Tag Archives: Stephanie

Monday Night Raw #1298, April 9, 2018!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

SHAME. SHAME. SHAME! RING THE BELL!

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Imagine! I’m supposed to talk about how Ronda Rousey looked sexy in that little kilt she had on, I should talk about when a little kid named Nicholas is a tag team champion and could get the next Warrior award next year, I should talk about how NO ONE apart from Mike Knoxxx knew that Brock Lesnar was gonna hold down the title and could be going for the 434 days…which I support I might add! I should even talk about the Undertaker! Looking like a million bucks and f**ked up John Cena… but when you talk WrestleMania moments… it doesn’t get better than this! Natalya exposing her shaven pu$$y in front of 78,811 fans… GOD DAYUUUUUUM!

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1298! RAW AFTER MANIA! Who’s coming from NXT? Who is gonna surprise our @$$£$?

Look at Stephanie’s arm!! AWWWWWWW!!! Now SHUDDUP and sign those cheques!

Hey Ronda girl don’t trust that Stephanie!!! What is she up to?

It’s very similar to when Vincent Kennedy was trying to tell Austin that he needs to adapt and be flexible, and adaptation is a key of life as well as in business! Now fans! Telling Steph to shut the f**k up is advice YOU GUYS should be practicing!

Rousey as Austin: “Can I get 10 seconds to think about it?”

Stephanie as Vince: “By all means!”

Rousey as Austin: ARM BAR AS THE STUNNER!

NIA JAX: NEW WORLD WRESTLING FEDERATION RAW WOMEN’S CHAMPION!

nia jax oh my dayz

Wait a second – it’s a handicap match? Mickie James & Alexa must combine their force? Why don’t the fans chant…. OH SNAP THEY CALLED ALEXA AN @$$HOLE! WHOA!

IT’S NO HANDICAP! EMBER MOON IS IN THE BUILDING!!!! YES!!!

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SEXY B!TCH! LOOK AT HER! OWWWWWWWWW!

Even better – she hit Alexa Bliss with the Eclipse super move! BEAUTIFUL! LIFE IS GOOD!

Well what do you know?! Nicholas is over with the crowd! BUT Nicholas has school! So They have given up the titles! I was hoping Nicholas was gonna get some pu$$y with those tag titles!

GRANT BODY-P!

NO WAY JOSE is on the house! Yes its that Adam Rose sh!t all over again… I see people complaining on the internet already… come on man it’s party time!

SETH ROLLINS! NEW WORLD WRESTLING FEDERATION INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION!!!

I don’t know what all that was about thanks to the stream, but it looks like as the Miztourage was gonna take on Finn Balor & Seth Rollins, JEFF HARDY comes out!!! So hmmmm! They not gonna run with that Brother Nero sh!t????

The fans are still singing that stupid song to Bayley? NOT Mandy Rose??? AH CHUPID SONG!!! Mind you I wouldn’t be too happy if the crowd sand ‘Guess Who Loves You More’ to Naomi… even though I would understand!

Holy smokes Paige has finally dropped the R – Bomb… like Undertaker put back on his gloves and his coat and his hat, but Paige is the one who is forced to put down her pale make up in the middle of the canvas… this is the part where I should say ‘Thank You Paige’… but since I was never a fan… I’ll leave that to you guys.

Now if I was Elias I would be careful what I say on that guitar! One false mention of the don of dons and he’s going to be in a box!!!!

The WWE Universe is down with Walking With Elias though!!! Not me though – I’m hip hop to the core!

You know what Elias – dissing the crowd might not help you!

BUMBACLAAAAAAAAAT! BOBBY LASHLEY!!!! HOLY SMOKES!!! HE’S NOT SHUCKING AND JIVIN’! 

You know what Apollo? retreat to Smackdown! It’s not a good look for you kid!

GUNSHOT! “Our tag team division is full, but I heard TNA is hiring…” I can’t believe Kurt said that!!!! THE FIFTH WALL IS BROKEN!

You don’t suppose Vincent Kennedy has brought…. nah it cannot be possible surely?!!!

Heath Slater & Rhyno – you guys are going in a box – THE AUTHORS OF PAIN ARE HERE! Thanks for being WWE superstars… you will be missed…

Here he is! Mr Marmite! The Big Dog! Come on fans! He didn’t retire The Undertaker! Cut him some slack!

Brock Lesnar has re-signed with the World Wrestling Federation! Oh man! And he’s fighting Double R at the Greatest Royal Rumbles! Come on BROCK! I’m only supporting you because I want you to break the 434!

Oh man! Double R has still gotta deal with this dude! Samoa Joe – who has missed TWO WrestleManias on the trot… that’s f**ked up!

See Samoa Joe is running down Reigns calling him a failure… but Reigns could have countered like – yeah it took 6 F5s to put me down! It only took ONE to put you down! Sorry Double R, you made yourself look like a beeeeeattchhh!

GRANT BODY-P!

Bray Wyatt ‘reincarnated’… now he plays second fiddle to Matt Hardy! WOW! What a b!tch!

So, Kurt says if Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn want a job… they gotta fight for it… such is life!

Er… oh no! Neither individual answered the 10 count! Now both are not on RAW either! Maybe ROH are hiring… or New Japan even… that’s not a bad thing? We love the New Japan!

Kami TNA

Commentators acknowledging the possibility that The Miz could go to Smackdown in the shake up (which happens next week) and restarting the beef with Danny Bryan!

Wasn’t it glorious when Jeff Hardy, Seth Rollins and Finn Balor f**ked up the Miztourage! OHHHH WHAT A FEELING!

 

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Monday Night Raw #1293, March 5, 2018!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

I hope you die-hard wrestling fans hate me, that’s ok, because I hate you right back!

This is what I don’t understand, you see 30 second squash matches on RAW every other week, hell – Sheamus defeated Danny Bryan in 18 seconds at WrestleMania 28 for crying out loud. And yet, you muthaf***az are complaining on the internet over something that happened at a HOUSE SHOW, which you never witnessed live (unless you were in the building of course) you never PAID FOR IT, and above all else, you UK FANS were SNOWED IN! You weren’t moving anywhere! With that said…

SEAN PRICE - STFU

Oh wait, I do understand… it was in Chicago, the place where they worship some guy who doesn’t give a f**k about them…

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1293! What’s this I hear about a 50-man Royal Rumble????? Saudi Arabia be making major moves star!

Greatest Royal Rumble

I got cookies, a cup of soup, and a Jamaica Ginger Cake with custard for later! LET’S DO THIS SH!T KURK!

KURT IS CALLING TRIPLE TEEF OUT! HE’S BACKED OFF HIS JACKET TOO!

Wait a minute – Kurt stripping off clothes and Stephanie comes out here? We know you want Kurt to f**k you one more time!

GRANT BODY-P!

Listen to Stephanie wukkin brain! Know Your Role Kurt! Make matches Kurt! Use your head Kurt!

Ronda Rousey is all smiles! She must have had sex earlier!

GRANT THAT IS ENOUGH!

Hold on – Ronda said her debut match at WrestleMania -she can choose anyone she wanted! Er… Stephanie??

Wait a minute – I thought Triple wasn’t here yet!

Oh no! Turns out Stephanie has a second contract as a WWE Superstar! Same with Triple H! Kurt is doing his job – he’s making the matches!!!

There it is! Triple & Stephanie Vs Kurt & Ronda Rousey at the big BIG WrestleMania! (yes we already knew that because we read the dirt sheets) But the way they dropped it – I was marking the f**k out! Kurt got Triple in the ankle lock, Stephanie tried to teef but Rousey caught her with the Samoan Drop! HOLY SMOKES!

F**k that – I’m ready for the Big BIG WrestleMania! JUST LIKE THAT!

Now Asuka is here! GOD DAYUUUUUM SHE FINE!

Mike Cole promoting Ninja Warrior? PAY MAKOTO NAGANO HIS MONEY!

Makoo Nagano

Oh lawd Nia Jax is killing Asuka! SHE WANTS TO KILL!!!! But Asuka got the Triangle chokehold! She won’t let go! It’s locked in for the longest! Nia tried to fight out but Asuka transitioned into an arm bar!!!! SHE’S GONNA BREAK THE ARM! Nia had to tap out! If I was Asuka – I would run for the hills! Alexa Bliss looks like urine gonna leave her vagina and go down her leg!

GRANT BODY-P!

You gotta be kidding me! The almighty Nia Jax CRYING? What is this?!!!! Where are you Shadfather – console this woman!

Shout out to the cute girl who works at Iceland ‘Natalie’ I think her name is – can’t remember – I did my shopping today, I saw the 3 for £2 offer on the cookies, now normally the cashier is like ‘Do you have an Iceland Card?’ Or ‘would you like a bag?’ Not this chick… I know it’s all about service with a smile but she’s like ‘enjoy your cookies!’ Aaah bless her… if I was single…

GRANT BODY-P!

