Tag Archives: STC

Monday Night Raw #1140, March 30, 2015!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw

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The Infamous Informer

Last night I cried Tears Of Joy, What did I do to deserve this?

I’m the Infamous Informer, and I have NO sympathy, NO compassion, NO remorse…welcome to the RAW After Big BIG WrestleMania… can you believe that after the best WrestleMania since X-Seven, we still had grumpy muthaf***az pointing out flaws… you know what, hand in your muthaf***!n WWE card, OK? You not down with the team, and you are only proving to me that it was all about the muthaf***!n attitude era. Sit over there, and watch your Peter Handre bullsh!t on ITV2… you are nothing but a B!TCH!!!

RAW AFTER MANIA: HOL’DAT BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZLet’s start the WrestleMania 32 cycle right!

OOOOHHHHH SH!!!!!T!!!! This man can’t be happy… Brock Lesnar with no title round his waist…. Yo Seth, RUN FOR THE HILLS!

Paul Heyman doesn’t look happy either….

And the crowd chanting SUPLEX CITY!!!! Come on WWE get those merchandising set up! SUPLEX CITY B!TCH!! Do you know how much revenue WWE would make off that alone?

No Heyman! You can’t do that! You would lose a court case on that WWE title sh!t!!! Seth was within his rights to cash his cheque! It was within the one year clause!

Hi Steph! How’s your arm baby girl??? Why is the crowd chanting Ronda Rousey??? HAHAHA! Oh good counter by Stephanie using tricknology to the crowd!

OOOOOH SH!!!!!T! Brock Lesnar is fighting on RAW!!!! Seth, I’m gonna pray for ya….

Dolph Ziggler Vs Danny Bryan for the wrestling fans favourite championship! The same championship STC’s Shadfather calls ‘cursed’!!!!

Great contest! Danny gets the win, HOL’ON! Sheamus is back!! Look at his headtop! Ginger mohawk, beard twiss up, kicking down Dolph & Danny!!!! Why y’all booing? That’s what you wanted right? For Sheamus to turn evil because he went stale???! Gotta rate the crowd though: “YOU LOOK STUPID!!!” I gotta agree! He looks stupid….in a badass way!!!

Hold up – the Lucha Dragons from NXT reppin on RAW???? HELL YEAH THAT IS DAN!!!!!

They are twisting up Cesaro and Kidd! They can’t manage them! They had to retreat one time! Now the crowd chanting ‘New Day Sucks’! OH NO!!!! This is bad! Well not that bad – New Day are being chanted! But there is a solution! #BlackWrestlersMatter

Big up New Day & the Lucha Dragons! Took out the Ascension! They might as well change their name to the Descension because these guys are going down and that’s not cool!

Now they showing vignettes for the kid call Adrian Neville? Ha! new season, new road to WrestleMania 32, and muthaf***az could be future endeavoured!

OH SH!T – Brock just heard Seth Rollins is in the hiz-house…. oh lawd have mercy, I’ma open up my rap bible, and the light will come over the children….

Big up Seth Rollins though, he’s here to compete… a fighting champion!!!! You can’t knock that! Can he send Brock for the Tandem Engine???

Hold on… Rollins is jet lagged? His feet hurt? Oh boy he can see Lesnar is BEX! Seth took my advice! He ran for the hills! J&J security got clotheslined out of their suits! Lesnar pushed over the announce table! JAY-BEE & Booker-T mash-up! Grabs Mike Cole! F5 into the canvas – BLAOW! Grabs the cameraman, Stephanie’s attempt to stop him failed! F5 to the cameraman – BLAOW!!!

OH MY GOD THAT’S ENOUGH!!! THAT MAN HAS A FAMILY DAMNIT!!!

Lesnar suspended indefinitely…. already? He just signed a new contract didn’t he??? OH DEAR!!!

Now we got no commentators! What are we gonna do now? Icy Fresh! Shadfather! Steadx! Get in there and take over!

Stephanie gonna fine him! NO! How is he gonna decorate the kitchen table? Sable can’t be too happy about this??? She gonna starve now!

Damn Bryon Saxton has to run tingz now, and Mizdow is out here on his own fighting Stardust…  You know The Miz gonna f**k this up right? With that I’m gonna find the big man room…

…or maybe not! He used the Miz’s supermove??? Bad mistake…. look who’s here, the @$$hole himself – the Miz…crowd chanting @$$hole! This will be a great compelling feud!

Is Curtis Axel still on this bullsh!t? Yo WrestleMania dun!!! Move on!!!

OH SH!!!!!!!T!!!! The man that gravity forgot! The man they call Neville!!!!! (so they dropped the ‘Adrian’ already…) wrestling fans shut the f**k up – he’s still the same NEVILLE!

