Tag Archives: Wrestling

Monday Night Raw #1308, June 18, 2018!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw

DAYUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUM!!!

Nikki Bella victoria secret

Nikki, you make me wish you were on the rebound!!!! I can’t be a husband, I can give you babies, they would be smart & beautiful! Good thing they won’t turn out ugly like Dolph Ziggler!

GRANT BODY-P!

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I can see you idiots like – ‘American Bad Ass’ confirmed! YOU FOOL!

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RAW 1308! BOOKER-T IS MY NEW HERO!

Remember – I’m going by what YouTube tells me… so let’s get into it!

All Brock has to do is show up… the moment he does…. BRAUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!! But Brock ain’t afraid of anybody… is he???

Kevin Owens wants to offer congratulations! He has no choice – he can’t manage Braun! Not many can!

“At WrestleMania, when you needed a tag partner, you had to go in the crowd, and pick a 10-year-old kid…” Er Kevin… that was the point! Braun was saying he didn’t need anybody! And that’s the truth!

What is Kevin Owens up to??!!! I cannot figure it out right now!

Looks like Kevin sealed the deal! he doesn’t wanna get brukk up anymore! You think this will save him?

Strowman was gonna drop Owens with that powerslam! But Owens get life!!!

Has Jinder Mahal.. JINDER MAHAL!! Found tranquility? Inner Peace? Seems so… he defeated Chad Gable (poor soul) and felt enlightenment!

Has the B-Team become woken?? Nice touch by Bo Dallas pretending to be Wyatt… GEDDIT?

Wow! You mean Elias is actually gonna sing a full song without getting interrupted?

Dayuuum nuff WWE Superstars got that sellotape on em right? Sheeeeeeeeet WTF they be doin? Cesaro set the trend and everybody follow fashion!

Oh dear… Sasha & Bayley have started their sh!t again… these two just need some good ol’ scissor action! Either that or the tongue!

GRANT BODY-P!

Double R could have waited until Kurt Angle addressed the Brock Lesnar situation! But wait! He’s not a good guy or a bad guy is he? He does what he wants when he wants! Sounds like somebody else we all love and adore! But that’s none of my business…

Uh-oh! Bobby Lashley is chiming in! Now this is good!!! Peeople do wanna see Lashley and Brock clash! My thing is… Braun has the briefcase… so it’s like… that black champion dream could be derailed…

So this is how it’s going! Kurt is gonna announce a multi person match for Extreme Rules… winner fights Brock at the Summerslams… as much as I want it to be Lashley… Braun has the briefcase… now – I’m all for Braun being champion… but I’d rather him cash it on anyone BUT Lashley you feel me?

Now, by doing the knowledge, those multi people could be Elias, Seth Rollins and Finn Balor… Finn NEVER lost the title. Elias just sung a song about Brock… and Seth… well I’ll get to him later!

Meanwhile The Revival are about to get dissed again as they go up against Bobby Lashley and Double R! This is not right WWE!!! The Revival is a wicked team! Why You Do This?

Check it – Lashley hit the Revival with a spear – BLAOW! That’s Double R’s super move! Well true say Lashley did it from marnin though…

Now remember why I said Seth Rollins gonna be in that match? Here’s why – he just lost his intercontinental title to a pink leggings wearing Dolph Ziggler! He can invoke his rematch clause all he wants – Drew Wackintyre will be there as well…

So essentially, Baron Corbin is the new ‘Corporate Kane’…. by that I mean – he now wrestles in his shirt and trousers! And he won as well against Finn Balor! HOLY SMOKES!

So we come to the real issue at hand… Alexa Blitch… look at her talking down to Ronda Rousey! Y’all wonder why I can’t stand Alexa! Said it before I’ll say it again – I’d get my sister to f**k her up!

This is the Ronda Rousey I like! That chick who gets bex! She just gone GHETTO GYAL on Alexa! And she attacked Kurrrrrrrrrrrrrt! OH MY GOD NOT KUUUUUUUUUUUUUURT!!

Ronda Rousey – powerbombed Alexa Blitch through the table – BLAOW!!!

Oh dear, Kurt just suspended Ronda! But in 30 days… Alexa goose COOK!!! I think we are seeing the Summerslam storyline! Ronda has gone to hone her skills! My dream came true once already when Naomi whupped Alexa’s @$$… but this time Ronda can do it! KILL THE B!TCH!

 

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Monday Night Raw #1310, July 2, 2018!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

LIFE IS GOOD!

Germany are out of the World Cup because they are b!tches, the Wimbledon start and the women are running around the court with their little tennis skirts on showing their little panties…and my mixtape has dropped!

Sun is shining, women are looking sexy, and we still have internerds complaining about wrestling!

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1310! Let me get my coffee y’all, or should I get my Rockstar Energy Drink????

The first thing me hear is that Dolph Ziggler and Seth Rollins have an Iron Man match (30 minute) at the Extreme Rules joint… I hear some of you talking about ‘1 hour iron man match…’ but weren’t you the same muthaf***az who complain about the PPVs being too long? To I say this to you internerds…

SEAN PRICE - STFU

Wait a minute – Shayna Blayzer – what is she doing on RAW backstage??? Ooooooh the Summerslam storyline is prepped folks!!!!!

This whole thing with The Shield (Minus Ambrose) and Ziggler & Wackintyre makes me more and more convinced that Bobby Lashley is the one who is going to Summerslam to fight Lesnar (don’t let the dirt sheets and that stupid WrestleTalk show fool you) The whole ‘Lesnar derailing plans bullsh!t is ALL STORYLINE.’ It’s the Summerslam Storyline! I’m not buying any of that sh!t!

Oh no not Dr Shelby???? Ok this sh1t worked for Danny Bryan & Kane but how the rarse is this gonna work?

Why are Wyatt & Hardy allowing this foolishness to continue with The B Team? I have said for weeks now – SEND FOR THE ULTIMATE DELETION! Until that time I will speak NO MORE about this!

It hurts my brain to see such a talented brother in Apollo Crews, doing what he does in the ring, knowing full well that either he or Titus will eat the pin from the Authors of Pain… no shame in losing to them but it’s like yo… these guys should be serious contenders and sh!t!

“Suck up your PRIDE, give me respect and apologise…”

Really Baron Corbin? You gonna use the word PRIDE to a guy who’s T-shirt makes a positive impact and support to the LGBT community???

GRANT BODY-P!

Wait a minute I don’t understand this – if The Revival beat Roman Reigns & Bobby Lashley last week, why are they still tryna beat down Reigns during his match with Rollins Vs Wackintyre and Ziggler?

(Oh I forgot… I’m catching up on YouTube and they don’t put sh!t in order!)

See right here with the combined force of Revival, Wackintyre & Ziggler – could summon the return of Dean Ambrose… hmmm… am I on to something here???

Meanwhile at this anger management sh1t… this to me is just a way to delay creative’s decision on who turns evil out of Bayley & Sasha – I dun told you jabronies neither have turned heel – it’s just a Bayley Vs Sasha situation… THAT’S IT! You know like it was for Brock Vs Undertaker back in 2015?

You know what – I don’t think Dr Shelby can handle these two, word up! He managed to get a ‘goat looking guy’ and a ‘monster who sets things on fire’ to hug but these two women gonna make him wear straight jacket by next week surely!