I honestly thought The Revival would be next in line for the titles and go to big BIG WrestleMania… wow.. you NXT guys are allowed to complain on the internet…

I know John Cena is a free agent… but I think he’s taking the p!$$ coming on RAW to explain his WrestleMania plans… you’re fighting on Smackdown homie!

Yes crowd – boo this man! He doesn’t need to be on RAW!!!!

Ok he suggests I listen…

Uh-oh – he’s out to break Ric Flair’s title reigns… I don’t think Ric Flair cares… you saw him in that 21 Savage video!

John Cena wants that Triple Threat match! He wants to Shatter the dreams of die-hard wrestling fans who want AJ Styles Vs Strong Style!

Talking of Shattered Dreams… I don’t understand why Goldust  is out here! Very random…

John Cena looks as confused as us! So confused that he went down after Goldust boxed him!

Careful John – Goldust might have Victoria Secret underneath that outfit!

GRANT BODY-P!

Why did Goldust even bother… he was so much more entertaining when he had the hots for Rowdy Roddy Piper…

Elias speaks the truth! Music brings us together, not tear us apart!

Elias vs Braun in a Symphony of Destruction match! Well as long as RZA’s 36 Chambers studios are not involved… that goes for 9th Wonder’s Jamla studios…

Congratulations to Hillbilly Jim hitting the Hall of fame… he doesn’t mean a damn thing to me but there you go…

Corey Graves just called Mandy Rose – God’s Greatest Creation… There is no doubt – Mandy Rose is hot…but I believe God created something even greater…

tiffany haddish

Meet Tiffany Haddish guys… star of the film ‘Girl Trip’ – she is sexy as f**k and she is funny as hell. LOOK AT THAT… OWWWWWWWWWWW!!!

What’s wrong with you Bayley? Sasha saved your clart! You refuse her hug? Oh well come hug me Sasha god dayuuuuum!!!

Big BIG WrestleMania 34

Elias can play every instrument! If hat is so, why hasn’t Ghostface Killah approached Elias for beats?!!!

Elias tried to get away in the car! But the car wouldn’t move!!!

I’M NOT FINISHED WITH YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Guys I just got an important message on Facebook… it’s the President of The Wu Worldwide DJ Coalition. I gotta take this call…

Holy smokes! Elias is probably DEAD BY NOW! Braun lick him down with the cello, then he dropped the piano on him! OH SHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

BRAUN CHISELED YOUR TOMBSTONE! SLEEP WELL!!!!

If you are a gamer, you haven’t lived until you have played Fatal Fury 2… I mean, the last boss fights you in front of a live orchestra… that’s f**ked up!

Now Bray Wyatt just beat Rhyno in roughly 30 seconds… go on – COMPLAIN ON THE INTERNET NOW!!!!

Bray Wyatt just mentioned ‘Final Deletion’!

The Hardy Compound??? WHOA! ULTIMATE DELETION!!! I knew it had to go that route! YES!!!

“GET OUT? Get Out is what Kurt Angle should do with Monday Night Raw…” Miz is outta order for that!

He says Kurt is sucking up to Ronda Rousey… I don’t know about you but I would ‘suck’ up to Ronda Rousey…

GRANT BODY-P!

I like that idea! The Miztourage Vs Seth Rollins & Finn Balor? LET’S GO! I wanna see the Miz get BUSS ARSE AGAIN after talking sh!t!

THERE IT IS! TRIPLE THREAT MATCH! Miz Vs Seth Rollins Vs Finn Balor at the big BIG WrestleMania… see I’m supposed to get excited but again – you guys read the dirt sheets and spoiled everything!

Paul Heyman is here with the WWE Universal Championship in his hands!

Wait a minute – he says Brock Lesnar will soon hold BOTH the Universal Title AND the UFC Heavyweight Title? He can’t do that surely?!

Paul Heyman just called the Universal Title ‘Brock’s B!tch?’ Does that mean Brock is cheating on Sable???

Heyman says Double R cannot shoot from the hip against him or Brock! He’s likely to be right!! But Double R is here anyway!

Told Heyman straight – that next week in Detroit, just like D12… it’s FIGHT MUSIC!!!

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Monday Night Raw #1276, November 13, 2017!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

 

OL DIRTY BASTARD KING

Today marks the 13th Anniversary of the passing of ODB… the ONLY ODB I will acknowledge, the Ol’ Dirty Bastard of The Wu-Tang Clan. Let me tell you wrestling fans something. If you speak of another ‘ODB’, DO NOT INSULT ME, DO NOT INSULT HIP HOP, and DO NOT READ MY BLOGS.

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1276! It gaah pop off tonight! BUMBACLART!!!

Steph Raw

Double chocolate digestive and a chicken & leek cup of soup. I expect RUCKUS!!!!

Ahhhhhhhhh sheeeeeeeeet! Stephanie is here! Why she got on some dress that looks like a 60-year-old would wear?! She needs to take it off…
Shout out to Shabba Ranks and Johnny Gill… Slow and Sexy… GRANT BODY-P!
Come on Kurt – sweet talk Steph! What happened to your charm? Show her your gold medals do something!
The crowd doesn’t seem to like Jason Jordan very much! They don’t like John Cena either!
Oh no! Steph thinks Kurt has gone soft! I could never be ‘soft’ around Steph… I’m just saying…
GRANT BODY-P!
The Shield are here! You don’t think they are gonna powerbomb Stephanie through the ring are they???
Wait – I take that back what I said about Steph – she got some stockings on or something – GOD DAYUUUUUUM!
How is Steph gonna ask

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

where has he been? Like we don’t know!

I thought Double R was gonna say what he and the Shield was gonna do to Steph! As in sexually!
THE BLACK SHIELD
Stephanie… we know you’re a freak… can you take us three????
OH MY GOD THAT IS ENOUGH!!!
Triple threat match to find out who joins the Raw women’s team! Mickie James all the way! I’m surprised Dana Brooke still has a contract! I hope she doesn’t miss her friend too much!
And of course you got Bayley… surely the favourite right?
Side note – Nia Jax looks hot with those braids she got going on! Actually lets throw a pic of her… for no reason!
Nia Jax lawd2
…and the bell has sounded! So much for your dirt sheets! Where’s Paige at then wrestling experts???? YOU IMBECILES!
Er… how the rarse is Dana Brooke gonna slap Asuka? That’s career suicide right there! Asuka with a roundhouse kick to Dana’s cheekbone – BLAOW!
Bayley is the 5th member! Fantastic! #DirtSheetsAreTheDevil – you are damned fools for reading those sh!ts!
Enzo calls his Championship his ‘boo’… that’s the closest he’s gonna get to pu$$y!
Time for the Shield to buss The Miz arse again! Oh it’s Miz TV? Where’s the remote – change the channel! But change it back if The Miz gets buss arse!
What’s wrong with Cesaro’s mouth? He’s talking like he got a gun in his mouth!
I could have been more profane, but I like Cesaro… who doesn’t? GRANT BODY-P!
Oh I forgot… when he had his teeth kicked into his gums didn’t he? Sorry my bad!
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Monday Night Raw #1203, June 12, 2016!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

It’s showtime!

She ain’t got no Money In The Bank
She be walkin round actin all stank
Now she at the party lookin at me
Hopin she could get saved by me
I’m lookin at her like I ain’t tryin to save that girl (NO SIR!!!!)
I ain’t tryin to save that girl (NO SIR!!!)
I ain’t tryin to save that girl
She got her hand open like I’m finna pay that girl!

In other news, Insane Championship Wrestling is coming to Smack Talk Centre’s home town of Wolverhampton Nov 4… well THE GRANT SAYS HE’S NEVER GOING! Y’all can enjoy yourselves…I don’t support that narstyness, one man take out his tings and put it in next man face and jerk it at the crowd, me nah pay mi munny to see a man privates! NO SAH!

GRANT BODY-P!!!!!

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RAW #1203! It’s about that time again people! THE RAW BEFORE MUNNY INNAH BANK! I GOT MY PEANUTS AND ICE CREAM… LET’S DO THIS SH!T!!!

It’s been called the biggest Money In The Bank this year???? I know they have to hype it up but that’s huge! Considering how the 2011 one was built up! It was like WWE was facing an apocalypse!

WWF PROPA TINGZThe New Day might be an addict for sneakers but I’m not so sure they can run through Enzo & Cass, the Vaudevillians and the Bullet Club so easy!

This is what we came to see! The New Day in a verbal sword skills contest against Enzo & Cass!

Enzo can’t talk about ‘Francesca’ like that???? She ain’t a slut like Stephanie????? Did someone throw the PG rating out the window?

I find it amusing how the Vaudevillians claim they are ‘quite manly’ when their wrestling attire looks too tight….!!

Did I just hear the bullet club be branded ‘SAWFT’???? I think I did! Do these guys know who they are talking to? They put the Japanese wrestlers on notice!

The New Day… 295 days as World Wrestling Federation tag team champions! They hang on another month, and they beat the record of Brian Kendrick & Paul London! With that said, I’m backing New Day ALL THE WAY  at the Munny Innah Bank!

