Tag Archives: The Undertaker

Monday Night Raw #1147, May 18, 2015!!!

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The Infamous Informer

I wanna give a shout out to STC member Kieran Murray and his Wolfpack crew, see they’ve started some sh!t on the Smack Talk Centre on some faction warfare business… you got the Wolfpack, the Authority, The Alliance, and now the Ministry… I play the track above because everybody wants to know… who’s side is the Infamous Informer on? Ol’Dirty Bastard’s first line in the track is your answer. Meaning… I’m staying out of this foolishness! I am a One Man Army… you know why? Because I gotta entertain my readers every week – those who don’t take wrestling seriously, I gotta entertain my listeners on KicFM, whether it be the STC From The UK show, or the RePPiN4U Hip Hop Show! I have peoples who look up to me…. (WHAT?) I said they look up to me…. (Shout out to Stone Cold Steve Austin…) if you don’t know where I got that line from in WWF, do your googles, do your research!!!

If you want to know more about the madness in Smack Talk Centre,the wildest FB wrestling forum, accept NO imitations, simply hit up your Facebook and go to http://www.facebook.com/groups/smacktalkcentre. REQUEST TO JOIN – DON’T BE A WEIRDO!

OK enough of all that sh!t! R-Truth, Ascension, Sheamus, New Day, Wyatt, Cena, Naomi & Tamina, Neville, and Rollins get dem Payback!!! Send for the Chamber!!!! RAW #1147! Hold-Dat – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZSo Triple…. now that you have passed down your pedigree super move to Rollins, are you gonna pass down your 20 minute ‘I Am The Game-errrrrrr’ promos too?

Hi Steph!!! I sure have missed you girl…. Come here let me give you a hug… mind mi cocky!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Well trust them to rub it in how Danny Bryan doesn’t have a TV and all that, chopping wood making a fireplace…

Talk about the Elimination Chamber and Sheamus feels since he put Bryan out the game, he should be the new Intercontinental Champion… Ha… Ryback thinks differently though!!! Has Sheamus and Ryback ever clashed??? I don’t think so – that would be good to see!

Wait a minute – Triple is making it happen! YES TRIPLE! Ryback Vs Sheamus!!! Someone is losing teeth tonight – LET’S GO!

Oh did you just hear that – Ryback & Sheamus will be in the Chamber match! So there’s no qualifying matches and all that sh!t? Well that’s cool with me! Who’s the other 4 muthaf***az? STAY TUNED!

Funny how Ryback hates bullies when about a year or so ago he was on that same sh!t…..

OH SNAP! Sheamus acting like he got something in his eye… ref tryna restrain Ryback… Sheamus playing possum – Brogue Kick in the mouth – BLAOW!!!

OH SNAP!!!!! I know Ambrose did not just KILL that segment! Ambrose said to Ka- er I mean Glenn what I’ve said for weeks ever since he donned those pathetic Sunday schooltrousers… “What would Paul Bearer think? And your BROTHER???? Supposed to be the Devil’s favourite demon….” and took away his champagne!!!! That’s what I’ve said for how long – he committed the most abominable of all sins – he betrayed himself!!! He became one of us! Don’t know where I’m referring to? Do your googles!!!!

I’m sorry Renée Young couldn’t interview me on some ‘Unfiltered’ sh!t…. I’d risk having a good ol’ scrap with Dean Ambrose!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Oh dear Bo Dallas wants to cause beef with Neville…oh I remember these two clashed in NXT and Neville became the champion… look at Dallas targeting Neville’s injured knee… now look, Barrett’s coming out to compete… I can’t see my dude Neville winning this yo…

Big up Mike Cole for addressing him has ‘Bad News Barrett’…. he ain’t no ‘KING’ to me… F**k that – I address him as Wade B!tch @$$!!!!

Oh sh!t he got the Bullhammer super move on Neville… GOD DAMNIT!!!! BURN DOWN THE PALACE!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Big up Bo Dallas, though… he find himself in a storyline that we can be invested in…

OH SH!T!!! RUSEV BEX! Did he say ‘I Quit’??? Is he gonna run down Lana??? I’m sure there are an army of wrestling fans ready to jump to Lana’s defence! All to get in her little panties!!!

WE WANT LANA!!!! WE WANT LANA!!! – SHUT-TUP!!! Haha I like this!

Wait a minute Rusev – you can’t have a rematch??? You can’t restart the sh!t? The feud is over – this cannot continue – wait a minute Lana is here!!!! I see you wrestling fans cracking your fists like Bruce Lee!!!

…and let’s just throw a pic of Lana here… for no reason!

LANA SMILE

OH SNAP!!! RUSEV SHUT HER DOWN!!!! This could be the greatest day of wrestling fans lives!!!! Even John Cena might get cheered here!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Lana claims he said ‘I Quit’ in Bulgarian!!! Wrestling fans doing their googles! STC lads investing in condoms!!! F**k that, I wanna know how Lana says ‘Oh Yeah, Don’t Stop!’ in Bulgarian!!!

MY GOD THAT IS ENOUGH!!!!

So this is what Ambrose gets for bringing up Paul Bearer and The Undertaker… he fights Bray Wyatt… Ambrose ain’t sweating no lantern wielding fool!

What the f**k is that written on the back of Wyatt’s shirt? Follow us – pon di twitter @stc_wwe! or @MZATheInfamous!

Two guys of unorthodox fighting styles…. fans are loving this! Instead of ‘This Is Awesome’… why can’t we have a ‘This Is The Sh!t’ chant going!!!!

Why the f**k did J&J security come and teef? I thought Seth Rollins was like – nah Ambrose, you get to the back of the line… you can’t fight again? What sort of sh!t is that????

Now… Xavier Woods teefed in the match at Payback, so they banned his blodclart from ringside… doesn’t matter… Kofi and Big E got this! They will brukk up Cesaro & Kidd same way!

..and at the Chamber… they gotta defend the titles against FIVE teams??? OH SNAP!!!! Well there’s my theory out the window! The Chamber is gonna be OFF THE HOOK! I’ll be clapping… NEW.. DAY ROCKS!!!

I just love when Big E hits a big move… then he starts the clap!

Hold up, Barrett, Truth, & Rusev entering the Chamber too? WHAAAAT!

As much as I like the tag teams taking part in the Chamber – Primetime Players, LUCHA! LUCHA! LUCHA! New Day, Cesaro & Kidd, Ascension, you mean to tell me Los Jobberdores made the cut instead of Rowan & Harper???? I can hear some muthaf***a screaming out – ‘Who booked this crap’???!

What if I told you it was Teddy Long? Sh!t he should announce it! F**k that – I should tweet him!

Teddy Long  1 foot skank

Look at him! The 1 foot skank!!! Teddy Long is overjoyed!!!!

I just fast forwarded the BLA BLA BLA from Cena…. who’s gonna represent to take the title this week?