I got nothing much to say about Ember Moon Vs Liv Morgan apart from two things – 1 – Liv Morgan sold that Total Eclipse move like a BOSS and 2 – God DAYUUUUUUM Ember you fine! In fact f**k that – where’s that Alex Scott chick?

SPORT-PREVIEW-alex-scott

IDGAF – This woman is EVERY FOOTBALL FAN’S DREAM if you don’t fancy this woman – I’m telling you now – you sir are GAY!

GRANT BODY-P!

I’m a firm believer in one on one but this Mojo Rawley is a reptile – the whole of No Way Jose’s crew should rush this muthaf***a and beat out his blodclaaat!

Oh no! Extreme Rules match between Nia Jax and Alexa Blitch! Alexa’s pretty face is gonna get ruined….!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! KILL HER! KILL THE B!TCH! Ronda Rousey gonna be ringside too? TAKE MY MONEY!

See Bobby Lashley claims Roman Reigns would not be THE GUY if Lashley was here during the 10 years, well THE GRANT SAYS – neither would you Lashley… you know why? Lets be real – BECAUSE YOU’RE BLACK!!!! Vincent Kennedy might as well be that dude in that ‘I’m not racist’ video!

Oh dear! Double R is not being professional! Lashley’s intentions are good but Double R is having none of it! Remember boys and girls, he’s not a good guy or a bad guy is he?

..and because of Roman’s ignorance, he would rather get buss arse by The Revival than tag in Bobby Lashley… WOW!

You know I gotta save the best for last right? Braun Strowman Vs Kevin Owens… I’m guessing Kevin must have taken the train or something to get to work because he got no car now!

Kevin Owens car

Hang on – Kevin is running away? But his shirt says FIGHT ANYONE!!! Er….

Kevin is hiding in the toilet? Why would he do that? Is that his way of saying ‘he’s sh1ttin himself?’

OH NO! Braun disguised his voice and Kevin Owens got ketch! Now Braun is taping up the toilet! This is shades of Austin and Goldust surely?

Kevin Owens is like ‘ NO PLEASE!!!! ‘ I’m deddin already!!!

I guess Braun is gonna show mercy! Kevin doesn’t deserve this!

“You still in there Kevin???”

That has to be the lyric of the night! Don’t you get the joke? He locked Kevin in there all that time! Kevin can’t move!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

BRAUN TOOK A RUN UP! AND CHARGED HIMSELF INTO THE PORTABLE TOILET OFF THE STAGE!!! KEVIN IS PROBABLY DEAD BY NOW!!!!

I’M DUN!!!! HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAH!!!

ROFL

THERE’S PEOPLE IN THERE!!! THERE’S PEOPLE IN THERE!!!!!!!

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Monday Night Raw #1309, June 25, 2018!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

Last week I found out that The Infamous Informer weekly blog is 4th in the top UK wrestling blogs according to feedspot.com… for that I wanna take this time to thank everyone who has supported me over the last seven years with this wrestling sh!t… I have cussed your favourite wrestler, written about sexual fantasies over your favourite female wrestler (apart from Paige and Alexa) and you continued to f**k with me. I SALUTE YOU. Maybe you sympathise with me when I cuss certain internerds!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1309! There are three wrestling bloggers better than me… I am gunning for that ‘#1 spot like Ludacris!!!!

So here I am, 5:53am, I couldn’t sleep, the hot weather got the best of me. Half an hour prior to that, I woke up, Naomi was not appearing in my dreams, so I thought, I might as well wake up, scroll my Facebook news feed (as you do) grab a coffee, and see what happened in the World Wrestling Federation.

Clearly this was not the first segment, but this is the first clip YouTube is showing me. Call the Ambulance to pick up Rich & Rex Gibson to pick up the people… put their bodies on the stretcher carry their @$$ out!

Realistically I think Titus and Apollo Crews CAN test the Authors of Pain… but storyline dictates they will only get killed!

Notice the Authors of Pain find themselves back om TV now that SAnitY find themselves on Smackdown…

I find it hard to worship somebody who is so ‘badmind’, and has no manners..so with that said – F**K ALEXA BL!TCH!

GRANT BODY-P!

But I will give credit where credit is due – she countered the fans saying ‘WHAT?’! Very good! Personally, I like the WHAT? chant… but yes it does get annoying. They tried that only ONCE with The Undertaker – didn’t turn out too well…

Shout out to Jamie Lannister….

GRANT BODY-P!

Natalya comes out here on some ‘Time is a precious commodity’ sh!t… remember that storyline when Eric Bischoff had 30 days to turn RAW around? It’s like that with Alexa because in 23 days … Ronda comes back.. and when she does… THAT’S IT!

In the meantime, Alexa Vs Natalya, with Mickie in Alexa’s corner, and Nia Jax in Natalya’s corner… gotta say – Natalya is looking FYYYNE AS A MUTHAF***A!

Hold up!!!! Natalya just made Alexa tap out!!! WHOA! NEW #1 Contender surely! Nia don’t you see what is happening here?

Mojo Rawley thinks he’s the big he-man picking on Todd the Cheeseburger right? Just like that – Todd is over with the crowd… I’m sitting here waiting for the inevitable memes of him being more over than Roman Reigns… GET A LIFE INTERNERDS!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

As soon as Mojo turned his back, if I was Todd The Cheeseburger, I would have kicked him in his d!ck!

Shout out to STC’s Nicola Hardwick…

The B-team want to continue this charade! I’m calling for a FINAL DELETION word up! Stop this foolishness RIGH… wait there… Extreme Rules…. HMMM!!!

Hold on!!! Bray & Matt give B-Team ratings!!! Y’all know they are plotting the Final deletion!

Ok let’s get serious for a minute! Did Roman Reigns just come with a KILLER LYRIC THERE?

“10 years ago, you wanted to be a big MMA Star, and how did that work out huh? You made a REAL BIG ‘IMPACT’…” You think John Cena ghostwritten that lyric for Double R???

GRANT BODY-P!

Er what? Roman Reigns wants to main event WrestleMania 5 times in a row???? Oooh the internerds are not gonna like that!!!!

SWITCH! Kurt Angle said there will NOT be a multi-man match at Extreme Rules!!! Uh-Oh – you think creative changed up sh!t?

“Brock Lesnar doesn’t care about….blah blah blah… in fact, Brock does not give a sh-” ROMAN REIGNS YOUR LANGUAGE!!!

“(Brock’s) tired of seeing your face, just like all these people are…” – GUNSHOT! I think the women would disagree but that’s another story! Bobby Lashley got lyrics too!

DOLPH ZIGGLER VS SETH ROLLINS! THIS IS THE REMATCH! WORLD WRESTLING FEDERATION INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP!

Once again a great back and forth contest! Is that Drew Wackintyre I see about to f**k this up?

That he has… muthaf***a!!! One day somebody gonna come kick his @$$!

YES! That person might just be Roman Reigns!!!! KICK HIS F**K!N @$$!

Spear to Ziggler – BLAOW! Ziggler sold that like a boss!

Man Double R is getting all the TV time isn’t he! I’m guessing this is to make up for the minimal TV time he had last week or the week before! He & Lashley fight The Revival again…I think the Revival should change their name – to The Dead & Buried!