Sometimes it shows that too much clowning doesn’t win you matches… Bullet Club – the only serious tag team, hit Kingston with the Magic Killer – BLAOW! BALL GAME!

This week! In the Ambrose Asylum – Seth Rollins and Roman Reigns! The Shield reunited! Well sort of… this segment right here could tell the story!

Now some of you wrestling fools actually made a meme and it looked like this:

foolish meme

See this is why you fans are NOT GOOD BOOKERS. You are NOT GOOD BUSINESS PEOPLE. Seth & Roman are in a feud currently for the World Wrestling Federation Championship this Sunday with Deano possibly in the middle. So how the f**k are the Shield on the same page? A match of this magnitude should be saved for a Summerslam or more likely Survivor Series…USE YOUR BRAAAAAAAAINNN!!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

Oh HELL NO! What is Ka- er I mean Glenn doing in his Sunday School trousers???? Actually he gave me joke – he gave Shane a letter of recommendation from The Undertaker????!!!! HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAH NOW THAT’S FUNNY!

Oh dear! Rusev with an ambush attack on Titus! He’s tryna take Titus out the game early! He put the belt in Titus face like ‘you never gonna get this sh!t!’ THAT’S how to build a US Title match!

mitb 2016

Ok let’s reunite The Shield!!!! Er… sort of!

Looks like Seth is not such a party pooper after all! He brought up all the good times! Got the crowd chanting Boo-tista, all sorts of sh!t!

Seth is giving Roman props! Why can’t you fans give him props! And Seth keeps it 100!

Great comeback promo by Roman!!!! You still not gonna give him props?

Even Deano just hit them with the warning! He could cash in his cheque and beat the both of em! He just hit the Dirty Deeds on Roman – BLAOW! Your dream match could well happen this Sunday at the Munny Innah Bank! It ain’t my dream match… my dream match happened April 1, 2012 in Miami FLORIDA! And it involved a special referee, a Cell and a man I hated in the attitude era and a man who is and always will ne the don of DONS!

GRANT BODY-P!

More flirting between Deano & Stephanie!!!! If anything happens… Renee Young… you know where to find me! On di twitter! @MZATheInfamous!

Question – if Paige keeps yelling ‘THIS IS MY HOUSE!’, does she pay the rent on that wrestling ring? Answers On A Postcard please!

OH SNAP!!!! Paige just pinned Charlotte! Right after Dana Brooke threw Charlotte’s fine self back in the ring! Get Paige a title match against Charlotte on Smackdown and make Paige lose! I wanna see Charlotte break the record of 301 days damnit! Then, I’ll long d!ck her, and break her ovaries!

GRANT BODY-P!

MUNNY INNAH BANK JUMP OFF MATCH! Sheamus Vs Apollo Crews! But Sheamus, kick down Wack Ryder’s teeth so far down his throat that Wack Ryder can’t say WOO WOO WOO any more!

Apollo Crews just rushed Sheamus!!!! He went in and beat out his blodclart!

Good lord what a counter technique into a sunset flip pin by Zayn! Even Cesaro wasn’t ready for that sh!t! Now to those who say wrestling is ‘dying’, get out the attitude era and shut the f**k up! In fact go to your room! Go and watch E3 or something…

GRANT BODY-P!!!

ufc20 mitb

FOR REAL???? This match is 15 years in the making? THE WWE GUY VS THE TNA GUY! It’s a contract signing!!! WrestleMania quality according to Mike Cole! Yeah man forget Las Vegas, let’s go back to Dallas Texas! Fill that muthaf***a up to 100,000+ again! Let’s do this WrestleMania 32.5 sh!t!!! Cena mentioning all other promotions where Styles won more than 15 championships! All we need is Undertaker! Brock Lesnar! Triple TEEF! The Rock! Goldberg!

Oh snap! There are two contracts… if AJ Styles signs the one with The Club at ringside… but he would be a member of the B!TCH CLUB! Cena you outta order & bright!

WHOA! AJ STYLES claims he would have been the man if he was in the WWE 15 years ago! I’m not so sure AJ because that dirty Triple Teef was the champ with Evolution! You probably would have been on Smackdown or something! You gotta keep it real yo!

Check it out! If Kevin Owens and Bertie cannot co-exist, then the Lucha Dragons would take their place in the munny innah bank ladder match! Oh well Lucha fans, you can have hope right?

Hang on – Kevin Owens was gonna walk out the match? I thought he wanted the briefcase? every week he’s like – That’s MY CONTRACT!

So hold on… Zayn is on commentary, Kevin Owens wants in, Bertie finds himself as timekeeper, so does that make Cesaro the special guest referee for this Deano vs Jericho match?

Nope – he gonna be the ring announcer… No Shane!!!! Referee would have been so much better!

Looks like Glenn is out of the running to run Smackdown as well… I don’t know why Shane didn’t put the testicle incident behind him – he’s a proud father of three isn’t he???

GRANT BODY-P!

Kevin Owens chatting a bit too much, and Deano slaps the headphones off Owens headtop!

We knew ruckus would break loose, but Cesaro is a joker isn’t he? fighting in his good suit and dark glasses like his name is Agent Smith!

Meanwhile Jericho climbs the ladder and claims the briefcase! Problem is, it was on RAW… YOU STUPID IDIOT!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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Monday Night Raw #1197, May 2, 2016

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

you’re the best!
Around!
Nothing’s gonna ever keep you down
You’re the Best!
Around!
Nothing’s gonna ever keep you down
You’re the Best!
Around!
Nothing’s gonna ever keep you dow-ow-ow-ow-own!!!!

I stand before you a man with a headache. You know those headache’s you actually enjoy, because you just celebrated history been made. Leicester’s premiership victory was like the Karate Kid fairytale. It was like the Redman & Method Man concert in Birmingham O2 Institute last week. It was like The Undertaker when he hit 21-0 against CM Princess Peach B!tch… (the sweetest streak victory in my opinion!) You know the women of Leicester are getting the most sex this week!

GRANT BODY-P!

In other news, Roman Reigns is STILL your World Wrestling Federation Champion! And oh yeah – SHUDDUP!

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RAW #1197! By the way did I mention The Ryback is my favourite wrestler now??? HAHAHAHAHA GRANT BODY-P!

WWF PROPA TINGZStephanie you sexy as f**k but what’s in the bag? You bought the Infamous Informer something? a PS4 with Street Fighter V? You’re too kind!

Oh it’s for Shane… oh snap it’s that picture frame that Vincent Kennedy broke! Sheeeet – hang it up Shane (the picture that is!)

I don’t exactly understand why Kevin Owens wants to re-focus on the Intercontinental Championship… at the same time, I understand that Money Innah Bank soon come.

Where are the Gucci shoes Mr Cesaro??? Aaah sh!t he makes a case about been screwed out the Intercontinental Championship! LET’S DO THIS SH!T! Winner becomes #1 contender!

Don’t start the match yet – let me grab my pizzas from out the oven!

Oh dear – if The Miz & Maryse are gonna be so annoying at ringside, then no wonder Kevin Owens and Cesaro had to uppercut the glasses off Miz’s Money Maker! Sami Zany gets involved, then holds the Intercontinental Title in the air, and the spirit of Danny Bryan is felt in St Louis!

Meanwhile…Stephanie McMahon is seen flirting with Deano… and in the Ambrose Asylum… she says Deano can ask her anything… ANYTHING??? Deano rustling his hands like ‘now you’re talking’! GOD DAYUUUUUM! The first question I’d ask her.. is ‘can I get some pu$$y???’

GRANT BODY-P!

Oh hell naw they gonna team R-Truth with Tyler Battybwoy? I’m surprised Goldust doesn’t fancy him… Oh no he found a tag team partner… what a downgrade… Fandango went from Summer Rae… to an upgrade in Layla (which I might add – got Fandango on my bad side eternally) to Rosa Mendes, to Goldust???? This is the part where I take a long sheeeeet!

You can watch this video while I’m gone…

Yeah I know… random…

Due to Enzo being shut down temporarily, Big Cass becomes a New Day member for the week! That is cool! Now beat down these Vaudevillian fools! (the Dudley Boyz are not fools though…) It is a real shame that the tournament sponsored by Booty-Os got shut down like that.

This match is cool but where’s my favourite wrestler – The Ryback????!!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

You know it would have been a mark out moment if Roman Reigns said ‘The question is, can the three of you take on the three of us?’ And instead of the Usos, Rollins and Ambrose appeared… but that can wait!

Oh snap! I wasn’t gonna write about this but Emma defeated Becky Lynch! WHOA! They are really changing sh!t up aren’t they!GRANT BODY PHENOM

HERE WE GO!!!!! This is what I came to see! Nope – not Ric Flair – not the Ryback – but the Ambrose Asylum! Do us proud Deano! Ask Steph the dirtiest questions!!!

Maybe he won’t… I mean… Renee Young though… and she wears a B.I.G. t-shirt…

Hmmm why is Stephanie acting so nice all of a sudden???? And is Deano playing mind games here?