Guess what… Cena has another new T-Shirt again!!!! God Damnit!!!! I wonder if the true Cena fans have every single shirt ever released? Cena got more T-shirts than Wu-Tang solo albums!!!

I guess the US Spinner title isn’t making a comeback….shame really…

Well it’s an open challenge! Who wants to test John Cena? Rusev? NOPE – Dean Ambrose!!!! I suppose he’s ready to do this considering he mashed up through those ladders at WrestleMania!

God bless Jerry Lawler… Bryon needed help, he can’t do this sh!t alone!

SPOILER ALERT – Cena wins! Still an awesome match, and a show of respect… fans don’t like that… the fans don’t like anything!!!

Now Seth Rollins has mouth now that Brock has gone to…. pay those bills so to speak…. but he must have forgotten about Randall… who actually brukk up his clart at WrestleMania! Clearly Seth ain’t tryna defend his title… fighting champion my crusty foot bottom! Glenn & Big Show got Rollins back… who Randall gonna send foGrant Body Pr? I can think of Roman… but the fans don’t like him (the fickle idiots…) or what about… oh f**k that – the divas are on!

Well f**k you stupid stream… even you don’t know #AWomansWorth… the stupid sh!t had to freeze up and I missed the match…. had to restart this sh!t – nah they need to put Raw on the muthaf***k!n Network!

Considering this is the RAW after Mania it hasn’t been as good as previous Raw after Mania episodes… at the same time I like that because it’s a slap in the face of the IWC who have a kick out of trashing the biggest show and then looking forward to the Raw after… on that note – f**k you Heelbook… you sons of b!tches!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Word is Randall got Ryback in his team… the other gotta be Roman Reigns surely!

Note to fans – just because you hate Roman Reigns – don’t get in his face on some bullsh!t – if he pushes you one side – IT’S YOUR FAULT OK! Don’t be a d!ckhead!

Oh dear trouble at the STC – I had to sort out some admin business… so I missed the main event. But hold on!!! Sting is on the WWE Network!!!! OH SH!T…. if what I think happens… I’m gonna mark the f**k out!!!

Sting – I know you heard that chant!!!! Stop trippin!

What the hell is Mr Bo-Lieve doing here???? Dude you are asking for a scorpion death drop super move kid! Turn back!

Well that was disappointing!!! I mean Raw was good but man…. Lesson to be learned – stop taking the p!$$ out of the show of shows. That blasted in your face if you ask me….

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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The Infamous Informer

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www.cageamateursuk.com

DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.

Monday Night Raw #1106: August 4, 2014!!!

Smack Talk Centre Raw Logo

The Infamous Informer

Peace & Blessings Wrestling fans around the world! My Name is Michael Grant a.k.a. The Infamous Informer, a.k.a. The Man In The Purple Suit, a.k.a. the 1 behind the 1 in 17-1… when My Client, RRRRRRon Killings, Conquered the Bo Dallas streak last week on Raw!!!!

(BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!)

Boo me all you want but I each and every week I speak the truth to you deluded wrestling fools! CM P**k doesn’t wanna know, Dolph Ziggler is WACK and you stupid muthaf***as supported the excellent Guardians of the Galaxy after you run down Batista to the ground… how stupid and dumb do you look now??? You sneer and go to the toilet during diva matches like b!tches in a club doing their make up taking selfies and sh!t and now the most talked about match at Summerslam is Brie Bella Vs Stephanie McMahon…

WHO ARE THE IGNORANT FOOLS NOW???!!!

Now b!tch, get me my Real McCoy Man Crisps, my Aero mint chocolate, my Carte La’Dor Strawberry Ice Cream and my Jaffa Cakes, don’t forget my Pineapple & Grapefruit crush drink… sit down and SHUDDUP! RAW #1106! HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZBig ups to STC member James Patrick Park Jr. Live in effect at Raw this week but they took the Smack Talk Centre sign away from him???? WHAT SORT OF SH!T IS THAT??? The Smack Talk Centre must be too gangsta for the WWE!!! You f**k!n with the wrong n!**@ now WWE!

EVERY MEMBER OF THE STC PLEASE RISE, PUT YOUR HAND ON YOUR HEART AND SAY IT LOUD: WE THE STC!!!!

I wished I counted how many times this year Raw starts with the Authority coming out here… don’t get me wrong though… I love to see Stephanie’s sexy @$$… but it’s like 2000 when Triple used to come out talking sh!t like – ‘I AM THE GAME-ERRRRR…. I AM THE WWF CHAMPION-ERRRRR… And I AM THAT GOOD-ERRRRR!!!!’

