Tag Archives: Wyatt

Monday Night Raw #1268 , September 18, 2017!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

Aah man, how do I say goodbye…

We lost another wrestling legend y’all… Bobby The Brain Heenan has returned to the essence and reunited with his broadcast partner – Gorilla Monsoon. Now the HWF (Heaven Wrestling Federation) roster is finally complete. They have their champions, (Warrior, Savage, Eddie) Their mid-carders (Perfect, Rick Rude, Owen Hart) Their women’s division (Chyna, Elizabeth) Their monster heels (Umaga, Viscera) Their babyface (Dusty) their top heel (Piper) Even their jobbers (Test, Crash Holly, Junkyard Dog) and everyone in between (Bulldog, Boss Man) And GOD himself is the general manager/commissioner – he’s signing these stars!

GRANT BODY-P!

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RAW 1268! Shout out to Natalie Sawyer… damn that girl is so fine! If I had my hands on her – I’d show NO MERCY on her p-(FLATLINE!!!!)

Steph Raw

I got NO refreshments… oh lawwwwwd… this is bad news! How am I gonna make it through the show?

Yo this week’s WWF wrestling better be as hot as the feud between Grace & Sienna on Hollyoaks!

GRANT BODY-P!

Ok I missed the first few minutes so I don’t know if there was a 10 Bell salute… what I do know… is that The Miz suddenly thinks he’s father of the year just because he breed up Maryse… and tries to talk down at Kurt Angle… you think Jason Jordan can defeat the Miz for the intercontinental championship at the No Mercy joint? F**k all that – Alexa Blitch is on against all curves and no brakes – a woman Redman would be proud of in Nia Jax… with that said… I had to throw some chips on… a brotha hungry!

..and just like that… I’m already fed up – the streams are f**k!n up, reminding me not to be a cheap arse and watch Raw properly on Sky Sports… well THE GRANT SAYS – I’m gonna eat my chips… and when I’m dun, me garne ah mi bed! I know it’s the go home show leading to the PPV… but my patience worn thin. This would not happen if it was Smackdown let me tell ya!

TUESDAY MORNING

Yes jabronies I am blessed to see another day, now I’m on catch up mode with this wrestling sh!t… and what do I see? Alexa Bl!tch running away from Nia Jax… that’s your World Wrestling Federation Women’s champion, your sweetheart… f**kouttahere! No I didn’t roll out the wrong side of the bed… this is Grant every day! Who you know like Grant????

Sasha comes out to tell Alexa – get your B!TCH @$$ back in the ring! Nia Jax claps down Alexa from the other side – BLAOW!

Shout out to the Soul n Sports massive & crew – before Raw I agreed that it is now Nia’s time to become the champion… but after watching her dominant performance… er… knowing WWE’s logic… er… oh dear…

Er… BAYLEY???? She looks bex for once!!!! She actually looks like she wants to f**k Nia up! WHOA!

Well obviously it would take the combined might of Alexa, Sasha & Bayley to mash her up when all they did was shoulder block Nia into the canvas…

Where does Alexa think she’s going trying to fren up – fren up Bayley & Sasha? They gave her the Ol Dirty Bastard look – GETTOUTTAHERE!!!

ODB GETTOUTTAHERE

“Nostalgia will fade just like these WHAT chants…” Sorry Cesaro the What chant will live forever… it cannot be stopped! It will only get stronger!

I gotta agree with Ambrose – Ii wouldn’t let my brothers dressed like battyman wannabe T-800s!

GRANT BODY-P!

I like The Shield’s formation suicide dives! That’s cool!!!! The Bar or The Club was not ready for that sh!t!

The Club lose again… oh god damnit this is the match we should have at No Mercy… what the blodclaaat! The Club should have won that sh!t to make things interesting… but nooooooo….

114 match losing streak??? If Apollo Crews loses to Curt Hawkins… then I will review my Raw card… but that sexy @$$ Asuka is coming though… she might be the saving grace…

Spinning spin out powerbomb – BLAOW! Now Hawkins is 0-115!

Wait a second – did Double R cuss bad words?!!!! How can you fools not like this guy? Oh yeah I forgot – you are all BUZZARDS with iPhoneXs lighting that sh!t up when a blubbering idiot walks to the ring with his flashlight!

GRANT BODY-P!

Double R bring up old sh!t about Cena running down The Rock… Aaah good times hahaa!

no_mercy_rendered-5805b3c8abc10195cce3ec0ebfb18b02

See that’s the only time Double R can get one up on Cena – when Cena is not here… five years later Cena is doing the same sh!t The Rock is doing… y’all know me – I’m Team Bring It all day… but Double R said something that made me think – maybe he shot himself in the foot – Cena believed he would beat The Rock at WrestleMania 28 – that went wrong… Double R cuts a similar promo like Cena did 5 five years ago – I have a feeling Cena gonna beat Double R and that’s gonna bring doubt and bad vibes in Double R’s Psyche… YES – that’s how it’s going – Cena wins… it eats away at Double R and consumes him until they have their rematch! That’s my prediction right there!

Massive big ups to Bobby The Brain Heenan. I will keep it 100 like I always do – Jim Ross & Jerry Lawler will always be my favourite commentary team of all time… but Gorilla Monsoon and Bobby Heenan were the original commentary team, not just that – you look at all the sketches they did back in the day – you don’t get that sh!t now word up. You won’t hear me say ‘he’s the greatest that ever did it’ unless I am a true fan – Ok I put it to you… in all the times you have read my blogs or listened to my podcasts on BDSIR Network – when have you heard me hold Heenan in high regard? Outside of the Royal Rumble 92 special show me and Shad did? Just keeping it 100…

Dustin Rhodes? So he’s now the artist formerly known as Goldust again? Oh no that became a horror story last time that happened!

Don’t worry I get it – it’s playing off the storyline Wyatt got with Finn Balor – I already did the knowledge!

Yo Rhodes is going IN on Wyatt! ‘Next Undertaker my dutty foot!’

…then he went in – right into a Sister Abigail – BLAOW! Er.. oh dear…

Finn Balor now on that cryptic sh!t! Oh Bray, you wonder why I refuse to light up my phone when you come out to the ring…

GRANT BODY-P!

So this six-pack challenge thing – Elias Vs Double J vs Hardy Boyz Vs Miztourage  winner fights the Miz at No Mercy? YAWN…. NEXT!!!

The Miz is so TEEEEEF! He doesn’t want Jeff Hardy or Jason Jordan to win! They need to kick him down and get him out of the equation!

OHHHH The Miz has done it now! He just called Jason Jordan a ‘Jon Snow’! he can’t do that! Oh boy – backing Double J all the way here… but that Miz is SO TEEF!!! Calling it now – Double J wins by disqualification, Jason Jordan gets bex, the Miztourage beats on him… then finally Kurt comes out, and hits the olympic slam on the Miz… either that or tries to break the ankle…

WHAAAAAAHAHAHA!!!! “I will feel great after I beat Neville at No Mercy how you doin?”
Did you see Enzo’s face when he heard – BRAUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!!! Braun just boxed him down one time – BLAOW!!!GRANT WU TANG FOREVER

Braun picked up Enzo one hand – CHOKESLAAAAAAM! BLAOW! I don’t think Enzo gonna make it to No Mercy now! Neville must be deddin!

