Smack Talk Centre-Raw
I stand before you a damned fool… I usually do the knowledge on a lot of sh!t, but not this Ice Bucket challenge sh!t… I understand that it’s for a cause, but ask yourself: Is the money REALLY going there? Why did we not think of those in third world countries who are dying for a drop of water? Why did Band Aid make that song 30 years ago, and up-til now the kids are STILL starving? Why did I engage in an activity that my ancestors were subject to torture? I can’t hold myself completely accountable…since my favourite celebrities did the same thing. Don’t get me wrong – I loved watching y’all do the challenge online (especially some of the women on my FB list… GOD DAYUUUM!) If the money goes to the cause, fair play… but if not, and there’s no true cure for cancer, and the kids in third world countries are still to be fed…
I AM THE INFAMOUS INFORMER, WOLVERHAMPTON’S LAST OUTLAW, GRANTINGTON STEELE – (That’s what happens if certain divas come near me not mentioning any names – (Layla) AND THIS IS THE RAW REVIEW BLOG! EPISODE #1109 – HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!
Word on the street is that Hulk Hogan, Ric Flair & Shawn Michaels is in the hiz-house!!! But why? It was Vincent Kennedy’s birthday on Sunday… Get this wrestling fans – Vincent Kennedy turns 70 NEXT YEAR – That day falls on a Monday, August 24…. just letting y’all know…
The first ever WWE Hall Of Fame Forum??? I’m sure they had one of these before that featured Booker-T & Bret Hart among others…. well anyway let’s see what this is saying…
They are gonna discuss John Cena Vs Brock Lesnar???? You know the conqueror is gonna show up… Hogan and Lesnar reportedly talking trash…
Dayuuum HBK doubts Cena! HBK thinks Cena might have to start considering retirement???? Surely not??!!! Ric Flair agrees with him!!! Dayum he’s not feeling it! Only Hogan thinks differently! Well he would, he’s all about hulking up on some bullsh!t and coming back with a leg drop…. Big ups to HBK and Flair, they keeps it real!
Cena – you said you gonna bring the fight to Brock! Last time you said that Brock German Suplexed your blodclart 16 times!
Forget David Vs Goliath… this is some Rocky Vs Drago sh!t!!!
Here’s another fool who thinks he can win against my newest hero Rusev!!! Swagger – IT’S OVER FOR YOU!!! last time you passed out to the Accolade super move… this time he’s gonna break your back and your neck! RUSEV – I’m not as attractive or as ravishing like Lana, but RUSEV – CRUSH!!!
YES JAY -BEE! You started the lyric game early! “Swagger needs to make amends! if he doesn’t he has to leave the country!” That only drives me to support Rusev even more!!!! Imagine that!!! that should be the stipulation right there!
I can’t lie – I thought Swagger had that much won when he got the patriot lock on Rusev. Rusev looked like he was gonna bite his own hand! NO RUSEV!!! Don’t let Vladimir Putin down!
Ha ha! I love that sh!t! Swagger screaming ‘We the People’ at Rusev, and before he could finish, Rusev kicks him down as if to say SHUDDUP!!! LET’S GO RUSEV!!! For me! For Putin! For the WORLD!!! And most importantly, for LANA! You want more of that sweet pu$$y don’t you???!!!
GRANT BODY – P!!!
YES!!!! RUSEV BEAT HIM DOWN!!!! STAMPED HIM OUT!!! Where’s the flag at? YES! That is REPRESENTING!
So nice for Bo Dallas to check in on Swagger while the doc is checking his ribs out… I mean he’s right, all he had to do was Bo-Lieve!
Here’s another case of whoever loses, I win! RVD Vs Cesaro – winner fights Sheamus for the US Title at Night of Champions… I like all three guys so it should be a great contest come the PPV…
..and even though Cesaro vs Sheamus will be a great match… can’t help but feel that WWE dropped the ball here…it’s time for Rusev to go against the US champion… then you couldn’t call a champion!!! Rusev is undefeated!!! Or are they going to save that til a future PPV like say I dunno…. Survivor Series???
Right for all you jabronies who are wondering what’s the point watching Raw if Ambrose is not on tonight, here’s an answer… Paige Vs Natalya! I am SO FEELING Natalya’s attire, shows off her sexy thighs…. dayum girl!
JAY-BEE YOU DID IT AGAIN! ” Can you imagine if Natalya has to tap out to her own move? She’d be thrown out of Canada!”
Well Natalya won’t be thrown out of Canada… but she lost to Paige’s supermove – The Paige Turn… but forget all that – What the deal with AJ Lee??? Hugged up Paige and called her – her English Muffin??? Took her hand and kissed her? Damnit why doesn’t these two just get it over with and get some scissor action going???
GRANT BODY – P!!!
Wait a minute – a eulogy for Dean Ambrose???? JAY BEE is killing me today! He says he’s gonna miss him! Look at Kane and Seth Rollins dressed in black! Yo Kane! Where the casket at? Oh yeah – last time you f**ked around with a casket your brother f**ked your head up!
I have a question Rollins: How are you gonna blame US – The WWE Universe for choosing the stipulation when they were all the same sh!t last week??? Falls Count Anywhere/No DQ/No Holds Barred = ALL THE SAME SH!T!
Ok Rollins you destroyed the Shield…. INJUSTICE! Roman Reigns is coming down the stairs! Kane & Rollins cannot handle the Rage of Reigns!