YES I USED THE B-WORD!

HOLD UP!!! The Revival just took advantage of the 1upsman ship of Lashley & Reigns – used a distraction roll up and Reigns got pinned!!! The internerds are gonna celebrate like England buss up Panama 6-1!!!!

WHOA!!!! Bayley has gone OFF on Sasha! Holy smokes! Crowd chanting for Bayley crazy! PIC_0041Guys – I’m not taking it as a heel vs face thing here – that’s out the window – the only way for sure is their promos. If either Bayley or Sasha cusses the crowd… THEN YOU KNOW.

Honestly god everything Strowman does – it’s like the Terminator – every time you see him or T-1000 on-screen it’s like the music follows them… his music should be playing EVERY TIME he’s on-screen!

Wait a second – Braun & Kevin Owens are on the same team? Balor & Corbin on the same team? What is this bizarro land?

Kevin Owens tried the Braun technique of running around the ring – he knocked over Balor but was not so lucky against Corbin!

That was an out-of-order tag by Corbin wasn’t it? He clapped Balor in his head!

OH NO! Balor kicked down Corbin! I should bloody think so!

Hahahahah! The official is counting the guys out and Kevin Owens is counting along with him! That’s cool!

Oh dear I think Kevin Owens did something wrong! He tek foot and run garne!!! Does he realise Braun can run as well?

Kevin is tryna get the f**k outta there!!!

OH NO! Braun has Kevin’s car keys!!! This is bad! Look at Braun’s face!

“Here’s your keys! I hope you got insurance, because there’s you car!” What a nice man Braun is! He gave Kevin his keys!

OH NO! THE CAR MASH UP!!!! SEE THIS IS THE PART WHERE KEVIN OWENS IS THAT DUDE ON FINAL FIGHT AND SAYS ‘OH MY CAR’!!!!

OH MY CAR

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Voted in the top four wrestling blogs.

Monday Night Raw #1307, June 11, 2018!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

Since y’all muthaf***az are not watching the World Wrestling Federation Live because of E3, I’m not watching it live either! I’m not watching E3 either… I GOTTA BETTER THINGS TO DO! Every year the same muthaf***a pops up in my FB inbox like ‘you watching E3’? THE GRANT SAYS – F**K E3! I’M NOT THAT GUY! That gaming aspect of me, getting excited over video games… it died a lonnnnnnnnng time ago!

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1307! COREY GRAVES IS MY NEW HERO!

Screenshot-2018-6-12 Corey Graves ( WWEGraves) TwitterScreenshot-2018-6-12 Corey Graves ( WWEGraves) Twitter(1)Screenshot-2018-6-12 Corey Graves ( WWEGraves) Twitter(2)

YEAH CALM THE F**K DOWN INTERNERDS!!! I’m gonna use that!!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

I’m guessing this is how RAW & Smackdowns gonna start, with ladders in the ring and muthaf***az arguing about who is winning this sh!t…

BUMBACLAAAAAT LOOK AT BARON CORBIN HEADTOP! Did I miss a hair vs hair match or something?

Kevin Owens giving me joke! Saying Braun is too damn big!!!!

Even Alexa Blitch is giving me joke! That was a great line I admit!

“Y’all sounding like the Real Housewives of WWE!”

Did you see Braun’s face when Alexa says he’s gonna win? He was like ‘yeah you’re gonna get this d!ck’!

GRANT BODY-P!

OMG look at Breezango… getting more and more cumse-cumsa! What the f**k is all this frilly sh!t going on? I’m no fan of Ziggler & Wackintye, but I hope they buss up their clart!

Nice to see Roman Reigns smiling! Probably because he knows the WWE are editing out the boos for YouTube!

The Grant Says The B Team might be doing their thing… but I hope they get deleted!!! If Hardy & Wyatt can send for the lake of reincarnation and throw those B Team muthaf**az in there… then they can be one big happy family! Especially for Bo Dallas & Wyatt!

So the Riott Squad are going to start taking black lipstick and branding their opponents after they beat them down? Very NWO-ish don’t you think?!!!

You know what – let’s throw a pic of this woman… FOR NO REASON!

Mandy Rose

HOLY SMOKES THOSE BREASTS THOUGH!!!! Even the top she got on is saying – GOD DAYUUUUUUUUUUM!

WTF does Curt Hawkins have on? That’s some cumse-cumsa sh!t too! I’m glad No Way Jose boxed him down like that! 0-201 now muthaf***a! You lucky this ain’t UFC! You lose twice and that’s it – you’re GONE!

GRANT BODY-P!

The question remains – who was that long black-haired girl in the No Way Jose parade?

Wait a minute – has Sami Zayn brought the Stone Cold Steve Austin Skullbuster to WWE? There’s even a bell at the end of the rope climb!

Sami Zayn’s Skullbuster was SAWFT! Lashley knocked it out in less than a minute! Zayn didn’t like that sh!t so what does he do? Assault Lashley!

Elias just told me RAW was in Little Rock Arkansaw! Not really a ‘wrestling crowd’ is it?

Look at that – it’s a custom – made guitar for when Elias wins the Intercontinental joint at Money In The Bank! Did my dude Askem paint that for you?

Oh no! Rollins just noticed the Custom made guitar! Crowd be like – BURN IT DOWN! So why doesn’t Rollins do just that? Light a match and burn that muthaf***a? But I suppose stamping on it works just as well…

Money In the Bank 2018

Ooooooh it looks like Ronda Rousey has improved on her mic skills! She has put in serious time down there at the performance center! SHE IS RONDA ROUSEY! AND SHE IS BORN READY!

She wasn’t ready for that headbutt from Nia though!

Ronda sending for the arm bar! Nia trying to block! Can Ronda get it? YES!!! NIA WAS TAPPING LIKE A BEEEEEATTTCH! HOLY SMOKES!

Bobby Roode, Kevin Owens and Finn Balor combing their force to take Braun Strowman out the game! I got a bad feeling about this!

Kevin Owens with a frog splash off the top of the ladder to Strowman through a table – BLAOW!

And even with those super moves, Braun STILL got up!!!!

Hit Owens with the Running Powerslam on the ladder – BLAOW! One, Two and…. THREE!

This one didn’t end in me deddin on the floor, But I know who will be deddin – VIRGIN MEDIA if I don’t pay those bills!

GRANT BODY-P!

 

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Monday Night Raw #1304, May 21, 2018!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

MEGHAN NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

I just wanna take this time to big up Prince Harry and Meghan Markle. The Duke and Duchess of Sussex… Some sound advice from the Infamous Informer: Get your own supply at ALL TIMES. Learn Shaolin Kung Fu, some wrestling moves (strong style with a bit of Undertaker style preferred) and invest in some vibranium! YOU SAW THE LOOK THE QUEEN GAVE YOU??!!! She wants to KILL!!!!

Queen death look

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RAW 1304! I’m on the YouTube tip… I have been told it wasn’t that hot…

Say what? Baron Corbin like to collect human skulls?? Since when did this head reclining muthaf***a become the predator?

GRANT BODY-P!

No Way Jose lose again! I mean… was he called up from NXT to be a jobber??? Not good for you homie!