KEVIN OWENS???? The NXT Champion??? BACKSIDE!!!!! He could make history! Defeat Cena and wield the NXT & US Title at the NXT joint – UNSTOPPABLE this week!

NXT Unstoppable

Stop the chat – fight!!!! You think Scorpion & Sub-Zero would chat all this sh!t before they kill each other?

What???? Owens refuses the challenge? but he kick down Cena, dropped the powerbomb on his @$$, and stamp pon the US title???? DISRESPECT!!! Owens said – he will fight Cena on his terms??? WHOA! It’s a future war about to build! Cena looking like – WTF just happened? Just when I thought Cena’s war with Rusev was personal….

Did you see the Ziggler Vs Sheamus match on Payback? Then you know what happened with that headbutt.. come on Stardust… BUST HIM OPEN!!!

What? He just lost to Ziggler??? SH!T!!! And he’s in the chamber too?

OH SNAP!!!! Ziggler really does steal girlfriends!!!! Lana just came through and planted one or two on his lips! He’s STILL GAY! If that was me, I would have got all in her tongue, feel on her t!tt!£$, slap her @$$ and wrap her leg around my pelvis, let that skirt ride up! We are talking Lana people, one of the hottest gyal on WWE, and that’s what Ziggler does? BATTYMAN!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Meanwhile Wack Ryder & Fandumbgay are about to get BUSS ARSE by the Wyatt man dem…. I’m not even gonna watch this sh!t! TOILET BREAK!

Stephanie has started to f**k with the Bella Twins again???? Do we wanna see Stephanie Vs Brie/Nikki Part II at Summerslam??? Well I would like to see Stephanie…GRANT THAT'S WHAT I DO

Naomi YOUR TIME COME!!!! You come for your belt! She can’t be booed! because she got SKILLS!!!!

Nikki – GET READY TO LOSE THAT TITLE! You haven’t got Brie to back you again!

GODDAMNIT – disqualification???? And that Milk of Magnesia Paige is screaming – ‘My House’!!!! GOD DAMNIT – I hate that B!ATCH!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

HOLY F**K!!!! Kevin Owens gonna fight John Cena at the Elimination Chamber joint??? And this is FREE to new May subscribers??? Do I have to pull your ears to the laptop and sign up??? Suddenly Payback was just an episode of RAW!

Time to celebrate the Architect of a Dream – Seth Rollins! He’s the future! He used the Pedigree! J&J security and Glenn help him! If only Kane pulled up in a truck full of gasoline and set that muthaf***a on fire!

Hey don’t get it twisted – I like Seth Rollins! It’s that Glenn I can’t stand!

I’ve gotta question – Has Stephanie prepared a song for Seth? You know, Wind Beneath My Ring 2015????

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Chamber music, f**k!n the party up!!! Dean Ambrose I hope you know what you’re doing????

Ambrose bringing the Ruckus to Rollins!!!! He was ready to f**k him up with the cinder blocks until Triple & Steph granted the Championship match at the Chamber!

But even a one man army like Ambrose can outlast the Authority for so long… Rollins hits the pedigree – BLAOW! (Remind me to put that in Seth’s move-set in WWE2K15!)

The question remains – what becomes of Orton and Reigns? Where do they fit into the equation?

GRANT BODY – P!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

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DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.

 

Monday Night Raw #1143, April 20, 2015!!!

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The Infamous Informer

On a real though… get your high on. For me it’s beats, rhymes & life. Shout out to Lost Boyz, they got the tune called – Music Makes Me High. Whatever gets you high, even if it’s this wrestling sh!t, GET HIGH. Happy 4:20 Ninjas & Ninjarettes!

I’m the Infamous Informer, a.k.a. The Daywalker… and I have NO sympathy, NO compassion, NO remorse…welcome to RAW before Extreme Rules! We got STC’s Taran Wright representing! HOL’DAT BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZChocolate Hob Nobs, Supermalt, Tamara Loveset & Ani James on Babestation in case RAW gets wack in places… I’m ready to go!

Oh snap! What’s the cage doing there??? If you see a cage on Raw, it usually means somebody gonna get buss arse in that b!atch!

Word on the street is Seth Rollins super move – the Curb Stomp is banned… how ironic is that when he said last week that the RKO is banned at Extreme Rules!!!!

OH NO! Randall cuting his promo, saying he’s gonna break Seth’s jaw?!!!! He just confirmed he’s gonna kick Seth in his head!!!! He said banning the RKO don’t mean sh!t!!!!! I KNEW IT!!!

Seth promises that Randall won’t leave the champion! I believe him! And Randall promises that everyone gonna get RKO’d!!!! Ahhhh the memories of Austin interrupting everyone’s matches and dropping stunners on muthaf***az!

Now it makes me wonder, was Randall’s language and ‘Austin-esque’ demeanor subtle hints of the attitude era that you can get on WWE Network for £9.99???

Now if I was Ambrose & Harper… I’d be careful… Voices gonna be chatting to Randall tonight! That’s all I’m saying!

Harper – there’s no point throwing Ambrose off the stage…. remember back in the days??? when there were stacks of tables awaiting the victim? Mick Foley and Chainsaw Charlie knows! Eric Bischoff knows!!! Kurt Angle knows!!!!

Ok they got away… but New Day and Lucha Dragons may not be so lucky… imagine fighting on edge knowing that Randall could strike at any moment?

By the way IWC b!tches – don’t complain that Randall is wrecking great wrestling matches – you loved that sh!t in 98 when Austin did it! So SHUDDUP!

Well, you guys say ‘New Day Sucks’… so they gonna start acting like it – Xavier Woods held the Lucha man’s legs and prevent them from going to Extreme Rules to fight Cesaro and Tyson Kidd! I thought you were about positivity guys? I warned you didn’t I??? Randall Orton – RKO to Kofi Kingston – BLAOW!!!! Even Big E was like ‘Randall don’t hit me no more!!!’

WTF is this??? Curtis Axel tryna dance on some Fandango sh!t???? Yo Randall – get back out here!!!! In the meantime, Tamara – entertain the Daywalker!!!!

B7rLwHcIYAED6cM.jpg largeBlade dutty bwoy

All you jabronies talking about who would win between Batman & Superman… Blade would f**k em both up!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Yeaaaah thank goodness!!! My Dude Triple TEEF!!!! He got some sh!t to say about Tough Enough… ok ssshhhhh…

Yes Triple I’m sure a lot of those fat muthaf***az have dreamed of being a WWE superstar… yes so has the Infamous Informer, I got my music and everything… matter fact let me show you how it would go…

 

So what I lost to Ryback…. Ryback is a bad man!

Anyway back to this sh!t… Glenn is handing in his notice to Triple in two weeks? Seth is running his mouth, Glenn now speaking like Kane???? OHHHH SH!!!!!T!!!! Triple, just give Kane back his mask!!! Word up I can’t stand this suit wearing Glenn… well I don’t really but it’s knowing what he was like – the man had Undertaker shook for crying out loud!