Oh snap! Stephanie can’t cancel the Ambrose Asylum???? And she brought back the Highlight reel? But Steph – Jericho cusses you on a regular basis! Er… I don’t understand this!

FOR REAL! Titus O’Neill is back! He won’t touch Vincent Kennedy again! And there’s no League of Nations! and Baron Corbin enters the arena! There’s my champion! It would have been Titus but…

Battle Royal US title jump off! Winner fights Kalisto!

Hold up – Apollo Crews is in there! Er… I change my pick!

Wait a minute – Corbin is eliminated by Ziggler, and Apollo Crews eliminated by Sheamus… that makes things interesting!

Oh dear! Zack Ryder getting stamped out by the… can I call em League of Nations??? I could for about 20 seconds!

Ryder & Rusev – last guys in the battle royal! COME ON RUSEV! Don’t let this fool win! Rusev has DONE IT! Here comes Lana with her sexy @$$! Get back the title and start the second reign of terror!

Calling it now – Rusev defeats Kalisto… then John Cena comes back on Memorial Day because Lana & Rusev start calling the crowd ‘Stupid Americans!’ Just like that – Cena drops the AA on Rusev again and then the John Cena invitational starts again! Remember I told ya!

GRANT BODY-P!

OH NO! Turns out that Charles Robinson is apart of the Flair family! Lil’ Naitch! TEEEEEEEEF!!! It all comes together now! There’s something about that leggy Charlotte… ah that’s right – it IS her legs! You know I have a weakness for women with long legs! I gotta a song for you Charlotte and your long legs… it goes a lil something like this… bring your sexy legs here…

She keeps looking at me
So now she gon’ get it
She want it
And by the wonderful moaning
That makes a beautiful night, baby
What a beautiful life, baby!

GRANT BODY-P!

Uh oh – somebody is bex! I don’t think Nattie has come out to ch… or maybe she has… oh no she’s out to cuss Ric! Take it easy Nattie!

Why has Ric Flair took off his jacket???!!!! NO! Nattie put Ric in the sharpshooter! Watch his ticker! Because when the clock goes tick…

I smell an I Quit match between Nattie & Charlotte at the Extreme Rules joint! Don’t you!

Ok – I can ryde to a submission match… but Ric Flair banned from ringside? No Stephanie that’s preposterous! You need to re-think this!

Ok main event jump off! The Roman Empire Vs The Bullet Club! AAHHH SH!T It’s about to go down!

Bullet Club wins the ruckus! But Styles ain’t tryna use the steel chair! But he used it on the Usos! Roman saw it! Oh dear Styles you gonna get f**ked up!

OH SNAP!!! Roman sets Styles up, powerbomb through the table! BLAOW!!!! GOOD LORD! You don’t f**k with Roman’s fam!

Roman haters I put this to you… If you saw somebody beating on your family, would you or would you not snap and beat out that person’s blodclart? If you still boo Roman – YOU’RE THE ONE WITH THE PROBLEM!

SALUTE. GRANT BODY-P!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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COMBAT  SPORT

 

Monday Night Raw #1196, April 25, 2016!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

What the f**k is going on I can’t go to sleep,

Eddie’s mamacita is gone I couldn’t go to sleep,

First the king, then the queen, now the prince it’s hard to go to sleep,

Me and ‘Mrs Jones’ don’t have a thing going on I can’t go to sleep…

Shout out to ‘Mrs Jones’… she knows who she is… hell, she’s not even a wrestling fan so she won’t be reading this… but STC’s Susan Brunton might have an idea who she is, hell – she was in her class back in school days… I’m just thinking back 20 years ago how things might have been in an alternate world… the way we were?? Me & ‘Mrs Jones’ would have at least 6 kids by now!

GRANT BODY-P!

In other news, fans are anticipating how RAW is gonna start this week… will we see a video package dedicated to Chyna? Will the bell toll 10 times? Or will it just be one screen saying Joanie Laurer 1969 – 2016… whatever WWE does, it’s bound to be met with scrutiny…

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RAW #1196! It’s a Great Day In the Mourning! TIME TO GET PAYBACK!

WWF PROPA TINGZWhoa… no 10 bell salute… yo my hands are clean, maybe it’s a good idea to turn off every notification in wrestling groups… yep… I have assignments to complete! And I will have seen Method Man & Redman live…

So much for ‘not sticking around’… see that’s what happens when you believe the dirty dirt sheets! Shane gonna jump off the show!

UH-OH!!!! Look who is here! Stephanie!!!! Oh no… don’t tell me she gonna be like ‘get the hell out of my ring!!!!’

Oh no! Stephanie is a Hartford baby!!! Put some respeck on her name!!!!

Vincent Kennedy is gonna decide if Shane or the Authority gonna run RAW! Oh no… that Triple TEEF is gonna come back with his hammer at the Payback joint!

SWITCH! Shane sent security after Stephanie and dashed her out the building! yes he can so that – he’s still in charge at least til Payback!

So good to hear Sheamus music entrance again… unless they can turn this League of Nations rubbish around then I say shut it down…

Catch the outfits of Gallows & Anderson! They mean business!!!! Someone getting f**ked up on RAW I can assure you!

OH NO! The New Day quoted Birdman and Prince! Leave it to the hottest faces in the company! Wait a minute – the Vaudevillians say they gonna party like it’s 1899???? They can’t do that! I bet Enzo & Cass gonna party like it’s 2099! And you can’t teach that muthaf***a!

Look at The New Day loving this!!!! Doesn’t matter who wins…. the fans win here!!!

Ok Usos… you guys are great and always are… but the Bullet club mans are gonna destroy you! My advice…Just stick and move… wear them down… use the distraction roll up and get the f**k outta there!

What do I know? I’m just a fan who has never laced a pair of boots and always got food by my side watching this wrestling sh!t on a computer! The difference between me & you? I make this look good!

GRANT BODY-P!

“They (Gallows, Anderson, AJ Styles) were part of a ‘club’ down there (Japan)”… that’s it go ahead and complain that Mike Cole is told not to address them as the ‘bullet club’! Knock yourself out! I should be watching this match examining their fighting style, and there is ‘bullet club’ chants from the Hartford Connecticut crowd!

The Bullet Club, ready to finish the Uso brudda… and Roman Reigns came through and rushed the ring! He’s still about that injustice!

***the remainder of this blog will be caught up on WWE.Com, since the stream decided to f**k up… and that’s not good… I got such a busy week! Yes it’s assignment week, and you know how that is!***

Payback434

Check it out! Lana is back with Rusev at ringside! But now I’m playing catch up, so answers on a postcard please – did Lana tell the fans to SHUT-TUP??? Did she signal for the Rusev Crush? And did she do this pictured below?

Lana stretch

Because if she didn’t… that’s why Rusev lost to Sami Zayn!!!! Sorry Melina, you have been dethroned as the most flexible woman in WWE history!

I’m sorry, I just can’t help but think that Stardust Vs Apollo Crews is this generation’s Goldust Vs Ahmed Johnson…

goldust-ahmed-johnson-mouth-to-mouth

…and if you remember that feud… you would be glad that the product today is now PG!

GRANT BODY -P!

“What do I do? I win matches, I make history, I demand respect…”  Sounds like Jericho is on that delusional birdbwoy sh!t too!

Dean Ambrose should kneel down and kiss Jericho’s $1500 boots? One, the boots look bruk down, my trainers are in better condition! And I’ve had them for two years! And two, this ain’t 1995 fool!!!

Well Jericho demanded an apology right? Well in true WWE Attitude style (gasp!! he said it!! -) Get over yourself jabroni – Deano apologized for whuppin Jericho’s @$$!

THE WALLS OF JERICHO ON THE ANNOUNCE TABLE!!!  THE WALLS OF JERICHO ON THE ANNOUNCE TABLE!!! Ooooooh that’s gotta be extra painful I mean… it’s on the ANNOUNCE TABLE! Quick! Call the ambulance to come and pick up the people!

HAHAHAHAHA That dutty Ric Flair! He likes what he sees! And I’m not talking about the wrestling contest! I’m talking about Emma! He looks like he wants some of that flamin’ gallar!GRANT BODY PHENOM

GRANT BODY -P!

Natalya makes Emma tap out to the sharpshooter! Charlotte doesn’t look impressed! I’ll tell who does look impressed – RIC FLAIR! Not only does he want the flamin gallar, he wants some Canadian Maple Syrup!!!!

I’m calling it now – The Miz & Rusev will feud somwhere down the road. The fact of the matter is this – we all love Lana. Lana & Rusev gonna turn face at some point remember I told ya… if Maryse is looking to get physical I can definitely see it coming…

“I am used to being criticized by the faceless, nameless, anonymous internet trolls and tough guys…” WHOA!!!!! Mike Mizanin I’m gonna put some RESPECK ON YOUR NAME!

So Cesaro thinks he’s some James Bond figure? The women love the Swiss Superman! I think it’s cheesy (oh wait – get it!!!) but hey… it works so run with it!

