he can Grant…) Him too outta orda & bright!

Side Note – Seth – I still can’t ‘hate’ you…. you supposed to be the top heel and I can’t hate you… DAMN!

Earlier Slammy Awards: The Rock won insult of the year (when he dissed Lana), The Usos won Tag Team of the year, Dean Ambrose won best breakout star, hashtag of the year – #RKOouttanowhere and Fan participation – goes to ‘You Sold Out’ to Seth Rollins… can’t argue with those apart from the last one – every time the Authority came out or AJ Lee would fight the crowd would take their d!cks out, start wanking as they cry – ‘CM P**K!’

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Oh snap – the New Day beat Dust2Dust??? BRILLIANT!!! Wait a minute – not John Meningitis???!! NO!!!!!!! Ok who won Shocking Return of The Year???

Well we know who WON’T be winning…. my good Wu-Tang friend – Batista! Y’all hating… thank god I’m not like you!!! Look at Batista now – starred in one of the blockbusters of the year and now him dep pon the new James Bond Joint…. when I play this video below, I am sure Batista will approve…

Laugh at them Batista! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! HAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!

YES…. my dude, my first hero The Ultimate Warrior wins the award…. rightfully deserved!

Wise words from Paul Heyman to Seth Rollins: You wanna be the future? F**K UP JOHN CENA!!!

WORRRRRD!!! Charlotte dep pon Raw???? WICKED!!!! Where’s the cocoa butter… (Sorry Ric!!!)

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GRANT BODY – P!!!

I see the science though, promoting that NXT R-EVOLUTION sh!t this Thursday!!! I’ll be on that no doubt!!!!

I know y’all hate that show, but I’d love to see Charlotte on Total Divas…. that way we see Ric Flair n!**@!!!

Nah f**k that – we need a tribute song for Charlotte! You think Charlotte could make it to be 16 time Women’s champion??? OH SNAP – Natalya beat Charlotte????!!! WHOA! Er…

Ok here we go – OMG moment of the year… I know where this is going… I’m ok don’t worry…

Well it was no surprise! The 1 behind the 1 in 21&1 claims that award…. DAMN YOU HEYMAN!!!! DAMN YOU TO HELL!!! Ok I’m alright now…

Oh lawwd I never clocked it from last week!!!! Ambrose destroyed the rocking chair????? HE’S DUN IT NOW!!!!! Dayuuum that’s what Bray Wyatt did in retaliation on SmackDown??? F**ked up the throat of Ambrose with the chair? Imagine if this was TV-14 mode…. good gawd almighty…

STC TLCS

Out of Darkness, cometh light… in the form of Dean Ambrose out of an ambulance???? OH SNAP!! So er.. what does this mean??? Does the loser leave in an ambulance on some TLC Ambulance match sh!t???? Please WWE make this sh!t happen!

It’s only right that the original dutty bwoy gets to present the Diva Slammy award… Well I know who won’t win… my bamboo Layla… but that’s ok, I don’t complain on the internet and I don’t lock myself in a basement…I don’t smell of bad odour…

YES!!! AJ Lee wins diva of the year!!!! I cam run with that!!!! RESPECT!!! Oh dear the Bellas and Paige are bex about it! To that the GRANT SAYS THIS: Paige – SHUDDUP!SAM_3845 Brie – STOP YOUR NOISE! Nikki – TAKE OFF YOUR TINGZ!!! You wanna baby? Taste my super sperm!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Oh snap!!!! Luke Harper Vs Eric Rowan in singles competition??? This should be good!

I can’t help feeling that these two are merely sparring with each other… like you can’t see any intensity with this sh!t… at the same time they are not afraid to destroy each other for no reason!

Ok this LOL award… it ain’t gonna be in my taste… personally I think when Triple TEEF was singing Another One Bites the Dust to Cena… ok the mother’s day shout out from MR.T was a good one…

Or the princess pudding – yeah that one gotta win! Vickie & Steph throwing themselves in the soup… that was brilliant! hated Vickie but to see Steph like that – OHHHHHH!!! Remind me to buy the Stephanie McMahon Fitness DVD for my fam for Christmas… I can tuck into my mince pies watching that sh!t!!! OH YEAH!!!

Mizdow wins!!! Well ok I give him props! The creativity and energy behind that sh!t… wait there – The Miz can’t accept the award??? OUTTA ORDER & BRIGHT!

I think Lana should get the ‘every man wants to f**k her’ award… F**K that – she should get the ‘every woman wants to get a strap-on and f**k her award!!!’ That includes the straight women!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Shout out to the Shield – Best faction, Danny Bryan Vs The Authority – Best Feud, yes it was emotional still…. that TRIPLE TEEEEEEEEF!!!!! Danny & Brie gets best couple… I gotta agree there! Then again there is me & Layla…

TLC Kick off – New Day Vs Dust2Dust… backing New Day ALL DAY!