Anyway Paige – it’s NEVER your house!!! Here comes my star! The Wife that got away! Naomi! She gonna take on

The MAN in the PURPLE SUIT!

Brie Bella! and Brie… you gotta sexy body I’ll give you that…. you still gon lose!

Hold up – Triple is like – ‘you are corporate, you are no longer hell fire & brimstone…’ they teasing that sh!t people!!!

That’s one thing me & Seth agree on – DESTROY Ziggler! Ok that’s enough – Naomi -the STAR! Come out girl!

They need to change her music too… It won’t be long before I find something suitable…

I’m so glad Paige is out the game! It’s NOT YOUR HOUSE! Keep your @$$ in the hospital!!!!

GET HER NAOMI! DESTROY BRIE COMPLETELY!!!!

I GOT IT!!!! Naomi’s new theme tune according to Grant, because like Angela Davis, Naomi don’t take no sh!t!!!!!!

You listen to that tune – No Nonsense… Straight to the point, Stand for what you believe!!!!! That’s why I love Naomi, go out and get what’s yours girl! The World Wrestling Federation Divas Champion!!!!

Next victim – Heath Slater! What was that about being new US Champ Heath??? RKO – BLAOW!!!!! Erick Rowan had sense and walked away because he knew!!!!!

STC BDSIR EXTREME RULES 2015

Yep – my dude Roman Reigns can’t cut a promo to you guys, so he’s like f**k that – I feel like fighting! He wants to f**k up the Big S…. Bo Dallas???? Dude – turn back! BO-Lieve you can Run For The Hills!!!! This guy is hard ears – he gonna get punched in his mouth for saying something slick….

Yep – what did I tell ya! Well Roman & Big Show gonna fight til only one man can stand up…I notice the booing has stopped for Reigns now! Wait til he goes for the title again…

Yes – I can ryde to Sheamus new music… the IWC hating on the stipulation – ‘Kiss My Arse’ matc – Wack Ryder is still employed by WWE???? I smell just another victim! (Shout out to Tazz, he left the TNA joint because they won’t help him decorate the kitchen table!)

I can’t believe he beat up Wack Ryder then asked him if he’s alright???!! HA! HA! HA! HA! HA! YES SHEAMUS! He just asked the Albany crowd ‘Are they not entertained’???? Hell yeah I was entertained!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Any way where was I? Oh yes… the IWC b!tches, I see you hating on the stipulation – so w’happen – you didn’t like it when Jerry The King Lawler had to kiss Bret Hart’s feet? You didn’t like The Rock Vs Billy Gunn match? (I can’t remember who won that one…) And of course – the Vincent Kennedy Kiss My @$$ club? Are you telling me you didn’t like that sh!t??? F**KOUTTAHERE!!! Mad ‘Sports Entertainment’ in YOUR YOUTH – but you want wrestling… do you know how dumb you sound? That’s what The Infamous Informer does – Catches you f***az out every time!

Muthaf***az still hating on Cena…there’s no helping them… I mean really. I’m glad I’m not one of them people… their life must be mad miserable!

Hold up – Cena & Rusev gotta touch all four corners to win the Russian Chain match? F**k the four corners – destroy each other with the chain! I’m sure Triple & Kane didn’t do that at Judgment Day 2001!

Shout out to Mike Knoxxx – it’s true – I’m not listening to Cena right now – He’s on some – BLA-BLA-BLA! BLA-BLA-BLA-BLA-BLA!!!!!!!

OH SNAP!!!! Wait a minute – Glenn gonna fight Cena for the US title??? Uh-OH!!!! It should be advantage Cena – he hasn’t got his mask on!

Maybe Undertaker actually talked sense into his humanised brother???

Oh snap! Cena tried his 5 moves and Glenn didn’t move!!!! Er…. Cena, I might have to pray for ya…

But Glenn’s Chokeslam didn’t hold Cena down!!!! Glenn sends for the tombstone! Cena counter technique – FU – BLAOW!!! No point getting bex – we knew Cena was gonna win! Waste of time and energy doing that sh!t!

Anyone see The Marine 4???? nah me neither….

Sorry Rusev…. that chain looks like any other chain I’ve seen in the WWE… what’s so ‘Russian’ about it????

Hip Hop fans – that advert that keeps coming on in between RAW – The Windows Spectre 360 – Doesn’t that beat sound a bit J Dilla-ish??? Get at me – PON DI TWITTA – @MZATheInfamous!

Look here now… The Miz & Mizdow fighting over the brand…. what sort of sh!t is that??? Ani James, show me your ‘brand’…

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I’d rather Ani back that @$$ up so I can go Grantington Steele up her cratches!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

YES!!!!! So what if Summer Rae turned evil against MizDow, The Miz takes the mic…. “Because I’m The Miz… and I’m – ” RKO – BLAOW!!! BEAUTIFUL!!!! It was like Austin dropping the stunner to Jeff Jarrett!

I don’t know why Seth keeps f**k!n around with Glenn… J&J security talking sh!t on the twitta… You see how social media can get you inna trouble??? Someone remind Seth that they haven’t banned the chokeslam and the tombstone! Or the car battery and the box of matches for that matter?

Right we gonna find out the truth! Ziggler out to compete against Rollins… has Rollins super move being banned??? Because if the Infamous Informer sees that sh!t executed with precision… I will be building a special chair this week!

Looks like it’s true! I think Rollins found a new super move! That took out Ziggler one ti….. uh-oh… Triple TEEF??? Glenn? The cage is coming down! I knew it! Somebody gonna get f**ked up in that b!tch! Rollins thought he was clever by ‘shielding’ himself no pun intended! The Viper slid in! Rollins tried to escape – RKO – BLAOW!!! Extreme Rules… BOTH super moves banned… Glenn as the ‘gatekeeper’… I mean doesn’t that sound ‘Big red Monster-ish’??? Calling it from now – Rollins retains the title…. KANE next in line at the Payback joint. He gonna find that mask… And THENNNNNNN!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

CLICK HERE TO OUR SMACK TALK CENTRE YOUTUBE CHANNEL

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DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.

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Monday Night Raw #1140, March 30, 2015!!!

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The Infamous Informer

Last night I cried Tears Of Joy, What did I do to deserve this?

I’m the Infamous Informer, and I have NO sympathy, NO compassion, NO remorse…welcome to the RAW After Big BIG WrestleMania… can you believe that after the best WrestleMania since X-Seven, we still had grumpy muthaf***az pointing out flaws… you know what, hand in your muthaf***!n WWE card, OK? You not down with the team, and you are only proving to me that it was all about the muthaf***!n attitude era. Sit over there, and watch your Peter Handre bullsh!t on ITV2… you are nothing but a B!TCH!!!

RAW AFTER MANIA: HOL’DAT BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZLet’s start the WrestleMania 32 cycle right!

OOOOHHHHH SH!!!!!T!!!! This man can’t be happy… Brock Lesnar with no title round his waist…. Yo Seth, RUN FOR THE HILLS!