These guys using cheesy movie quotes and sh!t! They would have fit well at WrestleMania 21… All those classic movie sketches they did? That was cool… even Undertaker did one!

AAAAAH SH!T I was hoping Cesaro would havbe took the challenge! Could he giant swing The Miz with Maryse laid on top of him sideways??? Best save that for WrestleMania 33 right??!!!

Haha Cesaro held the IC belt high, gave it back to Maryse, left the rng and fixed his jacket! SUPERB!

Before we head into Roman Reigns Vs Bertie, let’s take a look at Chyna’s career…

Big respect to Chyna, she set off a lot of sh!t broke down walls… I mean, first Royal Rumble entrant as a female, first female intercontinental champion… and she re-invented the kick in the d!ck (Shout out to STC’s Nicola Hardwick!) If only Chyna kicked death in the d!ck…

#LIVEONLIVELONG

Roman Reigns shows that distraction roll ups don’t work on him! Sorry Bertie, the Bullet Club’s appearance is not enough! Use all your skills!

Where the Uso’s at???? Get out here and help your cuzo! Yo Jimmy! Send Naomi to me I GOT THIS!

GRANT BODY-P!

This is so interesting! AJ Styles is like – nah nah I got this!  But Roman is keeping his wits about him! Superman Punch to Styles – BLAOW! Bullet Club back in… putting the beatdown to Reigns, then Styles comes through with the phenomenal forearm – BLAOW!

OH SNAP! I think Finn Balor trolled you jabronies! Lost his title and told you ‘see you Monday…’ so there you were jerking off and look what happen! He could have meant another NXT signing! He could have meant see you down at the coffee shop! He could have meant – see you at O2 Academy Birmingham for the Redman & Method Man show!

SALUTE. GRANT BODY-P!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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Monday Night Raw #1191, March 21, 2016!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

I stand before you an ashamed wrestling fan. Yeah I said it. I am disgusted to be apart of this community. I put it to you. I’m not a father but I am a proud uncle. Suppose one day I decided to take my niece and nephew to a local indie wrestling show, and the performers act like they gonna drop the people’s elbow but instead takes down his draws and reveals his sexual reproductive system for everyone to see, knowing that it’s filmed? Doesn’t look good does it? SORT YOUR SH!T OUT JABRONIES!

In other news, Sting denies any form of retirement… at least for now… looks like my STC From The UK co-host’s celebrations were premature…

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW #1191! Have you heard of Fifth Harmony? Nah, me neither, but I googled em… they can come to WrestleMania ANYTIME!

WWF PROPA TINGZI wonder why Stephanie looks so happy? Oh yeah I forgot – I GOT IN THAT PU$$Y And turned into the chojin!!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

Oh dear Triple is not at RAW! We got 60 seconds to get refund! I didn’t put my hand in my pocket – did you???

Sheeeet! Roman Reigns doesn’t come down the stairs anymore! You jabronies hope he turns heel… I told you last week – ABANDON HOPE! What you think he’s gonna do – I already beat up Stephanie’s pum-pum!

How did Roman Reigns manage to silence Stephanie??? I mean I was gonna use a pillow but…

Stephanie tried to slap him! Roman used his kung fu and blocked it! “Now I’m the authority!”

You are still deluded… aren’t you? How is a ‘Double Turn’ (between Reigns & Triple) gonna work? Please wrestling fans… USE YOUR BENEFIT OF INTELLECT!

Crack open the Jaffa Cakes and the Supermalt – AJ Styles vs Kevin Owens! Y’all ready for some wrestling??? Sure you are… LET’S DO THIS SH!T!

How did Styles kick out of Kevin Owens frog splash? Er it’s very simple really… he used his chi and wrestling instincts and combined his mental and physical prowess and kicked out at 2! YES AJ Styles can do it too muthaf***a!

How does chanting for AJ Styles make you LOSE the match? If you are not the fans and you are Chris Jericho! You guys need to sort a stipulation for this sh!t!

Where is Ziggler going? In fact where is The Miz going? All of a sudden these muthaf***az wanna test Kevin Owens for the Intercontinental Title? I thought Sami Zayn had beef with Owens?

Here he is! Mr Zayn! Ok just throw all these muthaf***az in a ladder match for big BIG WrestleMania!

Well KO is hoping that those three jabronies can battle it out for the chance… Well, Ziggler, Zayn and Miz could make for a fantastic contest!

Talking of jabronies… are you STILL negative about WrestleMania??? Are you still throwing ignorant memes? Well meme no more… first Mick Foley gives Deano a bat with barbed wire, now Terry Funk gives Deano a chainsaw???? Er Brock… I never thought I’d say this but… YUH GOOSE COOK!

Is it me or Kevin Owens sound intimidated when he was speaking to Stephanie? HAHAAHAHA!

New Day Rocks so much that even the League of Nations have to laugh at their promos! New Day Killing em! They just said to Sheamus – they could have named him ‘Stephen’! Er… that IS HIS NAME RIGHT??!!!

Oh no! As Rusev is getting beat down by Big E, Xavier sends for Francesca II! I think it’s safe to say that the New Day have turned face under our noses folks!

Wait a minute… Vincent Kennedy has an announcement regarding Hell In Ah Cell? Ok this is the part where I get nervous… not around the Wyatt fools though… they talking sh!t as usual…sounds like at least for the moment, Braun Strowman wants to test Deano… if Deano is bringing his new gifts with him, Braun Strowman will become Doodoo Brown Strowman!

GRANT BODY-P!

Big BIG WrestleMania 32 LOGO

By calling yourselves ‘Voltron’ Social Outcasts… you have insulted the Wu-Tang Clan. That is something you just don’t do!

NOW Look what you done! FYYYYRE!!! IT’S KANE!!!! Dashed those Social idiots out! Then chokeslammed The Big show from the top ropes – BLAOW! There’s my dude for the Andre the Giant Battle Royal jump off this year!

WHAAAART? Fandango still works here? I suppose he gotta get that WrestleMania money… that’s it Jericho…. KILL HIM… wouldn’t it be crazy if AJ Styles came out chanting ‘Y2J’ and throw him off his game and have Fandango win? It would be HUGE!

WHOA!!! What the rarse did I just say! AJ Styles chants ‘Y2JACK@$$!’ but Jericho was still able to win… come on now stipulation!!!!

“I’d love to see that at WrestleMania…” NO YOU DON’T MIKE COLE! You saw it already how many blodclart times!

Yo they are hyping up this Hell In A Cell match with all these promos and what both Shane and Undertaker can do… aaaah sh!t the hype is real people! Whoever Loses – I WIN! Shane wins… he takes control of the company. Undertaker wins, I TAKE CONTROL of theGrant Body Pcompany! Whatever the outcome… I WIN!!!!

Hold up – How come Kevin Owens is switching this up! How come he’s announcing Stardust, Sin Cara & Zack Ryder???

Uh-Oh! Sami Zayn gonna deal with the case! Miz & Ziggler are on their way too! Yes – throw the lot of em in the ladder match! DO IT STEPHANIE!

Everybody needs a WrestleMania pay check right???

Calling it now – Either Owens will retain, or Sami Zayn becomes the next Intercontinental champion…. the feud will continue into a personal one on one situation between the two at the Backlash joint. (Extreme Rules Grant) – yeah yeah I know! For those jabronies who think Zack Ryder gonna win… ABANDON HOPE!

Check it out, Stephanie calls Triple to pick her up, they about to leave the building. Just as the car pulls off, look who’s waiting… Roman Reigns! He wants to beat down Triple’s Blodclart! Roman is so lucky it wasn’t 15 years ago when Triple had 10 men behind him! But makes his escape! He gonna get his hammer for sure!

So while Natalya and Charlotte compete in the ring, and Sasha and Becky are squabbling on commentary, lets throw up a pic of my wife who got away… look at her soul glow!

Naomi glow

While R-Truth fights Bubba Ray Dudley, we got breaking news from the bossman of the BDSIR NETWORK – MIKE KNOXXX! He has a special interview with the man called Kevin Owens! The World Wrestling Federation Intercontinental Champion! It is a CANNOT MISS episode! Tuesday 5pmEST 9pmUK – DROP THE BOMB ON EM! (Download links available after the show!)

Mike Knoxxx KO

UH-OH!!! VINCENT KENNEDY IS HERE!!! This is it… this is where I get nervous with the announcement…

WHOA! Shane could be Undertaker’s most formidable WrestleMania opponent??? More than Brock? Triple? MICHAELS???? Are you sure Vince?

Now Vincent Kennedy has said it now! Vince’s b!tch? If Undertaker doesn’t win, it will be his ‘last’ WrestleMania??? What does that mean? Undertaker retires? Or Undertaker just cannot compete at WrestleMania? Oh F**k… I knew this was gonna happen!