Have we gotta watch The B-Team Vs Breezango again??? Oh that’s ok – it didn’t last long – Breezango acting like a faggot as usual cost him the match, and now the B Team are rolling around on the canvas like Billy & Chuck… Lord help me…

Chad Gable is going nowhere fast… sorry kid, you need your bredrin back. American Alpha should never have split up. And that’s real.

Bobby Roode Vs Elias again?!!! What is this – The best of seven series????

The beef between Double R & Jinder Mahal. JINDER MAHAL! Continues! (see when you mention the modern-day mararrrrrrraja you have to say – Jinder Mahal. JINDER MAHAL!

Kevin Owens & Jinder Mahal. JINDER MAHAL! Putting the beats to Double R when suddenly – BURN IT DOWN!!!!! Seth Rollins sends for the tandem engine!!!

DISRESPECT!!!! Sami Zayn gets guys to dress up in drag to diss Bobby Lashley? Are you serious right now… Ok fans – you are allowed to complain on the internet… If I was the crowd I would walk out word up…

WTF is Lashley wearing? Looks like some tight up sh!t… NO LASHLEY! Wear Roc-a-Wear jeans! What a good thing I didn’t watch this sh!t last night…

Let’s move on to the nicer things in life… The LADIES!!!!

Ember Moon Vs Alexa Bliss – I hope Ember beats out Alexa’s blodclart!

Mickie James tried to teef by taking off her show and lickin’ Ember Moon with it! Hey you’re not Ember’s mother??!!! Brings back memories!!!

GRANT BODY -P!

Mickie got ketch by the referee! God dayuuuum Mickie OWWWWWWWWWWW!! Ref – send her to my yard!! Girl looking fine like that – dayuuuuuuuuuuum!PIC_0038

Alexa tried a distraction roll up! Ember Moon BEXXXXXXXXXXXXX!!! Alexa ‘fraid now!

Ember Moon hit the Eclipse – BLAOW!!!! That’s my girl! EMBER MOON!!!

Wait a minute… Ronda Rousey gets a title shot against Nia Jax and suddenly Stephanie shows up??? I smell a rat here!

Kurt Angle & Stephanie in the ring… the intense sexual chemistry is still there! These two cannot lie to me!

Now look what you done Stephanie… you gone and mentioned Roman Reigns name…

I don’t know about you guys but I like Double R’s ‘Samoan Temper’! Yeah Stephanie – watch your tone girl! Or d!ck in your mouth!

GRANT BODY-P!

“You don’t want me near that Universal Championship, or that Money In the Bank contract…” Er Double R… you couldn’t be more wrong!!

Ha! Ha! Haaaaaaaaah! Look at Kevin Owens! putting his arm on Stephanie’s shoulder! Stephanie looks like she gonna say – GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME you McDonalds eating Jeremy Kyle muthaf***a!

Well she did… not in so many words!

Am I seeing right? Dana Brooke is in the ring fighting??? STOP PRESS! STOP THE ROYAL HONEYMOON! Harry if you are having sexual intercourse with Meghan STOP and PULL OUT RIGHT NOW! THIS IS HUGE!

GRANT BODY-P!

Natalya joins Alexa, Becky, Charlotte & Ember in the Money in the Bank ladder Match! Fantastic!

Yes the sequence of events are muddled up – I’m just going by what YouTube showed me ok?!!! I do have the common sense to know that the Kurt/Steph/Roman/Owens segment came on first leading to a singles match which ended in Jinder Mahal. JINDER MAHAL! being teef which made Seth Rollins Burn It down and now it’s turned into a tag match!

Jinder Mahal. JINDER MAHAL! Couldn’t take the pressure! The Shield won the match but dude is beating them down with steel chairs!

I don’t understand why Braun Strowman and Finn Balor are fighting each other but this is what we have! Braun Strowman tried that running around the ring sh!t but Balor was ready for him – Slingblade!!!

Oh man! Finn Balor giving Strowman such a fight that Strowman had to pull down his straps! Not even Brock Lesnar has made him do that!

Look at Stephanie trying to stir the pot with the contract signing! Something tells me Ronda Rousey and Nia Jax are gonna rush Stephanie and beat out her blodclart! At least that’s how I would armchair book it!

Stephanie thinks Ronda will tek foot and gone out of WWE if Nia beats her! That’s f**ked up! I’m sure Ronda knew what she signed up for!

Look at Nia! She looks like the super meter is building within her!!!

Ronda Rousey is left-handed! My family believes that left handed people are some clever muthaf***az!

Maybe Stephanie’s plan worked! Contracts are signed, hands are shook, eyes locked on, and look in the middle in the background that evil Stephanie! Is there a picture of this?

ronda-rousey-nia-jax-contract-signing-mitb-raw-20035693-1280x0

STEPHANIE TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!! That is straight VINCENT KENNEDY RIGHT THERE!

STC 2018 logo3

Monday Night Raw #1302, May 7, 2018!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

SERIOUSLY???

backlash-fans-leaving

WALKING OUT THE JOINT? It couldn’t have been THAT BAD???

Guys – he didn’t win the World Wrestling Federation Championship… you do know that right?

You know what – your actions makes me NOT wanna write this blog word up!

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1302! Ok I do agree with you guys, Samoa Joe Vs Double R should NOT have been the main event… that’s taking the p!$$!

I got those big @$$ hula hoops, spicy chilli flavor, mint aero (actually I might put that back and wait for Smackdown because that’s Naomi flavour) and get the jaffa cakes… come on WWE give me some joke!

I am already experiencing problems with this stream, and with the mood I’m in, I might just switch it off, and put on that Cobra Kai thing on YouTube…  have you seen it yet? I’ve watched the first two episodes, and it’s already compelling! Good job Ralph Macchio!

Braun Strowman Vs Kevin Owens, winner goes through to Money Innah Bank… unlucky Kevin!!!

“THIS IS WHAT YOU DESERVE YOU COWARD!!!!”  Braun is f**k!n up Kevin Owens!

Check it – 4 superstars each from RAW & Smackdowns (Men & Women) will compete in the Money Innah Bank Ladder match… this is what I’m saying! STEP THEIR GAME UP! On the same token, this is on YOUR HEAD fans! You’re the ones like ‘cut down the PPVs’… so don’t come with your noise like ‘why is this guy not in it’??? SHUT THE F**K UP!

Happy Birthday Kevin Owens! Oh man! He really is getting birthday beatings!

HAHAHAHA!!!! The run around the ring and then box him down! PUT THAT MOVE IN WWE 2K19 PLEASE!!! What we do know… Braun is going to Money In The Bank… that’s worries for everybody!

The Big Dog is p!$$£d the f**k off!!! AND RIGHTFULLY SO! But what about Mr Lesnar? Aaaaaaah sheeeeeet he’s gonna beat the 434 streak for real!

Jinder thinks he should be in the Money In The Bank ladder match? He’s almost as insane as Kanye according to Jiggaman!

GRANT BODY-P!

Sasha Banks Vs Ember Moon Vs Ruby Riott… winner goes to Money In The Bank… Sasha girl you fine but backing Ember Moon here!!! OWWWWWWWW!!!

OH SH!T! Something went down in the crowd to make security escort them out the building! What the hell happened? Answers on a postcard please! Crowd was chanting YOU DESERVE IT! Don’t tell me someone was masturbating over Liv Morgan?