Right you IWC B!tches it is clear that Reigns is feuding with the whole authoritaah! One by one, until he faces Triple Teef. After that, he will send for the Rumble and win that mofo, go to WrestleMania and become…. CHAMPION! But here’s the twist – Brock WILL NOT be the opponent… you know why??? Because of one Dwayne Johnson… You forget Vincent Kennedy wants that money match for WrestleMania 31… He wants Brock Vs Rock II. Roman will most likely fight whoever the champion is by then. Will Sting fight Undertaker? Time will tell. Why is Hogan in training? He hinted at Cena… remember the words of the Infamous Informer… I have just predicted 4 matches right there!
Ok we gonna get a tag team championship match that I felt should have waited til Night of Champions but…. I’m gonna go with WWE’s madness and see where this goes… The USO Brudda! The Dust Brudda! LET’S GO!
Oh no! They went USO crazy! But did they fake that knee injury to get themselves disqualified? And if they did, Was that a ‘heel turn’ by The Dust Brudda??? Beating down the USO brudda like that??? Answers on a postcard please! Or holla at us at the WWE smack talk centre – http://www.facebook.com/groups/smacktalkcentre – Request to join – DON’T BE A WEIRDO!
ANOTHER AWARD WINNING INTERVIEW PROMO FROM BRRROCCCK LESSSNAR!!!! He’s basically saying that for 12 years Cena was only the man because Brock went on to conquer other sh!t, which he did…he claims that Night of Champions will be Cena’s LAST NIGHT! Oh man!!!! As an Undertaker fan, I don’t feel so bad anymore, even though I’m over the streak thing!
Oh f**k… Miz & Ziggler are on… this is the part where I go to the toilet… I don’t even need the toilet – I’m gonna switch on my PS3 and have a quick game of Soul Calibur…
Say what? Damien Mizdow? The Miz’s stunt double???? Lawd have mercy – let me hit the PS3 switch…
In fact f**k that – let me see my favourite Ice Bucket challenge…. I got a bit of a Soul Calibur going on in my pants watching this!
GRANT BODY – P!!!
Looks like my Soul Calibur is gonna stand at attention because now the Bella Twins are in the ring… and if Nikki Bella ‘hates’ her sister, shouldn’t she change her music???
Jerry Lawler is gonna see if he can reconcile the two… more like get a Bella sandwich!!!! DUTTY BWOY!!!
Oh snap – she just took a shot at the guys that can’t get any pu$$y! Taking shots at Danny! Jerry Lawler!!! I thought Summerslam was time of the month but now she wished death in the womb! Dayuum she assaulting Brie! I see you wrestling dorks hoping for a wardrobe malfunction and got your Sky Boxes hoping to hit pause if you catch a glimpse of Nikki’s panties! Ha! Your eyes have to be razor-sharp like mine hahaaha! I’ll be looking forward to your saddo Sky pause screen shots on Facebook!
GRANT BODY – P!!!
Get it over with Bella Twins give the fans what they want – a good ol’ bra & panties match! (Calm down Edmund Mulhall!)
Oh man don’t tell me Kane is gonna fight in his school trousers again…. the new school term starts in two weeks! If he splits his trousers… oh boy oh boy!
Handicap match! Ka – f**k that – I’m calling him Glenn from now on… My hero Kane wears a mask and tombstones priests and sets people pon fire! This guy with Seth Rollins fighting Roman Reigns? His name is GLENN!
Clearly these guys are not here to win the match – they are here to f**k up Reigns! NO – WAY – I know they didn’t send for the cinder blocks again to drive Reigns head top through them like they did Ambrose… luckily for Reigns he had strength to fight off Rollins and Glenn!
I like how JAY-BEE & Jerry Lawler are arguing about the actions of Rollins & Reigns, Michael Cole stays out of it and then cuts in to talk about the WWE Network which 170 countries can get for $9.99! Great commentating guys!
Ok, Kofi Kingston is in the ring… time to pay attention. We gonna find out the truth if this ‘Black Men United’ faction will manifest or if it has disbanded like the dirt sheets say and you jabronies read and Bo-lieve…
Talking of Bo-Lieve, why did Swagger attack Bo Dallas for??? All Bo Dallas did was give words of inspiration…Sore loser…
Right we gonna see if Cena’s fighting style has cracks in it after that beatdown by Lesnar… don’t worry Cena – Bray Wyatt cannot drop 16 suplexes on yo’ @$$!
Wait a minute – is John Cena dropping suplexes on Wyatt??? Rude boy – he’s sending messages to Lesnar here! I wonder – is Cena gonna rise like the Undertaker and stick his tongue out???
Well Cena didn’t make it to 16 – The Wyatt man dem clocked on and shut that down quick! Hol on a minute playas! This ain’t Teddy Long but The Grant says watch this become a six man tag team match… because Big Show and my hero Mark Henry have got involved!
Ok let’s look at it on the real… Can Cena execute 16 suplexes? Or can Wyatt take that punishment? So basically they styled it out???
The authority made it a 6-man tag team match… did they really? I don’t remember seeing Triple Teef or Stephanie’s sexy @$$ there??!!! Unless it was Glenn who issued it… let me check their twitter real quick… in fact f**k that – it’s not important!
Wow! Cena came different yo! He didn’t send for his 5 moves of doom…but he dropped those Supermoves on all the Wyatt’s @$$£$! Well you gotta give the kids hope! Restore their faith in their hero!
IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!
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DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.