Suddenly I cannot write anymore… give me a moment… or a week for that matter…

SALUTE. GRANT BODY-P!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

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Monday Night Raw #1182, January 18, 2016!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

Aaaaaah sh!t! It’s about that time where Facebook’s #1 wrestling group leaves their keyboards, their HiPhones, their gidgets gadgets behind, come together and gather for the rumble… the ROYYYYAL RUMBLLLLLLLE!!! 30 men, The World Wrestling Federation Championship, somebody will be the champion and headline WrestleMania! Somebody in the Smack Talk Centre will be at least £30 richer, and the prestigious Smack Talk Centre Championship is on the line! Who gonna look good in their outfit?

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But before that, who you backing? who you think gonna win the rumble? Is AJ Styles & Co gonna appear? WELL DON’T GET GASSED! YOU are to blame if they don’t appear and you get angry… NOT MY PROBLEM!

GRANT BODY -P!

Find out on this week’s STC From The UK Show! Saturday 5pm UK 12noon EST! On BDSIR NETWORK – The Best Damn Show In Radiaaah!!!

RAW #1182! I am the Infamous Informer, Don’t get my hands dirty, I got goons that spray, quick to kill a motherf****r, like BOOM BYE YEAH!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZI HAVE A DREAM! That one day, Internet Wrestling Know It Alls would stop reading dirt shets, buying into everything they read, then throw wobblys because Cesaro isn’t pushed to the main event….

I HAVE A DREAM! That one day, Jimmy Uso will give Naomi a free pass, and she will travel here to the UK, find the Infamous Informer, and throw on some Raphael Saadiq, Backs Dat @$$ Up and allows him to give her one piece of sweet loving!

GRANT LUTHER KING!

Roman Reigns has come down the stairs! Brock Lesnar caused an injustice! He calls out Brock, but gets Jericho!

Jericho is inviting Reigns to come on the Highlight Reel with Brock! Well Jericho, prepare to have your Jeritron 65000 destroyed!!! That thing is going over somebody’s headtop surely!

Look at these League of Nation fools… they want in to the highlight reel… they all claim they gonna win the Rumble… as usual – we ALL wanna win the Rumble! Sh!t I wanna win the Rumble! But if those lights go out and the bell tolls… f**k that – over the top rope I go – ME GONE! (What about Brock Grant?) Oh I’ll hide underneath the ring until he’s gone!

After all that chatting… Roman Reigns Fights Rusev! Jericho is now the guest referee! Just like HBK… I don’t trust that Jericho! It’s one Vs all right? Roman Reigns watch your back rude boy!

Wait a minute – League of Nations at ringside??? TEEEEEEEF!!!! The ref should run them out the arena! But it’s Jericho, he wouldn’t do that… he’d rather beat out their blodclart himself!

High risk maneuver coming up – Rusev tries a Samoan Drop off the top ropes, Reigns counters – sit out power bomb to Rusev – BLAOW!!!!

Sheamus tried to teef – Jericho caught him! GET THE F**K OUTTA HERE! Barrett tries to reason with his big nose – COME OUT! Jericho is law & order! Bertie tries to reason… he’s out as well! Jericho doing the cartwheel while he’s doing it! Roman hits the superman punch and the spear to Rusev… BLAOW! 1….2…and….3!!!! League of WHAT? F**KOUTTAHERE!

Look at the chemistry between Jericho and Stephanie… god damnit Jericho wants to f**k her bad! You can see it in his face! I mean… one of these days… I will interview Jericho, and I want the TRUTH!

Look who’s back! Natalya! look at her suit – she got no draws on underneath that! So is Paige! Urgh… I still hate that b!tch! Natalya fighting Brie – you know it’s all about the Total Divas – THEY’RE BACK BABY!

Total Divas - Season 5

 

TOTAL DIVAS — Season: 5 — Pictured: “Total Divas” Season 5 Key Art — (Photo by: E! Entertainment)

6 of the 8 women would get the D from me… one of em is obvious but can you guess the other one? Answers on a postcard – tweet me @MZATheInfamous!

GRANT BODY -P!

While the Dudleys and Ryback are fighting each other in six man tag competition… just to confirm – Natalya had NO DRAWS ON! Something has happened to that woman…it’s

Natalya - No draws

Photo courtesy of that dutty bwoy Steadx!

almost as if Nikki passed the freaky baton on to Natalya! A Lie Me Ah Tell?

Not these blasted Social Outcasts… Big Show just punch all four of these jabronies through school buses!

Curtis Axel still on that Royal Rumble 2015 sh!t… can this fool enter the Rumble at #1 so that the #2 entrant can eliminate his blodclart?

GRANT BODY-P!

Aaaaaah sh!t – Stephanie injecting a lethal dose of TEEEEEF into the League of Nations! Come on guys??? a a King of the Ring Winner, a 40 man Royal Rumble winner and a former World Wrestling Federation Champion running scared of Jericho??? Stephanie just told them to f**k him up!

It’s kinda funny how Stephanie tells Jericho how it’s not 1999 anymore… I remember what happened in 1999, don’t you wrestling fans???!!!

For real Vincent Kennedy? 30 balls in that muthaf***a? And Roman Reigns gotta go first??? In the interest of fairness, they did try it 3 times… and it was… ROMAN REIGNS!!!! TEEEEEEEEEEEEF! Come on Roman – it can be done!!!! Gotta look strong right??!!!

Side note – Stephanie teasing the WWE Universe on some ‘somebody we haven’t seen before’ to win the Rumble or become #1 entrant… referring to AJ Styles & The Bullet Club or Nakumara? You should be so lucky… SHUT THE F**K UP!

GRANT BODY -P!

I am himBecky Lynch faces off against my girl Tamina…changed her music too… argh man you mean they couldn’t use the Busta Rhymes tune – I Love My B!tch????!

It’s official – 2 of the three members of Team BAD are out here… Sasha Banks is out the game… god damnit… just when Team BAD’s creative vaginal juices were about to flow…

GRANT BODY-P!!

Meanwhile Kevin Owens is trying to show Mike Cole how to do it on commentary… don’t do it too well Owens! F**k around and Vincent Kennedy will have you there pernamently like he tried with Randy Savage!

I know the New Day did not just hold a service for Franchesca the Trombone! All three guys dressed in black! Look what you have done Jericho! YOU MURDERER! I mean, what you did makes Chris Benoit look like an angel! How can WWE allow this man (Jericho) to be on TV??? They should erase him from history! HE KILLED A TROMBONE PEOPLE! While you jabronies pay to see him and his Fozzy jabronies singing nonsense and making unnecessary noise with the guitar??? WAKE UP PEOPLE! Cut off the funding towards his podcasts!

The New Day will exact their revenge, starting with The Uso brudda… they will fight for the Tag Titles… but they don’t have Franchesca… it cannot simply be replaced???

Whoa Whoa Whoa! Hold up – Mark Henry, Titus & R-Truth  – is that another team about to brew??? They have a dream.. and so does Neville! They will one day become World Wrestling Federation Champion! Sometimes guys, I like all of you but… dreams are just that – A DREAM!

They are up against The Ascension, Tyler Breeze and Stardust – with all these 4 man teams going on, can’t we have the Survivor Series as the next PPV? Do that traditional 4 vs 4 sh!t???

I’m gonna call this team – TEAM MLK… they all mashed up Tyler Breeze with their super moves! BALL GAME! Yo Tyler… NXT is THAT WAY! I don’t care how good you are as a wrestler – you wear that frilly sh!t – I ain’t taking your b!tch @$$ seriously!

GRANT BODY – P!

Aaaah sh!t – Where’s the Jeritron 650000 at? Holy crap – Jericho just told Heyman to Shut The Hell Up??? Ok – dude is going to Suplex City!

Say what? Did Jericho just ask Heyman if he has no faith in Brock winning the Rumble? Good counter by Heyman – Lesnar never got pinned or submitted when he lost the title… Heyman promises Brock will turn the Rumble into Suplex City! But who gonna eliminate Brock? That’s what I wanna know!

Jericho is sure of himself isn’t he? He really thinks he can throw Lesnar out the Rumble! It’s almost as if Jericho heard me ask the question! So did Brock by the sounds of things!

I think Roman heard me too! He’s coming down the stairs! The man who laughed in Suplex City!!!! I hope that tatical vest plays well Roman!

Reigns hit the spear to Lesnar – BLAOW! But the League of nations rushed the ring! I don’t know why… as Lesnar mashed them all up! But Reigns comes with another spear – BLAOW! Next minute the Wyatt man come! Check this out – they f**ked up Lesnar! You think they gonna take him away and harvest his powers too?

SH!T! The Wyatt Family killed muthaf***az like BOOM BYE YEAH!!!

SEE YOU AT RILEY’S SPORTS BAR WOLVERHAMPTON THIS SUNDAY MUTHAF***AZ!

SEE YOU AT RILEY’S SPORTS BAR WOLVERHAMPTON THIS SUNDAY MUTHAF***AZ!

