Welcome to the Jobber Blogger #89! The second proper instalment over on TheSteelChair.com and like always I ramble on endlessly about nothing!
Though perhaps nothing isn’t quite at hand here, as TNA embark on yet another (I’m sure to be awesome sell out) UK Tour, the question at hand is this: does it really matter?
I think the short answer is no. Nothing TNA does matters, Wrestling History is going to go on with them or without them, and unfortunately the WWE is always going to the power that controls the History of the Industry. Lots of rumours floating around that Sting is about to Sign a WWE Legends deal, everything from him just being involved with a WCW DVD to the Launch of the WWE Network and their WCW Content. To him being RAW’s General Manager and all kinds of stuff. Now this seems to be the most “official” word yet of Sting and WWE actually coming to terms, I would even go so far as to say that Hogan’s recent TNA departure and WWE involvement would partially be life line between Sting and the WWE also. I guess what I’m getting at, is if Sting goes to the WWE, he will be looked upon for all of his work outside of the WWE… in WCW. The WWE don’t care how many times he’s been TNA Champion, how many years he’s worked for that promotion, they won’t even blink an eye that he’s in the “Hall of Fame”. It just didn’t happen.
That’s the thing that bugs me the most, see I love TNA, that’s well documented, but if Bobby Roode went to the WWE, sure some people would know of his work, but it would never be mentioned. When Booker T went to WWE via the buyout of WCW – he was credited with his Five Time World Heavyweight Championship reign. All of the WCW guys carried their legacy, hell even ECW carried their legacy, and that was a terrible promotion.
But TNA, who had all the right faces, and all the right ingredients, they just don’t affect the WWE, Ric Flair returns with no mention of TNA (aside from his now infamous WWE 2K14 Panel with Foley) when Hogan returns, there will be no mention, when Kurt Angle inevitably returns, he will have just “Been gone” for several years. No one cares.
They’ve even said if AJ Styles were to wind up in the WWE he would be a mid-carder at best despite he carries a huge weight of Wrestling Greatness through-out the industry, to the point where Kurt Angle left the WWE purely to Wrestle Styles. It’s like everything TNA is doing, should they one day go out of business, it was all for nothing.
If they could gather the ratings and pull in higher numbers, WWE would have to pay attention. And one could think that this is the current trend in Wrestling today. Like any Wrestling fan I’m reading and trying to find out what’s going on with the Royal Rumble / Daniel Bryan / Batista and now of course CM Punk. Clearly the Daniel Bryan thing is a work, and it’s clearly working! Batista is just “one of those guys” from an era that wasn’t even that popular. I think he feels he’s a type of Stone Cold / The Rock, but nope, WWE sucked then and it sucks now. I never got on the Batista train, doesn’t appeal to me. And now the Wrestling Audience is smarter than ever, they know guys like Bryan and Punk work hard for their slot on the show, and then they lose it to some muscle bound Hollywood type who can’t Wrestle half as well purely because his name might carry some “cache”. Least he isn’t as insulting as The Rock’s “triumphant return” for those who grew up watching him to suddenly realise that he actually is terrible as a Wrestler.
Now in the same vein, I don’t look as CM Punk as anything special. I like Punk, but let’s not beat it round the bush, Punk got lucky as he was given the opportunity to “mouth off” and that’s what made his Career. Since then, he’s done very little till now. And only now is important because people don’t know if it’s legit or not, I would say it is a Work, but who knows? Even if it’s not he will go back to the WWE, no chance he’ll turn up in TNA, I’d love it if he did come to TNA, I think his look and style suits their product more so. But what would that mean to the Industry? Guess what, nothing. I bet over half of the WWE’s audience don’t even know TNA exists. And those who do, would probably tune in to see Punk, then tune right back out again. Their viewership would increase, but I don’t think it’s a wise investment. Punk would go back to the WWE, he wouldn’t be loyal to TNA, I don’t even think he likes TNA. His first stint there wasn’t very good, so I don’t think he’d be in a rush to go out. People who question if TNA could “afford” him is ridiculous, TNA are stupid with Money and they paid Hogan more than WWE offered him, and he still left. That says it all really.
TNA always struggle to capitalise on what they have, and granted they are smart enough to listen to their fans, but everything they do just ends up being subpar. I hope they do something great, but I just don’t think they will. If these rumours about Sting are true, then I would say that AJ Styles and Jeff Jarrett have officially left the company, and then if that is true, then TNA are in serious trouble.
Anyway, without this turning into a huge rant about why I like TNA, what TNA does wrong and why I don’t like the WWE, let’s just get down to the business at hand!