Paul Heyman doesn’t look happy either….

And the crowd chanting SUPLEX CITY!!!! Come on WWE get those merchandising set up! SUPLEX CITY B!TCH!! Do you know how much revenue WWE would make off that alone?

No Heyman! You can’t do that! You would lose a court case on that WWE title sh!t!!! Seth was within his rights to cash his cheque! It was within the one year clause!

Hi Steph! How’s your arm baby girl??? Why is the crowd chanting Ronda Rousey??? HAHAHA! Oh good counter by Stephanie using tricknology to the crowd!

OOOOOH SH!!!!!T! Brock Lesnar is fighting on RAW!!!! Seth, I’m gonna pray for ya….

Dolph Ziggler Vs Danny Bryan for the wrestling fans favourite championship! The same championship STC’s Shadfather calls ‘cursed’!!!!

Great contest! Danny gets the win, HOL’ON! Sheamus is back!! Look at his headtop! Ginger mohawk, beard twiss up, kicking down Dolph & Danny!!!! Why y’all booing? That’s what you wanted right? For Sheamus to turn evil because he went stale???! Gotta rate the crowd though: “YOU LOOK STUPID!!!” I gotta agree! He looks stupid….in a badass way!!!

Hold up – the Lucha Dragons from NXT reppin on RAW???? HELL YEAH THAT IS DAN!!!!!

They are twisting up Cesaro and Kidd! They can’t manage them! They had to retreat one time! Now the crowd chanting ‘New Day Sucks’! OH NO!!!! This is bad! Well not that bad – New Day are being chanted! But there is a solution! #BlackWrestlersMatter

Big up New Day & the Lucha Dragons! Took out the Ascension! They might as well change their name to the Descension because these guys are going down and that’s not cool!

Now they showing vignettes for the kid call Adrian Neville? Ha! new season, new road to WrestleMania 32, and muthaf***az could be future endeavoured!

OH SH!T – Brock just heard Seth Rollins is in the hiz-house…. oh lawd have mercy, I’ma open up my rap bible, and the light will come over the children….

Big up Seth Rollins though, he’s here to compete… a fighting champion!!!! You can’t knock that! Can he send Brock for the Tandem Engine???

Hold on… Rollins is jet lagged? His feet hurt? Oh boy he can see Lesnar is BEX! Seth took my advice! He ran for the hills! J&J security got clotheslined out of their suits! Lesnar pushed over the announce table! JAY-BEE & Booker-T mash-up! Grabs Mike Cole! F5 into the canvas – BLAOW! Grabs the cameraman, Stephanie’s attempt to stop him failed! F5 to the cameraman – BLAOW!!!

OH MY GOD THAT’S ENOUGH!!! THAT MAN HAS A FAMILY DAMNIT!!!

Lesnar suspended indefinitely…. already? He just signed a new contract didn’t he??? OH DEAR!!!

Now we got no commentators! What are we gonna do now? Icy Fresh! Shadfather! Steadx! Get in there and take over!

Stephanie gonna fine him! NO! How is he gonna decorate the kitchen table? Sable can’t be too happy about this??? She gonna starve now!

Damn Bryon Saxton has to run tingz now, and Mizdow is out here on his own fighting Stardust…  You know The Miz gonna f**k this up right? With that I’m gonna find the big man room…

…or maybe not! He used the Miz’s supermove??? Bad mistake…. look who’s here, the @$$hole himself – the Miz…crowd chanting @$$hole! This will be a great compelling feud!

Is Curtis Axel still on this bullsh!t? Yo WrestleMania dun!!! Move on!!!

OH SH!!!!!!!T!!!! The man that gravity forgot! The man they call Neville!!!!! (so they dropped the ‘Adrian’ already…) wrestling fans shut the f**k up – he’s still the same NEVILLE!

Guess what… Cena has another new T-Shirt again!!!! God Damnit!!!! I wonder if the true Cena fans have every single shirt ever released? Cena got more T-shirts than Wu-Tang solo albums!!!

I guess the US Spinner title isn’t making a comeback….shame really…

Well it’s an open challenge! Who wants to test John Cena? Rusev? NOPE – Dean Ambrose!!!! I suppose he’s ready to do this considering he mashed up through those ladders at WrestleMania!

God bless Jerry Lawler… Bryon needed help, he can’t do this sh!t alone!

SPOILER ALERT – Cena wins! Still an awesome match, and a show of respect… fans don’t like that… the fans don’t like anything!!!

Now Seth Rollins has mouth now that Brock has gone to…. pay those bills so to speak…. but he must have forgotten about Randall… who actually brukk up his clart at WrestleMania! Clearly Seth ain’t tryna defend his title… fighting champion my crusty foot bottom! Glenn & Big Show got Rollins back… who Randall gonna send foGrant Body Pr? I can think of Roman… but the fans don’t like him (the fickle idiots…) or what about… oh f**k that – the divas are on!

Well f**k you stupid stream… even you don’t know #AWomansWorth… the stupid sh!t had to freeze up and I missed the match…. had to restart this sh!t – nah they need to put Raw on the muthaf***k!n Network!

Considering this is the RAW after Mania it hasn’t been as good as previous Raw after Mania episodes… at the same time I like that because it’s a slap in the face of the IWC who have a kick out of trashing the biggest show and then looking forward to the Raw after… on that note – f**k you Heelbook… you sons of b!tches!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Word is Randall got Ryback in his team… the other gotta be Roman Reigns surely!

Note to fans – just because you hate Roman Reigns – don’t get in his face on some bullsh!t – if he pushes you one side – IT’S YOUR FAULT OK! Don’t be a d!ckhead!

Oh dear trouble at the STC – I had to sort out some admin business… so I missed the main event. But hold on!!! Sting is on the WWE Network!!!! OH SH!T…. if what I think happens… I’m gonna mark the f**k out!!!

Sting – I know you heard that chant!!!! Stop trippin!

What the hell is Mr Bo-Lieve doing here???? Dude you are asking for a scorpion death drop super move kid! Turn back!

Well that was disappointing!!! I mean Raw was good but man…. Lesson to be learned – stop taking the p!$$ out of the show of shows. That blasted in your face if you ask me….

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE, THE SMACK TALK CENTRE OR BDSIR NETWORK.

Monday Night Raw #1121: November 17, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer

You know what? Every year I delete the data from my WWE games off my PS3 to make space for the new one… for some reason one mind told me NOT to delete 2K14…. I’m glad I didn’t… now I’m hearing that the PS4/XB1 versions of the game ain’t all that either… like dayuuuuum! Seriously it might as well have been an upgrade like Street Fighter, where I downloaded the upgrade to Ultra Street Fighter IV and sh!t… don’t get me wrong, I like the game… but not able to put Ain’t No Grave to Undertaker’s entrance or Method Man’s ‘Kane’ to Kane’s entrance is unforgivable…not to mention NO LAYLA in the game… HEINOUS. 2K Games: GET IN THE CHAIR!!!!