SALUTE. GRANT BODY-P!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

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NEW STC LOGO 2015

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Reproduced by kind permission of the Infamous Informer by www.cageamateursuk.com

Monday Night Raw #1180, January 4, 2016!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

Show Charlie Murphy your titties

The realization just hit me.  Next Monday… It’s the Infamous Informer’s birthday! LAYDEEZ!!! Show Mike Dogg your t!tt!£$!! I think I should have a week off don’t you? F**k that – I GOTTA WORK! I want to continue entertaining you readers! But I warn you.. if you don’t see next week’s blog for some reason… that’s because either Jimmy Uso gave Naomi her ‘free pass’ or… The Infamous Informer is sexing your chick while you’re complaining on the internet about Roman Reigns!

GRANT BODY -P!

RAW #1180! LETS GET THAT 2016 FLOW! HOL’DAT – BLAOW!

WWF PROPA TINGZWell Stephanie doesn’t look too happy… but look who’s waiting at the stairs! Roman Reigns! Stephanie is talking calm… oooooooooh…that’s not good! She says she gonna make him suffer and fight for no reason until his body is destroyed! Roman says he’s gonna put a 70 year old man in Vincent Kennedy in the hospital if he f**ks with his title!!!! The question is out there!!! What is gonna happen in the title match? The Grant says this… it looks like Roman gonna f**k up Vincent Kennedy… but TRIPLE TEEF comes back… and USES DA HAMMER!!! That’s why Stephanie is talking so calm! WATCH DA RYDE!

Oh snap! Neville Vs Kevin Owens again??? AAAH yeah again and again! Will Neville neat Owens again in record time? If he does he’d better run like he should have done last week! But wait! Ambrose is at ringside… maybe Neville doesn’t need to run!

Say what???? Brock Lesnar returns on the Infamous Informer’s Born day??? Sh!t… I don’t want birthday suplexes! I bet it was you internet b!tches told him about me…

What a nasty Spike DDT from the top rope from Owens! Neville neck should have broke! SH!T! But Neville was fist and fire all over Owens! mash-up ribs and all!

Kevin Owens is STILL DA MAN! Neville did the right thing this time… just take the loss, Owens will show mercy….

Ooops! maybe not! Owens still wanted to beatdown Neville! Ambrose is having none of it! Deano, set up Owens on the announce table… Deano runs round the barricade, elbow drop to Owens through the table – BLAOW!!! And Deano grips the headpiece of Owens as if to say – DON’T F**K WITH ME!!!! Yo come the Intercontinental title match I don’t wanna see no basic singles match – these two guys are streetfighters! Take it back to the bars where the APA used to hang out!

AAAAAH SH!T! Vincent Kennedy is here! Yes, he broke the law last week, but this week, he IS THE LAW! Shout out to Motorhead!

Come on Titus! Brukk up that Stardust!!! Mash him up!!!! Beat out his blodclart!!!

Oh dear! Why doesn’t Stardust like when the crowd chant ‘Cody’??? I mean… the crowd are supporting him aren’t they??? They’re not? Oh dear….

The Clash of the Titus super move by O’Neill! BLAOW!!! Oh dear – Stardust is reading his own horoscope! It says – You got knocked the f**k out!

Looks like Becky & Charlotte gonna have another friendly wrestling contest…. YEAH RIGHT!!! Look at Ric Flair creep up behind Becky like – WOOOOOOOO!!! I’m telling you – he wants to f**k Becky!!! Yo Flair! The blue smarties is THAT WAY!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

Nice entrance by Becky!!! I mean, she always had it in the NXT… but it’s good to see it here!

Look at Ric Flair doing his strut while the ladies are having a sparring contest! I mean sh!t! I would! I don’t know what Charlotte has been spending her WWE divas champion money on – but she’s been looking fine lately!

Oh yeah! Ric Flair gonna be on the Austin podcast next week too! WWE is being GOOD TO ME!!! All I need is Naomi…

There’s a sign in the crowd saying ‘We Want Tamina’… So Do I!!!! Can’t I have all of TeamBAD for my Birthday next week???

Hold up – Becky grabbed the tights and beat Charlotte! Charlotte don’t like that sh!t because Becky was gloating in front of her father! Now Charlotte is beating down her so-called friend! Oh dear!

Did Sheamus just call Vincent Kennedy his ‘Irish cousin’??!!!! HAHAHA!!! How can you jabronies dislike Sheamus when he has a way with words? Oh I get it… he’s not CM P…. Can that be a New Years Resolution? To not mention that muthaf***a’s name??? It’s 2016! He’s not important to us! Unless it’s the YOU EFF CEE…

Ok I’m getting bored of wrestling match after wrestling match… The Ryback fights The Big Show… yes people… this came on last week… so I’m gonna take my medicine because The Grant is sick of this sh!t!!!! Give me a storyline segment already!

AAAH SH!T! Hold the medicine! Why The Wyatt man dem wanna f**k up Ryback? What’s this about???

Hold up – They got The Big Show too!!! This is what I don’t get – The Wyatts can’t harvest any power from Show and The Ryback so what are they tryna accomplish????

Aah yes… The Royal Rumble… But it’s every man for himself though right? 4 guys cannot go to WrestleMania???? Er…

Meanwhile Dolph Ziggler is hoping to punch his ticket to big BIG WrestleMania…haahahahaha The Grant says – He will have his best Rumble performance yet… but… DREAM… DREAM….DREAM….. I BROUGHT YOU ALL MY DREAMS!!!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!

Mike wake up – wha-what-What- yo Heath Slater beat Ziggler!!! BACKSIDE!!! And Slater has a new crew! No not the 4-man band… they are #SocialOutcasts… ok well… anyway…

Vincent Kennedy is giving me joke! Telling both Sheamus and Roman Reigns that it will be a fair contest!!! (YEAH RIGHT…!!!)

Thank you to STC’s David Connor Richardson… I could have done without that information, now I didn’t get to mark out that Chris Jericho turned up! Yes the ratings need a boost, network subscriptions need a boost… to do that Jericho all you have to do is tease Stephanie’s fine @$$… job done!

Aaah sh!t – Jericho gonna enter the Royal Rumble??? Well Jericho… your fate will be the same as Ziggler… DREAM…DREAM…DREAM… I BROUGHT YOU ALL MY DREAMS!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

Kalisto and the Dudley Boys combine their force to compete against the UpUpDownDown guys… I’m sure the trombone will get involved, but I wanna see Team BAD… can’t they interfere in this match or something and shake they @$$??WWE2K16 GRANT BODY -P!

That was a nasty splash off the apron to Kalisto from Big E! But whining up his waist in front of  a guy is not cool yo!!! If that was me I would have got on the mic and called out Team BAD! If they gave me the creative keys…Team BAD would be in BIG trouble!

HAHAHAHA!!! Vincent Kennedy with the power walk in his referee shirt! He could have done with a tan though… His old man body is starting to show!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

And the match is under way!!! I hope Vincent Kennedy calls it down the middle!!! But we both know that ain’t gonna happen!

Wait a minute… Sheamus used the stairs!! THAT’S TEEF! And Vincent Kennedy had his back turned!!! Hey Vince! You said no underhanded tactics!

Remember Roman! Don’t let Sheamus put you in the submission move! Vince is a very ‘inexperienced’ referee!!!

VINCENT KENNEDY TEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!! What sort of slow count was that??!!! Roman Reigns WILL f**k him up!!! But I’m sure that Triple Teef is behind the curtain with that hammer…

Reigns goes for the cover again… this time Vincent Kennedy needs eye drops! He is 70 after all!

Why did Roman hit the Superman Punch on Vincent Kennedy? How is he gonna win???

Stephanie gets involved too! And a crooked referee! Still waiting on that Triple Teef!!!

Somehow, Roman Reigns survives… but check this out… Vincent Kennedy flips the script! Roman Reigns must defend his title against 29 other men… er that’s right… The Royal Rumble is for the World Wrestling Federation Championship! That hasn’t been done since 1992!!! This has changed EVERYTHING!!! Er now is a good time to play that track Grant…

GRANT BODY-P!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

FOLLOW SMACK TALK CENTRE ON TWITTER

DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.

NEW STC LOGO 2015

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Gratefully reproduced by kind permission of The Infamous Informer at Smack Talk Centre RAW

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 Monday Night Raw #1177, December 14, 2015!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

Monday Night Raw #1177, December 14, 2015!!!

Roman Reigns Brukk up Triple Teef

GOOD GAWD ALMIGHTY!!!!

Let me tell you something… I am tired as a muthaf***a… Saturday night, I stayed up til 6am watching the UFC, glad that Weidman lost because in my eyes he NEVER defeated my hero Anderson Silva, The way Aldo lost erased what happened with Ronda Rousey. 13 seconds… BLAOW!!!

Then there was TLC… Naomi looked sexy as f**k, the Triple Threat ladder match… off the hook. Deano – NEW WORLD WRESTLING FEDERATION INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPION! But that Roman Reigns – that man was BEXXXXXXXX!!! I haven’t seen Triple Teef f**ked up like that since… Batista in the Hell in a Cell in 2005!