TNA: IMPACT WRESTLING – 30/1/14
Yes, for the first time ever TNA Impact airs in the UK before the US. And it came straight from Glasgow Scotland, though they did label it as “LIVE!” it wasn’t. But that doesn’t really matter.
What matters is simple, TNA should just get a home over here and film it in the UK because it looks like a force to be reckoned with when they Tape over here, they pack out of the Arena’s (even on the Camera’s side) and they have crazy crowds. Of course I’m not being entirely serious.
Not to mention they did have some Audio problems through-out the broadcast, but least they didn’t Tape it and then Dub the Commentary on top of it, and I hope they don’t do that for the rest of the Taped shows, because it ruined it for me last year.
Magnus kicked off the show and was met with a sea of “Boo’s!” which I was a little surprised by. Though as he did point out, it is Scotland. I would imagine he would be cheered when they get to the UK Shows.
What made me laugh in a type of “ironic” way, is that Magnus and Dixie Carter represent what the Internet have always said TNA should do. As he put it “thinning of the heard / putting the old stars out to pasture to make room for the new”. And yet this was met in a negative light. Though for years everyone’s said that TNA’s downfall is all of these old guys that they bring in for hopes of a Ratings boost, and now look. Hogan and Bischoff have gone, Sting has gone, Nash has gone, Steiner’s gone, Bookers gone, Foley’s gone. Who is left? Angle is going to leave, and I can’t wait to slam the door behind him. You could make a case for Bully and Hardy, but Bully has had his best years in Wrestling in TNA, he isn’t the same guy he used to be, and thank him for being Loyal to them. Same can be said for Hardy, he’s had the best two years of his Career in TNA and he’s in a much better place in his life than he’s ever been before.
So the people get what they want, but they aren’t happy.
Such is life – C’est la vie, Monge tu and Duck a l’orange
EC3 stepped up to get in the face of Magnus when he claimed to “single handily” rid TNA of Styles, Hardy and Sting. The first of a few confrontations between the two. Angle and Joe however crashed the segment and despite Dixie Carter not giving her blessing – it all boiled down to a match – Magnus and EC3 (who Magnus handpicked I might add) vs. Kurt Angle and Samoa Joe – Contracts vs. Number One Contender Shot
I think Spud said it all really
Gail Kim and Lei’D Tapa vs. Velvet Sky and Madison Rayne
Even writing that I wrote Gail Kim and Madison Rayne, subconsciously I combined those two together more so than Velvet and Rayne. Not having the Beautiful People in TNA is a sacrilege. Of course having them in TNA without Angelina Love is a far worse crime. Also nice job on the Video Edits of Velvet and Rayne together (without Angelina).
Madison Rayne suits spoiled little jealous Blonde Girl so much more than she does her current role, just as The Beautiful People suit Heels far better than a Face faction.
Though how could anyone be angry at someone who had a hand in accidently hitting Earl Hebner in the face. Velvet hit her (bad) Bulldog on Gail for a two-count but when Gail kicked out she raised her hand and hit Earl in the fact,… that’s a lol moment.
Madison hit a spear on Gail out of no-where, Velvet finished Gail off with “In Yo Face!” and took the win. Before I go on about how short this match was, I just had a brilliant thought. I Hope and Pray that X-Pac – Sean Waltman wrestlers somewhere in the indies, and does his X-Factor, for someone in the crowd to tell him off for stealing Velvet’s move! If there is a God in Heaven! Please! Let this happen and be on Video! Some child telling him off for stealing a Woman’s move would just be hilarious and the icing on the cake for his so-so career.So yeah, once again the team of the best Female Wrestle in the world, and her huge gigantic powerful scary body guard, were defeated by Wrestlers who can’t Wrestle and let’s face it, Velvet can’t even run the ropes right after all these years. I love them all dearly, but at times it’s just a little too “fake” to be believed.
Chris Sabin heads to the ring afterward to do the great “Bad Guy” move… but also had me laughing like crazy of “Say you’re sorry now, and we’ll go in the back and you can give me a massage”. Just like the short lived run of Joey Ryan who had the best line when he chose to introduce Matt Morgan rather than Hemme when he told her to go make him a sandwich. Needless to say, Velvet told him that they are over and left.
James Storm and Gunner vs. Bad Influence – Gunners World Title Briefcase on the line
James Storm had the worst segment on the show, though it was made slightly better by some guy in the front row making Animal Noises. He could have been cheering but I haven’t heard anything like that before. Storm called out Gunner to “put an end to this”.
And then we were subjected to this horrible segment where they made Bro-Love with doing things for their families and blah blah blah, and when Gunner was in the Marines, and blah blah blah, and then Scotland fans started chanting USA. And what the hell was happening?