The running powerslam!!! BRAUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!!!! Holy smokes! Enzo is probably dead by now!

There was NO NEED for that Red Arrow super move Neville!!! Oh my days that was funny!

Let’s keep on this Braun sh!t! He says he’s gonna take Suplex City and stomp it to the ground! Better listen to him Heyman… or ELSE!

Oh man – if I was the referee – I would let Brock & Braun go at it – a simple wrestling match just won’t do boys and girls!

Paul Heyman is straight exposing Mike Cole as the wack journalist that he is! Mike Cole you wack homes!

Brock is thanking Braun for coming at him like this! Remember boys and girls – don’t complain on the internet!

 

 

JAMMS

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Monday Night Raw #1258, July 3 , 2017!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

So the Slammiversary popped off! and NEW! Unified TNA Champion (or whatever it’s called) ALBERTO EL PATRON! There he is running down the WWE in the middle of the ring… after all they did for you Bertie, if it wasn’t for them, you wouldn’t be f**k!n Paige. Ungrateful sh!t!

GRANT BODY-P!

Unlucky Cody Rhodes, you didn’t quite make history by holding both the ROH & IWGP titles… Good thing you didn’t, because my fellow JAMMS host and STC member Aydenn Wardle would have lost his sh!t and would have blew his load faster than Chicago bussin into Iesha in Poetic Justice.

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RAW 1258! We don’t sing Great Balls Of Fire over here?!!!! We sing FYYYREEE!! from Busta Rhymes!!!

Steph Raw

Right – I got half a pack of lockets, a hot drink of lemon and honey, plus a pack of jaffa cakes. Yes your Infamous Informer is not very well, and he doesn’t have Penny to sing him soft kitty… however this is Monday Night Raw, we ain’t tryna sleep!

Oh dear, my stream is f**k!n up! Maybe I’m not supposed to watch the World Wrestling Federation Live! I juts missed 15 minutes of this sh!t…

By the sounds of it, I missed Enzo talk sh!t in the ring for that long, and then ambush Big Cass from behind. Ah well!!! Onto Sasha sexy @$$ and Bayley potato @$$!

I know you’re the boss lady, but even you cannot contend with Alexa Blitch and the Bottom and the Breasts Nia Jax!

“This is MY division Sasha!” OH HELL NO! I changed my mind – Sasha – BEAT THAT B!TCH @$$! YES! A BANK STATEMENT! ALEXA BLITCH TAPPING OUT! BEEEEAAAATCH!!!!!

An exclusive interview with Brock and Joe? On the go home show before the PPV? You cannot be serious right now! THAT AIN’T HAPPENING!

Is this thing with Naom Dar/Cedric Alexander/Alicia Fox sh!t still going on??? I only expect this from Hollyoaks! Oh yeah – it’s a ‘male soap opera isn’t it??? Aww shucks…

Sheeeeeeet! Heath Slater been in the WWE game for 8 years! And he never won a title? Last time I check – he won the tag titles with Rhyno! Oh he means a singles title…

Miz says there will be no title matches… YES! KURK ANGLE will have something to say about that!

SERIOUSLY! Miz talking to Kurt Angle like that? This dude got no manners!!!! Heath Slater can fight Miz for the title NOW! If Miz holds down the title (which I think he will because he’s a b!tch hiding behind Curtis Axel & Bo Dallas) then he got Dean Ambrose to deal with at the Great Balls Of Fire joint!

The question remains – who thought up that PPV Title and who got that sh!t approved? Was it one of Vincent Kennedy’s favourite tunes of all time? If that was the case I wanna have my own wrestling promotion! I would call my PPVs ‘Da Mystery Of Chessboxing’… ‘House Of Flying Daggers’, ‘Assassination Day’, ‘Winter Warz’, ‘Bring The Pain’, ‘Brooklyn Zoo’, ‘4th Chamber’… should I go on????

GRANT BODY-P!

Come on Slater!!! WHUPP HIS @$$!!! THINK OF THE KIDS!!!! THE KIDDDDDSSSSS!!! YOU GOTTA PAY THAT CHILD SUPPORT MUTHAF***A!

Damnit! His blodclart Miztourage! Miz has always been a b!tch!

Did you hear that? John Cena advertising Tapout Body Sprays? Talking about feeding trolls and stopping internet warriors?? Here’s looking at you retarded 434 fools!

OH Sh!t – Titus may have a slogan for Apollo Crews – Crews Can’t Loose! But we talking BRAUN here! And Apollo just had a daughter! Apollo must protect her from monsters! They are everywhere! And above all else – keep her OFF THE POLE!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

Great Balls Of fire

A 30- minute iron man tag team match between Sheamus/Cesaro & the Hardy Boyz at the Great Balls of Fire joint? WHOA! Sounds like WWE have been watching the Slammiversary and That G1 thing lately and got their study on!

Don’t you think that’s f**ked up people? Big Big Great Balls of Fire joint about to pop off and Finn Balor is not even fixed up in a match? But Raw made sure wrestling purists got their jerk on as he battles Cesaro here!

Wait a second, maybe he IS in a match at the PPV! I forgot about this Elias Samson dude… is that a bad thing?!

YES Wrestling fools don’t have a heart attack – Brock Lesnar IS SPEAKING TO SAMOA JOE! He is the best of the best of the best! You think Paul Heyman gonna say something stupid?

Hey Brock is laughing at this whole thing! He hasn’t gotta look for Joe! Joe gotta look for him!

Joe is on some – LET’S GO CHAMP! I like this! Considering it’s the go home show!

Joe is bex!!! Brock isn’t! You would think it’s the other way around! This is great!

Just when I thought Braun was getting better competition in Apollo Crews! For a minute Crews was killing Strowman! But Strowman hit the running powerslam, 1, 2 and – WAIT! He picked Crews head up! UH-OH!!!! DOUBLE R GET DOWN HERE FAST! THIS IS INJUSTICE!grant-body-p

He just dropped a second running powerslam! took his head off the canvas before the 3 and licked his forehead! OH MY GOD That’s some Wyatt sh!t right there!

After 3 Running Powerslams, it’s over… hey Crews… it could have been worse you feel me?

He just dashed Crews in the ambulance and told the driver to get going! But the driver nah move!

It’s DOUBLE R!!!! DUNA! DUNA! DUNA! DUNN-DUNN! How can you guys NOT LIKE this dude? YOU ARE THE PROBLEM!

UUUUUUOOOOOOOOAHHHHH! Spear Strowman off the stage into tables – BLAOW!!!!! But how is he gonna drag that carcass into the ambulance? That’s what I wanna know!

Strowman still on his feet! BLODCLART!

Yo, I watched Wonder Woman recently. That Gal Gadot though! OWWWWWWWWWWWW!!! Some lucky muthaf****a married her quicktime! She is FLIRT ON SIGHT I’m telling you! Watch STC’s Edd Mulhall… he’s on the case… he knows where all the naked pics is at! Personally, I don’t think Gal Gadot got any naked pics… I think Edd uses photoshop and is very efficient at it!

GRANT BODY-P!

Wonder Woman

 

JAMMS

Monday Night Raw #1189, March 7, 2016!!!

Smack Talk Centre-Raw!!