What is this – a promo ramming the WWE Network down my neck back??? This a shot at the IWC – all 128,000 of em who withheld their sh!t after 6 months…

It’s also promoting the WWE Network going global after they clinched the deal with the Canadian Cable Company….

STEPHANIE… YOUR COWBOY BOOTS!!!! COME HERE GIRL RIDE THAT PONY!!!

And guys, you can catch Stephanie McMahon riding on Grantington Steele on the WWE Network for $9.99 (£6.71) a month!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

But according to Triple TEEF, you get to read on here about My hero Kane Vs Roman Reigns in a Last Man Standing Match for free!!!!!

If a steel chair is wedged between the turnbuckles, and Roman Reigns drives Kane headfirst into it… does that count as a chair shot to the head? ??? Hit me up on the TWITTAAAAR!!! @MZATheInfamous!!!

HERE WE GO!!! Roman Reigns has sent for the tables!!!! I hope Kane sets that sh!t pon FYYYYRRRRRRE!!!!

OH SNAP!!! Roman Reigns went for the Superman Punch, Kane with the sidestep – grabs him, Chokeslam through the table – BLAOW!!!!

Luckily for Reigns his SWAT gear cushioned some of that blow. Reigns able to recover, got the superman punch, ducks underneath Kane’s clothesline, comes off the ropes – SPEAR – BLAOW!!!! Kane tryna pull up with the ropes but it’s too late – 10 count!!!

Oh Kane….. I knew you should have set that muthaf***a on fire! Reigns would have lost for sure! Triple said he wanted to see the demon…. the demon got slayed yo!

Well if you wanna see tables set pon fyre you can see it pon de WWE Network, for $9.99 (£6.71)!!!

WHAT AN EPIC MMA/UFC STYLE PROMO PACKAGE BY BROCK LESNAR & JOHN CENA!!! But Brock said something that made me think – Yo WWE, you better rate this thing TV-14!!!! “I’m gonna leave John Cena in his own blood, urine & vomit…” Oh my god – OH… MY… GOD!!!!! (JR VOICE)

And if you wanna see the biggest fight of the summer then send for the WWE Network at only $9.99 (£6.71)!!!

Wait a minute…Sandow can’t come out to JR’s music????? After WWE treat him bad like that???? DISRESPECT!!!! Sandow you’re my dude but you gonna get buss arse for this surely!

OH SNAP!!!! HE WILL GET BUSS ARSE!!! MARK HENRY IN THE HIZ-HOOOUUUUUSEE! Bruk him up Henry…. THAT’S WHAT YOU DO!!

Oh no next week on Raw is gonna be MAAAAAAD! Hulk Hogan’s Born Day plus surprise guests???? Ok let’s get to guessing… Rowdy Roddy Piper gotta be there… Sandow will be there probably dressed up as Mr America and sh!t… how about The Rock & Stone Cold Steve Austin??? Nah that’s asking too much! But is $9.99 (£6.71) for the WWE Network asking too much?????

I like the banter and jokes surrounding the WWE Network between JAY-BEE and Lawler… it’s almost classic heel commentary! If those internet muthaf***az complain about this…. it makes me wanna rage like Ken in Fist of the North Star and throw fists at y’all muthaf***az!

 

What sort of move was that by Bertie???? That was like a reverse suplex off the top ropes!!!! And Ambrose survives??? DAYUUUM!!!

Bwoy Bertie was a tough opponent for Ambrose! 15mins42secs is the time to beat for Seth Rollins… Winner of beat the clock chooses the stipulation…. if I was Ambrose, If Seth fails to beat the clock I’d choose an ‘I’ll F**K YOU UP’ match and take the briefcase!

OK LADS HOLD YOUR NUTS AND KEEP YOUR PALMS ON EM! Miss Tight Up Skirt herself – Lana is in the hiz-houuuuussse! And if you want her to grip your nuts all you gotta do is send for the WWE Network for $9.99 (£6.71)!!!!

LAYDEEZ!!! If you’re bi-sexual and want Lana to give you that good scissor lovin, send for the WWE Network for only $9.99 (£6.71)!

Lana has a good singing voice don’t you think??? If you want her to sing happy birthday to you, you know what to do…..

WWE NETWORK, $9.99 (£6.71)!!!

Damnit I was hoping that Rusev would CRUSH that Zeb Colter….maybe I’ll see it at Summerslam…. on the WWE Net…. wait a minute, I won’t have to do that since I will be with the STC LIVE at the Hogshead!!!!