Will the Authority survive? Or will the IWC be subject to Cena’s rule? Everybody, wants to rule the world… shout out to Tears For Fears…. RAW #1121! HOL’DAT -BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZNow we gotta deal with this grumpy cat… which I’m sure is WWE taking the p!$$ out of the IWC because what are they? GRUMPY! Yeah I said it! Don’t mistake me, Infamous Informer, Wolverhampton’s Last Outlaw, Grant Body – P! for one of YOUUUUUU!!!!

Oh no not the authority!! RAW opens with ANOTHER Team Authority segment???? Ok backing Team Cena! ARE YOU MAD???? After what Triple pulled last week…. LONG LIVE THE AUTHORITY!!!!

Ok Stephanie you just described Kane as sick and twisted monster… you gonna give him his mask??? You better!!!!!

Enough chat from Triple & Steph…. Ryback is out here – Feed Me More of that pu$$y Steph!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Why you bringing up old sh!t Steph? Footage of Cena running down Ryback and sh!t…. they had their beef back last year… I see what you tryna do Steph! Working brain and sh!t!!!

Ok Ryback playing that ‘Austin’ role… I’m on the side I’ve always been on, and that’s MINE!

Yes Luke Harper! Listen to Triple TEEF! DECIMATE DOLPH ZIGGLER! KILLLLLL HIM!!!

YES!!! Patterson & Brisco start brukk up Ziggler! Rollins lick him down with the briefcase! The match nah start yet! THIS IS GREAT!

OH SNAP! It’s for the Intercontinental title and sh!t! Come on ref let’s go! Ring the bell damnit!

OH SNAP!!!! KISS MI NECKBACK! LUKE HARPER – NEW INTERCONTINENTAL….. CHAMPION!!!! WOOOOOOOO!!!!! I feel like dancing like Triple Teef and sh!t!

….and Seth Rollins – Curb stomp to Ziggler – BLAOW!!!!! WROOOOOOOOY!!!!! First Great Khali is let go, now Ziggler get buss arse! SHOUT OUT TO ICE CUBE!

Oh my god this grumpy cat is real! I thought it was a still picture that posted memes!

What is this? The Bunny wants a piece of Natalya??? Who gives a f**k about the Adam Rose/ Tyson Kidd match? well certainly not me! The Bunny got taste in women if you ask me!!!

Mi nah understand all this nonsense between Bray Wyatt & Dean Ambrose… f**k all that cryptic sh!t – just fight damnit! I do know this: Both of em are not all there in their headtop!

In Prisoner Cell Block, they call it Solitary. In WWE. they call it the doghouse! Talk sh!t, and you get f**ked up every week. In the case of Cesaro…. he’s about to be f**ked up by Ryback…

Will you three muthaf***az (Cole/Lawler/JayBee) stop talking about what would happen if the Authority loses at Survivor Series and call the damn match???? Two talented muthaf***az – Ryback and Cesaro and that’s all you mans can chat bout…. BLODCLART!!!

STC Survivor Series 2014

Lana, I am disappointed at you & Rusev, I thought you would have desecrated the US title by now and created a Russian title….

That is f**ked up – to advertise the Survivor Series that is FREE… while UK cats still have to pay £14.95 for that rarse!

Oh Lana just said SHUT-TUP to the fans…. my tingz stand up again!!! And Lana put the US on blast about Kim Kardashian showing her @$$ all over the internet! WTF?!!! Lana wants to show the world her topless pics??? Have we gone TV14 suddenly??? Well fear not, if Lana won’t show us… I WILL!!!

LANA BRA

Heath Slater – WHERE ARE YOU GOING??? Send for the Accolade Rusev!!! If Swagger could beat him, Big E, Mark Henry, Big Show… what chance did you have???? You dyam arse!

Er Erick Rowan…that cat is not Renée Young….. er…. even Miz & Sandow look confused… making these Wyatt man look fool… they supposed to be scary and sh!t!

What’s Stephanie doing? She’s not about to trouble Big Show is she? Remember when she slapped him up and f**ked with him? She’s f**k!ng with him now….

WHOA!!!! Induct Big Show into the Hall of Fame 2015 if he steps down from Cena’s team? Think about it Show! Remember how Steph & Triple f**ked with you last year!!!

WTF? Suddenly Sheamus is an illegal citizen? Is this where you come in Zeb Colter? Well do your job jabroni! Oh that’s right – Rusev f**ked you up at Summerslam! YOU B!TCH!

Hang on – they fight for a championship opportunity? I thought Cena got that already! Nah I smell a rat here! Stephanie wukkin brain as usual to take down Team Cena… all this Authority dissecting sh!t they doing is only telling me that Team Cena gonna win at Survivor Series… I hope it’s not the case! But I’m not gonna tweet my displeasure at Triple! I’m not like you Internet Wrestling B!tches! All Stephanie has to do is give back Kane his mask! No need for this divide & conquer sh!t!!!

There you go! I knew full well neither was getting title shot! Rusev & Mark Henry out to finish the both of em! OH SNAP!!! Mark Henry setting up the announce table! Mark Henry with the world’s strongest slam to Sheamus – BLAOW!!! THATS WHAT I DO!!!!

I can’t lie Brie looks sexy dressed up as AJ!!!! GOD DAYUUUUM!!! Sorry Danny… and sorry Philip for that matter… I gotta send for the Cocoa Butter…GRANT THAT'S WHAT I DO

GRANT BODY – P!!!

If you gonna chant CM P**K… you might as well chant Cena & Danny as well!

UH-OH!!! Was Brie meant to do that? Pin her sister like that??? Er that was cool considering she was meant to be Nikki’s assistant which was a ridiculous storyline if you ask me… and I love women! There is so much Nikki could have done… supposed to be hated but it only has guys wanting to f**k Nikki Bella even more!

Look at Brie celebrating like a fool with AJ on that Danny Bryan sh!t… AJ with a kick to the mid section of Brie… DDT into the canvas – BLAOW!!!

8 man tag team contest??? On Raw? Fatal 4 Way Tag Team Championship match at Survivor Series??? NO NO NO NO NO NO!!!!! It should be the other way round! Why call this sh!t Survivor Series? You might as well call it WWE…..er….WWE…. Fully Loaded or some sh!t like that! WWE wonders why the Smack Talk Centre ain’t organising sh!t til the Royal Rumble! But believe me when I say – that sh!t is gonna be OFF THE HOOK!!! THEY SHOOTING! AH MADE YOU LOOK!

Trust the Miz to act like a B!TCH! Tags MizDow, the crowd loves him. Then he tags himself back in instantly… I hope he gets BUSS ARSE!

So… if the Authority has f**ked up Cena’s team apart from Cena… who else gonna sign the contract for this match??? I wonder if Vincent Kennedy might come out and switch sh!t up??? Ok I’m probably asking too much…

What’s wrong with Triple Teef? he sounds worried and sh!t…. now he’s tryna convince himself – THEY…WILL…NOT…LOSE!!!