GRANT BODY-P!

The Riot Squad being teef with Sasha Banks! Bayley came down to help! But this enabled Ember Moon to hit the Eclipse on Ruby Riot – BLAOW!

Gotta love WWE right? Talking about Bobby Lashley’s career, and blatantly ignoring the

Renee ypung sexy ass

Photo courtesy of Edd Mulhall

TNA sh!t! Renee Young wants to know about Bobby Lashley the man… more like she secretly wants some BBC –

OH MY GOD!!! SOMETHING’S HAPPENING!!! YO YO YO!!!! STOP IT!!!

Check it – Jinder Mahal must defeat Chad Gable…if he wants to get into the Money In the bank… wait – the Coach just said Chad reminds him of a young Kurt Angle… Jason Jordan are you watching this???

Jinder Mahal got the Collass on Chad Gable – BLAOW!!! But Mahal wanted to buss up Chad Gable after that… oh dear…

After all that!!!! Kurt Angle gave Jinder a NAUGHT! What a b!tch!

Who would want to Walk With Elias when you can Strut Gloriously with Bobby Roode??

There’s my pick right there!!! Bobby Roode to win the Money Innah Bank! Imagine the storylines going forward! Braun is too obvious… he would cause the most ruckus….actually he would be a good choice as well!

Who wants to test Seth Rollins for the Intercontinental Championship? Oh no… Mojo Rawley? This fool? Yo Seth – send for the TANDEM ENGINE!

Gotta admit – Mojo Rawley is going IN against Seth Rollins! But he couldn’t withstand the curb stomp – BLAOW!

Look at Rollins swinging the belt like a helicopter like his name is Petey Pablo!

Fancy that… The Deleater Of Worlds facing ‘Daxel’… Brother must fight brother! (Wyatt Vs Bo Dallas) This should be good!

Oh it’s finished already? Sorry I was playing Street Fighter…

GRANT BODY-P!

Finn Balor Vs Sami Zayn Vs Roman Reigns! Winner goes to Money Innah Bank! Imagine if Reigns won… oh boy oh boy!

OH SNAP! WWE is in the UK next week! Aaaah sheeeeeet! Get restraining orders ready for the following women: Natalya, Nia Jax, Naomi, Charlotte & Becky… if the Infamous Informer is within 10 feet of those lovely young ladies – arrest him on the spot!

WWE SPICE GIRLS

Jinder Mahal baited it up for Reigns! He’s gonna pay for that I will assure you!

Finn Balor hits the Coup De Grace on Sami Zayn! Balor advances! Are you happy now muthaf***az? Balor is on a PPV! Now shut the f**k up!

GRANT BODY-P!

 

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Monday Night Raw #1301, April 30, 2018!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

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Imagine! I’m supposed to talk about how Titus O Neill became a Shame of a Nation at the Greatest Royal Rumble… but someone from the Smack Talk Centre decides to tag me in the picture above… NIAAAAA JAAAAAAXXXX! She’s just baaaaaaaad! Imagine her riding your tings! Whining those hips! I am so surprised Redman hasn’t shown up to a WWE event yet… imagine a storyline with Nia & Redman… it would be the best ever!

Redman approves

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RAW 1301! I haven’t done this blogging thing in a while, lets see if I still got it!

Jerry Lawler calls it Bizarro Land, I call it THE PROMISED LAND! The home of my real life woman (Hi Leanna!) RAW is in Canada, and they are booing the hell out of Roman Reigns!

Come on Canada – it’s not like he retired The Undertaker!!!!

Oh dear! Canada you might as well start cheering Reigns – you boo Samoa Joe and now you boo Jinder Mahal!

Jinder Mahal believes he can win the Universal Championship! Wait – Sami Zayn gets cheered!!!! Well that’s alright then! we didn’t wanna boo him anyway!

Oh no – they might boo Bobby Lashley – he prevented Zayn from going to the Greatest Royal Rumbles! They might chant ‘YOU SCREWED BRET’ er I mean ZAYN!

GRANT BODY-P!

And now they cheer Kevin Owens! Would this technically mean Danny Bryan would get booed??? Answers on a postcard please! Tweet me – @MZATheInfamous!

Well at least the crowd wanna see Roman Reigns fight! He gets butts in the seats!!!

Trust in Braun to clean house! He gets cheered – Can’t go wrong!

Oh no – Elias in concert? I didn’t pay to see him? I’m still hurt I didn’t get to see Killah Priest and Lords Of The Underground!!!

I gotta give Elias his props, I don’t think he was meant to get this over with the fans…

Oh no Bobby Roode f**ked up his throat! Elias announces himself as the winner… it would have been even better if Elias sent for the guitar and started singing about Roode’s throat! That would have been TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEF!!!

Wait a minute – two local French Canadian wannabe La Resistance fools wanna get buss arse by The Authors Of Pain?? They got entrance music too! WHOA! Did Barry Horowitz get that sh!t? Answers On A Postcard please!

Charly Caruso did ask the fools why…. they should have told her the truth – they wanna get a quick $3000!

GRANT BODY-P!

You know some fool at the Chiarshot  FB wrestling group asked – why Seth Rollins didn’t help join the six man tag match with Reigns & Lashley against Mahal & Sami & Kevin later? FOLLOW THE STORYLINE! WRESTLING IS STORYLINE! See that’s why fans don’t make any sense when they claim to book better than the official bookers! (Not saying that the WWE Bookers are perfect – they’re not) but fans are just that – FANS! KNOW YOUR ROLE!

I don’t think even Seth Rollins was prepared for this ovation! Anyone would think he was inducted in the Hall of Fame!

Ok enough of this French talk from the guys – let’s hear it from the women! (Not you Alexa you’re ugly)

GRANT BODY-P!

The crowd is crazy!!!! There’s probably some idiot sitting behind the computer screen like – ‘I want the attitude era’ back…

I can’t believe Curtis Axel & Bo Dallas wanted to form the 4 Horsemen with Balor and Seth! That’s disrespect to Flair! They must want Flair to take off his clothes in disgust!

ric-flair-strut-o

Oh yeah that goes for Ruby Riot – Do NOT SPEAK French!

But Sasha – you can speak French all day!!! OH YEAH!!!

backlash 2018

Even the boss lady was no match for the Riott Squad. She and Bayley (and maybe somebody else – Rousey maybe?) should stop being b!tches and combine their force!

Now I was gonna retire to my bed because I am mad tired – but yo – Titus is coming on! The star!!!!

But just before that – Alexa wants sympathy – she gets NONE FROM ME! As far as I’m concerned – she can GET THE F**K OUTTA HERE with her crocodile tears! And I hope she BURNS IN HELL!!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

“This is for everybody who had a ‘Nia’ in their life”… Well THE GRANT SAYS – if ‘Nia’ looks like that – I WANT HER IN MY LIFE! GOD DAYUUUUUUUM!

Titus admitted that he took the L! What a good sport!! He’s smiling too! As usual Baron Corbin is hating… watch this – Corbin gonna lose!

As for Woken Matt Hardy & Wyatt… YAAWWWWWWNNN look at the time! Past my bedtime! (Nothing to do with the RAW Tag Team Champions, I am actually genuinely tired.) Goodnight wrestling fans, don’t let the Double R bugs bite you in your basement @$$!