I’m sick and tired of the whole “I did this for my Family!” speech, can’t you just do it for yourself. Am I supposed to think that you’re struggling to pay your pills and put food on your plate. I manage it by working 12 hours a week in a Cinema, I’m fairly sure you’re getting paid a hell of a lot more than me. If you can’t make that work then perhaps you should consider changing your life style. And not buy the most expensive Cheese and 1837 Bottle of Wine for your evening of “fine dining”.
What happened to them just chasing a Career in Wrestling, you want to be a Wrestler, you want to be the best guy, awesome, go out there, win the World Championship and do it for your own damn Career and legacy. I don’t want to watch sad back stories in my Wrestling show about how you can’t buy your children 3 games consoles and then afford to send them to the best School in the country and buy them a Porsche for their Graduation present.
I feel this is going to be a good Ranting episode, just wait till I get to Kurt Angle!
Thankfully Bad Influence got involved and so I bring back the long forgotten but most fabled element of my Blog:
I’m now hoping Storm renames his character – The Monkey Fart James Storm and together with Gunner their Tag-Team name can be – Beard with no Brains. I’m game.So this of course ended in a match – with Gunner once again putting his Briefcase on the line. Funny because when he first decided to do it, Dixie had a issue with it, but then agreed as a way to make him pay for interrupting her. Since then Gunner has been defending it left right and centre.
The idea is that Bad Influence told Gunner he can’t trust James Storm, and much to everyone’s dismay, Storm didn’t do anything untrustworthy.
Gunner was impressive as always and worked with Storm to win – with a top rope Head-butt none the less. Then Storm and Gunner celebrated their victory and left for some more Bro-Loving…. beard style.
Earlier on in the night Kurt and Joe singled out Bobby Roode and threatened him so he wouldn’t get involved in their match with their contracts on the line. This led to Roode giving Dixie Carter an ultimatum. Roode only helped get rid of AJ and Sting for a Title Shot, and Roode demanded it be at Lockdown, and until that is agreed, he won’t be doing anything to help Dixie or Magnus further. Makes sense.
Spud was sent on an errand to find out who this “Investor” is, and do that he called out the Wolves.
Again, Spud stole the show, he got in their faces screaming and claimed to have seen a good bit of American television and tried to interrogate them with his torch. Till he just slapped Davey Richards I believe, and then was dropped by the Wolves and a double team move.
The Wolves had pretty good music, and I do look forward to them being used in the ring (which is coming up soon I believe).
Abyss and Eric Young vs. The Bromans (w/DJ Zema Ion) – World Tag-Team Championships
I am confused now.
I think there is a piece of this story missing. Park was still Park, even in Monsters Ball, and after Monsters Ball, then last week he showed up as Abyss… there was no “connection”. So is he now just Abyss and Park is no more. Or are we going to find out they are two different people. And why the hell did they stop trying to make sense of it all with Bully Ray.
I also don’t get why they got a Tag-Team Title Match. And I still think EY should go for a Mad Scientist look.
The match looked as if EY was in control of Abyss, till then Abyss just had enough and cleaned house including taking out some British Referee who had his 15 Mins of fame I’m sure.
Abyss then Choke Slammed EY and went crazy. Leading to next week’s Abyss vs. EY – Monsters Ball match, which is supposed to be the final part in EY’s plan.
I don’t really know what I want to happen anymore, probably just get Abyss back, though one would question why someone would chose to do that. And they’ve opened up a lot of good “horror movie” type stories, but then just walked away from them. So as always, they probably won’t capitalise on their potential.
Christy Hemme and Samuel Shaw had another segment, where they were at his house. I’m sure that wasn’t his house, because it looked terrible. Maybe they do get paid really badly and so I should apologise to Gunner. Either way, speaking of things being stupid, Shaw had his hand in the Candle which he didn’t realise. That’s a character trait. And it’s going to come in handy when he fights… flame man?
Still, Shaw then went to his room with a piece of Christy’s hair and put it on this Mannequin Doll he has of her in his Shrine Room.
Do you think somebody ought to tell him she posed for Playboy?
I like segments like these, but it’s where Wrestling crosses over into Television and it doesn’t work. It’s supposed to be as if the Camera men are following these two on their time off. That’s fine, but then why would a Camera man be in his secret closet. It makes no sense. Clearly Christy is capable of watching the show and therefore would have seen all of this anyway. It’s not TV, it’s Reality Entertainment. It’s a strange mix, that just makes you not buy into things, and then it makes even less sense. Like having a Motorcycle Gang without Bikes whose slogan is about Walking… WHAT!!?