Peace intelligent wrestling fans and peace to retarded wrestling fools around the world! Thank you for your patience with me bringing this blog to you. I really shouldn’t be writing this because I have an essay to complete and my laptop charger died on me but thanks to STC’s Lee Ashbourne he hooked me up. Something he didn’t have to do but he did why? Because he respects my conglomerate. For that I respect him for it. SALUTE.

Now I missed RAW this week, I heard some of you were anticipating a big return, some of you went as far as thinking it’s CM Princess Peach B!tch just because it’s in Chicago… you guys are OFFICIALLY the epitome of what the negative side of the Internet Wrestling Community is. Yes ANYTHING can happen in the World Wrestling Federation and Shane McMahon proved that 2 weeks ago… but I the Infamous Informer stand here as a PROUD Anti-Punk fan. I don’t worship somebody who doesn’t give a crap about me as a fan or the wrestling business. Take a good look at yourself CM P**k worshippers. YOU ARE RETARDED.

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RAW #1189! I’m surprised WWE didn’t draw up this tune for their WWE Network show this weekend!

WWF PROPA TINGZSource: WWE.Com/YouTube

WHOA!!!! Shane telling it like it is! That’s what the IWC have been saying for months now! Vince is out of touch! The talented wrestlers don’t get props while the stars with no skills get pushed to the moon! Shane is out to end it! Or is he saying that just to make the internet fans happy? Keep it real with yourself – sometimes you say sh!t that your partner wants to hear right?

GRANT BODY-P!

AAAAH SH!T! When you hear the gong and the lights go out… THAT’S IT SHANE YOU’VE DUN IT NOW!

NO!!! VINCENT KENNEDY TRICKED US!!! Why he do this!!!!

Look at Shane – he’s dying to laugh here!!!

Oh no! Shane written OUT of Vincent Kennedy’s will! Stephanie gets everything! Oh well wrestling fans, we get NOTHING!

Awwww look at the pic of Vincent Kennedy and Shane when they were young! I’d like to add IWC idiots, that Vince used the word – WRESTLING in his promo… so with that – shut the f**k up!

OH MY DAYS! Vincent Kennedy took the photo and destroyed it! He can’t do that! This is Wrestlemania X-Seven all over again! He’s never gonna forgive Linda for giving birth to him!

“It’s so ironic that my greatest creation, is gonna put to rest, my greatest failure…”

WHOA! Worse than the XFL Vince????

Look at Shane go! Fighting off 4 security guards with the kung fu he’s been learning lately! GET DEM Ip Shane!

Shout out to Roy Lucier and the International Wrestling Fanbase – apparently Neville used a move that the late Hayabusa used in memory of his recent passing. Big those guys up – I would not have known that.

Owens was about gonna end Neville when suddenly! Sami Zayn comes through! Remember Owens nearly brukk his back and took him out the game!

He’s the guy who came back!!!! And you guys wanted CM Princess Peach B!tch… you still marked out though right?! YOU DYAM ARSE!

Wait a minute… has Lana got the freedom to wear what she wants now? She dressing more like that Ziggler kid than what Rusev likes with the tight blouse and skirt!

…and Brie Bella let Summer Rae beat her! Disgraceful! She uses Danny Bryan’s moves, wears his attire and cannot win a match? I know he’s leaving the game but come on!

Lana walking in the ring barefoot… she’s out to slap up Brie and show her panties I guess! Wrestling nerds PUT THE CREAM DOWN!

Lana just used the X-Factor super move on Brie! Wasnt that Brie’s super before it was X-Pac’s??? Anyway I have it on good authority that Lana can actually fight…

WWE_Roadblock_Poster

and I guess we gonna see that at big BIG WrestleMania. But if Danny Bryan is in Brie’s corner, it’s gonna hurt me to boo her… f**k that – WHOEVER LOSES – I WIN!

I gotta give Triple his props because he didn’t have to defend his title at all until WrestleMania because after all he is TRIPLE TEEF… I guess he clocked on that the IWC might have him up for it, best of luck to Deano… I sincerely hope (like all of you wrestling fans) that this makes things interesting in the storylines…I would hate to see Roman Reigns booed out of Dallas but at the same time the beef is between Roman and Triple to begin with. Fans can’t see that fundamental concept, that’s where I call them IDIOTS.

YEAH I SAID IT – GRANT BODY-P!

“Roadblock is just a name that some idiot in the marketing department came up with…” WHOA TRIPLE SAID THAT???

He just called Ambrose a speed bump or a pothole! That’s not right – Ambrose – BEAT HIM!

No Triple – The Authority doesn’t always win – THE INFAMOUS INFORMER ALWAYS WINS!

What did Dolph Ziggler do to get buss arse by The League Of Nations? Was he shaking his @$$ again like a faggot??? Answers on a postcard please – tweet me @MZATheInfamous!

Never mind guys – JBL told me – he was trolling the authority on the twitter… only the Infamous Informer can do sh!t like that, like walking like Vincent Kennedy, talk like Triple Teef, and show Stephanie how nasty I can be in the sack!

GRANT BODY-P!

Four hot women fighting each other in the ring, who’s the winner here? RIC FLAIR N!&&@!

Look at him! Observing at ringside – just keep your eyes off my Naomi, or else I will joinI am himShadfather in his Flair Files quest!

If you are unfamiliar with the #FlairFiles, check out STC From The UK every Saturday 5pm UK 12midday EST on BDSIR NETWORK – The Best Damn Show In Radio! Cheap plug but it’s not because I pay those bills!

“Becky Lynch refered to her (Sasha Banks) as Nicki Minaj…” What an insult if I ever heard one! How dare Becky say that! Right – Anyone but Becky for the World Wrestling Federation Divas Championship at WrestleMania!

YES TAMINA! Brukk up Becky’s blodclart! (Becky I love you but you don’t diss Sasha like that!)

Michael Cole acknowledges what happened to Naomi happened to Conor McGregor, and if that is the case, then Naomi baby girl, NO SHAME in losing to Sasha. I still love you!

Charlotte stepping in to brukk up Becky & Sasha – TEEF!!!!! Now that it’s a Triple Threat match.. my prediction may have changed slightly…

Superb contest between The New Day & Y2AJ… Jericho goes for the Codebreaker – Big E uses counter technique – into the Big Ending – BLAOW! New Day wins!

OH SNAP!!! Jericho just turned evil on AJ Styles! You mean to tell me that WWE made those shirts and after like a week this happens?!!! The GRANT SAYS something must have changed within creative… maybe WWE’s original plan was to have these two ride together but the fans were like – NO – we wanna see AJ Styles shine as a singles competitor! Stop this Tag team sh!t! Triple Codebreaker to AJ Styles – BLAOW!!!

I don’t care how good of a wrestler Tyler Breeze is – if he dresses like a faggot – I got no props for him… Tyler is WACK! Kalisto out shined him on every level.. I think Breeze should join the social outcasts and then eventually, future endeavoured and off to TNA with his cumse-cumsa @$$!

GRANT BODY -P!

 

Big ups to the Big Boss Man – HALL OF FAME 2016! Yes I can ride to that! But you see what corruption get him? Hung up by the cell by the Don of Dons! NO JUSTICE, NO PEACE!