GRANT WWDJC2

Good morning True wrestling fans! Welcome back, and I hope you are still joining in at home. I wake up this morning praising the lord for another day, but also contemplating how to get that God Of War game… like I want the game but I have so much going on I don’t want to regret it financially. Anyway enough rambling on, let’s watch the rest of RAW! Where’s my coffee at?

Drew Wackintyre & Dolph Ziggler think every superstar should be afraid… I don’t know about you but when you have guys like Bray Wyatt, Matt Hardy, The Authors of Pain, Bobby Lashley & Braun around… this is the part where I become my favorite superhero as I say this:

blade2

I know everyone’s favourite hero is Thanos right now… sorry – Blade is STILL DA MAN!

OH NO!!!!! Titus clearly using his misfortune and turning it into a positive to f**k up Baron Corbin! No Way Jose caught Corbin with a distraction roll up! I know Shadfather & Icy Fresh loves those! I think Corey Graves is on to something… No Way Jose joining Titus Worldslide??? I could slide to that!!!

I so cannot wait to see Alexa Blitch get BUSS ARSE by Nia Jax again! Alexa got life though this week because if Ronda Rousey ketch haar Alexa would be in a box! And we don’t want that now do we lads? It would be a sad day for you while I be Thanos laughing in your face!

GRANT BODY-P!

Great wrestling contest between Seth Rollins and Finn Balor – well do we expect anything less? Reversals galore, near falls, beautiful! Unlucky Balor – But you don’t have a match at Backlash though… er uh-oh! Therin lies WWE’s problem! So much talent its unreal.

A team with Double R, Lashley and Braun… there’s no way Sami Jinder and Kevin can beat them surely???

OH NO NOT AGAIN! Every time Sami & Kevin find their feet on the outside, Braun knocks them down again! But this move in WWE2K19 PLEASE!!!!! Make it a OMG! Moment! Because that sh!t is too funny!

Now…it’s gonna hurt me, but if I want God of War, Burnout Paradise will have to leave the building temporarily. Just like business, you have to make tough decisions. John and Nikki know all about tough decisions…

GRANT BODY-P!

STC 2018 logo3

Monday Night Raw #1294, March 12, 2018!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

I wanna take this time to big up the newest Facebook wrestling group I am in: The CHAIRSHOT. They are supporting me and the BDSIR NETWORK. I sincerely hope they appreciate the style of blogs I do – This ain’t your usual review blog. I give my thoughts from a Jamaican man’s point of view (which means I don’t take this wrestling sh!t seriously, I use a lot of Hip Hop references, and my aim is to make you laugh. I was born in England of Jamaican descent.) Don’t expect me to talk technicalities in wrestling!

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1294! JUST LIKE D12, IT’S FIGHT MUSIC!!!

Ok, I got 2 Chicago pizzas in the oven, a Miranda orange drink, and that marvellous Jamaica ginger cake for later… I got a feeling RAW is gonna be a good one!

Right – I’ve missed the first 20 minutes of this sh!t because of the wack streams. I heard Roman Reigns voice but that’s about it… I bet that doesn’t bother the haters!

Sonya Deville fine @$$ fighting Sasha Banks sexy @$$… I won’t put my pizzas on yet…

Now this Kid Rock guy… I heard he’s not down with the brothers… if that is true then THE GRANT SAYS F**k you Kid Rock! However, he did one thing that I can respect – that is – provide that American Bad Ass tune for The Undertaker when he returned in 2000. All that Judgment Day is now business? It was such a feel good moment after Triple Teef and his crew were beating down The Rock every week…

ARE YOU SCARED? HE’S HERE! HIS JUDGMENT DAY IS NOW!!! THAT IS SOME GOOSEBUMP SH!T! THE MCMAHON HELMSLEY FACTION GOT F**KED UP! AAAH GOOD TIMES!

I am so f**ked off with this stream – I gotta catch up on YouTube in the morning.

…and so I wake up and find that rapper Craig Mack has passed away…muthaf***a!

Can we get a 10 bell salute to Craig Mack?

We gotta keep it moving y’all, so I’m on the YouTube… and I click on the Sonya Deville Vs Sasha Banks match, and straight away there is a warning about its content… er… does one of them lose their top or something? Do we accidentally see Sasha’s pum-pum when her leg is hooked for the three??

LET’S GO IN!!!

All I saw was Bayley helping Sasha win her match against Sonya because Absolution was gonna teef, then after the match they rushed Sasha, by which time Bayley already left the building! The plot thickens!

I didn’t see anything offensive… DID YOU?

YES! The Fabulous Moolah Battle Royal! It’s funny how we were talking about this on the JAMMS Podcast and what Fabulous Moolah has done, good and bad,  hey none of us are perfect… my early pick to win? CARMELLA. F-A-B-U-L-O-U-S… get it? Nah? ok let;s keep it moving…

The Miz trying to work brain as usual to turn Seth Rollins and Finn Balor against each other… I’m just waiting for both of them to get up and kick down The Miz in his mouth corner!

Seth told him to shut up on his own show! Can he do that?

Uh-oh! Seth & Finn look like they are gonna go at it! Look at The Miz’s face! He’s loving this!!! I’ve never seen him look so happy ever since he put it in Maryse!

GRANT BODY-P!

OH NO THEY CLOCKED HIM! SMILE GONE!!!!

Miz tried to run but he got ketch! Finn Balor box him down! But forgotten for a split second Seth Rollins is still there!

So Seth is all about Burning It Down and flames on his attire. Do you think my hero Kane taught him how to set things on fire by just using his hands?

So Alexa Blitch believes that Asuka chose Charlotte because she knew she would ‘lose’ her? CALLING MY NXT EXPERTS! Did Asuka & Alexa clash back at Full Sail University??? Answers on a postcard please! TWEET ME @MZATheInfamous!

I don’t like how this Alexa Blitch is talking to Asuka!

WRESTLING FANS ALLOW ME TO DEMONSTRATE – EXHIBIT A! we don’t need to go to NXT! Go back to Jan 1, 2018!!!!

Technically Asuka is eligible for a title shot against Alexa! Asuka could make history, beat Alexa, go to Smackdowns, beat Charlotte at WrestleMania and hold two titles at once! But of course WWE is not gonna clock on to that sh!t!

“To be the woman, you gotta BEAT THE WOMAN”!

Translation… Alexa is NO WOMAN. She is just a LITTLE B!TCH! And Charlotte is ALL WOMAN let me tell ya!

GRANT BODY-P!

Asuka speaks the truth! “I beat you before! I beat you AGAIN!” There’s the evidence up there!

If I was Asuka I’d just kick down Alexa word up!

Mickie James went in against Asuka, but she missed the Mick Kick – got caught with the Asuka Lock – TAP OUT!!! Mickie was crying for Alexa as if Alexa was her moms!!!

Alexa Bliss bex! So what does she do? disrespect Nia Jax… and WWE go and feed some funny looking out of shape jobber to get killed!

OH NO! Someone is on that GTV sh!t! Alexa and Mickie running down Nia! DISRESPECT!

Next week Asuka faces Alexa! But watch this – either that match is not gonna happen, or Nia is gonna jump in and Alexa gonna get F**KED UP!!! If I was Alexa b!tch @$$ I wouldn’t attempt to come to work next week!