RAW #1177! WE GONNA HAVE OUR OWN GAME OF THRONES – BELIEVE THAT! HOL’DAT – BLAOW!

WWF PROPA TINGZAaaaah sh!t! Stephanie gonna start this sh!t… she cannot be happy at all… If I was Reigns, or Ambrose or the Usos for that matter… I’d probably prepare for a long night…

I suppose Roman Reigns wants Stephanie to say ‘YOU’RE FIRED’ to his face… is she gonna slap him? Makes me wonder if that is wise!

Look at Stephanie’s face!!!! Can looks kill Roman Reigns? That’s what I wanna know!

NO ROMAN! You can’t say it’s your daughter’s birthday???!! You can’t say you can’t wait to see her again? Oh my god you might have shot yourself in the foot here!

WHOA! He just called the McMahon family a DISGRACE!!! Yo Roman – you’re on your own kid!

Good lord! That was like 515 slaps to Roman’s cheekbone! But wanna hear a fate worse than death? A fate worse than being fired? VINCENT KENNEDY IS ON HIS WAY! Er… Roman – you have DONE IT NOW!

AAAH SH!T! Deano Vs Ziggler! This will be an epic contest!

Yo! The Slammy Awards is next week… get your vote on! But This Week on the BDSIR NETWORK – It’s the Smack Talk Centre Slammy Awards! The group has cast their votes, and the results are in! Tune in Saturday! 5pmUK 12pmEST – NOT TO BE MISSED!

http://www.facebook.com/groups/smacktalkcentre – REQUEST TO JOIN – DON’T BE A WEIRDO – DON’T DO IT!

Follow us – on the tweeter @stc_wwe!

And because I said ‘tweeter’, lets get a pic of Gabi Castrovinci from Tough Enough… for no reason!

Gabi Castronvinci

Without a doubt, a highlight of my journalistic career this year – interviewing this beautiful young woman… expect the unexpected muthaf***az!

Talking of expect the unexpected… Dolph Ziggler and Dean Ambrose just got buss arse by Kevin Owens! He’s not happy at all… he just powerbombed their blodclart for no reason! Well yes there was a reason – he lost his Intercontinental title and he is BEX! But why beef with Ziggler? Ziggler did nothing to him???

AAAAH SH!T!!! THIS ECW SH!T STARTED IN PHILLY! The Dudley Boyz, Rhyno and Tom Dreamer are gonna Bring Da Ruckus to the Wyatt Bwoy dem! YO!!! RAW has been OFF THE HOOK SO FAR!!!

Word up something must have happened back there in the creative team… the kick up the backside must have been serious!

OH SH!T! the limosuine has pulled up! Vincent Kennedy is HERE!!!! You know I’m sitting here in the UK and even I’m nervous! R-Truth and Bo Dallas have stopped fighting!

What the hell was the camera crew thinking giving Vincent Kennedy an ordinary steel chair! Did you see how he kicked it out their hand and said – “GIMME THAT CHAIR!!!” pointing to the leather rocking chair!

Roman Reigns knows he’s in trouble – check it – he’s not coming down the stairs this time! It’s down the ramp! I’m gonna pray for him seriously!

Vincent kennedy wants Reigns to get down on his hands and knees to apologise! Is he gonna join the Vince McMahon kiss My @$$ club???

No way!!! HE’S 70 YEARS OLD ROMAN! DON’T DO IT!!!

Saved by Sheamus… thank goodness… crowd chanting – ‘you look stupid’… Sheamus is right – YOU THE FANS pay your money to see him…

CHECK IT!!! Vincent Kennedy has granted a World Wrestling Federation Championship Match! Roman Reigns Vs Sheamus! But if Reigns doesn’t win…

…and Vincent Kennedy kicks Roman in the D!CK! Oh man! STC’s Nicola Hardwick is gonna be distraught about that surely!

PRAY FOR ROMAN PEOPLE… CHANGE YOUR FACEBOOK PROFILE PICS TO ROMAN….

GRANT BODY-P!!!

Ryback – you might as well have went out there by yourself against Bertie and Rusev… they just mash-up Wack Swagger! Why do you chant – We The People? You The People can’t do sh!t! I the Infamous Informer MAKES SH!T HAPPEN!

GRANT BODY-P!!!

Hold up? Someone told me that Neville was on the NXT tour in the UK! What’s he doing on RAW??? Damn that plane did some serious flying!

HERE WE GO!!!! Extreme Rules up in this biatch! I wanna see tables! chairs! a 2×4 with barbed wire! Tables on fire! FYRE! (PG GRANT ) – AAAAAAAAHHHH SH!T!!!!

Come on Rhyno!!! I want him to GORE somebody’s blodclart!

The Dudleys brukking up the Wyatt man dem! They mash up Rowan’s family jewels! Just as well, he probably has sex with goats and sh!t!

GRANT BODY-P!!!

They hit the superplex/bomb on Luke Harper!!! Right on the chair – BLAOW! BACK BRUKK!

“NOW WE ARE HOME! WHERE WE BELONG!!!” D-Von is in his element!!!

MUTHAF**KA!!! Tommy Dreamer just dropped Luke Harper through the tables off the stage! He just showed Cena how to do it!!!

Tommy Dreamer! Attacking Strowman with the kendo stick! Strowman grabs him, charges him through the barricade!

The Dudley Boyz! Drop the 3D on Harper through a table! BLAOW!!!

But Rhyno, went for the GORE, but got kicked in his head! Rhyno now, set up on the table, Eric Rowan, jumps off the top ropes – splashes Rhyno through the table – BLAOW!!

What a match, that match right there, might have been better than the entire Extreme Rules PPV this year! Team ECW lose but Paul Heyman must be proud wherever he’s at in the world!

OH NO!!! The New Day are here!!!! Just when Raw couldn’t get any better this week! They got something to say… uh-oh…

Wait a minute… you don’t think The New Day are gonna give The Uso brudda props as is the Lucha Dragons? I man, Xavier hasn’t got his trombone…

Well I thought that was sincere! But then The New Day continued their celebrations! Come on Usos! Lucha Dragons! Have a heart!

Now this is what I came to see! Brie Bella & Alicia Fox fight Charlotte & Becky Lynch…but check it – my girls Team BAD have brought a ticket??? I don’t remember them being banned from tWWE2K16 GRANT BODY -P!he building or anything…

Are TEAM BAD chanting for Becky???? Interesting…

What’s more interesting was – Ric Flair tripped up Alicia, enabling Becky to get the Disarmour submission move! Becky don’t know about it! Hmmmm…

Look at Vincent Kennedy! He’s telling Rusev & Bertie to make sure they teef so that Roman Reigns gets fired! Deano! usos! ARE YOU WATCHING THIS?!!!!

HA! HA! HA! HA! Look at Vincent Kennedy! In his chair with his foot cock up! Full on jack ups!!! This is it people! Roman Reigns wins, he’s the World Wrestling Federation Champion! Roman Loses, and it could be a celebration for the IWC!!! And guess what? I STILL WIN you know why? Vincent Kennedy alone has made Raw great, then (almost) everything else that followed was superb!

You know what? Vince at ringside with the World Wrestling Federation Championship on the line might not be cool yo! Bret Hart you see what I’m saying though right?

GRANT BODY-P!!!

Oh man… this could be f**ked up in the highest order… I mean, it’s Roman Reigns Daughter’s birthday… if he gets fired… his wife might get bex!

One other thing – fans – STOP wishing for Reigns to turn heel… IT DOES NOT MAKE SENSE AT THIS POINT! You are acting without the benefit of intellect – STOP IT!!!

Samoan drop off the top rope by Reigns! You think he’s closing 2015 with the title??? On the flipside, ANYTHING can happen in the World Wrestling Federation… I can’t see how a Reigns heel turn is realistic at this point…

Sheamus applies the cloverleaf submission, I thought Vincent Kennedy was gonna pull a fast one!

NO WAY TEEEEEEF!!! Vincent Kennedy pulled the referee out of the ring! Roman Reigns busted open! Aaah man!

Sheamus hit the White Noise… Reigns kicks out though! This isn’t good!

TEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!! Rusev and Bertie attacking Reigns! He’s still fighting! OH SNAP! Reigns hit the superman punch to Vince!!! Sheamus hit the Brogue Kick and Reigns kicked out again!

OH MY DAYS!!! Reigns hit the spear!!!! The leg is hooked! 1……2…..and…….3!!!!!!!

Roman Reigns – NEW WORLD WRESTLING FEDERATION CHAMPION!!!!! BACKSIDE!!!! Now RUN FOR THE HILLS KID! Last longer than 5minutes 15 seconds this time!

Now this has changed EVERYTHING!!!!! If only Deano came out and celebrated with him….

They say the road to WrestleMania begins at the Royal Rumble, F**K THAT – The sh!t just started NOW!

Roman - new WWF CHAMPION!

GRANT BODY-P!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

FOLLOW SMACK TALK CENTRE ON TWITTER

DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.