 

Trust DRY ENGLAND to be last with the WWE Network… 170 different countries get it from next week and we have to wait til October 1????? What sort of sh!t is that???? F**k that – I blame Cameron…. I bet he’s trying to add WWE Network tax on that sh!t! If anyone deserves the Fist of the North Star punches… or if there is anyone I hate more than the IWC… it’s that muthaf***a who calls himself the prime minister! Get me in the ring with that bastard – I’LL F**K HIM UP!

Ziggler just beat Cesaro???? The Grant Says – I think it was a mistake that Cesaro broke away from Heyman….ever since then he’s been losing and sh!t… and Anthony Cardenas – it’s not ‘jobbing’ if Cesaro loses once! It’s just a loss! No wonder Ric Flair hates us using wrestling terminology!

Look at the creativity behind Cody Rhodes new Stardust character!!!! It’s amazing!!!! Even his fighting style is different to that of Cody himself! It’s a damn shame that they not at Summerslams… there’s 8 matches signed and not one of em are for the tag team titles! Maybe a tag team turmoil is needed here??? Even if it’s for pre-show?

Oh no My hero Kane has taken back off his mask…. I hope it’s not back to the school trousers he wore….. Undertaker talk to your brother man!!!!

Do you think WWE2K15 will clock on to the crowd holding their phones with The Wyatt entrance?

Damn Jericho just cannot get a break!!!! Every week the lights go out and he gets buss arse by Bray Wyatt! I keep telling that muthaf***a to bring a chair with him every time he fights the Wyatt man dem… he never listens…. and oh yeah, get a stipulation going or something!!!

WTF IS THIS? Fandango’s new partner is MUTHAF***K!N HORNSWOGGLE??? F**KOUTTAHERE… I’m getting my Ice Cream… Incidentally French Vanilla (Summer Rae) and Caramel Sundae (Layla) are at ringside…. and I’d get all up in their guts! They want their pu$$y sucked… ICE CREAM!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Oh no! Bo Dallas lost again on Smackdown by DQ??? Dayuuum! R-Truth is on a role!!! Maybe R-Truth should face the Underta…… oh wait…..

Look at JAY-BEE with the piece of paper saying $9.99!!!! If I see fans in the crowd with $9.99 as signs I am gonna crack up!!!

Ok people, 15 minutes. 42 seconds or less for Seth Rollins to defeat Rob Van Dam…. something tells me Seth will fail to this…

OH SNAP!!!! Heath Slater replaces RVD in this beat the clock challenge??? The Authority is being TEEF here…. F**k that – it’s all about Stephanie Vs Brie now!

Wait a minute – Dean Ambrose at ringside…. uh-oh!!! What if Ambrose f**ks it up and Heath Slater wins?????!!! Now it’s got interesting!

Hold up – how did Ambrose manage to open the briefcase and rip up the contract???? He can’t do that!!!! He just poured popcorn and soda all over that muthaf***a! How is Rollins gonna cash in his cheque??? He CAN’T!!!! Well there goes my guess of the ladder match with the briefcase up for grabs down the sewer…. shout out to Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles & Das Efx!

OH SNAP!!!!!!! Heath Slater win!!!!! BLODCLART!!!!!! Ambrose you gonna pay for that I will assure you!!

Oh hell naw!!! I have to wait til Smackdowns until Dean Ambrose names the stipulation??? Ok I’ll make an effort to watch that sh!t!!!GRANT BODY THRONE - P

Once again – Stephanie & Brie get the main event segment….. twice in a row??? THIS IS WHAT I CAME TO SEE!!! THE CONTRACT SIGNING! WWE Fans stand up! Wrestling nerds sit the f**k down!

Usually I hate the crowd for this but this time I respect them for this! Brie is gonna f**k up Stephanie for herself, Danny, Nikki, Big Show, The Rhodes Family, and CM PUNK!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! YES!

What I saw next could be the funniest thing since GET IN THE CHAIR!

Stephanie signs the contract, slaps Nikki down! Before Brie could retaliate, Triple Teef pushes the table into the corner trapping Brie! LOOK AT THE SMILE ON HIS FACE!!! Stephanie with a Pedigree to Nikki – BLAOW!!!! OH SNAP!!!! Brie BEX!!! She slaps Triple!!!! But Stephanie grabs Brie, sets her up too! Pedigree into the canvas – BLAOW!!!!!

To those of you dyam arses who say Stephanie can’t wrestle, that she can’t fight, have you conveniently forgotten that Stephanie has been taking boxing lessons? That her husband is a 13 time Wrestling Champion who uses the hammer? So him teach her wrestling move???? Yeah you dumb wrestling internet keyboard warriors know it all don’t you? I actually remember Stephanie using the pedigree in the attitude era days… HA! I hope Danny has taught Brie how to use those pretty legs of hers to kick down Stephanie!