Here’s my latest hero! Ryback!!! Respect to that man! People get hurt in wrestling – it is what it is… Ryback threw CM B!tch through a table… BIG DEAL! You don’t know pain??!!! The Undertaker, threw Mankind off the top of the cell, chokeslammed him through the cell onto the canvas, worse than that, Terry Funk got chokeslammed out of his smelly trainers… until you experience that… SHUDDUP B!ATCH!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Shout out to JAY-BEE – he acknowledged Vincent Kennedy’s hit song – STAND BACK! I think that should be re-released for Christmas #1… do you know how many downloads that would get on iTunes??!!!!

WHAAAAAAAT!!! Ricky ‘The Dragon’ Steamboat to present the Match Of the Year award? I say Seth Rollins Vs Dean Ambrose Hell In A Cell… but I never voted on the WWE App… so lets see what they got…

WORRRRD!!! Team Cena Vs Team Authority won the award!!!! I can’t front – that match was don!!! Ziggler takes the award…F**K Ziggler – Sting should take that sh!t! He shut down the authority! Ziggler didn’t do sh!t!

Summer Rae is obviously bex she didn’t win diva of the year… well firstly Summer, you don’t teef next gyal boyfriend! two, you don’t disrespect Natalya at her own yard! And three, you don’t d!ck tease Fandango! Four, you ain’t even that nice!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Good to see Rob Van Dam in the hiz-house!!! Let’s see who wins the Extreme moment of the year!

Brock Lesnar gotta win this surely!!! He f**ked up John Cena big time! Saying that… My hero Kane did drop three tombstones to Danny Bryan and f**ked up his neck…

Rock-stone!!! Chris Jericho wins! the cross body off the top of the cage to Bray Wyatt!!! Props to Jericho! I disagree but hey… I didn’t vote so therefore… – wait a minute – Fandango – you can’t accept the award – where you going???!!!

Trust my stupid @$$ laptop to crash on me… it was a slow @$$ process to get back in it… to discover that Roman Reigns has won Superstar of the Year??!!! WHOA!! I bet the IWC are up in a frenzy here… just remember you b!tch @$$ low-lifes without the benefit of intellect, you didn’t vote on your muthaf***!ng WWE app, so shut the F**K UP!!!!

Since I’ve seen Big Show Vs Cena like 400 times, I wasn’t tryna watch this sh!t again… but what happened at the end was the Team Cena Vs Team Authority sh!t…. this time with Tables, Ladders, Chairs & Stairs! Ruckus all over the place including the Big Show punching Ziggler & Cena through school buses, Ryback dropping meat hook clotheslines, then Seth Rollins and his stooges dropping the triple powerbomb to Cena through the table – BLAOW!!! even Triple & Steph had to stop halfway through intercourse to watch that sh!t!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

OFFICIAL STC THEME FOR WWE TLCS PPV: WU-TANG CLAN – Hold the Heater

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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Monday Night Raw #1123, December 1, 2014!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw

Monday Night Raw #1123, December 1, 2014!!!

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It’s the image that shocked the world, broke the internet, got muthaf***az bussin a nut.. wait a minute… didn’t I start last week’s blog like this? It matters not! CM P**K, YOUR SAVIOR (He ain’t mine) finally broke his silence! He said a lot of things, and no doubt, it will impact this weeks RAW! Expect a lot of CM P**K chants loud as f**k… expect the laptop GM to be booed out of the building… can we get a surprise appearance by Edge to break that muthaf***a? Make no mistake: This week should be an explosive one…

IT’S CLOBBERING TIME!!! RAW, 1123, HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZ…and here we go, Michael Cole under the orders of the laptop talking sh!t… Has Cena come out to break the laptop??? I hope so! This is your chance to get cheered for once fool!

Somebody got a ‘Staph infection sign’!!! Making reference to the CM P**k podcast… expect that to be confiscated…. god damn that muthaf***!n lap top – Cena break that sh!t! Stop chatting! Thank god Cena sorted that sh!t! Just close that blasted thing! That’s what I do when jabronies come up in my Fb inbox!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Seth Rollins: Who’s next to take over RAW? JBL? Ha! the fans like that idea! Batista… not so much… Eric Bischoff…. well he was entertaining still I can’t lie!

Will it bunn Rollins to ask Cena nicely to bring back the Authority? If I was Cena I’d tell Rollins to join the Cena kiss my bl- er I mean white @$$ club! Hang on – that lap top is still working???

Seth Rollins Vs John Cena Tables match at the TLC joint – if Cena loses, he can forget about fighting Brock Lesnar at the Royal Rumble! I LIKE THAT!!! Come on Seth!!! (We know that ain’t happening!)

RUCKUS IN DI DANCE! Seth and the stooges attack Cena, Ryback joins the ruckus! I’m surprise the crowd didn’t boo him for you know… CM P**k reasons… Glenn shows up in his Sunday School Trousers, Eric Rowan takes off his buzzard mask ready to throw fists and kicks, Bi-Polar Show intervenes with his dry self and punches Cena through school buses, Luke Harper gets involved… it all ends with Seth Rollins powerbombing Cena through a table – BLAOW!!!! THAT’S AN OPENING! GREAT START GUYS!

Tag Team Turmoil jump off! Winner fights the tag team champions Miz & Mizdow! Oh snap it’s the NEW DAY!!! They are all about A Better Tomorrow!