Tag Team Battle Royal winner fights The Bar at the WrestleMania!

Wait a minute! BRAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!! He can’t enter this? (Then again maybe he can – he has the strength of 10 men and a tag team consists of 2…saying that Braun is a ONE MAN FACTION!!!)

It cracks me up every single time when Braun runs after his opponent! It’s the scariest run ever since the T-1000!

t-1000-running-o

If they cast Braun as the next Terminator – I’m sorry – Arnie would have NO CHANCE! John Connor would be FINISHED! And Alexa Bliss would play as Sarah Connor!

GRANT BODY-P!

Oh sheeeeeeeeeeet! Braun just blatantly told Anderson – “I’M GOING TO WRESTLEMANIA!” and dashed him out the ring! He’s the #1 contender for the championship! LET THE COMPLAINING ON THE INTERNET BEGIN! Oh wait… you guys like Braun though!!!

WHOA! NEXT WEEK we are gonna see the Ultimate Deletion! NOT WrestleMania! Sounds good to me! Y’all loved the Final Deletion on TNA – I checked it out myself recently… you guys were right – it was so awful that it was entertaining. So don’t complain on the internet saying it’s wack – I EXPECT IT TO BE WACK!

“You have a beautiful family… it would be a shame if something happened to them…” OH MY GOD!!! Wyatt wants to kill little Maxel! he wants to put it n that Reby Sky or whatever her name is! (Yo she is KRISS!!!!) Let’s throw up a picture of her for NO REASON!

Reby Sky

Ok as you have noticed this sh!t is in a different order… let’s get into the nitty-gritty!

Brock is not in the building!!!! UH-OH!!!! LET THE COMPLAINING ON THE INTERNET BEGIN! The WWE Universal Champion must in stitches with Sable!

Double R speaks the truth! If you don’t show up to work? You get FIRED! Back to the Jobcentre! Watching Jeremy Kyle on a weekday followed by Supermarket Sweep!

GRANT BODY-P!

Uh-Oh Roman Reigns is calling out Vincent Kennedy! Aaah sheeeeet it’s gonna be pandemonium on the internet!

Good lord! The cameras followed Double R through the gorilla position to the backstage where Vincent Kennedy & Shane are! Shane can’t be there??? This is not Smackdowns?

“GO TO THE COMMERCIAL!!!!”

Big BIG WrestleMania 34

Clearly this scene with sexy @$$ Renee Young outside Vincent Kennedy’s office and Roman storming out while Vince ‘seemingly fixing his suit’ is ammunition for the internet who believe Vince & Roman have sexual relations… oh man how awkward is this… Yo WWE – you’re not doing any favors here!

With that said – this is straight WrestleMania quality building! Vince guarantees Brock will be here next week! Here’s the twist! Double R is suspended for a hot minute!

Translation – They are keeping Brock and Roman away from each other until the go home show when they can get their ruckus on! DO THE KNOWLEDGE JABRONIES!

Finally Jonathan Cena… I’m sorry to say this Nikki – you are DEFINETLEY NOT GET MARRIED… you gonna be a widow… you gonna be like Hilary Banks from The Fresh Prince of Bel Air… Cena might as well do a bungee jump and his head hit the concrete floor. The way he talked about The Undertaker… NO ONE HAS GONE THERE. Not the Rock, Not CM Punk, Not even Stone Cold Steve Austin… even when Shawn Michaels kicked the 16-1 headstone, this was nothing compared to Cena’s Grown Thuganomics…

 

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Monday Night Raw #1293, March 5, 2018!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

I hope you die-hard wrestling fans hate me, that’s ok, because I hate you right back!

This is what I don’t understand, you see 30 second squash matches on RAW every other week, hell – Sheamus defeated Danny Bryan in 18 seconds at WrestleMania 28 for crying out loud. And yet, you muthaf***az are complaining on the internet over something that happened at a HOUSE SHOW, which you never witnessed live (unless you were in the building of course) you never PAID FOR IT, and above all else, you UK FANS were SNOWED IN! You weren’t moving anywhere! With that said…

SEAN PRICE - STFU

Oh wait, I do understand… it was in Chicago, the place where they worship some guy who doesn’t give a f**k about them…

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1293! What’s this I hear about a 50-man Royal Rumble????? Saudi Arabia be making major moves star!

Greatest Royal Rumble

I got cookies, a cup of soup, and a Jamaica Ginger Cake with custard for later! LET’S DO THIS SH!T KURK!

KURT IS CALLING TRIPLE TEEF OUT! HE’S BACKED OFF HIS JACKET TOO!

Wait a minute – Kurt stripping off clothes and Stephanie comes out here? We know you want Kurt to f**k you one more time!

GRANT BODY-P!

Listen to Stephanie wukkin brain! Know Your Role Kurt! Make matches Kurt! Use your head Kurt!

Ronda Rousey is all smiles! She must have had sex earlier!

GRANT THAT IS ENOUGH!

Hold on – Ronda said her debut match at WrestleMania -she can choose anyone she wanted! Er… Stephanie??

Wait a minute – I thought Triple wasn’t here yet!

Oh no! Turns out Stephanie has a second contract as a WWE Superstar! Same with Triple H! Kurt is doing his job – he’s making the matches!!!

There it is! Triple & Stephanie Vs Kurt & Ronda Rousey at the big BIG WrestleMania! (yes we already knew that because we read the dirt sheets) But the way they dropped it – I was marking the f**k out! Kurt got Triple in the ankle lock, Stephanie tried to teef but Rousey caught her with the Samoan Drop! HOLY SMOKES!

F**k that – I’m ready for the Big BIG WrestleMania! JUST LIKE THAT!

Now Asuka is here! GOD DAYUUUUUM SHE FINE!

Mike Cole promoting Ninja Warrior? PAY MAKOTO NAGANO HIS MONEY!

Makoo Nagano

Oh lawd Nia Jax is killing Asuka! SHE WANTS TO KILL!!!! But Asuka got the Triangle chokehold! She won’t let go! It’s locked in for the longest! Nia tried to fight out but Asuka transitioned into an arm bar!!!! SHE’S GONNA BREAK THE ARM! Nia had to tap out! If I was Asuka – I would run for the hills! Alexa Bliss looks like urine gonna leave her vagina and go down her leg!

GRANT BODY-P!

You gotta be kidding me! The almighty Nia Jax CRYING? What is this?!!!! Where are you Shadfather – console this woman!

Shout out to the cute girl who works at Iceland ‘Natalie’ I think her name is – can’t remember – I did my shopping today, I saw the 3 for £2 offer on the cookies, now normally the cashier is like ‘Do you have an Iceland Card?’ Or ‘would you like a bag?’ Not this chick… I know it’s all about service with a smile but she’s like ‘enjoy your cookies!’ Aaah bless her… if I was single…

GRANT BODY-P!

I honestly thought The Revival would be next in line for the titles and go to big BIG WrestleMania… wow.. you NXT guys are allowed to complain on the internet…

I know John Cena is a free agent… but I think he’s taking the p!$$ coming on RAW to explain his WrestleMania plans… you’re fighting on Smackdown homie!