I AM KAZUYA GRANTSHIMA, THE MAN IN THE PURPLE SUIT, AND I GUT PUNCH INTERNET WRESTLING FANS LYRICALLY!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

#VOCAREADREGNUM!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#GWARNYUHBED

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

FOLLOW SMACK TALK CENTRE ON TWITTER

DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.

BDSIR Networkwww.cageamateursuk.com

Monday Night Raw #1103: July 14, 2014!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw

Smack Talk Centre Raw Logo

The Infamous Informer

Ok so Germany won the muthaf***!n World Cup…. THAT AIN’T SH!T compared to my triumph!!!! I met the Supreme Clientele Champion himself – Ghostface Killah! My idol of 20 years!!!

GRANTFACE KILLAHNow that I’ve been in the presence of greatness, YOU are reading greatness. I appreciate that. I got my ginger nuts, my dairy milk bubbly mint chocolate, my Sprite, I’ve had a nap after the epic London trip… LET’S DO THIS!!! RAW #1103, HOLD’DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZWord on the street is that the icon himself Sting will appear on Raw to promote his addition on WWE2K15!!!! I have warned a certain STC member in the name of Stephen Cooper: If Sting DOES NOT APPEAR IN THE RAW ARENA…. the dreaded chair awaits!!!! Believe me – he don’t wanna go there!!!

So w’happen, they got Cena to advertise the WWE Network now? I think I’m used to Michael Cole advertising that sh!t!!! F**k that – The Infamous Informer and Shadfather advertise that sh!t better – It’s $9.99 a month which is £6.71 – which is around the national minimum wage so THE GRANT SAYS – if you working and you’re a wrestling fan… you better cop that sh!t before I clap you in your head!

You mean to tell me that while Dean Ambrose was getting buss arse by My hero Kane, Seth Rollins and Randall, John Cena and Roman Reigns were in the ring just watching that sh!t? I thought Ambrose was your ‘brother’ Roman??? Oh I get it… one of them was Kane…. but you’re both big strapping guys huh???? You both claim to be ‘Superman’ in your own right??? As Vincent Kennedy would say, ‘John Cena & Roman Reigns are nothing more than two, putrid… p-(censored)!!!!!’

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Oh HELL 2 DA NAW!!! It’s that how it goes down? Everytime Miz fights his grill is gonna be on the titantron??? While I remind myself it’s not the attitude era no more, now would be a good time to ask Austin & Big Show to destroy the titantron!!!

I’d rather see Vladimir Putin’s dry @$$ grill up on that muthaf***a!

Word is that Wade Barrett will be at Battleground to present the Intercontinental Championship to the winner…. while Shadfather backs the Great Khali, I back The Miz!!! I hope Wade Barrett says “Congratulations you won the Intercontinental Championship, but I’m afraid I got some BAD NEWS!” And clap down the winner with the belt! It would be great!!!!

Damn the way Stephanie is all over Triple… I’m not interested in this next Dolph Ziggler contest…. Triple just GET IN THAT PU$$Y! Or do I have to go GRANTINGTON STEELE on your wife while you watch and you jerk your hammer?

GRANT BODY – P!!!

HA! HA! Fandango as a solo dancer…. that’s right – because he’s a B!TCH!!!!! Since I hate both Ziggler and Fandango, lets watch this right here, when Summer Rae and my Baby Moda Layla saw sense and beat down the pansy!

YES! YES! YES! Now on Raw, Summer Rae & Layla just dissed Fandango! Now they dancing around Ziggler! THIS IS IT! They could cure Ziggler of his homosexual tendencies!!!!! I’m sorry, if I was Ziggler, I don’t care if it’s in front of 15,000 fans, I would be protruding in those wrestling trunks!!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

NO! Sandow dressed as some idiot in a McDonald’s???? EPIC FAIL! WWE YOU DROPPED THE BALL HERE! He could have dressed up as Sting to annoy the fans on some bullsh!t!

DAMIEN STINGDOW

There could still be hope for STC’s Stephen Cooper yet!!!!

OH SNAP – 2 out of 3 falls tag team contest between The Wyatt man dem and the Uso Brudda at Battleground? Did you see the Wyatt tag team super move? I don’t know what to call it – f**k it – I call it the Buzzard Death Drop – BLAOW!!!! I’m sorry Usos – you cannot compete with that move!

Lana what you doing hiding behind that podium thing? Let me see your sexy @$$ legs in that tight up skirt!!! Anyway I’m backing your argument girl in this American/Russian détente thing going on here!Official_WWE_Battleground_poster_featuring_Bray_Wyatt

GOD DAMN – Lana makes that Russian accent sound sexy – imagine f**k!n her and she has to scream and holla in that language???!!! GOOD GAWD ALMIGHTY!