Remind me to do some sort of modifications on WWE2K15 to make The New Day official! I’d rather like the name – Black Men United – but I’m just a fan… what do I know?

Oh ny god no… Adam Rose & the Bunny are a team? Can you imagine if they become the #1 contenders??? That would be f**ked up!!!

Thank god that’s not the case! Usos are the #1 contenders! Anyway enough of that sh!t!!!!

Wait a minute – what do Miz & Mizdow want with Naomi??? I know she sexy as f**k but….they want her to join Hollywood??? I gotta raise the people’s eyebrow here!

Look who pulled up in the limo! VINCENT KENNEDY!!! UH OH!!! Somebody’s in trouble!!!!

Slammy awards next week!!! Hosted by Seth Green??? I don’t know that fool! This only means one thing… it’s about that time to present the annual STC awards! More details on the FB group – http://www.facebook.com/groups/smacktalkcentre – request to join – DON’T BE A WEIRDO!

Follow us pon di twitta – @stc_wwe! That’s how the f**k we roll!!!

Back to the action – I think Bi-Polar Show just hit Eric Rowan in the back with the steel steps – BLAOW!!!

Right kiddies! Who do you want to partner with AJ Lee? Alicia Fox, Natalya or my choice – Naomi? Use that WWE App on your HiPhone6! Truth be told I would choose all 3 because my love for women is untold, but I bet those IWC B!tches would try to vote for CM P**K… hahaha get off his d!ck!!! Do you know that there are actually jabronies out there who think this podcast sh!t is a work? Shows how deluded CM P**K worshippers really are – GET IN THE CHAIR!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

F**K me that Rosa Mendes can dance!!! All that Spanish fly Rhumba sh!t… if Fandango ain’t getting in that pu$$y he’s truly a battyman!

Hol on – what happened to Wack Swagger? did he get deported??? Nah – turns out Zeb Colter’s leg got f**ked up!!!! Oh seen!!! I get it now! I think Rusev did it!

I have to confirm the rumours – I am not human…. I have to hold my sack and fix my trousers every time Lana says – SHUT-TUP!! God damn I wanna ramm my cocky up her ‘Putin’!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Say what? Is Sandow THAT over that WWEshop.com have now put the stunt tag titles on for sale?! Them sh!ts gonna sell more than the Tag Team Titles???

OH SNAP! Mizdow won using the Figure 4 Leg Lock!!! Actually f**k that – My Uso brudda just slapped up The Miz in his money-maker! STAY AWAY FROM MY WIFE!!! I agree! It kinda reminds me of that storyline when Kurt Angle wanted to put it in Booker T’s wife….

kurt-angle-sharmell

The question remains – is Dean Ambrose Vs Bray Wyatt (TLC match) gonna be the main event? Or is it gonna be Seth Rollins Vs John Cena (Tables match)???? Remember I told ya, it will be under scrutiny by the Internet Wrestling B!tches…

Talking of b!tches… here are some that I like to see on the telly: The Bella twins! I just wanna know who is gonna team up with AJ… sorry guys it’s not Paige… I still don’t see the fascination… I’m sorry! To flip this in the way how The Rock said it: Grant Body P

So let me get this straight, we go from the powerful Trish Stratus, to the thong song wearing Lita, to the leggy Stacy Keibler, to the Sultry Melina… to my baby mother Layla… all the way to…….. PAIGE???

That’s what’s up! come in Naomi!!! Shake dat @$$! WATCH YOURSELF!!!

I was wondering when those CM P**K chants would kick in….

Thank goodness for the fans who actually have sense and chant AJ Lee… the others are GAY! Maybe the fans who have sense are fed up with the worshippers…

So suppose Cena loses that match at TLC (which he won’t), who does become the #1 contender? In fact f**k that – Paul Heyman counters the IWC’s b!tch @$$ ways… Brock Lesnar is must see!!!! If he was there every week he wouldn’t mean sh!t! In fact – Don’t blame Brock – don’t blame WWE – BLAME YOURSELVES!!! YOU are the ones who wanted Brock to become champion, but when this wise man here tried to tell y’all pizza eating morons that Brock wouldn’t be there every week you thought I was talking sh!t because I don’t read the muthaf***!n dirt sheets… unlike you jabronies I use the benefit of intellect…trying to reason with you is like arguments with your woman – Even if you make sense the woman always thinks she’s right… was I being sexist just now? You DAMN RIGHT!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

So if this six man tag team match is the main event… does this mean Vincent Kennedy got the last segment? UH -OH!!!!

The answer is No but Raw ends as it pretty much began… Cena’s team – or should I say Ziggler’s team – wins the match, but Bi-Polar Show just had to get involved didn’t he? F**k all that – check it – Now they calling Erick Rowan ‘Big Red’??? You see Glenn, f**k around and next man takes your name…. and guess what else – we’re not gonna hear from that stupid laptop either… all that guessing sh!t you was doing… you wonder why I didn’t partake – simply put – IT’S STUPIDNESS!!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

FOLLOW SMACK TALK CENTRE ON TWITTER

DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.

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