Golden rule of fighting Wyatt – you don’t fight one, you fight all four, and unless you are Undertaker & Kane, you don’t stand a chance! Even Stone Cold Steve Austin was once tempted to rush the ring and drop stunners on the Wyatt man dem! (Hold that thought – WrestleMania 32 is in Dallas Texas after all!)

Big BIG WrestleMania 32 LOGO

Clearly that Triple TEEF is not afraid of Wyatt! Crowd chanting YES! As if they gonna clash… FOOLS!

I think Deano as got the picture! TRIPLE TEEF setting up the announce table! But Deano hit the Dirty Deeds on Triple – BLAOW!!!! Aaaah sh!t!!!! That’s it Deano, get these fools gassed up! Because once Triple uses the hammer… THAT’S IT!

SALUTE. GRANT BODY-P!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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NEW STC LOGO 2015

Reproduced from the original by The Infamous Informer

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Monday Night Raw #1139, March 23, 2015!!!

 

Smack Talk Centre-Raw

Smack Talk Centre Raw Logo

The Infamous Informer

SHOUT OUTS:

Big up The Perfect Plex Talk Radio massive on BDSIR Network… Yes I was on their show this week…. YOU KNOW WRESTLEMANIA IS HERE!!!

Big up the PWL crew… yes – your boy is gonna be special guest enforcer in a live match…. and yes Venom I see you… sitting in your ‘throne’… Well THE GRANT SAYS – I was a King in my previous life!
Venom throneGRANT BODY THRONE - P

YOU KNOW WRESTLEMANIA IS HERE!!!

Snoop Dogg is in the hiz-house! He wants to get his wicked way with the divas!!!!

YOU KNOW WRESTLEMANIA IS HERE!!!

I’m the Infamous Informer, and I have NO sympathy, NO compassion, NO remorse, especially for you Roman Reigns haters if he happens to defeat Brock at WrestleMania!!!

YOU GOTTA BE EXCITED NOW!!! RAW #1139, HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZUh-Oh….RAW didn’t start from their tribute to that Perro dude who passed away last Friday at AAA…. clearly wrestling purists ain’t gonna like that…

OH SNAP!!!! STING OPENS THE SHOW!!! YOU KNOW WRESTLEMANIA IS HERE!

Mike Cole just called him ‘The Icon’ Sting…. Wrestling B!tches shut the f**k up!

Oh… I preferred the Sting that didn’t say sh!t and f**ked people up with his bat…. never mind….

He’s only here to take down the evil TRIPLE TEEF!!!!!

He should take ‘out’ Stephanie McMahon too while he’s at it..

Wait a minute – Stephanie stealing The Rock’s words in her promo?? She can’t do that!

Stephanie – you can’t say that about dogs? If you say they are ‘Loyal’… how do you explain Undertaker????

Steph was gonna slap Sting! And no doubt she would have done it! But Sting’s reflexes are powerful!

I thought Triple Teef would have come out in his jeans and leather jacket and all that! Look at Stephanie’s face as she draws for the hammer!!!!

But Sting sends for his baseball bat! Swinging it around like he’s ready to hit Triple out the park!

YOU KNOW WRESTLEMANIA IS HERE!

STC WRESTLEMANIA 31 SIGN BDSIR

Nikki Bella wins! AJ elbowed Paige accidentally, knocks her out, Nikki takes advantage, hits the Rack attack – BLAOW!!!!

Another match that’s happening that you wanted at WrestleMania but it’s not… Dolph Ziggler Vs Danny Bryan… this is the part where fans computers are at risk… because wrestling fans have a knack for masturbating over technical matches like these!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

I knew that dutty Snoop Dogg would be partying with the diva dem!!!! He’s on that SnoopMania!!! That is a slap in the face to AxelMania…. well not in my case!!!! Hold up – you think he might get a Axel Vs Snoop at WrestleMania???

OH SNAP – the original Hulkamania is here!!!! Ok Axel you might be in trouble now!!!! Did you do the gimmick justice??? Hulk Hogan just quoted some of Snoop’s songs!!! And says Axel’s smoking Angel Dust!

YOU KNOW WRESTLEMANIA IS HERE!!!

Hogan box down Axel! Snoop dashed Axel out the ring! But Snoop – don’t do the Hulk celebration… your arms ain’t built for that!!!

Ok Cesaro & Tyson is fighting the Jobberdores… this is the part where I go to the toilet… for a #2… 35-45 minute rules apply!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Rusev is here, where Lana at? God damnit this is not cool! Oh Rusev – dispose of Swagger quickly… what did Rusev do – long d!ck Lana and break her ovaries????

We gotta see Lana at WrestleMania surely! You think she gonna cost Rusev the title??? Anything could happen in the World Wrestling Federation!!!!

Let’s be real – when was the last time you were actually excited for an US Title match???? Rusev has destroyed Cena here! Brukk him up all over the ring, and crushed his @$$ with the Accolade super move on the announce table! That’s what’s up, put storylines into the mid-card titles! We care now! And don’t make it a one-off just because it’s big BIG WrestleMania!

Ha! here comes that little bugga who don’t read the news – Bray Wyatt…

As much as Wyatt is carrying this storyline brilliantly by himself, the crowd wants Taker!

I see Wyatt can use a bit of sorcery!!!! Calling it now… Undertaker has WON this match…. Wyatt believes in himself and that’s good… but remember this… OFFICIAL BAD MAN MOVE IN SILENCE!

YOU KNOW WRESTLEMANIA IS HERE!!!

All Undertaker said was: YOU WILL REST IN PEACE! That’s it!!!! Let Wyatt run his mouth, Taker don’t have to say nothing!!!

OH  NO!!! Some jabroni named Kid Ink is performing with Skylar Grey at WrestleMania??? I’ll leave my cussing for the STC From The UK show…

Big ups to my dude Kevin Nash! He’s in the Hall Of Fame 2015! He was always one of my favourites… ever since he stole Pamela Anderson from Shawn Michaels…. that was brilliant!!!!

Shout out to Michael Finney… I feel your pain my dude… WWE denying the British Bulldog yet again. Don’t give up… KEEP GOING!

Right I seen it on Smackdowns…. Dolph Ziggler defeated Danny Bryan… well this is RAW and the Infamous Informer is watching… so Danny you best not lose!!! But here’s the twist… who’s the special referee?

Looks like it’s gonna be Dean… F**k!n Ambrose!!! This man is capable of anything! He could be the most unpredictable ref since The Rock!!! If it doesn’t matter when the Rock counts to 3… then you f**ked up!!!

See? You’re getting quality wrestling…. now SHUT THE F**K UP & ENJOY!!!!

Muthaf- Ziggler won???? URRRRGH!!!! RAW is ruined!!!! Only joking!!!!

YEAH Ambrose hit the Dirty Deeds on Ziggler – BLAOW!

Send for the ladder, tryna reach for the intercontinental title but all the participants are all fighting for it! These guys fighting like Kaley Cuoco is at stake!!!

kaley-cuoco-mmxiv

Sorry Kaley… that short hair of yours needs to grow back girl… your husband is WACK!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!T!!! BRRRRRROCKK LESSSNAR in the hiz-house!

YOU KNOW WRESTLEMANIA IS HERE!!!

That’s a wonder – No one has cut off Heyman’s mic! Maybe WWE has finally learned! To defeat Brock, Roman might as well kick in the door wave in the 4-4! Rape Sable! Take the kids and rename them – Reigns! WHOA!!!!