See that’s why Rusev gonna beat Swagger at Battleground – even the crowd boo their own president…. RACIAL MAN RACIAL!!!!!

But I gotta say – I can’t wait for this match!!!! Backing Rusev all the way! RUSEV! CRUSH! USE THE ACCOLADE AND KILL!!!!

OH MY GOD! WWE NETWORK DOING A PHILIP BROOKS SPECIAL! All the Philip Brooks fans are gonna rush to the chemists and get that essential cream to put on their genitalia!!! Chemists across the world are gonna make a huge turnover!!! Socks will be hard to find in Primark! Normal folk (that’s me and you) invest in an umbrella! There’s gonna be CM Spunk everywhere!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

…and the suffering of Nikki Bella continues! Listen to Stephanie wuk brain on Nikki, saying that Brie was selfish for leaving her hanging like that! Well Steph has a point, I mean, The Bella Twins are a package after all, fans like to see the twins… but let’s be real, ever since they got involved with Danny Bryan & John Cena the appeal has gone… I don’t know about you… I don’t fancy the twins anymore… like Beyoncé and Kim Kardashian, when they got involved with Jay-Z and Kanye, the sex appeal was lost. Don’t get mad, I’m only being real!

You know – the team of Cameron and Alicia Fox could work here… do you think Naomi will come out to help out??? You never know!

Say what? Cameron Vs Naomi at Battleground???? WHOA! This PPV is gonna be great!!!

Even though I knew about this…. I JUST MARKED THE F**K OUT WATCHING THE TRAILER!!! TWO GENERATIONS OF STING ON WWE2K15!!! THE GRANT SAYS – I’m pre-ordering that sh!t!!!!! If WWE do the entrance like what they just did there…. HOLY F**K!!!!

Hmmm interesting…What’s wrong Randall? Afraid that my hero Kane won’t stick to the plan and make you the champion??? If that’s the plan we don’t need a plan B???? Triple looked at Randall as if to say – there is ALWAYS A PLAN B…

Talking of Plan B…. what’s this I hear? Paul Heyman quit? Or he was fired? All apart of the plan people! I was looking forward to him telling me that his client – Plan B himself – conquered the Undertaker’s Streak at WrestleMania!

YES!!! With the combined force of Big E & Kofi, Big E defeated Cesaro! Suddenly Heyman disappears and Cesaro loses????!!!!! Ok now guys, call up Mark Henry and Titus…..

Are people chanting ‘BORING’ to Bray Wyatt’s promo? do me a favour wrestling fools – purchase the muthaf***!n network for $9.99 a month – you have to purchase the cream separately – watch your f**k!n Philip Brooks documentary and F**K OFF!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

LAWD HAVE MERCY – EVA MARIE DEP PON DE TELLY! Let’s see what she has learned….

Whoa Eva has improved a little bit! She has learned a few holds and submissions! And a back-breaker too! WOW! Only that her moves don’t look like they hurt…

I’d still f**k the sh!t out of her though! Grantington Steele that pu$$y – BANG BANG BANG!!!

Big ups to WWE – they got the Sting merchandise up for sale and everything! Come on guys! Get to contributing towards Sting’s retirement fund!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

All I have to do is BO-LIEVE!!! Bo-Lieve that while he’s fighting The Great Khali, I’m getting some ice cream!!!

Hey I just had a thought…. Do you think Bo Dallas could win the Battle Royal?????

He just defeated The Great Khali via count-out! Maybe he may lose the Streak to don of dons himself???? Just a thought…

Oh no! Paul Heyman is here!!!! Here we go! He’s talking about Plan C! And he didn’t mention the Undertaker’s streak!!! Uh Oh guys and gals! stay close to your loved ones!!! Tell them that you love them!

Why does this muthaf***a Flo-rida keep passing through Raw? He must be broke because nobody buying his wack records or downloading his sh!t from iTunes! And RePPiN4U sure as hell doesn’t endorse his sh!t!

ENOUGH OF THAT SH!T – RIC FLAIR IS HERE!!!! RIC FLAIR N!**@!

Wow Ric Flair looks good! Look at him looking at Renée like he wants to go buckwild and profile up in her @$$!

Oh no!! Ric Flair predicts John Cena gonna hold down the title at Battleground! Roman Reigns don’t like that sh!t! I tell you this: If Renée asked me that same question – who I think gonna win… I would say…. ME!!! Let’s me and you go in the back, play some Ghostface Killah, and make the Wizard of Poetry do the talking!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Uh-oh!!! at time of writing this, there is about 20 minutes left until I begin construction of the chair custom-built for Stephen Cooper!