HA! HA! Triple don’t give me joke… looking for Cena’s ‘teammates’… We can’t see them!!!

Triple is killing me! He’s going to sleep through Cena’s promo!!!! He can’t do that!

HAHA! Ok that was funny… Cena says when he’s done with Rollins he will be cleaning toilets!!! HA! HA! I gotta rate Cena for trying to sway me to back his team!

Seems like it will take more than beat downs to take out Ziggler & Big Show – but here’s the twist – Eric Rowan has joined Cena’s team???? BACKSIDE!!!! So has Ryback!!! So wait there – Sheamus is out the game now…. what de rarse??!!! I should back Team Cena but I’m sorry – my hatred for Dolph Ziggler run deep – I can’t put it aside – plus two of my favourite dudes – Rusev & Mark Henry ride for the Authority… did Cena just put Triple TEEF through the announce table??? HE CAN’T DO THAT!!!!

He just did – BLAOW!!! Now I know Team Authority GOT THIS!!!!

OFFICIAL STC SURVIVOR SERIES 2014 THEME SONG: THE LOX – SURVIVOR

OFFICIAL STC SURVIVOR SERIES 2014 THEME SONG: THE LOX – SURVIVOR

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#GWARNYUHBED

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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Monday Night Raw #1077: January 13, 2014!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw

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The Infamous Informer

What a week in wrestling last week eh??!!!!

Too Cool & Rikishi have STILL GOT IT.

DDP & Booker T acting a fool before getting caught by Ron Simmons…

Roddy Piper standing up to The Shield.

The entire wrestling world in absolute shock when Jake ‘The Snake’ Roberts music hit and he came through the curtain.

Surely WWE can forgive Dean Ambrose for marking out when Jake threw ‘Damien’ on him???

Mae Young trolling the wrestling fans… “R.I.P. Mae Young….” (I’m still here muthaf***az!!! And I’ll get my ‘puppies’ out one more time if I see another FB status saying that sh!t!)

The WWE Network has now been announced… and THE GRANT SAYS THIS: those who are NOT sending for it DOES NOT have a VALID reason, and is NOT a TRUE WRESTLING FAN. You are no longer entitled to say sh!t when someone becomes WWE Undisputed Champion…Us crazy folk in the UK gotta wait til early 2015!

Anyone would think it was my birthday… OH SNAP!!!!!!

I don’ expect this weeks Raw to top last week… but you’ll never know. RAW #1077! HOLD ‘DAT  – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZIs this how it goes down in the streets??? The Usos Vs Daniel Bry- er I mean Danny Wyatt and Bray Wyatt to jump off the show? I approve this intro!

Shout out to Jerry Lawler who is back in effect this week on commentary! Wearing his old school jacket as well! Shout out to JAY-BEE (JBL) for pointing out that the fans will chant for Daniel Bryan no matter what his personal chess moves are!!!

By Harper & Rowan getting involved and causing a disqualification… is that Bray Wyatt’s way of styling out the fact that he can’t last in the ring more than 5 minutes???? (Shout out to STC’s Anthony Cardenas!!!)

So let me get this right so I can understand this: For every loss/disqualification… Danny Wyatt sacrifices himself to Bray??? He really is the ‘dog’ in Unleashed!!!

2005_unleashed_poster_001

Unleashed Jet LI

Remember the great contest between John Cena & Damien Sandow last October? Well ever since then that has burning Sandow’s soul like Ether and he hasn’t been the same… he couldn’t defeat Cena with his bad arm… now that Cena is 100%…. can he beat him now???

Sandow now has a new super move submission? He realises that he has to step his game up now that there is only one belt!

Hold up – did Cena just use another new move??? WHOA!!! He’s gotta face the wrath of Vincent Kennedy surely!

Meme courtesy of STC member Lee Steadx

Cena wins! Well what did you expect IWC jabronies? He has to gain momentum going into the championship match at the Royal Rumble!!! NOW SHUDDUP!

OH SNAP!! Old School Raw NAH DUN! The New Age Outlaws team up with CM Punk to take on The Shield in a Smackdown rematch??? YEAAAAH BOYEE!!!

Dayum my girl Chilli from TLC is down with the WWE Network??!!! Well from time she’s getting it, What’s your excuse for not getting it you dumb muthaf***az?Chilli

Chilli @officialchilli 9 Jan

I can watch every @WWE PPV ever?.. past n present? WCW n ECW too?? Mannnn gotta get @WWENetwork Feb 24th! Luv my wrestling:)))

RECORD SKIP!!! The Wyatt Brudda (Bray & Danny) Vs The Uso Brudda AGAIN??? In a Steel Cage match? But the sh!t is chained up? And My Hero Kane got the key??? This is basically a tag team mini Hell In A Cell!!!!

YES!!! THE GREATEST THING EVER JUST HAPPENED ON RAW! FINALLY THAT BASTARD ZEB COLTER GOOSE COOK! THE BIG SHOW WITH THE SEAN PRICE PUNCH – PPPPPPPPPPPP!!!! THROUGH SCHOOLBUSES!!!

I loved how JAY-BEE was cussing that Zeb is somebody’s grandfather… Well THE GRANT SAYS that if he has any grandkids… they too should be overjoyed!!! YEAH I SAID IT! Let’s play some SEAN P!!!

WHAAAAT!! You wanted the muthaf***!n Attitude Era back!!! Look here now! New Age Outlaws in effect!!! CM Punk! The Shield! If you’re not down with that, they got two words for ya!!! SUCK IT!!!!

Lillian Garcia – MUTHAF**- That red dress she have on…. I wanna tear it off!!! NO I’M NOT POSTING A LINK OF THAT TUNE – LADY IN RED! We don’t do that over here – this is RePP!N4U! Represent The Real Hip Hop!!!

I find it interesting that JAY-BEE loves pointing out that The Shield took out The Undertaker and he hasn’t been seen since… that’s it Jay-Bee keep stirring the pot.. if I know Undertaker, he’s on some Batman Ninja Stealth sh!t, and will take out The Shield one by one!

Holy – did Roman Reigns just do the DX Suck It chop to the New Age Outlaws??? DISRESPECT!!! And I like Roman Reigns!

RECORD SKIP!!! The New Age Outlaws turned their back give CM Punk??? But why???? TELL ME WHY!!

…..WAIT! I FIGURED IT OUT!!!

Think about it!!! The New Age Outlaws – they are apart of whom? D-Generation X! Who is the founding members of that crew? Shawn Michaels & Triple TEEF! Who has CM Punk being disrespecting lately? TRIPLE TEEF! They are all bredrin! TRIPLE TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!!! Some of you have done the knowledge already.. and I smell it – CM Punk Vs Triple TEEF and WrestleMania XXX???