Roman Reigns is coming down the stairs!!!! From Reigns says his fam is gonna be at WrestleMania.. I’m sorry – Reigns has WON!

Holy f**k – did Reigns just take the title out of Lesnar’s hands like that???? Lesnar – can’t take the title back from out of Reigns hands??? Gotta make the ninja look strong after all!

THE GRANT SAYS: I’m glad Lesnar has left it up in the air about his contract… hell – WWE probably played a part in it… to keep muthaf***az guessing, I suppose you will have your answer.. at big BIG WRESTLEMANIA! IT’S HERE!!!! LET’S ENJOY IT MUTHAF***AZ!!! AND DON’T BE A B!TCH ABOUT IT!

SOUNDHORNS!!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#WHOEVERLOSESIWIN

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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Monday Night Raw #1101: June 30, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! WHOEVER LOSES, I WIN!!!

Yes John Cena! 15 times World Wrestling Federation Undisputed Champion!!!! It’s the way he won the titles as well, he hardly did anything in the match, he lay down for like 25 minutes in the match… then he dropped his super move on Kane & Randall, climbed the ladder, and the way he smiled at the camera when he took the titles… let’s be real – THAT WAS F**KED UP!!!

Shout out to WWE for ruining the Summerslam main event – John Cena Vs Brock Lesnar for the title…why the rarse did you release the poster before Munny Inna Bank start? But wait guys!!! CARD SUBJECT TO CHANGE. But don’t bank on it like the PPV!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Enough of that sh!t, we must move on. I got my pringles, my galaxy chocolate cookie crumble, my supermalt, I got strawberry ice cream for later, jaffa cakes… I’m ready for this sh!t, are you??? RAW #1101! HOL’DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZWord on the street is there is a returning ‘WWE champion’ in the hiz-house! Uh-oh… I can see the Philippa Brooks fans getting the Vaseline out…. oh jesus…

Uh-oh Triple Teef & Stephanie have a smile on their face… why the f**k is the crowd chanting Phillipa’s name? Yeah stop living in the past like Stephanie said!

Here comes the new World Wrestling Federation Champion! Ok you attitards don’t all rush to the toilet at once! Rub it in their face Cena! 15 times rude boy!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Cena is hoping to give Danny another opportunity to fight for the title! OH NO! Cena is on the cover of WWE2K15!!! It just gets better!!!! Stephanie dropping two foot to Cena’s music! I’m telling you! Stephanie is a hip hop head!!!

WWE2K15

But you’re not a hip hop head Triple Teef!!! Don’t talk that hip hop sh!t!!!! HA! HA! HA! Don’t give me joke!

Triple just gave Cena that same choice that Vincent Kennedy asked Austin! You want the easy way or the hard way!

Well the hard way it is! Fatal Four Way jump off at Battleground! Cena Vs Roman Reigns Vs Randall Orton Vs my hero Kane!!! And if Cena becomes superman that night as usual, Triple will draw for his Plan B: Seth Rollins!!!

So after what happened at Munny Inna Bank, maybe Dean Ambrose will go after Kane either somewhere down the road or at Summerslams! Don’t mind me I’m just doing the science…

Word up, I’m gonna tweet Stephanie and ask her what tunes she’s into… don’t believe me? WATCH!

Seth Rollins – I am finding it hard to hate you…. you are still the don! We are treated to another contest with him and RVD!

Who tried to tell me that Seth Rollins Curb Stomp super move was weak? That’s right it was Ian Cooper! GET IN THE CHAIR!!!!!

WROOOOOOOOOY!!!! Everytime Seth Rollins is about to cash his cheque, Dean Ambrose will appear and f**k him up!!! So what if it’s Cody Rhodes Vs Damian Sandow over again from last year….but with more INTENSITY and more MILITANT!!

UH-OH!!! here comes Rusev!!!! Fly that flag in celebration! Rusev – don’t you have thought of f**k!n Lana??? You must do surely!

Who will be America’s next failure??? OH NO! It’s that bastard Swagger and Zeb SAM_3287Colter! They represent everything about America and go against muthaf**az crossing the borders!

Is it me or is Lana laughing at Zeb Colter’s promo?

I guess Colter has thrown away his deportation list! He sees the big picture! Don’t think for one single SOLITARY SECOND that I will support Colter & Swagger just because they just turned face. They still disrespect MY PEOPLE! We The People? The Grant Says ‘WE, THE TIMBERLAND BOOT UP YOUR B!TCH @$$!!!’

The Usos entrance gotta be one of my favourites right now! Everything they say comes from the heart and then the pyro – BLAOW!!! Not only will they be in WWE 2K15, but hopefully The Wyatt Family’s entrance with the audience with their cell phones on! Big up to Jerry Lawler telling JAY-BEE to put his phone down!

Haha! You jabronies may not like JAY-BEE & Mike Cole not calling the match but instead talking about the dirty clothes of Luke Harper…BUT I DO… so F**K YOU!

GRANT BODY-P!!!

I’ve come to the conclusion that this ‘Whole World In His Hands’ thing depends on the crowd. See in certain cities they will sing that sh!t!!!! Other cities they are as dead as Fandango when I get my hands on him for kissing up my Layla!

Damn Nikki, they treating you bad because Brie sacrificed herself??? You gotta fight my girls by yourself? Oh well Nikki… good luck!!!

Since you jabronies have started sh!tt!ng on the WWE2K15 cover… maybe I should join in and see what it’s like to be a IWC b!atch… maybe Bo Dallas should be on the cover!!! I mean, he inspires millions the world over! All you gotta do is BO-LIEVE DAMNIT!

I’ll tell you this – Total Divas Season 3 gonna be MAAAAD if Stephanie and Brie’s storyline gets involved in the script!

Why have I got this feeling that Nikki WILL WIN this handicap match because Miss Girl Bye-Bye is acting a fool??? Oh forget it… They won but Miss Girl Bye-Bye is still acting a fool. What happened to U.N.I.T.Y. ladies?

Well ain’t that a b!tch… I’M AFRAID I GOT SOME BAD NEWS… Wade Barrett out the game with a shoulder injury… the Intercontinental championship is vacant. Shadfather says The I.C. Title is cursed, Mia Bonita says SmackDown is cursed, THE GRANT SAYS WADE BARRETT WAS CURSED EVER SINCE HE BURIED THE UNDERTAKER ALIVE IN 2010!!! You see? If Undertaker doesn’t get you in the physical, he’ll get you in the mental and spiritual. That’s my story and I’m sticking to it!

Battle Royal jump off at Battleground for the Intercontinental Title… Well The Grant Says I have a feeling who is gonna win that… I’m gonna hold my tongue for now.

You what? Kofi Kingston defeated Cesaro during the commercial break? Now we back on and Cesaro beating down de black man? RACIAL MAN RACIAL!!!!!

This is f**ked up – is it because Cesaro knows Switzerland are gonna get knocked out the World Cup? Nah man – I like my Cesaro but Kofi has to go postal and beat down Cesaro like he did Randall!