It could be excellent strategy here, that Kane, Randall and Seth Rollins took out Ambrose earlier… let’s do the knowledge here, Ambrose says that anytime Seth tries to cash the cheque, he would come and f**k it up. So by doing that, they take on Roman and Cena, they brukk them up enough and then Seth can cash his cheque right there without worrying about Ambrose!

Nice to see Seth Rollins using the three amigo suplex right there! Ok who’s gonna use the triple German suplex?!!! Yes wrestling fools, WWE may erase Chris Benoit out of their history minus the network but his moves live on live long through various superstars!

Well Well Well! All guys in that match minus Seth Rollins be dropping their super moves on each other setting up the Fatal 4 Way jump off…. AND THE SHOW HAS ENDED!!!! You know what that means! Out comes the tool box! all the nails, all the wood, all the sharp edges… Let’s begin CONSTRUCTION!!! OHHHH STEPHEN???!!!!!!

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

(back story – he was on STC FB page today ranting and raving about Sting’s appearance on WWE Raw this week, he knew it was to promote the game, but he really thought he was gonna appear, and tried to convince us… I warned him only ONCE, that if Sting DOES NOT APPEAR… he would be given the GET IN THE CHAIR!!! AWARD…. his brother Ian Cooper is gonna love this, especially when WWE Network are doing a special on his idol???!!!!)

GRANT BODY – P!!!

#VOCAREADREGNUM!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#GWARNYUHBED

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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Monday Night Raw #1094: May 12, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer

Since WWE likes to sign up new divas for a development deal, they might be interested in this one! Name: Solange Knowles… she put her boots to Jay-Z’s Candy @$$! Blows up Facebook, everybody put it pon dem wall like they found the breaking news… but what I wanna know is: WHY? Why did Solange spazz out on Jay and Beyoncé just stood there… what did Jay do??? People quick to post it because they jumped on the bandwagon of hating Jay-Z. You sheeple are foolish! (Oh you’re defending Illum-) STOP YOUR NOISE! You’re the ones with your sheep masks following the buzzards!

And that story overshadowed the fact that Chef Raekwon is heading to the studio to lace some verses for Wu-Tang’s A Better Tomorrow album….

ENOUGH OF THIS SH!T – Isn’t Raw in the UK this week? I dare you Zeb – come to our shores… I’M BEGGIN YA!!!

RAW #1094, HOLD DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZI guess we’re not in the UK… F**K the long talk! The Shield are like – Is that all you got Evolution? We are gonna straight – F**K YOU UP!!!

And that’s what they set out to do! As soon as Triple come out his limo, The Shield rushed him and his crew!!! LAWD HAVE MERCY!!!

Oh no that muthaf***a has got that muthaf***!n deportation list again, now he’s added Adam Rose on that list and look what happen… here he comes with his party crew, and f**ked it up for Wack Swagger! I’ve just learned that this Adam Rose dude is British as well… the STC are on split feelings on this one! I notice no one is on that We The People sh!t…. if only they listened to me, but NOOOOOOOO!!! I’m just a black man who doesn’t care about the Chris B£^@!+ sh!t…

Here comes Paige… one of the people Zeb Colter doesn’t like…. I look at you all in disgust!

GRANT - BODY - P

Alicia Fox is out to f**k up Paige isn’t she??? Claims she doesn’t fit in… well durrrr!!! Paige will tell you she doesn’t fit in, because she’s the Anti Diva! She ain’t gonna look pretty like say Eva Marie and have no skills… Because she HAS skills brings sexual appeal to a lot of the STC guys! She still doesn’t stimulate me… I’m sorry!

All those power moves Alicia, and Paige out wrestles your @$$??? Damn girl! Kicking up a fuss ain’t gotta do sh!t, go back and fix up! And I don’t mean taking off with JAY-BEE’s cowboy hat and gone with it!

Tell me it’s not so…. did the Authority win the war after all that? Danny Bryan has to go away for neck surgery…ain’t that a b!tch… what does this mean? Has he gotta give up his titles???? This is f**ked up word up! I guess that means Cena can reclaim his throne…. I was hoping for that alleged Buried Alive match at Payback…. let’s see how long Danny is out the game for… Kurt Angle Danny Bryan

RECORD SKIP – there’s now talk of Luke Harper and Erick Rowan possibly fighting the Usos for the tag team titles???? UH-OH!!! I sense the end of the Usos reign… let’s hope it’s not the case but either way it makes for good storyline!

You mean to tell me that after that victory by Cena & The Usos, Bray Wyatt is laughing about it and says ‘he realises what he must do’???? This is what I mean with Bray! You can’t just defeat him in a wrestling competition, you must DESTROY HIM COMPLETELY!!!!