Bully Ray makes his way to the ring pushing out a Coffin, then went on to talk about all the things he “used to be” and that Anderson took them all from him. The coffin symbolises the burial of The Aces and Eights and everything Bully stood for, so it is fitting that this culminates in a Casket Match. Or “Coffin Match”. Not to be mistaken for the “Coughing Match” which is entirely different.
Anderson and Bully got into another fight, but I am glad to see this type of Match. Sure it’s a silly gimmick match, and part of me wonders if Bully could actually fit in the Coffin he had with him, smart game plan really.
I do wonder where they both go from here, but I look forward to watch it unfold.
Magnus and Ethan Carter the third vs. Kurt Angle and Samoa Joe – Contracts vs. Number One Contendership
Basically, if Angle or Joe lost, they leave TNA. And if Angle or Joe pin either Magnus or EC3 they get a World Championship shot.
The investor added the stipulation that if anyone interferes in the match they will be fired. I still need to buy those shares, buying shares sounds great. I could buy a share in TNA and start demanding things.
Earlier in the night Magnus spoke to EC3 about how he doesn’t like him, and that he has to Team with EC3 and should he lose he must defend his title. Which is sort of silly, as Magnus agreed to the stipulation and also chose EC3 to be his partner.
That aside, I actually love that Magnus is a fighting champion. Sure he has a lot of help, but he’s not running from fights, he’s demanding them. He also isn’t afraid to show that he’s happy to be the face of TNA, but that doesn’t mean he likes who he’s aligned with, but he will do whatever he has to, to further his Career… I respect that. Screw this for my family crap.
The good news is that Samoa Joe made Magnus tap-out. That’s good because I always wish Joe was more old school. He was intimidating to watch when he first showed up in TNA, it was shortly after I finished up with my “Wrestling Training” attempt and I remember thinking “screw getting in the ring with this guy”. Joe was a force, and I felt sorry for his opponents. It wasn’t till I saw him in a Q&A I attended a year later where he seemed like a great guy outside of the ring. The last few years or so, Joe has been a shell of his former self, so I’m glad to see him be the one to get the Title Shot, though I do think Joe will be fired shortly after ala AJ Styles. But if Joe came back full force, undefeated, quick matches, impactful moves and unstoppable, I’m on board for that journey.
The highlight would be Dixie leading Spud to the ring holding hands and Spud keeled over from his attack earlier on in the night. What is more interesting is that Joe stated he and Angle will be staying in TNA for a long, long, time.
Now Angle has always said he would go back to the WWE, but of late he’s been saying “I can’t lie to myself any longer, I want to go back”. Well good riddance. I like Kurt, but if he doesn’t want to stay with TNA, to help build TNA, then leave. His pay check can go toward getting new talent or better invested in something to build the product.
What is more ridiculous is that Kurt now wants to be in the TNA Hall of Fame, asking Dixie to roll out her Chequebook and induct him, and invite the new investor.
So let’s get this straight, Kurt Angle, who has had a great run in TNA, gets arrested for DUI… again, and leaves for rehab. Upon returning he has beef with Bobby Roode who says Angle isn’t Hall of Fame material…. then Angle rejects the Hall of Fame.. proving Roode to be right… but still has a problem with Roode… despite he was right, and Angle showed it.
Angle then says he needs to cement his position within TNA once more, and win the World Championship once more, which to me, says “hey, I screwed up, I made a mistake, I went to rehab, but I’m back to be the best!”. So Angle injures himself and loses countless matches, then barely wins a Cage match against Roode by “falling” and then Joe wins the Tag-Match and gets a World Title Match.. and it’s then that Angle feels he has proven himself to be Hall of Fame Worthy?
Are you kidding me.
That was Kurt’s Road to Glory and Journey to the Immortals. He’s happy with a losing streak, a close victory and a win by his Partner. That’s enough for him to want to be in the Hall of Fame? I still don’t get how he beating Roode by falling faster than Roode crawled is “winning the war” after Roode beat him three times in singles competition alone. I would revoke the Offer and tell him to get lost. Speaking of Revoking the offer, Dixie had a fit and shouted for this Investor to turn up. And he did, being MVP. Surprising everyone. Well least he tried, but everyone was expecting it. And much to my dismay, I actually rather enjoyed it, and I look forward to seeing what happens next week.
Least TNA have learnt from that horrible “August 1 Warning” flop in their face.
So a good show, even if I had a good rant!
I’m sure Storm will turn on Gunner, and I hope to see MVP and the Wolves next week and look forward to more twists and turns in the road.