YES! VINCENT KENNEDY!!!! Er wait a minute… that’s not VINCENT KENNEDY!!! That’s SANDOW KENNEDY! Oh hell naw!!! Hang on his impression might be good…

Oh dear Stephanie is not too happy!!!! She gonna send someone after Sandow for impersonating Vincent Kennedy…. NOT THE NOT SO GREAT KHALI!!! And he won as well! OH MY GOD NO! One chop to Sandow’s head top – BLAOW! Shadfather turn your head! I think he did quite well! What’s up Steph? Time of the month? You need some Infamous cocky with those vitamins girl???!!!

GRANT BODY-P!!!

The former WWE Champion is here! The Miz!!! Thank you Felix Pizarro for spoiling it for us! GET IN THE CHAIR!!!

He was filming The Marine 4? Wait a minute – wasn’t Summer Rae in that film too? And I’m sure he’s taking shots at The Rock here talking about Hollywood and turning his back… sounds like The Miz is embodying that role again! He’s out to main event WrestleMania…. boring….boring…bor-

BREAK THE WALLS DOWN!!!! BUMBACLART!!!! JERICHO???!!!!! LAWD HAVE MERCY!!!! Not one, but TWO former WWE Champions! How I laugh at one of the guys on Perfect Plex Radio who said Jericho was out with Fozzy… you can NEVER believe anything Jericho says!

Yeah talk sh!t now Miz – PPPPPPPPPP!!!!!! Jericho just punched the Miz through school buses!

HOLD UP!!!! The Wyatt Man dem!!!! They just brukk up Jericho!!! This is gonna be an EPIC storyline! Suddenly I am looking forward to Battleground! Money In The What???? In one fell swoop, RAW is BETTER than the PPV!

Now time for my baby girl Layla doing her ting! Forget about Fandumbgay – I’ll F**K HIM UP! WWE book it – Fandumb!tch@$$ Vs the Infamous Informer at Summerslam!

Now the ponce is fighting another ponce in Dolph Ziggler… say what? Summer Rae offered a truce to Layla??? I don’t like the smell of Summer Rae’s pum-pum…black man loves his fried fish but not if it’s rancid as Summer Rae!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

WTF is this??? Now Summer Rae is sticking her tongue down Ziggler’s throat???? URRRRGHHH DIRTY RATCHET!

See I said that this Stardust and Goldust was just a phase leading to the Summerslam Rhodes clash… but I dunno… because they are over with the crowd! I saw this match with them and Rybaxel on Munny Inna Bank, so I ain’t watching it again f**k that!

One thing worth noting – why are the crowd chanting FEED ME MORE at Ryback now???

Why do Goldust and Stardust look like they are in love with each other? I suppose you’re all off the hook Razor Ramon, Piper and especially Ahmed Johnson!

Are there still haters on Paige saying she should go back to NXT? BACKFOOT!!! AJ LEE IS BACK TOO??? MONEY IN THE WHAT???!!!

You mean to tell me that AJ Lee returns and all you b!tches can chant is CM Punk??? You wait til I go on radio… that’s all I’m saying!!!

Backside – we gonna get a rematch! AJ LEE! PAIGE! DIVAS CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH! HERE WE GO!!!

AND IT’S ALL OVER!!! SMALL PACKAGE DEFEATS PAIGE!!! AJ LEE – NEW DIVAS CHAMPION!!!! DROP THE BOMB ON EM!!!

Can you believe that after all we just seen, we have come to the main event! And that Triple TEEF is at ringside! There might be a sledgehammer nearby watch out!

Look at Roman Reigns embracing the audience and that Triple TEEF looking at him!!! It’s almost like Triple Vs The Rock all over again!

UH-OH!!! my hero Kane is out to destroy Cena! So that Seth can cash his cheque! Tombstone Cena into the concrete – BLAOW! But don’t forget – Ambrose WILL f**k up Seth! REMEMBER ME TELL YUH!

LOOK W’HAPPEN NOW! Ambrose came to brukk him up! But then Reigns with the spear to Kane again – BLAOW! Then the stare down between Reigns and the evil, EVIL, TRIPLE TEEF!!!! THIS IS AWESOME? THIS IS MUTHAF***K!N DAN! Like I could live through Roman Reigns warrioristically, I don’t give a damn if that word don’t exist! The road to Summerslam has begun people!

OFFICIAL STC THEME TUNE FOR WWE BATTLEGROUND 2014!

GRANT BODY – P!

#VOCAREADREGNUM!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#GWARNYUHBED

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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Monday Night Raw #1100: June 23, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! 3 Lions On The Shirt turned into 3 B!TCHES ON THE SHIRT!!!! WHOEVER LOSES, I WIN!!!!

GRANT BODY-P!

All you have left to celebrate is the 1100th edition of Monday Night Raw… Now there is a Munny Inna Bank Briefcase match, Seth Rollins a.k.a. Mr tandem engine is already in the match. Which 6 superstars will join him? And The Infamous Informer tells you this: If Dolph Ziggler is in that match… HE AIN’T WINNING SH!T!!! That’s not a prediction, that’s a SPOILER!!!!

Enough of that, LET’S DO THIS! RAW! #1100!! HOL’ DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZMissing 6 minutes of the opening segment of Raw because the laptop crashed is BAD FOR BUSINESS!

ON YOUR KNEES VICKIE!!! BEG LIKE A BIATCH!!!! YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN FIRED WHEN YOU TRIED TO F**K WITH THE UNDERTAKER BACK IN 2008!

So let me get this right so I can understand this! Vickie can either get fired, or fight Stephanie McMahon in a match? Vickie I understand the legacy of the Guerrero name, but Vickie your name is Guerrero only by a piece of paper!!!!!

Intercontinental Championship jump off! Wade Barrett Vs Dolph Ziggler! One of em buried the Undertaker and got away with it… the other walks around with a SWAG here to show the world…. hmmm who shall I back????? NONE OF EM!!!!

4-on-3 Handicap jump off! Reigns, Sheamus & Cena Vs Randall, Bray, Cesaro & Bertie! Who shall I back? I just wanna see RUCKUS!!!! That’s how the F**K I roll!

USO BRUDDA LET’S START THE 1100th EXPLOSION!

WTF???? Now the Wyatt man dem come out to a f**ked up organ version of the Whole World In His Hands??? I thought they were shutting that sh!t down!

Jimmy Uso got clotheslined out of his boots rude boy! Jey ain’t coming out here not just to spectate f**k that! He’s out here to brukk up the Wyatt bwoy!

Is that Jey’s super move? ‘U-SO CRAZY’??? A body splash off the top ropes?!!!

Irrelevant, the Wyatt man just f**k up people whether they win or lose… but come the PPV, BWOOOOYYY!!!

What’s up Bray! Nice of you to drop in on the titan tron…. how come you muthaf***az don’t diss Bray and say he’s live via satellite?!!!

You know what? Vladimir Putin’s face is so DRY that I’m starting to think that he’s an official bad man!!!!

Vladimir_Putin_-_2006

This should be interesting! Cameron and Paige at commentary, while Alicia Fox and Naomi are engaged in combat! Give me a chance to check out the attire!

It just breaks my heart that Cameron has beef with her sista Naomi…. don’t worry readers, I’ll be ok as soon as Layla comes on later…

I gotta agree with Cameron – she is one of the stars on Total Divas!!!! She gives me joke every week!