Hang on – The Funkadactyls Vs AJ Lee & Tamina? That’s 4 of my favourite women! NO! THIS IS NOT RIGHT!!!!BDSIR LAYLA GRANT

AJ Lee – 211 days of WWE Divas Champion!!! GWARN GIRL!

Cameron takes the L… but AJ Lee and Tamina continue to be TEEF! Naomi BEXXX!!!! So hold on… does this mean Naomi could be in line for the Divas title at the Royal Rumble?

WHAAAAAAAAT!!! And to think… that WWE put out a DVD called the Destruction of the Ultimate Warrior, Had several superstars running his clart… and now they induct him in the Hall Of Fame! THAT IS #BESTFORBUSINESS!!!

Ultimate Warrior Hall Of fame

Remember back in the days? When Randall was so TEEF that he even got Kofi Kingston BEX??? Now I see a happy-go-lucky Kingston going to the ring! Come on Kofi!!! Where is that RUTHLESS AGGRESSION! What happened to the guy that took a baseball bat and f**ked up Randall’s car? Went to Madison Square Garden and f**ked Randall up???

OH SNAP!!! KINGSTON MUST HAVE HEARD ME!!! Kofi Kingston just defeated Randall Orton!!!! LAWD HAVE MERCY! Randall talking sh!t about everybody wants to f**k him up…now that means Kofi can actually fight for the title!

UH-OH!!! Now the voices in his head are talking to him! They told him to knock Cena’s dad the f**k out!!! Randall you’ve DONE IT NOW!!! You don’t beat down next man’s family suh like that!!! DISRESPECT! That’s somebody DADDY – FOOL!

OH SNAP!!!! My girl Chilli from TLC just retweeted The Infamous Informer!

Chilli retweeted you

39m:

Rybaxel go sidung!!! You ain’t beating The Rhodes Brudda them! NOW GO TO YOUR ROOM!!!

Yes!!! Bertie is coming out to have a contest with Rey Mysterio! You know what that means! Lillian speaking Spanish!!! I said it before… if a woman is talking Spanish to me while I’m working her pum-pum – my super-sperm will shoot out like a champagne bottle after shaken! FREE AT LAST! FREE AT LAST!!!

Now I understand!!! Bertie mash-up Mysterio arm because he’s Batista’s bredrin!!!! Bertie you are a don but Batista is gonna f**k you up!!!

Big up the New England Patriots!!! They reppin at Raw with the classic WWF Championship Belt!! You know the one that Hulk Hogan, Yokozuna and Bret hart and famously known for holding???

OK MAIN EVENT TIME! THE USO BRUDDA! THE WYATT BRUDDA! STEEL CAGE MATCH! KANE LOCK DE DOOR! LET’S GO!!!

OH SNAP! The Usos! With a double back drop to Bryan from the top rope – BLAOW!!!

UH-OH!!! The Usos win again!!! Does that mean Danny Wyatt is gonna get f**ked up again??

SWITCH!!!! Bray went for the Sister Abigail super move! Danny said – NAH! F**K THAT!!! He kicked Bray all over that damn cage!!! Took off his boiler room attire! Rid himself of the Wyatt name! The Dog turned on his Master!!!

If you want my honest opinion, I think this storyline was meant to go on longer… but WWE must have picked up on this video recently… OBSERVE….

GRANT BODY – P!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GWARNYUHBED

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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Smack Talk Centre Raw – Monday Night Raw #1055: August 12 2013

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SMACK TALK CENTRE RAW

Smack Talk Centre-Raw

Monday Night Raw #1055: August 12, 2013!!!

YO! YO! Put your f**k!n fingaz up, muthaf***az! Coz if you don’t give a f**k like we don’t give a f**k PUT YOUR MUTHAF**K!N FINGAZ IN THE AIR!!!

OFFICIAL Smack Talk Centre Summerslam Theme Song: Ja Rule & The Murderers – ‘We Don’t Give a F**K’

This is how it goes down! Once friends now enemies fighting over a leather briefcase! NXT Sistrins now NXT Nemesis team up with their respective men to go at it tag team style! Someone is gonna get BURNT! Can David bring down Goliath? Will the IWC go YES! YES! YES! or NO! NO! NO! and make angry YouTube videos forgetting to wash themself first?

It’s the RAW before SUMMERSLAM!!!! #1055! HOLD DAT – BLAOW!!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZBefore I go in, I just wanna say that Total divas on E! is THE MOVE! Ssssssssshhhh! Don’t tell the wrestling purists! They will get mad if you watched Total Divas over G1 CLIMAX this past weekend! F**K THAT – IT’S ABOUT A WOMAN’S WORTH! I don’t watch wrestling 24-7 jabroni!!!

I should have known that if Brad Maddox is the referee, something was gonna go down with the Wack Barrett Vs Danielson match…. Danielson missed the YES Kick, Barrett rolls up the kid, and the scrawny Maddox used a fast count!!!! TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF! Look at the sissy Maddox reminding Danielson that he can shut down the main event if Danielson does something rash… I would have f**ked him up same way, because I know Triple would rectify the situation right! GM or no GM, Danielson you should have kicked him down! You think Austin would have thought twice? it would be an instant STUNNER!!!

I wanna big up Cody Rhodes… you know why? He threw that stupid fisher price My First Briefcase in the drink a few weeks ago, and now Sandow get himself a nice sensible leather briefcase! Very good Cody! I still hope Sandow f**ks you up at Summerslam! Don’t expect much praise from me!

Interesting… Cody Rhodes claims that Sandow WILL NOT become the World Heavyweight Champion before he does…. WELL THE GRANT SAYS you might be right… but the moment you’re champion and you just had a gruelling match, who do you think would cash in his cheque against you??? You wanna think about that!

Why is there all this talk about Sandow & Randall cashing their cheque at Summerslam? I can sorta understand in the case of Randall… but let me tell you NOW: They are NOT gonna cash in!!! It’s what everyone expects! F**K THAT! Come check me next week and know that I’m right!

Big ups to Dean Ambrose!!! He just said that if the ghost of André The Giant is not in the Battle Royal then NO ONE STC Summerslam 2013CAN BEAT HIM for the US Title!!!  Now the rest of the Summerslam card is getting put together!

Wack theme song that WWE has chosen…. some bullsh!t @$$ tune by 2Chainz? We don’t do that over here THIS IS THE STC! Cage Amateurs UK! THIS IS HIP HOP! (Just check the tune above, top of the blog!

Yo CM Punk, I asked you before, I’ll ask you again… did you just quote another hip hop quotable? “You come at the King, you best not miss…”???? Sorry readers you don’t follow…. observe…

Big ups to Big E Langston! He said what I’ve said all along…Ziggler needed him to win his matches… Langston didn’t need Ziggler at all! YES! That’s the SISSY you support! Some of you have sons, and you are telling your sons that a wrestler wearing pink brief and whines himself and ‘twerks it’ is OK????? WAKE THE F**K UP MUTHAF***AZ!!!