Yes crowd – boo this man! He doesn’t need to be on RAW!!!!

Ok he suggests I listen…

Uh-oh – he’s out to break Ric Flair’s title reigns… I don’t think Ric Flair cares… you saw him in that 21 Savage video!

John Cena wants that Triple Threat match! He wants to Shatter the dreams of die-hard wrestling fans who want AJ Styles Vs Strong Style!

Talking of Shattered Dreams… I don’t understand why Goldust  is out here! Very random…

John Cena looks as confused as us! So confused that he went down after Goldust boxed him!

Careful John – Goldust might have Victoria Secret underneath that outfit!

GRANT BODY-P!

Why did Goldust even bother… he was so much more entertaining when he had the hots for Rowdy Roddy Piper…

Elias speaks the truth! Music brings us together, not tear us apart!

Elias vs Braun in a Symphony of Destruction match! Well as long as RZA’s 36 Chambers studios are not involved… that goes for 9th Wonder’s Jamla studios…

Congratulations to Hillbilly Jim hitting the Hall of fame… he doesn’t mean a damn thing to me but there you go…

Corey Graves just called Mandy Rose – God’s Greatest Creation… There is no doubt – Mandy Rose is hot…but I believe God created something even greater…

tiffany haddish

Meet Tiffany Haddish guys… star of the film ‘Girl Trip’ – she is sexy as f**k and she is funny as hell. LOOK AT THAT… OWWWWWWWWWWW!!!

What’s wrong with you Bayley? Sasha saved your clart! You refuse her hug? Oh well come hug me Sasha god dayuuuuum!!!

Big BIG WrestleMania 34

Elias can play every instrument! If hat is so, why hasn’t Ghostface Killah approached Elias for beats?!!!

Elias tried to get away in the car! But the car wouldn’t move!!!

I’M NOT FINISHED WITH YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Guys I just got an important message on Facebook… it’s the President of The Wu Worldwide DJ Coalition. I gotta take this call…

Holy smokes! Elias is probably DEAD BY NOW! Braun lick him down with the cello, then he dropped the piano on him! OH SHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

BRAUN CHISELED YOUR TOMBSTONE! SLEEP WELL!!!!

If you are a gamer, you haven’t lived until you have played Fatal Fury 2… I mean, the last boss fights you in front of a live orchestra… that’s f**ked up!

Now Bray Wyatt just beat Rhyno in roughly 30 seconds… go on – COMPLAIN ON THE INTERNET NOW!!!!

Bray Wyatt just mentioned ‘Final Deletion’!

The Hardy Compound??? WHOA! ULTIMATE DELETION!!! I knew it had to go that route! YES!!!

“GET OUT? Get Out is what Kurt Angle should do with Monday Night Raw…” Miz is outta order for that!

He says Kurt is sucking up to Ronda Rousey… I don’t know about you but I would ‘suck’ up to Ronda Rousey…

GRANT BODY-P!

I like that idea! The Miztourage Vs Seth Rollins & Finn Balor? LET’S GO! I wanna see the Miz get BUSS ARSE AGAIN after talking sh!t!

THERE IT IS! TRIPLE THREAT MATCH! Miz Vs Seth Rollins Vs Finn Balor at the big BIG WrestleMania… see I’m supposed to get excited but again – you guys read the dirt sheets and spoiled everything!

Paul Heyman is here with the WWE Universal Championship in his hands!

Wait a minute – he says Brock Lesnar will soon hold BOTH the Universal Title AND the UFC Heavyweight Title? He can’t do that surely?!

Paul Heyman just called the Universal Title ‘Brock’s B!tch?’ Does that mean Brock is cheating on Sable???

Heyman says Double R cannot shoot from the hip against him or Brock! He’s likely to be right!! But Double R is here anyway!

Told Heyman straight – that next week in Detroit, just like D12… it’s FIGHT MUSIC!!!

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Monday Night Raw #1291, February 19, 2018!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

WE want the brand extension!

WE want fewer pay per views!

WE want Cesaro to be champion!

Combined WWE PPV

Too bad you can’t have it all eh?

GRANT BODY-P!

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REQUEST TO JOIN – DON’T BE A POTATO! DON’T BE A TRAGEDY like…Dana Brooke. Come on Kurt – don’t be sexist – put the big t!tty gyal in the chamber! (Nah that ain’t politically correct… forget it…)

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RAW 1291! Chamber Music, F**k!n the party up!

I don’t know about you but this Hardy Vs Wyatt thing – it needs a little extra something… yes they have clashed, yes they have both chatted sh!t… it needs to go to that next level for me to be re-invested… whatever Matt was doing in the TNA joint – bring that sh!t here and make it 10x better!

“What is so special about Ronda Rousey is – she’s an attraction…” In more ways than one eh Charlotte?!!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

Aaah sheeeeeeet they showing footage of Ronda practicing her wrestling moves! UH-OH!!! This ain’t no Eva Marie folks!

Black Panther fever hits Titus Worldwide! Even Dana Brooke is doing it – (not properly she got a clipboard in her hand) But if they lose to the Bar, they will bring disgrace to Wakanda!!!

Titus Panther

YES!!!! WAKANDA FOREVER!!!! Apollo Crews was like – I AM T’CHALLA! SON OF T’CHAKA!!! Dana Brooke must have gave them some of that Vagin—- er I mean Vibranium! (still doesn’t sound right does it?)

Come on Nia you’re dealing with Asuka here! Asuka knows the way of the ninja and stealth attacks – YOU DON’T!

Mike Cole is talking about ‘friends’ and alliances that may occur in the Chamber… it’s still every woman for herself Cole! And it looks like Dana Brooke could well be dissed for real! I would say to Dana – walk out the joint – but maybe… she and Titus Worldwide should try Smackdown first before doing that…

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HOLY SMOKES!!! Seth Rollins has done a ‘Chris Jericho’! By that I mean he beat the two top guys in the same night! In this case Double R & John Cena! Oh man! The IWC must be reaching fever pitch!!!

What a performance by Seth Rollins! Dude has lasted over an hour in the gauntlet match thus far! But there was no way he could outlast three guys, with two of them being Double R & Cena… Elias COME CROSS!

Next opponent – Finn Balor… and true say Elias was still mash up with his ribs, one coup de grace on them and it’s curtains for the man with the guitar!

Typical Miz has to be so dyam teef! Double R, Seth, Elias, and Balor use real skills – Not the Miz… he has to brfing his pu$$yclaat friends with him and attack Balor from behind…

…but if I was Balor, I’d let The Miz beat me and let me see the lights for the three because the winner has to fight…….BRAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!!!

“If you excuse me Charly, I have some unfinished business to attend to…” The Miztourage heard Braun say that and they was like – OH SH!T! we gotta leave the ring NOW!!!

Miz tried to get away, but Braun ketch him!!! The Grant Says – If Braun was in the police force, there is NO WAY you are out running him!

Running powerslam into the canvas – BLAOW!!!!

Chamber music, f**k!n the party up! That’s what Braun does!!!

 

 

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DISCLAIMER: ALL OPINIONS EXPRESSED BY THE INFAMOUS INFORMER DO NOT NECESSARILY REPRESENT OR REFLECT THE VIEWS OF THE WWE OR/AND THE SMACK TALK CENTRE.