No wonder Shadfather is annoyed with Jerry Lawler! He should be throwing shots at Paige and Cameron left & right! Shadfather is right – fire Lawler and Hire Charlamagne Tha God!!!!12zCHARLEMAGNE-articleLarge

HE’S DA MAN!!!! Have you heard his interviews with female celebrities? Think Lawler in Attitude/Ruthless Aggression Era x10!!!! I look up to this man. He is an inspiration to us all! Howard Stern MOVE OVER!

Talking of inspiration…. BO-LIEVE!!!! The most inspirational superstar of all time in WWE?

Say what? Titus O’Neill loses to Bo Dallas and JAY-BEE calls it the greatest streak in sports entertainment???

SORT HIM OUT UNDERTAKER!

OH NO!!! IT’S THE EVIL ONE HIMSELF!!! TRIPLE TEEF!!! TRIPLE TEEEEEEEEF!

He got something to say about the Briefcase Munny  Inna Bank ladder match….sssssshh…..

YOU HEAR THAT IWC DICKHEADS!!!! Triple said that the contact can be cashed in any time up to a year… so don’t pressurise the winner of the match!

The participants:

KOFI KINGSTON!

WACK SWAGGER!

DOLPH ZIGGLER!

RVD!

WADE BARRETT!

You’re improving on your English accent Triple!

STC MUNNY INNA BANK

Wait a minute…. where’s the 6th participant Triple? You introduce Seth Rollins who you say is gonna win this Munny Inna Bank, I got 5 in my list here! Ain’t there supposed to be 7?

Seth – words from the wise – wrestling fans don’t get over sh!t – they are still talking about the muthaf**k!n screwjob, they still debate about Chris Benoit’s death and the family, Seth – some of em think Philip Brooks is coming back!!!!!

Why the f**k did Triple laugh at the thought of RVD winning the match this year? RVD won the thing back in 2006! (One of my favourite years in wrestling I might add…)

I hope you make an example out of Seth, Mr Monday Night! It’s the 1100th show – REPRESENT!!!

It’s a nice idea to have someone win the title at the PPV, and then somebody from the contract match cashes in on the same night…. but truth be told, I don’t want that to happen. It seems kinda obvious though doesn’t it!

OH SNAP!!! I forgot about Dean Ambrose!!!! Baiting the match up right there between Seth Rollins and RVD!

Dean wants in the Munny Inna Bank contract match! I don’t blame him either! He says he wants to climb the ladder and grab the cheque… THE GRANT SAYS he’s more out to f**k up Seth Rollins! Dean gotta be the 7th dude!

PLUS! Danny Bryan gives his thoughts on him being stripped of the title on the pre-show…. BWOY!!!!! I just wanna say, just for the record, my hero Kane is not involved in a match yet…I’m just saying…

Really Wade Barrett? You gonna beat down Dolph Ziggler so much that he has to change his name??? I’m all for that – The lord is a forgiving lord, and I was created in his image, therefore, I forgive you Wade! DESTROY ZIGGLER!!! DESTROY HIM!!!

Now I think about it…. maybe Ziggler should win… I’m just doing the knowledge…

HA! Ziggler hit his Zig Zag super move, and Barrett rolled out of the ring! NICELY DONE!

Well thank you very f**k!n much Virgin Media, you did it to me again didn’t ya! I was actually engrossed in that Wade Barrett Vs Dolph Ziggler match and your internet connection just had to falter didn’t it? You best sort it out and make sure I don’t miss Vickie Guerrero Vs Stephanie McMahon! Dun know I’m backing Stephanie! Never liked the b!tch Vickie word up!!!

(Yes I am watching via stream because I’m a struggling broke n!**@ tryna make ends meet!)

Might as well play some good ol’ Tekken while I’m waiting…. F**K!

Just in time to see the match! THIS IS WHAT I CAME TO SEE!!! I didn’t know theyGRANT - BODY - P put mud wrestling in this sh!t!!! OH SNAP! Stephanie threw Vickie in the soup!!!! Vickie is outta here! Stephanie feel sweet! Singing the goodbye song while doing the Danny Bryan chant! She can’t do that!

NO!! VICKIE PUSHED STEPHANIE IN THE SOUP!!!! Oh my gosh that murky narstyness!!! I bet Triple is in the back ‘feeling’ himself right now!!! You know Steph is gonna get it later in the bed!!!

There hasn’t been a mud wrestling contest like that in years! Not since the Torrie Wilson days!!!!! WOW!!!! If only it was bra & panties and Vickie actually won the match… don’t get excited guys, TV-14 ain’t coming back…

Hmmm… Paige Vs Naomi WWE Divas title at the PPV… it’s a heartbreaking prediction I’m afraid… but you can catch me on YouTube this week with the Munny Inna Bank Prediction blog and I’ll tell you how I feel about it! Alternatively you can catch me and Shadfather and maybe more on the STC From The UK show on BDSIR NETWORK – Cheap plug but not cheap coz I pay the bills around here!

Instead of being entertained badly by Sandow dressed up as some president and Big E mashin him up… oh hang on!!! Pastor Langston???!!!! I like that promo right there! ‘Enough is Enough-ha! We-ha! This is our America-ha! We will stand-ha!!!!’ They say most black pastors are corrupt, so this is what Big E be doing when he’s not in church…. put your eyes back – SHE’S MINE!

BIG E LAYLA

Do you just ‘turn off your ears’ to Cena’s promo and just gaze at Renée Young’s sexy @$$? Things you wanna do to Renee’s sexy @$$!

MAIN EVENT JUMP OFF! 4 on 3 handicap match! the ladders are already there! F**k it – let’s do this ladder match right now!

This is interesting – the mighty Super Cena cannot best Cesaro in a test of strength contest!!!! HAHA!!!

You have no idea how high I am on this Bray Wyatt dude – he was once known as Husky Harris…. HUSKY MUTHAF***!N HARRIS! he had no skills, from that to WrestleMania XXX with John Cena, now he is in the main event, and could become WWE World Heavyweight Champion! HOW CRAZY IS THAT! DROP THE BOMB ON EM!

See that’s why you f**ked up Broadus Clay! You had some bullsh!t @$$ gimmick that worked for Cameron & Naomi!

Oh dear all is not well with these tags on both teams! You know this match ain’t gonna end decisively!

Damn son! Super moves all over the ……. hang on…. MY HERO KANE????

OH SNAP!!! I GET IT!!! KANE WANTS IN!!!! MY HERO KANE IS THE 8TH PARTICIPANT!!!! YES! I KNOW WHO I’M BACKING! But wait – BLAOW!!! Roman Reigns hit the spear on Kane!!!!!

Now that question is answered, looks like Big E & Rusev are gonna have a Part II, the contract ladder match is gotta be a show stealer surely! The Divas title match should be a great contest in Paige and Naomi, Plus Danny gotta give his views… Munny Inna Bank is gonna be DON!!!!

GRANT BODY – P!

#VOCAREADREGNUM!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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Monday Night Raw #1097: June 2, 2014!!!

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The Infamous Informer

data:text/mce-internal,

I figured out why wrestling idiots said Payback was rubbish… because you didn’t turn up. Hopefully Philip Brooks, they will finally leave you alone.