SHOCK! HORROR!!!! Natalya defeated AJ! No need to go to specsavers – YOU SAW RIGHT!!! Natalya won a match!!! Natalya for women’s champion STRAIGHT AWAY!!!

UH OH!!! Somebody’s in trouble…trrrrouble… TRRROUBLE!!! Brad Maddox must answer to Vincent Kennedy!!! He could be fired right now!!!

Now he wants to be the ref for Cena Vs Danielson at Summerslam????? TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!!

GRANT - BODY - P…and just as Vincent Kennedy was about to appoint the Sissy Maddox guest referee, Triple puts a stop to that ONE TIME! Now Triple Teef is the guest referee!!!! Right you unwashed IWC idiots, I hear you saying ‘Overkill’ on the main event, why don’t you shut the f**k up for a minute… Triple claims he’s got everything on lock, I’m not so sure! Last time I check, Triple was the ref for the John Cena Vs CM Punk match two years ago, and what happened? Kevin Nash f**ked it up for CM Punk!!! Just reminding you… IT’S WHAT I DO!!!

That’s it Kane! Out-think the Wyatt massive! I see you rude boy! Using an Undertaker mind game! Disappear out the ring and appear at the other side!!! Drop the FYRE on em!!! the fire is the purification!!! But yo! Bray Wyatt is loving everything!!! This Ring of Fire/Inferno match is gonna be MAAAAAAAAD!!!!

You know what’s even better at Summerslam? 2 Divas matches!!!! Brie Bella and Natalya catch up!!! Natalya gave the b!tch slap last week – Brie turns the other cheek! She’s only doing what was written in the good book! Brie is bringing her girls – Nikki and that troublesome red-head Eva Marie, Natalya bringing my favourite Nubians – Cameron & Naomi! YEAAAH BOYEEEEE! You jabronies hit the bathroom at that time – give me a bucket of fried chicken and a supermalt and I’ll enjoy this sh!t!!! Yeah! I’m not a pro wrestling fan so what!!!! At least not any more!!!

Oh f**kin hell, These so-called Real Americans… time to have a p!$$…. Oh Zeb Coulter SHUT THE F**K UP…

Hold up – did Zeb just wish death on 2.5 so called ethnic minorities??? If you still a Coulter fan I am liable to punch you in your f**k!n mouth.

Ok Usos – don’t let these bigots beat you this time! If they beat you, you have disgraced Rikishi, Haku, Superfly Snuka, Umaga, Tamina, Roman Reigns, The Rock, and most importantly, High Chief Peter Maivia!!!!

YES! YES! YES! YES! I’m feeling like Danielson right now!!! GWARN USOS!!! The stars and legends are proud!!!! IT’S ALL ABOUT THIS SAMOAN FIST!!!!

Now for some serious sh!t…. The Miz got Cena and Danielson on his show, and was told by Danielson to stop his noise before he boxes him in his mouth! Cena spouts the same sh!t, it is real talk what he says though, he deals with critics every day, he knows he hears them (and by that, he means you IWC) go on about his 5 moves of doom and his make a wish stories… but Danielson says he’s in this sh!t for the WRESTLING!! That Cena is a parody of this wrestling sh!t!!! Which weighs out more? Hold up Cena used the dreaded W word – WRESTLING! BACKSIDE!!!! Yo I gotta song for the both of you, but before I do, Cena goes on like he’s beaten everybody…. NEWSFLASH!!! You haven’t beaten Undertaker rude boy! Now for the tune…. It’s a shame, people in the rap game, only in it for the fame extra-large!!!!

Cena is not a WRESTLER? The respect isn’t there? Triple comes out to maintain order? Randall reminds em what he got in his hand? SH!T JUST GOT REAL!

Now let’s have some fun… what the f**k has R-Truth done to his hair???? Has he relaxed his hair or something?

Quote of the night comes from Jerry Lawler – “I bet you wanna dance with Summer Rae, dial 1-800-YOU WISH!!”

Don’t you love that when Fandango gets buss arse, he still can breathe enough to say what his name is? Why does Summer Rae continue to hang around with this sissy?

Ok Battle Royal jump off!!!! The winner, gets to fight Dean Ambrose for the US Title…. in YouTube!!!! Is it worth the hassle? I could back certain guys here but it’s for the US title, I mean big up to Ambrose for putting prestige on it, but it’s like, you dep pon YouTube!

Big up Kofi for using crazy skillz and agility to hold out in the Battle Royal! But those racist bastards had to eliminate him didn’t they? BACKSIDE! Well at least Usain Bolt and Shelly-Ann Fraser Pryce represented in the championships lately! Trust in my hero Mark Henry to eliminate the racist bastards! THAT’S WHAT HE DO!!! RESPECT!

Big ups to RVD for taking Mark Henry out to face Dean Ambrose! It’s a shame we won’t see them fight at the gathering unless someone hooks up YouTube on their iPh- “WELLLLLLL, IT’S THE BIG SHOW!!!” BACKSIDE!!! Just when the Shield was gonna move in on Mark Henry and RVD, Mr Iron Clad contract appears ready to bring the ruckus! Did you see the look on Seth Rollins face??? He was like – OH SH!T!!!! Now I get it!!! RVD fights Ambrose, Mark Henry & Big Show combine their force against the tag team champions. As for the Ryback….sh!t just hasn’t been the same since John Cena called the Ambulance on his @$$!!!

Ok here’s the main event! Yo what happened to Heyman’s ECW music???? Sound bwoy! DJ! Fix up man!

Summerslam MarvelIT’S A TRAP!!! Screamed the IWC and the WWE Universe! Well no sh!t Sherlock!!! Now according to Heyman, it’s up to Punk to play the ‘stupid hero’ and get buss arse, or not turn up at all and be a ‘smart coward’. Thankfully for Punk, he was neither… Wolverine knows about stealth techniques!!!! Disguised as a camera man, took the camera, beat it over Brock’s head with it – BLAOW!!!!! Grabbed a chair, took advantage of the fallen beast – slam it in his back bone – BLAOW!!! Heyman’s legs did run!!! And again, not one scratch pon him face!!!! It’s just like Paul Bearer back in the day – he always got away from getting buss arse by Undertaker after the betrayal and once Undertaker got his hands on Bearer – his goose cook! And soon that will happen to Heyman!

Now earlier in the blog I said that the quote of the night came from Jerry Lawler, well our survey says – NOT REALLY! It came from a random fan and it went a little something like this:

Cena: I’ve beaten HBK, Triple, JBL, The Rock, CM Punk…

Daniel Bryan: You call their names like they are better than me…

Random fan: THEY ARE!!!!

DROP THE BOMB ON EM!!!!!!

ARE YOU READY FOR SUMMERSLAM NOW??? THE BATTLEGROUND IS SET!!! BRING THE MUTHAF**K!N RUCKUS! IF YOU DON’T GIVE A F**K LIKE WE DON’T GIVE A F**K PUT YOUR MUTHAF***!N FINGAZ IN THE AIR!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GWARNYUHBED

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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