Oh dear Evolution – dem mans are BEX!!! Triple TEEF with the long talk – ‘We gonna pick apart Dean Ambrose-uuuuuuuuh, then we gonna tear the wings from Seth Rollins-uuuuuuuh, then Roman Reigns is gonna get the slow beating-uuuuuuh! Because at Payback-uuuuuuuuh, it’s gonna be’ – SHUDDUP!!! The Shield rushed them again!!!! Batista is fuming! He wants to test Roman Reigns later!!! And he will probably get brukk up too! Why you bex for Batista? RZA & Raekwon have reached their agreements! The album will be completed!

Back to our Total Laydeez, now Natalya and Nikki are competing in a match because Natalya made a god-awful painting of Nikki and John, I thought it was a sweet gift but it’s led to a wrestling contest so here we go, the other ladies are rating the wrestling moves… cameramen what are you doing??? Get the cameras on Cameron! She got the new single out! What – Ray J is not there??? Shut up and tek de picture!

Nikki won the match… I suppose there is a penalty for giving a nice gift from the goodness of your heart…

 

When the rain comes down,

I know it’s falling for me, and only for me…

And the pain comes around, somewhere else I’d rather be,

I know what I’ve done, Please forgive me…

I bet that’s what’s going through Natalya’s head right now…

Damn son I’m trying to get into this Sheamus Vs Ryback match but I’m tired yo… where’s Paul Heyman to give me joke???

Ok I don’t get Heyman but I get Stephanie McMahon….. OH YEAH!!!!

Hang on, I think I get the picture…. she’s gonna take the titles from Danny… or maybe not…. oh sh!t!!! IT’S KAAAAAANE!!! He just drew Danny’s carcass out to the stage!! Oh lawwwd this means Brie is vulnerable!!!! She still has to come to work!!!!

Danny taken away in an ambulance, Stephanie going on like she’s sincere… Brie pushes her one side and did you see the look on Stephanie’s face???? I saw Vincent Kennedy…. Oh dear Brie I wouldn’t want to be you!!!!

Now this is the point where I cuss down Fandango to the ground because he stole my beautiful Layla… but if he’s fighting Dolph Ziggler then we have a common enemy… COME ON FANDANGO!!! DESTROY HIM!!!

OH F**K!!!! Layla might have cost Fandango the match here… well Layla, that’s what you get for dissin me…wait – Fandango LOVES YOU??? WHOA!!! He don’t love you like I do Layla…

Aiyo, he don’t really love you like I do
Kiss your feet, make love to you, like I do
Wake you up, in the night tank and surprise you
Cross my heart, swear, put my hand on the bible
I’m not a cold-blooded killa, baby, I cry too
The best thing for me is when I’m laying beside you
Turn you over, open up, get up inside you
He a woman beater, no doubt, and he lies too…

Yo what up Hacksaw Jim Duggan!!!! HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

F**K ME that Lana…she that chick that you f**k her with her clothes on…. if she doesn’t have a man, something seriously wrong with the world! Why hasn’t WWE got her on book signings in the UK damnit??!!!

So Lana sets Yusef on Hacksaw… he was ready to take him but Big E Langston thought – that ain’t happening… only to get brukk up…. damn, how many more black wrestlers gotta die??? First R-Truth, Xavier Woods, then Kofi, now Big E???? WTF???Racial man Racial!!!!

I’m glad that Sandow got rid of that Magneto sh!t…. they gave him back the mic to chat… Oh Cody Rhodes why did you interrupt him for? I was looking forward to Sandow to SILENCE!! the crowd!

Now we realise what Bray Wyatt is gonna do! Beat down Cena until he can no longer stand??? Last Man Standing…. Payback… OH MAN!!!!

Enough of that sh!t – Batista! Roman Reigns! HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

Evolution and The Shield already at ringside – you already know this ain’t ending well…

…for Evolution!!! They tried to be teef and got half the locker room to rush the ring to beat down the Shield! But the Hounds of Justice sent for reinforcements of their own in the form of a steel chair each and beat down the jabronies! It was like power rangers beating down the puttys but militant style! Has Ryback got the record for most Shield powerbombs into the canvas??? He has to surely!!!

Well evolution hinted at a stipulation, I long to see what that could be and by the looks of those chairs how they were swung it could be a further hint… but damn, Danny Bryan out the game???? F***************K!!!!

#VOCAREADREGNUM!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#GWARNYUHBED

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

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DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.

Smack Talk Centre Ray Logo

The Infamous Informer

BDSIR Network

http://www.cageamateursuk.com/News.php