Where are your CM Punk memes now Ian Cooper?! How do you like your hero now Ash Blick? Even Nicola Box is ashamed, and removed the ‘CM Punk’ from her name…

When will you fools learn that you cannot test the lyrical manifestations of the Infamous Informer???!!! RAW #1097, HOLD DAT – BLAOW!!!

WWF PROPA TINGZFace it Evolution! You Evolved back in 2005. IT’S OVER FOR YOU! The Shield are far too strong! I think all three should be the World Wrestling Federation Champion straight away! If Danny can’t fight, give the belt to the Shield!!! BELIEVE IN THOSE OFFICIAL BAD MANS! TWICE IN A ROW MUTHAF***A!

Oh my god look at Triple’s eye!!!! BLODCLART!!!

What??? I thought you said the rivalry dun at Payback Triple? Oh for f**k sake fans CM Punk is DUN! Don’t chant his name – he loves hockey now.

OH SNAP!!!! First Brie Bella, now Batista just quit the WWE as well??? He can’t do that!!!(Oh I think you’ll find he can Grant… he gotta promote his Guardians of the Galaxy film!!!) Evolution D-U-N – DUN!!!!!

Question – why the f**k is Cesaro walking like that??? Him look like he’s constipated and sh!t!!!!

Question #2 – why aren’t the fans now chanting Batista??? He quit in Triple’s face…. chant his name then! Where’s all your memes? I bet you will all be queuing up at the cinema to see his film…. YOU DUMB RARSE!

So in this team of RVD & Sheamus Vs Cesaro and Barrett, RVD gets the pin on Barrett… does that mean RVD gets another shot at the I.C. title??? I have to ask these things because the wrestling fans need to know these things!!!!

Question #3 – why aren’t you chanting Brie Bella??? Or should I say Brianna Danielson? She quit in Stephanie’s face, and Yes! Yes! Yes! her way out of the building! Don’t you want her to come back???

Look what they have done to Damien Sandow…this is a heartbreak… please creative let this lead to somewhere… what happened to his robe, and telling muthaf***az SILENCE! And his cart-wheel?

WELL IT’S THE BIG SHOW!!! Well I’m glad he’s in this segment and not tryna stop Rusev because I fear that’s where that storyline is going…

PPPPPPPPP!!! Thank you Big Show! He just punched Sandow through school-buses like Froch did to Groves!

All you gotta do is BOLIEVE! He goes up against Kofi Kingston. Question #4: Where’s my hero Kane to interrupt the proceedings????

Oh dear! the crowd chanting BOring!!!!! They can’t do that!!!!! (Er yes they can Grant, They paid their money!)

OH NO! Stephanie is going to the ring to make an announcement about the WWE GRANT - BODY - PWorld Heavyweight Championship??? Yo Danny! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!!!! DON’T LOOK BACK!!!

Oh no Batista this is what you may want to hear! And you quit?

Is that how it goes down in the streets? If Danny can fight by the end of this month, he has to fight Kane in a stretcher match? No Steph! Make it an ambulance match! If not then the Money in the Bank match will have both titles hung in the air??? What’s Cena doing out here? You not the face of the company any more muthaf***a!!!

So he drops real talk on Stephanie’s fine @$$ and on top talks about her t!tt!£$… she sets my hero Kane on him!!! Embrace the hate John!!!! Hopefully Kane will start going after Nikki Bella! DO IT KANE!! GET DEM T!TT!£$!!!

Well thank you very much Los Matodores and that bullsh!t 3MB… I went to make my pudding because you jabronies were on and look what you make me do, trip up on the wire and accidentally lock off the laptop… not only that, I missed my girl Alicia Fox… I don’t know what the f**k she did so I’m gonna play this footage right here… apparently she was cussing bad words in Germany…. can she do that??? That is Question 6!

You think I’m interested in that Adam Rose/Wack Swagger match??? F**k that I’m watching this video!

Fans – STOP CHANTING THAT MUTHAF**!NG CM PUNK! HE DOESN’T GIVE A FLYING F**K ABOUT YOU! Brie Bella and Batista does! CHANT THEIR NAMES! I swear this CM Punk thing is getting me angry star! IT’S F**KING OVER! STOP BEING SO F**K!NG RETARDED! WHEN WILL YOU GET IT THROUGH YOUR JEREMY KYLE THICK SKULLS??? That’s Question 7!!!

Oh dear…. The Wyatt man dem are here… but there is an empty rocking chair… oh dear! Cena what you done to Bray??? YOU KILLED HIM??!!! That’s Question 8!

Talking of chairs, what do you think of this special chair that I’m making for Ian Cooper? STC’s #1 CM Punk fan who got fooled the most? That’s Question 9!

SAW Get In The Chair

PUSH HARD THOUGH IAN!!!!

Oh man these Wyatt mans do not ramp! They seek vengeance… and defeated the USOs… can you imagine Harper & Rowan as tag team champions? It would be all over for the tag team division!

Bertie Vs Ziggler in a Money In The Bank qualifying match? BACKING BERTIE HERE! COME ON BERTIE!

That’s it crowd, chant for Ziggler… he is there fighting… he cares about you… I don’t care about him personally, but he CARES!

YES!!!! That’s a tap out!!! Ziggler nah go nowhere!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! BERTIE ADVANCES!!!! YES!

Ok… can Rybaxel win again??? two nights in a row? It could be huge!!!!

WHOA!!!!! Rybaxel win again???? Backfoot! The end is near!!!!

Rusev is about to be honored by the Russian Federation Ceremony? For what – beating on our brothers??? I wanna hear wither ‘Kick In the Door Wave in the 4-4 or ‘Somebody gonna get their @$$ kicked?!’ But this means Lana gonna be there with her tight blouse & skirt… Lana is that girl – you gotta go Lexington Steele on her @$$! You just cannot help but think pornographic thoughts when you see Lana! Like I couldn’t bring her home to mom, nah-mean?!

HA! HA! You can’t tell the crowd to stop their USA chants Lana! They want to put their d!ck in your mouth! Even the women!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

Cue the Russian Anthem! WROOOOY!!! Listen to how it sounds triumphant! Here’s Question 10 – Does Rusev know the words? Considering he’s actually Samoan?!

Word up – how many teams can say they brukk up every member of Evolution? NONE!!! The Shield are OFFICIAL BAD MANS!!!

You hear that Randall? Get out here so that Roman Reigns can brukk you up with the symbol of excellence!!!! So Triple comes out with the symbol of disgrace! HE HAS BROUGHT THE HAMMER!

Wait a minute – NO!!!! Seth Rollins!!!! But…But…But!!!! I thought you were brothers??? Why you took a Triple TEEF endorsed chair and destroy your brothers??? Why? Tell me WHY??? DAMN SON!!!

Let’s be real about one thing: We knew someone was gonna turn evil, STC’s Negrodamus predicted that it would be Roman Reigns… but Seth Rollins? I forgot, his name is Seth…. suddenly that music springs to mind… if you are a Street fighter fan, you know what I mean!

BEHOLD THE GLORY THAT IS THE TANDEM ENGINE!!! This should be Seth Rollins new music!

GRANT BODY – P!!!

#VOCAREADREGNUM!!!

#DOTHEKNOWLEDGE

#GETINTHECHAIR

#GWARNYUHBED

IT DON’T GET NO BETTER! STC 4 LIFE…..BEEEEEEEATCHHHHH!

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